Metapost: Long-awaited comments of the week!
Well, Keg of Curd has had a good 18-day run, but it’s finally time to crown a new comment of the week!
“Having moved as far as possible from menace, Dennis is now distancing himself from making sense, giving us this baffling nugget of Family Circus-grade confusion. Snowballs are free? Compared to what? Other roughly palm-sized objects that you throw at people?” –Rhekarid
And the runners-up! So funny!
“You know, I’ve been thinking about this recent Mark Trail storyline, and how the ‘small cigars’ played a major part. I just wish that there existed some diminutive by which we could refer to these small cigars … perhaps ‘cigar-ling’ … or ‘cigar-ina’ … or possibly even ‘cigar-ette.’” –Mariko
“Has anyone noticed the FOOB website is down? Did it collapse under the weight of its own desperation?” –Mir777
“I always appreciate the Kwanzaa story for both the insanity and of course the life lesson. While I’m absolutely amazed by the insanity of this year’s gem, I’m relatively certain that the lesson — don’t leave your pregnant buffalo-wife alone after stealing from a two-headed snake — doesn’t apply to most people.” –rhymes with puck
“Damn you, April. Damn you for having what I want: bangs tousled just so by the awkward breath of teenage angst, trying to guilt you into awkward sex.” –kitty
“Does Margo seriously believe people drink champagne to quench thirst? I think this might explain something about her.” –fluffy
“‘And after champagne, who’s going to the chiropractor after screwing up their neck?’ ‘I AM!’” –Fireball
“So Eric’s leaving for China, leaving his gallery in the hands of a manager with a single day of training and a short attention span, plus a guy who’s probably in the supply closet right now, huffing paint fumes and airplane glue. My guess is that the gallery has been hemorrhaging money and this is a convoluted plan to collect a surprisingly large insurance settlement.” –Darkefang
“I can buy that Lu Ann in hypoxia paints better than Alan drunk off his ass, but I think that’s more than balanced out by the fact that, sober or drunken, Alan can think in sentences and count money and stuff. True love waits!” –Dr Marion
“Abbey’s blacked-out face is a visual representation of her state of mind before what she’s come to refer to in her own mind as simply ‘it.’” –Nate
“I hate long goodbyes … therefore, our imminent lovemaking will be confused, frenzied, and brief.” –Hubris
[In response to Hubris's comment above]: “Also known as ‘doin’ it Gil Thorp style.’” –Artist formerly known as Ben
“I wish tomorrow’s panel would feature Slylock and Cassandra, sharing the bath and a Max sandwich. And I don’t mean the threesome type. I mean the really slice up the little bastard and eat him type.” –McManx
“I think Reeky Rat perfectly symbolizes man’s insatiable desire for self-betterment. Clearly he’s fighting an unwinnable war against his own revolting stench, but there he is, in the shower, trying to scrub off the repugnant hand life has dealt him and give himself the chance to ascend to a higher stratus of society, albeit through a life of crime, deception, and ill-fated schemery. ‘Get me a towel!’ he shouts jubilantly, ‘Everything’s comin’ up Reeky!’” –Stupendous Girl
“You know, I really wish FBOFW would spend some time letting us know how the characters feel about the way their lives change over time and to do so with either long, drawn-out exposition or with short, witty zingers to which we may or may not be able to relate.” –PeteMoss
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Frank Parsnip
January 8th, 2008 at 12:09 am
Congrats to all the COTWeekers up on the float!
Moon Mullins
January 8th, 2008 at 12:16 am
Congrats to all! A very funny bunch!
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
January 8th, 2008 at 12:19 am
Congrats to all! Huzzah!
bats :[
January 8th, 2008 at 12:20 am
It’s even more beautiful than the Rose Bowl parade floats! Especially since we use Doritos and Cheetohs for the decorations! Snark on, at 5 mph!
Citric
January 8th, 2008 at 12:20 am
rhymes with puck, the moral of the story is that while stealing is totally awesome, gets you women and everything you desire, you run the small risk of your wife turning into a buffalo after you get her pregnant. This is why you wait until the end of it!
I dunno, I should be sleeping, sorry if that seems incoherent.
Mariko
January 8th, 2008 at 12:31 am
Congratulations, everyone!
Oh, fatigue is not a good thing to mix with excitement about being a COTW runner-up again! Woooo! This is what I imagine Ted Forth would feel like if he ever used a radio-control airplane to take out John Patterson’s trains.
True Fable
January 8th, 2008 at 12:32 am
FBoFW I’m getting mighty damn tired of this crap from her. It calls for a response:
Lynnie Baby,
Why O Why must you continue to cough up the same old hairball that Cathy Guisewhite keeps hacking on year in and year out? And just to show you no ill will, I won’t say anything about what love RodJohn handles. I’ll just sit back secure in the knowledge that you will piss and moan and wail over your weight gain AS IF ANYBODY IN THE WORLD REALLY GIVES A FLYING FUCK, and I won’t have to do a thing.
Oh my sweet little dessicated droplet of pigeon drool, you know you are simply pining over my Red Hot Fable body that puts Sam Driver’s sad little cobblestone gut to absolute shame. I can see your beady little eyes glistening with want right now all the way from Canada. You want the Fable, I know. You want to do a one and a half gainer into the comforting clutches of my Memory Foam Mattress and ride the wild Fable for all you’re worth.
But my pet, that will never ever be. The Fable is simply too much for you. Even if I had these “love handles” of which you speak, you could not possibly hold on to the kind of motions I can make, and God knows the turns would kill you.
Suffer, bitch!
Truman A. Fable
An E ticket ride in your A ticket world
bats :[
January 8th, 2008 at 12:33 am
Tuesday toons:
FC: how about peanut butter on a shingle, you little ape?
FW: aw, don’t sweat it, Les…looks like Bull’s due for a massive coronary in a couple of months, judging by the cargo of lard he’s heaving around.
JP: the best part of waking up is having Abby fall out of her robe.
Hmm, it just doesn’t scan like the old Folger’s jingle.
MT: I think that turtle suspects. You can never be to careful around turtles.
MW: and Mary’s small heart grew three sizes that day…
Then she gave Thomas all the vet bills, the pet supply bills, and the kibble bills, and all was right in the biddyverse.
RMMD: wow, Niki’s expression in the last panel…has he actually wised up?
FOOB: oh, yay, we haven’t managed to miss finding a John-is-an-asshole strip! Then again, I’m a little surprised that Elly knows what “rotund” means.
(Another yay for someone remembering those old salad days of E tickets!)
True Fable
January 8th, 2008 at 12:36 am
And congratulations to Rhekarid and all the float riders! I had a feeling that ‘un had “winner” all over it.
fluffy
January 8th, 2008 at 12:40 am
Yay, I finally got one!
Frank Parsnip
January 8th, 2008 at 12:42 am
A3G: Yeah, let’s go to Blaze’s party because I could sure use some liquid fun after the buzzkill of hearing you tell me you “love” me.
MT: In panel 2, the great turtle who bears the sorrows of the world upon his back knows that he only has a little time before Mark Trail brings the police back. In that part of Canada, it takes about 24 hours for a police report to be taken seriously because that’s about the amount of time for rye whiskey to run through their systems. When you’re a police officer in the frozen tundra that is Canada, you have to make your own fun.
MW: Chester’s owner is Ralph Malph… and he named the frickin’ dog “Ralphie”? Tomorrow’s strip will include introducing his good friend Potzie who happens to have a dog named “Putzie”, and they will talk about their friend Richie’s older brother Chuck, who has been missing for even longer.
