The Comics Curmudgeon

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Night terror

Judge Parker, 6/15/08

Yes, because obviously this woman would have had to bring her explosives with her from Terrorist Land where she lives. Here in the terrorist-free U.S.A., we never have any reason to blow things up! We solve our disputes and demolish our buildings with pure, unfiltered Freedom.

And speaking of Freedom, thank goodness we live in country where we have a free press that’s free to not report about attempted terrorist attacks on American soil. That’s certainly not the sort of thing the public would or should be interested in, after all.

Marvin, 6/15/08

The first non-throwaway panel — in which an unshaven Jeff looks sidelong at his his sleeping wife and thinks “I never realized how devious Jenny was” — is creepy. But not as creepy as the first throwaway panel, in which we see Marvin in the same blue nighttime lighting, wide-eyed, grinning, and obviously ready to kill. The unspoken conclusion to his thought balloon in the final panel is “Feed me … with your flesh.”

Rex Morgan, M.D., 6/15/08

And thus began Rex’s never-ending quest for young Dipstick.

Get it? Because it sounds like … oh, never mind.

This entry was posted on Sunday, June 15, 2008 at 09:47 am and is filed under Judge Parker, Marvin, Rex Morgan, M.D..

65 responses to “Night terror”

xant
June 15th, 2008 at 10:00 am [Reply]

“Feed me?” Marvin is young enough to get breast-fed in the middle of the night. And Jeff is his dad. I think that out-creepies even psycho stalker Marvin from panel 1.
Harold
June 15th, 2008 at 10:06 am [Reply]

I find the general lack of acknowledgement of Father’s Day (and yesterday’s Flag Day, and tomorrow’s Bloomsday!) disturbing. Only a handful of today’s strips mention the holiday at all. Some of the others are disturbingly ambiguous, like today’s FOOB.
John C Fremont
June 15th, 2008 at 10:09 am [Reply]

# 157 (Previous thread) – Sorry, Plasma, the petty cash drawer is empty. Some guy named Alan took it to buy some generic dope.

MT – Shouldn’t there be some sort of ending here? Something like, “Their habitats are being threatened by global warming,” or something? But at least it ends in violence, with scores of dying fish about to be engulfed by a happy, happy swordfish, so there’s that.

Phantom – “UNHNFFF?” “Ha! That’s what she said!”

JP – Holy smokes! Abbey is doing her own Vagina Monologue! Again!
Paul Rodgers
June 15th, 2008 at 10:16 am [Reply]

Rex Morgan: Forever 1932.
Adam
June 15th, 2008 at 10:19 am [Reply]

Man, that Marvin is like a Creepshow episode. Thanks for bringing it to my attention.
Hawkeye
June 15th, 2008 at 10:28 am [Reply]

Judge Parker: Proving once again that no matter how modern and sexy your comic looks, it’ll never be modern and sexy-looking enough to disguise it’s completely-out-of-touch with the present-day storytelling. Especially not when somebody says “Holy smokes.”
Rusty
June 15th, 2008 at 10:29 am [Reply]

The terrorist gal smuggled the explosives into the country in wrestling mats. Synchronicity.
Ryl
June 15th, 2008 at 10:32 am [Reply]

Does anyone have a Pretentious to English dictionary so I can smack Brook McEldowney upside the head with it a few times?
Master Mahan
June 15th, 2008 at 10:33 am [Reply]

Off-panel, Sam continues: Sensitive, washboard abs, dreamy eyes, pouty lips, a tight ass, that ‘come hither smile…
Bobdog
June 15th, 2008 at 10:34 am [Reply]

Wasn’t it technically an act of personal vengeance and not terrorism? I mean yes she was one of those swarthy people from the Middle East wearing strange headgear, but don’t intentions count for anything? The fact other people felt terrified was clearly just a side effect of her primary goal, which was to kill the no-legged man who wronged her family.
Rusty
June 15th, 2008 at 10:42 am [Reply]

#8: Brooke was a contributing editor to said dictionary. If anyone posting here has a lot of contact with the academic (especially Ivy League level) world, do people really talk like this?
dimestore lipstick
June 15th, 2008 at 10:45 am [Reply]

“Handsome, talented, accomplished, war hero, single…What’s not to love?” Abbey’s sidelong glance and bemused smile reveal what she’s thinking.

“Oh, that gay, gay husband of mine–looks like he’s got another crush!”
gleeb
June 15th, 2008 at 10:48 am [Reply]

Everyone knows the real news is in the funny papers, anyway.

9CL: So, McDowner has Thorax admit that he’s a goofy windbag, but he keeps giving up big helpings of him?

Blondie: Dagwood Bumstead, behaviorist. He’s got Herb thoroughly conditioned now.

