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Animal fancy

Panel from Slylock Fox, 9/9/12

You know, I guess it’s OK for Slylock Fox to go around imposing arbitrary, unchecked justice when he’s putting a stop to actual crimes or whatever. But now it appears that he’s just wandering the land looking for opportunities to be a dick by preventing a little intra-posse tomfoolery. And why is he even assuming that Reeky’s friends are being scammed? Isn’t it possible that they know full well that Reeky means to do 1,000 pushups over a series of days or weeks, but, well, maybe they just want Reeky to do some exercise once in a while, ever think of that? Maybe they want him to improve his health, and that’s worth $10 to them, because Reeky’s their friend. God, Slylock, keep your snout out of other people’s business!

I also dispute that Reeky’s pals are in any way “punks.” Neither of them seem to be cultivating any kind of aesthetic that seeks to shock or undermine bourgeois values in the slightest! Reeky’s pink hair might qualify, maybe, but today that’s pretty tame.

Six Chix, 9/9/12

The look of shock and horror on this poor dog’s face is amazing. “Wait, they’re … they’re alive, and they’re inside of me? And they’re coming out where? And I’m expected to feed them how? Oh god oh god oh god”

235 responses to “Animal fancy”

  1. lorne
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:34 am [Reply]

    In fairness to Reeky, being a rat is as Punk Rock as it gets.

  2. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:43 am [Reply]

    One of my scariest nightmares is being surrounded by clowns and Spidey is my only hope. AAAAAHHH! [QLUNQ!]

  3. rumpled tulip
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:43 am [Reply]

    Slylock Fox focuses on rat push-ups, completely ignoring the abduction and murder of an innocent fish occurring before his very eyes.

  4. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:49 am [Reply]

    Is Reeky Rat just another alias for that badass Bugs Meany from the Encyclopedia Brown books?

  5. Chyron HR
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:50 am [Reply]

    Q: Reeky Rat bet his punk pals 10 bucks that he could wear purple pants and a white undershirt and grill a frankfurter on a stick over a campfire. How did Slylock know that Reeky was trying to swindle his friends?

  6. Chyron HR
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:51 am [Reply]

    A: Rats don’t wear clothing or cook food. Are you stupid or something, kid?

  7. AndyL
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:51 am [Reply]

    Slylock Fox has really taken a step down if he’s handling bar-bets now. If this trend continues, I look forward to the upcoming episode where he goes to a magic show to prove that the lady was not really sawed in half.

  8. OMEGA SUPREME
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:58 am [Reply]

    Slylock Fox: Maybe they’re punks in the prison slang sense, which is to say they’re homosexual bottoms.

  9. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:00 am [Reply]

    FC – Daddy Keane is perplexed by used condoms on the roof…

    Blondie – I’m assuming that when the barber calls Dagwood’s hairstyle “humdrum” it’s part of the joke, right? Right? Because that do is more punk than any of Reeky’s pals.

    Curtis – I thought Curtis’s sneaks were way out of proportion until I saw Kevin Hart on the VCM’s.

    Marvin – Take my GPS, please! Yes, today’s guest writer for Marvin is Henny Youngman!

  10. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:06 am [Reply]

    I’ve read Henry for years. I have yet to see him do anything to deserve a whole candy bar named after himself.

  11. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:10 am [Reply]

    DtM – “You have one mouth and two ears, or handles, as some might call them.”

    MW – “Those boats look lovely. Think I’ll take a cruise. Wonder if Dad would like to come.”

    MT – I swear the squirrel is smiling. Probably planning to run old Andy to the brink of a heart attack. Hey, Reeky! You looking for a squirrel with a bad ‘tude?

  12. Chris B
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:10 am [Reply]

    So how is Slylock going to deal with the situation. Unauthorised gatherings of three or more people are forbidden? Fire without a permit? Drinking in public? Shirtless in public? There are such a wealth of ways to use the unchecked authority of the totalitarian state.

  13. McManx
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:13 am [Reply]

    Blondie — Given the majority of the panels was about beards and moustaches, the punch line about hair styles seemed a bit out of sync. About par for Dagwood, I guess.

  14. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:22 am [Reply]

    @McManx (#13): That’s the joke, son. Dag has weird hair. No amount of other facial hair will change that fact.

  15. CanuckDownSouth
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:23 am [Reply]

    Bizarro: If you have to caption your pun, it’s time to rethink using it at all.

    FW: The players hate their coach so much for setting up a stunt rather than actually being with them on the field for guidance that they deliberately kick-boxed the sides? Because seriously, how do you accidentally get your up-and-down trotting cleats to puncture tunnel sides which bulge out away from you?

    Pluggers: are there really volunteer ambulance services in some parts of the US? Firefighters, sure, but it’s got to be easier for some of the locals to train for that than to have a group of fully licensed EMTs on call unpaid. (Would the drivers be volunteers and the EMTs be paid positions?)

  16. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:24 am [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#10): To the editors, English teachers, and other grammar nitpickers: did I use the word “himself” properly in the linked comment?

  17. Horace Broon
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:24 am [Reply]

    FW: Also, the entire team has now inhaled microscopic fibres of whatever the tunnel was made from, and will be dead in a year.

    PV: The Red Hood? Has there been any hint that the guy who took over is a werewolf? Because that would be awesome.

  18. Peanut Gallery
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:26 am [Reply]

    MW – Consarn it, it was June who said “I want to see the boats!” Life just doesn’t make sense sometimes.

    “Efil! Efil!” Nope, I don’t understand it backwards either.

  19. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:28 am [Reply]

    @CanuckDownSouth (#15): Yesterthread I thought the caption should be: You’re a plugger if you spend more time in the back of an ambulance than working at your regular job.

  20. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:29 am [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#16): You would use “himself” only if Henry named the bar. That would make it a reflexive pronoun. If someone else named the bar, you would use “him.” Not having read the strip, I have no context.

  21. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:42 am [Reply]

    @Chaze (#20): Thanks. After I posted I realized the “himself” didn’t “reflect” onto anything. Damn television rotting my mind.

    I’ll save you some time: Henry is like Lio except without the edge and most of the humor. And lots of anachronistic ideas of gender roles.

  22. Peanut Gallery
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:45 am [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#10): Oh, I’m not so sure about that. I can imagine him flirting with the girls in a candy factory. But only to get free candy.

  23. Ed Dravecky
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:48 am [Reply]

    @CanuckDownSouth (#15): Yes. For example, Randy Cassingham (of This is True fame) is a certified EMT and a volunteer medic in the Ouray County (Colorado) Rural First Responder Corps.

  24. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:51 am [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#22): Hijinks ensue when that jealous blonde hussy dotted-line sees Henry. He escapes by hiding underneath a fat man’s overcoat. The fat man doesn’t notice because he’s reading a newspaper as he’s walking.

  25. Ed Dravecky
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:52 am [Reply]

    So is Funky Winkerbean going to drop the “put Les in a medically induced coma” plotline? I was really looking forward to that one.

  26. remmy
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:56 am [Reply]

    LUANN:OMG I laughed so hard today at this. Evans really zinged her and it was actually hilarious!

    9CL: What The Fuck?!?!! I am sure I will be deemed a beefwit, but what the hell is today’s comic about?

    FW: Can’t snark today – this actually was kinda funny and felt like a throwback to Batiuk’s funnier days with the strip.

  27. Nehemiah Scudder
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:57 am [Reply]

    @CanuckDownSouth (#15):Pluggers: are there really volunteer ambulance services in some parts of the US? Firefighters, sure, but it’s got to be easier for some of the locals to train for that than to have a group of fully licensed EMTs on call unpaid.

    Sure there are. Lots of small rural communities have volunteer ambulance services. They are usually affiliated with the volunteer fire department. Just google “volunteer emt” and you too can learn how to become one!

  28. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:02 am [Reply]

    fans of kung-fu grannies will like the Sunday Sinfest.

    B&C: surprisingly clever. English teachers everywhere will get a smile.

    9CL: Thorax locution; didn’t read.

    Blondie: fresh, funny. well played.

    AD: getting a grin from AD AND Blondie on the same day? go figure. *CRUNK*

    LaCuc: servicey!

    NAoQV: *golf clap*

    FW: *sad trombone*

    MW: service dogs! *applaz*

    rMC: good Steve, good boy.

  29. gleeb
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:06 am [Reply]

    A&J: Look out, Bill Griffith! Jimmy Johnson has cracked your pointless non sequitur code!

    Bizarro: The Mona Lisa is on panel, not canvas. Being an artist, you’d think Piraro would know that.

    Dick: So, let me get this straight. Moon Maid is making fraudulent charges to her daughter’s bank account, possibly in an attempt to make her clean her room. But where does the cannibalistic catfish guy come in? And why was Aquaman killed?

    ‘bean: Bull’s insistence on filling the tunnel with methane probably still won’t get him fired, no matter how many players are killed.

