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Soapy Wednesday

Apartment 3-G, 10/24/12

Haha, Greg, good job throwing off Margo’s suspicions there. The correct answer to “Why would you BUY A NEW YORK APARTMENT when you’re SHOOTING A MOVIE IN LONDON” is something like “Gee, maybe because I live in New York and most movies only shoot over a few weeks or months?” rather than “WHAAAH MY OWN PUBLICIST DOESN’T BELIEVE ME WHAAAH IT’S LIKE SHE THINKS I’M STALKING HER OR MAYBE HER ROOMMATES OR SOMETHING WAAAAH.” Also, you know, maybe a good publicist would think “Hmm, my client has just plopped down some cash for an apartment in a glamorous building in Manhattan, maybe this could be seeded on Page Six” rather than “WHY ARE YOU HERE AND NOT THERE???”

By the way, I’m actually a little surprised that Margo isn’t on her building’s co-op board, considering her well-known love of being in charge of things and deciding who lives and who dies. The building’s conversion to a co-op apparently happened just a bit before I started writing this blog, and I’m forever saddened to have missed out on what I’m sure were a dramatic series of legal filings.

Mary Worth, 10/24/12

Oooh, Dawn’s relationship with Jim really is on an express train to crazytown! The lesson Dawn is apparently going to learn here is that the depressed and the disabled are dangerous, so you should shun them. Also, maybe the Mary Worth team has wildly misunderstood what “hydrophobia” means and soon Jim will become rabies-crazed? Can’t wait!

Judge Parker, 10/24/12

“So look, I’ll pay off whatever small amount of money Bea owes you, but in return you’ll have to shut down the vast, lucrative criminal enterprise that allows you to purchase Picassos and live comfortably in your underground lair. Do we have a deal, my violent, chainsaw-wielding, felonious friend?”

246 responses to “Soapy Wednesday”

  1. Rocky Stoneaxe
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:30 am [Reply]

    Watch Your Head

    The Family Circus Movie… coming soon to a vomitorium near you:

    http://www.gocomics.com/watchyourhead/2012/10/24

  2. Ringo Beaumont III
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:34 am [Reply]

    MW: How do you pronounce “!,” anyway? I’m guessing “Potrzebie.”

  3. Liam
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:34 am [Reply]

    JP-I have a better drug than pot that you can sell. It is rather popular with all my Hollywood friends. It’s called cocaine.

    A3G-Margo isn’t your publicist anymore. She quit that job and this week she is a nuclear physicist.

  4. Little Blue Bicycle
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:36 am [Reply]

    MW: Jim’s one arm has the strength of three, not to mention a heightened sense of hearing.

  5. Chareth Cutestory
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:37 am [Reply]

    Mary Worth: The perfect imaginary panel three would involve Jim ripping Dawn’s arm off and announcing, “Now we can be together forever!”

    Judge Parker: Is that a nipple on that Picasso? It is art and I am confused. But I genuinely hope it is a nipple, because then this comic would be showing us a perfect trifecta of deadly weapons, boobs, and alcohol.

  6. Nekrotzar
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:37 am [Reply]

    Jim wants to take Dawn’s left arm and use it to replace his own missing one. And when that goes badly, he’ll give himself a dumb nickname like “Mr. ‘Armful” and taunt Spider-Man.

  7. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:41 am [Reply]

    Luann – TJ has spent months working full-time at a minimum wage job and secretly taping his boss, all as part of a revenge scam to get her fired. And, yet, he still has a less pathetic existence than Brad- who spends his days making “vroom vroom!” noises while playing with toys – or Toni – who spends her days finding new excuses to keep Brad from stealing second base.

  8. Felix Margay
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:41 am [Reply]

    BB: The thousand injuries of Gen. Halftrack Ms. Buxley had borne as she best could, but when he ventured upon insult she vowed revenge …

    MT: Say, isn’t that Señorita Momjeans, or do they all look like Señorita Momjeans south of Miami?

  9. Mary Worthless
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:49 am [Reply]

    “Mary, I am worried about Jim. He seemed nice enough at first, but now is acting irrationally. I need some advice on how to handle this situation.”

    “Dawn, I am glad you came to me. You need to ask yourself, what is the sound of one hand? When you can answer that and snatch this rock from my hand, you can move on. “

  10. wossname
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:57 am [Reply]

    Curtis – Gunther, I hope you didn’t pay lobster prices for those meals, because that’s not lobster — it’s salmon ovals from the Charterstone Junior League cookbook.

    GT – Apparently the newspaper office is on a rooftop overlooking downtown Milford.

    MW – Whoa, Jim’s physical therapy is really paying off. The iron grip of his remaining hand is so powerful that Dawn is emitting ouch lines.

    Phantom – Of course they know where the lioness goes – she’s a robotic lion and they’re holding the remote control.

    @Arabella (#Y130): Thank you for the clear explanation of FW genealogy!

  11. Alter Ego
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:57 am [Reply]

    love is… black-market adoptions.

  12. lynn
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:59 am [Reply]

    Phantom: has broken a long streak of good artwork with the current story arc. We have a lioness who looks like a lucha libre wrestler in a cat mask, and now an out-of-scale zebra. Pfui.

  13. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:00 am [Reply]

    Dilbert: *takes notes*

    SBp: *golf clap*

    Zits: the meddlegasm, it’s spreading.

    Crank: well, that answers that.

    MG&G: pee-mail jokes, amirite?

    OBH: ewwwwwwwwwwwww.

    RwO: *gigglez*

    SF: mmmmmm, B-world Peppermint Patty & Marcie.

  14. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:00 am [Reply]

    Love Is . . .I got nothin’.

  15. lynn
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:00 am [Reply]

    Dilbert: God, I love Alice. She’s my role model.

  16. Perky Bird
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:01 am [Reply]

    So Jim is now convinced Dawn will drown, like his sister, if she goes near water? I eagerly await the moment when Jim’s paranoia finally causes him to throw himself between Dawn and a water fountain, screaming, “NOOOOOOOOOO!”

  17. Marc
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:12 am [Reply]

    A3G- Margo, Margo, Margo; Greg is shooting a movie but you seem to have misheard. The movie is not being shot IN London, it’s being shot AT The London. The London is a midtown Manahattan Luxury Hotel, only a few blocks from the apartment building. Hence the convinence of buying Apartment 3J. Well that and he wants to plow you whenever he isn’t over at the London shooting Ghostbusters 3- Slimer’s Revenge.

    Mark Trail- How nice of the kidnappers to let Mark bring all of his fishing gear. Looks like he will still be able to do some pleasure bonefishing while stuck on the whitest Caribbean Island ever.

    Mary Worth- Jim’s deathgrip has popped Dawn’s hand right off her wrist causing Dawn to loudly proclaim an exclamation point.

    Funky- If they don’t drive into the middle of a gang war soon, this is going to be one gigantic fucking waste of time.

    Luann- Ahhh of course, TJ is recording Ann to get her fired for poorly executing the thing that TJ has been doing since he took the job. TJ is good at screwing customers so he’s a good guy and Ann is bad at it, hence her evilness. Meanwhile Ox reverts back to his inability to talk like a coherent human being.

    Cranky- Power of attorney doesn’t mean that you can empty your mother’s bank account into yours while she is still of sound mind.

  18. Pozzo
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:17 am [Reply]

    There are many fields in which the phrase “It was all Aristotle’s idea” would apply. Condo selection doesn’t strike me as one of them.

  19. Maltmasher
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:22 am [Reply]

    JP- and with that last line, the comics finally gets to see it’s first full on human execution in living color.

  20. seismic-2
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:22 am [Reply]

    JP: Avery, you can take off your Hollywood-issue shades now. You’re in a mineshaft, for God’s sake.

  21. Poteet
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:33 am [Reply]

    A3G — I’m going to try to quit complaining that A3G people change heads from panel to panel and just accept it as a gift that allows me to pick my favorites. In today’s strip I prefer Panel One Margo and Panel Two Greg.

  22. Esther Blodgett
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:34 am [Reply]

    Love is… childless creepers.

    JP: Why yes, that sounds fair. Said no large-scale pot farmer wielding a chainsaw, ever.

    BBlues: Please. When Precocious Daughter was a wee thing, binkies outnumbered diapers at our house. In fact, I would have let her run around bare-assed before I let her go without a binky at the ready. That’s the kind of terrible mother I am.

    MW: Jim is angry that Dawn seems to be mocking his disability by flaunting her freakishly enormous hand.

  23. Poteet
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:36 am [Reply]

    @Pozzo (#18): If I had a float, that would ride.

  24. LP2004
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:36 am [Reply]

    JP: Booze and a chainsaw. That’s a combination with a long history of leading to those famous Guy’s Last Words: “Hey, watch this!”

  25. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:42 am [Reply]

    Oop – The coloring effect in panel 2 is good enough we can overlook the missing hand props in panel 1.

    Skippy – By the time this strip was printed, they’d already been doing golf jokes in the comics for decades. SAD BUT TRUE.

    Archie – Schrödinger’s Jughead blinks in and out today. He’s amused when he comes back, so maybe he — along with the class — went somewhere funny in the second panel.

  26. Poteet
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:43 am [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#7): Or Luann, who broods about what Quill might want to say to her someday. Or Gunther, who is, well, Gunther.

  27. Poteet
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:46 am [Reply]

    9CL — Brooke, I never thought I’d say this, but please return to your usual theme of sex-related sniggering.

  28. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:46 am [Reply]

    AD – They’re smirking at Clumsy because of the coloring error. On the next hole, they’re going to pretend they thought his nose was a golf ball.

    Curtis – Gunther looks like he’s trying to imagine her doing that around his knob and wondering if he’d like it or not.

    Fred – Now there’s a happy balloon. “I know I’ll reach a point where the air pressure just makes me pop, and my lifeless carcass will drift back down and probably choke a sea creature… but I’m FREE! FREE of that wretched strip where nothing ever happens! FREEEEEE!!”

