The Comics Curmudgeon

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ACTION! EXCITEMENT! ARTIFICIAL LIMBS!

Judge Parker, 5/7/08

Hey, kids, welcome to Judge Parker, where nothing ever happens for months and months and months, but when it happens, it really happens! A sexy (admittedly, we can’t see her face, but this being Judge Parker, “sexy” is a good bet) lady terrorist hell-bent on revenge! A cancer-ridden old lady in a wheelchair transformed into an unwilling human bomb! A battle royal between an enraged woman and an ex-Navy SEAL with no legs! Enjoy your next several days of thrilling action before we get back to the boring. In panel two, Momma Steve’s creepy, flesh-colored gag makes her look like some kind of mouthless horror, which hopefully indicates that the denouement of this story will be as deviant as the one in this strip’s pervy trip to France.

Crock, 5/7/08

I’m sort of charmed by the phrase “marked-down polyester from Wal-Mart,” which implies that you can go into the world’s largest retailer and buy great bolts of cloth to take home to your wife, who will sew them into the clothes for you and your children. It reads like it’s been written by someone who’s heard second-hand about developments in retail since the 19th century, but has never actually been in a store per se.

Update: Uh, apparently you can buy fabric at Wal-Mart with which to make your own clothes, like they did in olden days. Ha ha! Josh is a moron!

Ziggy, 5/7/08

Ziggy is so sad and lonely that he’s turned to the bottle; but, far from forgetting his problems, in his drunken state he’s become even more maudlin, and is now just sitting at the table by himself weeping openly. The waiter, profoundly unsettled by the raw emotional pain on display, covers up his discomfort by cracking wise.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, May 7, 2008 at 06:15 pm and is filed under Crock, Judge Parker, Ziggy. |

192 responses to “ACTION! EXCITEMENT! ARTIFICIAL LIMBS!”

Mac
May 7th, 2008 at 6:21 pm [Reply]

Have we ever actually seen that Steve has no legs? I mean, they keep saying that he doesn’t, but he’s always behind a desk or (as in this example) the panel shows him from the waist up. I like to think that in the stunning denouement, Steve will remember that he actually does have legs, and uses them to kick some ass.
Uncle Lumpy
May 7th, 2008 at 6:21 pm [Reply]

Ooooh! Sexy Samira will take unfair advantage of Steve’s leglessness, and Gloria will pwn her in fury! Just in the nick of time! With a frying pan! (Oh, wait — that’s been done).

Anyway — catfight!
Jane
May 7th, 2008 at 6:23 pm [Reply]

which implies that you can go into the world’s largest retailer and buy great bolts of cloth to take home to your wife, who will sew them into the clothes for you and your children

Well, you can, actually. Every Wal-mart I’ve been in has a fabric section, and there is usually a big table of marked-down crappy stuff.
BigTed
May 7th, 2008 at 6:24 pm [Reply]

Is the suddenly action-packed “Judge Parker” doing some kind of crossover series with “The Phantom”? If so, I bet the Jungle Patrol is in for one heck of a class-action lawsuit.
chrissymonster
May 7th, 2008 at 6:25 pm [Reply]

walmart does sell fabric.
Johnny
May 7th, 2008 at 6:29 pm [Reply]

“… which implies that you can go into the world’s largest retailer and buy great bolts of cloth to take home to your wife, who will sew them into the clothes for you and your children.”

You can do exactly that, can’t you? Wal-Mart sells fabric.
commodorejohn
May 7th, 2008 at 6:29 pm [Reply]

Ziggy weeping makes me smile.
Johnny
May 7th, 2008 at 6:29 pm [Reply]

Oops, a couple others beat me to it.
commodorejohn
May 7th, 2008 at 6:30 pm [Reply]

P.S. Even more so when it’s paired with an attempted “joke” that only further highlights his misery.

P.P.S. Yes, Wal-Mart does sell fabric – I had to purchase some when I had to make a robe so I could go to a costume party as the MAS-ter from “Manos” The Hands Of Fate.
McPerson
May 7th, 2008 at 6:31 pm [Reply]

It’s official, Steve studied law by playing Phoenix Wright. At least he’s got the pose down. I don’t think even Phoenix would be a slacker enough to do a “week’s worth of work” in a month.
Diamond Joe
May 7th, 2008 at 6:36 pm [Reply]

A3-G: Alan’s slept with the lights on ever since he saw the “Zuni warrior doll” segment of Trilogy of Terror on TV one night.

Miss Buxley Wednesday! : So what are the rest of us, ghosted products of God’s studio artists?

CtH: I’m guessing “Mindies” is pronounced with a short “i,” but it amuses me to think of it with a long “i,” indicating a family with psi powers.

DT: Although Dab Stract killed Cole Lector himself, he knows how angry Dick can get when he doesn’t get his daily legally-sanctioned homicide in. That’s why, in the first panel, he’s defending himself against the possibility that Dick is just pretending to be friendly in order to deliver a surprise punch in the nuts.

Luann: “And besides, orientation is something you’re born with. Wait, that is what you’re talking about, right?”

Momma: “I’m not worried. Momma told me she’s being ‘careful’ careful.”

Preteena: Stick makes kind of a cute Bo Peep. But it looks like her soul was possessed or something between panels 1 and 2.

S-M: “Can you believe this woman, Mr. Headboard?”

StF: Somehow, this is not a strip I pictured furthering Rex Morgan’s Male Nipple Revolution.

Amused me: Bizarro, Cathy (!), One Big Happy, PBS, Quigmans
Diamond Joe
May 7th, 2008 at 6:37 pm [Reply]

Oops, forgot to make a witticism above about it being an edited repost. And since I still can’t think of one, I’ll leave it at this.
Islamorada Girl
May 7th, 2008 at 6:41 pm [Reply]

Has Mama Steve become a Rastafarian since he went to work this morning? Sure looks like she’s wearing a soulful knit hat.
Besides, “Adbul Hakim” is like being John Doe in an Muslim country.
bats :[
May 7th, 2008 at 6:43 pm [Reply]

Wal-Mart is well on its way to discontinuing its fabrics departments. The last holdouts were in stores in small enough towns where there aren’t any other alternatives (or so the company said–I think that’s been reneged on, too). Why sell inexpensive (and pretty good quality) fabric when your customers can be forced to buy a lot of crappy, ready-made wear?
(I don’t mean this as a political comment, just that most moderate-to-large city Wal-Marts have been without a fabric department since 2006, …ah, yes, once again Crock has its finger on the pulse of, um, something… And heck, even when there was fabric, there wasn’t any keen religiously-themed FC material, so why bother?)
TheDiva
May 7th, 2008 at 6:50 pm [Reply]

Also confirming the existence of Wal-Mart fabrics–I bought up some remnants (bits of fabric left over after the rest of the bolt is used) there for my costume the year I went as Sally from The Nightmare Before Christmas. Anyway:

HotC: I don’t hate this comic as much as some people here do, but could we please get to the inevitable ending where Heart wakes up and this is all a dream? Please? I already know way more about the pop culture interests of tweens than I ever, ever wanted to know.
TheDiva
May 7th, 2008 at 6:51 pm [Reply]

Then again, bats :[ is probably right–I haven’t set foot in a Wal-Mart for quite some time (several reasons, never mind now).
Lolsworth
May 7th, 2008 at 6:54 pm [Reply]

The title should be ACTION! EXCITMENT! ARTIFICIAL! LIMBS! AND! THE! BITTER! TEARS! OF! FATHOMLESS! DESPAIR!
JP (not Judge Parker)
May 7th, 2008 at 6:55 pm [Reply]

I’m with bats :[ – Crock’s joke is perilously close to being outdated. I suppose that’s better than they do on most days though.

Can someone explain what the joke in Ziggy is supposed to be? Is there a joke? Not that it isn’t good to see Ziggy crying, mind you.
trey le parc
May 7th, 2008 at 6:55 pm [Reply]

Well, this is nice, but I was kind of hoping Steve’s mom had keeled over in her wheelchair. Against a dramatic background highlighting the spartan furnishings of their home, Gloria would rush to comfort Steve as he collapsed against the overturned wheelchair. Pushing aside Grandma’s spindly, misshapen legs Gloria would pin Steve’s hands at his sides with her muscular thighs and bear down on his chest with her even more massive chest until they both collapsed amid a tangle of thrashing limbs. Finally, his will and resolve in tatters, Steve would against-all-odds lurch to his feet, creakily at first and then with more conviction, gather Gloria in his arms, step over the lifeless body of his mother, and carry Gloria upstairs to the ravishing she so clearly has been angling for.

But a terrorist is OK, too.
Dean Booth of the Affect Ad Patrol
May 7th, 2008 at 6:56 pm [Reply]

RE Walmart: Yes, some do sell fabric, though I’ve read that they refuse to stock any with pictures of genitalia on it.
Laura c
May 7th, 2008 at 7:01 pm [Reply]

The Wal Mart here sells fabric. But then again, this is polygamist country.
The fact that JP’s first panel does not have a top on it really threw me this morning. It made me think it was taking place in an outdoor bazaar. I kept thinking “but how did they get…? Is this a dream…? No legs got knocked out and this is a dream, right?” Then I saw the old lady and gradually pieced it all together.
bobk
May 7th, 2008 at 7:05 pm [Reply]

JP re: Ziggy

I guess they’re playing off the fact that snooty wine folk supposedly apply human characteristics to wine, such as “amusing” and “impetuous” and “provacative”, and is contrasting that with the fact that no wine is likely to make Ziggy less unhappy.

ha? Ha?
Violet
May 7th, 2008 at 7:11 pm [Reply]

Throughout the years I’ve given to reading Ziggy, I’ve never really expected a payoff. I just considered it one of those acts of mild daily masochism to which we are all so prone. I was clearly mistaken, in that today’s installment is, at the risk of sounding hyperbolic, roughly the single awesomest thing ever. It’s unfortunate, but probably not coincidental, that the point at which Ziggy’s author has finally grasped the concept of making an actual funny joke is also the point at which he appears to have reached the apex of irreversible suicidal depression.
Cyhip
May 7th, 2008 at 7:13 pm [Reply]

My family actually buys a lot of fabric at Wal-Mart. It’s nice and affordable.
rhymes with puck
May 7th, 2008 at 7:13 pm [Reply]

I have to admit that when I saw today’s Ziggy, the thought of him being sad and lonely, crying in a restaurant while the waiter made horrible jokes at his expense, made me laugh and laugh and laugh. Then I realized that today’s strip is probably a fair reflection of Verne “Mini-me” Troyer’s actual life…and I laughed and laughed and laughed again.
Benjamin Baxter
May 7th, 2008 at 7:17 pm [Reply]

This might be a little off-color, but:

“I’d never figured Judge Parker to MFFFF dive.”