Phantom: It’s a good thing there was a haberdasher’s next door to the abduction house and not, say, a kitchen supply warehouse.
Niall
June 15th, 2008 at 10:54 am [Reply]

Niall sez:

…and that Judge Parker snark from Josh is why I keep coming back. Man alive, that was a gorgeous ripping apart. :)

(I’m in Toronto for the weekend, hence anonymous again…)
Razmytaz
June 15th, 2008 at 10:54 am [Reply]

RM(Count Morgu): I don’t know about other folk, but in my highschool, when you called someone “Dipstick”, it was usually after he did or said something particularly lame. You weren’t using his name or even nickname (unless he was habitually lame). Rex could have a lot of false trails here. Not that he’ll mind. (”I’m looking for `Dipstick’. Can I see yours?”)
Phred22
June 15th, 2008 at 11:06 am [Reply]

Perhaps it’s time to send Marvin over to Lio’s strip. A line like “Feed Me” would go real well there.
underwhelm
June 15th, 2008 at 11:06 am [Reply]

Watch out wrongdoers, Rex might uncover the whole gang. Jerkface, Numbnuts and Nincompoop had better lie low for a while.
Niall
June 15th, 2008 at 11:07 am [Reply]

Niall sez:

To Ed Power:

For the love of all that is holy, please don’t give Fox execs ideas like that!! They biologically can’t understand sarcasm, and might decide to do it.

Martha Shrewart, by the way, is so completely and absolutely perfect. :)
little red-haired girl
June 15th, 2008 at 11:09 am [Reply]

“Holy smokes!” : My dad used that exclamation. Since he has died, his four children have taken it up as an homage. Goofy things our parents did sometimes seem endearing once they are gone. Maybe that’s what happened with Abbey, or the writer of Judge Parker. Happy Father’s Day.
Red Greenback
June 15th, 2008 at 11:10 am [Reply]

RM,MRSA: Sarah must be with her real father today.

Ghost Who… Does… Um, Things: Life looks pretty sweet for the Wambesi hostages. The kids get to watch “Thunderbirds Are Go” . The other children’s mom is letting them take turns at the Etch-A-Sketch, and the fellow on the right appears to be playing Milton Bradley’s “Operation”. Unless they do the same thing every evening, which would really suck. ….nevermind.
jvwalt
June 15th, 2008 at 11:11 am [Reply]

“Holy smokes! A terrorist here! …but enough about that. Let’s talk about the love lives of bland white people!”
Niall
June 15th, 2008 at 11:14 am [Reply]

Niall Sez:

SlyFox: And just how did Sly get a sample of Carla’s DNA previously, hmmm? I guess they couldn’t print the other solution: that Sly’s refined fox nose smelled the gum and was able to recognise the scent of Carla’s saliva…

Sally Forth: Please never ever draw Ted from face-on again. He looks far too rugged and masculine that way.
Red Greenback
June 15th, 2008 at 11:31 am [Reply]

Fist-O-Justice: Rolly Church of Crete!, if that baby swordfish isn’t just the cutest darned thing! I want one!
Anonymous
June 15th, 2008 at 11:39 am [Reply]

“the second he walked in the door”? My god, that’s one cold hearted Morgan. I agree, though, that it scans better than “the moment he rolled over the threshold” or “the instant he dragged his useless legs into the room”.
Canaduck
June 15th, 2008 at 11:40 am [Reply]

Dipstick?

Um, isn’t that just a pejorative term, like “Assface” or “Jerkbag”? If the kid is actually known as “Dipstick”, I am going to be deeply troubled.
kippetje2000
June 15th, 2008 at 11:42 am [Reply]

“the second he walked in the door”? My god, that’s one cold hearted Steve. I agree, though, that it scans better than “the moment he rolled over the threshold” or “the instant he dragged his useless legs into the room”.
( I meant Steve, Damn cut and paste.)
Wanders
June 15th, 2008 at 11:43 am [Reply]

MW: The paper says Ron Amalfi was appointed to the city’s Town Council, but Mary keeps insisting he was appointed. I’m assuming Mary is correct and Santa Royale is not a democracy, but who made the appointment?
zenvelo
June 15th, 2008 at 11:43 am [Reply]

MT: it’s Fishbill- O-Justice!
Wanders
June 15th, 2008 at 11:44 am [Reply]

Dang it. I meant to say that the paper claims Ron was elected, but Mary says he was appointed. Dang. Dang. Dang! But even if I’d written my last post properly, it still wasn’t that clever, and I’m wishing I’d never started.
Tom Bombadil
June 15th, 2008 at 11:46 am [Reply]

RMMD: If it weren’t for his non-deformed fingers, our boy Jimmy could pass as a Dick Tracy villain in the center-left panel. Is his last name ‘Dalock’?
Harold
June 15th, 2008 at 11:49 am [Reply]

Sure, Red (@23), you want a baby swordfish now, but what happens when it gets too big to keep as a pet? It goes right into the sewers with all the other swordfish, to battle with the ever-growing alligator population.
Broken Skittles
June 15th, 2008 at 11:51 am [Reply]

#11 Rusty:

I go to an ivy league university, and I can confirm that there are people who talk like that. In fact, you basically can’t graduate without developing the ability to talk/write like that, because there’s no way to write a paper on or discuss Kant’s schema of the understanding or some such bullshit without being able to bullshit yourself. But only the people who think they’re smart keep up the pretentious-talk in real life.