  29. Greg
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:46 am [Reply]

    A3G: Margo: “Why buy a place here when you can milk the cow for free?” *cue sexy bass guitar* *Greg flees in panic*

  30. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:47 am [Reply]

    Hägar – “Our only chance is to attack Dawn and fight to the finish! We’ll deprive her of Jim’s help by attacking on the pier!”

    love is… …deciding on a baby.

    Mark – “Now give me your cell phone…”
    “What’s a sell foan?”
    (The important thing here is that Mark talks like Dudley Do-Right.)

  31. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:48 am [Reply]

    Popeye – Holy cow! He’s NOT two feet tall! I… I was wrong. About a decades-old reprint, no less.

    Spider-Man – Now I have the strangest craving for a can of Green Giant string beans.

  32. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:49 am [Reply]

    Hallowin.

    flying foxes, sorry bats :[, it’s not what you think.

    sand kittehs.

    David Bowie corgi.

  33. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:49 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#31): “Ho Ho Ho!”

  34. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:49 am [Reply]

    @Droopy Says (#y183): Don’t forget to saw off Bubba’s left arm! Rex Morgan can sew it onto Jim!

    @Perky Bird (#16): Ah, if only. Your comment made it real, for a moment.

    @Greg (#29): Your comment puts me in mind of this Benny Bell classic.

  35. Horace Broon
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:51 am [Reply]

    DT: This is what Dick Tracy’s world is like: Honey Moon thinks she was told her mother was murdered by a lunatic with a car bomb to spare her from the horrible truth.

    H&L: Hang on, it’s Wednesday! On Wednesday we get Trixie talking gibberish about sunbeams, not the twins in Cash for Answers scandal!

    S4th: Actually, Marcie was quite capable of bossing Pepermint Patty around when she wanted to. A running gag was Marcie saying something Patty didn’t want to agree with and didn’t have an answer to, to which Patty would reply “Don’t call me sir!” Leading to the epic series of strips where Marcie calls Peppermint Patty out on her treatment of “Chuck”, concluding “Incidentally, have you noticed I’ve stopped calling you sir?”

    (I’ve heard it said by people with more interesting lives than me “the sub is the one with the power”. Personally, I wouldn’t want to get told what to do by a sandwich, but whatever.)

    Um, where was I going with this? Oh, yeah; Hil and Becca don’t strike me as Bizarro Peppermint Patty and Marcie, just as Peppermint Patty and Marcie.

  36. S. Stout
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:53 am [Reply]

    Luann: Unless T.J. got Ann on tape trying to charge extra for food, I don’t believe she’s ever done anything illegal. Well, except for agreeing with T.J.’s evil plan to upsell customers. I’m sure Evans will conveniently ignore the months worth of audio where T.J. screws over every customer that comes into WW, but oh yeah, he’s the designated good character so it’s all good.

    Note that T.J. spent almost a year of his life doing this just to get a woman fired that tried to make Brad do his job instead of eat with customers, and you’ll only scratch the surface on how weird and pathetic all this is.

  37. Dood
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:59 am [Reply]

    Why did those earlier Apartment 3-G’s have so much co-op building action below the chestline?

  38. Mibbitmaker
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:01 am [Reply]

    @Ringo Beaumont III (#2): I don’t know about Josh, but this is definately MY Comment of the Week!

  39. Artist formerly known as Ben
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:02 am [Reply]

    A3G: Margo hasn’t said anything about not believing him, but I guess Greg’s “who are you calling a liar?” reflexes are pretty developed.

    MW: Look, guys, I don’t want to be rude, but I’m starting to suspect Jim may have some issues.

    JP: I’m starting to suspect that some big league LA pot dealer sent Avery out here for the express purpose of bribing a stubborn competitor out of business. I also suspect, of course, that we’ll never have that juicy tidbit confirmed in the strip.

    Ziggy: “Lasagna? What, do I look like I’m made of money?”

    Archie: Of all the questions to ask about one of American history’s most fascinating characters, Mr. Flutesnoot asks about his relations to a shifty and mostly-pejorative term that wasn’t used in his lifetime. He’s lucky that Archie meets idiocy with idiocy instead of throwing rotten fruit.

    Popeye: A salient question, even if cowboy daddy has something of a Ringling Brothers look himself.

    GA: This looks familiar. “Mom” is a dressed-up skeleton in a rocking chair, isn’t she?

    GT: Yeah, Ms Ducey’s next report is going to be how Terry Gallagher is now Milford’s most popular gay crush.

    Blondie: Wouldn’t a breaded catcher’s mitt be a leather glove coated with breadcrumbs? It looks like Dagwood’s teeth and constitution are in for a test.

    FC: Thel’s arms look brawnier than usual. Bathing her children must make her Hulk out.

    Luann: So after months of vigilante surveillance still hasn’t given TJ enough evidence to come forward to whoever? Oh, but don’t worry, the moral judgment of a gentle giant will put him over the top.

    SFx: True or false: 25 cents a pop is worth the severe risk of being mangled by a bull’s horns.

    Lockhorns: Join Leroy as he picks up huffing supplies for the weekend.

  40. Dood
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:03 am [Reply]

    Judge Parker: If this means Sam has to return to the suitcase-of-cash repository, then negotiate on, my Hollywood friend.

  41. Artist formerly known as Ben
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:05 am [Reply]

    @S. Stout (#36):

    Note that T.J. spent almost a year of his life doing this just to get a woman fired that tried to make Brad do his job instead of eat with customers, and you’ll only scratch the surface on how weird and pathetic all this is.

    And the more you scratch the worse it itches.

  42. Cloudbuster
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:09 am [Reply]

    ASM: “I forgot what casino Kraven’s appearing in.” Peter, you had, literally, one thing you came to Las Vegas to do, and you apparently did absolutely zero preparation for it. Because “which casino” is approximately “Step 0.” Rest assured, your position as the laziest, lamest superhero on the funny pages is still secure.

  43. terrapin
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:17 am [Reply]

    JP: Avery is a negotiator and is only doing what negotiators do…starting with something big he knows Bubba will never agree to and eventually working his way to what he really wants. A couple doobies and one of those cool skull bongs.

  44. Oregonian
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:17 am [Reply]

    Just a few weeks ago, in the course of preparing a witty comment about the Gil Thorp bonfire, I had occasion to study the Wikipedia page about Guy Fawkes. Naturally, that led me directly on to the page explaining exactly what it means for a person to be hanged, drawn, and quartered. (It even has illustrations!) All of which is to say that I already know way too damn much about just what Bubba will do with that chainsaw if he gives even two seconds of thought to Avery’s dumbass proposal.

  45. Illustrator Steve
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:20 am [Reply]

    @Felix Margay (#8): “Say, isn’t that Senorita Momjeans, or do they all look like Senorita Momjeans south of Miami?”

    MT – That’s Senorita Momjeans alright. Just LOOK at the way Mark is gaulking at her! By the look Senorita Momjeans is giving Mark it appears she’s about ready to throw in the towel. Even though the towel she’s folding is still perfectly fine if used today since it’s clearly dated 10-24 right there on the bottom of the dang thing. They may be a poor people living in a poor little village but at least they have fresh towels and clean laundry!

  46. Mibbitmaker
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:21 am [Reply]

    A3G: I don’t care for the new actress playing Margo in the 2nd panel. Plus, the change in actors ruins all this great continuity!

    JP: I think Avery’s just hit non-negotiable. Prepare to get even shorter, Hollywood!

    JP: …Prepare to lose some weight, Hollywood! (in the vital organs area, that is)

    MW: Dawn: “Gee, if I didn’t know better, I’d swear there’s a slim chance this relationship isn’t the best ever. I can’t quite put my finger on it….”

    JP: Avery: “Huh… How come your face is going a deeper shade of purple there, Bubba…?”

    MW: “Looks like it’s intervention time again!”, said Mary Worth…

  47. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:21 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#25): Archie – Schrödinger’s Jughead blinks in and out today. He’s amused when he comes back, so maybe he — along with the class — went somewhere funny in the second panel.

    Interesting. But I’m willing to accept that in the second panel the “camera focus” was shortened so that only the teacher and Archie are visible. In the third panel, the focus returns to what it was in panel one, but…. where is the guy in the green shirt?!

  48. Artist formerly known as Ben
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:24 am [Reply]

    @Felix Margay (#8):

    BB: The thousand injuries of Gen. Halftrack Ms. Buxley had borne as she best could, but when he ventured upon insult she vowed revenge …

    Ooh, nice one!

  49. Illustrator Steve
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:32 am [Reply]

    MT – Senorita Momjeans is not only still alive, she’s doing very well financially as witnessed by her additional new pair of designer momjeans she has hanging out to dry. It appears that Senorita Momjeans is not sharing her new found wealth with her fellow villagers in their quiet little village. Before Senor Ruler catches on to Senorita Momjeans selfish behavior Mark must act quickly by taking her and her daughter by boat to the Miami airport!

  50. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:35 am [Reply]

    @Illustrator Steve (#45): They may be a poor people living in a poor little village but at least they have fresh towels and clean laundry!

    This must be that famous island where the people make a precarious living doing each other’s laundry.

    // BTW, Vercingetorix was the Gaul-King.

  51. Dartpaw86
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:35 am [Reply]

    Garfield: Jon has new shoes, that’s the joke. Live with it.
    http://www.garfield.com/comics/todayscomic.html

  52. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:37 am [Reply]

    Bizarro: But Coach, the sumo team swears by ‘em!

  53. Dartpaw86
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:39 am [Reply]

    Dilbert: Um… Alice, his ear is not on the back of his head.
    http://www.dilbert.com/strips/comic/2012-10-24/

  54. DAS
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:50 am [Reply]

    JP: OK. Now I see where this is going. I.e. now I see how this little adventure is going to end up making Sam Driver even richer than he already is. Bubba and Avery will reach an agreement ending the pot cultivation, Avery will produce a movie, starring Bubba, about large scale pot farming, and Sam Driver will handle all the legalities and paperwork … and earn a big fat commission (billable hours at $500/hour, at least, plus a percentage of the gross from the film) for doing it all.