… and it isn’t even funny.

http://awaitingtenure.wordpress.com/
AhClem
May 7th, 2008 at 7:21 pm [Reply]

A3G – After hearing someone TaThap-TaThap-TaThapping up the stairs, and then CaClicking the door lock, Alan LaLurches out of bed, RaReeling from his drug-induced stupor, and then PaPukes all over the new arrival’s shoes.

This is your BaBrain on drugs, kids.
One-eyed Wolfdog
May 7th, 2008 at 7:27 pm [Reply]

JP dropped the ball there. Should’ve been, “…and you are Stephen Shannon. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”
Laura c
May 7th, 2008 at 7:31 pm [Reply]

24 – My family grows flax and beats it on rocks and soaks it in water and hangs it up to dry and then spins into linen and wears that.
Seriously, there’s no JoAnn’s where you live?
ComixLovin'Cat
May 7th, 2008 at 7:38 pm [Reply]

To #28 – LOL

If I could hearken back to the comments Josh originally made about the end of the “pervy trip to Paris,” the only thing more disturbing than drawn humans without nipples is amorphously gendered frogs with nipples .
Ridureyu
May 7th, 2008 at 7:44 pm [Reply]

I’ve bought fabric at Wal-Mart, and I am neither a mother nor a desert nomad. I used it to mummify my roommate.
One-eyed Wolfdog
May 7th, 2008 at 7:48 pm [Reply]

As long as I’m dropping pointless references, the lady in the wheelchair very much puts the phrase “I have no mouth & I must scream” into my head.
KH
May 7th, 2008 at 7:55 pm [Reply]

#28 – I had exactly the same thought. Maybe Gloria will be revealed as Princess Buttercup!
AeroSquid
May 7th, 2008 at 8:08 pm [Reply]

Crock: It’s a Parade of Values!

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3078/2474988312_4445025860_o.png
One-eyed Wolfdog
May 7th, 2008 at 8:10 pm [Reply]

I certainly think of her as my little buttercup *smack* no! that is not an out-loud thought! *smack* bad!
Patty Cake
May 7th, 2008 at 8:10 pm [Reply]

#9 commodorejohn: I once went to a party as one of the lingerie-clad hotties, and my date, of course, was Torgo. I wanted him to be the Maaaasss-ter, but he insisted.

The relationship did not last long after that.
Oldish Goat
May 7th, 2008 at 8:12 pm [Reply]

#1 — We saw Steve’s prosthestic legs about 4 months or so ago, perhaps the day he interviewed with Sam’s law firm. Per my orthopaedic surgeon spouse, they looked like up-to-date prostheses for above the knee amputations.
gnome de blog
May 7th, 2008 at 8:18 pm [Reply]

This will be the Greatest Judge Parker Ever (and that’s saying something after the pervy Paris trip – and whatever happened to Sociology Girl, anyway?) if Mama lurches out of the wheelchair onto Lady Terrorist’s back, detonating the bomb and blowing them both to…wherever. I wonder if they get 72 virgins each in Heaven?
DAS
May 7th, 2008 at 8:26 pm [Reply]

RMMD: “my lawyer said not to talk to you”? there’s gotta be a pederasty joke in their somewhere, I’m surprised ‘Mudges haven’t already been on the case like Rex Morgan on a … well, I better quite while I’m ahead

MW: is this where we find out Darth Vader is Luke’s father? Ooops, wrong “something I’ve got to tell you” moment!

PBS: always a nice palate cleanser — it’s good to read a funny comic after a few rounds of reading unfunny comics ironically before getting back to work
Vakar
May 7th, 2008 at 8:26 pm [Reply]

Okay, so Josh and all of us know by now where fabric, and why. But I didn’t know any of that three years ago. Being a stay-at-home father and hanging out with my ‘mom friends’ has won me a lot of knowledge on these matters…
Shermy Glamrocker
May 7th, 2008 at 8:33 pm [Reply]

Sure, Wal-Mart sells fabric. And polyester.

But is there a lower fabric-form than “marked-down polyester” from Wal-Mart?

Of course there is. There’s the fabric from the store that sells it.
Louie Louie
May 7th, 2008 at 8:33 pm [Reply]

#13 – Besides, “Adbul Hakim” is like being John Doe in an Muslim country.

Its apparently “Abul Hakim” so maybe its like being Jon Doe.
indichik
May 7th, 2008 at 8:38 pm [Reply]

#18, JP: I just figured vin amusant must be a French term, like vin ordinaire.
Ben
May 7th, 2008 at 8:40 pm [Reply]

#32 beat me to it. Drat. And I almost never post.

AM will be all the madder for that. It makes me a little happier. And yet… AM has won, simply… he has taken his revenge…
Diamond Joe
May 7th, 2008 at 8:58 pm [Reply]

#36 Patty Cake:

“I wanted him to be the Maaaasss-ter, but he insisted.”

You mean he w-would not a-a-PROOOVE?

I would definitely have been the Master. Much easier to get around. And besides, you get a pocket for your Mentos.
TeacherPatti
May 7th, 2008 at 8:58 pm [Reply]

#9–you rock! Did someone put padding on their knees and go as Torgo??
Poteet
May 7th, 2008 at 9:08 pm [Reply]

I have just been reminded of the existence of ZIGGY. Time for a little drink.
Buck Ripsnort
May 7th, 2008 at 9:21 pm [Reply]

Hell, just the continued existence of Ziggy in my paper makes me want to cry into my wine. O, and did you know you can buy fabric at Wal-Mart?

And I don’t want to see Steve’s stumps in JP. W/ this artist, they’ll probably end up looking like breasts.
Mars
May 7th, 2008 at 9:24 pm [Reply]

Yay, someone here knows of Phoenix Wright! I thought I was the youngest poster around this site (at 25).
Doug Puthoff
May 7th, 2008 at 9:28 pm [Reply]

5-7

FC–Alternate caption: “Let’s see, should I play Webkins, or should I get Daddy in trouble by downloading naked pictures of Dr. Laura?”

PBS–I predicted the good Cap’n would do something, but instead of hiring Boris Badenov, he did the dirty deeds by itself. I love how Pastis put a “Frank and Ernest” spin to the strip.
Ukulele Ike
May 7th, 2008 at 9:32 pm [Reply]

Diamond Joe: Please, for god’s sake, stop re-posting your posts, these things get long enough. We’ll read them in the yesterthreads as we update. At least I do. Trust me.

As for assholes in New York: I don’t drive much, so I don’t see as many as the Angelenos. I get some assholes on the subway, but I generally bury my face in a book (or the Daily News comics pages) until they move on.
Sarah
May 7th, 2008 at 9:42 pm [Reply]

29 — The JoAnns is too far away, and it’s also across the state line. Seeing as I live in New Hampshire, tax free decent fabric is okay with me. If Wal-Mart discontinued fabric, I’d be a sad panda.
Sarah
May 7th, 2008 at 9:45 pm [Reply]

Also:

49 — I’m 21. :D

Discounted polyester from Wal-mart tends to SMELL. HORRIBLY. It’s not a good idea.
Perky Bird
May 7th, 2008 at 9:47 pm [Reply]

Judge Parker–

Looks like Steve’s mom buys her hair dye at the same place as the Joker.
commodorejohn
May 7th, 2008 at 9:55 pm [Reply]

#46 TeacherPatti – Sadly, nope. Ah well, it was fun anyway =D

#49 Mars – I’m 22, and I have heard of Phoenix Wright, although I’ve never gotten around to playing either of the games.
Disloyal Fan
May 7th, 2008 at 10:08 pm [Reply]

#30 – THANK YOU! The whole male/female frog storyline is disturbing. Good to know there are others reading something besides Ye Olde Comic Classics. There’s SO much more to make fun of out there, we can afford to ignore MW and all the rest, in the earnest hope they’ll go away.
Diamond Joe
May 7th, 2008 at 10:10 pm [Reply]

#51 Ukulele Ike:

I find few enough people even read all of the current post (hence the almost-daily “Hey, why has no one here been talking about [isubject we've all been talking about]?”). Or, my favorite, if the day’s post comes at say, 8pm, someone leaving a comment at 8:03, amazed that no one’s commented yet “today.”

