The Comics Curmudgeon

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Metapost: FOOBISH HILARITY

A one-off, if only to keep it in a post separate from the sad previous one: today’s Shortpacked (that’s the comic by David Willis, the genius who brought you the Margo Warhol t-shirt) is a must-read for foob-haters.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, July 10, 2007 at 10:30 pm and is filed under For Better or for Worse, metaposts.

175 responses to “Metapost: FOOBISH HILARITY”

TB Tabby
July 10th, 2007 at 10:36 pm [Reply]

God…”Muppet Goosed By Satan” has never been more fitting.
Poteet
July 10th, 2007 at 10:36 pm [Reply]

Thanks, Pope Josh, and SHORTPACKED, I love you. That Elly nose is perfect!
Missbookworm
July 10th, 2007 at 10:37 pm [Reply]

I’ve loved For Better or For Worse since I was little, and I’ve loved Shortpacked! for about a year. And I must say, this is by far my favourite parody ever. XD
Doug Puthoff
July 10th, 2007 at 10:38 pm [Reply]

7-10: SF: First Hilary’s reforming her rock ‘n’ roll band, then she’ll either become a druggie, pregnant or both. You need to take charge of family again, Ted! Get online and visit http://www.family.org. You want your daughter to grow up to be Courtney Love?

7-11: GT: Gail looks as if she should be living at Charterstone with Mary Worth and the gang.
CrabbyGenes
July 10th, 2007 at 10:39 pm [Reply]

Oh, wow! That’s FANTASTIC!! Thanks for the link, Josh!
Echo
July 10th, 2007 at 10:40 pm [Reply]

I love Shortpacked. In fact, it’s what brought me here.
The G-Man
July 10th, 2007 at 10:50 pm [Reply]

That was awesome! He even got the forced and stupid pun in the last panel!

Like so many others, I started out liking FBoFW, but, as time went on, I became disillusioned. This happened about the same time I began to almost dread reading the comics page, which was shortly after The Far Side and Calvin and Hobbes went.
Benicillin
July 10th, 2007 at 11:02 pm [Reply]

The “burnsauce” panel alone transcends the genre and becomes pure art.
Rusty
July 10th, 2007 at 11:06 pm [Reply]

He actually snarked FW even better. The Shortpacked guy, that is.
ChefMike
July 10th, 2007 at 11:07 pm [Reply]

thanks to gags like this, and the “Funky CancerCancer” strip from a while back, Shortpacked is becoming one of my favorite webcomics.
mumbles
July 10th, 2007 at 11:09 pm [Reply]

Very funny stuff!

Speaking of FOOB, we’ve all been hearing about how the new house is small, but they ain’t kidding. That thing looks like Ted Kaczynski’s shed in the first panel Tuesday. Here’s hoping April goes insane and starts terrorizing car lots, cinnabun restaurants, and people who write overwrought and blustery historical novel chick lit.
Islamorada Girl
July 10th, 2007 at 11:18 pm [Reply]

Wow.
Chat Noir
July 10th, 2007 at 11:21 pm [Reply]

And in Wedesday’s FOOB, April’s descent into darkness (by which I mean acceptance of her mother’s all-powerful ~~bitchiness~~ wisdom) is complete.

April’s thought bubble should read: “She understands. And she doesn’t give a shit.”
Chat Noir
July 10th, 2007 at 11:26 pm [Reply]

Perhaps this will work:

FOOB
madCAPS
July 10th, 2007 at 11:31 pm [Reply]

Goddamned FOOBS (Wed.) I think April’s thought bubble should read “Liz was right. Resistance is futile!”
Brown-eyed Girl
July 10th, 2007 at 11:33 pm [Reply]

Shortpacked is great!

And, today’s FOOB is up. Elly appears to say all the right things to April, but notice how she still manages to invalidate her. April is “confused?” To me, Elly is saying that April feels hurt and angry because she’s wrong about something, as usual.
CrabbyGenes
July 10th, 2007 at 11:35 pm [Reply]

Wednesday: A little late in the day for “understanding,” isn’t it Elly? Shit!
Plinko Commie
July 10th, 2007 at 11:44 pm [Reply]

And what the hell is up with April’s first two panels? “We had a slight difference of opinion … about this house DON’T TOUCH ME!” Who knew Eva felt so strongly about the house?

And was it ever explained why April moved in the first place? She could have had a room in the old house as the ~~bought bitch~~ au pair for Mikey Wonderbutt and Druggana. I’m sure the answer is in one of those god forsaken letters, and I’m just as sure I won’t read them.
Leu
July 10th, 2007 at 11:56 pm [Reply]

Today’s Shortpacked! would be so much better if Liz didn’t look so much like Joyce.

Just kidding, Willis, don’t hurt me!
Chat Noir
July 11th, 2007 at 12:00 am [Reply]

18 – Plinko, I think Deanna was the only one really jazzed about the idea of April staying in the ancestral home. Probably because she might be able to drug April, stick a yellow mop on her head and sneak away before anyone realized Mommy had lit out for Mexico.

They did, however, leave April’s bunny to be tormented by Mike and Dee’s Patterspawn.
ElSanto
July 11th, 2007 at 12:08 am [Reply]

Both the FOOB and FW Shortpacked! are made of eternal win.

His Elly just makes me laugh by looking at her.
Regina M Markowski
July 11th, 2007 at 12:13 am [Reply]

I think what the misunderstanding regarding Evah is that she realizes what a spoiled bitch Apwil is, and that’s just totally unacceptable while remaining part of the inner circle. C’mon, cut me some slack. All they did was move the kid two blocks away, kept her in the same school system, and are doing everything in thier pover to make it up to her. Make WHAT up to her? When I was 17 and a senior in high school, my parents decided to move from Detroit to a jerk water little town 50 miles away, pull me out of my all girls prep school, and dump me in a public school with, I kid you not, an agriculture club. Aside from that, I wasn’t allowed to have a driver’s license until I turned 18. I would have been panting with glee to have April’s situation.
bats :[
July 11th, 2007 at 12:16 am [Reply]

Shortpacked!’s Funky Cancercancer:

http://www.shortpacked.com/d/20070416.html
Cafangdra
July 11th, 2007 at 12:18 am [Reply]

NAILED IT.
Echo
July 11th, 2007 at 12:20 am [Reply]

Regina — I was going to post something about what you posted in #22, but first I have to ask: are you joking? I sincerely hope so.
Kronkina
July 11th, 2007 at 12:42 am [Reply]

MT After yesterday’s horrifying close up of Sam’s new eyes, Elrod gives a break today by panning out as far as possible. Meanwhile, Sam’s left breast plans on calling Mark later. I wonder what that’s all about.

FOOB And Lynn’s fantasy mother-daughter relationship goes ever deeper into…well, into fantasy.

BB (a) Look at the size of Killer’s phone, a la 1984, only text messaging wasn’t available at that time; and (b) that’s not called “flirting;” that’s actually called “sexual harassment.”
Mibbitmaker
July 11th, 2007 at 12:51 am [Reply]

NewFOOB: Elly understands?! Ah, but I know why: It’s all trainsman’s fault! HE wanted the train space. HE made the deal and dragged El along.

And Eva, storming off just because she thinks April’s spoiled? No “I lived in a war zone” story, just stomping out like… like a spoiled baby?? Oh, Apes, the hell with her! That one lost me at “men are cowboys”.
Trotzenbonnie
July 11th, 2007 at 12:57 am [Reply]

Good lord…
http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20070711&name=Family_Circus
This just fries the sarcasmeter all to hell.
Mibbitmaker
July 11th, 2007 at 1:04 am [Reply]

FW: Phone message: “And the life you have left will be –3… months. Thank you… Lisa…. Moore.”

A3G:
Tommie: “Hi, I’m Skin!”
Margo: “And I’m Bones! How the hell are ya?”
Obviously, Ruby’s never seen Nichole Richie!

9CL: You’re boring!
Brown-eyed Girl
July 11th, 2007 at 1:12 am [Reply]

I like Sherman’s Lagoon today.

http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20070711&name=Shermans_Lagoon

Can someone explain what Curtis is doing in the last panel of this strip? Or maybe I don’t reallly want to know.
http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20070711&name=Curtis
Snowglobe
July 11th, 2007 at 1:17 am [Reply]

Love the Shortpacked FOOB spoof! Only one thing was inaccurate: Anthony’s tie should have been significantly shorter.
Sandiera
July 11th, 2007 at 1:19 am [Reply]

22. Regina, April was stuck in the basement after Mike and Deanna moved in and was forced to give them the bedroom set that she paid for, and M&D used the basement to shove their extra crap and Elly actually took her to task for not keeping their stuff neat. Elly and John denied the upcoming move when she asked about it, several times. They’ve ignored her for other siblings. They forced her to give up her pet. This is just a short list of the neglect that April’s been subjected to. She has every right to feel as if her mother doesn’t understand or care. There’s little to no evidence in the comic that Elly and John actually do care for her.

Also, Eva has no right calling April a spoiled brat for being forced to live in a smaller house and having to share a bathrrom with her parents. Eva has her own wing in her house, far enough away from her parent’s wing that she can blast music and they won’t notice.
Gojira
July 11th, 2007 at 1:20 am [Reply]

Some info re: two items from yesterthread:

1. New Yorker Caption Contest: Mamzelle Hepzibah posted a link to Dave’s blog, containing analysis of the winners. Found that Dave’s blog, in turn, has a link to Daniel Radosh’s Anti-Caption Contest, requesting the most inappropriate captions. Some of the CCer captions for the current New Yorker contest may actually be better for Radosh’s.