I don’t think the black rock in the final panel is supposed to be a rock.
True Fable
June 15th, 2008 at 11:54 am [Reply]

Minor complaint: Why do comics always show a sleepy grumpy father on Father’s Day? My own dad would not have minded getting up early if he could go out and do whatever the hell he wanted to do for a whole day, and he wouldn’t have asked for a nap to waste the time during any of it. Hunting, fishing, watching the Cubs game on T.V., singing loudly and off-key if he damn well pleased, reading uninterrupted, a drink or five, playing basketball with his kids, going to stomp dances and just generally having the large time. There’s time to sleep when you die, he liked to say.

Papa Fable would have been 97. He got cheated out of 42 years of Father’s Days, and that’s a damn shame.

Oh, and on a related note, RIP Tim Russert. There’s another boy who’s going to miss his father on days like today.
Red Greenback
June 15th, 2008 at 11:55 am [Reply]

kippetje2000: Steve may be cold-hearted, but he has a special organ in his head that warms his eyes and brain 15 degrees above his surroundings. This improves his ability to catch his dinner.
Tess
June 15th, 2008 at 12:14 pm [Reply]

That rex morgan is ridiculous. My older cousin used to call me Dipstick all the time. And all we were doing was knocking over mail boxes.
John C Fremont
June 15th, 2008 at 12:21 pm [Reply]

# 34 – When I grow up, I want to be just like Red Greenback.
just me
June 15th, 2008 at 12:25 pm [Reply]

Marvin – at first glance, I caught that the ‘rents were in bed, and then I started reading from the top, with wide-eyed Marvin in the dark, in a corner. I assumed he was watching his parents practice makin’ babies.
John C Fremont
June 15th, 2008 at 12:27 pm [Reply]

JP – “The second he walked in the door, Gloria could tell he was a man of distinction, a real big spender.”
Niall
June 15th, 2008 at 12:35 pm [Reply]

33. True Fable: Edge City shows a father doing pretty much what you described there, and without remorse. It was a nice change.
Stij
June 15th, 2008 at 12:43 pm [Reply]

Heavy-lidded eyes, demands to be fed, makes annoying wisecracks…yep, there’s no doubt about it, Marvin has turned into Garfield.
Little Guy
June 15th, 2008 at 12:57 pm [Reply]

PBS: You’re trying too hard, Pastis, but it beats the FOOB Pun.

SFx: Anyone from the OJ Trial still alive to defend Carla? Or did Bb Weber get a set of CSI DVDs for Father’s Day?
Wolf Shepherd
June 15th, 2008 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

Today’s Judge Parker is wrong on so many levels that I felt compelled to redo it. I hope you agree that my version, which you can see here is at least more accurate.
Bobdog, Jungle Patrol - SVU (not an Elephant, not Spam)
June 15th, 2008 at 1:18 pm [Reply]

SFx: If the spit is not legit you must acquit!
Bobdog, Jungle Patrol - SVU (not an Elephant, not Spam)
June 15th, 2008 at 1:30 pm [Reply]

#21 – It’s just like cable news!
Wolf Shepherd
June 15th, 2008 at 1:46 pm [Reply]

#21 jvwalt – “…Let’s talk about the love lives of bland white people!”

Yeah, white people are so boring!
BigOrangeCat
June 15th, 2008 at 1:51 pm [Reply]

JP: “What’s not to love?” He’s still living with his MOTHER.
Zaq
June 15th, 2008 at 2:03 pm [Reply]

46 OrangeCat: To be fair, there’s a difference between “still living with” and “again living with (to take care of),” and given that lawyer-boy is allegedly a veteran, I think it’s a reasonable assumption that he’s moved back in to take care of his elderly, infirm mother, rather than never having left. It’s an annoyance to anyone else, yes, but not a sign of loserdom like the alternative.
Baka Gaijin
June 15th, 2008 at 2:06 pm [Reply]

#42 Wolf Shepherd: Ha ha! Your last panel is incredible!!!
The Elderly Apple Guy
June 15th, 2008 at 2:17 pm [Reply]

