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It’s like a recurring bit on Hee Haw, assuming that’s even a thing

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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 7/10/12

I’m putting both yesterday and today’s Snuffy Smith up there to demonstrate that they’re both basically the same joke, which … I’m OK with? There’s something charmingly vaudevillian about having Parson Tuttle continuously lob the same opening to Lureen and seeing her bat “I’m so lonely and desp’rate!” punchlines back to him. Maybe they’ll keep it up all week! Or maybe tomorrow the Parson will stop hinting and just come out and say that he wants her to recruit men for the choir by going out and having sex with them.

Apartment 3-G, 7/10/12

Haha, will I ever get tired of Nina suffering and turning her physical pain and rage on anyone who gets too close? No, the answer is no. “You’d better be telling the truth! I know medical professionals lie to patients constantly. I know you’re a dirty liar! If you make me get into this awkward position and it doesn’t help, I will destroy you, Tommie, do you hear? I have connections! I’ll get your apartment building condemned and your nursing license taken away and have everyone in your family killed! Then I’ll strangle you, but I wanted to do that other stuff first to show that I’m in earnest here. And I’ll do it all using the rage-strength I gain during a single contraction!”

Funky Winkerbean, 7/10/12

Is Funky Winkerbean really going to make us worry about whether this kitten dies on the way up, or possibly down, Kilimanjaro? All signs point to yes! To be fair, the readership is wholly indifferent about the death of any the human characters, so dramatic tension has to be maintained somehow.

Crock, 7/10/12

So wait, Crock‘s done now, right? These are repeats? Enh, whatever, it keeps showing up in my online comics page, so I guess if I can rag on Archie reruns from the 1990s I can make fun of this. Anyway, today’s strip is about Trooper Benson, who was hit by artillery shells during combat and died screaming in agony.

Ziggy, 7/10/12

Despite all of the foregoing, nothing in today’s comics has discombobulated me more than discovering that Ziggy’s cat is a lady.

286 responses to “It’s like a recurring bit on Hee Haw, assuming that’s even a thing”

  1. Pozzo
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:27 am [Reply]

    Quote from Pogo: “I thought all cats was girls.”

  2. Izzy
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:28 am [Reply]

    Put everyone in Apartment 3-G into leather straps and ball-gags, and the dialogue still works surprisingly well. Better, even.

  3. Señor Tortilla
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:30 am [Reply]

    I KNOW I’ve seen Ziggy’s punchline before. And Ziggy’s cat has switched from male to female and back again, so there.

  4. S.Stout
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:30 am [Reply]

    Luann: Greg has now admitted that Luann has been quite awful for some time.

    “Off my game? Yes, I am. I’ve received a lot of guff both at LuannAlyzers and GoComics for the way the current Luann/Quill story has unfolded. I deserve it. Nothing about these strips pleases me so why should they please you? It’s like I wrote this stuff while only paying partial attention. How did this happen? I’m not sure but I’m going to blame it on a recent Perfect Storm Of Distractions. “I’m not sure” because I’ve certainly worked with distractions in the past and managed not to suck. But the past few months have been a cacophony of house issues, family issues, visitors, guests and various other things too personal – or boring – to go into here. Plus, I’ve been preparing for Comic-Con and working on getting a musical I wrote up on its feet. None of which should be an excuse for half-hearted attention to LUANN. For weeks, I allowed the strip to take a back seat to Everything Else. I wrote and drew in brief snippets of available time. And now we’re seeing the results: a lurching, disjointed, what-the-hey series of strips. I’m hoping this Perfect Storm will abate soon but even if it doesn’t, the Commenters have reminded me that my first obligation is keep my focus on my work. Got the message. From now on, LUANN will be nothing but incredibly compelling, perfectly crafted, 100% blunder-free strips, every day! Oh, wait, a sprinkler just busted…”

  5. GPS
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:30 am [Reply]

    Let’s hope no one just started reading Apartment 3G today.

  6. Chareth Cutestory
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:32 am [Reply]

    Apartment 3-G: Please just be gas. Please turn out to be one big fart joke. Pleasepleaseplease

  7. wossname
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:33 am [Reply]

    MT – I’m getting great enjoyment waiting to see what dire situation Rusty and Sassy are going to stumble into. This is better than a Charterstone pool party! Although in both cases, the plots that eventually emerge never live up to my anticipation.

    JP – Panel 3 is pure win! Look at Sam’s dainty, lily-white hand in Bubba’s big manly mitt.

    MW – I like to imagine Tobey delivering her line with extreme sarcasm and eyeroll.

    Plug – A poll: When you hear the phrase “diamond cutter,” do you immediately think of: (a) person who mows a baseball diamond; (b) jewelry person who puts the facets on diamonds; or (c) incredibly hard erection? (The Urban Dictionary and I vote for (c).)

    Stone Soup – Unironic awwww.

    @Poteet (Y#87) and @bats :[ (#Y94): Re the kitten in FW, I will join in seeking vengeance if anything bad happens to it. But my bet is that it will somehow save stupid Dan (or possibly stupid Les and/or stupid Summer) from some calamity on the mountain.

  8. S.Stout
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:34 am [Reply]

    A3G: Could the first panel of A3G be the best comic panel ever placed out of context? I’m thinking yes. What if it hurts too much, indeed.

  9. Liam
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:34 am [Reply]

    A3G-Nina can’t get into that pose. She can only do the missionary position.

    MW-And here we are speaking in platitudes again. I swear the person who writes this just goes through a bunch of self help books and takes out the sentences that sound the best.

  10. nescio
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:37 am [Reply]

    Many, many indignities have been forced on Ziggy throughout the years, but he really seems forlorn at the thought of having to read Garfield.

    FW: Glad you bought an expensive vacation to Africa to climb Mt. Kilimanjaro, but your tour guide decided you should cat-sit during the whole time.

    BGSS: Lureen got so desperate, she got herself transferred to Bizarro to marry someone. The cost of the trip? Her little fingers.

    Jumble: RIFFED is a legimate word but does not yield a proper solution like DIFFER. Tricksy.

  11. Dennis Jimenez
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:37 am [Reply]

    GB&SS – Tomorrow – some sort of, “A hard man is good to find” riff….

    A3G – Step 2 – now kiss my ass….

    FW – Lisa had a pussy….

    Crock – Seven veils is not enough – no not even seventy….

    Ziggy – Ha-Ha – ziggy is pussy whipped, and he doesn’t even get laid….

    Adios Amigos, DJ.

  12. pugfuggly
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:42 am [Reply]

    A3G (2 minutes later)

    “PADDY WHACK! PADDY WHACK! PADDY WHACK! Ha ha ha…oooo…ok, now lie on your back and and raise your head up to your knees. I’m being totally serious this time, I promise …/snicker/…”

    Crankshaft ‘What am I missing?’ Any kind of a joke, dear, and you’re not alone.

    MT Yeah, just look at that ram, strutting around like he owns the place. I bet you could take him, Rusty….

    Luann ‘Oh, I’ll think of you Quill, in an old-time romantic movie way, since I can’t seem to remember in colour…’

  13. K. Ivan Ruppert
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:43 am [Reply]

    Snuffy Smith is funny because Lurleen is tired of boyfriends who smack her around every night.

  14. Drew Funk
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:44 am [Reply]

    “Th’ church choir needs another bass, Lureen !!”
    “If ya find one, parson, see if he’ll help with my lower register too”

  15. Rocky Stoneaxe
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:55 am [Reply]

    The inspiration for “Cybil the Heli-Cat” in Lio?

    http://dsc.discovery.com/life/its-a-bird-its-a-plane-its-a-dead-cat.html

    Also worth noting:

    On July 9, 1953 the first helicopter passenger service was introduced (by New York Airlines) in NYC. Prior to that date, helicopters in the U.S. were only used
    to carry mail and cargo.

    When it comes to doing weird shout-outs, Lio has Nancy beat seven ways to sundown.

  16. Doctor Handsome
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:55 am [Reply]

    If the cat claws Ziggy’s eyes out in a frustrated rage at Garfield‘s unfunny banality, I will be a very happy man.

  17. Drew Funk
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:00 am [Reply]

    “All th’ men in th’ church choir are tone-deaf, Lureen !!”
    “I know how ya feel, parson. I can’t find a man to hit all my notes either.”

  18. Doctor Handsome
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:01 am [Reply]

    “Dan, I’m going to go ahead and blame the malaria epidemic in the village on you, too. You just seem like a jerk.”

  19. UncleJeff
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:01 am [Reply]

    @S.Stout (#4): That’s a pretty remarkable admission by Greg Evans.
    If I was with his syndication company, I’d be scheduling an “employee review” about now and reminding Evans that his importance to the company is not with his musicals.

  20. Doug Puthoff
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:05 am [Reply]

    Josh, every bit on “Hee-Haw” was a recurring bit. It wasn’t even original the first time.

    FW–I still believe that cat is either Le Chat Bleu or the reincarnation of St. Lisa of Westview.

  21. Lynn
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:08 am [Reply]

    I agree, that A3G panel belongs on a t-shirt, especially as no one would ever guess, from the art, that a pregnancy is involved.

    FW: Haven’t I read this somewhere? The guy will try to get a great photo of the kitten at the peak of the mountain, and then it falls off into a chasm? I’m sure I had to read this in high school.

  22. Dono
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:08 am [Reply]

    “It won’t be any of our faults,” wrote the cartoonist whose ear for dialogue could charitably be described as tin.

  23. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:08 am [Reply]

    Tommie: Get down on your hands and knees and lean forward.

    Nina: What if it hurts too much?

    Tommie: We’re using lubricant, it will feel good!

    The action suddenly shifts to JP, where Bubba says: Get down on your hands and knees and lean forward.

  24. Doctor Handsome
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:09 am [Reply]

    I’m no ballistics expert, but if it takes four headshots with a cannon to kill someone, something’s out of the ordinary.

  25. Shem
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:10 am [Reply]

    @wossname (#7):

    For wrestling fans like myself, “diamond cutter” means Diamond Dallas Page’s finisher.

  26. CanuckDownSouth
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:10 am [Reply]

    We’re supposed to focus on whether a kitten survives a hike up a mountain? If it didn’t die from lack of food / water for at least a couple of days before getting to base camp (or the cold in the hold if the backpack was checked) I can’t get worked up about it. Plus how did it avoid detection on X-ray scans of the bags? It’s probably already a ghost (please let this be a training run for a chat bleu, come to take Les away – please!)

  27. seismic-2
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:13 am [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#15): A cat-copter is a recurring gag in Cow and Boy too, of course.

    @S.Stout (#4): Greg Evans has written a musical and is trying to get it staged? Where is Clown-9, when you need him?

  28. Doctor Handsome
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:17 am [Reply]

    Is this the Parson’s subtle way of trying to get Lureen to admit that she’s Snuffy in drag?

  29. These Strange Worlds
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:19 am [Reply]

    FW:

    I’ve just been assuming the black kitten will eventually morph into Lisa’s ghost, or whatever hell-spawn that French black cat-demon is supposed to represent. Best case, this transformation will occur when our hero collapses in mute nostril aginy and is left on the side of the trail “until the rescue party arrives in a few days.” Maybe in sight of the frozem Hemingway leopard.

  30. catondan
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:20 am [Reply]

    Josh,

    “Anyone who gets too close”

    Annoying grammar nit-picker/fan

  31. Rocky Stoneaxe
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:22 am [Reply]

    @Dono (#22): Batiuk’s using the tin ear I gave him on his 10th wedding anniversary.