2. fizzy logic and others re: Cheryl from Rochester’s rant on Elly’s Coffee Talk blog, wondering if it’s from a CCer. Actually, it’s from a regular commenter on The FOOBiverse’s Journal. Generally, they’re on the same wavelength as here re: FOOB.

Now that I’ve got that out of my system, as you were with the overnight snarking.
Johnny Cat
July 11th, 2007 at 1:20 am [Reply]

If only more death could inspire more thought, but…nah. That plan has been put to the test. Best we just throw Sam’s face at everyone, wait for political cartoonists to die, and call it sweet heaven.
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
July 11th, 2007 at 1:24 am [Reply]

Hankerin’ for a slab o’ ribs as big as all Texas and tender as a reunion with yer long-lost cousin? Then y’all come on down to Ruby’s Barbecue, just off Highway 466B in Farmington. And tell ‘em Blaze sent ya!

A3G: Ruuuuuuby, don’t bring your pork to town. No, seriously, don’t. How gamy must that stuff be after being packed in her suitcase all the way from Texas? As if carbon monoxide poisoning isn’t bad enough, now we’ve got ptomaine to worry about.

BB: Is that a really huge cell phone or a really tiny laptop? It looks like he’s figuring his chances with Ms. Buxley on a 1970s-vintage Radio Shack solar calculator. Since he’s chosen to talk to Beetle instead of walking right up to her window not 20 yards away and flirting in person, I’d say those odds are pretty slim.

C’Shaft: Little does he know.

Crock: Is that Quetzalcoatl peeking at them from over the dune line in panel 2? I doubt that he’ll accept bean soup as a sacrifice.

FC: “Yep! And it’s our third one. You know what that means!”

GA: Face it, Slim, you’re the dick this time.

(DT)GT: BWAHAHAHA!!! I can already tell I am gonna LOVE this storyline. The washed-up hippie singer, “Tarzana Nights,” Jeri Curl guy covering his ears in obvious pain as he yells for a different song, the prospect of drunken fisticuffs between Kaz and Jeri… oh yeah, this is gonna be epic.

JP: Lynn Johnston only wishes she could draw disadvantaged people as ugly, fat and misshapen as this.

Big Dog: “Don’t get too close. He’s really quick when he flicks a lick.” –Grand Prize, Dirtiest-Sounding Out-Of-Context Caption Competition, July 2007

MC: I would have gone with “Star Boars.” And hey, Ed Power, were you aware “Spider-Ham” was a real parody comic put out by Marvel itself, and the “Fantastic Fur” was one of the hero parodies included in that comic?

RMMD: Damn, I want some toast right now. Or maybe I want to be the toast. I’m all confused.

SFx: 3. Fluoride is added to water to prevent throat infections. False. Fluoride is added to water by the Illuminati and the Industrio-Psychochemical Complex to make the masses more receptive to government mind control. Drink more Mountain Dew, kids!

S-M: Damn, J. Jonah Hitler must be cheap. That’s gotta be the most minimalist TV set ever. I bet he bought that trendy retro ’60s-style egg chair on an eBay auction for $19.01 plus shipping. Now all he needs is a white cat to stroke while he sits in it and a Nehru jacket to wear, and he’s all set to be a James Bond villain.

TDIET: Zucchini pot pie? Tonight, he surely will Barfwell. (By the way, Scaduto: -5 points for missing out on a squid opportunity.)
Trotzenbonnie
July 11th, 2007 at 1:29 am [Reply]

FOOB – Don’t be fooled by Elly’s “understanding”. She’s using one of the most effective tools in the sadistic, controlling mother’s arsenal – denying a child the need to articulate legitimate feelings by steamrolling over them with a flippantly dismissive synopsis of the child’s complex emotional reaction to mom’s fuck-up. How can a child ever learn how to trust or deal with feelings if mom bullies the kid into accepting her definition of them? And it denies the child the satisfaction of working through a conflict in order to achieve emotional independence. It’s like running over the kid’s dog and, before she has a chance to react, you jump out of the car and say “Oh, that sucks. I understand how you must feel. But don’t cry. We’ll just get you a new one.” Mothers like Elly are a psychotherapist’s best friend.

Nice try, Johnston. It could have been a tender mother-daughter moment. If only Elly had just kept her friggin mouth shut….
Christopher
July 11th, 2007 at 1:36 am [Reply]

I actually like tomorrow-FOOB, because that’s some deft parrying from Elly there.

April can’t exactly fire back with “No, I DON’T have a right to be angry!” and at the same time her fundamental concerns are unaddressed.

A highly unsatisfying situation to be in as an angry teenager, and pretty funny, too.

But I think the strip has to be a bit re-written to emphasize April’s anger.
Red Greenback
July 11th, 2007 at 1:41 am [Reply]

Family Circus: Please be fake!!!
Brown-eyed Girl
July 11th, 2007 at 1:41 am [Reply]

35. SSB — It has to be beef barbecue. Real Texans barbecue cows. One of my Texas cookbooks has a recipe for barbecue that begins with instructions to dig a pit big enough for a side of beef. Of course, maybe Ruby is an imposter.

And, in one of those instances of life imitating art, I know someone from Texas who brought barbecue on a trip to New York. Beef barbecue, of course. As far as I know, no one died.
Mibbitmaker
July 11th, 2007 at 1:43 am [Reply]

7/11 (no relation):

Curtis: Forget Thorax — Michelle and Kahdeesha are more boring.

MW: Sorry, Wilbur, you may be confusing your 20 year old daughter for Dakota Fanning over there in Judge Parker. And, no, Wilbur, she’s not.

RMMD: June, you can bite my toast anytime! — nah… too stupid! Nevermind…
Ed Power, writer of My Cage
July 11th, 2007 at 1:44 am [Reply]

Spider-Brick,

Of course I’m aware!

(Geek Alert!)

I loved Spider Ham as a kid. Their mention is a salute to that book.

I also loved ‘Captain Carrot and his Amazing Zoo Crew’. In fact, that was the first comic book I collected regularly.

You’ll also see spoofs of 2 DC characters mentioned in the next few weeks. I don’t use their ‘Justa Lotta Animals’ couterparts though. One was deemed too generic sounding for the joke and the other…well, I liked another spoof done of the character from another of my favorite childhood memories. :D

I figure if I never get to work on Spider Ham or CCAHAZC I can at least show them a little respect while I have the chance.

(End ‘Geek Alert!’)

-Ed
Uncle Lumpy
July 11th, 2007 at 1:53 am [Reply]

#41 Ed –

<fawn>

Your July 4 MyCage was a treat, with two jokes in four panels.

</fawn>
Joe Bftsplk
July 11th, 2007 at 1:56 am [Reply]

A3G - Ruby’s new on the scene, and doesn’t know yet that she shouldn’t say anything to startle the gals when they’re standing that close to each other. Their convulsively bobbling heads could collide and send them both to the ER with cracked skulls.

I intend from now on to refer to anyone’s doing what Ruby has done here as “unpacking the bobblecue.”
Mibbitmaker
July 11th, 2007 at 2:17 am [Reply]

EVERYBODY’S TALKING ABOUT FAMILY CIRCUS:

“Good Lord!” — Norm MacDonald

“Ngah-ah-ah-ah-ah…!!” — Curly Howard

“I’m pretty sure I have an Intellectual Property lawsuit here.” — Mitch Hurwitz, creator: “Arrested Development”

“Oooooh, my Gooooood…” — Ann Ramano (”One Day at a Time”)

“UH-oh…” — Hawkeye Peirce

“What are they doing??” — County Commissioner, “Mark Trail”

“HOLY BOXCAR!!” — Grandpa FOOB

“Eeewwww! She’s a girrrrrl!” — Michael Jackson

“Good grief!!!” — Charlie Brown

“!” — Lio

“BOOOOOO!!” — Crow T. Robot, Tom Servo

“WWWWHOOOOOA!!” — Popeye

“Well… now I’ve seen evrything..!” – random Bob Clampett character, preceeding suicide by giant pistol

“Big deal!” — R. Kelly
Ed Power, writer of My Cage
July 11th, 2007 at 2:20 am [Reply]

Uncle Lumpy,

Aw shucks! Thanks!

(Yeah, I’m haunting the board more than normal tonight. I psyched someone caught the ‘Peter Porker, the Spectacular Spider Ham’ reference. :D )

-Ed
Jack Parsons
July 11th, 2007 at 2:37 am [Reply]

MT: OMG! Sam is Barbara Steele!

http://www.cultsirens.com/steele/steele.htm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barbara_Steele
http://home.earthlink.net/~gershom/bs2.html

Y’know, I think she’s on IMDB also…

Black Sunday is freakin awesome. I rented the rest of the Mario Bava catalog, a lot of it is good too.
Red Greenback
July 11th, 2007 at 2:38 am [Reply]

…where’s CHENNUX?
Jack Parsons
July 11th, 2007 at 2:52 am [Reply]

Hi&Lois: Apparently Chip did not get the memo. Gay men with execrable taste in music like show tunes, not sappy 70’s ballads. You’ve got a lot of learning to do, lad, and the bus station is a fine School For Men.
Jack Parsons
July 11th, 2007 at 2:54 am [Reply]

Barbara Steele just bit his head off. It’s a praying mantis thing, you wouldn’t understand. Ask Zorak.
Trilobite
July 11th, 2007 at 3:43 am [Reply]

Wednesday comics on the march:

Gil Thorp: Oh, those rowdy Central City Gail Martin fans…why does every concert have to end in a riot?