Sex Organ, M.D.: Wouldn’t it be a little smarter to wait and see what the other car is? I mean, if it just turns out to be another pedophile then Rex really doesn’t have anything to worry about. On the other hand, perhaps it would be smarter just to get in their own car, double-back and pass the car. If it is the bank robber guy, I think he’d never assume that the headlights headed towards him were Rex and Niki coming back. Hey, The bank robber guy might even see their car coming and wrongly assume that the road leading up is free and clear and perhaps even speed up. Just saying that Rex and Niki don’t have to be freezing out there in a winter rainstorm unless this is all a setup by which Rex figures they’ll need to use their body heat to avoid hypothermia. Ewww.
Barney Google/Snuffy Smith: Mary Worth could learn something about the art of the dog deal from Lukey here. Yes, a pig in exchange for a puppy. Wonder how long that’s going to feed Lukey.
Curtis: Yes, Curtis, it’s important to read authors who are routinely ignored. Here, let me dig out some neo-Maoist tracts and a few copies of Watchtower that were shoved under our door. I’ve also got an acronym dictionary that has been tragically overlooked. Ooh! Here’s that Jews-for-Jesus brochure I got from some guy on the street two weeks ago…
Trotzenbonnie
January 8th, 2008 at 12:47 am
#4 – bats :[
And they’re rolling by on wheels made of Funyuns.
Woo Hoo! Throw me something, oh funniest of the funny people!
dale
January 8th, 2008 at 1:04 am
COTW : cock of the walk
I bet you don’t hear that term every day.
Tamex
January 8th, 2008 at 1:06 am
#5 Citric: That must be what happened to John in FOOB.
huntingbyrd
January 8th, 2008 at 1:21 am
Pluggers is so mean today.
huntingbyrd
January 8th, 2008 at 1:24 am
Oh yeah and Congrats to all runners up and Rhekarid.
Rainbird
January 8th, 2008 at 1:26 am
Phantom Tuesday Wow, a new character. Oh wait, is that Colonel Sanders? I guess he isn’t dead. Sort of like Walt Disney, but brought back to life.
Cool.
Godzooky
January 8th, 2008 at 1:26 am
S-M: If only Peter had some spider-like ability to leap or to shoot out a web and swing ahead of the fleeing Persuader. Heck, if only he had two functional legs that would enable him to chase and possibly catch up to a hulking felon who won’t be winning track meets anytime soon. Fortunately, Peter’s patheticness has not affected his ability to wield the Vera Shields fist-shake of fury.
Rainbird
January 8th, 2008 at 1:27 am
Oh, and congrats to the COTW. And PeteMoss, you just made it in. I loved what you said.
Poteet
January 8th, 2008 at 1:29 am
Yay Rhekarid! Congrats to you and the other merry hilarious floaters!
huntingbyrd
January 8th, 2008 at 1:33 am
#8 bats :[
todays FOOB was really stupid and i’m guessing there will be more John-is-an-asshole stripps.
WHY DOESN’T LYNN STOP WRITING THE STRIP?? i don’t know!? When should we stop this pointless strip taking up useless space in the no longer comics section….? Never HAHA!
Poteet
January 8th, 2008 at 1:35 am
1/8
MW — Chester looks as if he’s about to expire in that last panel. Maybe Mary grabbed something out of her medicine cabinet and made sure that if she couldn’t have him, nobody would.
RMMD — I love Niki’s new Young Hitler look in the last panel.
Foob — Geez, what an obnoxious interaction! I’m beginning to think the years when I thought I liked this strip were a prolonged hallucination.
Bobdog
January 8th, 2008 at 1:41 am
A3G – Alan could use some ‘fun,’ by which he means ‘alcohol.’ At the rate the strip is progressing, they should be ringing in the new year by mid-March.
True Fable
January 8th, 2008 at 1:47 am
Lots of superheroes today!
A3G It’s Yo-Yo Emotion Man!
Archie The coach must be pretty hard up for runners if Archie, the Boy with the Rod up his Ass is impressive to him.
Cathy (Must Die) And Irving (Must Shut Up or Do the Same) as Gimme Grab, the Rubber Armed Man!
DtM The Marines would have made hamburger out of Boy Menace by now, darlin’.
FBoFW Guess we know why Elly looks so bad now, if John used to rag her over nothing back then. It’s the Douchebag, Canada’s brand of hero. Not just a heroid – a hemorrhoid!
FW Look, it’s one of Mopey Pete’s comic book heroes – LightBulb Head!
(DT)GT Yeah kid, it’s imperitive that you have no idea what is going on in the game or what you have done or could do to contribute to winning the game. Just be as confused as a Gil Thorp reader, that’ll do.
H&L Lois? See if “Pattersons” are on the list and if they are, add on another ten years.
JP It’s not too late to call in sick or late, Sam. Dickweed. No, your superhero name is Blue Ball.
Luann I don’t know who is pettier, but it sure isn’t pretty. You’re both the girl even the villain doesn’t want.
MT Rather than numb my poor mind with the idea that Sam Not Sam Hill went bad, I’ll just admire the Ginormous Tortoise that is patroling their cabin in the center panel.
MW Okay, what’s his story? Is he a drunk? A brute? A cradle-robber? A professor? A psychic? A stalker? He’s got to be someone with a Past or he wouldn’t show up in Charterstoneland. He’s… Pwner!
RMMD The Mushroom is Down, I repeat: The Mushroom is DOWN! Oddly, I prefer both Rex and Niki with wet hair plastering their skulls. They look less like Kip’s Big Boy and Starfish Boy this way.
S-M You know, with all the accidental super-heroes in today’s strips, the one strip about a super hero is the lamest one of them all.
Uncle Lumpy
January 8th, 2008 at 1:51 am
Crankshaft — OK, Friday was, “Gosh, it seems people die and then somehow they’re not around anymore”, and Tuesday is a guy building a snowman while smoking and sneering at his cardiac stress test.
In a Tom Batiuk comic strip.
Fella, you have chosen poorly.
That said, anybody know who the hell he is? Do we care about him? I thought not.
Uncle Lumpy
January 8th, 2008 at 1:56 am
And Curtis continues the Kwanzaa tradition with a new kind of nuts: Diane asserts, “It’s important to be exposed to the works of those who are routinely ignored”, and instantly joins their ranks!
That said, can you imagine the volume of crap you would read if your criterion was “if it’s routinely ignored, I gotta gotta have it”? I mean, comic strips alone . . . .
Bobdog
January 8th, 2008 at 2:01 am
Pluggers 01/05/08 – Pluggers have to spend their “Golden Years” working in mega-chain stored to supplement their retirement income!
Pluggers 01/07/08 – Pluggers are morbidly obese!
Pluggers 01/08/08 – Pluggers’ are are watching everyone they know die!
I was originally under the impression that “Plugger” was a sort of term of endearment and the point of the strip was for aging working-class folk to commune about their common ailments and idiosyncrasies — but I think the author has become jaded and now loathes these “Pluggers” — perhaps his income from his syndicated strip has allowed him to move up the socio-economic ladder to the point where he has forgotten his roots. Or maybe the pressure to meet the constant deadlines of a comic that runs daily has crushed his soul to the point where he must lash out at those who he now sees as the source of his constant torment.
In any case, I expect we’ll start seeing future installments where the Pluggers start to have targets and gun sight markers drawn over them as they are subject to increasingly bizzare Dante-esque horrors. Before Brookins finally snaps, we’ll probably have panels that read nothing but “Die Plugger! Die!” scrawled over and over again in a manic frenzy.
Spotted HØrse
January 8th, 2008 at 2:24 am
Congratulations Rhekarid, and to the creative folks here at the CC! Float on, people!
#26 Unca Lumpy: Dude is Keesterman, whose mailbox Shaft ritually flattens, year in and year out. I suspect this bit of whimsy is something Batiuk can’t afford to jettison, no matter how much he wants to waste Keesterman. Bet it’s leading up to a very special series!