  32. Noel Schornhorst
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:22 am [Reply]

    For a moment, I thought Lurleen was trying to suggest gay marriage to the Parson… but then I realized no man in his right mind would ever touch him.

  33. Marc
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:24 am [Reply]

    Mark Trail- Yeah, that bighorn thinks he’s the cock of the walk. The bee’s knees, the big man on campus, the grand poobah of the Lost Forest, the big kahuna. Go over there and show him what for! Once he’s tame you’ll be able to take all the pictures you want, Rusty Robot. And then you can stop saying it every 10 seconds.

    Mary Worth- Mary should give share her view point with the deformed manic-depressants over in Westview. Then the Funkyites will have a platitude for every miserable situation they encounter. Wife died of cancer? “It’s always darkest before the dawn”. Lost your arm and have an overbearing, nut job mother? “A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush”. Fat ass drunk who owns a failed pizza chain? “Don’t count your chickens before they hatch”. Creepy, pedophile comic book store owner who married the wife of an Iraq war veteran who is still alive? “Go fly a kite. Just not at the park, you’re not allowed there anymore remember?”

    9CL- Help me out here, who is this lady? Judging from the dialogue, she’s an ex-nun who was to horny for the convent and now spends her days running through Central Park in a unitard, seducing monkey faced losers. But I don’t think I recall seeing her before.

    A3G- Tommie is prescribing that Nina have sex isn’t she?

    Funky- As it ioften is for me in movies, etc; I’m rooting for the animal to survive much more than the people.

    Luann- Are these two so stupid that they don’t realize that they can still call each other, skype, chat on facebook, and email each other? This isn’t 1700, there are a lot of ways to communicate instantly with people in other countries. Just because he’s going to Australia doesn’t mean you can never speak to each other again. Goddam this is a new level of stupidity.

    Family Circus- These past few weeks we’ve really gotten to see the dark side of Dolly. Her horrible, midget-bitch traits are coming out in full force.

  34. Noel Schornhorst
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:25 am [Reply]

    Is it bad that I care more for the little kitty than I ever cared for any other character in Funky Winkerbean in the history of ever?

    Or does it just mean I’m a human being and have standards?

  35. Horace Broon
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:26 am [Reply]

    FW: Wow, look how serious James is in the third panel. “If this kitten doesn’t survive, it’ll be like you murdered it. Do you know what the Ghost Who Walks does to kitten murderers?”

    GT: So Steve Boone – established as having an unknown condition which “the experts” say requires “space and support” – is a former student of Gil’s? Anyone remember who he was?

    H&L: I laughed. Not because it was funny in itself, of course, but because it reminded me of “The Crimson Permanent Assurance” from Monty Python’s Meaning of Life.

    OTF: Dethany proves that Goths can go Steampunk without discovering brown.

    Phantom: We can only hope that whatever he does to kitten murderers is more logical than what he does to crime bosses who are also heel wrestlers.

  36. Ed Dravecky
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:28 am [Reply]

    That is an outrageous accusation, Josh! I am in no way “indifferent about the death of any the human characters” in Funky Winkerbean. Indeed, I spend a non-trivial portion of almost every day praying for their swift on-panel deaths.

  37. Horace Broon
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:30 am [Reply]

    @S.Stout (#4):

    Unfortunately, apologising for this particular story suggests he thinks the Ann Eiffell stuff was the top of his game.

  38. RavenHawk
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:31 am [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#12): Luann ‘Oh, I’ll think of you Quill, in an old-time romantic movie way, since I can’t seem to remember in colour…’

    Nice one.

    I wonder if Ragtime music, is playing in the background (circa 1921).

  39. Bill the Butcher
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:32 am [Reply]

    Just in case you want another Foreign Legion strip to make fun of (and actually it’s far superior to “Crock”) try The Adventures of Legionnaire Beau Peep.

    http://www.beaupeep.com/stripsofweek/weeklystrip1.php

  40. LoFoMoFo
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:32 am [Reply]

    MT: Let’s hope that old ram has bad eyesight and mistakes Rusty for a yew in estrus. Now that would make a good picture.

  41. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:33 am [Reply]

    FW: It would be great if Batuik would engineer an ironic non-death, like if Dan had to climb to a very dangerous precipice to save the kitten. Meanwhile, waiting at the bottom, watching his daring ascent, the rest of the tour got killed by a rockslide. Dan, of course, would wander alone for days and die of the infected cat-scratch he suffered. Though that wouldn’t fit the irony, I’d find it hilarious.

    I love that kind of ironic non-death. In Slaughterhouse 5, when they escaped the firebombing of Dresden by hiding in a slaughterhouse. Also in Thank You For Smoking, Nick Naylor is attacked by militant anti-smokers. They tried to overdose him with nicotine patches, but since he was such a heavy smoker, his system was able to handle it.

  42. Bill the Butcher
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:33 am [Reply]

    @LoFoMoFo (#40): Yes. a yew tree in oestrus would make the Guinness Book, all right.

  43. exapno
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:36 am [Reply]

    CK is down…AGAIN

  44. S.Stout
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:37 am [Reply]

    @Shem (#25): I too think of Diamond Dallas Page. That was the heyday though.

  45. Bill the Butcher
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:37 am [Reply]

    The thing that gets me about Greg Evans is that he seems to think he “managed not to suck” in the past. Of course, this comes from a guy who last put up an interesting story arc in…what, 2006?7?

  46. Horace Broon
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:37 am [Reply]

    @Bill the Butcher (#39):

    Beau Peep! I didn’t know it was still going! When I was a kid, my uncle had Beau Peep and Peanuts collections he’d lend me.

  47. Dood
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:37 am [Reply]

    Why does Parson Tuttle even care about the choir, unless there’s an angle to bilk more food and money from his flock?

  48. Stev0
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:38 am [Reply]

    Isn’t one of the foretold signs of the Apocalypse a Snuffy Smith story arc?

  49. Black Drazon
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:39 am [Reply]

    Nina looked down. Get on my hands and knees? she thought. But that means… going into the void. The void had always been there, for as long as she could remember, below her waist and above… whatever was below her waist. They had all come out of the void, in their teen years, but no one ever knew or remembered what went down there. It was said that, to there they would all one day return. But Nina wasn’t ready. “Okay,” she said, mustering her courage. “I’ll try. But you’d better be telling the truth!”

    Trembling, she got to her knees. Oh god, she thought, as she lowered herself off-panel and toward the unseen ground. The voices.

  50. Sequitur
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:41 am [Reply]

    Luann: How many of you out there have flashbacks of your life in third person standing off to the side?

  51. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:41 am [Reply]

    MT: I want to ram my bighorn into that sassy bitch!

    Come on, you were all thinking the same thing.

  52. Bill the Butcher
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:42 am [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#50): I suppose you’re excluding the non-brain-damaged segment of the populace?

  53. LP2004
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:42 am [Reply]

    @Ed Dravecky (#36): Ed, you’re obviously a kind-hearted man; a lot of us would prefer the agonizingly slow on-panel deaths of the human characters in Funky Winkerbean.

  54. endless sky
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:44 am [Reply]

    @Noel Schornhorst (#34): I totally get the kitty-love. The only other FW character who comes close is Wally’s dog.

  55. casino LF
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:46 am [Reply]

    @Chareth Cutestory (#6): It’s certainly possible. As I learned from Dr. Cox on “Scrubs,” pushing the baby out can make you poop.

    MT: When you’re acting like you own the place, I think that generally precludes prancing.

    RMMD: “The old witch made his life miserable, even though he was a drunk with a gambling problem who was of course a total saint.”

  56. gnemec
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:47 am [Reply]

    A3G: How on earth will this work? There is no way the artist can draw a human in that position. Showing Nina sitting on the floor was almost too much for him.

  57. seismic-2
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:48 am [Reply]

    FW: I hope Les adopts the kitten and puts it in his sleeping bag. I also hope it attracts lots and lots of snakes.

  58. bats :[
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:50 am [Reply]

  59. TheDiva
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:53 am [Reply]

    A3G: I had two cesareans, so help me out here: do people really give birth doggie style? It seems like it would be one of the more awkward positions to push a kid out from…

    FW: Why can’t they just take the kitten back to the base camp? Is it the cat from “The Cat Came Back”?

  60. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:54 am [Reply]

    A3G: Scott has become part of the background, swirling around like the curtains and the picture frame with some of Luanne’s insipid floral artwork.

    Yeah, wasn’t there a chick in this strip named “Luanne”?

  61. monsieurjohn
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:54 am [Reply]

    A3G: It’s going to be difficult to depict that position by drawing her from the shoulders up, seated.

  62. Charly
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:54 am [Reply]

    @#4 I don’t buy it. Links or it didn’t happen.

  63. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:57 am [Reply]

    Zig: That’s a comic book, not the comics pages. Dumb cat.

  64. endless sky
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:59 am [Reply]

    @S.Stout (#4): I thought that here of all places folks would recognize a clever parody.

  65. Mibbitmaker
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:01 am [Reply]

    Another oversnarpologies kinda day…

    A3G: Tommie: “Oh, ya got me! I was totally lying to you, girl! This will hurt — ALOT! I just wanted to make you suffer, you horrible human being! Worst ever… and I know Margo Magee!”

    FW: “Really, it’s just to keep the Moores here blameless for anything! They’re ‘specialest snowflakes’, y’know…”

    Crock: Ah, vaudeville!

    Zig: Moments of silence pass as Ziggy contemplates the pointlessness of the request. Not long into his thoughts, the bird cuts in with an angry, startling, “NOW!!!!”

  66. TheDiva
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:01 am [Reply]

    9CL: .oO(He said ‘dandy’? Nobody says that, even in the antiquated vernacular of this strip!)

    C’shaft: Nothing at all, Rose. Nothing at all.

    Luann: “Maybe”=”For about thirty seconds, or until my next improbably perfect love interest comes along, whichever comes first.”

    MT: Is Rusty about to get rammed in the gut by a bighorn? Please say yes.

    Marvin: In other news, Marvin tackles the weighty issue of canine suicide. (Canine Suicide would be an awesome name for a metal band.)

    MW: If Mary starts singing “Always Look on the Bright Side of Life,” I will take back everything I ever said about this strip.

    SM: “Actually, you’re going to end up kidnapped no matter what, so just do what you normally do.”

  67. teenchy
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:05 am [Reply]

    @Doug Puthoff (#20): I grew up in the rural South in the 1970s, where we had three network TV stations and a PBS station (though it was called “ETV” as a warning to let you know you might get an education by watching it). On Saturday evenings two of the network stations ran Hee Haw while the other ran Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom and ETV ran The Lawrence Welk Show. With such limited options I can thus confirm that Hee Haw was nothing but a series of recurring bits.

    Mostly what stick in my mind (and sorry, no YouTube hyperlinks for now) are the shout-outs to small rural towns (“Hee Haw salutes Roopville, Georgia, population True Fable and a few dozen goats. SAAAAAAAAAAAAL-UUUTE!”), Grandpa Jones’ recitation of a country dinner menu (“Hey Grandpa, what’s for supper?…. YUUUUUUUUUUM-YUM!”) and the Archie Campbell “you met another and *raspberry* you were gone” ditty. Having seen many YT clips since then I realize that sandwiched in among all the cornpone were actually some decent country & western acts; however I seldom had the ability to sit through the rest to hear them.

  68. Mibbitmaker
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:05 am [Reply]

    The New Pop Culture’s Kids is up!

    R.I.P., Cap’n McHale.