Mark Trail: Once again, the misuse of forced perspective strikes this strip. Mark and Sam find themselves dining underneath the Giant Ugly Hanging Faux-Rustic Lamp of Damocles. Also, isn’t it strange that Sam, a biologist, seems to be a better investigative journalist than Mark? Mark’s just going to go hang around the airport and, I don’t know, think about giant beavers or cross-dressing ducks or something, while Sam is actually going to confront government officials and ask pointed questions in the public interest. I weep for the Fourth Estate.

Mary Worth: Captain Combover is happy to hear his daughter spout the “age ain’t nothin’ but a number” line, because it will make it easier to explain his eighteen-year old mail-order-bride from Thailand.

Rex Morgan: I can’t tell what Heather’s looking at in that last panel. Did she lose a crown on the roofing shingles June served for breakfast? Is it her giant diamond ring that she’s removed because she’ll be, um…using that hand later? Is it a piece of popcorn? MYSTERY ABOUNDS.

Spider-Man: Maria Lopez’s ratings are going to suck tonight. Seriously, which would you rather tune into, a show where a Liza Minelli clone’s guest shows up late and then runs off mid-interview, or a show where J. Jonah Jameson knees Larry King right in the gut?

(Days of unnecessary explanation in Dick Tracy so far: 1)
The Avocado Avenger
July 11th, 2007 at 3:59 am [Reply]

#32 Sandiera and #36 Trotzenbonnie – Preach on, sisters. When April was little, she often acted spoiled. In the last few years, though, the complaints she’s made have gotten more and more legitimate, while everyone (including the author of the strip) just keeps calling her spoiled as though they’re on autopilot and haven’t had an original thought since 1994.

I’d like to know what kind of high schoolers tell a friend to stop complaining about their parents and think about war zones. I don’t think any teenager would pass up the opportunity to point out how life’s totally unfair, man.

Family Circus – Huh, whaddya know. The moment I read that strip, I was struck blind.

#46 Jack – In an amazing coincidence, I just got “Black Sunday” in the mail today.
Angry Beaver
July 11th, 2007 at 4:13 am [Reply]

#41: I also loved CCAHAZC, and have been getting some issues from a local comic shop, takes me back to my teenage years!
Cerulean Pointing Hand of Doom!
July 11th, 2007 at 5:30 am [Reply]

MT: Contractions are used.

FOOB: I’m trying to grok April’s angst, I really … oh hell. no I’m not. I don’t care how 16 you are, moving down the street is NOT A BIG DEAL (the furnitre she bought hersel fis another matter).

And maybe it’s been done and I missed it, but someone really needs to do a parody of Johnny Cash’s Sam Hall with Sam’s Hills.
Ed Power, writer of My Cage
July 11th, 2007 at 5:38 am [Reply]

Angry Beaver,

If you like Captain Carrot, check THIS out!

-Ed
dreadedcandiru2
July 11th, 2007 at 5:51 am [Reply]

FOOB : Is Elly a sadistic control freak or just flat out stupid? From what I’ve seen, it’s a little of column A and a buttload of column B. I’ve read the damn thing since nearly the beginning and I’m convinced that she can’t really count past ten without going barefoot ’cause most of the chaos in her life stems from her being too witless to appreciate the consequnces of her actions.

Curtis: Crud….the poor kid is caught between two liars, if you’ll excuse the foobery.

DtM: Menace index, declining, declining!

FW : Maybe Batiuk should just stick a countdown timer in the last panel or something.
Jamus The Bartender
July 11th, 2007 at 6:02 am [Reply]

FOOB: Repeat after me April…..
“I LOVE BIG MOTHER!!!!”
And it’s okay to want the rats to eat Eva’s face.
(Oh, Shortpacked was terrific and…on the nose, as it were…)
smacky
July 11th, 2007 at 6:28 am [Reply]

Good Lord, I actually agree with today’s Gil Thorp. I was at a They Might Be Giants concert years ago and some asshat in our row scremed “ISTANBUL!!!” after every song. I wanted to say exactly what Bob said today, though I’d probably swap the word “dick” for “friend.”

Of couse the band played “Istanbul” during the encore, so we had to listen to the guy scream it 30 times. He must have thought “Hoooo!” when they played it, like all his hard work was finally being rewarded.

You tell him Bob. Of course Gail is gonna sing “Tarzana Nights.” She’ll also sing “The Ghost Who Walks Fished Me Out of the Ocean This One Time, Then He Never Called Again.”
smacky
July 11th, 2007 at 6:31 am [Reply]

(DT)GT part II: I also love how in the second panel, rather than holding his hands cupped in front of his mouth while he yells, the guy appears to be massaging his head in agony.
Harry Paratestes
July 11th, 2007 at 6:42 am [Reply]

(DT)GT: I hate to say it, but Gail Martin looks like Elton John with a Krispy Kreme cruller stuck in his new hair-weave.
Little A.
July 11th, 2007 at 6:43 am [Reply]

GT: That guy in the background in the first panel looks like he is making a delivery from an Italian grocery store, since he’s carrying a handful of unboiled linguine and a roll of hard cheese, but I don’t think he’ll get to where he’s supposed to go, since he’s sleepwalking.

Great art as usual. Shows you what can be accomplished if you attend The Matchbook Correspondence School of Cartooning and work hard at it.

MCSC alumni are well-represented on comic pages all over the country.
stinky pete
July 11th, 2007 at 6:47 am [Reply]

Here’s a review of the wine served at Shawna-Marie’s wedding.
Whippersnapper
July 11th, 2007 at 7:11 am [Reply]

As a relative newcomer to CC and serial strips, I must say with great sadness that I missed out on Aldomania. I did, however, read the arc when someone posted a link to it several days ago. (By the way, did anyone notice that Aldo looked like Captain Kangaroo? Everyone? And your pets too? And even some inanimate objects? Okay then. Carry on.) It didn’t seem like Dr. Drew was very interested in Dawn at the pool party, so I’m hoping that the comics gods are now smiling upon me, and that this is the beginning of Aldomania Part 2: The Rise of Dawn. I’m hoping for at least one thought balloon duel between Vera and Dawn before Dawn drives her car off a cliff close to Local U.
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
July 11th, 2007 at 7:13 am [Reply]

Sure, “Tarzana Nights” is great, but I prefer Gail Martin’s early stuff, before she went commercial. Like “Basement Apartment Blues,” “New York Women (Skin and Bones),” “Black Coffee and Toast” and “I’ve Got Something To Say (to the World)”.
GotFuzzy
July 11th, 2007 at 7:18 am [Reply]

stinky pete, do you think they’d really pop for the $18/bottle wine (slighly more Canadian)? I’m thinking it was more like Big Box o’ Boxcar.

Smacky, I feel your pain. Way back in the ’80s I was at a Bonnie Raitt/John Fogerty double bill. A braying jackass near me spent the entire time Bonnie was on stage screaming “Fogerty–hoooooooo!” Of course, he was stinkin’ drunk and passed out before Fogerty took the stage and never heard him play a note. Poetic justice, yes, but I really did want to hear Bonnie play as well. Perhaps the braying jackass went on to father our fave FOOB, Gap-Toothed Starey “Hoooo” Guy.

What’s that? I should snark on some comics? Oh, yeah…

MW: Again hammering home the fact that even though Dawn looks like she is somewhere in her 50s, she’s really 20, hmmmmm? Sorry, not buying it.

FC: Most. Disturbing. FC. Ever. Ewwwwwwww.

Archie: Actually makes a cogent point. Still not funny, though. The loving amount of detail on Betty’s camel-toe is more than a little creepy, however.
andreavis
July 11th, 2007 at 7:27 am [Reply]

FC:Dinner at a lousy restaurant, with no chance at sex? Sounds like a date to me, Dolly! (Seriously, EWWW pass the brain bleach)
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
July 11th, 2007 at 7:29 am [Reply]

Brown-Eyed Girl @ 39 wrote:

It has to be beef barbecue. Real Texans barbecue cows.

You’re probably right. But “pork” is a funnier word, surpassed only by “munch,” “monkey” and “spleen.”

And if any of you doe’t agree with me, you can munch my spleen, pork-monkey.
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
July 11th, 2007 at 7:30 am [Reply]

*don’t.

crap. Failure to preview strikes again.
Klipper
July 11th, 2007 at 7:32 am [Reply]

FC: “No Darling, that comes later.” – No doubt these children were horribly abused.