I particularly like the second throwaway panel in Marvin, demonstrating “Jenny and Jeff: Marvin’s Mom and Dad.” The fact that the photo is labeled as such means one of three things:

1. After Marvin was born, his parents gave up all autonomy and became content at being secondary characters in someone else’s life.
2. Tom Armstrong thinks his loyal readers are complete idiots who cannot put two and two together to figure out who these two adults living in the same house as a child are. (Sadder still, he may be right.)
3. In fact, there is no loyalty to Marvin, and so the main characters must be introduced again and again to the churning reader base.
LilJinx
June 15th, 2008 at 2:20 pm [Reply]

It also doesn’t help that Marvin is dressed like Chuckie in the first panel.
Echo
June 15th, 2008 at 2:25 pm [Reply]

Bobdog: Yeah, it was attempted murder, not terrorism. I guess anyone from the Middle East who commits any criminal act is a terrorist? Next: a 14-year old kid whose parents were from Egypt shoplifts some bubblegum. Terrorism!
Nil Zed
June 15th, 2008 at 4:01 pm [Reply]

darn it Echo, I was gonna metoo! Bobdog.

So, anyway, methree! Kidnapping attempted murderist, not terrorist!
evil_bacteria
June 15th, 2008 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

“Handsome, talented, accomplished, war hero, single – what’s not to love? In fact, I think I have a bit of a man-crush on Steve, too!”
Johnny Q
June 15th, 2008 at 5:12 pm [Reply]

Wasn’t Sheriff Roscoe on THE DUKES OF HAZZARD always calling his dim deputy Enos “Dipstick”?
Deena in OR
June 15th, 2008 at 7:32 pm [Reply]

33-True Fable:

Too true. The loss to both Luke and Big Russ is immeasurable.

Deena…still blessed enough to have both parents around…
Lisa
June 15th, 2008 at 8:23 pm [Reply]

RIP Mr. Russert. A sad loss, for his family and for us all.

comics: Is anyone else but me creeped out by the fish stuck on Sherman’s back in the Lagoon? It just sits there staring (although it talks to him about cards today). It’s sucking Sherman’s blood, right? Isn’t anyone going to, you know, DO something about it?? :o[
Smokey Stover
June 15th, 2008 at 9:33 pm [Reply]

RMMD: I like Mr. Black’s total lack of curiosity about the two strangers in the back room of his store.
Islamorada Girl
June 15th, 2008 at 9:56 pm [Reply]

While I hope Josh and The Lovely Amber have a great time in Italy
(and how could they not?) I pray he doesn’t come home with another one of those ethnic shirts he loves so much. I don’t want to see him in some off-the-shoulder Mama Mia peasant blouse he picked up in Umbria.
Nekrotzar
June 15th, 2008 at 11:07 pm [Reply]

I only just realized, reading today’s post, that Rex Morgan and Judge Parker are two different strips. I think this realization will significantly decrease my enjoyment of both of them.
Czaerana
June 16th, 2008 at 12:36 am [Reply]

Long-time reader, first time poster!
The current Mary Worth storyline great.
Bet Aldo doesn’t seem quite so bad now, eh, Mary? Jeff really is the histrionic little drama queen, isn’t he? Maybe your coven…I mean, circle of friends needs to do another intervention.
I can just see Jeff at the helm of his boat, swigging generic rum and sailing off into a raging storm…
dale
June 16th, 2008 at 1:45 am [Reply]

Rex Muddle
How would one use an old pickup truck body as a trailer?
Keep the frame rails and you have a sledge (crude sled).
Keep the wheels and add a tow bar and you have a trailer.
Just steal a truck that works, Dipshit.
Sheila Sternwell
June 16th, 2008 at 4:39 am [Reply]

#33 True – It was impossible to wake my dad up early on Father’s Day. He was of hearty Midwestern stock, which meant he was up at 5:00 AM every ding dang morning.

#40 Stij – My husband just wandered through the living room, looked over my shoulder, and said “Ugh, I hate Marvin! It’s just Garfield in baby form!” Does this mean you and my husband are sharing brains? If so, please return the smart bits of his brain back to him, he’s been without them for ever so long now.

#61 dale – I assume they meant the bed of the truck and not the body. I always just assume that the writers of the soapy strips have a bit of difficulty with nouns.
Lisa
June 16th, 2008 at 6:10 pm [Reply]

Still creeped out by the remora….
AirForbes
June 17th, 2008 at 9:27 am [Reply]

Johnny Q – totally right. My first thought was, Roscoe and Enos stole the wrestling mats?

At least this strip might get more entertaining once the General Lee shows up.
queek
June 17th, 2008 at 12:01 pm [Reply]

pickup bed, minus cab, + tow bar = trailer.

I’ve seen them before, Northern Lower and UP generally.

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