  69. Sequitur
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:14 am [Reply]

    Ripley’s tells us…

    Once every 7 years people in central Madagascar remove ancestors from graves, spray them with perfume, wrap them in new cloth and dance with them before they are reburied.

    Les Moore does that with Lisa every year.

  70. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:15 am [Reply]

    HotC: ahh, that explains the costume.

    Lio: that is spooky.

    PBS: man, it’s been months since we’ve had a vuvuzela joke!

    Bizarro: Noids DON’T DO DOODLES!

    JP: Sam is in love. And MAN I wish Dingo was alive to see Bubba grace the funny pages.

    Mutts: *does happy little dance*

    PMP: boot to the ass in 3, 2, 1 . . .

    SF: didn’t we discuss “soft rhymes” recently?

    F-: it’s now been over two months without a weak laugh at this strip. Considering dropping the tab out of boredom instead of the usual (NS, Candorville) annoyance.

  71. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:16 am [Reply]

    @Doctor Handsome (#24):

    Crock – A human can take a maximum of one cannonball to the head. Any more will just whistle through the space where the head used to be.

  72. Whippersnapper
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:18 am [Reply]

    FW: Presumably, the kitten, like everyone and everything in the Winkerverse, has cancer and will soon be dead anyway.

  73. Sequitur
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:20 am [Reply]

    Ripley’s keeps talking…

    A Ukrainian chemistry student at Kiev Polytechnic Institute was killed in 2009 after he accidently dipped his chewing gum into an explosive chemical.

    It was the kind of gum people chew who want to quit smoking. He is no longer smoking but he did go up in smoke.

  74. Liam
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:20 am [Reply]

    FW-If that kitten dies you will die.

    MT-Judging by the distance between the two of you, Rusty, you will need to get closer for a better picture.

  75. Downpuppy
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:21 am [Reply]

    A3G: Like everyone, I’m puzzled. Will Tommie’s next instruction be “Bark like a dog” or “Smell the glove?”

  76. Sequitur
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:24 am [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#71): They were Robocop cannonballs. I don’t want to explain this. It’s gruesome.

  77. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:26 am [Reply]

    3G – This should be the week we find out that Tommie learned everything she knows about delivering babies from Butterfly McQueen.

    Mark“That old bighorn…” “That old bear…” I’m beginning to think the problem with Lost Forest and its furry denizens is that they’re all senescent geriatrics. Can’t they get some new animals somewhere?

    Marmaduke – Where’s your home entertainment center and indoor pool now, Marmaduke?

  78. Santa Royale With Cheese
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:27 am [Reply]

    JP: Bea’s boobs bulge, boys bemused by benevolent Bubba. Film at 11.

    JP 2″ SRSLY, check out the action lines in Bea’s chestal area in panel one. They’re like air bags.

    JP 3: BEWWWWWWWWWWBS

    JP 4: Raise your hand if you’re snickering like an 11 year-old. Both hands if you *are* an 11 year-old.

  79. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:27 am [Reply]

    Marvy – “Dear Wendy: Without my distinctive fur, I’ve lost all my savoir-faire, all my machismo, all my gravitas… all my reason for living. Signed, Craphound.”

    ML – The thing I always loved about little kittens is the fact that their faces clearly register “What the hell was THAT?” ten or twelve times per minute.

    GrimmDOOR JOKE!!!

  80. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:27 am [Reply]

    Pluggers think this joke is not only worth telling, but worth repeating.

    Rip – Day after day, this didn’t refresh at Darkgate. I finally went to Rip Haywire’s own site and found the weeks of continuity I’d missed. Then they stopped refreshing. Now I see that Darkgate has refreshed, catching up to the strip that’s been on Rip’s website for the last three or four days.
    They’re messing with me.

    Spider-Man – If a nut is out to get MJ, is she safer out on the random streets of Manhattan, or staying at her known address?

  81. Jim North
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:28 am [Reply]

    A3G: Okay, say goodbye to Nina, everybody! Since she’s going to be on a level lower than a person’s upper chest, we won’t be seeing her for a while. Bye, Nina! We’ll miss you!

    DtM: Ever the method actor, Dennis has severed his own arms in order to get just the right level of pain for a good bloodcurdling scream.

    DT: Don’t kill Blaze and Mr. Crime! Don’t kill Blaze and Mr. Crime! Take the rest! Take Liz if you absolutely have to! Just don’t kill Blaze and Mr. Crime, dammit!

    FC: “Sittin’ there, thinking he’s so darn cute,” Dolly mumbles to herself as she digs through the knife drawer in the kitchen. “I’ll show him cute, that’s for darn sure!”

    Luann: Luann may think of him from time to time, but I’ve already forgotten who what’s-his-face even was. I wanna say . . . Smith from accounting? But that can’t be right. Smith has an eyepatch.

    MT: Rusty’s taking pictures of bighorns down in the pasture as they come down to feed? Who could have possibly seen this coming?!

    MW: I have this theory that every single Mary Worth can be made better by adding “stupid bitch” at the end. Try it out!

  82. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:28 am [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#y111): Coated Tart & Tiny candies still seem to be made, but they only show up in limited-release fancy plastic cases that are shaped like something and have some mechanical doodad (possibly even motorized) going on. Last ones I saw were in a croaking plastic frog (battery powered) that you had to hit on the head so it would poop out the few candies wedged inside.
    My suggestion: try bulk candy places at malls. If I find one, I’ll report back.

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#70): I called my first apazine The National Noid (originally “‘Noid”), and a year or so into my run, some crap pizza company started using the name for some asinine campaign. Very funny, Mister Noid. They abandoned it before I did, but some people probably thought I was just referring to that clever, clever series of ads.

  83. Bill the Butcher
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:29 am [Reply]

  84. cheech wizard
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:31 am [Reply]

    Kilimanjaro is a snow-covered mountain 19,710 feet high, and is said to be the highest mountain in Africa. Its western summit is called the Masai “Ngaje Ngai,” the House of God. Close to the western summit there is the dried and frozen carcass of a kitten. No one has explained what the cat was seeking at that altitude, or what sort of despicable person brought it there.

  85. Apt5H
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:34 am [Reply]

    You put your left hand in
    You take your left hand opt
    You put your right hand in and you shake it all about
    You do the Hokey-Pokey and you turn the babe about
    That’s what birth’s all about

  86. Apt5H
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:35 am [Reply]

    That should read out. Dern autocorrect

  87. seismic-2
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:36 am [Reply]

    A3G: We all know we shall never actually see Nina assume the position that Tommie describes. Instead, Tommie and Scott will tell us what is happening down on the floor below our waist-high field of view. We can also take some comfort in their telling us that a cell phone photo of it has gone viral.

  88. Shrug
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:38 am [Reply]

    @The Ridger (#y61):

    “No, you can’t copyright a book title, at any rate. There are three books called The Enthusiast for sale at Amazon right now.”

    And the library where I work has nineteen different magazines (not all still being published, though many are) called just FOCUS (without a continuation or a prominent subtitle). I think a few years ago when I tried to check I found there something like sixty or seventy journals with that name being published worldwide
    at that time.

    I don’t know; it all sounds rather . . . diffuse.

  89. Bill the Butcher
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:39 am [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#87): We will also have sound effects: “Groan” “Gasp” and even, if we’re lucky, “scream”.

  90. Dennis Jimenez
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:39 am [Reply]

    @Shrug (#88): The Bridges of Hootin’ Hollar….

  91. Rocky Stoneaxe
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:40 am [Reply]

    @LoFoMoFo (#40): eweeweeweeweeweeweeweeweeweeweeweeweeweewe

    @Sequitur (#50): Are you questioning Greg Evans’ use of clip art? HERETIC!!!

    @Sequitur (#73): Ripley’s keeps talking…

    We can only hope Otis the Skydiving Pug breaks one of his falls with Les Moore’s body.

  92. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:41 am [Reply]

    @Apt5H (#85):
    Birth, Doggie-Style!

  93. Dennis Jimenez
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:43 am [Reply]

    @Mibbitmaker (#68): I think he was a Commander – not like the cereal guy who is a Cap’n – RIP all the same though – cool guy. One of my favorite chestnuts was, Did you hear about the fight between Ernest Borgnine and Jack Palance? It was really ugly….

  94. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:44 am [Reply]

    MW – Dammit, Toby, don’t you know that ever silver lining’s got a touch of grey?
    (You don’t need to blame Batty for this one, for once)

    MT – The Goring of Rusty, part 1
    CS – Haha, Pam drugged her Father-in-law last night!
    DtM – Dennis, the Psychological Menace continues.

  95. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:47 am [Reply]

    I .gif you a waddly bebeh seal. *dies of teh kewt*

    IRL, as in Slylock Fox, it’s not easy being cold-blooded.

    when you get this look, you know that you’ve otterly failed. (Bless her soul!)

    epic corgsqui. (Whatchu talkin’ about, Willis?)

    Corgsqui for bb,u.

  96. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:48 am [Reply]

    and lolsnark:

    Sniper Kitteh has grown up.

    not quite the Steve Miller lyrics that I remember.

    take ME!

    Hil, THIS is what Faye grows up to look like. You need to stick with dat.

    raddishing Rule 34.

    awesome Rule 63 cosplay. (leaning towards PG-13, but not very much.)

  97. Steve P
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:49 am [Reply]

    FW:
    Kilimanjaro is a snow-covered mountain 19,710 feet high, and is said to be the highest mountain in Africa. Its western summit is called the Masai “Ngaje Ngai,” the House of God. Close to the western summit there is the dried and frozen carcass of a kitten. No one has explained what the kitten was seeking at that altitude.

  98. Sequitur
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:49 am [Reply]

    @Dennis Jimenez (#93): Actually, he was a Lt. Commander. But I think he deserved the promotion Mibbitmaker gave him.

  99. un malpaso
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:50 am [Reply]

    So, in Apt 3G’s metaphysical universe, If Nina gets down on her hands and knees, does that mean she disappears completely? That would take care of the whole problem immediately.

    Also, in FW, who else is rooting for the kitten to give all of the humans Nairobi Cat Scratch Fever before this trek is over? Oh, and some cancer too.

  100. Red Greenback
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:54 am [Reply]

    Wasn’t “The Comics Curmudgeon” once known as “Josh Tells Ziggy To Read Garfield To His Cat So You Don’t Have To”?

  101. Mibbitmaker
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:57 am [Reply]

    @Dennis Jimenez (#93): Well, at least I got it right in the strip itself. His men did call him “Skipper”.
    I should’ve remembered that his imediate superior was Capt. Binghamton. I’m less fluent with navy rank, and am stuck at M*A*S*H-level army reference, where the irreverent ones were captains, and their tormentors were majors.

  102. Erich Clapton
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:59 am [Reply]

    @Santa Royale With Cheese (#78): But, if I raise both hands how will I be able to. . . Uh, sorry about that. I probably am an 11 year old.

  103. Rob
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:59 am [Reply]

    @TheDiva (#66): No, Rusty will be saved in the nick of time when Mark Trail punches the bighorn back to the 19th Century.

  104. Leatherback Loggerhead
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:02 am [Reply]

    JP: Bubba Victor — Judge Parker‘s answer to Vandal Savage.

    MW: Woah, is that a wee bit o’snark at the corner of Toby’s scowling mouth?

  105. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:04 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#77):
    They could sing the old Gilda Radner song (NSFW):
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKxjBsO-Bvk

    (God, I miss her!)

  106. pugfuggly
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:04 am [Reply]

    @RavenHawk (#38):

    1920s ragtime? That means I have an excuse to post this!!!