FW: Holy shit! Funky Winkerbean almost made me cry! I’m not even kidding. From now on instead of reading the comics I’ll just drink my coffee every morning while looking at pictures of my dead Grandma and dog. Would that make you happy Winkerbean? Would it? Curses upon you!
Buck Ripsnort
July 11th, 2007 at 7:36 am [Reply]

Been following Shortpacked faithfully since I got this here interweb (I’m his nerd– uh niche market), but that Elly-face will haunt my dreams.
True Fable
July 11th, 2007 at 7:38 am [Reply]

Luann It wouldn’t be such a bad thing for a spin-off strip with Brad, Toni and TJ in it if Evans could keep up the fun in today’s strip. If he then let Luann retire, that would be good too, it’s same old same old with her storylines anyway. Then we could enjoy Brad Gets A Life for a year or two.
And Toni called TJ a Weasel! I like her.
MW I want you to look at that big empty branch. Jack Elrod wouldn’t have left it empty, nosirree. He’d have put a ginormous squirrel or a Drama Prairie Dog on it or SOMETHING.
MT They are sitting down to eat, but by panel two ol’ Figitey Britches has to jump to his feet, but in panel three it’s Sam getting ready to leave, even though Mark is still on his feet. Sit down, Mark, you’re making me nervous.
FW I say, they are strangling the kids in panel two. Talk about a depressing strip, holy shit!
FC … no way. Keane, you are making it too easy for us. “Yes, Dolly, and you’ll need to swallow now at dinner, and then later too.”
DtM Maybe if you scrubbed the moss from Ruff’s mouth, he’d be a little more presentable, Dennis.
DT I completely agree with the guy on the left in the last panel. Dick Tracy strips often make me claw at my eyes.
A3G Margo’s head bobbles at the mention of food, and at the idea that she is considered skinny. You’d think by tomorrow, Margo will allow this woman to live simply because of what she can do for Margo.
FBoFW What, THIS is what the letters meant by April snubbing her mother and Elly being all sad about it? She snubbed her for TWO PANELS; oh, how heartbreaking that must be for the Perfect Patient Understanding Identifiable Elly Patterson!
April, you’re a wimp. Lynn, you really don’t know teenagers, do you? They don’t even have to have a reason to sulk, and it’s better for them to band together to do it whether they agree with each other or not.

Lynnie, just because you want to wrap your flabby arms and bony knees around your Unrequited Fable, doesn’t mean you have to indicate it through your characters. I can tell by the look on that little bird-like face of yours on the Foobsite, that you drool every time you glance South. Yeah, baby. You want this. You want this soooo baaaad. You’re ready to snatch every button on my shirt off, aren’t you honey pie? Pull on my Levis so hard the rivets just pop right off, huh?
Dream on, Perky.
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
July 11th, 2007 at 7:43 am [Reply]

The only thing worse than seeing the Anthony-Liz coupling is imagining Lynn-lust.
Buck Ripsnort
July 11th, 2007 at 7:43 am [Reply]

Gotta admit, actually seeing the damn FC today was a letdown after the comments here. I was hoping he’d be peeing on her, or somethin’.
TurtleBoy
July 11th, 2007 at 7:45 am [Reply]

Re Shortpacked: beautiful. Positively beautiful.

FC: The worst part about today’s installment is that it’s not far from the truth in some circles. Of course, as Jeffy Keane would be happy to tell us, a woman isn’t a person in her own right, but rather just a vessel for her husband’s seed and thus if the vessel is cracked upon delivery, there’s no way she can serve her proper function for her eventual husband. And by Jove, it’s Dad’s job to make sure the goods arrive undamaged! Were Family Circus a multipanel cartoon, the second one would no doubt bear the caption, “But Daddy, you checked my hymen last night!” “Shut up and get the speculum!”

MW: I get it! She was born on a leap year, right? So she’s only “twenty,” but that really means she’s about eighty or so? Notice, however, that Wilbur didn’t actually say “twenty years old.” Maybe she’s twenty Martian years old?
Tweeks_Coffee
July 11th, 2007 at 7:47 am [Reply]

7/11

FC: *shudder*

FOOB: I’m skeptical to say the least. Elly’s probably just buttering her up so that the next take down will be even harder.

(DT)GT: Oh man, this is looking like an awesome plotline. I’m not sure what my favorite part of this is; “The rock-and-roll Carole King” that looks like a Janis Joplin/Elton John love child, the guy covering his ears or the potential of Kaz getting in a brawl. One would think Kaz with his assured estrogen therapy wouldn’t be much of the fighting type, but perhaps he’s still on the roids? For the record; if an artist has a new album out, then they may neglect to play their biggest hit. It’s happened to me a couple times.

H&L: Chip has some interesting music choices there. Elton John?

MT: That chandelier is huge!

R&R: Egads! That sight is truly horrible, one of the more disturbing things I’ve seen lately.

SM: Jameson roughing up Larry King is the best thing to happen in this strip in a long time. Hopefully they’ll drag this out like a Dick Tracy strip.
Harry Worth
July 11th, 2007 at 7:52 am [Reply]

I think that Dawn-Bot has been reprogrammed by daddy to go forth and collect the seed of unsuspecting men so that he can build up his clone collection that will soon take over the world.

BWAAAAAA HAAAAA HAAAAA HAAAAAA.

At least that way, SOMETHING will be happening at the Charterstone.
Justafoob
July 11th, 2007 at 7:55 am [Reply]

Apewill had to move down three houses on the same block.

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa……

Did she have to change schools?

Did she lose any friends?

Did she have to adapt to a whole new city?

Man she still gets her own room with plans to give her the basement.

Seems to me the only problem is sharing the can with Elly, which is probably pretty toxic after a sheet shaving, butt scratching, big ol’ dump.
Widdle Jeffy
July 11th, 2007 at 7:56 am [Reply]

“daddy, is this what a date is like?”

“You know it Dolly. And after I spend big bucks on your meal and the movie we are going to after, I think I might be looking for a little payback.”
Robert Whitaker Sirignano
July 11th, 2007 at 8:10 am [Reply]

Yeah, well, FOOBERVILLE is open to parody, no matter what Chins J-Ston says about protecting her work. It doesn’t fall into that catagory for what Dan O’Niel did and did consistantly, those Mickey Mouse knockoffs he got sued over (quiet rightly too). O’Neil just drew Mickey cartoons wityh adult themes to the point Disney did step on him, whereas The Wally Wood Disneyland Orgy is still in print. (go to Paulkrassner.com)….so many lawyers, so little sense…
stinky pete
July 11th, 2007 at 8:17 am [Reply]

Daddy/Dolly incest joke count = 8, which I believe is today’s limit. Next!
True Fable
July 11th, 2007 at 8:23 am [Reply]

#79 stinky pete: of course, if it was a Mommy/Billy incest joke, it would likely mention her role as a middle school teacher. :-)
Jamus The Bartender
July 11th, 2007 at 8:23 am [Reply]

FC: Oh Sweet Jesus….oh sweet precious Jesus…..Jesus and Mary……Jesus, Mary, Joseph and the wise men……this is bad….Saint Peter on a pogo stick….I yelled out loud reading this one….I need a shower…or two….and it might not do it…..sweet Father, Son, Holy Spirit….
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
July 11th, 2007 at 8:23 am [Reply]

It took me several rereadings of that Shortpacked! to notice that the Anthony-skeleton has a pornstache. That detail alone is sufficient to elevate it from inspired to brilliant.
teenchy
July 11th, 2007 at 8:25 am [Reply]

Re SP!: Bwaaaahahahaha!

I came to it in the opposite direction: CC led me to SP!. While the Transformers fascination aspect of it leaves me cold, I like Willis’ character development as well as his approach to the unsavory aspects of retail. Also, I think Amber looks like someone I might be married to…
man behind the curtain
July 11th, 2007 at 8:26 am [Reply]

A3G — In tomorrow’s strip Ruby finds out that her barbecue was confiscated by the TSA and she’s now on the terrorist watch list.

FBOW — Poor April. She had to move somewhere else in the same Margo-neighborhood, still going to the same margo-school, with the same margo-friends. How horrible. A world turned upsde down.

MW — So Dawn fits right in with a bunch of old, boring, self-righteous farts. Just what every 20-year old wants to hear. 20 going on 60. She should be getting her AARP card any day now.

RMMD — Let’s see. Hugh Avery, heather’s never before seen or met “stepson” who is her own age, if not older. And he’s all she has. What’s up with that?
Harley Quinn
July 11th, 2007 at 8:29 am [Reply]

Darn, and here I was coming to tell you about the Shortpacked comic, but you beat me to it ;-)
Regina M Markowski
July 11th, 2007 at 8:35 am [Reply]

Echo,
Not kidding. Wish I was. But whatever you were going to say, go ahead. I’ve probably already said it myself.
It’s been a long time ago, but I’m still incredibly bitter. No one can say I don’t have staying power.
Krauthead
July 11th, 2007 at 8:36 am [Reply]

FOOB: Ape-will’s life has been turned upside-down?? Let’s see here……..same school, same town, same friends, same neighborhood, same existance in the foobiverse……all that’s happened is she’s moved down the block. Huh. Yeah. Life turned upside-down alright.

So Ape-will complains that she has to share a bathroom with her parents and her bedroom is smaller. This is indeed spoiled-brat behaviour. But it won’t matter, because she’ll be chained in the basement soon enough. Then Jon will snap his train-fingers, and a nice new bathroom will automatically apprear for Ape-will.

I’m waiting for the set of strips where Apewill and Eeva become lesbian lovers…..

C’mon, Lynn, you know you want to!
Islamorada Girl
July 11th, 2007 at 8:40 am [Reply]

DTGT: Advice from an old hippie: never start a fight at a concert if you are wearing Mamie Eisenhower* pearl button earrings. You will be stomped to death by your fellow audience members, the band and security. And the police will refuse to take a report.