  55. Mibbitmaker
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:58 am [Reply]

    MW: Dawn: “This guy’s dangerously twisted, what he’s doing to me now! I only wish there was some kind of warning sign… ”

    Curtis: People complained that there were almost no African-Americans in Seinfeld. Well, this strip is now officially the black Seinfeld.

    Luann: Hey, toothy, given the constitutionally shaky use of secret recording you’re engaged in, Nixon suggests you should burn the tapes!

    MT: “…or, rather, you will need it. I just don’t want you to use it, obviously. (aside) Honestly, who writes this crap?!”

  56. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:02 am [Reply]

    @Dartpaw86 (#53): Yea, she should pull it off (slowly) and try again with better aim.

  57. Uncle Lumpy
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:05 am [Reply]

    Mark Trail — Ahem. It’s Señora (or Th’ Widder) Momjeans.

  58. Dood
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:07 am [Reply]

    Rex Morgan, M.D.: Is Rex ever going to get to enjoy eating clams?

  59. LP2004
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:08 am [Reply]

    @DAS (#54): “…and Sam Driver will have Gloria handle all the legalities and paperwork…”

    FTFY

  60. Dood
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:09 am [Reply]

    Mark Trail: I think Mark and Bill have stumbled upon the pilot for a new reality series, “Plugger Island.”

  61. Gabacho
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:19 am [Reply]

    Mary Worth – Finally, a man who gets Dawn! Jim is not like those water loving wimps Dave and her dad Wilbur. Why Wilbur deliberately took her on the water where she was slightly inconvenienced?! And Dave, don’t ask, what with his constant drinking water and his walking by the sea.

    Jim’s a man who cares and will protect Dawn. No wonder she has multiple orgasm lines in panel 2.

  62. Sparkle Plenty
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:20 am [Reply]

    MT: Not only clean towels, but clothespins.

    (Every arc is stooopider than the previous one. How is that even possible?)

  63. Anonymous
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:31 am [Reply]

    Curtis: We get it, Billingsly. When his date laughs, Reeky Rat appears out of nowhere to steal Gunther’s hair.

  64. Little Guy
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:32 am [Reply]

    Now with attribution!

    @Anonymous (#63): Curtis: We get it, Billingsly. When his date laughs, Reeky Rat appears out of nowhere to steal Gunther’s hair.

  65. bombcar
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:41 am [Reply]

  66. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:43 am [Reply]

    @DAS (#54): Not to mention that the movie will contain a plug for the winery that will add 4% a year to Sam’s bottom line.

  67. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:48 am [Reply]

    @Dood (#37):

    I think there might be an Apartment 4G strip running somewhere where you only see the characters from the waist down. I’ve heard it is infinitely more entertaining.

  68. LP2004
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:49 am [Reply]

    @Sparkle Plenty (#62): It’s a mystery, all right. Each Mark Trail storyline seems to reach the platonic ideal of sheer stupidity, and then the next one surpasses it.

    I’ve wondered if that might be why Dick Locher retired from writing Dick Tracy. I think Elrod showed him the outline to the Golden Bible-Verse Bird Band story, and his world collapsed. Realizing that Elrod had achieved a level of total insanity far beyond his capabilities, he just gave up in despair.

  69. SF_Reader
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:52 am [Reply]

    Pluggers – If your idea of discipline is beating your kids into a coma and then getting furious when the damn government social workers show up, then you’re probably a plugger.

  70. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:56 am [Reply]

    MT – Excuse me, did Zapata Man ask Mark Trail for his cell phone? HAHAHAHA! Mark still uses a hand crank model, where Zelda the operator connects his calls to the outside world.

    DtM – Is that a wrist tattoo Mr Wilson is sporting? Is he about to come out as a bear? And the proximity of the closet….hmmmm….or am I overthinking this?

  71. Calico
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:05 pm [Reply]

    “I can’t let you go to that Def Leppard concert either! It’s too dangerous!”

  72. seismic-2
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:07 pm [Reply]

    RMMD: “Well, so long as we’re on Edna’s clock, why don’t we have the ambulance stop off at the restaurant up there so that we can get some clams to eat on our way to the ER?”

    MW: [sigh] Dave used to be an abusive psycho control freak.

  73. Calico
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:09 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#20):
    So THAT’s why Bubba is Purple! He’s lacking enough vitamin D.

  74. kingklash
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:12 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#67): I’d read that.

  75. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:15 pm [Reply]

    ASM – I just came back from Vegas. Pester ain’t there. I think that bus dropped him off in Reno.

  76. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:15 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#75): PETER

  77. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:21 pm [Reply]

    @Felix Margay (#8): Is that a Cask of Amantillado reference?

  78. greghousesgf
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:27 pm [Reply]

    Archie: Not only is Flutesnoot’s question inane even by the standards of this strip, why is he teaching a history class when he’s a science teacher?

  79. HA
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:28 pm [Reply]

    Comics curmugeon ROCKS! oh yeah! Rock and roll baby! Yow! Curmugeon rocks cause comics rock! Weeeeeeeeehoooooo! Garfield ROCKS! Ziggy ROCKS! Snoopy totaly ROCKS! The Better Half ROCKS! Gonna read some comics and ROCK! Yeah! You know why rock and roll is cool? CAUSE IT ROCKSS! Beettle Bailey ROCKS the house! Oh yeah! Weeeeeehooooooooo! Yeah rock!

  80. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:28 pm [Reply]

    Luann: Terrible, evil Ann Eiffel is cheating customers – one customer, exactly – the one who more or less threatened to pummel her a few months ago, and who is lucky to be allowed back in to the restaurant. Yeah, the face of pure evil, you’re lookin’ at it there.

  81. Snarkotix Addict
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:30 pm [Reply]

    Luann – Very clever, TJ! Hey, why don’t you show Ox the hidden cameras you have under Ann’s desk and in her bathroom?

    FC – “How can my neck be dirty? I never do anything with it!”
    There’s a saying, “Use it or lose it.” Which, in this case, explains a lot about the little no-necks in the Keane Kompound.

  82. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:30 pm [Reply]

    @greghousesgf (#78): I took a class in political science.

    That would explain why there are so many freaks of nature in congress. Seriously, NOBODY’s hair is that perfect by natural means.

  83. Manifesta
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:33 pm [Reply]

    Judge Parker: Oh, look, the artist managed to work a different kind of boob into today’s strip.

  84. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:36 pm [Reply]

    Spidey: “He isn’t a hard guy to find!”

    Judging by the enormous bulge in Kraven’s tights, I’d say Parker is wrong yet again.

  85. Hank
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:37 pm [Reply]

    @Marc (#17): Cranky- Power of attorney doesn’t mean that you can empty your mother’s bank account into yours while she is still of sound mind.

    Actually, in many states, it does.

  86. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:41 pm [Reply]

    JP: Is this the first that we’re seeing of Avery’s eyes? Does he think that he can hypnotize with just a glance? “You will give me the camera… You will forgive the debt… You will pack up your pot farm and go away… You… aren’t buying this for a second, are you?”

  87. Marc
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:41 pm [Reply]

    @HA (#79): Well that’s something you don’t see every day.

  88. Liam
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:43 pm [Reply]

    MW-Jim, have you ever considered taking up kite flying. I hear that cures all ails and addictions.

  89. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:47 pm [Reply]

    MW: Compliments to the artist. I think the “WTF!” look simply nails it. Much better than a “gosh!” or a head bobble.

  90. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:47 pm [Reply]

    @Mibbitmaker (#55): Luann: Hey, toothy, given the constitutionally shaky use of secret recording you’re engaged in, Nixon suggests you should burn the tapes!

    Constitutionality is only involved if the government is recording you. One private citizen recording another is not a constitutional issue. In some states, under some circumstances, Ann might be able to mount a civil lawsuit against Toothy, but only if she could prove she had a reasonable expectation of privacy. I think he’s ok if he recorded her in the restaurant while talking to him or the customers. Theres a good discussion of the issue here.

    // Bottom line: don’t take legal advice from Nixon. Not only was he disbarred in 1976, he, like Generalisimo Franco, is still dead, and dead people are notoriously unreliable.

  91. Liam
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

    Luann-When Ann cheats customers she is bad. When TJ cheats customers he is good.

  92. LP2004
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

    @Marc (#87): I’m guessing HA has been taking advantage of Bubba’s absence from the marijuana fields.

  93. Mr. Mxyzptlk
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:49 pm [Reply]

    Luann: So while T.J. chats with Ox, Ann has to handle the counter. She has to take it, ’cause she knows from that constant, demented smile of his, if she ever fired him he’d come back and shoot her.

  94. Liam
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:50 pm [Reply]

    Luann-”Ox, how would you like a hot dog. I’ll also throw in a cookie all for three dollars.”

  95. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:51 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#90): Nixon in ’12 — He’s Tanned, Rested, and Ready!

  96. Liam
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:51 pm [Reply]

    MW-It sounds like Jim needs a good vacation followed by a cruise.

  97. Felix Margay
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:52 pm [Reply]

  98. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:56 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#67): I think there might be an Apartment 4G strip running somewhere where you only see the characters from the waist down.

    I think that’s Apartment PG13. You probably won’t find Apartment NC17 in your local daily, but maybe your alt-weekly would carry it.

  99. Perky Bird
    October 24th, 2012 at 12:57 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#67): That would be the strip called “Apartment 3F.” You know, the one directly downstairs.

  100. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

    A3G: I’m not quite sure I’m following the dialogue. Does Greg think that Margo doesn’t believe that he’s shooting the film or that Margo doesn’t believe that he bought the building?

    I also think it is a legitimate question to politely ask why he is spending so much time in NYC when his job is supposedly in London. He should keep his publicist in the loop, at least to provide a ready answer like “family issues” or something.

