Main content:


The naked panels

Pluggers and Dennis the Menace, 2/4/13

Yup, it’s true: somethings “just happen,” no matter how much you’d like them not to! Take nudity, for instance. Some people are just “born that way,” and by “some people” we mean “literally everybody, every single person ever is born completely naked, with their genitals just out there for anyone to look at.” So filthy! So disgusting! So hard to understand. Eventually, we get old enough to understand the concept of shame — “And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked” — and we look back at our early, exposed days in horror, but we can’t blot them out with a crayon, no matter how hard we try. The Fall of Man, Dennis: that’s the most menacing thing there is.

Apartment 3-G, 2/4/13

I had a good laugh over the idea of a generic “Manhattan General Hospital,” but it turns out it’s a real thing! Or was. Was a real thing. It merged with Beth Israel Medical Center, in 1964. So I’m assuming that these nurses in their archaic caps are looking for Tommie to warn her that she’s fallen victim to some kind of space-time wormhole and she needs to be very careful not to alter the course of history based on her future knowledge, lest she cause universe-destroying paradoxes.

Mark Trail, 2/4/13

Look, Rusty, you’ve finally gotten to go on a fishing trip with Mark! Too bad it’s a “working trip,” which means you’ve got to scramble around taking pictures for Mark’s article, in violation of all child labor laws! Also, you’re probably going to be kidnapped by “Catfish”, FYI.

320 responses to “The naked panels”

  1. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:28 am [Reply]

    @Mardou Fox (#y89): Forgive me if this has been pointed out before, but I just realized who it is that John Dill reminds me of. He’s one of the Number Twos from Patrick McGoohan’s “The Prisoner”! He’s the one who drinks a lot of milk… Was in two episodes.

    He sounds like a real poo poo head.

    And speaking of poo poo heads

    http://www.gocomics.com/heathcliff/2013/02/04

    Having a cat anus pressed against the back of your head is no way to go through life, son.

  2. Chyron HR
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:30 am [Reply]

    “Cheryl, have you seen Tommie today?”

    “I thought I had, but on closer inspection it was just part of the wallpaper pattern.”

  3. Chareth Cutestory
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:32 am [Reply]

    Pluggers: Take a moment to imagine what a Pluggers universe nudist camp would look like, then take another moment to rip out your eyeballs.

  4. Scott P.
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:32 am [Reply]

    Given the population of the Pluggers universe, isn’t it likely they’re just driving by a dog park?

  5. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:33 am [Reply]

    “Naked Pluggers vs. Naked Menace — There can be only one!”

  6. Liam
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:35 am [Reply]

    JP-”Now put your arms behind your head and thrusts those breasts every night and soon you will be as big as me

    MT-”And go get yourself kidnapped in the process too.”

    MW-And some other group with a much nicer cake but you didn’t practice carrying were the ones who dropped the cake.

  7. pugfuggly
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:40 am [Reply]

    Pluggers We’ve packed the car full of TNT, left a note for the family and made our piece with god. Sometimes things just happen, you filthy heathen nudists…

    A3G Today’s strip is brought to you in TOMMIEVISION, where everyone looks like Margo Magee!

    MT “Here Rusty, go take pictures by the dock, near the water, and around Catfish’s mysterious van. Just stay away from the boathouse! Me and and my good friend Bluegill have a bit more, uh, catching up to do…”

  8. lorne
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:40 am [Reply]

    Apartment 3G is a universe-destroying paradox.

  9. lorne
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:43 am [Reply]

    Mark is smart to give Rusty a camera. Every time Rusty touches a camera, he seems to take pictures of some sort of incriminating evidence.

  10. Froggy
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:47 am [Reply]

    MW: Starting position is far more important in the Santa Royale Cake Off than it is in the Indy 500 or the Kentucky Derby.

  11. Pozzo
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:49 am [Reply]

    To give whoever took over for Hank Ketcham credit, that’s a fairly clever place to put the date. The “2-4″ almost makes one think that that album contains pictures of Dennis from the ages of 2 to 4. A normal parent would have more pictures during that age range than would fit in one album, but Dennis’ parents gave up when he stopped being naked and cute.

  12. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:52 am [Reply]

    @Chareth Cutestory (#3): Pluggers: Take a moment to imagine what a Pluggers universe nudist camp would look like, then take another moment to rip out your eyeballs.

    Well, they are all anthropomorphic animals. But still covered with fur or feathers. Mostly obese, of course. So a Pluggers universe nudist camp would look like a place filled with lots of really fat animals, like one of those zoos without visible cages. Run by keepers with really bad nutitional guidelines.

    You know, I believe I am strong enough to endure the horror.

  13. Cloudbuster
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:52 am [Reply]

    A3G: Lame excuse for why Tommie wasn’t sleeping in the apartment on New Years Eve is lame.

  14. Holly Folly
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:53 am [Reply]

    Wait, Mark Trail had brought along two identical cameras? And didn’t let Rusty have one until this point? Like, “no Rusty I need both cameras. For my journalism. You wouldn’t understand.”

    “But your not even using it.”

    “That’s the magic of journalism Rusty.”

  15. The Right Venerable Pasdordan
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:55 am [Reply]

    Kinda hard to snark when half your strips won’t load today’s episode. Stupid Houston Chronicle.

  16. Mikey
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:59 am [Reply]

    MT: And yet AGAIN, as the comments already reflect, Rusty is going to be kidnapped after taking incriminating bass planting pics. I really don’t think I want to see Elrod’s basement. He seems to have a ‘thing’ going on here…

    MW: This is what they do for fun in Santa Royale? Can’t wait for the after party! Rock on Santa Royale! Rock on!

  17. Mikey
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:59 am [Reply]

    @The Right Venerable Pasdordan (#15): The Chron is the Peter Parker of comic sites….

  18. pugfuggly
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:04 am [Reply]

    ASM After all the effort of trying to keep his identity secret, Peter has essentially turned himself into giant bumper sticker, advertizing to anyone driving along the I-95 that he’s Spiderman. Also: lazy.