*homage to girlfriend Poteet
Islamorada Girl
July 11th, 2007 at 8:41 am [Reply]

And today’s FC: eeeeeew.
Squid Countess
July 11th, 2007 at 8:47 am [Reply]

Pluggers – Oh,come on! Months ago I sent in “A Pluggers idea of a grand entrance is a truckload of new gravel for the driveway” and they bypass it to use this one today about package pick-up? Like all Pluggers are Fed-ex drivers or something? I realize that complaining that Pluggers won’t use your idea is akin to complaining that MC Hammer won’t stage your ballet, but still.
Cornwhacker
July 11th, 2007 at 8:48 am [Reply]

22, 25, 86: I have no idea what Echo wass gonna say; but Regina, your comment amused me because I currently live in Detroit and am active in urban agriculture. There’s a pretty big movement here right now. Your old prep school, assuming it still exists, probably does have some sort of organic farming club or a garden out back these days…
Klipper
July 11th, 2007 at 8:52 am [Reply]

79: Stinky Pete: Did you count the ” FC: *shudder* ” comment ( I don’t know who or where)? Cuz that was the funniest for me.

I guess Islamorada Girl didn’t hear you.
Calico
July 11th, 2007 at 8:55 am [Reply]

“Burnsauce” – Hilarious!

Thanks – that picked my spirits up after the last news.

3G – This is quite odd too, or else I am going batshit insane – yesterday I joked to myself that Ruby maybe brought BBQ with her. I almost posted this musing.
My God, she really DID!
Must…go…see…shrink…turning…into…comic…
Dono
July 11th, 2007 at 8:59 am [Reply]

Is June Morgan is the fastest breakfast-eater in the west, or has the cartoonist completely abandoned Aristotle’s three unities? June is actually holding a bowl of cereal and lifting the spoon to her mouth as she discusses Hugh in panel 1, but in panel 2 when she’s completing her thought, the spoon has been replaced by a slice of toast. Or perhaps a piece of zwieback.
Artist formerly known as Ben
July 11th, 2007 at 9:00 am [Reply]

7/11

S-M: No nomo, flat-top. If you want to get anywhere in this business, you do not push Larry King.

SFX: Wrong! Fluoride is put in the water to weaken our resistance to Soviet domination! Dick Tracy knows all about it.

(DT)GT: Gail Martin looks to be everything we could hope for. Right down to fans who cover their ears while shouting out requests.

H&L: Maybe Soundgarden’s “Blackhole Sun”? Oh, that’s right. It was recorded after 1975, so a teenager wouldn’t listen to it.

JP: What are they doing here, anyway? Does anybody have a clue what the plot is supposed to be?

RMMD: Suddenly I’m curious about how it feels to be a slice of toast.

‘Shaft: Crankshaft travels back in time to crash a “Miami Vice” shoot.

Phantom: If you want to mess with the heads of evil men, sing early U2.

FC:…
…
…
I’m calling the cops.
Mr. Coffee Nerves
July 11th, 2007 at 9:05 am [Reply]

FC: “*sigh* Yes, Dolly, right down to me wishing you were someone else. Jeffy, specifically.”

MT: To order “Rustic Chandelier inspired by Decor De ‘Sizzler,” call 1-800-MT-STUFF. Please note, yesterday’s special, “Vacant Dead Eyes of Sam” is sold out.

FOOB: Since April’s band won’t succeed, she should seek fame by using another avenue…I suggest she read up on the Menendez Brothers.
Regina M Markowski
July 11th, 2007 at 9:06 am [Reply]

#91
If Regina High has an ag club, it’s only there to keep the old confined-to-the-convent nuns busy. They always had some sort of garden behind the fence back there, so maybe they were ahead of the curve.
I hope the ag movement is successful in Detroit. I’ve read a little about it, but am not very well informed. Actually, there’s probably more ag where you are than where I am now. Most of these small towns to the north are bedroom communities and not farms anymore.
Kip W
July 11th, 2007 at 9:08 am [Reply]

S-M – Jonah’s losing patience with Larry King, who hasn’t moved a muscle since we saw him in the strip a week or so ago.

GT – “Friend” brings up a good point. I, for one, am glad that hyperactive loudmouths with poor impulse control go to rock concerts instead of the opera, where we mostly get people who send messages to each other by coughing in Morse Code.

DT – I like the last panel, where one bad guy is trying to gouge his eyes out and the other is attempting to tear his heart from his chest at having seen Dick’s ultra-freakish face emerging from Grandfodder’s slightly less freakish face.

AD – Ha ha! Cavemen got Beemers! See, it’s funny because they’re cavemen!

Archie – Reggie cruelly mocks Veronica’s wrist. Either that, or he’s totally… well. I dunno. It’s hard to be sure if anything in the strip is really on purpose.

CS – “The death of the party.”? Did Batiuk accidentally put a line in Crankshaft that belongs in Funky Winkerbean?

#77 (Jeffy) – Yeah, I figure Bil’s looking at the menu to figure out if he’s spent “enough” on this “date” to “score” after.
Kip W
July 11th, 2007 at 9:11 am [Reply]

ps: Anybody want to start a pool on when Anthony will start looking at April “that way”? After the wedding? Before? During?
GotFuzzy
July 11th, 2007 at 9:13 am [Reply]

Once again, the Washington Post crossword puzzle has a clue that seems like a FOOB shoutout. 11 Down is “Forsaken one,” but at nine letters it’s too long for “April” but too short for “A Pattersaint,” “third child” or “Farley killer.”
Dono
July 11th, 2007 at 9:19 am [Reply]

This is strange. I posted a comment that never appeared, and when I tried to do it again, WordPress kindly notified me that it had deleted my duplicate comment. Interesting indeed.

Anyway.

Is June Morgan is the fastest breakfast-eater in the west, or has the cartoonist completely abandoned Aristotle’s three unities? June is actually holding a bowl of cereal and lifting the spoon to her mouth as she discusses Hugh in panel 1, but in panel 2 when she’s completing her thought, the spoon has been replaced by a slice of toast. Or perhaps a piece of zwieback.
Dennis Jimenez
July 11th, 2007 at 9:20 am [Reply]

I keep waiting for my Plugger submission to turn up, too. When a Plugger asks his wife for a little head, he’s talking about a nice head cheese samitch.
Calico
July 11th, 2007 at 9:27 am [Reply]

#61 – I think I could use a few bottles so I can wash my eyes out after seeing today’s icky, icky Family Incest.
teenchy
July 11th, 2007 at 9:28 am [Reply]

7/11 Luann: Time for TJ to come out of the kitchen clad only in an apron? Wait, wait, do I hear the faint sounds of a Strat with a wah-wah pedal? Bow-chicka-wow-wow…
Calico
July 11th, 2007 at 9:31 am [Reply]

#100 – Meanwhile, Heather feasts on a single Escargot. Maybe it’s her aphrodisiac.
You’re going back to bed right now, young lady!

Meanwhile, Hugh stumbles out of bed and down the hall…just in time to hear things from the other bedroom, the likes of which even Stein and Toklas could only dream about.
gkl
July 11th, 2007 at 9:31 am [Reply]

101: I know you’re talking about food, but even so, “Plugger” and “head” really shouldn’t appear within forty miles of each other. Now my brain is barfing.

MW: And while we’re on the subject of disturbing imagery, does Dawn realize that her haircut makes her face look like a… well… I’m not going to say it, in the interest of keeping some semblance of good taste and in case there are kids reading who haven’t yet developed their dirty minds, but yes, that. Can’t they get back to drawing her hair like a ninja cowl?
Calico
July 11th, 2007 at 9:34 am [Reply]

#98 – My money is on all three, actually.

More ick. Waiter, another bottle of Boxcar, mule!
Kate
July 11th, 2007 at 9:40 am [Reply]

Just after I uncoiled from my earthworm-crouch of misery after the FBOFW where Papa Foob invades his daughter’s bedroom to talk up Anthony, I saw today’s Family Circus.
queek
July 11th, 2007 at 9:40 am [Reply]

Ed Power: *geekgasm* Gotta love funny animal super-hero parodys. Cutie Bunny ftw! Now if she and Omaha could just star in Fantastic Fur 3X, all would be well.

A&J: I just loved the Peanuts shout-out in todays strip. Just wonderful.

FC: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Pibgorn: Um, does Pib have the “faery breath to put mortals to sleep” power? Or just really, really, really bad breath? *confused*

PBS: I love the crocs.

SF: maybe the band could play at ‘tardstock? Between Hilary and Faith, April could learn a few things. . . .
Calico
July 11th, 2007 at 9:41 am [Reply]

#95, #99 – You all might make Katie Couric very, very mad because you’re making me project Sputum on my monitor with your comments!

Forsaken One indeed. I think April may have a new friend waiting for her in the Big Apple.
Jamus The Bartender
July 11th, 2007 at 9:46 am [Reply]

98.
CC OTB ODDS FOR GRANTHONY SPENDING A LITTLE TOO MUCH TIME HELPING APRIL REARRANGE HER FURNITURE, AND I THINK YOU DO. 20-1 Win, 10-1 Place, 5-1 Show

LIZ FINDING OUT AND FLYING UP TO MTICKINGCLOCK TO ENGAGE IN “FINGERCUFFS” ACTION WITH WARREN AND PAUL 30-1 Win, 20-1 Place, 10-1 Show

JOHN UNFAZED AND PLAYING WITH HIS STUPID TRAINS THROUGHOUT THE WHOLE THING 15-1 Win, 10-1 Place, 5-1 Show

EVA POINTING OUT TO APRIL THAT THIS IS ALL HER FAULT AND IT WOULDN’T HAVE HAPPENED IF SHE WEREN’T SO SPOILED 20-1 Win, 10-1 Place, 5-1 Show
Jamus The Bartender
July 11th, 2007 at 9:48 am [Reply]

110. *shakes my head* the above should read “helps April rearrange her furniture if you know what I mean, and I think you do”….I really need to learn to edit better….
June Morgan\'s Larger Breast
July 11th, 2007 at 9:49 am [Reply]

Today’s JP: It seems to me that Big Pussy from the Soprano’s actually survived that boat trip and is in the witness protection program in wine country (btw, do those sibs make the Boxcar?)
The Divine O’F
July 11th, 2007 at 9:53 am [Reply]

Credit Where Credit is Due (2 yesterthreads ago edition)

2 yesterthreads ago Kronkina: Excellent disquisition on nice guys.