I do try to strike a balance. I usually cut half the comments out of the repost (although, granted, it tends to be the longer ones that stay in). If it bothers anyone else, though, I’ll stop.
mollificent
May 7th, 2008 at 10:10 pm [Reply]

commodorejohn: you’re 22? really? your authorial voice is much older. ;)
Stev0
May 7th, 2008 at 10:12 pm [Reply]

So I’m taking a wild stab in the dark here, but I’m guessing that Wal-Mart does indeed sell fabric?
sally
May 7th, 2008 at 10:13 pm [Reply]

#40 Vakar — this is a bit off topic, but since you are a stay-at-home dad, have you seen the comic “Daddy’s Home” and if you have, do you agree with me that it’s moronic? The WaPost ran it on a trial basis during part of the Doonsbury hiatus and all I could think was that it was written by a stay-at-home dad who has no “mom friends” and consequently doesn’t know how utterly banal his experience is/was.
commodorejohn
May 7th, 2008 at 10:19 pm [Reply]

#58 mollificent – Probably because I was the kind of kid whose idea of a good time was to read the encyclopedia. Which was cool and all, but it did mean I didn’t get out much for most of my life ;D
The Party Sim
May 7th, 2008 at 10:25 pm [Reply]

Bats beat me to it — all the WalMart fabric departments are closing. At least we know where the fabric went now.
The God of Jungle Patrol
May 7th, 2008 at 10:40 pm [Reply]

RMMD: Ok, now that I told you everything you need to know, get out!

9CL: Hey, weren’t there about 178 episodes of Three’s Company just like this?

FW: A better question – can he play the rusty trombone?

JP: QUICK, STEVE! THROW YOUR LEG AT HER!!!

Phantom: Yes, it’s true, if you fly out after dark in Galveston no one will notice! After all, in Texas, there are no radars, they don’t require planes to log a flight plan, and if they do spot you they haven’t heard of that device called a ‘radio’. Each airport hires an old man with a pair of binoculars to help with air traffic control.
Mars
May 7th, 2008 at 10:48 pm [Reply]

Commodore: now there are FOUR games, with a fifth coming.
ComixLovin'Cat
May 7th, 2008 at 10:49 pm [Reply]

#56 You’re quite welcome!

Unfortunately, Spot has moved toward tiresome like some of the comics classics like MW. First they were eating each other, now they’re gender switching. The potential interpretations and subtexts, hell, the storylines themselves, have been disturbing.
SecretMargo
May 7th, 2008 at 11:10 pm [Reply]

43: indichik: I thought it was just implying that the waiter was an amused douche.

57: Joe, You Crazy Diamond: I suggest linking to the original within a “value-add,” additional comment in the new thread.
Howabominable (aka Lindsey ^_^)
May 7th, 2008 at 11:26 pm [Reply]

I’m hoping that the next panel of Mary Worth will say, “Hug it out, bitch.” That will make the whole several-hundred years this horrible comic has been in publication worthwhile.
Diamond Joe
May 7th, 2008 at 11:33 pm [Reply]

I see that the contextual Google Ad space, which most often just has four two-liners about comics, is currently a full-box graphic for GoodOrient Fabrics, thanks to the whole Wal-Mart/fabric thing. So maybe those of you who want the Christian Singles girl back just need to write “Christian Singles” at every opportunity.

It also makes me wonder what weird stuff we could get there if we put our minds to it. It’s a wonder we didn’t get one for HPV tests the other day. Or free samples of MRSA.
Craig
May 7th, 2008 at 11:38 pm [Reply]

Forget fabric! Why didn’t Crock play off the much more well-known fact, that Wal-Mart sells guns to children?
http://www.pbs.org/newshour/bb/business/wal-mart/impact.html
mollificent
May 7th, 2008 at 11:45 pm [Reply]

61 commodorejohn: Oh, I hear you there. Much of my late high school career was spent in wild nights of Star Trek: TNG episodes (with an occasional break to sigh over Gerard Depardieu movies). :) Social life? Feh!

On the other hand, adolescent obsessing over reading Les Mis in the original French, (as opposed to, say, Teen Beat or Britney Spears’ autobiography) has its charms. *grin*
bats :[
May 7th, 2008 at 11:52 pm [Reply]

63. TGoJP, re JP: Yeah, Steve! That terrorist might be deadly, but you have a leg up on the competition! Kneed I say more?
Toronto
May 7th, 2008 at 11:52 pm [Reply]

Speaking of JP, does Walmart still sell wine in some places? Ie, boxes of their own brand – what was it? “Old Sam’s”?
some guy here
May 8th, 2008 at 12:15 am [Reply]

Josh, even at your worst of being a moron, you’re just about the only thing that makes Crock funny :)

Not to mention the fact that Crock is right is just sad.
Vakar
May 8th, 2008 at 12:26 am [Reply]

60 sally: Off topic? You’re talking about a comic; what could be more on-topic?

I hadn’t heard of Daddy’s Home until you brought it up, but it looks like my life in eight years. Banal? Hey, I am all about the banal right now!

By way of example: What would you call an evening in which I can put a delicious dinner on the table minutes after my wife comes home? I call it impressive. My world is (holding thumb and forefinger a quarter-inch apart) this big right now.

Moronic, though? Let me read it for a while before I judge that…
old goat
May 8th, 2008 at 12:28 am [Reply]

RMMD: Rex is interviewing a MRSA-infected patient, no gloves, no gown? No wonder the kid is throwing him out of the room.
mon-ma-tron
May 8th, 2008 at 12:33 am [Reply]

#9: MANOS! … hands of fate!!!
…cat’s on the piano, again.

Ah, Joel, how I miss you and the ‘bots.
Loramir
May 8th, 2008 at 12:35 am [Reply]

Who is this guy in Funky Winkerbean? Am I supposed to know who he is? I’ve been for a few months, since right after the jump, I believe. I can’t keep all the smirking, obnoxious characters straight. I’m really not sure why I bother.
ohyes
May 8th, 2008 at 12:38 am [Reply]

Well, when Gloria walked into Steve’s home, she found out in a hurry that Steve’s personal life may be more trouble than it’s worth.

I gotta give the Afghani woman credit for being able to trace a particular sailor in an occupying army to his home across the globe, travel to America from Afghanistan no less, obtain explosives and above all burst into English to explain it all.

She’s a worthy adversary for the amazing Steverino, but can she pick up new clients on the bus and do a week’s worth of work in a day?
Sophist, FCD
May 8th, 2008 at 12:48 am [Reply]

EMO ZIGGY IS EMO
bats :[
May 8th, 2008 at 1:06 am [Reply]

Some Thursday observations:

FC: yes, Billy, global warming is something we all should aspire to. Of course, I might expect this from Jeffy, who’s still too young to go to school. I would’ve thought a kid in second or third grade might have had some rudimentary science classes on ecology and saving the earth.
But then, you’re stupid.

FW: is Harry Dinkle DEAD? I swear that’s rictus…
Or botox.

JP: of course, suggesting that she takes the bombs off of Steve’s mom, hug them to her chest, step outside, and then detonating them would probably be lost on her.
Wacky terrorists, there’s just no reasoning with them.

MW: can’t do it…can’t read this…all I can think of is Dingo’s…

RMMD: take his balloon, Rex! That’ll teach him!

FOOB: “Brawling” O’Brian? What is this, a road show of “Guys and Dolls” or “Oklahoma,” with all sorts of cutesy names?
Then again, this does have some potential: “Whingin’” April and “Crappin’” Robin Patterson…”Droolin’” Jim…”Expanding” Elly…

Eh. That’s it. I’m tapped out.
Carly
May 8th, 2008 at 1:08 am [Reply]

I don’t know, from what we CAN see of her face, the lady terrorist looks a lot like Snape from Harry Potter.
Bobdog
May 8th, 2008 at 1:15 am [Reply]

Silly Josh — not knowing Walmart sells fabric doesn’t make you a moron, it makes you an elitist.

But this is Walmart were talking about, so it’s generally considered to be socially acceptable, if not socially redeeming, to have ignorance about their merchandise.

It is heartening to know that the good folks at Walmart give you the option of not buying clothing produced by under aged labor in East Asian nations working at ridiculously low wages — you can make you’re own for absolutely nothing! Talk about slashing prices. Of course I’m sure the fabrics are produced somehow with the aide of clubbed baby seals or some such just to make sure there’s no taint of social responsibility on any garments created with them.
Revenge of Chesnut
May 8th, 2008 at 1:17 am [Reply]

Dear Ziggy,

Alcohol is a depressant. Not that this has ever stopped me before, but I’m just saying, you might want to watch out for that.

Love,
Me
Poteet
May 8th, 2008 at 1:32 am [Reply]

# 80 bats — Because of your comment on FC, I broke my new rule about not reading FC unless it’s featured by the Pope. And having recently made a presentation to a class of second-graders whose knowledge about the natural world was impressive (they put certain state legislators to shame), I hereby declare Billy to be an even bigger dimwit than I’d realized, which is saying something.

MW — The closer they get to reconciling, the uglier Richard and Ron are getting. I dread their inevitable hug — it will probably melt their faces.
Clumpy
May 8th, 2008 at 1:32 am [Reply]

It’s my understanding that alcohol merely reduces inhibitions, so unless you have some hilarious anecdote on the tip of your tongue, amusement is hardly a necessary effect of chugging down a bottle of ‘68.