Les
January 8th, 2008 at 2:26 am
#7: TrueFable
Your letters to FOOB are alarming. I can only imagine what it must be like to receive threats of sexual assault in your inbox from some crazed anti-fan. That women who are prominent in any field probably also receive such threats of violence is even more sobering. I’m thinking of a prominent CS blogger who got such hate on the internet that she quit doing public speaking. Frankly, I’m surprised that Josh tolerates your hate. Snarking is one thing, but “suffer bitch” is another.
You should knock it the fuck off. You’re coming off as a creepy asshole.
TB Tabby
January 8th, 2008 at 2:30 am
9CL: Here’s the proper body language response to anything Thorax says, as demonstrated by Akuma Shogun.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAwQYVWpaG4
Baldo: Yeah, this isn’t Secret Asian Man.
Bizarro: Even the letters in “eip” are out of order!
FC: Only if it’s the kind I toss whenever I read one of your “cute” lines.
Luann: Your word for the day is “schadenfreude.”
Godzooky
January 8th, 2008 at 2:49 am
FOOB: Hey, John, if you think Elly’s butt is getting “rotund,” wait till you see what’s gonna happen to her nose.
Mibbitmaker
January 8th, 2008 at 3:46 am
Tuesday:
FC: Except the cookie in question will be a peanut butter cookie, rendering the idea too redundant.
A3G: Wheeeeee.
Adam: Adam is now officially a Patterson.
GT: FonzieSquiggy: “But, Coach, I love me. I love me sooooooo much! You see the “M” on my top? That stands for ‘Me’!”
A3G (again): Yeah, Alan, you could use some fun. And you’re already about as much fun as being endlessly critiqued by Corporal Yo.
Curtis:
Curtis’ mom: “It’s important to be exposed to those whose works are routinely IGNORED!”
Curtis: “Mom… w-why did you sound like G-G-Glenn Close from ‘Fatal Attraction’ j-j-just now?”
RwO: Now That’s how you should do your Sunday strips, Mark Trail!
S-M: One more panel would make this the funniest Spider-Man strip ever: a brick falling “klonk” on his head.
FW: (Psst!… please, nobody tell Bull that I’m an indy reader that resents superheroes. Thanks, guys.)
Joe Btfsplk
January 8th, 2008 at 4:00 am
Chron strips seem to be working OK for me again, for the moment anyway. Jan. 8 strips:
Mark Trail – Has it ever been winter anywhere in the MT world? I can’t remember.
Popeye – You know, Pop, the kid does sort of have a point.
Spider-Man – So. Rendered helpless by yet another falling object. C’mon, even when “groggy” you should be able to run with the speed of a human, for cryin’ out loud. Go after him, you putz. You are the most ineffectual superhero ever. I must have missed the episode where you were stung by a radioactive jellyfish.
Family Circus – Are we supposed to know whom Jeffy is quoting here? Mix in the lame phoned-in cutesy non-joke and the awkwardly split balloon/caption dialog, and this panel reaches some kind of new pinnacle of annoyingness.
Mary Worth – Bark bye-bye, busybody biddie’s beagle buddy.
Blondie – Holy crap.
Lockhorns – Leroy, it’s not like Loretta isn’t eating the same thing as you are. And I’m sure she wouldn’t stop you from making your own dinner once in a while.
Brown-eyed Girl
January 8th, 2008 at 4:28 am
29. Les: I understand that you find True Fable’s letters to Lynn creepy and hateful, but please understand that he doesn’t actually send them to her. They are a running joke on this site about Lynn’s unrequited passion for him. His messages to Coffee Talk are candid about things he dislikes about FOOB, but they are not personally insulting or threatening.
Jym
January 8th, 2008 at 4:56 am
=v= MT (Mariko): Or cigar-illo?
=v= Curtis (rhymes with puck): The story actually reminded me of an Irish folk tale, but instead of a Buffalo the hide was of a seal (silke). This tale was incorporated into the movie, The Legend of Roan Inish.
=15= Pluggers (huntingbyrd): You’re a Plugger if you outlive your acquaintances? Oy vey.
=22= FBoFW (Poteet) : I have also noticed how some of these “classic” “insights” converge on the vapidity of Cathy. Unlike Guisewhite, though, Johnston could actually draw. I think that fooled me to some extent in my younger days. :-|
True Fable
January 8th, 2008 at 6:19 am
# 29 Les – Let me assure you that my “Lynnie Baby” letters NEVER get sent to Ms. Johnston. Good heavens, I would NEVER send her something so horrible as those, are you kidding?!
They started about a year ago and are fairly regular, so I imagine you haven’t been around long enough to see they’re only a form of snark.
I do send her letters in Coffee Talk, but rest assured I do not cross the line even close to the Lynnie Babys. I try to make the CT letters constructive critiques rather than just plain gripes. I’m not a total asshat.
Anyway, anyone who actually thinks I have a Red Hot Fable Body needs to inquire about the swampland I have for sale. It’s good prime property and I probably know the guy who owns it. ;-)
gleeb
January 8th, 2008 at 6:47 am
A3G: Whoa, for a second there, Alan forgot that he’s a bitter jackass.
’shaft: “To heck with the stress test”? Oh, I get it, he longs for the cold, icy hand of death. Not surprising, but will Batiuk, his cruel puppet-master, refuse him?
Dick: “Whoever might have forged the papers did a perfect job”? Or maybe they’re genuine. Oh, right; Tracy’s already throwing around wild accusations. Gotta support him.
FC: There’s always the guy who wants to substitute a pork chop for his baked potato.
FBoFW: And no justice in the little redacted who grab onto those handles, eh Johnston? Stop, you’re embarrassing yourself.
‘bean: Ooh, a comic-book movie. Will is merely stink, or will it suck hard?
GA: This looks like a job for Don Knotts, USPS, the Great White Lettercarrier!
MW: That woman in pink’s twin sister, in blue, is also walking her energetic dog.
Phantom: Still no graffiti, but it’s still just two people remarking on Christopher Lee’s arrival home.
Prickly: Well, if you drew better, we could tell it wasn’t a cat.
Little Guy
January 8th, 2008 at 7:17 am
JP: Proof that Sam is a blue-ball:
1) Abbey can walk
2) Abbey isn’t complaining why her {body part} is so sore.
I definitely think JP has replaced FOOB as my “I still read it, even though my reaction is the same every frickin’ day!” strip.
And congrats to to COTWers. It’s harder to join than the Baseball Hall of Fame.
Gagott68
January 8th, 2008 at 7:19 am
S-M: So he can’t even hit a huge slow moving lug. I would think he could hit him randomly. And if it’s true that he can’t even run after “The Persuader”, maybe he’s been paralyzed. It will be interesting to see how he swings from a web in a wheelchair. Perhaps he can get a sidekick. Maybe one-legged Bill from Thorpe.
GT: Speaking of Thorpe…as ineffective a superhero as Spider-Man is, Gil is equally as ineffective as a coach. He waits until halftime to address Spit Curl-Boy chuck and duck strategy? Not to mention the fact that Gil has apparently been unable to instill the basic concept of “teamwork” in the kid. At least the girls’ squad knows the word.
MT: Are we supposed to feel sympathy for this murderous mope? They’re sure spending alot of time lingering at his deathbed bemoaning his lost love. Nevermind Bull’s lost life. Maybe Mark’s Right Fist o’ Justice can punch the cancer out of Luke’s head. Of course, Luke does have a moustache (though not as punchable as Johnny’s) and Luke’s minion has an infinitely punchable scruff-face.
smacky
January 8th, 2008 at 7:39 am
RMMD: Today Niki has his first inkling that there is no criminal chasing them, that this has been an elaborate ruse to get a teenage boy in a wet T-shirt into the woods alone.
Hubris
January 8th, 2008 at 8:01 am
Sweet! Congrats Rhekarid, that’s damn funny.
jayjaybear
January 8th, 2008 at 8:01 am
In a development of absolutely no relation to any plotline (or pseudoplotline) in today’s comic page, I just got a spam email from “Luann Magee”!