2 yesterthreads ago Lynngineering: thank you for your excellent, thoughtful meditation on undercurrents in the blog and personal comic strip history. My background is so similar to yours, including the huge comics section in the Washington Post. When I was a kid I half-believed some of the strips were real, and I did love some of them passionately. During the twenty years I lived in NYC I did not read comics, except that my mother faithfully cut out and mailed to me the daily strips for Doonesbury, Calvin and Hobbes, and Cathy (which was good once, folks, believe it or not). At some point she added FBOW. I no longer feel any kind of personal attachment to any of these strips, alas. I guess the only one that I could say I love these days is Mutts, though there are a number of strips that I like and/or admire. I think, Lynngineering, that your Michael coma interpretations recapture a feeling of depth in the comics that has apparently long since disappeared from the comics themselves.

2 yesterthreads Poteet: I love your imaginary parody!

2 yesterthreads Brown Eyed Girl: The ones that almost always make me smile are Bizarro and Brewster Rockit.

2 yesterthreads Mamzelle Hepzibah: Thanks for the New Yorker caption tips!
Islamorada Girl
July 11th, 2007 at 9:57 am [Reply]

Klipper: Play nice, honey. And remember, I’m a close personal friend of the Emperor Chennux, know what I mean? :-)
Dennis Jimenez
July 11th, 2007 at 9:57 am [Reply]

How ’bout, the only Plugger blow job involves a bicycle pump and a flat on a Schwinn.
Darkefang
July 11th, 2007 at 10:03 am [Reply]

Wednesday’s Comics:

FC: “Is this what it’s like to be on a date, Daddy?”

Only in the For Better or For Worse universe, Dolly.

GT: This audience looks awful angry for what looks like a 1960’s folk rock singer.

I’m intrigued by the guy Kaz is about to get into a fistfight with. On one hand, he’s covering his ears in a desperate attempt to block out the terrible music. On the other hand, he’s shouting out requests for yet more songs.

RMMD: I don’t know why, but suddenly toast seems erotic.
Professor Fate
July 11th, 2007 at 10:04 am [Reply]

FC: No honey – a date is will be when I take you to the Purity ball. (AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! – must get bleach! Must wash brain!)

FW: I can unstand wanting to live in the time she has left but since she’s just going to whine and helmet hair is going to smrik what’s the margoing point?

FOOB: This bugs me at a deep level: April isn’t even allowed to express her own emotions, she is being told what they are – we know best – shut up – here’s a hug now don’t bother me I have sheets to shave.
Cornwhacker
July 11th, 2007 at 10:08 am [Reply]

112 June’s…Breast: I think they make that other wine you like. The pedestrian red that goes so well with fish and chips.

However, I hear Boxcar is developing an oaky merlot perfect for fueling hybrid Saturns.
Klipper
July 11th, 2007 at 10:08 am [Reply]

Islamorada Girl: No disrespect intended. Getting us to stop talking about today’s FC would be like teaching the Close to Home artist how to draw: ain’t gonna happen. Tell Chennux I miss him.
Widdle Jeffy
July 11th, 2007 at 10:09 am [Reply]

You know who is at the table next to Daddy and Dolly?

Rex and his “little brother”.

The prices are cheap and the waitresses never talk down at the Pedophilia Diner.
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
July 11th, 2007 at 10:09 am [Reply]

Dingo, if you’re reading the comments today, am I remembering correctly that you’re from Ottawa, Illinois (not to be confused with the much larger Ottawa where a bunch of Canadian politicians live)? I just found out today that Sesame Street’s Bob — that show’s longest serving human character — is from there.
Plugmein
July 11th, 2007 at 10:16 am [Reply]

Man the artists over at Pluggers missed a great site gag today.

The should have shown Mrs. Chicken Plugger following after her husband Mr. Hounddawg Plugger with a pooper scooper.
The Divine O’F
July 11th, 2007 at 10:16 am [Reply]

Josh: Thanks for posting the link to Shortpacked. It certainly… uh… says it all.
Squawk
July 11th, 2007 at 10:18 am [Reply]

FC: “Not quite, Dolly. For this to be a real date, you would have to be downing a few margaritas while I masturbate under the table.”
Squawk
July 11th, 2007 at 10:20 am [Reply]

FC: “Not quite, Dolly. For this to be a real date, you would have to be downing a few margaritas while I masturbate under the table.”
Klipper
July 11th, 2007 at 10:25 am [Reply]

Incidentally, does Dolly know how quick BD Keane can flick a lick. Seems like this may be relevant.
Cornwhacker
July 11th, 2007 at 10:29 am [Reply]

Followup to my post 118: Here’s the Chardonnay of choice for Raju and the State College* wrestling team.

*Not to be confused with Local University.
Squawk
July 11th, 2007 at 10:34 am [Reply]

FC: “Not quite, Dolly. For this to be a real date, you would have to be downing a couple of margaritas while I masturbate under the table.”
commodorejohn
July 11th, 2007 at 10:34 am [Reply]

A3G – “We’ll get you some pork rinds and biscuits and gravy to munch during the race and you’ll fatten right up!”

Archie – Reggie is looking a lot more like Ataru than his usual Mendo for some reason. (semi-obscure anime reference, complete)

BB – Beetle Bailey has discovered cybersex.

Crankshaft – I like how everyone’s sipping champagne and nibbling hors doeuvres and they’re bringing a bottle of (assuredly pedestrian) wine and a hotdish. The long shadows behind them are a great touch as well, like this is a The Right Stuff-style slow-motion walk. Their duty is to wreck this party, and they’ll be damned if they don’t do it. C’mon, Batiuk, why can’t you be like this more often?

Curtis – has gone to the Pattersons’ lip surgeon.

DT – See no evil. Ingest no evil.

FC – Sooooo many possible dirty jokes…

FOOB – “However, we still don’t actually love you or give a damn about your life, so try to get over it so we dont’ have to listen to your moping, okay? You’re drowning out Michael’s talk about himself.”

GT – Elton John is sporting a new ‘do.

H&L – “Good Day Sunshine” = YES. Also “Here Comes The Sun.”

JP – First Clambake, and now Judge Parker gets its own Magical Negro? (Who, like Clambake, doesn’t seem to be black so much as just having a heavy tan.)

MT – Mark and Sam eat at a Prince Valiant-themed restaurant that hires its waitresses from Gasoline Alley.

MW – “Yes, dear, age is just a number. For example, I may be fifty or so, but that’s just a number, just like your twenty. If you get what I mean…”

RMMD – You know those ads from the fifties that had stuff like women eagerly going down on a Tootsie Roll? (No, I’m not making that up…) Yeah. I guess Wonderbread got into the act.

SM – What, is he going to announce his love for Spider-Man too?

Edison Lee – WTF
The Divine O’F
July 11th, 2007 at 10:35 am [Reply]

Is anyone else having trouble with this site? It’s loading extremely slowly for me… sometimes to the point of timing out, and I have been unable to get it to accept my two most recent posts. If this one does not appear, that would make it three.
Plugmein
July 11th, 2007 at 10:37 am [Reply]

Site gag?

**Sigh**

I meant cite gag.

Sight gag?

Whatevah.
Calico
July 11th, 2007 at 10:38 am [Reply]

#120 – “Don’t stop,
Believin’…”

Arrrggghh more brain bleach NOW

WP Crossword solution – 9 down – “Debutante”
Ick, again.
commodorejohn
July 11th, 2007 at 10:39 am [Reply]

P.S. I’m dreaming that I may have contributed the “starving in Africa” bit to that Shortpacked!

But most likely not; it’s not as though the comparison wasn’t obvious.
Lapsed Librarian
July 11th, 2007 at 10:44 am [Reply]

JP: Randy’s one-time opponent for the judge elections is now working in drag at Trudi and Mulletman’s winery.
Calico
July 11th, 2007 at 10:47 am [Reply]

#126 – Yeah.
I rebooted my PC and it’s OK now.
Must be all those votes pouring in to nominate this site as one of the new Wonders of the World!
(Well, at least it should be, dammit!) : D

JP – I’m fearing that these investors want to buy out Sam and Abby so they can rip up all the beautiful grapevine fields and build condos, or a pseudo-Charterstone community, where people wander into other people’s homes because they all look the same. Bletch.
June Morgan\\\'s Larger Breast
July 11th, 2007 at 10:49 am [Reply]

#118 Cornwhacker, love the Boxcar fueled Saturn.
andreavis
July 11th, 2007 at 10:49 am [Reply]

#125 commodorejohn: I’ll bet Rosa from JP isn’t a “Magical Negro” so much as she’s a “Magical Person of Indeterminant Ethnic Origin (and Gender.)” Personally, I think she looks like a portly Raju in drag. If she starts wrestling full boats, then I’m on to something.
commodorejohn
July 11th, 2007 at 10:52 am [Reply]

#133 andreavis – Certainly possible; JP does tend to have its black people actually look black. She/he is a magical something, that’s for sure.