  101. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

    Luann – My rant from yesterday was based on the idea that Evans has suddenly remembered that “TJ is denied his deserved promotion due to Ann being pure evil” was not the original plot, and that TJ was supposed to only be working there in order to somehow get revenge for Brad. Today’s strip adds support to that theory as we ret-con in the idea that he has been taping Ann all along. Why has this never been mentioned before? Wouldn’t it have been an important plot point?

    The author is writing himself out of a corner he just now realized he was trapped in.

  102. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

    @Perky Bird (#99): I thought the one directly downstairs would be 2G.

  103. Mysterious shirtless lawyer
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

    Mary Worth: “Dawn, I don’t really know how to put this, but . . . I’m taking your arm!”

  104. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:11 pm [Reply]

    Phantom: I love Phantom, but this week he’s tailing this Jeep through the savannah while riding 50 feet behind on his white stallion. He is 5 orders of magnitude cooler than Spidey, and can out-punch Mr. Trail. But for spy work? Phantom, you suck.

  105. Scrumpy7
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:12 pm [Reply]

    @Ringo Beaumont III (#2):

    Thanks to this comment, I just spent 30 minutes of my life reading up on “Potzrebie,” the potzrebie system of measurement (which Google will automatically calculate for you), and computer scientist Donald Knuth. That was a heck of a rabbit hole to go down from Mary Worth.

  106. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:15 pm [Reply]

    @Perky Bird (#99): Beat you by a minute there, but I like yours better.

  107. S. Stout
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:16 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#101):

    There’s no way for Evans to write himself out of this; T.J. has now worked there for months and months, which shows how insane he really is. Next, Toni will be fired from her job and T.J. will hide in the chief’s closet for 4 years hoping to catch an illegal bribe.

  108. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:16 pm [Reply]

    Dawn: Ok ok! I won’t go to the pier. I’m going home to take a bubble bath.

    Jim: NO! It’s too dangerous! I won’t let you!

    Dawn: I’m going to have a glass of water.

    Jim: NO!

    Dawn: Our bodies are mostly water.

    Jim: Error! Does not compute! ERROR ERROR!

  109. Comcis Fan
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:16 pm [Reply]

    There’s a sweet, unintentionally funny comment under FW on the Seattle comics site from someone who found his or her favorite strips – MW and MT – online, and notes that “people are saying mean things about them too!!” The kicker line is, “Why don’t you people get a life?” If only they saw this site!

  110. Artist formerly known as Ben
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

    @HA (#79): Keep taking your Ritalin, Garth.

  111. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:18 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#102): And that’s even better.

  112. Hibbleton
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#90):
    I don’t think it’s that clear. You always have the right to record yourself but if the intent is to record the other party without notice, in some (all?) states this is illegal or at least inadmissible.

  113. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:24 pm [Reply]

    @S. Stout (#107):

    If I recall my Luann plots correctly (unlike, say, wedding anniversaries), TJ will find very little in the Fire Chief’s closet, as the Chief came out of it years ago.

  114. Will
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:25 pm [Reply]

    PBS: Go get him, Rat.

  115. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:25 pm [Reply]

    MT:
    Ruler: Give me your cell phone, Mr. Trail.

    Trail: Oh, you must mean this.

    Ruler: What… what is this? It is made of wood!

    Trail: Yes, I’m a rugged woodsman!

    Ruler: How do you talk to people with it?

    Trail: “HELLO! CHERRY, I WILL BE HOME SOON! RUSTY, I WILL TAKE YOU FISHING!

  116. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:26 pm [Reply]

    @Hibbleton (#112): Take a look at that link, and check out “one person consent”. Also “expectation of privacy”. Inadmissibility in a court wouldn’t be an issue in any event, if all TJ was looking for was something to show Ann’s superiors to get her fired.

  117. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:30 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#111): I’d like to see an Apartment 2G strip where there is interesting dialogue, plots make sense, characters are likeable and believable – except it’s all drowned out by the noise of the constant furniture rearrangement taking place in the apartment above.

  118. Illustrator Steve
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

    MT – If the ‘main island’ the ruler speaks of is Cuba then Mark should easily blend right in with the population of the little village. After all, he’s been wearing the same style hat and shirt and carrying the same brown leather polaroid camera case since 1959.”

  119. Baka Gaijin
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:38 pm [Reply]

    Missing third panel, Mary Worth: Jim angrily yanks Dawn’s left arm out of its socket in a fit of PTSD-induced rage then lurches through the hospital wielding the arm like a broadsword at everyone who approaches.

  120. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:40 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#102):

    Me too, which is why I thought the one directly upstairs, 4G, would show characters from the waist down. But, we’ve sucked the juice out of a very little jokelet already.

  121. Perky Bird
    October 24th, 2012 at 1:46 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#102): I guess the most common apartment numbering convention is to have the floor number, then the letter, so my mistake!

  122. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    October 24th, 2012 at 2:00 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#116):

    A great plot twist would be if Corporate hears TJ’s tapes, immediately promotes Ann, and sends her around to visit all the franchises and teach them her techniques for ‘revenue optimization’.

  123. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    October 24th, 2012 at 2:02 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#120): Re: “we’ve sucked the juice out of a very little jokelet already.

    Yeah, what is this, Curtis?

  124. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#123):

    I think A3G is much funnier than Curtis, albeit unintentionally.

  125. Alfred E. Neuman
    October 24th, 2012 at 2:29 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#120) said: “@Hogenmogen (#102):

    Me too, which is why I thought the one directly upstairs, 4G, would show characters from the waist down. But, we’ve sucked the juice out of a very little jokelet already.”

    So you’re saying that we’ve finally located Margo’s G-spot?

  126. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    October 24th, 2012 at 2:40 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#124):

    I usually don’t mind Curtis, it does a good job of recognizing what kind of strip it wants to be, and sticking to that premise. But this week’s ‘date with an annoying laugh’ gag done over and over and over just reeks of the author catching an episode of Sienfeld on TV and deciding to take a week off and just crib from that.

  127. Anonymous
    October 24th, 2012 at 2:41 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#86): Avery’s going to star as the Mole Man, which he’ll produce and film entirely in Bubba’s mineshaft. Yeah, crazy on so many levels.

  128. Dood
    October 24th, 2012 at 2:45 pm [Reply]

    @Alfred E. Neuman (#125): Didn’t the last person who went looking for Margo’s G-spot disappear in the Himalayas?

  129. Voshkod
    October 24th, 2012 at 2:56 pm [Reply]

    Mister Jim, famous clairvoyante,
    Had but one arm, nevertheless
    Is known to be the weirdest guy in the hospital,
    (with but one one arm). Here, said he,
    Is your card, the drowned doppleganger sister,
    (Those are eyes that are your eyes. Look!)
    Here is Rita, the Lady of the Rocks,
    The lady of inebriation.
    Here is the man with no spine, and here is his cane,
    And here is the half-wit wife, and this card,
    Which is fat and bearded, is something she carries on her back,
    Which I am (thankfully) forbidden to see. I do not find
    The Dave Man. Fear death by water.

    - T.S. Eliot, Charterstone

  130. Rocky Stoneaxe
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:00 pm [Reply]

  131. Steve the Pocket
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:01 pm [Reply]

    @bombcar (#65): And eye-opening. I’m pretty sure “normal” amusement parks have access to more relevant cartoon properties than Universal. Heck, even freaking Kennywood has a Garfield ride. More funny from Gabe’s blog entry on it:

    We got around to the “Toon Lagoon” section of the park and couldn’t believe it. we were surrounded by Heathcliff the cat and Hagar the Horrible. When we saw the Gasoline Alley display we both started laughing. Who the hell do these brands resonate with? I’m pretty sure the last Gasoline Alley fan died about 20 years ago. I can’t imagine that any of the kids there had any idea who these characters were. I’m 35 years old and I could barley name some of them. I’m always surprised to learn what massive mega corporation owns what. So maybe Universal simply doesn’t have access to something more relevant like Cartoon Network or anything else produced after 1918.

  132. OMEGA SUPREME
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:04 pm [Reply]

    I haven’t read Crankshaft in a long time. For some reason, Darkgate won’t slurp it, so it’s stuck at updated 1157 hours ago.
    Popeye won’t let me read Apartment 3-G or Crock via the Slurper, but Popeye will let me read Popeye.
    Maybe this is all part of Popeye’s plan to become a big star again. “I startsk by killink off ‘dat Crock and Apartment 3-G and soon all ‘da kids will be runnink back ta’ me!”

  133. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:07 pm [Reply]

    @Alfred E. Neuman (#125):

    Not sure. You see, from the waist down, Margo looks very much like an octopus, which could mean she has four g spots….hmmm…4G!

  134. Alfred E. Neuman
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:14 pm [Reply]

    @Dood (#128) said: “@Alfred E. Neuman (#125): Didn’t the last person who went looking for Margo’s G-spot disappear in the Himalayas?”

    Yeah, he was lost in a very deep valley. That’s why guys are wary of trying to get Margo to go Tibet.

  135. Baka Gaijin
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:16 pm [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#130): No, I’ve not been watching that movie again. I’ve not seen it the first time. That still photo could be a psychological test. What do you see?

    * A monster wielding a severed arm?
    * Herman Munster stepping on a child?
    * A Keystone Kop ready to drop a sandbag suspended by the huge rope?
    * A velvet rope from The Brown Derby?
    * A shadow of a mid-century black and white TV camera wired for wireless transmission?
    * A hair shirt?
    * Frankenstein’s dangling screw-style ass attachment?

  136. Alfred E. Neuman
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:16 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#133) said: “@Alfred E. Neuman (#125):

    Not sure. You see, from the waist down, Margo looks very much like an octopus, which could mean she has four g spots….hmmm…4G!”

    Rhymes with “orgy”!

  137. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:16 pm [Reply]

    A3G – I can tell by Bubba’s gratuitous ponytail and over-the-top bad taste in interior design (Picasso lithographs…even in a mineshaft, I mean, really!) that he is a prime candidate to be a sucker for Avery’s “you can be a player in Hollywood,” or “I’ll turn your story into a movie script….and you can direct!!” spiel.