  30. Lenoxus
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:08 am [Reply]

    The answer to Slylock Fox is that Reeky’s punk pals will be swindled because they won’t actually get anything out of the deal.

  31. Peanut Gallery
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:09 am [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#24): “I was sorry because I had no candy. Then I saw a kid who had no mouth. That made me lose my appetite.”

  32. remmy
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:15 am [Reply]

    MW: last panel – Dawn wants someone to come along and do her from behind.

  33. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:18 am [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#31): Ha ha! Good one.

  34. TheDiva
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:21 am [Reply]

    SFx: Maybe Slylock Fox is really this world’s equivalent of Encyclopedia Brown (you know, apart from the whole solving-logic-puzzles-and-pretending-they’re-crimes thing). He doesn’t have any real jurisdiction or authority, but for a few cents he’ll trot over and pick holes in Bugs Meany’s Reeky Rat’s latest scam. The whole deerstalker-and-cape ensemble is just to placate his ego.

  35. Stroker Ace
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:23 am [Reply]

    Sick Chix: “I can put her down any day now. She has less then 8 days – maybe six”.

  36. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:24 am [Reply]

    for bb,u.

    Ian bomb.

    meanwhile, at Tobruk.

    Sheepish cuddles for True Fable.

    The Daily Puppy is a Coonhound mix.

    ikkle corgi-mix. *brainmush*

    The Power of corgi eyes compels you.

  37. Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:24 am [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#16): Perfectly fine to use it as an intensifier, as you yourself did there. Merriam Webster’s Dictionary of English Usage (1989), generally approves of it, giving lots of examples of writers from Shakespeare to James Joyce using the form. The OED has examples going back to Middle English.

    There are times when using myself, yourself, himself, etc., instead of me, you, him, can seem affected, or spoil the rhythm of a sentence. Don’t worry about it too much. Read it out loud, and if it sounds ok, it is.

  38. Red Greenback
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:26 am [Reply]

    Bob Weber, Jr. is trying to convince us that 3 punks are having a nighttime cookout on the beach. Red Greenback calls shenanigans. Why?

    (upside-down lettering): The light area of the crescent moon is pointing up, which means the sun would be relatively high in the sky.

    Come quietly, you’re going before the owl, Bob.

  39. debussy fields
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:30 am [Reply]

    MW– Yeah, we’re all trying, Wilbur. But there’s nobody more trying than you.

  40. Amy Stephenson
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:32 am [Reply]

    I misread the line in today’s FW as “I warned them to keep away from the sides with THE spikes,” and thought for a moment that there might have been bloodshed, which would have explained the color of the explosive blast a bit better. And I was briefly in awe of the ruthlessness of the setup. Next game: a moat of boiling oil for the band members to jump over during the halftime show.

  41. btown
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:38 am [Reply]

    Pluggers: Does the Pluggerville ambulance fleet come equipped with rotisseries?

  42. Hamlet
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:38 am [Reply]

    How do we know Reeky can’t do 1000 push ups? Who knows what these human animal hybrids are capable of?

  43. debussy fields
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:38 am [Reply]

    MW– From start to finish, today’s Mary Worth is written with great confusion. The cryptic quotation starts the whole thing, perhaps giving us a clue as to what’s to come. Mary says she suggested volunteering at the hospital to dawn. Did she mean from dusk to dawn? Wilbur says, “She’s returning to school soon, Mary. Do you think that’s best?” The next two panels work whether the two of them are referring to Dawn going back to school or to Mary’s idea for Dawn to volunteer at the hospital. “We all do, Mary,” has a completely different meaning if that comma is removed. And, as was stated earlier, Wilbur’s statement about trying can be interpreted in more than one way. I think Moy hit a grand slam here today.

  44. Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:39 am [Reply]

    @CanuckDownSouth (#15): Bizarro: If you have to caption your pun, it’s time to rethink using it at all.

    Yes, yes. But this a Sunday tradition with Bizarro! Note that this is the 25th reader suggested pun Sunday strip. It is supposed to be bad! That’s the charm of it. (Though the “pair o’ Sauls” one IS particularly weak).

    // What bothers me is that there are supposed to be seven secret symbols, and I can only find six: bunny, pie, dynamite, flying saucer, inverted bird, eyeball. I’m sure there’s a “K2″ buried in there somewhere, but I don’t see it.

  45. TheDiva
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:39 am [Reply]

    9CL: Don’t blame him, Thorax. If it walks like a Plugger, dresses like a Plugger and has the substantial girth of a Plugger…

    BRSG: Worth a chuckle, but more importantly, isn’t that the stupidest of all stupid interview questions? Who knows where I’ll be in ten years? If ten years ago someone had said to me “a decade from now, you will be married to a man you haven’t even met yet, you’ll have two kids, and you’ll be working from home copywriting and creating a web series snarking on bad musicals,” I would have asked them to take their meds.

    C’shaft: Well, you’ll just have to throw the lunchbox at him. Try to aim so the thermos hits his head.

    FW: Ha-ha, and the resulting explosion killed two and injured ten!

    Luann: That….explains a lot.

    Marvin: Ha-ha, nagging backseat driver women, amirite?

    MW: Next, Mary will try to meddle away Dawn’s now-crippling fear of going out on the water.

  46. Hamlet
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:43 am [Reply]

    Today’s classic Peanuts was copied by Watterson.

  47. Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:51 am [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#21): @Chaze (#20): Thanks. After I posted I realized the “himself” didn’t “reflect” onto anything. Damn television rotting my mind.

    No, it’s still ok. “Himself” merely substitutes for “him”. As an intensifier, meaning something like him, underlined. Seriously, check the usage manuals. If it’s good enough for the KJV, Robert Frost, Flannery O’Connor, Emily Dickenson, and James Thurber, it ought to be good enough for anybody.

  48. Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:59 am [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#31): The Harlan Ellison story IS disturbing.

  49. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:01 am [Reply]

    Archie – No, Archie’s not watching TV. Notice the rabbit ears? There’s no such thing as a TV signal that could be brought in with rabbit ears without a set-top adaptor, which is not shown. As a result, Slylock found him guilty of several recent unexplained robberies.

    Calvin Curtis – “Who, me? Who… me? Who? Me?”

  50. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:03 am [Reply]

    Dick – A little hard to read today. I made it through the text item about Kathy Mazza and the police officers and firefighters who died on 9/11/2001, and now there seem to be some sort of tears in my eyes.

  51. Mibbitmaker
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:04 am [Reply]

    A&J: Men and their technology, amirite?
    I dunno — let’s ask all those texting teen girls about that…

    Garfield: Not this again, baby!

    JP: Laced with what, Bea?

    Luann: Goody, can we see her get hurt in some Travelocity commercials?

    MW: Oop, isn’t that how many George Costanza calamities have started, Dawn…?

  52. Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:08 am [Reply]

    @Chaze (#20): I’ve read Henry for years. I have yet to see him do anything to deserve a whole candy bar named after himself.

    I believer you are mistaken. Now, substitute “him” for “himself” in the second sentence. Read it out loud. Doesn’t sound right, does it?

  53. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:10 am [Reply]

    Henry really “blew” that gag, eh Readers?

    Herb – Alas, the last line “So just by F-ing, I have a good time” turned out to be a bit of an optical illusion.

  54. John C Fremont
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:11 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#50): I second that emotion. Very well done.

  55. hogenmogen
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:13 am [Reply]

    Sly: They’re drinking beer (not allowed on the beach) in glass bottles (not allowed on the beach) and roasting up flesh of fellow mammals over a bonfire (not allowed on the beach) while the inky black tide of an offshore oil spil washes up on shore. Slylock is worried that Reeky’s “punk” friends might get scammed for ten bucks?

  56. Poteet
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:14 am [Reply]

    9CL — Yep, that’s life out here in the country. City slickers get out of their cars clutching road maps and walk up to us and ask directions and then they condescend and then we flip ‘em the verbal bird. And then we go back to vaguely waiting around for the next one. Brooke nailed it.

  57. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:17 am [Reply]

    Judge – Right after Avery says “massive” and “bust,” Bea shows up. Coincidence?

    Mary – Sigh. That guy I’ve totally forgotten all about used to stare at the “ocean” set.

  58. Poteet
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:19 am [Reply]

    SLYLOCK — I’m surprised Slylock hasn’t started spending his time arguing with animals who say wrong things on the Internets. That may be the next step.

  59. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:24 am [Reply]

    Pluggers – You’re not a plugger if you’re offended by continual assertions that you are one. So relax.

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#y266): It’s a perfectly fine quote. It’s like William Jennings Bryan said in his immortal “Cross of Gold” speech: “Gold bad.”

  60. Poteet
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:24 am [Reply]

    MT — Can’t argue with plugging a nice worthy cause. Can gently point out that when it comes to responsible dog ownership, past stories indicate that Mark could definitely use a lesson or two.