(I still stand by my earlier guess that this is Eddie Murphy in drag and, apparently, skin-tone-lightener.)
Little A.
July 11th, 2007 at 10:59 am [Reply]

GERNERAL QUESTION TO YOU OLD-TIMERS OUT THERE:

On Saturday afternoons ca. 1958 my father used to bring home The New York Herald Tribune which I suppose didn’t appear on Sunday so the color comics section appeared on Saturday. I remember only two comics: Prince Valiant and Abbey ‘n’ Slats. I think maybe Mutt and Jeff. And there was I think a space cartoon. Please help me out. What other strips appeared in the comics section in those days in The New York Herald Tribune?

I realize I am dating myself here, but in case anybody is curious, I just turned 59.
Original Lee
July 11th, 2007 at 11:03 am [Reply]

Regina and others who are playing the small violin for FOOB’s April: I agree that *in isolation* it sounds as if she were being a spoiled brat. But this is just the whipped cream on top of the sundae of being the afterthought she’s had to put up with the last few years. She’s not able to articulate the whole problem very well, since it would require the whole first page of the Sunday comics and she only gets one or two panels at most. So it comes out as whiny, spoiled-bratliness when it should be a searing cry of teenage angst.

We’ve all had raw ones pulled on us by our parents, as you obviously have. But those of us whose parents have consistently favored our siblings over us have a bit of a soft spot for April right now and we are, I think, getting justifiably pissed off at Elly and John on her behalf. It’s sorta like when my parents raided my bank account while I was at summer camp (which they could do, as I was a minor and they were co-signers) and used the money I was saving to buy my very first car to buy my sister a first-job wardrobe. If they had asked, I probably would have agreed to loan *my sister* the money, because she had been hired by a firm with a dress code that her existing wardrobe couldn’t meet and, you know, it was her first job, but they didn’t bother to ask – they just took it. If I had complained about it at the time, and you didn’t know about all of the other stuff they had done to favor her over me, it would sound like I was being a spoiled brat. Maybe on the grand scale of things it is a small thing to be pissed off about even now (30 years later), but this particular FOOB story arc makes it all come back in Technicolor, and that’s why I am applauding the excellent rants above.
gh
July 11th, 2007 at 11:06 am [Reply]

FC — So, am I the only one here who actually thinks this is kinda cute? I mean, kids, so innocent about the ways of grown-up rituals, such soft hands and that pose like she’s praying or … holding something. Wait a minute. You don’t think … well, that’s just sick. (waves to stinky pete)

(DT)GT — You mean there’s a real Gail Martin? Really? Do you think she’ll sue for defamation of character?

And speaking of suing [or as I like to think of it – grounds for sueage] I missed some kind of LJ dust-up about legal action and can’t reconstruct it. What got pulled?

Your obt. svt.
Dr. Mad
July 11th, 2007 at 11:18 am [Reply]

To gh- the parodies by Od Bean of Sha-non-non’ s cafeteria speech using LJ’s art were ordered removed in a ‘passive-agressive’ lawyer letter from LJ’s minions. The dust up was about whether parody could be considered ‘fair use.’ The law is unclear. Loved the parody, thanks Josh. There is nothing essentially wrong with marrying your chilhood sweetheart, nothing wrong with marrying someone ’stable and dependable’, but there is something wrong with marrying a guy you’re not all that sure about because your Mom is enthusiastic about him. Even ancient Roman fathers who literally owned their children seem not to have had the power to force them into marriage against their will. But, of course, that’s the secret isn’t it? The slow and careful destruction of not only the will but any notion of independent existence, by all available means either fair or foul. [Dang, wasn't going to comment on foob, but todays scene hit a nerve. I'll pretend it was about Rome.] Way back up yonder at #20 something for The Amazing Spider-Brick & comment on TX barbecue, having grown up on the legendary Stubbs barbecue [previous to his Austin move] I can tell you it transports quite well and keeps good, too. That’s because the beef is slow-smoked and more like a Kentucky ham than roadhouse ribs. FYI, TX barbecue done right needs no sauce, the traditional accompaniments are ranch-style pinto beans, ‘light bread’ [thin, white bread], and mustard mashed potato salad, plus a side of sliced onions and jalapeños, all washed down with sweet tea. Mmmm, Mmmm, think I’ll go make a coconut cream pie and chicken-fried steak [and, yes, I can].
Dr. Mad
July 11th, 2007 at 11:21 am [Reply]

Please excuse -it is Old Bean -didn’t preview because everything is loading slow right now.
commodorejohn
July 11th, 2007 at 11:22 am [Reply]

#141 Original Lee – Well said. I’m lucky enough to have parents who don’t play favorites, but watching friend who have, it’s clear just how much that sucks.
gh
July 11th, 2007 at 11:27 am [Reply]

#143 Dr. Mad

See, now I’m mad. Not Dr. Mad, but mad nonetheless. That’s what I was afraid I’d hear. I only hope they are in circulation somewhere. If I knew how to take down her site I would. Unfortunately, my technical skills amount to sticking out my tongue.

I probably also missed the part where everyone called her an asshat. So: hey, Lynn? You’re an asshat.
commodorejohn
July 11th, 2007 at 11:31 am [Reply]

#146 gh – A certain curmudgeon whose username starts with a “c” has it (as well as the Slylock Fox contraband) and would be happy to email it to you if you were to email him at his username plus “@gmail.com”.
Dr. Mad
July 11th, 2007 at 11:40 am [Reply]

To gh- the parodies by Old Bean of Sha-non-non’ s cafeteria speech using LJ’s art were ordered removed in a ‘passive-agressive’ lawyer letter from LJ’s minions. The dust up was about whether parody could be considered ‘fair use.’ The law is unclear. Loved the parody, thanks Josh. There is nothing essentially wrong with marrying your chilhood sweetheart, nothing wrong with marrying someone ’stable and dependable’, but there is something wrong with marrying a guy you’re not all that sure about because your Mom is enthusiastic about him. Even ancient Roman fathers who literally owned their children seem not to have had the power to force them into marriage against their will. But, of course, that’s the secret isn’t it? The slow and careful destruction of not only the will but any notion of independent existence, by all available means either fair or foul. [Dang, wasn't going to comment on foob, but todays scene hit a nerve. I'll pretend it was about Rome.] Way back up yonder at #20 something for The Amazing Spider-Brick & comment on TX barbecue, having grown up on the legendary Stubbs barbecue [previous to his Austin move] I can tell you it transports quite well and keeps good, too. That’s because the beef is slow-smoked and more like a Kentucky ham than roadhouse ribs. FYI, TX barbecue done right needs no sauce, the traditional accompaniments are ranch-style pinto beans, ‘light bread’ [thin, white bread], and mustard mashed potato salad, plus a side of sliced onions and jalapeños, all washed down with sweet tea. Mmmm, Mmmm, think I’ll go make a coconut cream pie and chicken-fried steak [and, yes, I can]. Either that or monkey.
gh
July 11th, 2007 at 11:41 am [Reply]

#147 commodorejohn

Starts with a “c” . . . Count Squidess? I did see the stuff (both), so it’s not so much I want it, I just want it out there. Thanks for the lead, if I change my mind.

Hey, Lynn. You know you’re an asshat? Hurry, Lynnion-charged-with-reading-this-site — go tell her we’re being mean again. Asshat.
T. Chicana
July 11th, 2007 at 11:49 am [Reply]

MW: You know, I don’t think Dr. Drew was that into Dawn. Dawn, he’s just “not that into you!” I just really don’t think. I mean, he looked pretty bored.
I think there were more sparks flying between him and Vera “Limp Pony” Shields. Vera high-tailed it outta there so fast though…maybe if she would’ve hung out, got drunk w/ Dr. Drew…then lil’ miss medallion-wearing 40-year-old co-ed wouldn’t still be thinking about son-of-Dr.-Jeff.
I’m glad I don’t know any doctors socially. They seem obnoxious as all get up!!
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
July 11th, 2007 at 11:51 am [Reply]

gh @ 146: Old Bean’s brilliant strip parodies are still out there somewhere. I won’t say where, since Lynnions lurk everywhere. Does every asshat need bust our only thing here?
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
July 11th, 2007 at 12:02 pm [Reply]

gh @ 146: Old Bean’s brilliant strip parodies are still out there somewhere. I won’t say where, since Lynnions lurk everywhere. Do enforcer asshats now bust our only thing here?
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
July 11th, 2007 at 12:05 pm [Reply]

Yo, gh @ 146: Old Bean’s brilliant strips are still out there somewhere. I won’t say where, since Lynnions lurk around every corner. Do enforcer asshats now bust our only thing here?
Echo
July 11th, 2007 at 12:21 pm [Reply]

Regina — OK then, but I don’t think it’s going to be what you expect.

I moved from a rich Detroit suburb when I was 10. It was the best thing that ever happened to me. The wealthy brats had picked on me constantly for not having Guess jeans, for my parents not having multiple CD players, for my not wearing makeup at age 9, etc. If I had stayed at that obnoxious wealthy school with those twits I have no doubt I would either be dead or addicted to something hard.

I moved to one of those little so-called “jerkwater towns”, and it was wonderful. I made real friends, which had been impossible at the school of prematurely aged snotty materialistic pitiable people. The town was lovely, and my friends and I could walk around it at night. The people were incredibly nice, the school was small but excellent, and *gasp* they even had an agricultural club. Oh no how horrible the existence of 4H. Oh no how horrible no one wore designer crap. Oh no how horrible I knew everyone in my grade. In other words: while I feel sorry for April, I see no tragedy in your story.