    FW Hey, misery likes company so the gang’s all here!

    MW At the packed Santa Royale Convention Center, the crowd sits in rapt silence as a cake falls from the hands of competitors. Only two dickheads are rude enough to break the silence by loudly stating the obvious.

  19. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:06 am [Reply]

    Short ribs:

    Mother Goose — I guess that makes him “Archie of Grimmerdale.”

    Nancy — For the first time since 1938, “The Secret Origin of Sluggo Smith” is retold.

    Tom the Dancing Bug — Costarring “Marcus Traile, International Woodlands Detective.”

  20. un malpaso
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:07 am [Reply]

    A3G: Pretty sure Tommie’s “knowledge” is of no threat to the Universe, past or present.

    But then again… it’s always the ones you least expect, who, in their ignorance, blithely step in a puddle that goes on to create and/or kill Hitler.

  21. Little Guy
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:07 am [Reply]

    JP: Ah, Sophie Spencer, the Ariel Winter of the comics.

  22. Doctor Handsome
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:10 am [Reply]

    In a way, Dennis here is kind of a reverse Jeff Keane.

  23. Northernlurker
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:12 am [Reply]

    MT: Just how tall is Mark? Or how short is his old friend Rainbow Trout? Mark is towering over him in panel two.

  24. seismic-2
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:13 am [Reply]

    A3G: “Tommie, it’s good that you’re staying in the nurses’ quarters, because your apartment building just burned up. Oh, and your roommate Margo is here in the Intensive Care Unit, suffering from third-degree burns and severe smoke inhalation. This would be a good time for you to go wish her a Merry Christmas!!!”

    JP: Sophie! You’ve certainly… grown!

    MW: People gasp when a cake is dropped!
    Does this happen very often, at a cake-design contest? Do the sponsors grease the showroom floors with Crisco, to increase the odds of disaster and boost the TV ratings?

  25. True Fable
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:14 am [Reply]

    Peter Parker is the world’s worst superhero. Case in point: “Why bother hitchin’ a ride when my webbing will keep me truckin’ all the way to the Kingpin?” Why? – because you’re still in Peter Parker mode, you butthead! Way to advertise that you’re either (a) Spiderman’s alter ego, (b) close enough friends to Spiderman that he’ll help you stick to a truck, or (c) a criminal that Spiderman caught trying to steal from the truck so he’ll paste you to the side of it, and let the drivers work you over with a tire iron when they find you. Besides, no one else drives or even lives along highways in this country, so no one will see the world’s largest asshat clinging conspicuously to the side of a truck. No one will grab their cell phone and take a picture or video to upload on YouTube: ‘HEY hit “Like” if you hope this numbnut will fall, LOL!’ Then some guy on Reddit will say “I used to go to school with him. That’s Peter Parker, the world’s biggest dick; even his name thinks so.”

    On the plus side, at least Stan Lee didn’t try to convince us that Spiderman had a way to swing from lightpole to lightpole all the way down the road that did not involve dragging his ass through the dirt during the nadir of his swing arch.

  26. Alter Ego
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:18 am [Reply]

    love is… stealing his umbrella.

  27. The Right Venerable Pasdordan
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:18 am [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#19): And yet, seventy-five years later, nobody’s interested in Sluggo’s Secret Origin.

  28. Don A in Pennsyltucky
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:20 am [Reply]

    Mark gave Bluegill his nickname, I wonder why he dubbed the bald guy Catfish.

  29. Windier E. Megatons
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:20 am [Reply]

    So, Rusty’s been given a camera to go take pictures by the water, out where the bad guys will no doubt be breaking the rules. Does anyone else suspect Elrod just writes plots that allow him to reuse any old art he can? I eagerly await the scene where Catfish grabs Rusty’s camera and then throws money at him while running off.

  30. Doctor Handsome
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:22 am [Reply]

    “Rusty, I’m assigning you a task of vital importance: do busywork as far away from me as possible, all day and night if need be. If you’re captured or killed, I will disavow any knowledge of you. That’s how important this is.” “Wow, okay!”

  31. cheech wizard
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:28 am [Reply]

    A3G -Tommie has knowledge?

  32. seismic-2
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:29 am [Reply]

    MT: I’m still waiting to see Catfish’s shoes. Do you suppose he wears Hush Puppies?

  33. Downpuppy, Forever
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:36 am [Reply]

    There’s something innocent* about today’s Mary Worth

    Panel One, a blank wall with a speech bubble: “Gasp!”

    Panel Two narration : “People Gasp”

    *That’s a synonym for moronic, right?

  34. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:38 am [Reply]

    More short ribs:

    Broom-Hilda — Joker Fish! (Not safe for Baka Gaijin!)

    9CL — Featuring “Dong Ding (Isa)Bell and Her Magic Piano.”

    MW — No Talking Heads this go-round, but there is a Talking Sign.

  35. Perky Bird
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:38 am [Reply]

    Mark is determined to see the inside of Rod Bassey’s van. He saw the “If this van’s a-rockin’, don’t come a-knockin’” bumper sticker and just knows that whatever is causing the van to rock must somehow be the secret to Rod’s fishing prowess!

  36. pugfuggly
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:40 am [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#13):

    A3G: Lame excuse for why Tommie wasn’t sleeping in the apartment on New Years Eve is lame.

    Agreed. Although ‘drug-fueled lesbian orgy in the nurse’s quarters’ is harder to fit into the speech balloon.

  37. Dennis Jimenez
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:41 am [Reply]

    MT – I hope he enjoys his day with Penis Mightier!!!

    A3G – Beige is OK here, Tommie, but lime green is dead out….

  38. Greg
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:41 am [Reply]

    Dennis the M: “After I draw clothes on myself, I’m going to draw a penis in my mouth. I’ve always wanted to menace my younger self!”

  39. Big Bad Dave
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:43 am [Reply]

    Oh, Mark, this is my friend Will Whack You In The Face If You Ask Pesky Questions. You’d better stay clear of him

  40. gleeb
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:44 am [Reply]

    Sally: If it hadn’t been for the unemployment story, I’d say Ted was indestructible.