  61. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:25 am [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#31): I was sorry because I had no candy. Then I saw a kid who had no mouth. That made me lose my appetite.

    Har! Good one.

    And actually, it’s even worse.

    Henry has a butt on his face, right where his mouth should be.

    Trust me, you do not want to watch him eat a chocolate bar.

  62. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:27 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#61): In fact, now that I think about it, it’s kind of hard to look at Henry blowing that golf ball without hearing a huge raspberry sound effect.

  63. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:27 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker (#47): I think your offbase, Nehemiah. Based on the original post, the reflexive pronoun was not used as an intensifier (as in “he, himself.”) just as your garden variety reflexive pronoun.

  64. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:28 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker (#52): Sounds perfectly fine to me.

  65. Peanut Gallery
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:29 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#61):

    Henry has a butt on his face, right where his mouth should be.
    Trust me, you do not want to watch him eat a chocolate bar.

    It can only be understood backwards.

  66. pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:29 am [Reply]

    @lorne (#1): Sid Vicious was named for a pet hamster he shared with John Lydon.

  67. hogenmogen
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:31 am [Reply]

    Blondie: I’m with the barber. Bizarre, out of fashion facial hair will definitely take everyone’s eyes off Dag’s bizarre, out of fashion cranial hair. Essentially, the barber knows that Dag’s patronage scares away his other customers. Imagine living with the weight of knowing that you are poised to clip those screaming strands of heavily gelled protien just begging for a coif, and yet not doing them justice.

  68. Poteet
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:36 am [Reply]

    MW — I know several college students and they all hold down jobs to help pay for their schooling. Does Dawn have a trust fund, or does she have never-seen wealthy guardians, or does Wilbur do a brisk trade in blackmail to supplement his ASK WENDY salary, or what? Maybe that ten-acre pot field in JP (and that’s a jaw-dropping amount of pot!) is a long-distance Charterstone project, contracted out to local management. When Charterstone residents stand around the pool, they are congratulating each other on their collective untaxed profits.

  69. Liam
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:53 am [Reply]

    MW-”Volunteering at the hospital with Mary or suicide,” Dawn thinks to herself. “Oh well. It’s been a good life.”

    Slylock Fox-”Now, Max, let me show you how to dig a shallow grave.”

  70. Henning Makholm
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:54 am [Reply]

    Anyone who feels “swindled” that they don’t get to see Reeky do 1000 pushups at the same time deserves what they get. What does it even mean to do more than one pushup at a time, rather than several single ones sequentially?

  71. un malpaso
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:55 am [Reply]

    Man, stay out of the path of Slylock when he’s on one of his Night Beach-Watch Walks. Dude is worse than Judge Dredd. He’ll obviously whack you with his walking bludgeon if he just overhears you talking trash with your friends… God forbid he catches a whiff of pot smoke. You’ll be chewing on the bars of Ferret Prison for a long time if that happens.

  72. Jim C
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:58 am [Reply]

    Slylock does a mean Wizard Whitebeard impression today.

  73. Señor Tortilla
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:58 am [Reply]

    9CL: Thorax alert! Thorax alert!

    DT: Did Dick Tracy leave Moon Maid, his daughter-in-law, to die? That was Gould-era Tracy, not the DT of recent times.

    Luann: Wow.

    MT: The recent MT storyline has a “stench of death” about it–sort of like the last DT strip Locher drew.

    FW: Two problems with this: one–those things are expensive. A football team with serious budget problems could not afford one. Two–those things are reinforced.

  74. pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:58 am [Reply]

    One of the perks of being a soon-to-be-unemployed pastor is that my Sunday obligations are decreasing. And by “decreasing,” I really mean “I don’t have to put as much effort into them anymore.” Hopefully, this will result in more and better snark.[*]

    Amazing Spider-Man: I can haz finale nao, pleez? Spider-Man go bye-bye?

    Apt. 3-G: Of course, Aristotle’s mom also laced her lamb with yogurt and arsenic, so there’s that.

    9 Chickweed Lane: It’s as unfunny as always, but it reminds me of a story told about the theologian Stanley Hauerwas, who is renowned, among other things, for his potty mouth. Story goes that Hauerwas is visiting Harvard, and being unfamiliar with the grounds, stops a couple of undergraduates. “Excuse me,” he says. “Can you tell me where the library’s at?”

    “Sir,” one of the undergraduates replies in a state of high dudgeon, “I don’t know where you’re from, but here at Harvard, we don’t end interrogatories with a preposition.”

    Hauerwas pauses to take this in. “Allow me to rephrase my question he says.”

    “Of course,” the undergrad says. “It’s only proper.”

    “Where’s the library at, asshole?”

    Cul de Sac: You don’t want to know what I would do to own a full-color print of this strip. You just don’t. Asshole.

    Dick Tracy: “But Dad and Pop Pop told me she died in an explosion!” “We tried, kid. We tried.”

    Dilbert: I don’t think Scott Adams should do jokes about irrational, angry women.

    Fred Basset: Is “Apple pie for pudding” British sex code?

    Even Henry does stupid golf jokes now? Remind me to read up on the sport and start pitching jokes. Easy money, my friend, easy money.

    Judge Parker: Even money that Avery jumps Bea or jumps Bea, if you know what I mean.

    Mary Worth: Dawn is thinking. “If I go to the Coast Guard Academy and then join the Merchant Marine, in twenty years I can crash my cruise ship into the Italian coast and finish Wilbur once and for all.”[*]

    Today’s Prince Valiant is much more fun if you replace the dialog with an argument about not bogarting the bong. In fact, I may just do that.

    Rex Morgan, M.D.: Oh, crap. “It’s only three days!” You know what that means. This story arc will not conclude before Christmas.

    True, Zippy, true.

  75. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:00 pm [Reply]

    @hogenmogen (#67): You know, come to think of it, The Situation on Jersey Shore is just about as close to Dagwood as I’ve seen in real life. Snooky? She ain’t no Blondie, dat’s for sure!

  76. Downpuppy
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:08 pm [Reply]

    Slylock always leaves me on the wrong side of (evildoer caught in discrepancy) vs (assumed trait of anthropomorphic animals). If any children are accidentally exposed to this strip, wouldn’t they be noting that “pushups” are simply meaningless to a rat?

  77. Steve
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:22 pm [Reply]

    SFx solution: Reeky Rat has four digits on each hand, so he expresses numbers in base eight. When we convert to base ten, he’s offering to do 512 pushups for 8 dollars. The swindle is that his friends think they’re paying 1 cent per pushup, when they’re really paying 1.5625 cents per pushup.

  78. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:29 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker (#47): Are you sure? Are you quite sure?

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#61): That’s an image I didn’t need to have on a Sunday. Or any day ending in “y” for that matter.

  79. Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:29 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#63): @Chaze (#64): Perhaps intensifier was not the mot juste. “Himself” in Baka’s sentence is used for emphasis, that is, emphasizing the “himness” of the object.

    Merriam-Websters guide, which I referred to earlier, allows that some usage commentators over the last century have objected to this kind of use, but concludes, “…the practice of substituting myself or other reflexive pronouns for ordinary personal pronouns is not new… and is not rare.” They give examples of distinguished writers using this form over a period of four centuries, and conclude that it has to be considered Standard English.

    I think that the special rules some sources cite for reflexive pronouns are artificial, and not useful, like the old rule about never splitting an infinitive.

    And finally, and most importantly, to my ears, the “himself” in Baka’s post just sounds more natural, and “him” does not. Honestly, would you had noticed the “error” if he had not brought it up himself?

  80. NoahSnark
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:30 pm [Reply]

    Smart enough to understand English, but ignorant enough to not know how she got pregnant, Sweetie was soon offered her own series on The Learning Channel.

  81. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:31 pm [Reply]

    @Steve (#77): I’m with you. The “solution” in the strip is just plain mistaken.

    My first thought was that he was going to do them in the lake, where the water’s buoyancy would make them easier. Then I figured he’d drown around #75.

  82. SurrealKangaroo
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:33 pm [Reply]

    I am surprised you didn’t make a comment on Blondie, with all of those terrifying Dagwood-hybrids and all.

  83. Digger
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:37 pm [Reply]

    Reeky’s not pulling a scam, he’s just making outrageous boasts because he’s bombed out of his mind. “For ten bucks, I’ll do a hundred pushups. No, wait, a thousand. I do a thousand pushups. What, you don’t think I can? C’mere, raccoon, I’ll kick your ass! No, wait, I love you guys!”

  84. Gal Friday
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:39 pm [Reply]

    @un malpaso (#71):

    LOL!

    SF: and look at poor Max: he so wants to join the punks just this once for a little fun . . .