I feel sorry for April because her parents never consult her feelings about ANYTHING. They certainly shouldn’t let her decide everything, of course, but not taking her feelings into account at all over a move that was entirely unecessary is ludicrous. This is unacceptable for parents of teenagers, as is shoving her into a basement.
gh
July 11th, 2007 at 12:22 pm [Reply]

#151 The Spectacular Spider-Brick

I discovered I still had access to my previously tagged stash. Good thing too, because there were additions I hadn’t seen. Rock on, Old Bean!
The Clown Boxer
July 11th, 2007 at 1:23 pm [Reply]

Did anyone else notice that Skeletore-Granthony is better looking than the original?
Krauthead
July 11th, 2007 at 4:08 pm [Reply]

FOOB:
Piss off Lynn. You suck. Anymore, I only read your crappy comic to see what rose-colored idiocy and lunacy come next.
Adam
July 11th, 2007 at 6:31 pm [Reply]

http://shortpacked.livejournal.com/240377.html

There’s been an update about one of Willis’ upset fans. Liking FBOFW in an un-ironic way makes as much sense to me as actually liking Care Bears, or being a Republican.
Poteet
July 11th, 2007 at 7:53 pm [Reply]

# 154 — Echo, I’m curious as to which rich suburb it was, but feel free to leave it a mystery if you want. I grew up in Royal Oak, but it was a very different town decades ago when I was a kid. Now I read about how chic Royal Oak has become and I snort into my milk:-).
Regina M Markowski
July 11th, 2007 at 9:47 pm [Reply]

Echo,
You state that your parents moved you at age 10, and you feel that it probably saved your life. I have no doubt that this may be true. The difference is that I was 17 and a senior in high school. My opinion wasn’t wanted nor was it allowed to be stated. I lived in the city of Detroit, not some rich suburb. It just happens that my school was in Harper Woods (all-girls catholic). I didn’t make ‘real friends’ because by the time I got their, all of the life long cliques were well established, and I was seen as an outsider, aside from the fact that my father was police chief, which didn’t win popularity contests in 1973. In addition to the above, I was the youngest of 5, and not a welcome addition to the family. Can you say ‘Surprise!’
All this being said, I still think April’s ass is being kissed to a surprising degree for someone who didn’t give up a whole hell of a lot, and had the option of living with her brother if she wanted to, but didn’t want to have to babysit.
Regina M Markowski
July 11th, 2007 at 9:54 pm [Reply]

BTW, regarding my previous posts, I realize this is a lot of boo-hoo for some crap that happened over 30 years ago, but the FOOB storyline dredged up some old stuff, and I just wanted to comment. I’m really not still dwelling on this crap on a daily basis. Just occasionally….
Drew
July 11th, 2007 at 10:24 pm [Reply]

I’m glad somebody has finally commented on a very annoying thing FOOB has been doing lately; namely, constantly sending April on guilt trips for complaining about something in her life.
Sandiera
July 11th, 2007 at 11:00 pm [Reply]

Regina – The fact that someone else is worse off doesn’t mean that your own feelings are invalid. I lost my job a bit ago and I’m feeling pretty lousy about it. However, I’m not dirt poor and homeless like some of the people I pass by at the bus station on the way to/from interviews. Does that mean I’m not allowed to feel upset?

April doesn’t like moving out of the place where she grew up. That’s healthy and normal. It’s not healthy to tell someone they’re being a spoiled brat for having feelings that are healthy and normal. All she ever really said was that she didn’t like the move. She didn’t whine and cry about how unfair life is or how things were never feel the same, or (insert other overly dramatic expression here). She’s trying to deal with her emotions the right way and people keep telling her to essentially STFU. That’s just not right. Also, her parents clearly favor the other kids over her. I’m surprised she’s hugging Elly at all.
Skulking on the Outskirts
July 11th, 2007 at 11:15 pm [Reply]

73, Turtleboy–clicked on that link, and OMFG!! “I choose to cover my daughter..etc.” WHAT?! SICK SICK SICK SICK SICK SICK!!

I think these guys are just obsessing a little too much over their daughters’ hymens. Creepy.
Regina M Markowski
July 11th, 2007 at 11:27 pm [Reply]

If Elly and John were to have passed up buying this house now because April didn’t want to move, would it be healthy and normal for them to resent her when she moves out in two years, and they have lost out on their chance at having the place they really wanted? Should they have told Mike that he and his family couldn’t move in because it would upset April? If these were real people, I would guess that Mike and Dee didn’t want to have all their belonings burn up in a fire, nor did Elly really want the whole bunch living in her carefully organized house, but they weren’t asked in advance if it was okay for the fire to happen. Families compromise because they love each other, and make do when they have to.
Original Lee
July 11th, 2007 at 11:27 pm [Reply]

Regina – Thanks for sharing your pain. We know you weren’t wallowing; we were just trying to present another POV. FWIW, moving during senior year always stinks, methinks, and as the child of the junior high vice principal in a very small town, I certainly can relate to your being the daughter of the police chief. I think that’s actually the power of FOOB – that the storylines are making us so angry shows how much talent LJ is wasting in self-centered preening. The strip used to be so true to the kinds of things going on in the lives of my family and friends, and now it’s gone from “write what you know” to “write what you think would be perfect”. And that’s just sad.
Skulking on the Outskirts
July 11th, 2007 at 11:33 pm [Reply]

Original Lee, that’s terrible! Forgive me if I’m presumptous, but I’m fuming on your behalf. Even if it was thirty years ago, it’s still outrageous. I hope they paid you your money back.
Skulking on the Outskirts
July 11th, 2007 at 11:42 pm [Reply]

Original Lee, I was, of course, referring to your post at #141. Didn’t realize I was going to surface right next to you when I posted. My sonar needs recalibrating, I guess.
Regina M Markowski
July 11th, 2007 at 11:44 pm [Reply]

Original Lee, I totally understand your pain. We had the ‘favorite’ sister who could do no wrong and an only son, who of course walked on water. It really sucks that your family would feel they had the right to take your money because your sister was more important, at least at that point in time. Families suck a lot of the time, but most of us wouldn’t part with the one we have if given the option.
I agree with you about Lynn. I used to love her stuff. My kids are about the ages of Mike and Liz, and I used to identify with the things they went through. Now, I’d rather remove my eyeballs with a grapefruit spoon than admit that I agree with her on anything.
Original Lee
July 12th, 2007 at 12:00 am [Reply]

Regina – Being married Canadian adults with kids, presumably John, Elly, Dee, and Mike aren’t legally allowed to complain out loud anymore but are instead required to be stoic about it all. Seeing as April is still a minor, she is exempt and should therefore be allowed a little minor griping at the unfairness of it all without being called a brat or told to suck it up. Liz certainly gets plenty of exemptions because she’s still single, although I remember a lot of “well, if you’d have just stuck with Anthony you wouldn’t be having all of this pain, now would you?” when she was emoting all over the place a few months ago. So maybe the underlying irritant is really not so much that April is complaining at all but that she is the only one who expresses legitimate complaints out loud and gets slapped down for it. If that makes more sense.
Original Lee
July 12th, 2007 at 12:15 am [Reply]

Skulking and Regina – Thanks for the sympathy, however belated. No, my folks never paid me back or ever really acknowledged that it had been my money to begin with. Sort of the “families compromise because they love each other” kind of thing – they didn’t think I really needed a car of my own at that stage in my life, so I should have been happy to help my sister get a leg up in her career. My sister, BTW, was surprisingly unspoiled by the favoritism and had no clue that my parents had done that to me until about 12 years ago. She was horrified and insisted on paying me back with interest, and did so a little at a time over the next 3 years. (And for the curious, my grandmother loaned me the downpayment for that car and helped me with the insurance and I paid her back with interest until she passed away several years later.)
Regina M Markowski
July 12th, 2007 at 12:28 am [Reply]

Lee,
At least you’re lucky enough to have a sister with a soul. A lot of people would have said, Well, mom and dad took the money, go talk to them about it. Also, you grandmother sounds awesome. Even if you had been out the money, you found out that you have some family who love you, and that’s worth the cash.
Skulking on the Outskirts
July 12th, 2007 at 2:23 am [Reply]

Original Lee, I’m glad you had other family members who cared enough to pick up the slack from your parents. Even thirty years ago, and you a minor at the time, I have to think you might have had some means of legal recourse open to you. I may be wrong about that, there were (or still are!) some pretty medieval laws on the books about minors basically being the property of their parents, and therefore not allowed to own property themselves. But I just do a not-so-slow burn when I hear of parents treating their kids that way.
I had a very difficult relationship with my late mother. But I do remember that one time when I was about sixteen, and she was in some financial straits, she asked me to sign a form which would give her permission to collect some Social Security payments which I had been receiving (unbeknownst to me) due to the death of my father many years earlier. Or maybe it was life insurance benefits, I’m not sure. But they had been deposited in a savings account for me all along, for me to collect when I turned eighteen. At least she asked. I don’t understand why your parents didn’t ask you, unless they really knew (that “families compromise” BS notwithstanding) that they were in the wrong to take your money.
Sympathies again on being treated so shabbily.
Help me. James
July 12th, 2007 at 4:39 pm [Reply]

I started reading FOOB, what ten years ago. As a lark. And now, I can’t stop looking at it. I really want to – and I can’t stop. I can’t.
Fahbs
July 18th, 2007 at 4:59 am [Reply]

The only thing missing from the FOOB parody is the saintly Pattersons having to put up with a loud mouthed caricature of a horrible person with squinty eyes and bad teeth.

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