    3-G: There she is: Tommie, bright, cheerful, and about to be told that her home has burned to a cinder.

    ‘shaft: He’s a tax fraud, and it’s funny!

    ‘bean: OK, so the character that has never been mentioned before is now wearing some kind of Mao suit. Is she really Honey Huan? Remember, any guess is a likely as any other to be right in Batiuk’s Continuity Free Comix!

    H&J: Hi is into extremely lazy domination play.

    Sophie’s Bust: Like Momma, like daughter.

    Dick: I think for an encore, they should introduce a character called E. Metic, whose shtick is constantly vomiting.

    Thorp: Have you been sacrificing to The Peacock, Bobby?

  41. Digger
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:46 am [Reply]

    A3G: There is no danger of Tommie altering the course of history with her knowledge, as she has not paid attention to anything happening in the world over the last 50 years. However, she is worried about Communism, and this thing they call “rock & roll.”

    MT: Rusty said “wow” because he can’t believe Mark actually acknowledged his prescence on this trip.

  42. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:51 am [Reply]

    rCdS: everything is better with trebuchets.

    A&J: Arlo booty, implied.

    Lio: *Pillsbury gigglez*

    drat. The Chron is stuck on Saturday still.

    Bizarro: and you thought the FC melon heads were big!

    GT: next panel, Coach Kaz suggests a shower together to deal with the reeking.

    JP: Perky Breast Powers ACTIVATE!

    MG&G: the ALGU 3000 found a new home.

  43. Little Blue Bicycle
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:51 am [Reply]

    “Cheryl, have you seen Tommie today?”
    “Paging Dr. Kildare, paging Dr. Kildare.”
    “She should be down soon Mrs. Dawkins.”
    “Dr. Salk to the lab, Dr. Salk to the lab.”
    “Tommie’s been staying in the nurses’ quarters.”
    “Squad 51, Squad 51, house fire on Mulholland Drive.”

  44. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:52 am [Reply]

    Love Is . . .being a streetwalker’s regular.

  45. Mibbitmaker
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:59 am [Reply]

    MT: OMIGOD! Catfish and Bluegill are the SAME GUY!!! …At the SAME TIME!!! Forget *3G* tearing up the space-time continuum!
    Also — Rusty goes to take the photos, being met with “HEY! YOU CAN’T TAKE PICTURES!”, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”, and “DON’T CATCH US DOING–”, followed by an in-unison “NOTHING! …Nothing.”

    Pluggers: Some people are just born that way: judgmental.

    A3G: Uh-oh, Tommie. “We need to talk” is never good…

  46. Mibbitmaker
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:03 am [Reply]

    MT: Oop, I was wrong. Bluegill has a different shirt than Catfish, and is wearing a cap on top of his completely identical head, so they’re not the same person. My mistake….

  47. endless sky
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:07 am [Reply]

    SF: A month later and Sally is still fatigued. Pregnancy vs. menopause. Choose your side now.

  48. TheDiva
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:10 am [Reply]

    MT: Is Kelly Welly on vacation? Why is Rusty seeing all the perilous action all of a sudden?

    Pluggers know some people can’t help being the way they are…but that’s no reason not to feel morally superior to them.

  49. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:11 am [Reply]

  50. exapno
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:11 am [Reply]

    A very subtle Shoe today

    RIP Chris Cassatt

  51. Aphthakid
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:16 am [Reply]

    @Mibbitmaker (#46): That’s the twisteroo! After looking at both men dozens of times over the coming weeks, Mark Trail finally realizes they’re long lost identical twins! A quick trip to the Goodwill to obtain a hideous t-shirt allows Catfish to infiltrate the Bassy organization and discover all his secrets and where Rusty is being held since he’s likely been kidnapped by then.

  52. Mikey
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:17 am [Reply]

    MT- I would like to point out that I had a post that figured out this Rusty/Camera/Incriminating pics episode around January 15 or so. I can’t find the original post though. So by figuring out this elaborate plot earlier and not being able to find said post it basically proves that I’m as smart as Peter Parker AND just as lazy. Now I can die with a smile on face.

  53. TheDiva
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:18 am [Reply]

    9CL: A simple nod usually suffices, but that would imply that your assistant is something other than a lowly worm put on this earth for the sole purpose of fulfilling your every need before you express it.

    C’shaft: Why not? They’re both diseased vermin and nuisances to society…

    FW: Don’t worry, it’s just a retcon panic.

    MW: It’s not John and Mary’s cake, otherwise why spare us the sight of the pink apocalypse?

  54. NoahSnark
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:19 am [Reply]

    For your consideration – an entire compound filled with naked Pluggers. Brain bleach will go on sale once the screaming stops.

  55. Chareth Cutestory
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:20 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#12): You say that you believe you can endure the horror of seeing these shambling nude Plugger creatures, but can you also endure it when they inevitably start talking about whose name they saw in the Obituary section of the newspaper and trying to one-up each other on the amount of dead acquaintances? Naked, obese monsters discussing their own mortality, existentialism doesn’t get much more crushing than that.

  56. Not Just Any Dipstick
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:25 am [Reply]

    MT. The mess in the van is the cooler full of frozen fish caught over the last ??? months/years. Rusty, will be caught/chased/kidnapped in due course.

  57. Donald Saxman
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:25 am [Reply]

    MW

    As a public service for disappointed Mary Worth fans, behold:

    http://1funny.com/cake-drop/

  58. Mibbitmaker
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:25 am [Reply]

    BBlues: Ritzilla’s kid?

    9CL: Not exactly the way Bob Seger sang it…

    Glibporn: Today’s strip, like most others lately, needs to have today’s final panel of Garfield placed right after it. CC MASH-UP ARTISTS ALERT!

    Ziggy: “…..whatever it is!”

  59. Old Folkie
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:26 am [Reply]

    JP: Sophie’s breasts have enlarged at the expense of her shrunken right hand.

    9CL: After the Solange interruption, we return you to our regularly scheduled psychotic strip.