  85. Scalawag
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:46 pm [Reply]

    What bothers me more than the dubiousness of Reeky’s “swindling” is the breakdown of Slylock Fox‘s normally stark black-and-white morality. As far as I can remember it’s always Slylock unraveling the attempts of unsavory types like Reeky to take advantage of innocent bunnies or beavers or whatever, whose only flaw is being overly trusting or meek. Surely these “punks” deserve the consequences of their own greed/stupidity?

  86. Ursula
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

    @Horace Broon (#17): Awesome indeed. Today’s PV has great dialogue, but the close-ups are disturbing. The artists are safer with scenery, sword-play and monsters.

  87. KreatureFeatures
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:51 pm [Reply]

    Funky Winkerbean: This has never happened and is in fact physically impossible.
    You’ll see what I mean: High school giant inflatable helmet football team entrance.

  88. Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker
    September 9th, 2012 at 12:57 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#78): William Safire, one of the more prescriptive usage commentators, called a similar use by President Carter, “unstylish, though not incorrect.”

    I disagree on the unstylish. It sounds perfectly natural to me. It is perfectly common in normal English usage.

    Technically, “him”, in your 2nd sentence, is a direct substitute for “Henry” in the first. So the subject/object sense of the 2nd sentece is “Henry himself”, a perfectly valid use of a reflexive pronoun as emphasis.

    So yes, I’m sure your use was perfectly correct.

  89. kkarenb
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

    Shylock Fox – Wow, with that hairdo, Reeky Rat could be a Mark Trail villain. I do not follow Shylock’s strip, so I had never really looked at Reeky before. He is one evil-looking dude.

    Mary Worth – Does anyone else see a note of finality in today’s strip? Are we finally moving on to something else?

  90. bats :[
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:08 pm [Reply]

    Slylock Fox : trumped-up charges :: Mary Worth : meddling

  91. Poteet
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

    PV — Dang, I missed last week, wherein Gawain fell for the bandit leader as I hoped he would. Alas for him and fortunately for her, it will be temporary. Meanwhile, Val has a wonderful sucking-up expression. Diplomacy indeed.

  92. bats :[
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:21 pm [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#18): If it were only true…June looking at the boats in San Diego Harbor…wearing her new thong…assuming the position that we see Dawn Weston in in the last panel.
    Is it Fleet Week yet?

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#28): we had breakfast at Denny’s, and after mr bats :[ read the Sunday 9CL online, I explained to him what tl; dr was. I like your paraphase, though!

    @btown (#41): opleaseopleaseoplease

    @John C Fremont (#54): very nice tribute.

  93. bats :[
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:32 pm [Reply]

    RMMD: Oh noez!!1! Chekov’s cell phone!

  94. Nehemiah Scudder
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:32 pm [Reply]

    @KreatureFeatures (#87): That was kind of cool, though I was disappointed when the tunnel did not explode. The team’s called the Columbus Exploders, right?

  95. Santa Royale With Cheese
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:36 pm [Reply]

    SfX: Maybe it’s still too early in the morning for me, but how exactly is Reeky Rat scamming anyone if he actually does 1000 push-ups, albeit spread out over time? Scamming, as I understand it, would be more like Reeky taking the $10, doing 0 push-ups, and constantly promising to do them tomorrow.

    Also I thought the cop-out was going to be that the tide would roll in and he’d float on the water while simulating push-ups or something (less work, in other words).

    S-M: And again, this circus thing was Spidey’s idea. Geeeenius!

    JP: I’m not sure I want to know what sort of movie Avery is inspired to make by a photo of a pot farm. “The hills are aliiiiiiive, with the smell of GANJA…”

  96. There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:36 pm [Reply]

    @remmy (#32): Dawn wants someone to come along and do her from behind.

    Sigh, Dave used to bend me over the rail like this.

    @Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker (#88): So the subject/object sense of the 2nd sentence is “Henry himself”, a perfectly valid use of a reflexive pronoun as emphasis.

    Use of “myself” for “me” always prompts predictable sarcasm from my husband, who parrots the speaker, but substitutes “my very own self.” But, as far as I’m concerned, it rarely matters much, myself.

  97. Uncle Lumpy
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:41 pm [Reply]

    @remmy (#26):

    9CL: What The Fuck?!?!! I am sure I will be deemed a beefwit, but what the hell is today’s comic about?

    Random McTourist tries to out-asshole Thorax, and is bested: no one is allowed to be a bigger asshole than Thorax.

  98. Kwazzymodo
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

    Check out Animal Planet’s newest reality show – I Was Pregnant And Didn’t Know It! Follow Sweetie as she deals with impending motherhood all while keeping up with her demands as some clueless woman’s companion.

  99. pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:47 pm [Reply]

    @Steve (#77): …Ssssooo Reeky Rat is a vulture capitalist preparing himself for a life of tending soulless computer algorithms as they make microtrades on Wall Street?

    I’ll buy it.

  100. Yahtzee
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:50 pm [Reply]

    Reeky and his pals are having a weenie roast on the seashore! That’s so wholesome the Riverdale gang would write them off as “Squaresville,” which tells you just how high that bar has been set.

  101. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:51 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker (#79): Nope. Wouldn’t have noticed and wouldn’t have cared, certainly not in a forum such as this. He asked a question and I answered it in the same way I would have answered it in my classroom after 30+ years of teaching English. I am not a grammar nazi. Obviously, his own usage struck Baka as not being quite right, so he asked the question.

  102. There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:51 pm [Reply]

    Shylock Isn’t it possible that they know full well that Reeky means to do 1,000 pushups over a series of days or weeks, but, well, maybe they just want Reeky to do some exercise once in a while, ever think of that?

    Even if it is a sort of scam, Reeky wouldn’t collect on his bet until he delivered, would he? And that could be days or weeks. Is Shylock going to hang around that long waiting to nab Reeky at the payoff?

    MW Well, Mary has all the answers, doesn’t she? If Dawn continues in the misery of her meaningless life she has only herself to blame. Mary gave her the only solution. Ignore Mary’s advice at your own peril, Dawn!

    Luann Aha! And is Brad descended from a pig? After all, if flu can jump from pigs to humans, couldn’t the deGroots have done it, too?

    FW Ah, the Funkyverse, where any cause for celebration is overshadowed by tragedy, disappointment, and loss.

  103. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 1:54 pm [Reply]

    @kkarenb (#89): Hmmm….finality? Maybe Dawn plans on enlisting in the Navy?

  104. Daniel
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:03 pm [Reply]

    SF More to the point, how are we supposed to rationally deduce the “solution” from the picture given? Is this a Powell Memo ploy to teach children a universal, suffocating sense of mistrust by teaching them to deduce–theoretically, even without having read any other SF comic, and thus without knowing anything about Reeky’s past–that Reeky is unreliable, based solely on name and/or appearance?

  105. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:05 pm [Reply]

    I admit to missing details in many strips before I became a ‘mudge and the Cranky Finkerbean strips are not featured in my local paper, so I’ve had to research them online to get up to speed. So, today, I notice that their sports teams are named The Scapegoats. Really? Scapegoats? I am very familiar with the negative worldview expressed in these strips, but naming your sports teams Scapegoats is tantamount to saying, “I’m a miserable SOB and life is shit, even high school sports. Please enjoy my strip.”

    // I don’t think even Brooke is that cynical.

  106. bbofun
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:05 pm [Reply]

    9CL- The only way I’ll buy this whole premise is if this is a “thing” that’s going around. Is Dr. Phil, or Oprah, or some other self-help sort going around saying “when you meet a stranger, always try to leave behind a bit of personal philosophy?” I can sort of see that as a “movement”, like the :pay t forward” idea, to try to get people to relate more to each other. But it isn’t, is it? It’s just Brooke, unable to tell a joke. Again.

    Actually, I think he was trying to play off an idea of city-slickers thinking of rural-dwellers as being colorful characters. like on The Andy Griffith Show, or in Barney Google and SNUFFY SMITH. Of course, that’s not really a stereotype nowadays as much as it once was, so, it’s just Brooke, unable to tell a joke. Again.
    (Each time I wrote “Brooke” in the paragraphs above, I originally wrote it as “Brroke.” Paging Dr. Freud!)

    FW- i’m not actually bothered by the fact that those sort of inflated helmets can’t actually “pop” like that- it’s a joke, after all. It’s that you can’t get away from the visual of the football team needing to pretty much be walking like the Minister of Silly Walks in order for them to even potentially puncture the sides of the helmet. So, it’s just Tom, unable to tell a joke. Again. (RULE OF 3)

  107. bats :[
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:07 pm [Reply]

    @There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm (#102): re MW: what’s the MOST IMPORTANT thing is it’s a Pithy Quotation Sunday! Yippee!

  108. bbofun
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:08 pm [Reply]

    Damn. that should be “pay it forward” in the first paragraph. Damn keyboard. always typing the letters I hit, rather than the ones I want. (Although I guess autocorrect is the “solution” to that- a solution that seems worse than the disease.)