On the other hand, if your life is a vale of tears and sadness that you’d rather not dwell upon, inhibitions may be the only thing keeping yourself from a complete emotional breakdown. I think that we all agree that, in Ziggy’s case, it may be better to just have a cookie.
Poteet
May 8th, 2008 at 1:38 am [Reply]

JP — As first dates go, I’ve experienced worse.
True Fable
May 8th, 2008 at 1:39 am [Reply]

(WT)DT No sweat, Dick. Just tell him, “Why ask me? I got no taste so I’m no judge.”
FC ARRGH this pun just scratches at the blackboard of my sensibilities.
FBoFW What? Brawling O’Brien? Because Irishmen like to fight, right? Lynnie Baby, sure and you’re achin’ to be struck o’er the head with a Sheila Shelaleigh for continuing to mine the stereotyping lode.
HotC Oh NO. You mean we’ll just have to go through this whole Jonas Brothers Concert bullshit AGAIN? *groan*
Scenes from Suburban Hell Note Hi’s trippy eyes when he mentions anything to do with getting away from Hellhole Central.
JP ACTION! DRAMA! ANGRY WOMEN IN BURKAS! Goddammit, now we’re getting somewhere, Woody! Hooray!
Luann So Gunther…you’re not too bright yourself, then.
MT Mark Trail, Mr. Trail, This Guy Trail. Mighty familiar with the man, huh darlin’? Next thing you know he’ll be That Bozo Trail or Mark the Mark.
MW Nuh Uh! I was wronger than YOU!
Phantom Also known as Pilfering from Petty Cash at Bill Gates’ house. Or Abbey Spencer’s.
RM,DS Kid, that last panel makes no sense. What, are you limited to being able to tell something ONLY ONCE and then after than, you can’t utter it again? It’s bad enough that you look like Hank Venture without thinking like Dean Venture.
6Cx Is that supposed to be April Patterson? Because she’s missing some nagging parents if it is.
S-M The Vulture realizes he’s not into necrophilia after all.
Donald The Anarchist
May 8th, 2008 at 1:47 am [Reply]

Ziggy is just sad because they wouldn’t let him in the restaurant until he put on a pair of pants, thus making him break his one vow, which was to forgo pants until his genials finally descended…
Loramir
May 8th, 2008 at 2:06 am [Reply]

GF The joke is pretty lame, but I am seriously in love with the word “coolishness.” It’s such a perfect description for a number of current fads…

Marvin WHY do I read this strip? This “Ask Marvin” crap is awful, though nowhere near as bad as the horrifying spectacle that was “Belly Laffs.” But Thursday’s reminds me of these horrifying billboards that used to be around town, for weight loss or something. They had these disturbing close-up photos of a bloated, distended belly with an air valve on it, and they were awful.

Pluggers This chicken has obviously had a visit from Mary Worth…
Bobdog
May 8th, 2008 at 2:15 am [Reply]

DtM – Ha! Dennis is about to be violently murdered and have his corpse dismembered and buried under his neighbor’s house!

FC – It’s good to know which side of the Global warming debate Billy Keene is on — he’s for it.

HH – Although the Vikings were widely traveled, I think this one will get it’s stomping on from Mr. B for it’s historical inaccuracy by suggesting Vikings ever transported elephants back to their native Scandinavia.

Pluggers – Pluggers are so senile they can’t remember that they killed their spouse and turned them into soup to dispose of the evidence!

Marmaduke – Marmaduke has killed a surfer and has taken the board as a trophy.

Luann – Luann’s creator uses Gunther to voice his own misgivings about his creation, perhaps in a sort of apology to the world for the pain and suffering his has wrought upon it, but more likely it is an un-intentional revelation as to his motives — he’s still trying to get the attention of some girl who ignored him in high school.

B.C. – This “boss” new Pearl Buffer? This and the rather inexplicable device being referred to as a “Pearl Buffer” put an awkward damper on what otherwise is a reasonable attempt at actual humor. As does the whole selling of ones kids into slavery thing.
Trilobite
May 8th, 2008 at 2:19 am [Reply]

Thursday’s comics bode ill for us all:

Family Circus: I suppose we should all be thankful that Billy’s crazed yearning for worldwide ecological disaster is combined with a genuinely remarkable degree of SHEER IDIOCY. If that kid were even capable of tying his shoelaces without bumping his freakish melon-shaped head on the floor hard enough to knock himself out, we might be in trouble.

Gil Thorp: “I’m feeling pretty chipper myself”? Hey, 2-0 is the best record Milford’s had since I’ve started reading this strip…Coach Gil should be ELATED to be doing so well! Especially since those are probably the only two games they’re going to win this season.

I’m almost acclimated to the new art, although seeing yet another version of Kaz (this one apparently from the 90210 collection) is disappointing, because he and Marty Moon used to be the most iconic characters in the strip. The new model Marty is essentially the same as the old one, only he’s taking beard-grooming advice from the label on cans of Underwood Deviled Ham…but Kaz is still in limbo, and I’m hoping that the artist captures the essential beefy-dumbness-in-a-fright-wig quality of the man soon.

Mary Worth: Sometimes I think that every single Mary Worth plot can be summarized as “Everyone is wrong, and it really doesn’t matter.” Frankly, I wanted more sibling fistfights in the intensive care unit before they finally made up and their mom woke up from her coma. Way to raise QUITTERS, Mrs. Amalfi! Worse yet, ending the feud so early just means that we’ll have Mary’s beatifically grinning face staring out at us as early as next week — how horrible!
True Fable
May 8th, 2008 at 2:24 am [Reply]

# 91 Trilobite – (MW) Not to mention having her double up on the platitudes in order to accommodate both brothers. I feel a headache rising.
Cap\'n Cheetah
May 8th, 2008 at 2:40 am [Reply]

51, 58, 61 – I agree with mollificent, commodorejohn, I thought you were much older! Incidentally, I’m 22 as well, I spent much of my youth reading the medical book for fun. I think we actually have quite a few of us young whipper-snappers on this blog, if I recall correctly.
JP (not Judge Parker)
May 8th, 2008 at 2:50 am [Reply]

BTW, all the Manos talk on here is making me happy. I miss Joel and Co. as well. =( (Although Cinematic Titanic is helping fill that void in my life.)

On the off chance there are any Strangers with Candy fans out there, my first thought when I saw panel three of Wed.’s RMMD was “Those pillowy lips!”
JP (not Judge Parker)
May 8th, 2008 at 2:54 am [Reply]

Oh, 22 & 43: Thanks for trying to explain the Ziggy “pun.” In either case it definitely deserves a “ha? ha?”
Diamond Joe
May 8th, 2008 at 3:03 am [Reply]

9CL: It’s tough to feel too much sympathy for Edda when the author has just spent a week and a half making me loathe her. I know insecurity makes us do things we’re not proud of, but by stretching it out this long, McEldowney makes Edda seem spiteful and self-centered rather than vulnerable.

A3-G: “I was just drinking a bottle of ketchup. Want to join me?” The middle panel reminds me of the Peanuts where Linus bumps his head, and Lucy, not having seen it, peppers him with questions while he staggers around in pain. What I’m saying is, this strip would be immeasurably improved by a panel in which the characters are shrunk to tiny size to make room for a huge bellow of, “I BUMPED MY HEAD!” Or, I guess, “I’M ON DRUGS!”

BB: I’m finding the joke kind of inexplicable, but I’m amused by the rather small “POP!!” in the midst of that big explosion. By the way, you’d think the creators of a strip that features alcohol as much as this one would know what a champagne glass looks like.

Boffo: Heaven has to have a silver lining?

DT: Dick Tracy will throw you down a smokestack without a moment’s hesitation, but having to hurt your feelings just tears him up inside. By the way, Locher should start putting a number in the corner of the “Yuk!” “Gross!” panel, showing how many times he’s used it now. I don’t know why he re-lettered the first comment, though. I think “Really ugly!” would have been funny after that caption.

FC: I’d never have figured Billy for an old-series Doctor Who fan.

GT: So what’s the batter waiting for, the next game?

Heathcliff: Took me a minute to puzzle this one out.

H&L: Ditto is all over sashaying.

Luann: [python] “But on the other hand… I’m sorry, I can’t think of anything.” [/python]

MW: Someone tried to brand Ron as a loser, but missed.

Phantom: The minor treasure room is where he keeps his marbles, Wacky Packages stickers, and Choose Your Own Adventure books.

Popeye: All I can say is ow! ow! ow! ow! And it’s not like Olive has much padding back there.

6C: I’m inexplicably amused by the recognizably-rendered Apple Cinema Display.

S-M: Do I want to see the Vulture get action?

Tiger: Broken records? Well, you’ve got “Lamest Joke” sewn up.

Amused me: Bizarro, Close to Home, Diesel Sweeties, Fast Track, Get Fuzzy, Pearls Before Swine
Mr. O'Malley
May 8th, 2008 at 3:27 am [Reply]

29. Laura c. My wife buys fleeces, dyes them with plants she finds in the woods, spins them into thread and then weaves them into cloth.

Not for me, though. For me she buys clothes at Marshall’s.

We live in the city, so I think flax processing might be a bit too much for the neighbors.

A few threads ago there was a great adage about being pedantic, which I now wish I remember. A person from Afghanistan is an Afghan. The adjective meaning “originating in Afghanistan” is “Afghan”. The national currency of Afghanistan is the Afghani. Another name for the Pashto language is Afghani.

in recent years, the term Afghanistani (meaning of or from Afghanistan and analogous to Uzbekistani, Pakistani, or Tajikistani) has been suggested for the citizens of Afghanistan in contrast to (ethnic) Afghans who would be the Pashtuns

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demography_of_Afghanistan)

(If you want to be more pedantic than me, you could point out that the Pashto word for “Afghan” is “Afghani”.)

Pluggers: I would think that pretty much everything in a Plugger’s refrigerator would contain either cream of mushroom soup or marshmallows.

I have a “comfort food” recipe from my student days that I got from a girlfriend, who got it from her mother, who probably got it off a box of instant soup. Take some cheap beef, 1 can cream of mushroom soup and 1 envelope of instant onion soup. Cook on low for an hour, or for 15 minutes in a pressure cooker. You can add real mushrooms and onions (not part of the original recipe but makes it less salty). Good over noodles. (Well, as good over noodles as it’s going to get.)

I never had a name for this dish until I read an interview with a big food critic. He was asked if it was hard, after eating in all those famous restaurants, just to visit some friends for dinner. He replied that he really wasn’t that fussy about food—”unless it contains cream of mushroom soup”. So ever since then I’ve called it Gourmet’s Despair.