I want to be a fly on the wall when Margo hears about that one…
AhClem
January 8th, 2008 at 8:06 am
JP – Sam, Sam, Sam. How obvious does Abbey need to be before you catch a damn clue? With the robe falling off her shoulder and her heaving alabaster bosom in plain view, all you can think about is office matters? If you are unwilling or unable to take care of her desires, step aside for someone who can (Hey! Stop shoving! I was here first, you bastards!).
Crankshaft – Looks like Keesterman is about to meet Batuik’s icy pen of doom. (It that actually Keesterman, or his twin brother, Forrest Shadowing?)
Whippersnapper
January 8th, 2008 at 8:28 am
FW: I kept wondering, why all the emphasis on Mopey Pete? And now I understand- Mopey Pete is Batiuk. We get it already, Batiuk. You’re a great, big, mopey success, and no one else from your town has succeeded at anything, except possibly dying from cancer. You’re way better than all of those people from your long ago high school days, who barely remember you. Can we move on now?
Tamex
January 8th, 2008 at 8:30 am
#22 Poteet: I really don’t think that FBOFW came into its prime until the 1990’s. Of course, I didn’t read the daily strips until then because I lived in a small town whose paper only carried Sunday FBOFW. However, as far as I can tell, I have missed of the very memorable storylines (April’s birth, Farley’s death, Lawrence coming out, etc.)
Here’s how bad it was–Michael was the most interesting character back when I started reading, probably because he is the oldest child and he is about my age. It was only when Liz went to college and dumped Anthony that I started following her character and I really felt that I was a “big fan” of the strip.
What I like about the old strips that I have seen is that I can see now that Lynn was not afraid to make the oldest child look like a total brat, because, let’s face it, some kids just are. Elly is certainly flawed as well, even if it’s just in her own mind. However, today, such honesty in portrayal just invites internet snark. Strange how today we are all expected to be psychologically perfect.
I don’t like FOOB as it stands today, and I don’t like how Lynn seems to be using the old strips to villify her ex-husband, but I think we do tend to be a bit too hard on the old strips. FBOFW was a strip about an average white middle-class family, and there are many people, including myself, who came from such a background and who identify with the old strips just a little bit (or a lot).
True Fable
January 8th, 2008 at 8:37 am
# 43 Ah Clem – Sorry about the shove, man, but you DID say something about someone willing to take care of the delectable Abbey Spencer’s desires, and I’m quick to step up to volunteer for something like that. :-)
AhClem
January 8th, 2008 at 8:42 am
SM – The last panel in today’s Spiderman reminds me of the Black Knight scene in “Monty Python’s Holy Grail”, but without the good writing, acting or humor.
“Running away, eh? You yellow bastards! Come back here and take what’s coming to you. I’ll bite your legs off!
Tracer Bullet
January 8th, 2008 at 8:42 am
I give up. Sam Driver is gay, gay, gay. He’s so gay, even RuPaul thinks he should dial it down a little bit. He’s so gay, Liberace looks at him and says, “Damn! He is gay.” He’s so gay, the local leather bar changed it’s name to “Sam Driver.” He’s so gay, Liza Minelli just asked him get married.
Calico
January 8th, 2008 at 8:47 am
#4 – Plus tuna casserole and lovely potatoes!
Congrats to all!
Godzooky
January 8th, 2008 at 9:00 am
Re: True Fables’ Hey Lynnie letters: To me, besides that they’re only posted here and aren’t meant to be taken seriously, they’re directed to a fictional Lynn Johnston. In a way, they’re symbolic. Through his writing, True has established a caricature of Ms. Johnston whose creativity has long since withered, but lusts after the wealth of it embodied by the True Fable (also a fictional persona). However, disgusted at her betrayal of creative potential (i.e., “surge in glurge”), he rejects her advances at every turn. (Where’s SecretMargo and his literary analysis when you need him? Well, I tried.)
Little Guy
January 8th, 2008 at 9:06 am
48: Early candidate for COTW.
Even a certain couch-jumping movie star thinks Sam is gay.
Sheilagh
January 8th, 2008 at 9:14 am
Thank you thank you thank you for acknowledging rhymes with puck in the COTW lineup! That one stood out for me — I was going to shake my finger at you if you didn’t pick it.
rhymes, I will do my VERY BEST to apply that lesson to my life, but I bet I never.
Sheilagh
January 8th, 2008 at 9:16 am
BTW, who has access to the Curtis archives? I seem to recall THE EXACT SAME STRIP the day after last year’s Kwanzaa Extravaganzaa — Mom trying to push a book on him and him bolting. Can anyone confirm?
Tweeks_Coffee
January 8th, 2008 at 9:16 am
A3G: Today, on a very special Apartment 3G: Alan battles his crippling Bi-Polar Disorder.
Archie: Wasn’t Archie already on the track team? I seem to recall an incident where he stomped on a puppy while chasing Betty’s head.
DtM: My word, why are the teacher’s eyes so huge? It looks like she’s been dropping acid in the closet all day.
DT: Why, it’s almost like he acquired it legitimately. It’s a good thing they have the nation’s top detective there to figure this mystery out.
GT: Sweet merciful crap! That guy’s a freaking superstar! I mean, he’s dunking the ball and he’s completely even with the hoop. Give it up Gil, there’s no way you could take down the second incarnation of Michael Jordan.
MF: What?
Pluggers: So…my Grandfather is plugger just because he’s 90? If ever there was an argument for smoking, this is it.
Preteena: “She hits like a guy too.” I wonder what else she does like a guy…
RMMD: “We have to make sure to share body heat too. After all, we don’t want you getting hypothermia.” I’m sure this is all a thrill for Niki too. Being a Katrina survivor and all, he’s never had to deal with anything like slogging through mud and water while trying to avoid being shot.
S-M: If only he could, and I know this sounds crazy, adjust his webbing so that it had a wider spray. Alas, poor Spidey had to let the guy lumber away.
TDIET: This was submitted by “Rusty & Art”? Hmmm, makes you wonder exactly what the submission letter for this one looked like.
Ziggy: I read that sentence five times and it still makes no sense.
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
January 8th, 2008 at 9:20 am
Today, I step aside to offer my usual snarking space to Guest Snarker: The Ghost of William Shakespeare!
A3G: Blow, blow, thou winter wind! Thou art not so unkind as man’s ingratitude.
Cathy: Small things make base men proud.
C’Shaft: Lord, what fools these mortals be!
(WT)DT: It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.
FC: How sharper than a serpent’s tooth it is to have a thankless child!
GT: Though this be madness, yet there is method in ‘t.
JP: See, how she leans her cheek upon her hand! O that I were a glove upon that hand, that I might touch that cheek!
Luann: Look like the innocent flower, but be the serpent under ‘t.
MW: What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.
Pluggers: Of all the wonders that I yet have heard, it seems to me most strange that men should fear; Seeing that death, a necessary end, will come when it will come.
RMMD: The better part of valour is discretion.
S-M: Cowards die many times before their deaths; The valiant never taste of death but once.
ChattyGenes
January 8th, 2008 at 9:24 am
#55 Spider Brick. Brilliant! And so much fun to read!
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
January 8th, 2008 at 9:26 am
#54, re Ziggy: Yeah, that seems weird to me, too. Is it a regional thing? I don’t say it.
I think it probably means “Contrary to your claim, I maintain you were not abducted by a UFO!”
It might be the counterpart to something that does exist in my dialect: saying “I was too!” or “I was so!” in response to a claim that you didn’t do something. In other words, perhaps the following are parallel:
“You weren’t abducted by a UFO.” “I was too!”
“I was abducted by a UFO.” “You weren’t either!”
Can anyone confirm?