  60. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:27 am [Reply]

    Adam@Home: Is this an anti-literacy thing? Is there something wrong with a long novel? Has Basset read any Victor Hugo novels, or was he just frightened by their admittedly impressive bulk? // He’s a cartoonist, I suppose. If you can’t fit an idea into three or six panels, why bother?

    BC: Is this the beginning of the Singularity? BC has become self-aware?

    TASM: Wouldn’t the noise level make a cell phone conversation impossible?

    Bizarro: Oh, my. Piraro’s hot today. “Frosted Corn Syrup”, “Crunchy Glarp”… all my favorites. And the giant baby head! And five secret icons, all in plain sight!

    9CL: Classical musicians and dancers, attending each other’s shows. Kind of sweet, really. Like the island whose inhabitants make a precarious living by taking in each other’s laundry.

    DT: Detective Ebony? Ok, sure. I guess Chet Gould introduced her 50 years ago, and it was a daring act of social equality. She comes from a long line of Ebonys, no doubt.

    Dilbert: Search Engine Optimization?

    Fusco Bros.: Keep hoping, Duffy. Keep hoping.

    MG&G: Now Peters’s doing mashups! (And very good, too!)

    Pibgorn: No, no, McEldowney! It’s “clam down”. I thought we’d established that. (McE.: Like the Bourbons, he learns nothing, and forgets nothing.)

    Pickles: Kid. Listen to me: Tin foil.

    Love is…: Weirdly, of course!

  61. Hibbleton
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:28 am [Reply]

    A3G: This is either taking place on a porn set or at a sexual fantasy camp. No nurse has dressed that way since Julia went off the air in 1971.

  62. Dood
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:30 am [Reply]

    Judge Parker: OK, OK, we get it. The perk is strong with this one.

  63. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:31 am [Reply]

    @Chareth Cutestory (#55): You say that you believe you can endure the horror of seeing these shambling nude Plugger creatures, but can you also endure it when they inevitably start talking…

    Well that’s different, isn’t it? You were talking eyeballs before!

    // …to the pain!

  64. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:32 am [Reply]

    @TheDiva (#53): Re: 9CL

    The capper is how evidently turned on Amos is by this behavior. As long as all the straight men in the Brookiverse are bookish nerds who are turned on by being emotionally and physically abused by women, things will work out fine!

  65. bunivasal
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:35 am [Reply]

    There’s something inscrutable about the way Mark says “I hope you have a good day, old friend.”

    The picture shows him shaking hands, but wouldn’t it make more sense if he whispered this while looking at his friend through a sniper’s scope?

  66. Hibbleton
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:36 am [Reply]

    JP: It must be extremely painful for a JP artist to draw a young girl. Must. Not. Make. Tits. Too. Big.

    @pugfuggly (#18):
    Actually, they’re the only two people watching the thing. But you’re right, they probably are dickheads.

  67. Voshkod
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:36 am [Reply]

    I suspect that today’s Pluggers actually featured a gay bar or a mosque before the editor quickly penciled in a fence while cursing the reactionary so-and-so that draws this abomination.

  68. btown
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:37 am [Reply]

    MW: There’s no need to gasp: They’re just demonstrating the beauty of nature. It’s like watching lava flow in Hawaii, or glaciers calve in Alaska. Nature is more than just jumbles of pink flowers and Mary Worth figurines, you know!

  69. Mibbitmaker
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:48 am [Reply]

    FW:
    And now, another episode of “Darrin Fairgood: Audience Surrogate”!

  70. Liam
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:55 am [Reply]

    MW-Sadly one of those people can’t make the gasp sound they actually have to say the word gasp.

  71. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:56 am [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#19): Yah, Marcus Traille had a thin moustache.
    Next Episode: Marcus punches himself.

  72. NonnyMus
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:00 am [Reply]

    Yep. Mark Trail nor Rusty are apparently immune from all forms of PTSD. Sadly, it also makes them unable to learn from their experiences and makes Mark strangely careless of Rusty’s safety.

  73. Jason1981
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:00 am [Reply]

    MT: Mark’s plan to be rid of Rusty will fail once the kidnappers decide to throw him back.

    S-M: Meanwhile, on the same highway :
    “So, what’s the boss got for us, today?”

    “We need to head to San Francisco to stop Spider-Man from getting his butt kicked and making a fool out of himself”

    “Good thing you’re an angel, ’cause THAT’s gonna take a miracle..”

  74. sporknpork
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:01 am [Reply]

    You’re a plugger if you use a license plate cover to avoid outstanding warrants.

  75. NonnyMus
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:02 am [Reply]

    Tommie has always worked for Manhattan General and will always work for Manhattan General. Always.

    Also, right about now, Nurse Dawkins is writing her 10,000th official reprimand of Tommie for forgetting her regulation nurse’s cap… and wearing color.

  76. Mibbitmaker
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:03 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#60): re: Adam @ Home: I don’t think so. I’m sure it’s just a reference to the “impressive bulk” (I haven’t seen or read any Victor Hugo, myself), and meant as a literary reference (so, not anti-literacy). Basset could’ve just as easily substituted War & Peace…. or Cerebus the Aardvark (“Church & State” alone….)…. or “Inna Gadda Da Vida” (Cerebus and the Iron Butterfly song are in my cultural realm, but I admit it can be a long slog to get through them for many).

  77. sporknpork
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:04 am [Reply]

    @Chareth Cutestory (#3): My god, Henrietta’s cloaca… *hurl*

  78. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:09 am [Reply]

    DtM: Dennis scrawls over the historical record so that he can change details that embarrass him. Who knew this was the young George Lucas story?

    A3G: “First my apartment gets bombed out and now you’re breaking up with me?”

    MT: “Why Rusty, I just thought of a new opportunity for you to get yourself kidnapped and/or nearly killed. What do you say?”
    “I’m in!”

    MW: Moy and Giella treat the cake dropping the same way Garry Trudeau handles awkward meetings in the West Wing.