    @TheDiva (#66):

    MT: Is Rusty about to get rammed in the gut by a bighorn? Please say yes.

    Judging by the mustard-yellow complexion of that bighorn, I’d have to guess that it’s radioactive, which means that Rusty is about to become the second most ridiculous superhero on the comics page.

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#80):

    Spider-Man – If a nut is out to get MJ, is she safer out on the random streets of Manhattan, or staying at her known address?

    All we know for sure is that her likelihood of survival increases exponentially the farther she gets from Spiderman.

  107. Terry in Maryland
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:09 am [Reply]

    MW: So, what terrible thing is going to happen to Rusty? A rock slide traps him so that his puppy and loyal horse have to go to Cherry for help? A mountain lion comes down the hillside and traps him in a crevice, trying to maul him? The bighorn sheep butts him so he falls down the hill and gets trapped on a ledge.

    You know that something bad is in the works.

  108. Mibbitmaker
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:12 am [Reply]

    (keep in mind that I missed some strips yesterday, and didn’t even realize Josh put up a metapost yesterday until this morning…..)

    JP: Bubba Victor paused, then yelped, “Grrrrrrape Ape!”, to the surprise of almost nobody.

    RMMD: Funny way of showing it, granted.

    MT: Um….. trollface…. I think he does own the place. So, be very caref– …uh….. yeah… go ahead, Rusty. Get a reeeeal close-up there…. closer…..

    NS: You wouldn’t say that, Danae and Lucy, if you were Conan O’Brien… or David Letterman…. or Johnny Carson…. or old enough to know that Leno was once effin’ hilarious before he got Tonight and became a hack. But nevermind that, ladies. If you want to hear about a true villain, well…. Once upon a time, there was a man named Jeff Zucker…..

    MW:
    Problem: These two are SO BORING!
    Silver Lining: I need to take a nap…

  109. Charly
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:14 am [Reply]

    http://www.thecartooniststudio.com/blog/greg

    OMGOMG. It’s REAL. I am actually in shock. “Managed not to suck”?! How much more unprofessional can you be? This really sinks Evans wayyyyy below McEldowner-y in my estimation. At least Brooke takes his pretentious hogwash seriously, views it as his Art. Greg is a syndicate shill and KNOWS it. Where’s the hand sanitizer?

  110. the good ship thetis
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:15 am [Reply]

    @teenchy (#67): Ditto for me growing up. It is one of my eternal regrets that I lived through the “Soul Train” era and never got to see it (I didn’t even know it existed!). We were just too country a market. We did have “Solid Gold” *shudder.*
    Whenever people indulge in nostalgia for the age of 3 tv networks, I take a moment to remember 5:30 pm on a Saturday, an hour ’til dinner, too hot/rainy/cold/whatever to go outside, and the choice of “Wild Kingdom,” “Lawrence Welk” and “Hee Haw” on tv.

  111. Shrug
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:18 am [Reply]

    CROCK: “Trooper Benson” is a code name for a pair of Siamese twins who are Double-Up’s brothers. Brothers.

  112. bats :[
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:23 am [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#96): Yeah, didn’t Steve Miller also write about the Pomeranian of Love, or something like that?

  113. Sequitur
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:23 am [Reply]

    @the good ship thetis (#110): Wild Kingdom was a hoot watching Jim Fowler getting ripped up by wild animals while Marlin Perkins talked about it from the studio.

  114. Poteet
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:25 am [Reply]

    @wossname (#7): Given that Batiuk arranged for the kitten to miraculously avoid being suffocated/starved/crushed during its time in the luggage, not to mention that the kitten was miraculously invisible to all the airport inspection personnel, I suppose it will survive. But now it’s been handed over to the tender mercies of the obviously-irresponsible idiot who caused it to end up in Africa, so I am adding that to the long list of kitten-storyline stupidities that already deserve vengeance.

  115. Peanut Gallery
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:26 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#82):

    Last ones I saw were in a croaking plastic frog

    Thanks for the tip! Life is bufo.

    some crap pizza company started using the name for some asinine campaign

    So you gave up the zine, and started an R&B combo called The California Raisins? (Curse you, Will Vinton!)

  116. bats :[
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:29 am [Reply]

  117. teenchy
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:29 am [Reply]

    @the good ship thetis (#110): Oh, we did have Soul Train. It came on at 12:30pm, same time as Kukla, Fran & Ollie on the CBS Children’s Film Festival. If my mom caught me watching either of those, she knew I’d been in front of the TV for too long and shooed me outside, usually to do some chore or other.

  118. Poteet
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:34 am [Reply]

    @Izzy (#2): And now I can never unsee that.

  119. Poteet
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:40 am [Reply]

    A3G — No panting, no rhythmic breathing, no sweating, and no facial contortions, let alone screaming. It’s like this labor has been outsourced.

  120. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:42 am [Reply]

    @bats :[ (#112): *snurk!*

    *love it*

  121. UncleJeff
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:45 am [Reply]

    @Bill the Butcher (#83): I did like the “bills bills” comment:
    “Please make your protagonists better people.”

    Do you suppose “bills bills” is a CCer?

  122. UncleJeff
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:49 am [Reply]

    Funky Goes to Africa: Little Kitty Cat meets Another Little Kitty Cat of the Opposite Gender.
    They do what little kitties do.
    Their offspring take over the Serengeti, killing off the native lions, giraffes, rhinos, elephants etc. with their diseases previously unknown to Africa.
    Les smirks because it wasn’t his fault.
    Nature writer Mark Trail decides “THIS would BE a good story.”

    The End

  123. Écureuil Écumant
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:04 pm [Reply]

    FW: Mini-kitten reminds me of the monkey-in-the-teacup on the back of ’50s comix books. Mr. Danders could whup that kitty’s ass.

  124. mollificent
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:06 pm [Reply]

    A3G: Why do I get the feeling the next few days of A3G are going to be brain-bleach-tastic? (Which is…kind of a welcome change?)

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#82): Oooh, if you find me a source for Tart N Tinys I shall be forever in your debt. Although my co-workers will curse your name unto the seventh generation. I’m apparently QUITE perky enough, thank you very much. ;)

  125. Dennis Jimenez
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:07 pm [Reply]

    @Mibbitmaker (#101): I always thought it was a good thing Sargent Shriver was in the navy – otherwise the confusion would have been even worse…. Oh, and I don’t think Queen Latifa is a real queen, either….

  126. terrapin
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:07 pm [Reply]

    A3G- Judging by the look on Scott’s face, he knows first-hand that Tommie better be telling the truth.

    Luann- I recently read a ‘Lil Abner collection that had a story where a girl’s lips were so hot she fried the brain of any boy who kissed her. She had to wear a sign that read “Do not kiss this girl! By order of U.S.Government!” In light of recent events, Luann should wear a sign that reads “Do not kiss this girl. You’ll get deported or something!”

    RMMD- “She made his life miserable, but she loved him. She would occasionally kick his cane out from under him, but she loved. Oh, she would get mad and beat him with a dead cat, but she loved him.”

  127. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:13 pm [Reply]

    @the good ship thetis (#110):

    Yes, but if you just hung in there you got a nighttime lineup of The Bob Newhart Show, The Mary Tyler Moore Show, Carol Burnett, and, if your parents let you stay up late, that new, irreverent sketch comedy show ‘Saturday Night Live’, with unknown young talent such as Dan Akroyd, Chevy Chase, and John Belushi!

  128. Esther Blodgett
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:14 pm [Reply]

    @S.Stout (#4): I totally using this from now on to respond to complaints about my job, my marriage, my houskeeping skills, my personal hygiene, and the state of my lawn.

  129. Esther Blodgett
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:17 pm [Reply]

    @Mibbitmaker (#68): That is so sweet. Your RIP strips are among your best. Not that I wish death to (most) celebrities to provide you with material, but I do enjoy your tributes.

  130. Rocky Stoneaxe
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:20 pm [Reply]

    @cheech wizard (#84), @Steve P (#97):

    Which one of you is Doubleup? Is Doubleup?

  131. Hamsterpants
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:22 pm [Reply]

    “You’ll need to get down on your hands and knees, Nina – Scott and I will help you”, are probs the most exciting words ever read in “Apt 3G”. And still I feel dead inside.

  132. Rocky Stoneaxe
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:33 pm [Reply]

    @Dennis Jimenez (#125): That’s like saying KFC’s Colonel Sanders isn’t really a colonel (or from Kentucky)!

  133. Major Major M. Major of CATCH-22
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:37 pm [Reply]

    @Dennis Jimenez (#125):

    Tell me about it.

  134. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:37 pm [Reply]

    @Charly (#109):
    I always imagine that writers of continuity/story strips have a big flow chart on multiple eraserboards covering the walls of the studio, much like TV shows (“Lost”, for example). Maybe my theory has just been blown out of the water.

  135. Sequitur
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:37 pm [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#132): And Captain Crunch isn’t a Captain. He’s a Cap’n.

  136. casino LF
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#82): Tart & Tinys! Oh shyte! I haven’t thought of those in ages, but I LOVED them. Also the lemon-lime nerds. They never keep the candies I liked :/ End the reign of Blue Sweet Tart Terror!

    At least there are still lemonheads.

  137. Poteet
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:47 pm [Reply]

    MT — (warning, rant mode) I’m puzzled about the “pasture grass.” Pastures are grazing areas for domestic livestock, and in this country, they are almost always fenced. Presumably if the bighorn sheep can wander into the pasture, the livestock can wander out. Not good. Also, one of the major reasons the bighorn population crashed from a few million to a few thousand by 1900 is because bighorns are highly susceptible to diseases carried by domestic sheep. If that’s a sheep pasture, leaving it open to bighorns is not a good idea. And do Mark and Rusty automatically assume that every animal they see is “old” unless demonstrably immature? Of course the golden color of the ram may indicate that it really is old and that LoFo is in Colchis.

  138. Poteet
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:49 pm [Reply]

  139. Joe Btfsplk
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:51 pm [Reply]

    A3G – I don’t have time to read the comments today, but there are a hundred and thirty-eight of them, so I know I’m at least the hundred and thirty-third one to point out that Tommie sounds like she’s trying to talk Nina into experimenting with anal sex.

  140. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:52 pm [Reply]

    @Stev0 (#48): There have been several story arcs in BG&SS, such as recently when Barney Google actually visited his own strip for a week.

  141. Illustrator Steve
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:58 pm [Reply]

    MT – Yeah, Rusty. Maybe you can get a picture of him, and since the bighorn is facing the opposite direction from you, it will surely make a great picture of a bighorn’s butt to give to Cherry!

  142. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 12:59 pm [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#132): General Electric never actually achieved the rank of a full general, either.

  143. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

    @Calico (#134):

    Some strips, such as the new Dick Tracy and the rich-people-are-awesome duo of RMMD and JP, do actually seem to sketch the story lines in advance.

    Then there is 9CL, where the author can barely be bothered to remember what last week’s story was. The current, meandering, ‘arc’, for example, has completely forgotten what the plot was for weeks at a time, in order for extended digressions involving: elder love, movie parody sex scenes, and Edda posing in skimpy costumes.

    The author clearly also forgot that the initial storyline was about Edda’s ego being bruised because she was only hired as an ass double for the modeling career of the spiky-haired ugly girl. By two weeks later, Edda was the only model and was back to having no discernable ass whatsoever.

  144. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:06 pm [Reply]

    @teenchy (#67): I grew up in the NYC market in the 70s. We had a whopping 3 commercial networks, PBS and 3 local stations. All that meant was that there were several more choices of suckitude.