Darkefang
January 8th, 2008 at 9:32 am
A3G: It was charming when Han Solo did it. When Alan does? Not so much.
Crock: I’ve been reading Crock every day for eight months and I have no clue who the characters are, their roles in the strip, or what the basic premise of the strip is supposed to be. Those are all the signposts of really good writing.
DtM: Maybe Dennis really is menacing, with the good parts edited out to bring it down to a PG rating. Dennis’ crude drawing of his teacher is annoying at worst, but his teacher’s permanently fixed gaze of wide-eyed horror probably indicates something a thousand times worse is always just out of frame.
DT: Can’t they finish up this discussion somewhere where there aren’t bodies decomposing in the background?
Also, if anything in Dick Tracy made sense, I’d be curious to know how Dick could see the lab tech on his wrist phone, since that guy is clearly talking on a regular cordless telephone.
Foob: Welcome to today’s episode of: “Things No Man Has Ever Said to His Wife.”
FW: It’s been mentioned before, but why exactly is it an insult to Les when one of the students he’s helped mold becomes a success?
GT: Does the kid in panel two have a 40-inch vertical leap, or are they playing on an ice rink with a goal that’s five feet off the ground, next to the giant domino exhibition?
S-M: Oh no, the Persuader’s 15 feet away from me! There’s no way I can catch him now!
Artist formerly known as Ben
January 8th, 2008 at 9:35 am
Ah, my triumphant return to the COTWs. It’s an honor to be in such an August January crowd. Right next to McManx’s Maxicidal fantasy too!
Onto 1/8 comix
Agnes: This made me smile, at least in part because I’ve always thought that “write what you know” was an excuse for lack of curiosity.
MT: Now the scene includes some Lovecraftian turtle-creature with a scrotum for a head. Good thing I didn’t read this last night or I’da never got to sleep.
GA: Barney Fife has taken a leave of absence from the sheriff’s office and is serving the public as a mail carrier. But on seeing a ne’er-do-well (read: paperboy) on the Wallets’ lawn, his old deputy instincts kick in.
9CL: Apparently you need a gerund to kick someone in the nads.
Shoe: Dating in the Army involves getting shot by Tom Berenger? Best to stay celibate.
BB: “The first chapter is all about you”? Does Corporal Yo want to get in on the homoerotic fun?
DT: The handwriting analyst is talking on a cell phone whose signal is being received by a wristwatch. Meanwhile he’s also standing in front of a WW2 era computer the size of a Denny’s. Only in Dick Tracy, folks.
RMMD: Ever hear of pneumonia, Rex? When Lee catches up to you guys you’ll be begging him to finish you off.
Baldo: Baldo’s dad is giving him trash duty because he’s his son. They’re both Latino. So in a sense, Baldo is right.
JP: Steve Shannon and the Sam’s coffee mug are going to be law partners? How delightfully Michael Kuperman!
Blondie: Dithers tosses out the corpse of another minion who has failed him for the last time.
FC: The way Jeffy’s finger is crooked, it looks like he’s been filling up on nose goblins.
Cathy: Never noticed that Irving was built like an orang before. With arms like that, does he ever accidentally step on his own fingers?
Spider-Man: Oh, that happens to all men sometimes.
dreadedcandiru2
January 8th, 2008 at 9:42 am
#58: Darkefang — That’s “Things no man has ever said to his wife and lived“. If there at least one woman on the jury, Elly would walk no problem.
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
January 8th, 2008 at 9:46 am
I’m actually curious: to what extent is today’s FOOB based on real things that Rod used to say to Lynn, and to what extent is it based on Lynn’s own insecurity? Because if it’s the former, it is a pretty assish thing to say.
I mean, I guess we’ll never know, and frankly, I hesitate to veer away from criticism of the strip and toward speculation about Lynn Johnston’s own life, but still, my curiosity is there.
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
January 8th, 2008 at 9:46 am
Rod and/or her other partner whose name I can’t remember, that is
McManx
January 8th, 2008 at 10:05 am
#59 — Nice to share the stage with you too, AFKABen. Great comments this week!
gkl
January 8th, 2008 at 10:09 am
GT: I always thought “one” was the fewest number of dimensions a person could have. Thank you, Andrew Gregory, for proving that there’s a number of dimensions between zero and one.
GA: Proper grammar? Two days in a row? I think I’m getting the vapors! Or, in Gasoline Alley-speak: “Pauper speechifyin’! I’s a-tootin’ in th’ back’erds sin-phonee wit’ dat!”
Niall
January 8th, 2008 at 10:09 am
Tuesday, and I have a cold.
Curtis: I understand the mother’s concern, and agree to it – but the phrasing leaves it wide open to snarking. Because sometimes there are reasons why some authors are routinely ignored, and it’s a question of quality, not persecution…
DtM: THat teacher in the green dress gives me the creeps. She’s more menacing just standing there than Dennis has been in months.
Garfield: Is this a return to the recent bad-style? Though I have to admit, the question is one I had never thought about before…
GT: The Bulldogs have on their roster a giant who need only clench his fist and lift his arm to tip the ball in the basket. How did
MudvilleMilhouseMoriartyWhatever managed to get a lead? Plus, is basketball really a sport where you’re supposed to make so many points that you lose count of them? Why not just have players keep dribbling and basketing in single files on both sides and see who can do it fastest then? You’d have scores in the thousands and really couldn’t tell how many are yours!H&L: Browne is still depressing. There hasn’t been anything to make me even smile in months. Get this man some psychiatric help already!
MT: Uh, so Bull lives about 10 hours from the community? That’s a lot of paddling!
MC: Yay, is this another week of continuity strips? :)
Phantom: Well, I don’t know about action yet, but in panel 2, the characters start rapping. Or something. And somehow, that panel is still more interesting than all of the Kid-Paints-Hero storyline.
Popeye: I stayed on for the weirdness of the ambulatory penises. A naked wet Sweetpea is the last straw, it’s going off my list.
RM: Niki has murder in his eyes. I can’t blame him. He knows just how Rex wants to wait for first light. “You know, Niki, in order to conserve body heat, we’ll have to…”
TDIET: Oh my, this one’s a winner! Gentleman Caller! Comics being read! Western on the telly! Daughter speaking at the phone instead of in it! And quite interestingly for Scaduto’s own gentlemanly values (which aren’t necessarily bad values at all, considering the class he exhibited) it has the concept that a widow past the age of 40 still has a chance at second love.
yesterthread 182. Meanwhile: thanks for the response to my question about how syndicates keep creators informed of additions/drops in readership.
Dean Booth
January 8th, 2008 at 10:29 am
Judging by his album cover, I guess Freddie Gage was a Plugger.
…and congrats to the COTWers! Great stuff.
Niall
January 8th, 2008 at 10:42 am
Congrats to all the COTW winners! (They’re all winners in my book.) Some spectacularly funny stuff up there. Stupendous Girl’s Reeky essay and AfkaBen’s reply to Hubris are personal favourites.
11. Frank Parsnip: did the RM hypothermia avoidance first and better than me. :)
53. Sheilagh: Although I’ve only been reading Curtis semi-regularly for a few months, I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s a near-exact riff after each Kwanzaa storyline. After all, Josh complained last September about the “return to class” strip being almost exactly the same year after year and only changing the dialogue in the last panel. I figure something similar is at work here. I believe the term is “recurring motif”?
54. Tweeks: also did the hypothermia better than me. Why do I even try? :)
55. Spider-Brick: Many guffaws! Especially at DT. Perfect.
54 Tweeks, 57 Skullturf, on Ziggy: no, no, it wasn’t that either. I suspect the cat’s trying to look like it has a bad excuse for coming in late, and Ziggy turns down all the ones he can think of. So Ziggy’s the wife and the cat is his husband. What? I… arrrgh my brain hurts
58. Darkefang: Crock is about the French Foreign legion in the desert. It used to be a staple of several strips, but it’s rather passé now, and the references lost on nearly everyone.
commodorejohn
January 8th, 2008 at 10:49 am
A3G – “We’re going to go have fun, goddammit, because I could sure use some! GRARGH!”