  138. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:18 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#137): excuse me…that should be JP…changed my mind in midsnark

  139. Liam
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:20 pm [Reply]

    MT-”All we have to eat is pancakes. Nothing but pancakes. Pancakes for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.”

    MT 2-”This man will be staying with us for a few days. If you have any daughters keep them away from this man. He looks like the type to sleep with any woman who crosses his path.”

    RMMD-”Even though you are a complete stranger you are a doctor and you saved my wife’s life so I trust you completely.”

  140. KreatureFeatures
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:25 pm [Reply]

    Mark was yachting in southern waters, so let’s assume that the indigenous rebels who kidnapped him are somewhere in the Bahamas Island Chain. If so, what is that blonde baby doing wandering in the background? Jack Elrod, I know you are limited to the clip art you can scrounge up, but at least be informed artistically by this classic image of a Caribbean rebellion:
    Island Revolt

  141. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:35 pm [Reply]

    @KreatureFeatures (#140):

    I thought Miss Momjeans was a dead ringer for Mrs FOOB, Ellie Patterson.

  142. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:44 pm [Reply]

    @Voshkod (#129): Effulgent!

  143. Baka Gaijin
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:44 pm [Reply]

    Has anyone else noticed when Dick Tracy yawns widely, you can see his oddly-shaped uvula?

  144. bbofun
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:48 pm [Reply]

    @S. Stout (#107): “There’s no way for Evans to write himself out of this”- oh, sweet, sweet, deluded soul- of course there’s a way to write himself out of this. The same way he always has- just ignore any semblance of reality and let the status quo conquer all.

  145. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:50 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#120): But 4G would have a better wireless network.

  146. Liam
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:52 pm [Reply]

    MW-”Tonight we are going to stay home and watch ‘Game of Thrones’.

  147. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:54 pm [Reply]

    @Anonymous (#127): The epic motion picture “Mole Man in Bubba’s Mineshaft” smells a little too much of man-love for my tastes. Dirty man-love. Dirty, filthy, grimy man-love.

  148. This Guy
    October 24th, 2012 at 3:56 pm [Reply]

    R==R: “There are FOUR walnuts!”

    PBS: I always thought of Goat as the sensible one, but first he underlines sentences in someone else’s book, and then he wants to take an eraser to it? That book-ruining monster!

    Zits: Wasn’t Meddle My Way the title of Mary Worth’s poorly-received debut album?

  149. Hogenmogen
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:00 pm [Reply]

    RMMD: If Edna croaks because Rex is dicking around trying to brush off this desperate old man and go eat clams, will he still be left Edna’s massive inheritance?

  150. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:00 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#27): Shh! Shh! What if he tries to combine his vapid political opinings with sex-related sniggering? o.O

  151. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:04 pm [Reply]

    Luann: Why is Ann at the counter, anyway? Isn’t that TJ’s job?

  152. _Liz
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:05 pm [Reply]

    MW: “Hey you… get your damn hand off her!”

    JP: Seems like there should be an easier way to get a place to hang your hat and go fishing. Like a Winnebago, or a fishing boat, or a lodge that isn’t owned by drug lords, psychos and criminals.

    SM: Is that a poster of Kraven, or Kraven himself? Stupid 2-D comics.

    Slylock: Maybe this universe is like Narnia. Where you have “talking animals” versus “non-talking animals”. You’re allowed to kill and eat the non-talking ones. Which means the talking ones have to constantly be whistling or mumbling, or wearing a bright blue suit and tie, else get an arrow to the head.

  153. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:06 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#147):

    Grimy, filthy man love?

    Please feel free to continue. I’m just trying to work out the geometry of the 6’3″ Bubba and the 4’11″ Avery getting busy and I can’t quite make it work.

  154. Baka Gaijin
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:07 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#147): I hear there’ll be a cameo by a turkey leg. Half-lodged turkey leg.

  155. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:08 pm [Reply]

    @bbofun (#144):

    TJ sadly realizes that he forgot to put a battery in his tape recorder, but it doesn’t matter because Ann is suddenly transferred to run the new Weenie World in Spain – Mundo Perro Salchicha! – and TJ quits to return to his job servicing sailors down on the pier.

    Don’t go to the pier!

  156. _Liz
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:10 pm [Reply]

    Has anyone created a gallery of Curmudgeon characters? ie. Cuss skunk, Resculini, Senorita Momjeans, ect…? I would like to see that. Just saying.

  157. Hibbleton
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:15 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#116): Very interesting. Thanks for the link!

  158. casino LF
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:20 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#77): I was really hoping that backlinked to something about JP

  159. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:23 pm [Reply]

    @_Liz (#152):

    Liz, you have brought up the Disney Goofy/Pluto Conundrum, in which we try to explain a logic that allows a talking, upright dog to have a non-talking, on all fours dog as a pet.

  160. bbofun
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:25 pm [Reply]

    JP- Yes, you would imagine Bubba would just reject Avery’s proposal outright- but you’re forgetting one essential point; Avery is cute as a bug. No one can resist him. It’s his super-power. Bubba’s just going to laugh heartily, say “I like your style, little man!” and drop his whole criminal lifestyle.

    ASM- I’ve never understood Kraven’s costume- is the vest and cape actually suppose to be the skinned head (including the mane) of a lion, with the face bisected? Are lion’s heads even that big? And, c’mon, even for people who don’t find wearing fur distasteful- that’s a huge “EWWWW!”

    CS- Yeah, this week is shaping up to be a laff-riot. Not that Cranky’s usually funny, but it’s not always just depressing. Not ALWAYS.

    (Interestingly, my spellcheck recognizes “laff”.)(Alright, it’s not interesting to YOU. I was typing to myself, okay?)

    FW- In what way is this a “run-down” neighborhood? Because you drove through an alley at one point?

    GT- Okay- what’s Doyle’s endgame here? Is this some elaborate con he’s pulling? Is he trying to get Gallagher all built up, and then pull the rug out from under him? Or is he going to… aw, hell. I refuse to think about this any more. (Maybe he’s getting revenge on the other football players, somehow? I- ARRRRRGH!)

    Oh, and, remember- Gil Thorpe has “sharp, contemporary story lines and new, graphically outstanding artwork”. So there’s that.

    RMMD- I’m hoping this means June will be left at the party house all by herself, and will get rip-roaringly drunk. Bring on the sexytimes! (It won’t, but, I can dream, can’t I?)

    Pibgorn- You know, I’ve always worried for the days when our PCs and Macs would gain sentience. However, it appears their first move is to prevent Brooke from continuing this “Genie” story. To which I can only say- ALL HAIL OUR NEW BENEVOLENT COMPUTER OVERLORDS!

    Luann- So, he’s been recording her cheating customers for months, huh? But- he hasn’t done ANYTHING with these recordings yet? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WAITING FOR? ARE YOU EXPECTING HER TO KILL A GUY? Honestly,- if you’ve been aware of this for months, and let it continue, you’re culpable! It’s not like this is a police sting operation, where you might allow some crimes to occur in order to get to “the big boss!” SHE IS THE BIG BOSS!

    Okay. Gotta calm down. Ah, here we go- movie theaters across the country are showing a double feature of Frankenstein and Bride of Frankenstein tonight. Not to mention Rifftrax LIVE: BIRDEMIC tomorrow. Ahh, bliss…

  161. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:25 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#155):

    In the LuAnn movie, is TJ played by Bruno Mars?

  162. Marc
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:26 pm [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#150): Then we will all be truly screwed.

  163. Alte Ziege
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:27 pm [Reply]

    @Liam (#139): Rex had better get on that ambulance. Since he’s established a level of care by intervening, he must hand-off the LOL to an equivalent or higher level. If he decides to not go for a ride and the LOL doesn’t survive, for whatever reason, he can be found negligent. So much for a free vacation, Rex. (LOL=Little Old Lady)

  164. Alfred E. Neuman
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:29 pm [Reply]

    @_Liz (#156) said: “Has anyone created a gallery of Curmudgeon characters? ie. Cuss skunk, Resculini, Senorita Momjeans, ect…? I would like to see that. Just saying.”

    And, of course, FOOB’s Gap-Tooth Stare-y Hoo Guy.

  165. Illustrator Steve
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

    @KreatureFeatures (#140): “…what is that blond baby doing wandering in the background?”

    MT – That’s little “Inepto”. The ruler kidnapped him from some rich yachting folks but no one would pay his ransom. He now wanders the little village in hopes that the ruler will fullfill his promise to take him fishing. Fat chance, eh,Mark?

  166. Chaze
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:34 pm [Reply]

    @Alfred E. Neuman (#164):

    You can’t forget the Mark Trail interchangeable male character with the randomly generated WASP name. Bill Tom Pete Ellis Jones Reynolds.

  167. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:37 pm [Reply]

    @bbofun (#160):

    Luann- So, he’s been recording her cheating customers for months, huh? But- he hasn’t done ANYTHING with these recordings yet? … It’s not like this is a police sting operation

    If it was, it would be a clear case of entrapment, given that we never saw her at the register or trying to cheat customers until after TJ demonstrated how it is done, used his techniques to outsell all the other cashiers (what other cashiers?), and then parlayed this sales advantage into a lucrative employment agreement.

    Remember that lucrative agreement, the handwritten one he had Ann sign and that, for a week’s worth of strips, meant that Ann could not speak to him directly and had to grovel in his presence? No? Don’t worry, the author doesn’t either.

  168. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:39 pm [Reply]

    @Alfred E. Neuman (#164):

    Oh, yeah, Gap-Toothed Starey Hoooo guy. Reminds me of that mascot for Mad Magazine back in the day. What was his name, again?

    Going waaaaay back – Fence Post Frank!

  169. Poteet
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:47 pm [Reply]

  170. Poteet
    October 24th, 2012 at 4:51 pm [Reply]

    LUANN — Couldn’t we follow Quill’s doings in Australia for awhile? Just about anything would be better than this.