    9CL: The page-turner would probably be a trained musician himself, familiar enough with the piece so that he would know when his services are needed. I’m guessing Isabel’s is a masochist. Funny how much of that seems to go around.

    Archie: He can’t feel his feet, but it will take another half hour or so for the numbness to reach the important parts.

    JP: Sophie leans back to show off her Spencer Family Resemblances. Yeah, I’m just gonna back away here.

    GA: Ah, immigration court. The time-honored way of finding a wife on short notice.

    HtH: Chris Browne does his bit to promote this summer’s big 3D blockbuster, “Vikings vs Lemmings.”

    Phantom: There’s no “in the Bandar tongue” note, but I guess defenestration is the universal language.

    Shoe: This is news. Sincere condolences, Mr. Brookins.

    Momma: “I boned a lot of bellboys and tennis pros the first time, too.”

    SFx: “No you degenerate, ‘a doobie’ is not a viable answer.”

  79. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:10 am [Reply]

    The Amazingly Bad Spiderman: MJ sits at home in lingerie, sexily stroking her hair. “Hitchhiking to ‘Frisco… to catch a bad guy… Ok… Be safe!” The camera pans back to reveal Kingpin in bed, smoking a cigarette. “Who was that?”

    “My husband says needs an ass kicking in SF. If you take your jet now, you’d still beat him there by 6 hours.”

  80. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:13 am [Reply]

    JP: Piglet and a giraffe? She’s in high school, right?

  81. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:14 am [Reply]

    MW: Witness the beauty of nature! This work is called “Gravity”.

  82. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:15 am [Reply]

    @gleeb (#40):

    Sophie’s Bust: Like Momma, like daughter.

    Which was, of course, intended as a more “feel good” sequel to “Sophie’s Choice.” Protests shut down production before more than a few minutes of footage could be filmed.

  83. Illustrator Steve
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:16 am [Reply]

    MT – Standing on the dock after being left behind by Mark, a sinister smile appears on Rusty’s face as he stares at Mark’s camera and recalls the pawn shop they passed at the entrance of the Centerville fishing camp.

  84. Illustrator Steve
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:18 am [Reply]

    MT – “Heck!”, Rusty thinks to himself, “This dumb old camera ought to be worth at least THREE old arrow heads at that pawn shop across the road!”

  85. AhClem
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:19 am [Reply]

    JP – Since Sophie is Abbey’s adopted daughter, genetics aren’t a factor in her sudden “development.” Abbey must have financed the operation to enla … er, no. I’m not going there.

    Double-squick if it was Sam’s idea.

  86. Cloudbuster
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:19 am [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#18): “ASM After all the effort of trying to keep his identity secret, Peter has essentially turned himself into giant bumper sticker, advertizing to anyone driving along the I-95 that he’s Spiderman. Also: lazy.

    Yup, it’s simply incomprehensible that there were not about 5,710,000 Facebook posts of phone snapshots of the guy hanging on the back of a semi in a big web hammock.

    // 5,710,000 is what I got when I Googled spiderman semi web hammock.

  87. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:22 am [Reply]

    Badass of the day award: Toss up between
    Phantom, tossing a dude out a window with one hand. Wordless, too. Clean. Oooh, BADASS!

    And –

    Hagar, who causes an army to leap to their own death rather than tangle with this filthy barbarian who hasn’t washed since the time of Charlemagne. Badass, or just B.O.?

  88. Illustrator Steve
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:23 am [Reply]

    MT – “Hey, KID! WHERE do you think you are going with that camera?!”
    “It’s okay, Mister Catfish, I am going across the road to pawn this thing so I can get some more arrow heads!”
    “Here, kid, let me give you a ride over there in nice nice big van with privacy glass and lots of cool things inside of it!”
    “Ummm, I doooon’t know….”
    “….I’ll give you an arrow head!”
    “Okay!!!!”

  89. AhClem
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:24 am [Reply]

    SM – If you’ve ever had the “pleasure” of riding in a station wagon with the back window rolled down, you know that exhaust gases from the vehicle get sucked in due to the lower pressure in the vehicle’s wake. Riding on the back of a truck like that would inevitable lead to asphyxiation or, at the very least, brain damage.

    If Spider Man does this a lot, it would explain an awful lot of what happens in this strip.

  90. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:25 am [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#34):

    MW — No Talking Heads this go-round, but there is a Talking Sign.

    I don’t know if there are any Talking Heads on the premises, but John may say to himself “My God what have I done!”

  91. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:26 am [Reply]

    @Illustrator Steve (#84): If Rusty pawns the camera for … how about … a fishing pole, maybe he can claim to have gone fishing with Mark, as they are physically present on the same lake.

  92. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:34 am [Reply]

    A3G: “Tommie, your roommate is in room 1026 with injuries from smoke inhalation!”

    “Oh my gosh! I thought you were about to fire me!”

    “You are fired, for sleeping on the job, but I thought maybe you’d want to check on your roommate. When she comes to, you can tell her you’re going to be a bit late with the rent.”

  93. Evan
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:35 am [Reply]

    I’m going to go way out on a limb and suggest that Rusty’s going to end up photographing something that Rod Bassy (I can hardly even type that name) doesn’t want seen.

    Who wants to bet?

  94. pugfuggly
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:45 am [Reply]

    @Hibbleton (#66):

    Actually, they’re the only two people watching the thing. But you’re right, they probably are dickheads.

    Didn’t you see the huge crowd depicted last week? Unless maybe it was just two people and 998 mannequins, and the whole thing is just a huge practical joke on aspiring cake decorating.

    @Cloudbuster (#86):

    Yup, it’s simply incomprehensible that there were not about 5,710,000 Facebook posts of phone snapshots of the guy hanging on the back of a semi in a big web hammock.

    Do cell phone cameras even exist in the Spidey-verse? I know Petey still drags around a clunky kodak on the job. Then again, he can’t seem to afford a bus ticket on his own, so maybe an iPhone is out of his reach…

  95. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:45 am [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#13): My first assumption was that there had been a time jump and Tommie was sleeping at the hospital because of the fire. They probably are trying to pull something cheesy, though.