  109. billman
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:11 pm [Reply]

    @great advertisement (#107):

    SPAM! and almost real sentences.

  110. There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (y#102): Re: Solo sax mouthpiece – could it have been Peter Brötzmann?

    http://www.allmusic.com/album/14-love-poems-plus-10-more-mw0000363832

    I checked with my friend who was a former DJ at WREK, and he said Brötzmann was the first to come to mind.

  111. There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:26 pm [Reply]

    @bats :[ (#108): True, true. Kierkegaard (and his disciple Mary) may believe life must be lived forward, but who could deny the wisdom of Sir Mix-A-Lot, who clearly advocates for understanding the backward view.

  112. John C Fremont
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:29 pm [Reply]

    @billman (#110): Its name doesn’t even attempt to hide that it’s spam. Good, honest spam.

    Plus, it borrowed its W’s from the Average White Band. Pick up the pieces, alright!

  113. Red Greenback
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:29 pm [Reply]

    Note to self: Use the word eponymous when applicable.

  114. Anonymous
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:35 pm [Reply]

  115. The Ridger
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:36 pm [Reply]

    Reflexive pronouns refer back to the subject of the sentence. In this case there’s a bit of interference coming from the causative construction.

    They named the candy bar after Henry / after him = have the same meaning
    Henry named the candy bar after himself / after him != have the same meaning

    But here, he had the candy bar named after himself = caused them to name it

    So while normally either pronoun would work, I’d suggest using “him” to avoid the ambiguity.

  116. Nehemiah Scudder
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:38 pm [Reply]

    @There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm (#111): Only one piece on that album was sax mouthpiece alone, so I’m thinking it’s probably not him, or not this album anyway. Too bad there weren’t samples.

    I like how the music is described as “post-free solo reeds playing”. I know about “free jazz”. I guess post-free jazz is even free-er. Or less free? Unfree jazz?

    Academic labels like that make my head hurt. Like Modern Art, and Post-Modern Art. And Post-Post Modern Art.

    // But nothing beats the fifty some distinct varieties of metal music listed by Wikipedia.

  117. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:50 pm [Reply]

    @There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm (#112): Sir Mix-a-Lot wouldn’t give Dawn a second look. Bootilicious is not a word to describe Dawn or anyone else in the Worthiverse.

  118. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:51 pm [Reply]

    What kind of reflexive pronoun war did I start? Looking back I understand this was a complex question but I was living forward and didn’t foresee the controversy.

  119. Zerowolf
    September 9th, 2012 at 2:58 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#2): Which is the worst of the two, being surrounded by clowns or Spidey being your only hope?

  120. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:02 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#119): Naw…you’re okay. No harm done. I have only one true beef with misuse of reflexive pronouns and that is within “copspeak” where they are unflaggingly used as subjects.

    You asked a good question and received some very interesting answers. William Safire, I am not.

  121. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:04 pm [Reply]

    @Zerowolf (#120): When you really think about it, isn’t Spidey a clown, too? Unintentionally, maybe, but a clown nonetheless.

  122. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:07 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#117): Nehemiah, I still have my alto sax. I am perfectly willing to take the mouthpiece off and warble as many tunes as you would like. I’ll record them on whatever format works for you. If I’m a hit, maybe it’ll be the start of a new career for me!

  123. pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:07 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#119): You will simply have to make a leap of faith into believing it’s worthwhile to continue posting here. Otherwise, you will have to become a knight of infinite resignation.[*]

  124. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:08 pm [Reply]

    @Zerowolf (#120): That’s an excellent question. I’d say they’re even. Surrounded by clowns is a sphincter-puckering nightmare. Spiderman being my only hope for salvation from any situation not involving the savior being disabled, that’ll suck out my will to live faster than Mary Worth can spit out a platitude.

    @Chaze (#122): AAAAAH! I didn’t need to think about that.

  125. pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:09 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#117): If academic labels make you hurt, you should probably stay away from the almost infinite variety of Christian labels. At least without a glass of scotch nearby.

  126. Baka Gaijin
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:09 pm [Reply]

  127. Derdrom
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:17 pm [Reply]

    You don’t see a punk aesthetic? I see a backwards baseball cap and a robber’s mask! Wait, is that racial profiling?

  128. Zerowolf
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:21 pm [Reply]

    A3G: “Well as my completely bat-shit crazy step-mother used to say, ‘Don’t make me shoot your ass.’”

  129. Zerowolf
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:23 pm [Reply]

    Father forgive me for I have sinned, I chuckled (without a hint of irony) at Funky Winkerbean.

  130. Zerowolf
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:25 pm [Reply]

    RMMD: Yes, June, it will be the same moon. You’re only flying across the country, you aren’t taking a rocket to another planet.

  131. Oregonian
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:32 pm [Reply]

    @Santa Royale With Cheese (#95): “I thought the cop-out was going to be that the tide would roll in and he’d float on the water while simulating push-ups or something (less work, in other words).”

    Exactly! That’s what I thought too. Why else would Reeky be pointing at the moon?

    We may be overthinking Slylock Fox.

  132. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:45 pm [Reply]

    @remmy (#26): Re: 9CL, as best I can tell it’s “This man is a twerp! Thorax is an asshole! Haw! Haw!” – only with more words, because, you know, 9CL.

    //I loathe Thorax, so I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’d love to see him try to take on Mary Worth in full platitude mode.

  133. There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:54 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#118): Bootilicious is not a word to describe Dawn or anyone else in the Worthiverse.

    Yes, no doubt true. Ian and Wilbur are rotund, but probably both assless chaps.

  134. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    September 9th, 2012 at 3:59 pm [Reply]

    @pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe (#74): I believe you can order prints from GoComics, if you like.

  135. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:00 pm [Reply]

    @There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm (#134): Ian and Wilbur…assless chaps.

    Cannot unsee!

  136. There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:09 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#117): … I’m thinking it’s probably not him, or not this album anyway. Too bad there weren’t samples.

    Perhaps one of his other 50 albums, “Nipples,” “Balls,” “Nothung,” “More Nipples”…

    Samples on iTunes and Amazon.

  137. There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:09 pm [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#136): Under that kilt lurks…

  138. tallyHO
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:14 pm [Reply]

    @Oregonian (#132):

    We may be overthinking Slylock Fox.

    That’s unpossible!

    The cartoon doesn’t sync up with the conundrum presented. That is probably very forgivable. As with most of BW, Jr’s cartoon drawings, there’s so much going on that they are funny and come across as being just a bit more absurd than he intends them to be.

    (Bad) Poems could be written about what’s happening in that drawing.

    “Bird.
    Sleeping Bird.
    Fly, Fly.
    Night sky.
    You missing
    out
    on
    Weenie
    Roasts.
    SleepFly On,
    Bird.”

    Then there’s those two crabs. I didn’t even think crabs had mouths but that little one…it ain’t happy.

    Then there’s the fact that two rats are eating hot dogs. Hot Dogs. Long thought to have rat parts in the unofficial ingredients.
    Then there’s the fact that Slylock doesn’t seem to know how to enjoy life on a beach on a Summer night. Those three varmints are just hanging out, doing no wrong. Slylock should take a chill pill and then take Max night-swimming.

  139. Nehemiah Scudder
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:14 pm [Reply]

    @The Ridger (#115):
    Original sentences: “I’ve read Henry for years. I have yet to see him do anything to deserve a whole candy bar named after himself.”

    I don’t see any logical ambiguity there, and I don’t think anyone reading the two sentences could realistically misconstrue the meaning. “Himself” replaces “him” (which is grammatically legal) which replaces “Henry” from the first sentence (which is also grammatically legal).

    Indeed, the idea that Henry, as a comic strip character, was so entertaining that it (or he) somehow compelled the candy company to name a confection “Oh Henry”, makes a certain amount of sense. Of course, Baka was saying the opposite: that Henry was not good enough to deserve that honor, which actually makes better sense.

    Question. If you rewrote the 2nd sentence as, “I have yet to see Henry do anything to deserve a whole candy bar named after himself,” would purists object, or would they still insist on “him”?

  140. Chance
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:14 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder, amateur nitpicker (#52): I believer you are mistaken in writing “I believer,” nitpicker.

  141. OMEGA SUPREME
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:16 pm [Reply]

    Mary Worth, last panel: Dawn’s in college, right? Homina, homina.

  142. Nehemiah Scudder
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:26 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#121): I have only one true beef with misuse of reflexive pronouns and that is within “copspeak” where they are unflaggingly used as subjects.

    Everybody’s ok. Very interesting discussion.

    But I must point out, about the use of reflexive pronouns as subjects:

    Myself hath often overheard them say — Shaks, Titus Andronicus 1594

    My selfe am so neare drowning — Ben Johnson, Ode 1601

    Myself when young did eagerly frequent — Fitzgerald, Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam 1859

    Somehow myself survived the night — Emily Dickinson, 1871

    // Who knew that cops were so poetic?