Curtis – Yeah, it’s high time someone broke the silence on the blacklisting of African-American authors, isn’t it?
DTM – AHHH WHAT ARE THESE THINGS AHHH
DT – ENOUGH ALREADY
FOOB – Whine, whine, gripe, bitch, moan. I’m beginning to suspect that I was right all along and FOOB was never good in the first place.
FW – Oh hooray, more humiliation of Les! If it weren’t for the whole lusting-after-his-own-daughter thing, I’d almost feel sorry for the guy.
GA – What’s with Realdoll Don Knotts here? Is this a walk-on cameo from Gil Thorp?
JP – Hoo!
Luann – Great, as if we didn’t hate everybody in this strip enough.
MT – Gamera!
RMMD – Wow, could Rex possibly get any stupider?
SM – “Yeah, I failed again, but next time for sure!“
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
January 8th, 2008 at 10:56 am
#67 Niall — a likely hypothesis about the language in Ziggy, and simpler than mine. In that case, it’s still something I’d never say, but perhaps the difference is just word order.
If I worked in a supermarket and somebody kept asking for cheeses that we don’t have, I might say “We don’t have Emmenthal” and then “We don’t have Jarlsberg either”. But I would never say “We don’t either have Jarlsberg”. However, is that sentence unremarkable for some of you? I’m genuinely curious.
Keg of Curd
January 8th, 2008 at 10:57 am
#55 – SSB – With regard to Luann it might be in the present instance more accurately phrased as “Look like a crudely-drawn flower, but be the — something indistinguishable, probably an invertebrate — under ‘t.”
Jamus The Bartender
January 8th, 2008 at 10:57 am
36. As long as Fable is getting that off his chest, I think I should bring up that I don’t really have mind-blowing sex with the sticky-fingers comic strip kitty from Slylock Fox, who then proceeds to steal my stuff to sell it for cocaine.
Tweeks_Coffee
January 8th, 2008 at 11:05 am
#67, 69 – Niall/Skullturf: Yeah, I guess that’s what they’re trying to say. it’s just so oddly phrased, though. I can’t fathom what would bring someone to commit such crimes against the English language. Hell, even Snuffy Smith has better grammar than this abomination.
gh
January 8th, 2008 at 11:06 am
CongratulationstotheCOTWwinnerandrunnersup!
And, while I’ve got the floor, I was out “sick” from “work” yesterday and was not able to give Bob Weber, Jr. his proper due for Sunday’s SlyFox. I’m sure it was said, but even if so it bears repeating: Cassandra Cat in a bathrobe AND two fish skeletons, one of them SMILING? Verily, I swoon!
You may continue.
gh
January 8th, 2008 at 11:37 am
#69, etc. Skullturf Q. Beavispants –
It doesn’t sound remarkable to my ear, but it does sound juvenile for some reason. Like:
“Bobby’s got a girrrrlfriend!”
“Nuh-uh! I don’t EITHER! Shut up, stupidhead!”
So maybe it’s playground dialect.
Uncle Lumpy
January 8th, 2008 at 11:47 am
#69 SQB –
Not just remarkable, but remarkably wrong! “Either” can apply to a verb phrase — “We will either go to the park or pop some delicious corn” — but that’s not what’s happening here. “We don’t have (Emmenthal or) Jarlsberg either” sounds right for a reason.
Uncle Lumpy
January 8th, 2008 at 11:48 am
#71 Jamus the B. –
Another dream lies in ashes.
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
January 8th, 2008 at 11:52 am
So in conclusion, Ziggy is a hairless pantsless dwarf who talks to his cat in playground dialect.
Zamboni_Rodeo
January 8th, 2008 at 11:53 am
Attention all Chaplin Voting ‘Mudges!
It’s not officially official yet (that is to say, it hasn’t been posted on the website), but my friend got an email yesterday declaring her the FIRST PRIZE WINNER! So she did better than Chaplin did when he entered his own lookalike contest.
So we both thank all of you for helping make it possible.
NightRaven
January 8th, 2008 at 11:59 am
I think the folk-tale in this Kwanzaas’ story is a pretty common one. There’s a Norwegian tale just like it too, only involving sea-cows and (err… was it a poison codfish?.. it’s been a while since I’ve read it..). And shape-shifting tales in general are old, millennia old. And a common trope in shape-shifting is that if you take their “skin”, you can marry them.
I also remember hearing an African tale similar to this once, with the snake and everything, so it’s not a particularly strange tale at all, just different.
Anyway, todays strips:
Curtis: Hmm… “exposed to those works are routinely ignored”.. pretty much what we’re doing here all the time, isn’t it? I’m also kind of wondering if the first couple of strips are the mom hallucinating about Curtis actually appreciating (or even reading) a book, and as she turns away the fantasy is shattered and the cold, harsh reality settles in, punctuated by the blast of music from Curtis’ room.
Dick Tracy: I saw someone questioned the physics involved in broadcasting the guys face onto Dicks’ wrist-watch, but he probably either has a webcam (a two ton monstrosity) somewhere in his giganto computational device, or Tracys watch is really just a radio and the little faces are just photos he’s stapled on.
Garfield: Hmm… Jons inane question has stuck in my head. Great, now I’ll spend the rest of the day trying to bend my tongue in a twist trying to lick it.
Spiderman: Keeps getting knocked out by things. Seems like Spidermans kryptonite is… well.. basically every single object in the universe.
Maybe he got a concussion and maybe a brain hemorrhage from the lamp post, and now he’ll spend the next couple of months complaining about dizziness and head aches, before finally dying on the couch in front of his television. Mary Jane: “It’s how he always wanted to go.” This could actually save this strip from mediocrity!
I know super heroes have been killed before, but always by other super charged villains or some other spectacular event. Spider-man could be the first super hero killed by an ordinary accident!
Rainbird
January 8th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
#61 Skullturf Q. Beavispants I was wondering about that as well, the part of John saying such things.
But then I remembered my dad used to say things like that. “Don’t you think you’re getting a little fat?” To which my mother replied once “I’m working on becoming completely circular.”
Still, I think it is mean, and each time I see her pull up an old strip with John saying such things, the more I wonder why she put up with him for so long.
Paperback Rifler
January 8th, 2008 at 12:07 pm
Congratulations to Rhekarid and all the other CotW honorees!
I myself am going through a CotW drought which the following comments can only serve to prolong:
Pluggers: “You’re a senior plugger if many of the names in your address book are ‘X’d’ out.”
Or you’re a hit man. That one could go either way, really.
Curtis: And the Kwanzaa Kwaziness continues! Today, Curtis transforms himself into musical notes as if by magic! Wow! Perhaps tomorrow, Musical Note Curtis will find himself in deep, deep “treble!” Ha! Or maybe after learning that every good boy does fine, Musical Note Curtis will resolve always to “B sharp!” Ha, ha! Or maybe Musical Note Curtis will return to the barbershop and have his hair arranged into Twelve-Tone Cornrows! HAHAHA . . . ha, ha . . . er . . . Okay, so this has been all downhill since “Kwanzaa Kwaziness.” Oh, well.
Cathy: And today we see what happens when you’ve been emphatically pointing skyward every other day for thirty years, which is that your arms get stretched out to the point at which your limbs are so grossly distorted that you look as though you have orangutan arms. On the plus side, this allows you to wear up to four wristwatch-style devices on each arm without discomfort. On the minus side, your limbs are so grossly distorted that you look as though you have orangutan arms.