Ziggy: This could be a reference to a very famous cartoon, originally from Punch, I believe. Some people are sitting around a dinner table and the caption is “This is an inexpensive little wine, but I think you may be amused by its pretension.” But if so, the original humour has been diluted to the point of homeopathy.

88. Donald The Anarchist. Ziggy’s genials are never going to descend!

BC: I think it’s funny that clams would want to buff their pearls. Even though pearls come from oysters. (“Oyster”=someone who pretends to speak Yiddish.) And the contradiction between having talking clams (with legs!) and using clams for money is amusing. I think when this strip started people actually used ‘clams” as a slang word for “dollars”. Probably a reference to Native American shell money.
Mr. O'Malley
May 8th, 2008 at 4:34 am [Reply]

More thoughts:

Ziggy reminds me of an old Rodney Dangerfield line: “I got thrown out of a bar. They wanted to start Happy Hour.”

HotC: This is much more imaginative than waking up to find it was all a dream. I rather like the whole suspension of disbelief thing.
Alfred E. Neuman
May 8th, 2008 at 4:52 am [Reply]

#77 Loramir— The guy in FW is Harry Dinkle, former high school band director. His whole life was the band, but of course, being in a Batiuk strip, something terrible had to happen to him: he lost his hearing and was forced to retire. He is talking with Becky, his successor as band director. She was a promising concert pianist until she lost an arm in an auto accident in a car driven by Funky’s drunken younger brother Wally, who has since disappeared in Iraq, and is presumably dead.*
Hilarious, eh? That’s why we in Comics Curmudgeondom are so hard on FW. Twenty or so years ago, it was a funny strip. These days it’s just gruesome.

* I wrote this off the top of my head, so fellow ‘Mudges, feel free to give Loramir any needed corrections.
Zarquon
May 8th, 2008 at 4:54 am [Reply]

Ziggy is inspired by Thurber only Thurber is funny.
Alfred E. Neuman
May 8th, 2008 at 5:18 am [Reply]

Thursday scarf snark
FC— What’s with that “scarf”? Aren’t scarfs were female apparel items? It looks more like a muffler, and one that is big enough to mummify Marmaduke. If little Billy tried to wrap it around his non-existent neck, most of it would trail 20 feet behind him. Maybe Mommy is trying to kill him off Isadora Duncan-style. (“Billy, put on your ’scarf’ and go out and play near the street, or go ride the merry-go-round.”)
I never fail to be amazed at how such a seemingly innocuous comic can manage to be so consistently weird.
gleeb
May 8th, 2008 at 6:48 am [Reply]

Brenda Starr: For someone who hasn’t followed BS, R, this recap at Club Trendee has been pretty cool.

9CL: So, this Dr Burber is supposed to be either a vet or a professor or both, but what she really does is stand around in a field all day like a scarecrow.

Beetle: The guy who had someone else open the bottle he means to drink is complaining about a big deal being made?

Bizarro: Funny, but the caption is overkill.

Cleats: So, this has been a week of bad gags about a home-made ball return to practice soccer. But to make the gags work, there are two characters. So, there’s no need for it, because the characters could have been practicing with each other. AAAAUUUGH! I hate this comic.

Dick: Those three folks might say they don’t like Stract’s work, but they’ve been looking at it for well over a month. Day in, day out, they remain rooted to the spot.

Samira, desperate woman!: Ooh, they’re flirting with detainee-torture. Bet this is the last we hear of it, though.

Zippy: Hang on, Griffith. Did Zippy grow in in a town full of microcephalics or not? Man, you stink as a writer.
gleeb
May 8th, 2008 at 6:54 am [Reply]

Ha! I stink as a typist!
lostsynapse
May 8th, 2008 at 7:03 am [Reply]

Zits: Jeremy has a HAND fetish? That’s…convenient. In 10 years he’ll be seen in a bar desperately trying to shake the hand of a college chick.
Little Guy
May 8th, 2008 at 7:04 am [Reply]

Judge Parker: Wait until they find out Samira has an antique Nude Bomb.

FOOB: What kind of mother names her child “Brawling”? I know Elly would be one…

MT: How to steal a St. Bernard in plain sight. Hilarity ensues.
InkAllergry
May 8th, 2008 at 7:17 am [Reply]

Poor Ziggy. When will we finally see him lying in a dark, dirty alley somewhere with a needle sticking out of his arm, dead and freed from his miserable earthly existence?
Calico
May 8th, 2008 at 7:50 am [Reply]

Josh, you’re not a moron – you’re simply not a Plugger. This is good. Very good.

Speaking of turning to the bottle, I think Gen. Halftrack is almost as far gone as Ziggy.
Christ, these characters are pathetic.

JP – I didn’t know the Towlie-Ban allowed their women to wear nail polish! Fascinating indeed.
Maybe the next thing we’ll see is Madam Hajib and Steve trading Couscous and Lamb recipes.
Calico
May 8th, 2008 at 7:52 am [Reply]

And so, Ziggy careens into the depths of Absinthe Madness.
Nerowolfgal
May 8th, 2008 at 8:01 am [Reply]

Toronto says:

“Speaking of JP, does Walmart still sell wine in some places? ”

Actually in Toronto some Walmart stores have a Wine Rack mini-store in them that sells Ontario Wine, some of which has actually won awards and is pretty decent.

Mind you, Wine Rack has just been bought by an American company so who knows what they are selling now.
Little Guy
May 8th, 2008 at 8:07 am [Reply]

#28, 33, et al: “Hello. My name is Samira Hakim. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”

FOOB and FW are to the pain.
One-eyed Wolfdog
May 8th, 2008 at 8:26 am [Reply]

Gasoline Alley was funny today, yeah, I’m not afraid to say it.

Pluggers: Chicken lady, I refuse to believe that you’ve “forgotten” about butchering your husband for casserole. “Oh lawks, officer, I have no idea how that got in my freezer.” Indeed.
One-eyed Wolfdog
May 8th, 2008 at 8:30 am [Reply]

I’d wager the first draft of Shoe had a different punchline.
Mordock999
May 8th, 2008 at 8:40 am [Reply]

LUANN – 050808 – So, Gunther, you’ve FINALLY discovered that Luann is: difficult, shallow, self-centered, petty, competitive, mean, insecure, insensitive and completely indifferent to you. Those same terms apply equally to Bernice and Tiffany. Maybe its time you set your sights on either Crystal or Delta. Either that, or invest in a LOT of porn and develop a VERY active imagination….,

_____________

DEATH to TJ!
Islamorada Girl
May 8th, 2008 at 8:42 am [Reply]

I see someone has beaten me to the observation that Terrorista Girl
in JP has a lovely manicure with light pink polish. Maybe she and Gloria can bond over facials and massages later, and commiserate over how Men Are Just No Damned Good. Although I must say wiring up Granny is pretty tacky. She probably steals the floral arrangements at the Terrorist Cell Banquets, too. And buys her burkas on sale at KMart. And wears white shoes before Labor Day.
Rizbon
May 8th, 2008 at 8:55 am [Reply]

Wow, Ziggy’s server is the most tactless person ever. I can’t say I never had a guy get drunk and weep at one of my tables, but when that happened, I hid in the kitchen and hoped he wouldn’t linger all night long and then stiff me. I sure didn’t go up to the person and say, ‘Oh, no, you’re crying! Why are you crying? Is it the wine? Is it the food? Is it me?’
Calico
May 8th, 2008 at 8:57 am [Reply]

#114 – Hahahaha!
Yeah, they’ll be debating which is better – Aveeno or Body Shop lotions. Also the recent issues of Vanity Fair.
gleeb
May 8th, 2008 at 9:19 am [Reply]

105>: I think Brawling O’Brien is meant to be a boxer. It’s a nickname, like Battling Billson or Patrick “Four Alarm” Fay.
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
May 8th, 2008 at 9:30 am [Reply]

And now, it’s time for Filthy-Minded Comics!

BB: The aftermath of Panel 2 can be seen in Beetle Bailey Bukkake Boys Vol. 1, on sale now in less fine specialty shops near you.

BH: We really don’t want to hear about you and Dad having things put up your butts together, thankewverramuch. Especially not in a restaurant.

(WT)DT: Dick’s secret deformity fetish has finally come out. In panel 3, he’s been caught rubbing his groin just thinking about those paintings. Check out Liz’s look of shock and disgust.

FC: Tomorrow: “Dolly, what are all these ‘Danger’ stickers doing here?” “Global warning!”
Saturday: “Billy, what are you doing with that toad?” “Global warting!”
Sunday: “Jeffy, what are all these nightcrawlers doing here?” “Global worming!”
Monday: “Bil, what are all these half-naked women doing here?!” “Uh… global whoring?” *SLAP*

thorps. I thought Andrew Gregory had dark hair? And why is he being interviewed by the Cardinal Richlieu in panel 2? But there may be hope for Kaz… is that the tiniest hint of an ear stud I see in panel 3?

H&J: Ah, another appearance by The Town Daily News-Paper, bastion of journalistic vagueness for well over a long time now. Motto: “All the Transcribed Daily Events of Note in Your Locality that’s Fit to Print.”

JP: Look out, Samira, or Sarima, or whatever your name is! Steve knows Rum-Fu! Hiiiyaaaah!

MT: Of course you can handle a big dog! Just look at your wife! [rimshot] Thank you, thank you, I’ll be here all week!
drewbobw
May 8th, 2008 at 9:32 am [Reply]

Next on the Mary Worth Wrestling Federation- Jimmy Stewart (Vertigo) hits Jimmy Stewart (Mr. Smith goes to Washington) with a folding chair!
Tweeks_Coffee
May 8th, 2008 at 9:39 am [Reply]

#49, 51, 53, 55, 61, 68, 93 Yeah, I thought you were quite a bit older as well, commodorejohn. I’m 25 myself and thought I was about the youngest one on here. I’ve also played Phoenix Wright before on my DS. Specifically it was And Justice For All, but I got stuck (probably not even halfway through) and stopped playing.