  145. Illustrator Steve
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:10 pm [Reply]

    MT – (Rusty speaks to Sassy while hiding along the ridge): “That old bighorn is prancing around like he owns the place…maybe I can get a picture of him!”
    (National Park Service Ranger on patrol speaks to fellow Ranger): “That red haired kid is prancing around those endangered sheep like he owns the place…maybe I can get these cuffs on him!”

  146. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:12 pm [Reply]

    @Dennis Jimenez (#125): I knew a lawyer who’s first name was “Judge”.

  147. kkarenb
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:13 pm [Reply]

    I have been reading the comics since I was in grade school, and I love Comics Curmudgeon for highlighting the absurdities and downright idiocies of the comics. I know that my husband reads the comics in the newspaper, but he does not share my ironic appreciation of them. The only time we talk about the comics is if we see something that reminds us of each other or someone in our family. That said, twice at breakfast in the past couple of weeks he has said something out of the blue about Funky Winkerbean. The first was a general comment about how stupid the Kilimanjaro story was. The other day it was an expression of disbelief that the kitten survived the plane flights.

    This is really bad for Batiuk – he can assume that Comic Curmudgeon readers will tear his story to pieces, but now even the casual readers are recognizing that this story is pure crap.

  148. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:15 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#143): I read that the guys who wrote Battlestar Galactica refused to sketch out their story lines, so they could go wherever they felt like whenever they wanted. It did get weird sometimes, but not as weird as Lost, for instance, where the story lines were fully sketched.

  149. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:19 pm [Reply]

    Baldo is actually really funny today! The look on his face is priceless.

  150. Baka Gaijin
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

    @Liam (#9): Those are the BEST quotations? I’d hate to see the rejects.

    @TheDiva (#59): Pluggers give birth doggie style…and out their cloacae, too.

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#70): OMG. We did speak of that. Ya think Ces has been stalking us?

  151. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:22 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#144):
    Yes, I did also (lived in Greenwich, CT – the Cos Cob part)
    What did we have – the 3 majors, PBS (was that the same as channel 13? I recall seeing a lot of Goya ads on certain channels, in Spanish) and some VHF channel, 41 or something.

  152. Gringo
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:27 pm [Reply]

    “You’ll need to get down on your hands and knees and lean forward.”

    “What if it hurts too much?”

    This would have worked so much better in Quill’s goodbye scenes with either Luann or Gunther.

  153. Snarkotix Addict
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

    MW “… I try to remind them of the bigger picture. So, I tell them to get to the mall and buy a big-screen TV. Hey, nothing cheers them up more than a better viewpoint of Dancin’ with the Stars.”

    A3G Um… can we skip this next part?

    FC Dolly’s bitter because she’s old enough to realize that she’s moved beyond the “cute” stage to that “funny-looking Keane kid,” and all too soon “downright ugly.” In high school she’ll be a stand-in for the picture in the drama club’s production of “Dorian Gray.”

  154. Snarkotix Addict
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#114): But now it’s been handed over to the tender mercies of the obviously-irresponsible idiot who caused it to end up in Africa,…

    I think Dan is just a cheap trick to come up with a character more loathsome than Les. Shades of black, shades of black.

  155. Drew Funk
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

    At first, I thought that Scott had risen up from below the frame between panels one and two, but after looking at the placement of the curtain, I’ve decided that one of the stipulations about childbirth that Nina has that paramedics might not approve of is that it needs to take place on a rapidly spinning platform.

  156. Snarkotix Addict
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:29 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#87): A3G: We all know we shall never actually see Nina assume the position that Tommie describes. Instead, Tommie and Scott will tell us what is happening down on the floor below our waist-high field of view. We can also take some comfort in their telling us that a cell phone photo of it has gone viral.

    When you hire Margo for a publicist, that’s what you get.

  157. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:29 pm [Reply]

    Well, this time the involuntary stowaway didn’t get through.
    http://www.cnn.com/2012/07/10/world/meast/uae-baby-discovered-airport/index.html?hpt=hp_c3
    Unbelievable.

  158. Gringo
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:33 pm [Reply]

    @teenchy (#117): Kukla, Fran & Ollie on the CBS Children’s Film Festival

    Kukla, Fran and Ollie introduced me to a wonderful little film titled “Skinny and Fatty,” which in turn fueled my lifelong interest in Japanese culture, which led to me living there back in the ’90s.
    So a belated thanks to Kulka, Fran and Ollie!

  159. UncleJeff
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:36 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#113): I attended an event at which Jim Fowler was a speaker.
    He invited questions and then said to the audience: “Please don’t ask me whether I heard that joke that Johnny Carson told about Marlin Perkins. I was likely sitting next to Johnny when he made the joke.”

  160. Baka Gaijin
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

    @Jim North (#81): Your Mary Worth comment is COTW-worthy.

    @Terry in Maryland (#107): That’s an impressive list. How about adding, “Rusty wanders out of the forest after an airheaded blonde and her bloviating oldster friend because of the promise of ‘rainbow swirl ice cream.’”

    @bats :[ (#112): “The Pomeranian of Love.” Love it, love it.

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#132): Wait, what? I’ve been saluting that joker’s statue all this time for nothing? Great.

    @UncleJeff (#159): What’s the joke?

  161. tallyHO
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:54 pm [Reply]

    apt3G

    Strap on!

    Strap off!

    Strap on, strap off.
    The Strapper!

    /jingle

  162. bats :[
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:56 pm [Reply]

  163. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    July 10th, 2012 at 1:59 pm [Reply]

    @UncleJeff (#121): “Better people” — hmmm. I don’t know. I think it’s flaws and tics and idiosyncrasies that make for good comic characters. Who wants to look at a bunch of plaster saints*? Still ‘n’ all, it wouldn’t hurt to have at least one character that a sane reader could sort of root for.

    *Okay, unless they’re in a Pab Sungenis strip.

    @mollificent (#124): Reporting failure. Unless you want to try an ebay seller — looks like the stuff went away in 2007 (which fits my recollection of having seen them within the last five years better than just about anything else has fit any of my recent recollections). On the plus side, I don’t think it ever goes bad. Unless you leave a small bowl of them on a shady dashboard for a few hours.

    @Calico (#157): I’m oddly reminded of a James M. Cain story, “The Baby in the Icebox,” which wasn’t at all what I expected.

  164. tallyHO
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:00 pm [Reply]

    @Gringo (#158):

    In all seriousness, it is television like that which is totally positive exactly because it does tend to inspire kids. I hope that there are still non-PBS broadcast shows like
    that show being made. (and not made to sell toys or as a prelude to a movie or something cynical or vapid).

    Grrr. Razzlerabble. Grouse. I’ll hop off my soapbox now.
    Say, what’s that over there prancing around like it owns the place?

  165. Rocky Stoneaxe
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:00 pm [Reply]

    @Dennis Jimenez (#93): Did you hear about the fight between Ernest Borgnine and Jack Palance? It was really ugly…

    Was Vincent Schiavelli the referee?

    http://movietimes.s3.amazonaws.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/Vincent-Schiavelli-233×300.jpg

  166. bats :[
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:00 pm [Reply]

    @Gringo (#158): I remember “Skinny and Fatty” and have vague recollections of other little films. I also loved PBS’ International Animation Festival series, hosted by Jean Marsh.
    I’m sure that a lot of my hallucinations are based on things like this from decades ago (“or was I dreamin’ it?”).

  167. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:06 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#163):
    Looks like Dolly’s ready to pop PJ into the icebox at any moment.

    Is this a phase some girls go through? Our neighbor’s daughter was so sweet and convivial for quite some time, and now that she is almost 5 she’s bossing her parents around, controlling her friends at times, and interrupting conversations between grownups.
    I guess it’s a challenging (et tu) type thing, to see how much control she has at present in the world as her ego develops.

  168. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:07 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#95): Yay, intellectual corgis!

    Off on vacation—during which I will be having dinner with the one and only Mollificent! Pictures shall be taken and posted!

  169. Baka Gaijin
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#165): Damn, he must take beauty tips from The Cryptkeeper.

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#168): Don’t take beauty tips from The Cryptkeeper.

  170. tallyHO
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

    popeye
    Brutus looks deranged. The look in his eyes is that look that makes a person step back a few feet and, you know, maybe turn and run for your life.

  171. Comcis Fan
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:18 pm [Reply]

    This Dan character looks much like Funky himself. I posit they are twins separated at birth a la Bette Midler and Lily Tomlin in that movie with the forgettable title. Funky runs a dreary pizza shop and eats too much and used to drink too much and fights depression by smirking and trying to improve himself. Dan is a lonely, divorced dotcom millionaire who fights depression by competing in triathlons and climbing mountains and trying to improve himself. Somewhere else, his “fraternal twin” — a Les lookalike — is a humble cancer researcher who writes world-class literature on the side.

  172. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:22 pm [Reply]

    @Calico (#167): Sarah’s ten now, and still pretty sweet. She’s also a definite take-charge kind of kid. It’s like how an Australian Shepherd is known to herd kids spontaneously — when she’s with her friends, she wants to take charge of everything.

  173. Gold-Digging Nanny
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:25 pm [Reply]

    Actually, Josh, I think we already knew Ziggy’s cat was female based on this comic from a while back where Ziggy was on a date with his cat. But I can understand how you might have blotted that out from your memory. The less we can think about Ziggy sexing up his cat, the better.

  174. Señor Tortilla
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:27 pm [Reply]

    @Comcis Fan (#171): Les 2 might be a more interesting, likeable person.

  175. commodorejohn
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:28 pm [Reply]

    @S.Stout (#4): Okay, now what’s his excuse for the last five years?

    Wait, you know what? Not okay. Not okay in the least. When you know you’re going to crap, your responsibility as an author is to stop, step back, and work out how the hell to salvage it, not to just keep rolling and ignore the issue until the wails of your True Faithful cannot be ignored any longer.

    I don’t know why this bugs me more than the fact that Evans’s output is generally about this crappy anyway, but dude just straight-up admitted to not giving a shit about his work. I’d hope for him to get fired (and Luann canceled,) but wouldn’t that require his syndicate to have standards in the first place?

  176. Horace Broon
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:29 pm [Reply]

    @bats :[ (#58):

    Woo! I’ve inspired someone! Go me!

    Oh, and go bats :[ as well.

  177. Baka Gaijin
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:32 pm [Reply]

    I don’t usually follow Judge Parker. I’ll prognosticate anyways: Judging by that lascivious look on his face, Bubba uses the phrase “you have a purty mouth” then off panel one of Dingo’s fantasy sequences comes to life.

  178. teenchy
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:42 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#144): Ah, but that meant you got WOR, WPIX and WNEW, too. I spent a short time in my childhood in the NYC metro area (long story) but I remember watching Sandy Becker and thinking he was just wonderful. Seems like you had a lot of those live adult children’s show hosts there: Becker, Soupy Sales, Officer Joe Bolton and his Three Stooges shorts, Bob McAllister (sp?) with Wonderama, Chuck McCann. I can’t remember which one was on which station however.

    In my neck of the woods we had Mr. Knozit, a low-budget Mr. Wizard knockoff, and Happy Raine, a white woman who dressed up like an Indian, showed cartoons, and had guests from the zoos and state parks.

  179. Artist formerly known as Ben
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:49 pm [Reply]

    SSmith: The parson was hoping to scare up a few new baritones for the choir. Instead he has to listen to the town whore telling her hard luck story. Some days it just doesn’t pay for a man of the cloth to get out of bed.