  96. Dood
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:53 am [Reply]

    Apartment 3-G: “Tommie’s been staying in the nurses’ quarters.” “Thank goodness! Last week, she killed three patients. If our mortality rate continues to grow like that, we’ll have to merge with Beth Israel.”

  97. Kristian
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:55 am [Reply]

  98. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:58 am [Reply]

    Hazel — I’d love to know why cartoonist Ted Key drew both Harold and Seymour with pronounced breasts* in Monday’s comic. Unfortunately, Key
    died in 2008, so I guess we’ll never know.

    http://www.jsonline.com/comics/32402404.html?feature_id=Hazel&feature_date=2013-02-04

    *It’s “moobs” if you’re a man, “boobs” if you’re a boy.

  99. Will
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:58 am [Reply]

    JP: Isn’t Sophie supposed to be 12 or thereabouts? Thanks for making me feel like a pervert.

    Foob/Luann: Same gag, 30 years apart.

  100. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:59 am [Reply]

    @Mibbitmaker (#76): I haven’t seen or read any Victor Hugo, myself…

    I must say, I was a little nonplussed by that statement. I can understand not having read… but that you have never even seen a copy of Les Miserables or Hunchback of Notre Dame? Odd. — Well, I think you might like him.

    But then I had never heard of Cerebus the A.. Had to gogle it. 6000 pages? “Cerebus phonebooks”? I think even Victor Hugo would have been impressed. (Hugo was an excellent visual artist, too, though he kept that rather private.)

  101. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:00 pm [Reply]

    @Will (#99): Which is exactly how I felt after seeing today’s Hazel!

  102. La Cieca
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:01 pm [Reply]

    MW: I don’t think that I can take it, ’cause it took so long to bake it and they’ll never have that recipe again.

  103. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:03 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#100): Now why didn’t Chrome spell-check (by Google) catch “gogle”? That is odd, too.

  104. BwaHaHa
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:06 pm [Reply]

    It’s generally understood that using future knowledge while time travelling will alter the universe, but existence can only be destroyed via paradox, IE the future you meeting the past you.

    This makes Tommie unique; she’s the only inherently safe time traveller in all human history and fiction. Because not even Tommie has any interest in meeting Tommie; she is the Anti-Solipsist.

  105. Jerry Fox, from Cleveland
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:10 pm [Reply]

    Judge Parker: There’s a little too much creepy pedo vibe in a lot of the comments today. Isn’t Sophie supposed to be only about 13?

    Mark Trail. If this were a strip that realized there was a latter half to the 20th Century, I’d think the big reveal was that Catfish and his “friend and partner” Rod were a couple.

  106. Marc
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:15 pm [Reply]

    A3G- When did Nurse Ratched start working at Manhattan General?

  107. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:16 pm [Reply]

    @Will (#99):

    Sophie aged ~3 years between story arcs. (somewhere between outsourcing her homework and deciding to make the cheerleading squad by reading about it.)

  108. Legend of the Arctic
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:17 pm [Reply]

    How boring would a sentence have to be in order to not get an exclamation point from Mark Trail?

    “Hey, Rusty, I’m going to fill out my form 1040! I hope I claim the correct number of deductions! While I’m doing that, you can take a picture of some dock!”

    “Wow, okay!”

  109. Poteet
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:18 pm [Reply]

    MW — I’ve been told that cake-decorating contests wherein one sees the cakes being decorated are now standard on cable cooking shows, which I don’t get. So I’d really like to know whether being able to carry the cake is part of these contests. I can understand that being able to carry one’s stunning pink creation might be a necessary part of running a baking business, but if someone in a wheelchair, say, wanted to enter the Santa Royale cake-decorating competition, it would seem rather harsh to say “Tough cheese, we allow able-bodied cake-carriers only.”

    My gentle wish for a dramatic fatal heart attack for John Dill, striking him down at the moment he may be about to achieve his dream, still stands. Maybe it has happened already! How exciting.

  110. Marc
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:21 pm [Reply]

    A3G & Mark Trail- I have to say that I’m both extremely curious and a little bit terrified at what these two strips would look like if they ever got writers/artists who were not stuck in the 1950′s.

    Funky- The retconned, illegitimate daughter looks suspiciously like a young version of Crankshaft’s daughter.

    Cranky- Speaking of, what I wouldn’t give to see the IRS come busting and drag him off to jail for being a tax cheat.

    Luann- Yeah, Bwad is such a great guy because you’re such a neglectful mother…errr.. aunt, that you refuse to take the kid to pick up what is essentially a school supply.

    Mary Worth- So I take it that nobody knows how to draw a cake being dropped.

  111. seismic-2
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:22 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#80): JP: Piglet and a giraffe? She’s in high school, right?
    No, it has been well established that Sophie is a cheerleader in Junior High. Yeah, I’m getting sort of uncomfortable looking at this strip, too.

    GA: Rufus is carrying a heart-shaped box of candy to City Hall? So this means the “Rufus and Melba courtship” story arc finally begins, some 40 or so years after they first met in this strip! This romance will come as an enormous source of satisfaction for all 5 people, worldwide, who have been asking for it.

    MW: “Gasp!” “They almost made it!” This crowd is way too polite. What’s tomorrow’s strip – “Oh I say, old chum, bad luck! I hope things turn out better for you, next time!” What is this, croquet? No, it’s big-time cake designing! You’ve got to expect the throng that’s packed into the Santa Royale coliseum to be more than a bit rowdy, and they likely heckle the contestants and jeer at them. “Hey Dill – get off the stage! You carry a cake like a retired hotel manager!”

  112. Poteet
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:26 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#100): Perhaps the intended meaning was that Mibbitmaker has not seen any film or stage adaptation of Hugo’s work, as well as not having read the books. That is true of me and WAR AND PEACE. I understand the book is about war and peace and is very long, though not as long as a storyline in JP.

  113. pugfuggly
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:28 pm [Reply]

    @BwaHaHa (#104):

    This makes Tommie unique; she’s the only inherently safe time traveller in all human history and fiction. Because not even Tommie has any interest in meeting Tommie; she is the Anti-Solipsist.