  143. Nehemiah Scudder
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:27 pm [Reply]

    @Chance (#141): Conceded. Cheerfully. There are some things spell check cannot help us with.

  144. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:34 pm [Reply]

    @billman (#110): What I like is those little Greek characters it uses for double-yous. Any second now, it’s going to break out in Walt Disney signatures.

    @Oregonian (#132): We may be overthinking Slylock Fox.
    I think he’s just moping around because his real foes aren’t around. Count Weirdly? At the Mad Science Fair (as seen in “The Tick”). Cassandra? Nope. Smitty? No Slick, Slylock.

  145. Alison
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:39 pm [Reply]

    “Mary Worth”: What’s with that mutant sun in the background? it’s enormous! And why is the sky bright blue if the sun is setting? Or maybe it’s rising? How early does Dawn get up to go look at boats, exactly?

    Plus, Dawn looks awfully depressed for someone who’s supposedly excited to turn her life around. That look on her face is not the look of someone who’s realized she is lucky to be alive. It’s more of a “I see a boat. Dave always wanted to own a boat. Dave said he would take me sailing one day. I wish I was dead” look.

  146. Nehemiah Scudder
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:43 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#123): Nehemiah, I still have my alto sax. I am perfectly willing to take the mouthpiece off and warble as many tunes as you would like. I’ll record them on whatever format works for you. If I’m a hit, maybe it’ll be the start of a new career for me!

    I think I speak for everyone here: We shall follow your future musical career with great interest.

    // No point in delaying! If it were done when ’tis done, then ’twere well, it were done quickly. Huddie Ledbetter.[*] You could have something up on YouTube in a couple of hours, tops. Do you know the theme to Gilligan’s Island?

  147. commodorejohn
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:48 pm [Reply]

    A3G – “Something wonderful has come up, Margo!” Luann’s pregnant! She learned about it from today’s Six Chix.

    Blondie – Okay, most of these are just kinda dopey, but Dagwood as Dalí nearly made me spew perfectly good mead on my laptop. Has Dean Young been hanging out with Dan Piraro of late?

    DTM – Does Dennis’s teacher suffer from Grave’s disease?

    DT – “Oh, no, Honey, that’s your aunt Gladys. We don’t talk much, since she got into Scientology.”

    JP – You know, I think I really do believe that Bea is the Coffee Fairy. It just seems right, somehow.

    Luann – Luann’s great-great grandfather is Aaron Hill with a beard? Yeah, Greg Evans sure breaks the mold with his character designs. (I’d remark on the retroactive incest overtones, but this is Luann, that’s basically the daily grind here.)

    MT – The unspoken message in today’s Mark Trail: adopting a pet is a gamble! Sure, you might wind up with an Andy, but on the other hand, you might get stuck with a Sassy.

    MW – Man, they have bright freaking sunsets in California.

    PBS – Aww.

    Phantom – Boomsby warden! Eschews articles! Speaks only in exclamations!

    PV – “Pose, and…just a minute here…wham! Match cut!

    RMMD – On today’s Rex Morgan, the Morgans blithely discuss how Sarah’s control over them is growing. It’s great to live in Peaksville! Certainly better than living in the cornfield!

    SF – On today’s Sally Forth, Sally’s gradual transformation into her husband accelerates. Stay tuned for the upcoming week, when she digs out her old Jem tapes!

    SM – To paraphrase Crow T. Robot, I have almost no respect for pumas spiders now. I now know that if I ever run into a spider, I can just push it the hell over.

  148. Nehemiah Scudder
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:49 pm [Reply]

    @There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm (#137): Perhaps one of his other 50 albums, “Nipples,” “Balls,” “Nothung,” “More Nipples”… Is there a kind of theme to his work? Shouldn’t that third one be “No thong”?

    // Note RMMD reference. On topic!

  149. John C Fremont
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:52 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#139): Bad poetry. Sounds like a Leonard Pinth-Garnell sketch.

  150. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 4:53 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#147): Gee, I have no idea if my aumbuscher is in any shape to play, which for this enterprise may not be a bad thing (Groucho Marx cigar wag.)

  151. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    September 9th, 2012 at 5:37 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#148): ‘Perhaps one of his other 50 albums, “Nipples,” “Balls,” “Nothung,” “More Nipples”…’
    Is there a kind of theme to his work? Shouldn’t that third one be “No thong”?

    The words ran together. It was “Not Hung.”

  152. Miss Prunelly
    September 9th, 2012 at 5:39 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#10): The correct usage to express the meaning that selfsame individual to whom reference was just made is, of course, “his own self”. At least here in Hootin’ Holler.

  153. Nehemiah Scudder
    September 9th, 2012 at 5:40 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#151): Oh, thanks. Bet you’re a wiz at crosswords.

  154. Liam
    September 9th, 2012 at 5:41 pm [Reply]

    Slylock Fox-Today’s solution is wrong. When it comes to doing push ups Reeky Rat is always honest. Slylock is using his negative opinion of Reeky to cloud his judgement.

  155. seismic-2
    September 9th, 2012 at 5:43 pm [Reply]

    SM: Please explain to me again just how this showdown with Spiderman at the circus will help Clown-9 exact his revenge on the director and cast of the Broadway play that fired him. On second thought, don’t even try.

  156. Shrug, Speaker to Spam
    September 9th, 2012 at 5:44 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#147):

    “MT – The unspoken message in today’s Mark Trail: adopting a pet is a gamble! Sure, you might wind up with an Andy, but on the other hand, you might get stuck with a Sassy.”

    I don’t know how to do crossed-out letters here, so please just use your imagination to see the final word, Sassy, carefully crossed out and replaced by the word Rusty.

    // Fixed it for you.

  157. Mr. O'Malley
    September 9th, 2012 at 5:51 pm [Reply]

    MW: Creepier than the invisible ghosts steering sailboats and the red giant sun promising the imminent end of all life on earth is the way Dawn’s disembodied hand still clings to her left arm after her right arm has been amputated.

  158. Red Greenback
    September 9th, 2012 at 6:17 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug, Speaker to Spam (#156): Left arrow (shift comma) then type the word strike then a right arrow (shift period). To close strikeout do the same but add a slash (the one to the right of the period key) after the left arrow.

  159. Uncle Lumpy
    September 9th, 2012 at 6:19 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug, Speaker to Spam (#156):

    <strike>Stricken text.</strike> gives you Stricken text.

    Go nuts.

  160. Red Greenback
    September 9th, 2012 at 6:28 pm [Reply]

    @Uncle Lumpy (#159): How did you do that? I mean how did you type in that stuff without the 1st “Stricken text” not being stricken? Voodoo magic?

  161. tymime
    September 9th, 2012 at 6:28 pm [Reply]

    Maybe it’s punk as in “little punks”.

  162. Poteet
    September 9th, 2012 at 6:30 pm [Reply]

    JP — I did about three minutes of research and that ten-acre pot field could easily be worth $30 million. Of course it was planted by people whose brains were so fried that their site was certain to be discovered, so this seems to be another example of the old adage about not ingesting your own drugs if you want to make a profit.

  163. commodorejohn
    September 9th, 2012 at 6:32 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug, Speaker to Spam (#156): Indeed, sir. Indeed.

  164. Buck Ripsnort
    September 9th, 2012 at 6:36 pm [Reply]

    Slylock: Damn punk kids these days, making bets on everything including push-ups! THAT’S what Weber means by “punk”, Josh.

  165. Uncle Lumpy
    September 9th, 2012 at 6:39 pm [Reply]

    @Red Greenback (#160):

    Hahaha — no magic. I substituted the HTML entity “&lt;” for the “<” to get the unstricken text, then restored the “<” characters for the stricken text. But please don’t ask me how I typed the previous sentence: things are getting hella nested up in here.

  166. Liam
    September 9th, 2012 at 6:54 pm [Reply]

    RMMD-Sorry but the moon for tomorrow night is a fat guy pulling down his pants.

    MW-Doesn’t Dawn go to school outside of Santa Royale where they teach non-Mary Worth ideas and concepts.

    A3G-You also misheard her. Greg is a client and not a friend. Margo keeps her friends and clients separate.

    JP-If Avery told Sam about the pot fields then Sam would want to have a bigger trip.

  167. Red Greenback
    September 9th, 2012 at 7:19 pm [Reply]

    <Thanks, Uncle Lumpy!>

  168. Little Guy
    September 9th, 2012 at 7:21 pm [Reply]

    Luann: Luann learns that her real father is Phil Keoghan.

    PV: Perhaps she can conjure up the alchemist Heisenberg.

  169. Elk Meadow
    September 9th, 2012 at 7:52 pm [Reply]

    @Horace Broon (#17):

    PV: The Red Hood? Has there been any hint that the guy who took over is a werewolf? Because that would be awesome.

    You win The Best Comment, as selected by Yours Truly.