  171. Anonymous
    October 24th, 2012 at 5:00 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#170): I was going to quip that it was, instead, “literally anything,” but then I remembered that I read 9CL this morning.

  172. casino LF
    October 24th, 2012 at 5:00 pm [Reply]

    Gah, that was me.

  173. Gal Friday
    October 24th, 2012 at 5:10 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#75):

    “Pester” is so much better than “Peter”!

  174. bats :[
    October 24th, 2012 at 5:44 pm [Reply]

    @Illustrator Steve (#49): Actually, that might be Senora Momjeans sister. Perhaps she is a virgin.
    Actually actually, I’m wondering where that little blond kid came from…

  175. bats :[
    October 24th, 2012 at 5:50 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#115): Rusty: “Screw you, Mark! You always promise me that! And you never take me fishing! I hate you!”

    Sassy: “Yip!”

  176. Señor Tortilla
    October 24th, 2012 at 5:52 pm [Reply]

    JP: I really hope at that at this point two things happen.

    a) Avery is brutally murdered off-camera. No blood will be shown, but it will be implied.

    b) Avery is saved, but turns out to be a fraud all along.

  177. Zerowolf
    October 24th, 2012 at 6:03 pm [Reply]

    FW: Tomorrow they accidently drive between two rival gangs annd die in a hail of gunfire. Which means Les finally gets to watch the Blessed Saint Dead Saint Lisa videotape labeled: “When Darren, his wife, and adoptive parents are victims of gang violence.”

  178. Zerowolf
    October 24th, 2012 at 6:04 pm [Reply]

    Zzits: From your mouth to Mary’s ears.

  179. bats :[
    October 24th, 2012 at 6:04 pm [Reply]

    @_Liz (#156): That is a GREAT idea! I showed up here some years back, and I’ve missed a number of the CC Celebrities.

  180. Artist formerly known as Ben
    October 24th, 2012 at 6:15 pm [Reply]

    @_Liz (#152): re Kraven: It looks to be sort of free-standing. I’m thinking cardboard cutout.

  181. Zerowolf
    October 24th, 2012 at 6:15 pm [Reply]

    FC: Thel’s idea of strangulating her brood of monsterous melonheads isn’t working quite as planned.

  182. Anonymous
    October 24th, 2012 at 6:19 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#167): It isn’t entrapment as TJ doesn’t, as far as we know, work for the government. But TJ might get a little on him for aiding and abetting.

  183. Zerowolf
    October 24th, 2012 at 6:27 pm [Reply]

    luann: Except, in most states this is what is known as an illegal wiretape. The one going down here is TJ. But with three squares, a cot, and all the dirty man sex he can handle, I’m not sure TJ will find prison to be all that much of a punishment.

  184. demoncat
    October 24th, 2012 at 6:36 pm [Reply]

    mw and thus dawn begins to learn about restraining orders and then asking mary to borrow a gun as jim proves to be reliving the accident that lost his sister with dawn being his sister.

  185. mr12ozcan
    October 24th, 2012 at 6:49 pm [Reply]

    mark trail – its weird they let our hero andy come along too but if andy is getting rations too hes gonna kick some serious ass . plus why are there always hot babes on these mark trail mysterious islands living with big mustache guys who look like they like to rape and pillage but never do ?
    mary worth- wilber to the rescue ? surely he could hold off this one arm scared of piers freak .maybe jim is upset from the body odor as dawn and jim have the same outfits every lunch

  186. debussy fields
    October 24th, 2012 at 7:11 pm [Reply]

    MT– Mark can’t hand over his cell phone. For the past several days he’s had a fishing pole and a tackle box glued to his hands.

  187. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 7:42 pm [Reply]

    @bbofun (#160): my spellcheck recognizes “laff”.

    Well I find it interesting. My spell checker (in Google Chrome) doesn’t recognize it. My dead tree dictionaries don’t recognize it either. Even the OED, which shows some twenty different ways to spell “laugh” historically doesn’t have it, which surprised me.

    It seems to be pretty common in conjunction with “riot” though, which is how you used it. I’ve always associated “laff riot” with movie posters and things like that. Did your spell checker recognize “laff” by itself, or only with “riot”?

    // There’s a font called Laff Riot – you can get it free here if you want. Also, a troupe of female comedians call themselves that.

  188. seismic-2
    October 24th, 2012 at 7:48 pm [Reply]

    MT: “Cell phone? Don’t be ridiculous – they don’t let you have phones in a jail cell! Why, I was held in a jail in Canada recently myself, and there were no phones. We had to use messenger dogs to communicate with the outside world!”

  189. Ed Bob
    October 24th, 2012 at 7:53 pm [Reply]

    When I get grabbed in a threatening manner, I always exclaim, “Explanation point!” It befuddles the assailant long enough for me to beat a hasty retreat so I can find solace in Mary Worth’s endless stream of platitudes. Or is that bathe in a stream of platypuses?

  190. Liam
    October 24th, 2012 at 7:55 pm [Reply]

    MW-Dawn has caught onto Jim’s terrible secret that he can’t walk and talk at the same time.

  191. bats :[
    October 24th, 2012 at 7:56 pm [Reply]

  192. seismic-2
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:03 pm [Reply]

    @bats :[ (#191): Please tell me that this cross-over ends in this

  193. The Ridger
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:10 pm [Reply]

    @CanuckDownSouth (y#157): Sorry! I did mean in-strip comment. Lots of people here certainly noticed.

  194. Dale
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:23 pm [Reply]

    @Zerowolf (#183):

    LUANN

    If T.J. is recording conversations without video, how does he prove who’s talking?

    Taking secret video could get him in serious trouble.

    Ox is an idiot-savant. Will he go back to Ann and say, “Hah, hah, you’ve been caught”?

  195. Alte Ziege
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:26 pm [Reply]

    @Zerowolf (#183): Using an iPhone to secretly record a conversation is not a violation of the Wiretap Act if done for legitimate purposes, a federal appeals court has ruled.

    “The defendant must have the intent to use the illicit recording to commit a tort of crime beyond the act of recording itself,” the 2nd U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruled. http://www.wired.com/threatlevel/2010/08/covert-iphone-audio-recording/

  196. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:30 pm [Reply]

    @bbofun (#160): You know, I’d be sympathetic to the guy for his computer troubles, having just weathered a round of “send-it-to-the-shop” anxiety myself, but for three things:

    1) Dude, if you make your living on a computer, you need a back-up system. Not just files, but a way of working in the absence of your computer.

    2) He had to turn it into some weird metaphor about writing on cave walls, with overflown vocabulary, and wrote it in tiny, tiny cramped handwriting to boot. (Raising the question: what did he use to write and upload that? Clearly he has access to some sort of graphics program.)

    3) It’s preventing him from producing Pibgorn and drawing pictures of Thorax. ‘nuf said.

  197. Amos Snarkadder
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:52 pm [Reply]

    @Perky Bird (#99):

    That would be the strip called “Apartment 3F.”

    Or it could have been “Apartment 3D,” but we’d all need those special glasses.

  198. Liam
    October 24th, 2012 at 8:58 pm [Reply]

    @bats :[ (#191):

    Life is brutal.

  199. Amos Snarkadder
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:07 pm [Reply]

    @_Liz (#156):

    Has anyone created a gallery of Curmudgeon characters?

    @bats :[ (#179):

    That is a GREAT idea!

    While we’re at it, can we include a couple dozen no-neck bastards sired by Daddy Keane during his frequent “business trips”? E.g., Polly, Jessy, Willy, BJ, …

  200. bats :[
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:10 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#192): what surprises me is that everyone here was too classy to mention the upskirt shot of Edna in the back of the ambulance. Either that, or I missed it.

  201. Amos Snarkadder
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:14 pm [Reply]

    @Ed Bob (#189):

    When I get grabbed in a threatening manner, I always exclaim, “Explanation point!” It befuddles the assailant long enough for me to beat a hasty retreat so I can find solace in Mary Worth’s endless stream of platitudes.

    Mount that baby on a key fob and market it as the “Exclamazer”!
    But wait, if you call in the next five minutes, we’ll give you two “Exclamazers” at one low price! That’s one for your purse, one for your… uh… your other purse!

  202. Zerowolf
    October 24th, 2012 at 9:21 pm [Reply]

    @Alte Ziege (#195): In many states (like Massachusetts) it is illegal to make an audio recording of anyone without their consent or a court order allowing for such recordings without that person’s consent even if that person is in public place and does not have a reasonable expectation of privacy. (Oddly enough in Massachusetts you can record video without audio all you want in a public place, go figure…) This is why you always hear “…this call may be monitored for quality control purposes…” as a CYA measure. Some states do not have a wiretaping law that applies to private citizens making recordings of other private citizens without their consent. Luann-verse may take place in one of those states. We know the Luann-verse state doesn’t have unemployment insurance….

    The Federal Wiretap Act only applies to Federal cases and does not trump individual state wiretaping laws until the Supreme Court rules otherwise and overturns a state’s wiretaping laws for being more stringent than the Federal law. Given the current make up of the SCOTUS, not a likely occurance anytime in the foreseeable future.

    An act may be illegal on a state level, but legal on the Federal level, or vice versa, such as Medical Marijuana Laws. The “prescriptions” may be legal as far as a state’s courts are concerned but the Feds can sweep in and haul them all off to jail to await trial under Federal laws anytime they choose.

  203. Poteet
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:01 pm [Reply]

    JP — Now that we are finally seeing Avery’s eyes, I find his expression kinda creepy. It was even creepier when I realized that it somehow reminded me of the original animated version of Cruella Deville.