Gil Thorpé: I’m not sure whether Gil is about to make a point about selflessness and teamwork, or if he’s about to make a scathing criticism about the sorry state of the Milford Mathematics Department, which had to cut back on teachers and textbooks so that the school could ensure that every game would have a radio broadcast and confetti. As a matter of fact, I suspect that Spitcurl actually scored more than ten points but couldn’t keep an accurate count because he ran out of fingers.
Shoe: What?! Her dates are mostly “platoonic”?! Does that mean she goes out with entire platoons? How the heck does that work? Is rank a factor in determining who gets past first base? Does everyone have to remain in formation during intimate moments? And are those intimate moments executed in a series of quick strikes that target her vulnerable areas with military precision and leave her as a decimated shell with a ravaged infrastructure and a need for even more platoons to maintain a military presence so as to stabilize her region? And why is it that I am writing this about Shoe rather than Beetle Bailey?
Rainbird
January 8th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
77 Skullturf Q. Beavispants This Ziggy dialogue reminds me of the marmaduke dialogue with santa vs the alien. How the heck do either know what the animals are talking about. What drugs are they taking, and will they share?
Flipper
January 8th, 2008 at 12:22 pm
#53 Sheilagh – Curtis often bolts, but he didn’t last year. The setup was exactly the same, with Curtis thanking his mom for recommending the book. She said, “It’s a classic tale written by an African-American author.” Curtis asked, “Why haven’t I heard of it before?” and mom replied, “Because it was written by an African-American author.”
Billingsley doesn’t credit the writer of his Kwanzaa tales, so I assume the ignored African-American writer he’s referring to is himself. That must be why it’s a Curtis tradition to end the Kwanzaa celebration with a hefty dollop of bitterness.
Brick Bradford
January 8th, 2008 at 12:22 pm
FOOB–this flashback helps to explain the long gap between the arrival of Lizardbreath and the conception of Apwil.
Dick Tracy–I wonder why Dick doesn’t just put a couple of hollow points in the governor’s medulla–like in the good old days?
Niall
January 8th, 2008 at 12:23 pm
Skullturf: good analysis for getting “playground dialect” for Ziggy. WHat that says either about the character or the cartoonist is something else entirely.
78. Zamboni Rodeo: congratulations to your friend!! I couldn’t vote, but I’m glad she got what seems a fitting tribute, from what others said.
79. Nightraven: I think what I and a few others object a little is not the tale itself, but the wy it was mishandled in the end, leaving an abrupt transition in the narration that was completely unsupported by anything else (he stopped stealing suddenly? Why?) and left us without anything resembling a moral – and if there’s one thing those old folktales have, it’s definitely a moral!
And no, what we’re doing here is getting exposed to those works which should be ignored, more often than not. :)
81. Paperback Rifley on Shoe: at first I thought you were going on about a typo, but no, no, you’re entirely correct about the subtext clearly hinted at. *shudder*
Without checking today’s Foob, just going by the comments… may it be that a number of these old strips were appreciated, but in their previous social and time context? I.e. that they’re now somewhat dated and missing the newness of what they did at the time? Not that long ago I had the chance to watch an old episode of a semi-popular CBC fantastical sitcom from the early 80s, called Seeing Things (this quite chumpy guy with brush mustache has visions and has to try to stop murders and atrocities from happening). There was a disclaimer before the rebroadcast, saying that the social context allowed certain character interactions which today are viewed differently, viewer discretion is advised. WHat it was, was that the guy and his wife routinely hurled invective and abuse at each other; domestic “violence” (occasional object thrown) included. This would never be done today, but at the time, it was acceptable context. I’m wondering if some of this crucial element is missing in being able to enjoy even older Foobs?..
(Or, more succintly: sometimes when we’re younger we forgive annoying behaviour, and are much less likely to appreciate it, like it or tolerate it older?)
lylebot
January 8th, 2008 at 12:32 pm
Today’s Preteena is kind of disturbing. It appears that that guy just stood there grinning stupidly while she punched him in the face repeatedly, with enough force to knock a tooth out, and then gouged out his eye.
By the way, is it just me, or does preteena’s dad (I think that’s who the goateed guy is) look like he’s about 25?
gh
January 8th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
#77 Skullturf Q. Beavispants –
Clearly a niche market.
lesles
January 8th, 2008 at 12:39 pm
#79 NightRaven: before finally dying on the couch in front of his television. Mary Jane: “It’s how he always wanted to go.”
that is just beautiful. and your scenario would pretty much redeem all the degeneration and shonkiness of the spider-man newspaper strips. i can even see the last panel.
what would make this totally awesome would be if this somehow turned up over at shortpacked. you got the skillz, willis, you know you are our last best hope. you could even have spider-man’s corpse discovered by batman. “i’m batman. he’s dead.”
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
January 8th, 2008 at 12:47 pm
Today’s Archie provides more proof that the strip is written by a robot. No organism familiar with the way humans run would depict a runner in such a manner, leaning backwards like that. Archie runs like the freakin’ Keep On Truckin guys.
AhClem
January 8th, 2008 at 12:51 pm
#79 NightRaven -
I can see the superhero obituaries now:
Superman – Died of kryptonite poisoning after saving the earth from nuclear annihilation.
Batman – Died from smoke inhalation after saving 43 people from a burning skyscraper.
Spiderman – Died from an infected toenail while watching Dr. Phil.
PeteMoss
January 8th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
Ha ha! You guys are great! Very funny. Congrats to Rhekarid!
My personal favorites are rhymes with puck & Stupendous Girl. Very twisted yet intuitive comments.
Zamboni_Rodeo
January 8th, 2008 at 1:28 pm
FOOB: Man, oh man do I want to give this strip a good smack.
GA: Interesting casting choice using Don Knotts as Barney Fife in the role of the postman today.
GT: Even by Gil Thorp standards, The A-Train’s head is way too freakishly big for his body.
TDIET: “Rusty and Art” hail from my home city. I wonder if they’re the kids who always go out and only stay in when mom has a gentleman caller?
Toronto
January 8th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
35: “You’re a Plugger if you outlive your acquaintances?”
Yes, and if you don’t, you’re a Pluggee.
Al
January 8th, 2008 at 2:04 pm
25 — Keesterman and his mailboxes o’ shame rule!
26 — Yea, you could end up reading a Mike Patterson novel for Kwanzaa. Wouldn’t want that…
gh
January 8th, 2008 at 2:10 pm
– Major Looke, Comics As a Diversionary Tactic
For example:
A3G: “Let’s go to Blaze’s“ = If we stay together, we’ll burn in Hell.
Curtis: Look at those hands. Clearly, she’d like to strangle him and be done with it.
(WT)DT: Geometric configuration top left and center clearly spell out 007. We all know Dick Tracy is licensed to kill.
I?GT: Is that the outline of a crowd blocking the exit? Or flames? Either way, reader, you’re screwed. [See Sartre.]
JP: HOLY SATURN! Move along folks, nothing subliminal here. Wait. I can’t quite see that barn door in the background, but I assume it’s closed.
gh
January 8th, 2008 at 2:15 pm
#81 Paperback Rifler –
Sadder still, he’s only holding up one hand to show “this many.”
Joe
January 8th, 2008 at 2:16 pm
FOOB: So………..how many days of “John (Rod) is an Asshole” strips do you think we’ll see? Any takers?
Vice-Pope Chris
January 8th, 2008 at 2:27 pm
#65 Niall — quality authors get ignored…because 90% of the time, what is considered a “quality author” is too durn boring to read (ie, all of Oprah’s infamous Book List). Gimme a non-quality author who tells a ripping good tale, anyday.
Niall
January 8th, 2008 at 2:56 pm
93. Toronto:
No, no – you’re a Plugged.
gh
January 8th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
NYCC: Are you ready for your colonoscopy, Mr. Phillips?