Archie: There’s something truly horrifying going on in today’s strip. Archie’s anatomy in the first panel, particularly the normally lovingly rendered groin area, is really off. Then you follow that up with his bug-eyed expression and malformed head. Top that off with the parting shot of his dad’s teardrop shaped body and you’ve got a full load of nightmare fuel.
DT: Egads, just take them and burn them later, who gives a crap?
EC: I might find this amusing if it weren’t so damned retarded. Just get a freaking raincheck and go home!
FC: Captain Planet would like a word with you, Billy.
GT: It’s Kaz and he has earrings! All is right with the world now.
JP: Steve leaps into action with his best pseudo-karate move, but Ethnic Girl retaliates with action pose #21!
MT: Oh come on! It was bad enough when people were letting dogs out into their unfenced yards, but now Mark’s just going to let Andy roam free when he’s at a hotel!? Some wildlife expert.
Zits: Sure you didn’t see it in the back row of the porno theater, Jeremy?
Tweeks_Coffee
May 8th, 2008 at 9:44 am [Reply]

Oh, I also forgot to mention that I had to think about Heathcliff more than I’m really comfortable admitting. I was trying to work out the punchline, but I couldn’t get off the idea of it relating to an ice cream headache.
John C Fremont
May 8th, 2008 at 9:49 am [Reply]

I understand Wal-Mart’s having a big sale on flannel!

I’d always imagined our Commodore as looking like one of those guys from the Old Spice commercials from the early seventies. At age 22, Neil Young’s Powderfinger was temporarily my theme song (he says to no one in particular).

A3G – This is 3G, Alan. I think you’re allowed to just say “Margo!”

MW- Oh, no, the Red Arrow is back! It’s stalking the halls looking for them… and this time, it’s personal!

JP – “Samira, dear, your problem is clear,
Avenging your father’s death.
You seek to harm myself and my mom,
But you’re scaring me to death!”

(This works best if you imagine it sung by Phil Silvers, not Mrs. Howell.)

GT – Coach Baldwin?
Stij
May 8th, 2008 at 9:55 am [Reply]

Geez, I’m only 15. I feel young…
boojum
May 8th, 2008 at 10:04 am [Reply]

JP: I am all loving the hand action here! Rum-fu indeed. Barreto could teach a night-time Learner’s University course on Explicating Character Through Hand Jive.

And say what you will about Samira (“Racial stereotype.” “Elektra Complex.” “You’re soaking in it now!”), she’s got a good heart. Sure, she’s gagged Granny, duct-taped her to her wheelchair, and wired her with enough explosives to take out a city block or two — but at least she’s put her shawl back over her bony old shoulders. I mean, the woman’s a hundred and three! Just because she’s terrified, unable to breathe, and festering in a pool of her own feces, she shouldn’t have to catch a chill.
TheDiva
May 8th, 2008 at 10:08 am [Reply]

Luann: Once again, Gunther’s situation would be pitiable if only he were not evil incarnate.
Kaete
May 8th, 2008 at 10:13 am [Reply]

Now that they’ve put as many independent fabric stores out of business as possible, Walmart doesn’t need to really keep most of their fabric departments around.

I’m only partially kidding in this comment – when Walmart moved in they kept the department until the two local stores as well as the larger fabric store 45 minutes away were well and truly dead, and then they shut it down.
Randall
May 8th, 2008 at 10:13 am [Reply]

LuAnn: Gunther, she has a lot of negatives and a couple aof positives. eh, eh, get it boy?…I guess not.
AMSTERDANG
May 8th, 2008 at 10:16 am [Reply]

Phantom: Just started reading this strip. I’m sure it is just sloppy mechanics, but it sure sounds like this guy is trying to drive up the price of the plane he is bidding on. “Come on, folks, this plane is worth more than $4 million! It is the original, for Christ’s sake! You’d be a fool not to outbid me at this level!” To which the auctioneer has nothing to say but: “THANK YOU, SIR!”
Brad the Bold
May 8th, 2008 at 10:19 am [Reply]

>11 Diamond Joe

Wow, I caught a few seconds of that doll chasing that chick around an apartment on TV when I was a kid. Those crazy teeth and little spear stabbing her ankles!! Yikes!! It was a recurring image for years since.

I had always thought it was from “The Twilight Zone”.

Thanks for putting an accurate source on one of the monsters in my closet!
Artist formerly known as Ben
May 8th, 2008 at 10:27 am [Reply]

5/8

RMMRSA: This kid’s lawyer (forgot his name, sorry) apparently takes the Jerky Boys “Sue everybody!” approach to civil suits.

A3G: Ooh, the Margo-wingdings come out. This is heating up.

OBH: Keep grandma in. She’s a natural. She’s like Steve Shannon’s mother without the chair.

Blondie: Maybe they should do a FW-style ten year leap forward. I’m curious to see Alexander in his polygamist compound.

Marvin: Appendicitis scar envy.

S-M: Spidey’s illness is actually well timed. It seems the Vulture is only planning to visit a brothel tonight.

MW: Nooooo! They’re settling their differences on their own. How is Mary gonna get her meddle on now?
Well, maybe she can tell each brother the other one was trash talking him. That coulld keep things going for a few more weeks.

FW: So, when in doubt, use a moldy ad slogan?

GA: Ho-ho-homoeerotic!

FC: In a family this stupid, Billy needs to catch up.

6C: So did she get an email letter-bomb or what?

Shoe: Now you know that “checking accound” was not the original punchline.

Big Dog: Elsewhere, a stringy-haired but somewhat buff corpse gathers flies on the beach.

Luann: Y’know, if I didn’t know better, I’d say that Greg Evans was blown off by pretty girls in high school, and was still working ihis issues out in comic strip form.
Little Guy
May 8th, 2008 at 10:37 am [Reply]

RMHIPAA: Um, doesn’t Health Department trump Lawyer in the case of an Outbreak?
T. Chicana
May 8th, 2008 at 10:45 am [Reply]

MW: Where’s Mary? It’s like these guys just went on auto-meddle.
Mel
May 8th, 2008 at 10:51 am [Reply]

Maybe Steve and Samira can rochambeau for granny — do you think Gloria would be hanging around if she didn’t hope the bionics went all the way up?

Gloria’s already spending all the money she’ll save on D batteries.
Artist formerly known as Ben
May 8th, 2008 at 10:52 am [Reply]

#124 boojum,
When you say “Elektra complex”, do you mean that Samira wants to sleep with her late father? Or that Woody Wilson wishes he were Frank Miller? Both seem to be true.
Anonymous
May 8th, 2008 at 11:06 am [Reply]

#126 – Kaete – I’ve noticed the same thing. Of course, I don’t actually sew – I buy a few yards of fabric, stitch witch either end, and voila – instant cheap table cloth for my 6 foot folding table.

Martha Stewart, I’m not.
Sam Walton
May 8th, 2008 at 11:14 am [Reply]

In addition to bolts of fabric, Wal*Mart also sells Hippity Hop Balls.

Josh needs to have a shot and a beer and come down and shop with us great unwashed sometimes.
NotAGoatHead
May 8th, 2008 at 11:25 am [Reply]

Doesn’t Gunther get his shirts at Wal*Mart?
John C Fremont
May 8th, 2008 at 11:25 am [Reply]

Unwashed? Me? Do I have… body odor?

D’you ever notice that when people step through the doors at Wal-Mart, their speech gradually turns hillbilly-like? I swear I can feel IQ points dropping in my head the longer I’m in one of those hell holes. I hates the Wal-Mart! And the only place where you can find someone to help? The fabric department.
Mamzelle Hepzibah
May 8th, 2008 at 11:35 am [Reply]

Ziggy: My inexplicable sympathy for this head-nosed, pantsless potato of a man, even in the deepest darkness of his Sideways-inspired Weltschmerz, is potentially even sadder than Ziggy himself.
Sam Walton
May 8th, 2008 at 11:40 am [Reply]

Mary Worthless buys all her pantsuit material at Wal*Mart.

Rex Morgan buys his condoms and KY here too.

And now that we are in Canada, Elly buys all here carbohydrates here too.
Old School Allie Cat
May 8th, 2008 at 11:49 am [Reply]

That was me back @135.

Here’s the thing – I kind of like WalMart.

It’s completely out of character for me – I’m really more of a Whole Foods kind of gal, but sometimes, if I need to clear my head, I go to WalMart, get a cart and cruise the aisles.

If that makes me unwashed, so be it.

But I’m always going to need dog food, shampoo, etc. And with a new nephew arriving any day now, I find that their baby clothes are cute, and cheap enough to not feel guilty that he’s going to spit up on him.
Old School Allie Cat
May 8th, 2008 at 11:59 am [Reply]

And by spit up, I mean, “launch a slider”.
commodorejohn
May 8th, 2008 at 12:04 pm [Reply]

#122 John C Fremont – Hehe, I’m afraid not; I’m more the scrawny, gamers’-tan type. I’d post a picture, but I have no Mudge Merch to show off.

Archie – Panel two is deeply, profoundly disturbing. IT IS ALL KINDS OF HORRIBLE AT ONCE.

AS – Hmm, this is…not funny. Surprise, surprise.

Crankshaft – FUCK YOU, LEAVE THE POOR WOMAN ALONE ALREADY!

DTM – Mr. Wilson is going to murder Dennis.