    Even if she was interested in meeting her past self, she probably wouldn’t be able to recognize herself any better than anyone else can.

    That’s why there’s no mirrors in Apartment 3G: Tommie is confused by them, Lu Ann starts pecking at them, and Margo doesn’t have a reflection anyhow.

  114. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:33 pm [Reply]

    Sick Chicks — I believe Bannerman calls it “shoeing the pooch”…

    http://www.jsonline.com/comics/32402404.html?feature_id=6Chix&feature_date=2013-02-04

  115. seismic-2
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:33 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#100): Yes, Cerebus the Aardvark started out with the explicitly stated objective of telling a comic-book story that would run to exactly 300 issues, and as time went on each story arc was collected into a “phone book”. Producing over 6000 pages of an illustrated story is indeed an impressive achievement, especially when you realize than only 5990 of them were an expression of deeply felt misogyny.

  116. Marc
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:37 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#111): As long as nobody yells out “Hit him with your pickle, Dill!” Because nobody wants to see that.

  117. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:42 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#115): Well, minced oath! Sound like John Norman’s epic Gor series — with pictures!

    I shall have to check my local public library!

  118. Charterstoned
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:44 pm [Reply]

    MT – As Mark, Rod Bassy, and Bluegill head out, Rusty and Catfish settle in for an exciting afternoon on the dock. Rusty learns that he and Catfish are the same age, but that Catfish just has alopecia. Wow! Catfish learns that he and Rusty are the same weight, because the weigh-in fish scales work on mutant kids, too. Neat!

  119. Amos Snarkadder
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

    MW – “People gasp when a cake is dropped.”
    That reads like a statement of fact. Well, yes, I suppose people do. And I expect that people shriek when a cake is thrown from the stage. Especially if it’s in their direction.

    A3G – These nurses seem like a cheerful group. Even in the face of tragedy and shocking news they all have smiles. “Hey, Tommie, your apartment and all your possessions were destroyed in a fire, your roommate is in the burn unit, and your neighbor had a heart attack. Bwahaha!”

  120. Beetle Bumstead
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

    MT“Wow! Okay! I heard Catfish and Rod Bassy say they would meet down at the glory hole. Do you want some pictures of that, too?”

  121. Amos Snarkadder
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:49 pm [Reply]

    Luann – This won’t end well. I hope.

  122. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:50 pm [Reply]

    @Kristian (#97): Nobody miss Marcus Traille, y’all.

    Fans of “Tom the Dancing Bug” (both of you!) should definitely take a look-see.

    Speaking of bugs, today is actor Bug Hall’s 28th birthday. (You know where Bug Hall is located, right? It stands right next to Toad Hall!)

  123. MySpoonIsTooBig
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:53 pm [Reply]

    Pluggers- It is my understanding (by way of the David Sedaris essay about visiting a nudist camp) that most nudists are very much Plugger-types themselves. Just… Naked. So yes, not the kind of person one would ever want to see naked.

    Rhymes With Orange- always a pleasent surprise when a comic strip actually makes me laugh out loud.

  124. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:55 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#111): What?? My old high school used to attract country music legends to the varsity cheerleader tryouts all the time, of course. But JV? Ha! Never! They’d be stuck with one-hit-wonders or geezer-rockers trying to pull a comeback tour. This strip doesn’t make a shred of sense.

    I did notice that Abby, tasked with a hard evening of drinking expensive wine and listening to her husband, didn’t bother to attend Sophie’s performance.

  125. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:56 pm [Reply]

    @MySpoonIsTooBig (#123): Aren’t naked pluggers normally called “furries”?

  126. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:57 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#112): I have tried to read War and Peace many times, and I may try again. I’m told that Richard Pevear and Larissa Volokhonsky’s new translation is excellent, and I just finished their translation of The Brothers Karamozov. I had read the book before, years ago, in another translation. Guess what? It really very lively and sometimes even funny in P&V’s version.

    The trouble with W&P, when I previously tried to read it, is Pierre Bezukhov. He’s just an annoying dimwit. I end up skipping ahead to the “war” parts, which are really very good.

  127. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 12:59 pm [Reply]

    @Mibbitmaker (#46): Catfish is Doc/Pop, but no one recognizes him because he’s wearing a disguise. It’s not as concealing as Superman’s Clark Kent disguise, but it’ll do.

  128. Amos Snarkadder
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:05 pm [Reply]

    FC – So you’re saying we don’t have to laugh. We’re okay with that.

  129. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:08 pm [Reply]

    FW: Hi, I’m Fred’s illegit daughter who has come to screw you out of any pitiful inheritance he may have left…. oh SHIT! He’s not croaked yet? Well, .. can I at least get an advance?

  130. cheech wizard
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:09 pm [Reply]

    JP – So Sophie doesn’t eat with her mom and dad? Doesn’t get any of the best fettuccine alfredo Abby ever made? What do they do, set out a bowl of dog food for her on the floor?

  131. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:10 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#100): Seconded on Victor Hugo. I bought a copy of The Hunchback of Notre Dame a couple of summers ago and found it a brisk, entertaining read. Hugo strikes me as a pessimistic Dickens with more sex. Vive la France.

  132. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:12 pm [Reply]

    @Jerry Fox, from Cleveland (#105):

    There’s a little too much creepy pedo vibe in a lot of the comments today. Isn’t Sophie supposed to be only about 13?

    You know who else seems to have forgotten that? Mike Manley.

  133. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:13 pm [Reply]

    A3G: You’re fired, Tommie. You too, Cheryl. Unbuttoning your top button? We’re not running a brothel here! When men see the two of you the only thing they want to know is “Does that neck go ALL the way down?” And Tommie, the only colors permitted are white and light pink. Most of us play it safe by alternating from one panel to the next.

  134. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:14 pm [Reply]

    @Legend of the Arctic (#108): dock. dock.

    otherwise, it would be weird. . . .