Stupendous Girl
January 8th, 2008 at 3:12 pm
Yay, congrats to this week’s winner(s)!! :)
I can’t believe I made it! I made Josh laugh. I can die happy now. ^___^
Niall
January 8th, 2008 at 3:25 pm
You made a lot of us laugh, Stupendous Girl. :)
Oh, for those who were waiting, Reynard Noir posted his take on the Cassandra in Bathrobe Sunday comic which is nothing short of awesome. (He’s still on vacation, so I’m spreading the word…)
Gagott68
January 8th, 2008 at 3:39 pm
54 Tweeks: The kid in panel 2 of GT isn’t Milford’s Spit Curl Kid. Whoever he is, he certainly got hops though.
Little Guy
January 8th, 2008 at 3:50 pm
Luann: Love it or hate it, when it comes to Tiffany and her misdeeds, Greg Evans remembers the Continuity Chapter in Cartoonist School.
Sans Sense
January 8th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
NYCC: Why yes, I am told it stings a little.
PeteMoss
January 8th, 2008 at 4:32 pm
69# Skullturf Q. Beavispants
Your supermarket has neither Emmenthal nor Jarlsberg? Do you have Prince Albert in a can? Do you have pigs’ knuckles or crab legs? is your freezer case running?
Loopina
January 8th, 2008 at 4:37 pm
#53: Well, I’ll be darned. In a couple of the post-Kwanzaa hangover strips, it appears that the story we’ve just read is one that Curtis has also just read. I wonder if the book in the drawer is the same one every year, or if she just saves it for next year?
http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20070109&name=Curtis
http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20060111&name=Curtis
http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20050108&name=Curtis
Rob
January 8th, 2008 at 4:38 pm
Ziggy is pure evil genius they know that if they make it confusing enough people will be distracted from the fact that its just not funny.
Allie Cat
January 8th, 2008 at 4:59 pm
MW – How old do we think Thomas is? He could be 18 or he could be 45 – that’s how good the art is.
What I’m specifically wondering is – it this Thomas fellow into horseback riding? Could he be a new possible suitor for Dawn or Vera?
Or is he going to quietly wander off with his dog while we get a panel that says “Meanwhile, at Charterstone…” and shows a new kooky neighbor moving in to benefit from Mary Worth’s charm and casseroles?
Also – have I mentioned I really hate the old FOOB. I agree that it’s unfair that men can age and gain weight with less scrutiny than women – but SFW? There are a lot of unfairnesses in life. Get over it. I love that most of this week’s FOOB Coffee Talk letters have been bashing Lynn for making Elly such a whiny frump.
Also – This week’s PBSes remind me of an old Far Side of a shark, covered in remoras looking in the mirror – the caption reading “The Heartbreak of Remoras”
Which brings up an interesting point. In my family. we’re all huge fans of Far Side- I have the mega two volume compilation. But we can remember old ones, describe them to each other – and they still make us laugh. I may have stored in my brain 30 or 40 Far Sides – and that’s a low estimate.
Now to me, that’s an effective use of humor. And it’s rare to find. Can you remember 40 Marvins? Other than 40 that all involve him shitting himself?
bats :[
January 8th, 2008 at 5:05 pm
107. Loopina: at least his mom keeps his baseball cap nice and clean.
ChattyGenes
January 8th, 2008 at 5:06 pm
#85 Niall
“Without checking today’s Foob, just going by the comments… may it be that a number of these old strips were appreciated, but in their previous social and time context? I.e. that they’re now somewhat dated and missing the newness of what they did at the time?”
I think you’ve put your finger on something I’ve been puzzled about for a while now. I’m a big former Foob fan, and have all the books. Just before the hybrid began, I re-read a few of the early ones, and–yes–I did enjoy them again, and they brought back memories of when I laughed at them and read them aloud to my kids.
However, ever since those very same strips have been re-appearing, I’ve felt differently about them. At first I thought that it must be because Mudgie snark was now ruining them for me, but then I realized that wasn’t the problem. I think it has more to do with what you wrote above. The strips WERE new when I first read them, and at the time my kids and I were about the ages of Lynn and her characters. It made a difference. When I sort of travel back in time, meaning “sit down and read an entire book collection at once”–I sort of get back into the person I once was. And I’m a lot more forgiving and willing to laugh than when I see the isolated, reprinted strips.
Another comment on former Foob fans: I think that what people have experienced in their own lives can color their present-day opinions of the early strips. I have a friend back home who used to be a FBOFW fan back in the day (about when I was). She and I both had kids, but her life took a different turn from mine, and she is now divorced. Today when she reads the early strips (as well as the current ones–in which Michael Patterson holds the role John used to) I think she sees all the bullshit that she used to put up with from her husband, which she perhaps didn’t realize was bullshit at the time, since she was trying to make the best of things, get along with him, and make the marriage work. She’s now the biggest FOOB anti-fan that I know, and she’s not very forgiving. (And I can’t blame her!)
Uncle Lumpy
January 8th, 2008 at 5:12 pm
#107 Loopina —
Thank you for reading the comics, so we don’t have to!
Billingsley’s clearly got a formula that works for him. Not much room for growth or surprise, but maybe that’s not why people read comics.
Niall
January 8th, 2008 at 5:16 pm
111. ChattyGenes: …wow. I had an actual insight? I feel warm and gooey inside now. :) (Next: I’ll actually be funny! …naaaah, never happen. :)) Thank you for the feedback!
Uncle Lumpy
January 8th, 2008 at 5:27 pm
#111 Chatty, #113 Niall –
For a really stark example, try Steve Canyon. Milton Caniff was by all accounts a good guy, but he was a product of his time, and the gender- and race-based condescension in his strip gets really creepy.
Allie Cat
January 8th, 2008 at 5:28 pm
#111 Chatty – I think you make a good point. I used to love, love, love FOOB. Mike and I are roughly the same age. I originally found the monthly letters on her site not to make fun of them, but because I wanted more info.
Around the time I grew thoroughly disatisfied with her story lines, I found this site.
I think Mike’s character used to be fairly interesting and likeable, but now, he just makes me mad. He’s pompous, he sticks his wife with most of the work in their home – he had his parents’ house handed to him on a platter. He ran back into a burning building to save his precious novel. He got a $25K advance on the novel.
It’s not sour grapes. I have a nice husband, a job I love, good friends, a beautiful home.
I just think the way he’s written makes him look like an asshole.
As I said – I used to love FOOB, and that is why I snark so much now.
Nil Zed
January 8th, 2008 at 5:54 pm
109 – there are a few farsides which we recall to other family members using key words. My favorite is ‘tofudabeast’.
Eats Shoots And Leaves
January 8th, 2008 at 6:06 pm
#116 – Cheetah wheelies!
Deena in OR
January 8th, 2008 at 6:10 pm
116-
“Wait a minute, this is grass!!!”
mir777
January 8th, 2008 at 6:11 pm
This made my day – thanks!
queek
January 8th, 2008 at 6:23 pm
116: “Thagomizer”
Tamex
January 8th, 2008 at 8:29 pm
OK, I know I defended the old FOOB a bit above, but regarding today’s reprint: If this strip was drawn from real life, why did it take almost 30 years for the divorce to happen?
John/Rod: FAIL.
Vince M
January 8th, 2008 at 9:10 pm
116: Cat fud.
Bobdog
January 9th, 2008 at 9:09 am
A3G – In order to help readers somehow differentiate the male characters, Blaze has opted to die his hair black instead of wearing that stupid cowboy hat. The part of Luann will continue to be played by whatever face they slap a blond wig on.
nemoErensenuT
March 9th, 2008 at 7:03 am
I’d prefer reading in my native language, because my knowledge of your languange is no so well. But it was interesting! Look for some my links:
AlexM
August 12th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
I found your site on technorati and read a few of your other posts. Keep up the good work. I just added your RSS feed to my Google News Reader. Looking forward to reading more from you down the road!