  170. Uncle Lumpy
    September 9th, 2012 at 7:59 pm [Reply]

    @Red Greenback (#167):

    You’re welcome! FYI, there’s no need to use an HTML entity for the “>” — so long as there’s no tag to close, it will parse as a normal character.

  171. The Ridger
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:09 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#139): Apologies! I didn’t copy the original sentence and should have; for some reason I remembered it as reading “deserve to have”, and the “to have” is clearly not there.

  172. The Ridger
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:11 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#139): And to answer your question, No. At least not with a leg to stand on. When choosing whether to use a reflexive pronoun it doesn’t matter if the referent is a Noun Phrase or a pronoun.

  173. Artist formerly known as Ben
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:14 pm [Reply]

    SFx: When we talk about Reeky Rat’s “punk pals”, in what sense do we mean punk? Like loser delinquent punk, because that seems somewhat judgmental since neither we nor Slylock know the guys. There’s also the prison bitch sense of the word, but it seems irresponsible to speculate. And of course you have the punk rock style itself, but the only indicator we have of that is the shock of pink hair on Reeky himself. Punk rock + hillbilly is an intriguing mix, though.

    FW: “That new inflatable tunnel is going to give our football team some real class.” That’s not a sentence anyone has actually said. I think because that level of delusional schizoid thinking gets you disqualified from coaching football. (Obviously, pedophilia is a different story.)

    C-Shaft: So nice that school is in session again and Crankshaft can get back to being a professional douchebag.

    MT: “They provide highly trained assistance to inbred nature writers with a propensity to fisticuffs.”

    Archie: I don’t remember “paint house to match dad’s grape jelly sport shirt” from the chore list when I was a teen.

    PV: “I am Rhoda, now called the Red Hood. I was born in the Bronx, New York in December, 1941. I’ve always felt responsible for World War II.”

    H&L: Consolation kudos to Chip for not saying anything like “What have you breast doing since then?” or “I wish we’d met boner.”

    OBH: Love ya, Ruthie. Never change.

    Marvin: Yeah well, if that’s what it takes to keep you from tailgating.

    DT: Happy birthday, Honey Moon. No, don’t interrupt dear. This year you’re getting a nice sparkling retcon.

    Baldo: Jeez, Hector Hammond’s wandered pretty far from the Green Lantern comics.

  174. Artist formerly known as Ben
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:27 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#49): re Curtis: Sadly sneaking up at night to watch “Taxi Driver” can’t make Curtis any more badass.

  175. tallyHO
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:32 pm [Reply]

    Hi & Lois:

    The redheaded kid, Chip’s friend, is wearing what I suppose can be called a “pillbox” hat. (or, it is a can of tuna?)

    In what cultures/subcultures is it considered cool to wear either a striped, blue pillbox hat or to wear a can of tuna on your head?

    I’m not one to give advice to comic strip characters but I’d say if Young Chip wants to get a girlfriend, he needs to stop hanging around with weirdos who might not be appreciated for their eccentricities (or for their Charlie the Tuna obsessions).

    //and, if there is some religious reason I’m over-looking then that opens up a completely different can of worms. I’m will to open that can, mind you, but, I just can’t see any reason for that headwear, be it Albacorianism or Cannedfishism.

  176. tallyHO
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:34 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#176):

    //…Or believing in Cantheism, for that matter.

  177. Austria
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:35 pm [Reply]

    FW: Three words that should never be used in the same sentence: “inflatable tunnel” and “class.”

    Luann: Oh gosh, this is actually really funny.

    PBS: And this is cute. Did the comics page fall out of another dimension today or something?

    Zits: So THAT’S what Mama Zits’ career is — she’s a high school guidance counselor!!

  178. pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:48 pm [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#134): Oh. <<blink blink>> That’s easy. Better put that knife away…

  179. Anonymous
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:49 pm [Reply]

    Debates on reflexive pronouns, instructions on hypertext striking language, and recordings of saxophone mouthpieces. Where else you gonna find discussion this hot on a Sunday? Huh? I ask you.

  180. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:50 pm [Reply]

    180 was me. (sigh). Friggin iPad.

  181. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:52 pm [Reply]

    By the way, as long as we’re getting technical today, is there an edit feature within the comments after posting?

  182. commodorejohn
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:56 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#182): Nope, it’s preview-and-done. If it were something drastic (like, say, you accidently admitted to loving Adolf Hitler,) you could ask Uncle Lumpy or Josh to fix it, but otherwise you just gotta live with what you posted.

  183. There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:57 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#182): Is there an edit feature within the comments after posting?

    Yes. Isn’t it called “Uncle Lumpy”?

  184. There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm
    September 9th, 2012 at 8:58 pm [Reply]

  185. There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:04 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#174): I think because that level of delusional schizoid thinking gets you disqualified from coaching football.

    Speaking of which, what are the chances Becky’s mom is buried under the 50-yard line?

  186. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:07 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#183): Just my anal side wanting everything to be perfect. Thanks.

  187. pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:16 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#187): Dude, now the NSA has a record of you saying “anal” in their archives…

  188. Nehemiah Scudder
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:23 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#101): @Baka Gaijin (#118): @The Ridger (#171): @The Ridger (#172):
    Thank heavens we’ve settled that one then! I don’t mind telling you I was prepared to go to the mattresses on this, and am so relieved that it isn’t necessary.

    So, I nominate us all for CsOTW, Grammatical & Slide Rule Division.

    // Psst! I’ve got a bunch of herbal viagra, Chinese designer handbags, and athletic shoes to pass out that I swiped when Uncle Lumpy locked me up the other night in his special locker! Pass it on!

  189. Chaze, Himself
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:24 pm [Reply]

    @pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe (#188): Edit! Edit! Can I get an edit, please? Anal reference on aisle two!

  190. Peanut Gallery
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:27 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#105): Way back when FW was occasionally funny (you’ll just have to take my word for that), the name “Scapegoats” struck me as mildly humorous. Now, of course, it’s just another part of the depressing dreck.

  191. Chaze, His Own Self
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:30 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#189): You didn’t happen to find any of that stuff you sprinkle on your food that makes you skinny, did you? If not, herbal Viagra, eh?

  192. seismic-2
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:34 pm [Reply]

    FW: The school athletic program is broke, right? (That’s why they held a raffle to give away the Kilimanjaro trip, as a fundraiser to keep the specialest snowflake’s girls basketball program operating, since that is the only program that matters.) So where did they get the money for an inflatable tunnel for the football team? Maybe they fired Bull, which is why he’s sitting in the stands, and the team is now being coached by an unpaid volunteer, just like in Gil Thorp?

  193. Nehemiah Scudder
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:34 pm [Reply]

    @Exercises To Do at Home (#173): When someone writes an piece of writing he/she retains the image of a user in his/her mind that how a user can understand it.
    Thus that’s why this paragraph is perfect. Thanks!

    Wow! Another grammar enthusiast! With a miracle weight loss program!

  194. Peanut Gallery
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:35 pm [Reply]

    @pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe (#125): I didn’t know Johnnie Walker made a Christian Label Scotch…

  195. Chaze, His Own Self
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:41 pm [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#191): The UC Santa Cruz Banana Slugs. Now there’s a cool team name. And what a mascot!

  196. Nehemiah Scudder
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:43 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze, His Own Self (#192): You didn’t happen to find any of that stuff you sprinkle on your food that makes you skinny, did you?

    Sorry, no. But there are combinations of drugs that are effective. It worked for Anna Nicole Smith.

  197. Red Greenback
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:46 pm [Reply]

    In the absence of weights, I am employing exercises to do at home.

  198. bats :[
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:47 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#193): I’m having a harder time distinguising betwen Dinkle and Funky and Bull. Then again, I really don’t give a rat’s ass about what goes on 99% of the time in the strip or with whom.

  199. Peanut Gallery
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:51 pm [Reply]

    @Exercises To Do at Home (#173):

    When someone writes an piece of writing he/she himself/herself retains the image of a user in his/her hisself’s/herself’s mind that how a user can understand it him/her/itselves.

    Fixed that for you.

    Thus that’s why this paragraph is perfect. Thanks!

    You’re welcome!

  200. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:55 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#196): I suppose. Anything is better than a responsible diet and plenty of exercise. Well, ALMOST anything, right, Anna Nicole?

  201. Chaze, Himself/Itself
    September 9th, 2012 at 9:57 pm [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#199): Perfect coda for an interesting day.

  202. Ukulele Ike
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:00 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#151): The words ran together. It was “Not Hung.”

    Oh. I thought you were referencing Sigmund’s sword-in-the-tree from Die Walkure.

    I mean, knowing you, you could have been.

  203. Sgt. Stoned
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:01 pm [Reply]

    Archie: Archie painted the house lavender and Mr. Andrews never noticed, even though it is the same color as his shirt.