DT – Oh, this just keeps getting funnier. “Tracy? Will you be my friend? Please?”

GA – God almighty, Gasoline Alley beat me to my own snark in panel three. What the hell? No, really, Scancarelli: WHAT THE HELL. Did you just make an ADULTEROUS INCEST JOKE in the newspaper? Like the kinds of pokes we make at your comic all the time? Seriously?

GT – Is that Kaz? It does look like he’s got earrings (although less noticeable than before,) but I can’t say I’m too hot on the new haircut. As comical as this one is, the old Heat Miser ‘do really had “Kaz” written all over it. Ah well, his dog-paw helps make up the difference.

HOTC – Oh, no, Tatulli. This is seriously even lamer than the “it was all a dream” ending we figured was coming. So not worth it.

JP – “Manga-style action lines!”

Luann – Congratulations to our future serial killer for offering a mildly understated description of the main character of the comic. As if we needed any further proof of just how much Luann sucks.

MT – Faux-Shirley’s left arm offers to assist in kidnapping Andy. How thoughtful!

PC – “Wasn’t very good” is a horrible understatement.

Popeye – For reasons I can’t quite explain, “I’m being pulled through a porthole!” strikes me as unspeakably dirty.

SM – So the Vulture’s evil supervillainous plan is to watch Mary-Jane’s play? Yeah, that pretty much fits right into this strip. I look forward to Venom making an appearance, where he will (horrors) purchase a new stereo setup.
Cheeky Wee Monkeys
May 8th, 2008 at 12:12 pm [Reply]

I really wish Ziggy were an angry drunk. I’d like to see him punch out the waiter. But Ziggy’s only allowed to be miserable. Boo.
Anon
May 8th, 2008 at 12:16 pm [Reply]

If you buy dog food at Wal*Mart, go out and shoot your dog now.

It will be a much less slow and painful death.
DarkStar
May 8th, 2008 at 12:22 pm [Reply]

I thought we had to fight them “over there” so we don’t have to fight them “over here.” I guess the neocons were wrong about that too.
commodorejohn
May 8th, 2008 at 12:22 pm [Reply]

On the Wal-Mart note, I feel compelled to note that the stereotype of the store being a squalorous mess inhabited by inbred yokels pretty much stems from those stores in the southern US – up here in Minnesota, there are actually some pretty decent Wal-Marts.
A New Day
May 8th, 2008 at 12:22 pm [Reply]

Poor Josh – in his rush from the brie-and-chablis tasting to the secret communist party meeting, I bet he drove right by the Wal-Mart, fabric section and all.
Gulielma
May 8th, 2008 at 12:36 pm [Reply]

FBoFW: Of course you’re scared, Mr. O’Brien. John Patterson is your dentist, you SHOULD be scared.

GF: “We Canadians like to do that old lady thing of keeping our eyes open.” Satchel Pooch, I love you!

PBS: Love how now Zebra is closing his eyes in pain at how utterly ineffectual his Croc stalkers are.

Lio: Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree!

Single But Looking: While “Doonesbury” is in reruns, the Philadelphia Inquirer is running other strips. So far, only this one. Unfunny, with all the characters having Muppet mouths to rival FOOB’s. Could we have Cow and Boy back?
Old School Allie Cat
May 8th, 2008 at 12:44 pm [Reply]

#145- Let’s be clear, I’m not buying my dog WalMart’s “Dead Horse” Brand Valu-Kibble. She gets Iams, or at the very least Purina One.

My vet is on board with this, and she’s 9 and healthy. So I don’t think I’ll resort to shooting her just yet.

But thanks for that interesting take on my statement!
Dog Lover
May 8th, 2008 at 12:49 pm [Reply]

Check out the ingredients on Iams or Purina One. Better to spend the money on your dog and by raw diet from a reputable local vendor. It will pay off in the long run.
Dog Lover
May 8th, 2008 at 12:50 pm [Reply]

And by by I mean buy.

doh.
Old School Allie Cat
May 8th, 2008 at 12:57 pm [Reply]

#151 – Dog Lover…we’ve had her on a number of different special diets due to some allergy issues – the two aforementioned brands may be glorified entrails, but she likes them, she’s doing fine, they don’t affect her allergies (which some of the “better” foods have) and the vet gave us a thumbs up.

It is what it is.
Perky Bird
May 8th, 2008 at 12:57 pm [Reply]

If the Vulture is going to see Mary Jane’s play, I wonder how the other audience members will feel about sitting next to someone who undoubtedly reeks of week-old roadkill.
smacky
May 8th, 2008 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

[Begin Catskills comedian voice]: I see Billy gets his information on global warming from the Bush administration!

[End Catskills comedian voice]
AhClem
May 8th, 2008 at 1:03 pm [Reply]

#154 Perky Bird -
Not to mention those who have the misfortune of sitting behind The Vulture, and have their view blocked by those silly wings.
AhClem
May 8th, 2008 at 1:10 pm [Reply]

As someone who’s political leanings are somewhat left of center, I usually skim over the strips that point the other way. However, I’ve found Prickly City amusing lately, particularly yesterday’s and today’s strips.

See, Tinsley? This is how it’s done with finesse and humor, and without using a 20-ton pile-driving hammer to make your point.
smacky
May 8th, 2008 at 1:10 pm [Reply]

Well, one side benefit of Trail’s plan is maybe Andy will get laid in the back of that van.

Kidnapper: “Wow, we have the famous dog of the famous Mark Tr-… what the hell is he doing to our dog? Hey! Stop that!”
El Santo
May 8th, 2008 at 1:16 pm [Reply]

You know, I feel terrible now. I’m one of those folks who knew Wal-Mart sold fabrics. Does that make me a Plugger?

(Psst… I only go there to buy cheap DVDs.)
NotAGoatHead
May 8th, 2008 at 1:16 pm [Reply]

We feed the outside strays Wal*Mart cat food. Everyone loves it: cats, crows, ‘possums, racoons, guinea hens, some old German Shepherd (the dog, not the herder)… almost sounds like Over The Hedge.
Razmytaz
May 8th, 2008 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

150 Old School AC:

Well I’m glad that your vet is healthy, but boy she must be some sort of Doogie Houser to have cleared vet school before 9.
Laura c
May 8th, 2008 at 1:18 pm [Reply]

#141 – When I first moved out West after living in NYC for 15 years, Wal Mart struck me as terribly convenient — imagine being able to buy everything in one place instead of going to the hardware store and the fruit store and the fabric store and the toy store (shopping in Brooklyn is very 19th century.) Also, being a housewife at the time it was the only place I could afford to shop. I still go there sometimes because for certain things its just the cheapest and most convenient.
Speaking of big box stores, I love Lowe’s, mainly because of the way it smells.
Lou Shumaker
May 8th, 2008 at 1:19 pm [Reply]

Josh, you’re not quite the moron you think you are (at least about fabric at Wal-Mart).

We have two stores within driving distance, one near Harrisburg and one out in rural Lebanon County. While the Harrisburg store still stocks them, the LC store recently pulled theirs (which is weird, because you’d expect more sewers to be out there than in a more urban, upscale environment).
Niall
May 8th, 2008 at 1:21 pm [Reply]

Archie: Nope, sorry AJGLU3000, your blatant second panel attempt to assert your superiority over us fleshies is denied. Maybe if you had couched it subtly in something resembling humour you might have had a chance. Please take another look at the definition of “subliminal”.

BC: I shouldn’t have, but I laughed. This is not quite subversive, but definitely not “safe family” humour. It’s only funny because they’re clams, not humans or any human substitutes. Well done, at least from this end.

BB: Let’s be very thankful the general didn’t ask him to “pop my cork”.

Blondie: I’m joining the choruses of AUUGHs that mudgeons must have cried out at this foobery of a first panel. Then in the last, either polyamory or polygamy is inferred. Somewhat timely, what with the recent arrests. Nonetheless, my big question is, when’s the last time we actually saw the kids in the strip? And when’s the last time they aged? Shouldn’t it be time they had a growth spurt again?

DtM: -100 MenacePoints this week so far, and this isn’t helping – unless Mr. Wilson makes good on his menace/promise, and this is the last Dennis strip published ever.

FC: AUUUUGH! MY BRAIN! IT HURTS!

GT: Punchout? Did they decide to mix boxing with baseball? And why is there still someone frozen after his swing at the home plate? “Oh no.. Andrew Gregory, that dick, struck me out… the shame is so great, I cannot move…” Also, Marty Moon is definitely Mirror Spock, complete with Original Series level Tricorder device. It sure isn’t resembling any portable audio recording device I ever saw. Finally.. KAZ! Pearl earrings are gone, but there’s still small studs.

HtH: Actually, no, Helga will never be able to guess; most African animals were considered myths when tales came back over the millenia to Europe; many travellers were often killed for lying to the Church on the reports of their exhibitions.

H&L: Words fail me, partly because this is not completely bone-drearily depressing for once.

MW: It says something about the gripping level of drama that I mainly look at the strip and see which arrow will be on display today. Plus, Ron has become a paper doll, complete with tabs at the head to fold back.

Phantom: OMG.. did the Ghost-Who-Bids just pwn a Mudgeon in panel 1??

Pluggers: Aren’t casseroles by definition mushroom soup with unidentifiable meat?

SlyFox: The animal revolution continues. Be afraid, humans.
Perky Bird
May 8th, 2008 at 1:22 pm [Reply]

# 156–

At least the Vulture isn’t going to a baseball game. I’d hate to imagine his disappointment when he discovers that the “hot dogs” those vendors are selling aren’t squished dogs that have been lying for a while on a Georgia highway in August.
David
May 8th, 2008 at 1:23 pm [Reply]

Regarding Ziggy, I have two possibilities. 1) A wine that amuses everyone else depresses Ziggy. 2) Ziggy is depressed, and the wine that should amuse him does not. I go with #1, and I think the waiter is trying to help Ziggy feel better and is apologizing for not being able to help. Sorry for the non-snarky answer, I spend more time over at CIDU.
smacky
May 8th, 2008 at 1:24 pm [Reply]

#163: “(which is weird, because you’d expect more sewers to be out there than in a more urban, upscale environment).”