    Ziggy: Meanwhile over in Garfield, Jon wants Garfield to read Ziggy to him while he takes off his pants.

    MT: “Look at that bighorn, strutting around like he owns the place. Who does he think he is? I’m gonna go down there and give him a piece of my mind.”—2012 Darwin Award winner Rusty Trail.

    MW: “For example, the silver lining of being married to an older man with a lot of medical issues is that there are always pills around. So many pills. Sometimes I think about taking them all at once.”

    C-Shaft: “What kind of Appalachian horror show am I sharing a house with?”

    Agnes: Apparently there’s a reason we haven’t seen anyone from Trout’s family.

    Archie: On the contrary, Archie and Veronica are the only ones safe from the ash-grey zombies. It’s Betty and Jughead who need to get to high ground.

    SL: Well that certainly took a turn for the grotesque.

    Baldo: All three boys have heard and/or seen too much. There’s nothing left for it but mass ritual suicide. Where do they keep the gasoline?

    JP: I like this bearded behemoth. It would be awesome if Bubba Victor is Cornell class of 1993 and knows Sam from the ABA dinners they’ve both attended, but even barring that he’s a breath of fresh air.

    H&L: That capital firm must give out pretty sweet bonuses, if they make you give up an eye when you join. Does the CEO walk on a peg-leg?

    FC: Would it make Dolly feel better or worse if she knew that behind his adorable façade, PJ is plotting vengeance on all who have wronged him?

    S-M: But you’ll be safe in here. Unless I just jinxed you, or something.

    H&J: Aw, sweet. And what is it Jamaal just said? “If you ask where I got it, I’ll have to kill you.”

    Lockhorns: Nice stepping on your own joke, Dr. Pullman.

  180. Liam
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:52 pm [Reply]

    Snuffy Smith-Why is he telling her that the choir could use some men? Is that really a man in drag? From what I have seen the male population is rather small.

  181. Evelyn Quince
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:53 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#98): Yeah, it’d been good if he didn’t have to take any guff from Ol’ Leadbottom!

  182. commodorejohn
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:53 pm [Reply]

    Agnes – I love how gleefully trailer-trashy the world of Agnes is. There’s more detail to this world in mere hints dropped in the dialogue than in the entirety of Luann.

    A3G – Margaret Shulock tries a last, desperate gambit to get Frank Bolle to draw something at floor-level! (I doubt he will, but man, it would make for some hilarious imagery.)

    Blondie – I have to wonder how Blondie of all people could ever feel that jealousy was necessary. I mean, geez, lady, you’re like the walking epitome of “bombshell,” a pleasant and loving spouse, and a talented cook. What the hell could it be possible for your husband to see in someone else?

    DT – Aaaand exit the Comic-Book Mafioso.

    FW – I hope the kitten murders them all.

    GT – “No, Pat Boone.”

    JP – Did we suddenly wander into a pirate movie? Bea here isn’t exactly qualified for wench duty.

    Luann – Oh, nice, a reminder of the time Luann was a minstrel-show Puerto Rican. Classy.

    Mandrake – What are the instincts of a bully? Could we get a Mark Trail Sunday explaining them?

    MW – I hope you find a cloud of radioactive fallout, Tobey. Find your silver lining there.

    SF – Hey, terrible lyrics and generic parent-targeted rage are big sellers in the angsty-junior-high-student market!

  183. Vince M
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:54 pm [Reply]

    @Evelyn Quince (#181): Ahh, that was me. I use a nom de plume for one bit of shtick and it shticks to me.,

  184. Liam
    July 10th, 2012 at 2:58 pm [Reply]

    JP-We might be poor simple people here but even we have heard the legend of the lawyer Sam Driver who attracts money to him like flies to honey.

  185. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:03 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#179):

    ” It would be awesome if Bubba Victor is Cornell class of 1993 and knows Sam from the ABA dinners they’ve both attended”

    Please. Sam got his law degree from the University of Phoenix, and only passed the bar because his best friend is a judge. That is why his secretaries do all the actual legal work and you only see Sam wandering around golf courses or airport runways having checks handed to him.

  186. Baka Gaijin
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:07 pm [Reply]

    @Vince M (#183): Just like the sour quince log in a Whitman’s sampler, the pseudonym just won’t go away.

  187. tallyHO
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:08 pm [Reply]

    @Gold-Digging Nanny (#173):

    I have never worked in a restaurant so I don’t know what the protocol is if you are a waiter and someone essentially asks you to ignore that you have a cat sitting next to you and the cat brought in a dead mouse to eat.

    As a person who eats at restaurants, I don’t have a problem with the waiter hitting the person who would bring that into the place. And, not hitting him like Joe Besser taking a poke at Moe Howard. I mean a roundhouse wallop that makes cartoon lines and cartoon stars appear out of thin air.

    //ok. wait. it is the Ziggyverse. Maybe the rules are different there. Pants are optional at restaurants in the Ziggyverse. Sorry, I was over-reacting.

  188. Gringo
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:12 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#185): Sam Driver is JFK Jr.?!?

  189. Gringo
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:14 pm [Reply]

    @bats :[ (#166): It was a simpler, more edumacational time.

  190. seismic-2
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:24 pm [Reply]

    @Gringo (#188): No. JFK Jr. surrounded himself with slender blondes.

  191. KreatureFeatures
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

    Everyone concerned for the mountain-climbing kitty can relax. I saw this story in my newspaper today: 8-Year-Old Local Boy Climbs Mt. Kilimanjaro. Except for getting a little nippy at night, the climb is more of a cakewalk. Two cooks hiked along with this kid’s group, and prepared meals every night.

  192. btown
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:40 pm [Reply]

    MT: Get down on your knees and lean forward, Rusty!

  193. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:46 pm [Reply]

    @Gringo (#188):

    If Scott Brown hadn’t screwed up the succession, Sam would be sitting in the Kennedy Senate Seat right now.

    Sam is brighter than Ted, at least, in that he always maintains plausible deniability every time his name is associated with a dead stripper.

  194. Dale
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:51 pm [Reply]

    @nescio (#10):

    JUMBLE – I had a more convoluted story. Something about “Riff” being in the witness protection program but still having a past. But you got there first.

  195. seismic-2
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:54 pm [Reply]

    I do so much hope that Les gets butted off the mountain by a bighorn sheep. Yeah, maybe they don’t have them in Tanzania, but then they probably don’t have them in Lost Forest, either. And speaking of our lad along the Georgia-Florida frontier, after Rusty finishes photographing those arrogant prancing rams, can he maybe cool down by taking a swim in the creek?

  196. Hibbleton
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:55 pm [Reply]

    JP: Great art today by Manley. The dramatic tension in the last panel really pushes the plot.

    FW: Speaking of “dramatic tension” caring for a stowaway kitten while hiking a mountainous trail isn’t exactly The Naked Prey

    A3G: The residents of A3G are merely phantoms of events that happened in an imagined past. That’s why Scott can materialize out of thin air in panel two.

    RMMD: In the next episode of “Suddenly Sober,” Iris learns from her stepmom that being a “soul-sucking harpy’ is a valid lifestyle option.

    MT: Rusty has a soul patch?

    MW: Next time you grab some clip art, make sure it fits the scene.
    “Yeah, Mary, silver lining and all that. Phew! who farted?”

  197. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 3:58 pm [Reply]

    @teenchy (#178): Bob McAllister was on channel 5, WNEW. The theme song was “Kids Are People, Too”. My brothers and I would watch tv in the basement and fight during the commercials. We hated that show so much that we fought during the show and watched the commercials. PIX was channel 11. They showed reruns of The Odd Couple as often as six times a day (and I am serious). NEW decided that they’d be the M*A*S*H rerun channel, and ran that show six times per day. PBS was channel 13, but it was Sesame Street, The Electric Company or Masterpiece Theatre. So you had to be 9 & under or 60 & up. WWOR was channel 9 and I never ever in 18 years of avid television viewing ever found anything ever on that channel worth watching. During the presidential broadcasts, where the government hijacked the networks, WWOR showed “The 700 Club”. We watched nearly 15 seconds of Jimmy Carter, most of which was “Who’s that fool in the corner with the wacky sign language?” 10 seconds we spent watching The 700 Club and then we painfully did the unthinkable and shut the machine off with tears in our eyes. If you can’t get people to watch your station when the only other option is a boring speech, you’ve got to consider replacing your programming manager.

  198. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:05 pm [Reply]

    Blandie: Yes, Dag, that girl was looking at you, but it was in the “Keep that freak away from me” kind of way. Nothing personal.

  199. Artist formerly known as Ben
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:07 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#185):

    That is why his secretaries do all the actual legal work and you only see Sam wandering around golf courses or airport runways having checks handed to him.

    True enough. Being around for big payoffs is his one true talent.

  200. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:11 pm [Reply]

    @Calico (#151): Yeah, PBS was channel 13. I think the Goya commercials may have been WNEW, but I can’t be certain. The network affiliates were free to show local programming for most of the non-prime-time slots, and even the network stuff wasn’t very good. Mostly old movies, talk shows and some after school specials. Take the lamest cable produced show now, and you’re still miles away from the 70s TV wasteland.

  201. Hogenmogen
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:19 pm [Reply]

    JP: This hotel is missing Darryl & Darryl.

  202. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:22 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#200):
    Yes, most likely WNEW (I remember my parents ranting about Rupert Murdoch even then, but not for the ads).
    I do remember watching AMC, Ryan’s Hope, Disney on Sunday nights, In The Know and The Archies on Saturday mornings, Adam-12, Emergency, Batman, IDOJ, Gilligan, Brady Bunch, Partridge Family, Pro Bowling on Saturday afternoons (Chris Schenkel announcing for the PBA) and movies like “Poseidon Adventure” “Rollercoaster”, and yes, even “The Godfather.”
    (My folks were adamant against censoring, so let me watch almost anything-only problem was if I stayed up too late)

  203. Droopy Says
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:22 pm [Reply]

    I once raised a pair of orphan kittens. That meant feeding them kitten milk replacer once every two hours, from the age of two weeks (“Here, deranged cat person!”) to six weeks (“Look, guys, food comes in bowls, too.”) It also meant keeping them warm and safe. If you’re a half-hour late for a feeding, because you have to sleep some time, you get a lot of frantic mewing and looks of wide-eyed starvation, and it isn’t an act. I hate to think of what you’d get with a kitten that hasn’t fed for, at a minimum, two days now.

    What I’m saying is Batyuck has already screwed the pooch on this one. The kitten is already dead, in every Monty Pythonesque sense of the word. So I’m hoping it’s the same cat in the Demotivational poster (“Vampire kitteh smiles . . . because you have to sleep some time.”) Lie down and take a nap, everyone, as Death Kitteh wreaks vengeance from beyond the grave.

  204. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:23 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#187): “I have never worked in a restaurant so I don’t know what the protocol is if you are a waiter and someone essentially asks you to ignore that you have a cat sitting next to you and the cat brought in a dead mouse to eat. ”

    In Paris, the cat gets priority seating.

    True Story: I was sightseeing in Paris with my wife for our anniversary. We stopped for lunch in a little cafe on the Seine just before the business lunch rush started. We’re seated at a windows table with this big, fat cat in the middle of the table. We’re told that it is the “house cat” and he sits wherever he damn well pleases. Oh, and we were also told to put away out water bottles, because it is rude to have them out on a dinner table in France.

  205. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:24 pm [Reply]

    Oh, and old S. Temple movies, Li’l Rascals, tons of Hanna-Barbera cartoons as well, plus early early Popeye ‘toons
    Christ, I’m getting old!