    MW: Well, it didn’t take long for Dawn’s exhiliaration from having narrowly escaped death to dissipate and for her to resume her normal life comportment of moping funk.

  204. Ukulele Ike
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:05 pm [Reply]

    By the way, I love Adolf Hitler.

  205. Ukulele Ike
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:05 pm [Reply]

    DAMN! Can I get an edit, here?

  206. The Edit Nazi
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:13 pm [Reply]

    @Ukulele Ike (#205): Can I get an edit, here?

    No edit for you!

  207. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:14 pm [Reply]

    @Ukulele Ike (#205): Edit! Edit, please! Hitler reference in aisle three!

  208. pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:18 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#207): What is this, the Producers?

  209. Chaze
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:20 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#192): The unpaid coach in Gil Thorp? Steve Boone? Heard he went to work for a wallpaper hanging company, where he’s busier than a ….well, ahem, uh,….you know.

  210. seismic-2
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:20 pm [Reply]

    @Ukulele Ike (#204): Around here, that’s almost as contemptible as saying that you like Phil Hitler.

  211. Godwin
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:23 pm [Reply]

    New thread!

  212. Carmen Ghia
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:26 pm [Reply]

    @pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe (#208): What is this, the Producers?

    “Roger, we’re not alone…”

  213. billman
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:54 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze, His Own Self (#195):

    or the UC Irvine Anteaters.

    Couldn’t find a pic of the B.C. anteater they actually use as a mascot, cause I’m lazy but the explanation is there, including the charming “Zot ‘n’ Go” name they use for campus convenience stores.

  214. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:57 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#174): Actually, I was thinking of how similar it was to a particular Calvin & Hobbes strip.

  215. Artist formerly known as Ben
    September 9th, 2012 at 10:59 pm [Reply]

    @pastordan, no friend of the apostrophe (#74):

    Dilbert: I don’t think Scott Adams should do jokes about irrational, angry women.

    You speak as if he can help himself.

  216. Artist formerly known as Ben
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:19 pm [Reply]

    @There have always been Snarkadders at Curmudgeon Farm (#102):

    MW Well, Mary has all the answers, doesn’t she? If Dawn continues in the misery of her meaningless life she has only herself to blame. Mary gave her the only solution. Ignore Mary’s advice at your own peril, Dawn!

    Meanwhile Wilbur says that he’s also trying to lead a meaningful life. If any evidence of this has been shown, I’ve surely missed it.

  217. Not Brooke
    September 9th, 2012 at 11:29 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#120): An inner editor would be helpful.

  218. CanuckDownSouth
    September 10th, 2012 at 12:00 am [Reply]

    @Austria (#177): re: Zits. It’s actually far sadder – this mother who gets frequently driven to histrionics as she is baffled by teen behaviour and endlessly demonstrates her inability to connect or communicate with her son is a child pschologist

  219. Droopy Says
    September 10th, 2012 at 12:34 am [Reply]

    Spider-Bland: Dumb, dumber, dumbest, spiderman. Grammarians may blanch but this is one time when the English language needs a category beyond the superlative.

    FU, W: After the disgrace of missing his Stuporman deadline, Mopey Pete joins the Foreign Legion. Years later he finds himself combating Corny Winkerbean at the Battle of Boring Boring. Tragically neither of them die.

    Jugs Parker: Is the coffee poisoned or drugged? Will it match the superb quality of the coffee produced on Judge Parker’s Columbian estate? How wil Bea turn down Avery’s next pass? What other unexciting things will almost happen this week?

    Shoe: I always wondered what it would look like if Brookins tried to draw a human being. I’m still wondering.

    Mock Trail: Poachers, if you won’t shoot Rusty now, shoot yourselves. You’ll thank me for this advice when you get to know Rusty worser. (In a technical sense, “better” may be the correct word. But if you use that word to describe any aspect of Rusty, the English language will barf.)

  220. Elk Meadow
    September 10th, 2012 at 12:40 am [Reply]

    @company site (#219):

    Well, yeah, that’s what she’s suppose to be, but when have we ever seen her at the office, visiting with patients, etc.?

    She’s unemployed and unemployable a stay-at-home mom with a teen-age son, so she’s by herself for seven hours a day, while her husband is at work. She doesn’t have any outside interests, like most SAHMs do, of PTSA, or planning the senior party or free-lance writing, church or community activities, or even meeting with her college alumni society or visiting casinos or strip joints. She just stays home, dwelling on what he is or is not doing. No wonder she’s a shrieking harpy.

    Luann’s mom is also a SAHM who also has no outside interests other than whatever Brad and Toni are doing, but I think she’s found something that may or may not be legal to keep her sitting on the couch all the time without gaining an ounce.

  221. Chip Whittle
    September 10th, 2012 at 12:46 am [Reply]

    9 Chickweed Lane: I have accepted much from this comic strip. I have accepted fashion industry leaders wanting to humiliate the model who makes their outfits look too good. I have accepted a grown woman flying to Vienna on a day’s notice to discuss her pregnancy before she even takes a home pregnancy test and leaving Vienna before she thinks to mention it to the people she intended to talk to. I have accepted her granny boinking the world’s most incompetent Nazi officer to gather no intelligence which gets passed on to a guy who spends ten years secretly preparing himself for D-Day so when he lands in 1954 he takes Germany completely by surprise and invades Omaha, Nebraska, instead. I have accepted Amos and Edda being spotted making out by a tourist in a hot-air balloon whose camera happens to be hooked up to the biggest Belgian television station and immediately broadcast live around the world so Seth and Seth-Lover can patch up their intimacy issues. But I will not accept that a person, having spoken with Thorax, will then consciously and deliberately ask Thorax to speak some more. There are certain things which simply can never happen.

  222. Holly Folly
    September 10th, 2012 at 12:48 am [Reply]

    Slylock never sleeps does he?

  223. Baka Gaijin
    September 10th, 2012 at 1:02 am [Reply]

    Tell me Clown-9 greased the pole about 30 feet off the ground. That’d be excellent. Spidey climbing, climbing. Spidey slipping, slipping. That’s Monday’s Spiderman if you’re wondering.

  224. bats :[
    September 10th, 2012 at 1:26 am [Reply]

  225. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    September 10th, 2012 at 1:39 am [Reply]

    Pibgorn: What, no smartypants commentary on her dress being different? I is disappoint.

  226. Droopy Says
    September 10th, 2012 at 2:43 am [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#223): Can the grease be toxic, corrosive and highly inflammable? Please?

  227. This Guy
    September 10th, 2012 at 2:46 am [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#225): Look, I really hate to be, er, pedantic, but the correct phrasing is “I am disappoint.”

  228. Jason1981
    September 10th, 2012 at 2:47 am [Reply]

    Curtis: So, anyone think the mom is going to yell at the little asshole (aka “Barry”) for teasing Curtis? ….Yeah, I don’t either.

    S-M: Spidey’s climbing Clown-9′s pole, and being threatening with going down (and being “polished off” yesterday). This….this isn’t a family comic strip, right?

  229. John C Fremont
    September 10th, 2012 at 5:21 am [Reply]

    @billman (#213): @bats :[ (#224):
    “Oh, here she comes.
    Watch out, boy, she’ll chew you up.
    Oh, here she comes.
    She’s an anteater…”

    MT – Mark Trail in Pronoun Trouble!
    Tan-Haired Guy; “Shoot him now! Shoot him now!”
    Rusty; “You keep out of this. He doesn’t have to shoot you now.”
    (Psst. Dark-Haired Fudd Guy. This time, wait ’til you get home.)

  230. gleeb
    September 10th, 2012 at 6:52 am [Reply]

    Slylock: Clearly the bull was trying to collect parts for the body he’s building to house the brain of his dead mother.

    ‘bean: Mopey Pete, you decide to follow? Corey decides to join the Army, a move to which his uncle/cousin/whatever Wally will be actually interesting to see (although my money is on Batiuk blowing it), and we get more Mopey Pete, the Fran Lebowitz of comic books?

    Rex: All this emphasis on how it’s just two days only emphasises how slowly time moves for the Morgans.

  231. Little Guy
    September 10th, 2012 at 7:28 am [Reply]

    Curtis: Run now. Go live with the Burbers. They’ll treat you better.

    9CL: I haven’t seen defeat snatched from the jaws of victory like that since Moises Alou had a meltdown/tantrum at Wrigley.

  232. Dartpaw86
    September 10th, 2012 at 8:11 am [Reply]

    Reeky is guilty for cannibalism since he’s eating sausages though pigs are sentient equals in that world. Unless it’s one of those confusing worlds where anthropomorphic animals and normal animals co-exist. And seeing the crabs I believe that’s what this is. I do tend to see normal rats in the background. That’s it… Slylock Fox is canon with pluggers. (Count weirdly mutated all the people into have human/half animals)

  233. Charly
    September 11th, 2012 at 3:35 am [Reply]

    @221 for COTY

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