Lou Shumaker, I had to read that twice, because I wondered what the sewer system had to do with fabric at Wal-Mart, and why you would expect more sewers in an upscale environment. Do they work at the sewer treatment plant, or is that where they go for rehab? ;-)
Laura c
May 8th, 2008 at 1:27 pm [Reply]

Coolest thing I ever bought at Wal-Mart: a Bob Dylan “Greatest Hits” cassette on the bargain rack. My 4 year old son told me his favorite song was “Yakety-Yak,” so with the aim of uplifting his musical tastes I scrounged around Wal Mart until I came upon the aforementioned tape. I played it every time we were in the car, and a few weeks later I heard him in the back seat, singing along: “She makes love JUST…LIKE… A… WOMAN!”
Dog Lover
May 8th, 2008 at 1:30 pm [Reply]

#161 Razmytaz

Um, that would be Doggy Howser.
Calico
May 8th, 2008 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

#132 – Mary is down the hall, distributing books, sniffing out death, and putting more people 6 feet under with her platitudes.
Old School Allie Cat
May 8th, 2008 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

#161 – Ah, misplaced pronouns… the bane of my existence.

The vet is a he, probably in his mid-40s, and seems healthy…

The dog is a she, 9 years old – and per my vet, is healthy.
Old School Allie Cat
May 8th, 2008 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

#169 – Or, Doggy Howlzer…
El Santo
May 8th, 2008 at 1:43 pm [Reply]

#167 — Supply and demand. The more people an area has, the more likely they are to want a bigger variety of things. Besides, I don’t think farmers nowadays have so much free time to craft their own clothes. The ones making their own clothes would be hobbyinsts and (I can speak from experience here) immigrants who are used to making clothes out of scratch. Both these types are more likely to be found in the big cities.
El Santo
May 8th, 2008 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

Whoops. Above post (#173) was actually replying to #163, Lou Shumaker.
Dog Lover
May 8th, 2008 at 2:06 pm [Reply]

OSAC I hope there are no hard feelings.

My dog just got dognapped and I am waiting for the ransom call.

Ohhhhhh, Mark Trail, where are you when I really need you?
John Steed, Professional
May 8th, 2008 at 2:09 pm [Reply]

#164 – Actually, Punchout is used regularly by baseball announcers when referring to a strikeout.

This is as opposed to a playdown, which is a non-word in the sports world
Zaq
May 8th, 2008 at 2:19 pm [Reply]

JP: Hate to tell ya, Steve, but if you voted for the Current Occupant, I could make a pretty good argument that it DOES have a lot to do with you.

Garfield: I’m going to call my cat a “meow sack” now. Though probably not “pathetic.”

Curtis: Are we supposed to feel sympathy for Curtis? His Michelle fixation proves that he’s beyond the whole girls-are-icky phase, and yet he’s thrown for such a loop by a girl who’s genuinely attracted to him? I mean, I know that’s the whole POINT, but it rings really, really false, and is just obnoxious more than anything.

A3G: You look awful, Alan! You look… exactly the same as always. Coming from anyone else, that would be an insult, but I don’t think Lu Ann quite understand the point of an “insult,” subtle or otherwise.

That’s all I’ve got today. I’ve got to pack for going home and I’ve got a sore throat on top of it. Least my finals are over. College is fun!
Old School Allie Cat
May 8th, 2008 at 2:30 pm [Reply]

#175 Doglover – no hard feelings – hope your dog gets back to you safe and sound!
Dog Lover
May 8th, 2008 at 2:33 pm [Reply]

Mark Trail and Andy are on the case.

Plus, Abby the Wonderdog is standing by, if they need her.
Vakar
May 8th, 2008 at 2:49 pm [Reply]

A3G: “Oh, you poor thing! Do you want me to run out and get some methadone? Or do you just want some smack? I’m in love with a silly ol’ junkie, yes I am!”

FC: Yeah, global warming! What, do you people like snow?

GA: It’s nice that he finally removed his cane from Kleeb’s nostril.

GF: This is composed of success. (I’m trying your Earth slang!)

GT: Kaz looks like a model in a Sears ad. He’s missing that ‘you lookin’at something?!’ quality we loved so much.

JP: Guest starring Cat-Woman as Samira! Rrrrow!

MG&G: Made me laugh! No, really!

MT: “Maybe we can!” “There’s no point in trying!” “Okay, then!” [/plotline]

RMMD: I see the plot twist! Shady lawyer guy is suing the Health Department… on behalf of MRSA itself! Those innocent bacteria are just trying to make a life for themselves like the rest of us, but someone is trying to find and slaughter them!
New CC Addict
May 8th, 2008 at 2:54 pm [Reply]

The sexy lady-terrorist in JP is such a ji-hottie.
Vakar
May 8th, 2008 at 2:55 pm [Reply]

More on FC:

“What’s my bra doing there?” “Supporting developing nations!”

“Why do you have the Rolaids jar?” “Disaster relief!”

“What are you doing with your dad’s antiperspirant?” “Operation Desert Shield!”

“Why are you writing on the globe?” “Oceana has always been at war with Eastasia!”
Perky Bird
May 8th, 2008 at 3:00 pm [Reply]

# 182 Vakar:

“Why are you urinating on the globe?”
“World pees!”

Get it? Pees, peace? *cricket chirp*
Poteet
May 8th, 2008 at 3:05 pm [Reply]

DT — After seeing that second panel at least a dozen times, I finally figured it out. We’re watching three art lovers introduce themselves, and their names are Sick, Yuk, and Gross.
Saxman
May 8th, 2008 at 3:14 pm [Reply]

Not such a moron afterall

I’m getting in this late so excuse me if I missed somebody else pointing out that Wal-Mart is in the process of dismantling fabric sections at most of their store. When this was announced back in early 2007, there was considerable outcry. There is even a petition web page to make them stop.

http://www.petitiononline.com/savefab

Here’s the scoop:

http://www.gardenandhearth.com/FrugalFamily/Walmart-Close-Fabric-Departments.htm

So maybe word just hasn’t reached the Sahara or wherever they are.

And maybe fabric sections have already been pulled from all the Wal-Mart’s near Josh…?!
Diamond Joe
May 8th, 2008 at 3:21 pm [Reply]

#97 Mr. O’Malley:

Well, fuh to that food critic! (There. I said it. I’d say it again if I had to.) It just wouldn’t be Thanksgiving or Christmas for my family without green bean casserole– canned cut green beans, cream of mushroom soup, and french-fried onions. We have, however, stopped using marshmallows on the sweet potatoes.

#114 Islamorada Girl:

You mean she wears white shoes after Labor Day, thus posing a grave threat to our way of life and proper etiquette.

-Emily Post

#121 Tweeks_Coffee:

It took me a while to get it, as I said above (#96). Then I suddenly realized the ice cream truck was in a driveway, and not on the street, and everything fell into place. See, the ice cream man didn’t make his rounds today, so Heathcliff, a regular customer, went to see what the problem was, and if it’s serious (i.e., apt to deprive him of ice cream for more days).

#129 Brad the Bold:

I always like confirmation that someone gets my more esoteric references. Trilogy of Terror was written by frequent Zone writer Richard Matheson. My sister slept with the lights on for a couple days after seeing that segment.

#164 Niall:

Mirror Spock’s recording device sort of resembles my iPod with microphone attachment, so I’ll let it slide.

#168 Laura c:

His teachers are going to love him singing “Everybody must get stoned,” too.
Long Time CCer
May 8th, 2008 at 3:23 pm [Reply]

And maybe fabric sections have already been pulled from all the Wal-Mart’s near Josh…?!

At least the wool has been pulled over his eyes.
Texas Nick USN
May 8th, 2008 at 3:31 pm [Reply]

O/T, and I should leave it alone, but I can’t…

# 69 Craig And this is a well-known fact (that Wal-Mart sells guns to children) because Sheryl Crow wrote it in a song lyric?

moving on…
# 153 Allie Cat Gizmo (our lhasa apso) also has allergies. Our vet prescribed some $22/bottle Omega-3 fish oil to spray on his food, but recently we found that Science Diet – Sensitive Skin formula has the same stuff in it. It seems to help with the allergies.
Niall
May 8th, 2008 at 3:39 pm [Reply]

186. DiamondJoe: If the current artist of Gil Thorp has actually made a reasonably accurate portrayal of a piece of modern technology (which I obviously don’t own), then all hell is about to break loose…
Josh Renaud
May 8th, 2008 at 9:54 pm [Reply]

I try to avoid going to Wal-Mart as much as possible. Not for political reasons or anything, it’s just the one near us tends to be busy all the time, with long lines, and the store itself is usually messy and disorganized.

But the one reason we do go from time to time is so my wife can buy fabric. She makes dresses for our girls. The most recent one was a dress for my oldest to wear in my brother’s wedding. Turned out pretty well!
Invisible Me
May 9th, 2008 at 12:29 pm [Reply]

There’s no Joann’s where I live, or within 1500 miles. Wal-Mart is the biggest fabric store in the country.

At least this country.
Speed of Sound Man
May 9th, 2008 at 1:13 pm [Reply]

This is among the most unabashedly depressing Ziggy strips I’ve ever seen. If plot were introduced to this feature, now would be a good time to follow the exploits of Ziggy as he attempts to take his own life, only to completely fail. That’s Ziggy!

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