  206. Dale
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:26 pm [Reply]

    @the good ship thetis (#110):

    I have a large stinking pile of channels from which to choose.
    It’s approaching 5:00 PM on a weekday.
    What does Slylock think I will select based on information content?
    Wolf Blitzer. Chris Mathews. SpongeBob.

  207. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:29 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#197):
    Didn’t Bob host “Wonderama” too?
    One of my past friends/roomates said she was on that show as one of the goofy kid dancers up on one of those geeky podiums/in those cages)
    Hahahahaha!

  208. Poteet
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

    @Snarkotix Addict (#154): A character more loathsome than Les. A character more loathsome than Les. A charac *brain explodes*

  209. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:38 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#197):
    I’m deeply ashamed to admit that I watched, and enjoyed, F Troop. Gah.
    My Dad was in WW2 in the Navy and enjoyed “Hogan’s Heroes.” More Gah.
    Gilligan’s Island was my fave, though, and I had a big crush on Russell Johnson, “The Professor.”
    Then again, I had a crush on Lindsay Wagner as The Bionic Woman as well, so I guess even at that age I was leaning in various directions.

  210. Dale
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:39 pm [Reply]

    Funky – Assume the kitten made it to Africa (a large foreign country near Europe or Asia or some other foreign place).

    How long and far could a kitten keep up with a van travelling on a dirt road?

    Assume miles and kilometers are pretty much the same thing.

  211. Spotts1701
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:40 pm [Reply]

    @S.Stout (#4): So the argument is that he got so tied up with personal issues and sideline work that he let his primary source of income go to seed?

    Don’t get me wrong, stuff happens and that’s the way life goes. But if you’re dealing with a lot of crap at once, a normal person would curtail the side projects first in order to focus on the work that is the steady paycheck. And if that doesn’t work, see about doing what a lot of cartoonists do and request a LOA (I honestly don’t think anyone would give a crap if the syndicate slapped in 6 weeks or so of reruns instead of fair-to-middling work).

    Honestly, this feels more like an excuse – a poorly-thought out one to boot.

  212. Comcis Fan
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:47 pm [Reply]

    @Señor Tortilla (#174): That was my thought. He’s humble and wants to save people.

  213. Dale
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:48 pm [Reply]

    @mollificent (#124):

    You’re pretty, so a restrained bit of perky is acceptable. The big question is:
    Are you spunky? SPUNK is what unnerves people. Like having true grit.

  214. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    July 10th, 2012 at 4:54 pm [Reply]

    @Dale (#210): How long and far could a kitten keep up with a van travelling on a dirt road?
    What was inexplicably left out is that when the guide went back and picked it up, it slowly drawled, “What’s your hurry… Bub?”

  215. commodorejohn
    July 10th, 2012 at 5:01 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#201): Oh, now I want to see Bob Newhart in a Woody Wilson strip…

    @Calico (#209): Wait, since when is enjoying F Troop a mark of shame?

  216. Baka Gaijin
    July 10th, 2012 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

    @Spotts1701 (#211): …a poorly-thought out one to boot. Were you being ironic here?

  217. Calico
    July 10th, 2012 at 5:13 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#215):
    Oh, just given how Aboriginals (our preferred term for AmerIndian in Canada, or we say “First Nations People”) have been treated, realistically and stereotypically, both in US and Canada over the centuries.
    The show just seems weird to me now. Like Hogan’s Heroes.

  218. endless sky
    July 10th, 2012 at 5:21 pm [Reply]

    @S.Stout (#4): @endless sky (#64): Well blow me down sweetpea! What I thought was a parody by an imaginative curmudgeon turned out to be a real “explanation” by Evans. (explanation = lame, self-serving excuse) I guess we should thank him for finally admitting what we’ve thought all along – he’s out of ideas and has lost interest in the strip.

  219. commodorejohn
    July 10th, 2012 at 5:30 pm [Reply]

    @Calico (#217): Huh. I guess that, with the show’s Native Americans being clearly Yiddish anyway, it’s not the kind of work I’d look to for any meaningful insight on race relations, other than to note the dominance of Borscht Belt comedy in ’60s TV…

  220. Sgt. Stoned
    July 10th, 2012 at 5:37 pm [Reply]

    MT: Let’ see–Rusty falls into a crag and gets his arm pinned between two rocks and has to gnaw it off. Soon to be a major motion picture starring James Franco as “Rusty”.

    MW: (Tobey thought balloon) “Keep your hackneyed cliches to yourself, you old lying sack of shit!”

  221. Spotts1701
    July 10th, 2012 at 5:44 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#216): I wasn’t intending to be ironic, though on review it certainly can be read that way.

  222. Schwa
    July 10th, 2012 at 5:57 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#73):

    A Ukrainian chemistry student at Kiev Polytechnic Institute was killed in 2009 after he accidently dipped his chewing gum into an explosive chemical.

    Did anyone else’s mind immediately go to “This is lemonade! What happened to my culture of amoebic dysentery?”

  223. Red Greenback
    July 10th, 2012 at 6:05 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#219): Your comment reminded me of this.

  224. Frank Lee Meidere
    July 10th, 2012 at 6:08 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#215): “We’re the Heckowie.” Loved that line. When it was popular, my friend in high school was in grade 10, and his class was section F. They called themselves “10F Troop.” We used to do the “I don’t know why everyone says you’re stupid” line, complete with the double take 15 minutes later.

  225. The Ridger
    July 10th, 2012 at 6:15 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#187): In Germany – at least when I was there back in the 80s – dogs were welcome in restaurants. I still remembering a sergeant in my company complaining that the locals preferred dogs in the local eatery to his daughter.

    I had to bite back the answer that the dogs sat quietly under the tables and didn’t disturb anybody, let alone everybody, who was trying to eat.

  226. seismic-2
    July 10th, 2012 at 6:20 pm [Reply]

    @The Ridger (#225): Fred Basset spends time in the pub, too.

  227. commodorejohn
    July 10th, 2012 at 6:22 pm [Reply]

    @Red Greenback (#223): Ahh, the classics…

  228. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    July 10th, 2012 at 6:22 pm [Reply]

    @TheDiva (#59): Actually, from what I understand, it’s the next best position after squatting, as gravity helps the baby through the vagina (unlike the classic lie-on-back posture, which involves squeezing it out uphill).

  229. Joseph
    July 10th, 2012 at 7:18 pm [Reply]

    @Gold-Digging Nanny (#173): Wasn’t there also a strip where Ziggy met a fortuneteller who foretold that Ziggy would meet a beautiful Alsatian? Is Ziggy going all out on the bestiality angle now? Is Ziggy’s writer trying to come out of the bestiality closet?

  230. Jamus The Bartender
    July 10th, 2012 at 7:20 pm [Reply]

    @S.Stout (#4): And he gets money for it. Not much money, I bet, but still.
    Dammit to hell. Give Josh money for his book today.

  231. mommy needs a nap
    July 10th, 2012 at 7:34 pm [Reply]

    @TheDiva (#59):

    On all fours is good for labor, it helps reduce back pain. Actually, for pushing the baby out, squatting is the best position. Anything but lying on your back.

  232. Zerowolf
    July 10th, 2012 at 7:34 pm [Reply]

    @teenchy (#67): Hee Haw Salutes WESTVIEW!

  233. Liam
    July 10th, 2012 at 7:35 pm [Reply]

    Luann-Luann is going to lose her virginity in a back alley behind and Outback to a bus boy that works there because that is the closet she will ever get to Quill again.

  234. Zerowolf
    July 10th, 2012 at 7:36 pm [Reply]

    @Dale (#210): Never underestimate the power of Carcinoma Kitty.

  235. LP2004
    July 10th, 2012 at 7:38 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#219): Okay, I know I watched ‘F Troop’ regularly during its initial run, but that’s about it. Now I’m thoroughly embarrassed to come here and find a guy who, I gather, was born about two decades after the show was cancelled discussing it in detail.

    I guess I need to turn in my official Nostalgic Baby Boomer card. I’m clearly not maintaining standards.

  236. Anonymous
    July 10th, 2012 at 7:38 pm [Reply]

    @The Ridger (#225):
    They still do that in Germany.

    We were in small neighborhood restaurant (very fun and very Bavarian) place in Munich last fall, and there were folks in there with their dogs at their feet.

    Not a big deal, until two of the dogs started snarling, growling, and barking at each other. The dogs even moved around a couple of tables!

  237. seismic-2
    July 10th, 2012 at 7:42 pm [Reply]

    @Zerowolf (#232): I like the idea of Funky et al. being in the cornfield. Can we get Billy Mumy to wish them there?

  238. Der Schnärkïnätör
    July 10th, 2012 at 7:43 pm [Reply]

    @Anonymous (#236):
    #236 was me…

  239. tb4000
    July 10th, 2012 at 7:57 pm [Reply]

    FW: I’m waiting to see if Batiuk decides to answer the age old question of how long it takes for a kitten to fall from Mt. Kilamanjaro.

  240. Rocky Stoneaxe
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:10 pm [Reply]

    @teenchy (#178):

    Remember TV personality Joe Franklin from WOR (later WWOR)? He and his wife used to own a house in Florida. I have boxes and boxes of movie and TV memorabilia from Joe’s personal collection as the result of a dustup (apparently) between the Franklins. She was royally po’d at him about something or other, so she decided to hold a huge yard sale at their house. At least that’s what the guy who sold the memorabilia to me said…

  241. demoncat
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:12 pm [Reply]

    ap3g. you better be telling the truth nina should relize that there is no way all but margo that tommie is incapable of lieing at least she did not say if these procedure fails odds are you and the baby are dead in a pool of blood. fw. hopefuly the kitten at the last minute when some or most of the party sucumbs to death on kilamajro manages to survive.

  242. Brooke McEldowney
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:28 pm [Reply]

    I’ll throw you beefwits a bone. That kitten in Funky Winkerbean will be involved in a daring rescue. You’re welcome.

    Tom Batiuk is a beefwit too. That makes you equal to Tom Batiuk. Again, you’re welcome.

  243. commodorejohn
    July 10th, 2012 at 8:31 pm [Reply]

    @LP2004 (#235): You can blame my parents – my brothers and I had more exposure to the popular culture of the 1960s growing up than we did to the pop-culture of our own era…we were borrowing original-series Star Trek tapes from the library when our contemporaries were watching Power Rangers.

  244. Peanut Gallery
    July 10th, 2012 at 9:55 pm [Reply]

    Beetle Bailey – Cookie, a proper cake safe looks more like this. And while we’re on the subject, can I interest you in a nice pie safe?

    MT, panel 2 – Having no neck is bad enough; having your head mounted partway down your chest is truly monstrous. Either that, or there’s a headless torso crouching behind Rusty.

    MW – “Ah, yes. The silver lining. Every cloud has one,” she said grimly. Her look of determination hardened as she stared into the distance. “You think you’ve got a perfectly good cloud, but hidden away inside, there’s always one of those goddamned silver linings.”

  245. Gold-Digging Nanny
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:04 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#187): I really don’t think that counts as overreacting. It seems like a justifiable response to Ziggy’s existence, let alone having the pantsless gnome bring dead rodents into the place you’re trying to eat.

  246. Gold-Digging Nanny
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:08 pm [Reply]

    @Joseph (#229): I remember that strip, too. I certainly hope Ziggy isn’t taking the bestiality route. Momma doesn’t need the competition.