  204. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:02 pm [Reply]

    @Zerowolf (#202): I really don’t understand the rationale behind these laws. If you and I have a conversation, and you admit to a bunch of nefarious crimes, and I simply remember what we say, there is no problem. There would be no problem even if I were like the fictional Archie Goodwin in the Nero Wolfe books, who could remember hours of conversation verbatim, a human tape recorder, in fact. But suppose we had a conversation, and I took notes. No problem with that, I wouldn’t have to tell you I was taking notes, and if I were called upon in a court to testify to the conversation those notes would certainly be admissible evidence. What if — I were to go to The Local Community College (maybe I’ll meet Luann!), and take courses in Gregg stenography. Then we have our conversation (on the phone, say), and I take down every single word. Would I have to tell you I was doing that? I doubt it. What if I were to hire a court reporter, put the phone on speaker, and have the court reporter take down every single word? Would I have to tell you I was doing this? If not, how does this differ philosophically or legally from using a tape recorder or other electronic device?

    I don’t expect you know the answers, but it seem to make the basis of wiretap laws very shaky in theory.

  205. Sgt. Stoned
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:07 pm [Reply]

    MT: Special guest appearance by a young Fidel Castro who manages to lose his hat and change his shirt between p1 and p2.

    MW: Or maybe the picture of Jim and his “sister” was one of himself photoshopped with a pic of Dawn secretly taken with his cell-phone.

  206. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:39 pm [Reply]

    @Hibbleton (#112): You always have the right to record yourself but if the intent is to record the other party without notice, in some (all?) states this is illegal or at least inadmissible.
    It’s why TJ has to say “beep” every fifteen seconds.

    @Voshkod (#129): Say, this Eliot guy’s good!

    @Baka Gaijin (#135): Son of Frankenstein is the best of the Frankenstein movies. It’s got it all going, with Basil Rathbone and Bela Lugosi in the cast as well.

    @Chaze (#159): Pluto, Goofy… and then there’s a middle category of four-legged dogs that talk: Scamp!

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#180): It looks to be sort of free-standing. I’m thinking cardboard cutout.
    Nah. This is comic books. Everything’s real. You see a giant accordion, it’s fully functional, with reeds and different stops and the hook that holds it closed when you carry it around. So if you see a giant Kraven, then it’s three-dimensional, made of flexible fleshlike material, probably has a pulse, and is capable of marauding, if circumstances call for it. Odds are, it won’t. Odds are good it’ll just stand there and be forgotten soon, but when everybody in the world is a cardboard cutout, then there’s no distinction between it and the ‘real’ people.

  207. tallyHO
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:49 pm [Reply]

    @Sgt. Stoned (#205):

    Exaaaaaactly!

    I mentioned at the outset, when “Jim” told of his ferocious ferry fatality, that the fact he hadn’t heard that someone from his hometown was in a cruiseship accident that I called BS.

    Dawn and Wilbur would have been interviewed on TV and Radio and in the Newspapers for a good week. The nurses would have talked of it. Since they never said he was in a coma or anything, you would have to think that he would have heard something. This is especially true since he was in a nautical nutcracker himself.

    While I’ll admit that I was wrong that “Jim” isn’t Mary Meddleworth in disguise, it is still possible there was no sister. But, Dawn’s too busy being sucked into his drama to just go and talk with someone who can verify his facts. Hell, as far as we know, the girl hasn’t either done any volunteer work at all and just goes to the hospital for lunch as she skips her college classes.

    Bah! He could be pulling the halloween hair over her eyes and she wouldn’t know it.

    Not that I care all that much, mind you. I am still more intrigued by how in sync Dagwood is with National Food “Holidays”. Today actually is National Bologna Day.

  208. Sequitur
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:55 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#207): It’s National Bologna Day?

    Rats. I missed an opportunity to take a bologna to lunch today.

  209. rumpled tulip
    October 24th, 2012 at 10:58 pm [Reply]

    @bbofun (#160): Ah, here we go- movie theaters across the country are showing a double feature of Frankenstein and Bride of Frankenstein tonight. Not to mention Rifftrax LIVE: BIRDEMIC tomorrow. Ahh, bliss…

    I had to miss the Frankenstein double feature tonight but you can bet your bippy I’ll be at Rifftrax tomorrow night!

  210. Mr. O'Malley
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:03 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#204): If you had sex with someone, and that person subsequently did a series of watercolor paintings of the event, wouldn’t that be different than if they had made a surreptitious video of it?

  211. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:17 pm [Reply]

    Thanks to bOINGbOING, I just saw this incredibly rendered series of Popeye studies.

  212. tallyHO
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:18 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#208):

    Well, it sounds like someone needs to coordinate his calendar with “Blondie”. If it were not for the Diner based strip earlier this week, I would not have know the World Series of Something or another is occurring sometime soon.

    Admittedly, (deep-fried adMITTedly) Nat’l Bologna Day rises above it all.

    It is a time when we should be solemn, and shun salami. We shouldn’t complain, setting aside our beefs. We can still have lots of sex, we just need to be mindful of how much pork is consumed. We should celebrate Ameri>hiccupbuuuuuurrrrrp!< we should celebrate Pastimes, and hold off on the Pastrami for a day or two.

    Happy Bologna Day, Everybody!

    (let’s just hope the Pink Slime doesn’t spoil the day! I am not that old, but I remember the Coldcut War….brrrrrr!)

  213. Rocky Stoneaxe
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:20 pm [Reply]

    @Mr. O’Malley (#210): Are you speaking from experience?

  214. tallyHO
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:23 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#211):

    Yeah. I saw an image of Real Popeye earlier today.

    I’ll stick with the abstracted versions. So, if there’s more than just the one I saw, I’m not gonna sully the cartoons I have in me noggin’.

    Photorealistic rendering/painting/drawing is often pointless. It is impressive but it is only so when considering the artist who did it, not so—to me—looking at the art. And, somehow realizing cartoons….aaaannnnhhh…stick to casting actors and models. Let make up and wardrobe dress em up proper.

    Cartoons made for gags still work best for gags. Why, just look at “Mark Trail”. Look at it. Just look at it.

  215. Rocky Stoneaxe
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:25 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#212):

    My bologna has a first name, it’s O-s-c-a-r. My bologna has a second name, it’s M-a-y-e-r.

  216. tallyHO
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:34 pm [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#215):
    Good.
    Good.

    You’re alright, Stoneaxe. You’re a good Joe.

    Now, if your bologna’s first name was I-v-a-n and its last name was B-o-l-o-g-s-h-i-v-i-c then I might believe you ain’t so deli-tful.

  217. tallyHO
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:36 pm [Reply]

    //Man, that was a tad bit conceptual.

    Me might be a might rusty at the typed Ha-has.

  218. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:36 pm [Reply]

    @Mr. O’Malley (#210): Is it really the same question? What do you think?

    // Is the video tasteful? (I hate vulgarity). Can I get a copy?
    // They say the camera adds ten pounds. Maybe I should go with the watercolors.

  219. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:46 pm [Reply]

    @Mr. O’Malley (#210): @Nehemiah Scudder (#218):

    Ok, thinking about it, there is a pretty big difference between having a conversation and having sex.* And, having sex, you really do have a presumption of privacy. A conversation — any conversation — not so much.

    * If that’s not your experience, maybe we should talk. NO, wait…!

  220. seismic-2
    October 24th, 2012 at 11:55 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#214): Carl Barks’s oil paintings of Donald Duck, Uncle Scrooge, and the other “Disney Ducks” whom he drew for so many years as a comics book artist and author, sell at auction prices around $200K. One particular Duck oil painting by Barks sold for $500K. Is it great art? Perhaps that is entirely the wrong question to ask; it is instead something that certain people enjoy very much, to the point that they will raid their own money bins to own one. The original Duck comic books that Barks drew and that sold for a dime meant a great deal to those people, and now they want a full-blown, more nearly realistic rendition on canvas of their beloved Duckburg characters as drawn by those comics’ creator. They don’t consider the paintings to diminish their cherished childhood memories of the comic books; rather, they celebrate them.

  221. bbofun
    October 25th, 2012 at 12:03 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#187): My spellcheck does, indeed, recognize “laff” all on it’s own. No riot necessary. But i do realize that’s recognizing “spellcheck” as a word, as well, which it never use to do. Perhaps an update?

    Hm- I think i recently did add a spellcheck in a google chrome update, IIRC that was supposedly using the same sort of algorithms (or whatnot) as Google uses for search recognition, so maybe that explains it.

  222. Droopy Says
    October 25th, 2012 at 12:46 am [Reply]

    Spiderbland: The Vegas Village Voice mentions the presidential election, so at some level Lieber and Lee have an awareness of the real world. Otherwise, not so much.

    Funky Worthlesshasbeen: Maybe the next time jump can toss these people back into the Seventies, because there’s nothing fun here.

    Family Circus: By the time she reaches Billy’s age, Dolly will settle for becoming either a damned soul or a demon, just to get out of the Keane Kompound.

    Shoe: I laughed, but only because a recognizable joke is so unexpected here.

    Mark Trail: Caucasian natives, complete with an old guy named Pop. It’s the Great White Fail.

    Jugs Parker Oh for fuck’s sake, what idiot is going to put a solar farm in a Pennsylvania mountain valley? You just can’t grow solars that far north.

  223. tallyHO
    October 25th, 2012 at 12:51 am [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#220):

    Yeah.
    I’m familiar with Barks’ paintings. Don’t get me wrong, I understand people do covet and cherish paintings of established cartoon characters. I’m speaking for myself mainly when discussing how making them very realistic seems pointless as an endeavor and as an exercise. Treating them seriously seems wrong to me.

    On a very basic level it is way too left-brained of an endeavor.
    In this I include things like What would the Homer Simpson look like if a real person had his features; the skeletal framework of Charlie Brown; and, most 3D animated feature cartoons often with a hair too much detail for something that worked just fine with pen and ink, a simple color palette.

    Admittedly, my preference is linework and realizing an abstract idea of people in a humorous, appealing fashion. Taking it too far beyond that looks ugly to me. Even if that is the point of the artist, to magnify the grotesque, again I say, why bother?

    You state there is gold in them thar hills. Sure. But, there’s gold because Carl Barks or Chuck Jones painted those things, or maybe Roy Lichtenstein did. For Lee Romao to do it…well, 1) doing one to see if it can be done is fine; 2) making and selling them, it ain’t his property (if it is officially commissioned, I’ll step back and eat some Heckle or Jeckle. If he worked on the originals (he didn’t) then sure what the hey, let him translate his own visions.

    There’s too much of the selling ones own art based on other’s property happening online as is. While I doubt it has happened to mine, something seems creatively weak to try an make a buck off of someone else’s or some thing else’s IP.

    Now, I will add a caveat….IF Fair Use covers this, cool. He can make it AND sell it. But, it is still creatively weak, times two given the endeavor in the first place. That’s just how I feel about that. No offensive meant to someone who wants to support the artist or this type of thing. Artists need all they can get but I’d rather see them get something for something they wholly created and own.

  224. Poteet
    October 25th, 2012 at 12:56 am [Reply]

    JP — So, um, this pretty much confirms that Bubba’s ten-acre (or is it fifteen-acre?) pot field really is in full sun below a well-traveled road in a part of the country that has plenty of small planes. Take that solar deal, Bubba. You’re a hunka hunka purple love, but your business planning leaves a lot to be desired.

  225. Mr. O'Malley
    October 25th, 2012 at 12:58 am [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#213): Well, it was charcoal sketches, not watercolors. She passed them around at a party we were both attending. They were soft-core though.

  226. Poteet
    October 25th, 2012 at 1:00 am [Reply]

    MW — “Jim…let go of my arm. You’re squeezing it so hard my eyes are crossing.”

  227. Alison
    October 25th, 2012 at 1:02 am [Reply]

    I knew there was something wrong with Jim as soon as Mary Worth acted like she didn’t approve of Dawn’s relationship with him. If you don’t listen to Mary Worth, your lover will turn out to be screwy in the head and try to kill you for wanting to go near a body of water. Let that be a lesson, kiddies.

  228. Poteet
    October 25th, 2012 at 1:07 am [Reply]

    RMMD — “It would be my honor to buy you lunch. And also dish about that building where you’re staying, best known around here as the Slut House.”

  229. Poteet
    October 25th, 2012 at 1:14 am [Reply]

    CRANKSHAFT — I hope she didn’t also give him a cell phone or bail him out of jail. JUDGE JUDY, here we come.

  230. seismic-2
    October 25th, 2012 at 1:16 am [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#223): There’s too much of the selling ones own art based on other’s property
    Funny thing you mentioned Roy Lichtenstein

    Anyway, my own opinion of the “realistic” treatment of comic characters is that if a caricaturist can render a real person or an actual setting as a 2-D “cartoon-y” drawing, then what’s wrong with reversing the process?

  231. Poteet
    October 25th, 2012 at 1:16 am [Reply]

    GA — I’ve only read the past two days of this story, so I’m really hoping it won’t turn out the son died in a truck crash ten years ago or some such.

  232. Mr. O'Malley
    October 25th, 2012 at 1:26 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#219): So there is a line somewhere. The question is just where it is.

    I’m not a legal scholar so I don’t know the answer.

    I think this is kind of creepy, but I’m perfectly OK with people who mount a video camera on the handlebars of their bike. As long as they’re riding safely.

  233. Dale
    October 25th, 2012 at 3:36 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#206):

    The consent to record issue came up during the Bill Clinton soap opera. Someone was taping in or from a state (Maryland?) that did require consent.

  234. Dale
    October 25th, 2012 at 3:44 am [Reply]

    MARK TRAIL

    Pirate leader’s gun seems to vanish and return.
    He should just wear a handgun if he feels the need to be armed.
    NOT like the Phantom. That arrangement is really preposterous.

  235. Mr. O'Malley
    October 25th, 2012 at 4:34 am [Reply]

    @Poteet (#231): What with the lending of the jacket it seems to be based on that classic urban legend song Laurie (Strange Things Happen) by Dickey Lee.

    This was written by psychologist Dr. Milton “Mitt” Addington and recorded as a single (TCF Hall 102) by Dickey Lee. The song was inspired by a story that ran in a Memphis newspaper in 1964, written by a 15-year-old girl named Cathie Harmon. Dr. Addington credited her and shared his royalties from the song with her.
    The original article by Cathie Harmon was possibly inspired by the legend of Resurrection Mary, described as a shy young woman with very cold hands. A number of young men reportedly encountered her at dance parties in Chicago beginning in the 1930s. Escorted or given a ride home, she typically asks to be dropped off at Resurrection Cemetery on Archer Avenue, where she vanishes, asking her escort not to follow her. In 1939 a man named Jerry Palus met her at the Liberty Grove dance hall and she told him her actual home address; going there the following day, he found an older woman who verified that she had had such a daughter, who had died many years before. Her picture was identical to the girl Jerry had escorted to the graveyard.

  236. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 25th, 2012 at 6:04 am [Reply]

    @Mr. O’Malley (#232): And there, who says Beetle Bailey is not cutting edge?

  237. John C Fremont
    October 25th, 2012 at 6:13 am [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#215): @tallyHO (#216):
    “Mein bratwurst has a first name,
    It’s F-R-I-T-Z.
    Mein bratwurst has a second name,
    It’s S-C-H-N-A-C-K-E-N-P-F-E-F-F-E-R-H-A-U-S-E-N.”

    MT – “Welcome, son! Welcome to Joad Island.”

  238. Mr. O'Malley
    October 25th, 2012 at 6:26 am [Reply]

    JP: He’s got a point. A solar farm could power a lot of grow lights down in that mineshaft.

    MT: More examples for Chomsky of sentences that are grammatically correct but would never be uttered by a native speaker.

    MW: If I had an arm that grew and shrunk from panel to panel, I think I would be a bit more careful about what I did with it.

    RMMD: I can’t wait to visit San Diego and visit all these places full of bathing-suited women eating clams.

  239. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 25th, 2012 at 7:02 am [Reply]

    Fred Bassett: This couple would fit right in on Ballard Street.

    Pluggers: Is that a double door? You’ll need to open the other side too, pretty girl.

    Sherman’s Lagoon/Mark Trail: Mashup!

  240. gleeb
    October 25th, 2012 at 7:04 am [Reply]

    Slylock: So, is he gonna be a stand-up guy, or will he rat out his raccoon accomplice?

    Beetle: The folks at Ft Meade don’t even respect Halftrack enough to try hiding them.

    ‘shaft: So we begin on the story of Jonathan Harris, gigolo.

    Curtis: “A popular club downtown” isn’t as generic as “that popular club downtown”, but I’d still be wary of creeping Herbandjamalism.

    ‘bean: Ann quickly steps in to prevent her husband describing all the “fun” they had in excruciating detail. Sure, she wants grandkids too, but this isn’t the way.

    Mark: Not even a Capella singing?

    June Morgan’s Bivalve Quest!: June’s going to get her fried clams and not even have to pay for them. Things are looking up for her.

    Dick: “‘Man to man’? I’m not going to have explain that to you instead of Junior too, am I?”

    Phantom: Will Dr Guran please just slap the Ghost-who-takes-days-to-get-the-point and tell him what’s going on?

  241. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 25th, 2012 at 7:16 am [Reply]

    QC: White haired guy with the soul patch must be a blogger. See, this is what happens when you work at home and no longer have to wear clothes.

  242. CanuckDownSouth
    October 25th, 2012 at 7:37 am [Reply]

    @Droopy Says (#222): JP: Pennsylvania? So it’s not low-latitude *and* it’s in a valley. There would be significant hours of shadow, low noontime sun, and strong weather that can endanger the solar panels. I suppose Avery could be about to teach Bubba how to tap into investor / government sources to fund dubious Next Big Thing projects that the funders are too excited about to check carefully, but I don’t think the strip is cynical enough.

  243. Peanut Gallery
    October 25th, 2012 at 7:41 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#241): Somebody makes a series of cartoon drawings of you and posts them on the internet?

  244. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 25th, 2012 at 8:00 am [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#243): Precisely. Trust no one.

  245. Droopy Says
    October 25th, 2012 at 8:03 am [Reply]

    @CanuckDownSouth (#242): I’m sure they said the fishing lodge was in Pennsylvania, but if someone can show that I’m wrong, I’ll be delighted to learn that I haven’t wasted valuable memory cells on a JP factoid.

    I don’t know what kind of solar farm Avarice means, but it doesn’t matter if it uses solar cells, mirrors to concentrate sunlight on a boiler, or anything else. The solar constant is 1340 watts per square meter; that’s on a clear day with the sun directly overhead, which doesn’t happen in Pennsylvania. Let’s say you can collect 1000 watts per square meter with a panel that tracks the sun. Down in the valley, you might get six hours of sunlight per day, maximum; at ten cents per kilowatt/hour, your one square meter panel earns sixty cents per day. Even if you get three hundred clear days per year, that’s $180 per square meter. Priceofweed.com says that Pennsylvania Pot goes for over $400 per ounce; another source says you can produce up to seven ounces of marijuana from one outdoor plant. Presumably you can grow more than one plant per square meter, while you might have trouble fully covering the pot farm’s ten acres with efficient solar cells.

    In other words, if you want to turn sunlight into money, you get a better profit margin by using cannabis plants as your solar-power collectors.

  246. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    October 25th, 2012 at 8:25 am [Reply]

    @Droopy Says (#245):

    I think the Pennsylvania location was inferred from the shape of the road signs back when they were driving in, which vaguely resembled the Keystone State logo.

    Whatever state they are in – the key to successful location of your outdoor farm is that it not be visible to low-flying aircraft. Americans have become indifferent to continuous fly-overs by law enforcement surveillance looking for illegal plants so that they can break down the doors of the owners late at night, shoot their dogs, and throw the family on the floor while screaming obscenities, preperatory to tearing up the house and hauling the occupants away in handcuffs.

    It would seem that this criteria would be diametrically opposite to the key to a successful solar farm – unimpeded access to the sun.

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