  247. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:34 pm [Reply]

    @Frank Lee Meidere (#224): I try not to give real names of people who can’t give or deny permission, but I will mention that I was in Scouts with a fellow named Geoff Stroop, and allow you to mentally fill in what sort of reaction he got from the mature sorts we all were at that time. (I spelled at least part of his name wrong. Just because.)

  248. mollificent
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:41 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#168): Wheee! Can’t wait!

    @Dale (#213): Hah! Thanks. ;) Truth be told, I’d rather be considered spunky than perky. “Spunky” implies courage and unwillingness to admit defeat, whereas “perky” merely implies that I’m about to ask if you’ve got a case of the Mondays. ;)

  249. mollificent
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:46 pm [Reply]

    @Sgt. Stoned (#220): Given how creepy I’ve always found James Franco, that seems appropriate. I know he’s supposed to be cute/hunky, but he seriously gives me the wig.

    @Liam (#233): Given that I manufactured a completely bullshit excuse to go back and start a conversation with our Scottish fiddle teacher today (just so I could hear him speak in his sexy accent), I’m not entirely unsympathetic. No, wait, this is Luann. I AM entirely unsympathetic.

  250. Trillian
    July 10th, 2012 at 10:49 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#182):

    Luann – Oh, nice, a reminder of the time Luann was a minstrel-show Puerto Rican. Classy.

    Oh, yeah, that’s what that was! I thought Luann was recalling some deep-seated fantasy about her and Quill dressing up as TJ and Ann Eiffel.

    *sniff* “We never got the chance to play ‘Weenie World’!”

  251. This Guy
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:32 pm [Reply]

    @mollificent (#249): Did you see the episode of 30 Rock that guest-starred James Franco?

  252. Bill the Butcher
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:44 pm [Reply]

    @UncleJeff (#121): Well, he’s certainly not me! I comment on GoComics as King Shark, and everywhere else as Bill the Butcher. But his sentiments in that comment and mine match fairly well, except that I’d have loved to see all of Evans’ characters, except perhaps Dirk, have their heads shrunk by Calvin and stitches put on their lips.

  253. Frank Lee Meidere
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:47 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#247): I sure hope he had a sense of humour.

  254. Mr. O'Malley
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:48 pm [Reply]

    Pluggers: Now I’m no baseball fan, but it looks to me as though the entire outfield is under water, and the pitcher’s mound is ten feet away from home plate. Surely that can’t be right.

    OK, maybe it’s a lakeside ballpark with huge offshore light towers, but wouldn’t the outfielders get wet feet?

    And the grass is about 6 inches high? How often do teams play at this field?

  255. mollificent
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:49 pm [Reply]

    @This Guy (#251): Oddly enough, I’ve never gotten into watching 30 Rock (odd because I love Tina Fey).

  256. Bill the Butcher
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:50 pm [Reply]

    @Illustrator Steve (#145): “Red haired kid”? You mean “deformed midget troll”, don’t you?

  257. Droopy Says
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:52 pm [Reply]

    @Mr. O’Malley (#254): What you see here is The Marching Pluggers. By the time the Plugger has finished pushing that little mower all over the field, the area where he started has already grown back. He’ll never finish, and being a Plugger, it’s the only job security he can find.

  258. Sara
    July 10th, 2012 at 11:53 pm [Reply]

    Is it just me, or is Nina just a bit too calm and well-coiffed to actually be in any sort of pain? Or is this part of that whole Scientology quiet birth bs?

  259. Poteet
    July 11th, 2012 at 12:21 am [Reply]

    @Sara (#258): It’s not just you. I still say Nina is faking it and her actual labor has been outsourced to some poor woman in India who is sweating and moaning and visible from the waist down.

  260. Droopy Says
    July 11th, 2012 at 12:22 am [Reply]

    @Sara (#258): Nina has started to fray a bit. Her words are having contractions.

  261. Poteet
    July 11th, 2012 at 12:23 am [Reply]

    MT — I say Rusty is about to be attacked by a falling boulder, a cougar, a bolt of lightning, or some other natural calamity that tragically, will fail to kill him.

  262. Poteet
    July 11th, 2012 at 12:25 am [Reply]

    FW — If I am supposed to be touched from now on by the affection shown to the tiny kitten by Dan The Big Stupid Jerk, it’s not going to happen. And Summer, wipe that dumb smile off your face. You’re supposed to be the one with a few brains to rub together.

  263. Poteet
    July 11th, 2012 at 12:28 am [Reply]

    JP — Please, please, please start a new strip starring these two wonderful locals. I am more entertained by them than I was by Avery flying down the mountain or anything Sam has ever done.

  264. Droopy Says
    July 11th, 2012 at 12:41 am [Reply]

    Spiderzero: Why does the Daily Bungle hire Peter Parker? He never photographs anything but Spiderman, and only Jonah Jameson cares about that.

    Creepy Les: Somebody feed the kitten already.

    Pluggers: Pluggers don’t eat the rind? I thought they were like walking garbage disposals.

    Mark Trail: I’m sure Rusty will get some fantastic pictures with that box camera. Maybe he can snap a final frame as he falls to his death. Now that would make a good story!

    JP: We think he stinks, too, Bubba, but let’s not quibble. Just hurry up and kill him and Avery.

    Mary Mirthless: If life were always good, we wouldn’t have any need for those lessons, now would we?

    MW, redux: No, that ship is not beautiful. A clipper ship is beautiful. The Titanic and Lusitania, rest their souls, were beautiful. The only way you could call that thing beautiful would be to scuttle it and wait for trhe coral to cover it.

  265. Poteet
    July 11th, 2012 at 12:56 am [Reply]

    @Droopy Says (#264): Re the MW cruise ship, amen amen amen.

  266. Chad Sexington
    July 11th, 2012 at 1:12 am [Reply]

    “If you fail, this kitten will die, and the memories of this one bright and almost enjoyable moment in your life will be forever marred by the specters of guilt and shame that will haunt you from here to your grave and probably beyond. That’s right, this kitten, which I have randomly produced out of nowhere and which serves no purpose other than to function as a nihilistic plot device, will die, and it will be all your fault. In case that wasn’t clear, let me reiterate: A KITTEN WILL DIE! Oh, also, the kitten has cancer.”

  267. Frank Lee Meidere
    July 11th, 2012 at 1:16 am [Reply]

    @Droopy Says (#264):

    Mary Mirthless: If life were always good, we wouldn’t have any need for those lessons, now would we?

    Thank you, thank you, thank you. I hate these meaningless, illogical platitudes that try to justify pain and suffering by saying that they teach us how to endure things we only need to endure because of pain and suffering. I call them “Stockholm Syndrome Aphorisms.”

    When I was 11, our minister gave a sermon in which he claimed that our purpose in life was to act as God’s tools to help other people out. I asked him later what the purpose of the other people was, and he said they were God’s tools too. But I could never see the point of an existence in which our entire purpose was to help other people help other people help other people, and so on ad infinitum.

    Another one is, “If there were no death, we wouldn’t value life so highly.” First of all, this one tends to get trotted out by religious people, who also claim that if you live right you will live forever, which kind of puts a lie to the main argument. And second, have you ever watched children? They have no concern for death at all, yet there’s nothing more alive than a child.

    Screw it, I say. If there’s a way to live forever with nothing bad happening, I’m for it.

  268. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    July 11th, 2012 at 1:33 am [Reply]

    @Sara (#258): I’m been thinking that, too. For a woman who was in so much pain that she couldn’t call for help, and who is now freaking out about a possible complication, and who has a traumatic phobia about birth, Nina is surprisingly serene.

  269. tallyHO
    July 11th, 2012 at 1:33 am [Reply]

    Two words:

    parrot

    pirate

    Now go look at the first panel of Spiderman.

  270. Comcis Fan
    July 11th, 2012 at 1:38 am [Reply]

    MW: “Her smokestack reminds me of Dave.” Meanwhile, I have a feeling this cruise is a bad idea, except for the likely afternoon sandwich smorgasbord in the captain’s lounge.

    FW: Dan may be shaping up to be a magical caucasian.

  271. tallyHO
    July 11th, 2012 at 1:45 am [Reply]

    The rest of the ones for Wednesday are pretty good. Though some were missing those vital elements that make the moon glow at night. Others, are hung up on some lame gags.

    But, I’ll hold off on making fun of ‘em tomorrow.

    One question for the nightowls:

    in Snuffy Smif, the Parson is out recruiting (i’ll withhold commenting upon this three day effort later).

    He’s talking to Snuffy. Is the gesture Snuffy making the Heavy Metal devil sign?

  272. Maggie the Cat
    July 11th, 2012 at 1:46 am [Reply]

    7/11 A3G- This strip has gotten even more ridiculous than usual with all this apartment-birthing going on.

  273. Frank Lee Meidere
    July 11th, 2012 at 2:01 am [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#271): Not sure what sign he’s making, but I just noticed that despite all the other strange bodily deformities displayed by the residents of Hootin’ Holler, they’re the only cartoon characters I know who actually have five fingers on each hand!

  274. tallyHO
    July 11th, 2012 at 2:13 am [Reply]

    @Frank Lee Meidere (#273):

    yup.
    5 fingers and no teef!

    (tongue loll!)

    It took me a while before I noticed the five fingered hands, too. It is definitely what makes them look even more deformed because the hands are too big for the people.

    I tried drawing Snuffy a while ago when I realized that. Also, almost all of the male characters are drawn with wavy lines for the body and especially the arms. I’m guessing that is why the ruffled appearance works. But, it is weird to draw. (and of course something that I noticed before then is that most of the older women wimmin folk don’t seem to wear bras or they are just sagging down to their waists). Taaaarnation!

    Whatever the gesture is Snuffy that is making it just seems like an exclamation point to him turning down the preacherman.

  275. Droopy Says
    July 11th, 2012 at 2:43 am [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#271): Is the gesture Snuffy making the Heavy Metal devil sign

    No, he’s getting ready to pick his widely-spaced nostrils.

  276. Rocky Stoneaxe
    July 11th, 2012 at 4:10 am [Reply]

    @Maggie the Cat (#272):

    “Lawzy, we got to have a doctor. I don’t know nothin’ ’bout birthin’ apartments.”

  277. John C Fremont
    July 11th, 2012 at 6:23 am [Reply]

    JP – Panel Two Bubba is Agent Smith.

  278. Droopy Says
    July 11th, 2012 at 6:45 am [Reply]

    @Poteet (#265): Thanks. I have nothing against giant cruise ships as such. They are a good way for elderly tourists to visit distant spots in comfort and safety. (My parents travelled on one about fifteen years ago, to see the places my dad served in during WW II). But beautiful they ain’t. And as other people have pointed out, what is the point of having these two blah characters board a vacation ship when they’re already in Italy? It’s not like the strip doesn’t have the budget to have Down meet and romance an Italian, while Wilbur waddles in the footsteps of Galileo and Garibaldi.

  279. gleeb
    July 11th, 2012 at 6:54 am [Reply]

    Barney Google: Poor nutrition in his youth has left Snuffy scrawny.

    Dick: And he’s still not dead, you incompetents! Let Tracy show you how it’s done!

    Rex: Iris can only look on with dull surprise as Rex fumbles with the cork. Amateur! She wants at that booze!

    Spidey: That’s it, guys, keep poking the bear with a short stick.

  280. Liam
    July 11th, 2012 at 8:16 am [Reply]

    FC-Even the sky disapproves of Jeffy’s existence.

  281. Powers
    July 11th, 2012 at 10:30 am [Reply]

    Ziggy: AFAIK, Sid has always been female. There was one strip a while back that used the wrong pronoun, but I’m not aware of any other instances of gender-switching.

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