  135. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:16 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#131): Hugo strikes me as a pessimistic Dickens with more sex.

    Well put.

  136. Stroker Ace
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:21 pm [Reply]

    DtM – Along with the bedwetting, pyromania and cruelty to small animals this ‘putting clothes on’ is another step on Dennis’ path to Dahmerville.

  137. Poteet
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:22 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#131): I read HUNCHBACK when I was about fourteen and SPOILER ALERT the ending bummed me out sooooo much. But at least I learned never to trust handsome French captains. Or evil archdeacons.

  138. MySpoonIsTooBig
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:26 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#125):

    The question then, is thus- is there a small subset of Pluggers who get their rocks off pretending to be human?

  139. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#19): The funny one to me was “Phil Collins”. In the 80s, I had a friend who looked very much like Phil Collins. Maybe too tall, but sitting down negated that difference. He had an English accent to add to that, also. We were both in a larger group in a crowded Burger King and we had to sit at separate tables. So my table decided to go up and loudly ask for autographs. People from other tables pointed and whispered, but they didn’t bite. If he had been wearing nicer clothes, and if it were a nicer restaurant, we might have started a chain reaction.

    I had a friend in the 90s that looked like Phil Collins, too, but he was an American, and he didn’t act or dress like a star, and the real Phil Collins wasn’t quite at the top of the charts during the 90s like he was in the 80s.

    Anyway, there are Phil Collins dopplegangers that walk amongst us.

  140. Calico
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:30 pm [Reply]

    Is Catfish going to use the old matchbook-in-the-scale trick on Bassy’s competitors? Considering they use digital grocery store type scales, of course.

  141. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

    DtM: What’s the big deal, ma? Don’t tell me you didn’t back those up on your hard drive.

  142. Poteet
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

    FW — Sorry, kid, you’ve just been Batiuked. Be grateful it’s merely deep longstanding betrayal by your parents and not cancer. Yet.

  143. Government Cheese
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

    MW: I’m sensing the cake drop is a low-rent version of “Clash of the Titans”. Mary, in all her pride, has offended the gods, and instead of releasing the Kraken on Santa Royale, they give Dill uncontrollable gas, which causes him to drop the cake. Beware the sin of pride Mary! Moooh hoo hahhahaha (cough snort).

  144. Calico
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

    @Hogenmogen (#139):
    There certainly are, and we are lucky to be friends with this wonderful man, his lovely wife (who is his manager), and the rest of the band. Super people in all respects.
    http://martinlevac.com/
    Right now he is doing his jazz interpretations of Genesis songs-I’ve seen his DOAV and DITL shows numerous times, but not this one. He was also in The Musical Box for a time.

  145. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:39 pm [Reply]

    SM: The thought of hiding on top of the truck so you can at least see where you’re going didn’t occur to the webslinger. So, the truck takes an exit going north. At a gas station outside Portland, Parker wakes up with a gun in his face and a very pissed off truck driver on the other side.

  146. Calico
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:39 pm [Reply]

    @Government Cheese (#143):
    I’m actually betting that some other team dropped their cake. James Joyce and Mother Nature will win the competition.

  147. Liam
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:41 pm [Reply]

    A3G-Tommie, there is a crazy man here who says that in the year 2001 two skyscrapers that have yet to be built will be destroyed when planes are crashed into them. We know that you have no psychiatric training whatsoever and figure that you will be the best person to talk to him.

  148. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:43 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#137): But at least I learned never to trust handsome French captains. Or evil archdeacons.

    I have no doubt but those lessons have served you well over the years.

  149. Government Cheese
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

    @Calico (#146): You are probably right. One can only hope that one will smite Mary due to all her smugness. Or maybe Dill played dirty and greased up the floor for the other contestants.

  150. Hogenmogen
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:49 pm [Reply]

    A3G: Tommie, we have to talk. The manager of the gift shop told me that you paid for a purchase with a dollar bill dated 1975.

  151. A Smirch Unheeded, Deacon
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:54 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#148): I’ve always wanted to be an archdeacon, but whenever I put in for promotion, they always bring up my one superpower, the ability to predict the endings of Anthony Trollope novels. It’s not my fault I can only use it for evil.

    // The ending of Marion Fay (1882) [*] — Heh,heh. Evil. I warned you!

  152. Shrug, Shooting a Bit of the Old Bumber
    February 4th, 2013 at 1:56 pm [Reply]

    @Alter Ego (#26):

    The rain it raineth on the just
    And also on the unjust fella
    But more upon the just, because
    The unjust hath the just’s umbrella.

  153. Hart of Johnny
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:00 pm [Reply]

  154. Mikey
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:00 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#142): If we explored this further I’m sure we would find out that she learned this truth from one (or both) of her adopted parents on their deathbed(s)…..dying of cancer. Or hey! Maybe a stroke! Wouldn’t that be ironic.

  155. Poteet
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:03 pm [Reply]

  156. Shrug, Trying to Get a Fix on Tommie-Level Medical Training
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:04 pm [Reply]

    @Little Blue Bicycle (#43):

    “Pain and the knife are inseparable, Dr. Bolton.”

    “This ‘germ theory’ of yours is nonsense, Fracastoro.”

    “Ugha hold still — me bash demons out of head with rock.”

  157. Calico
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:06 pm [Reply]

    @Government Cheese (#149):
    This is the weirdest story, but I have to tell it now. I have had some ESP incidents in my life, and this is one of them.
    A couple of years ago my gf and I went via CAA truck and a car tow to Canadian Tire for a switch prob. We went across the road to a chicken/ribs resto called Scores.
    A group of Junior hockey players came in w/their coach and chaperone, and when big coach got up to get hot soup from the salad bar, one of the kids spiked the floor with a pat of butter.
    My gf was at the salad bar too but came back seconds before the coach returned along the same path. I said to my friend “look out, you might be hit by hot soup.” The coach slipped a bit but had a nice rebound except for noodles and broth all over the floor, and it missed us by an inch. He was pretty pissed off, as was I – guy could have been paralyzed. “That’s not fuckin’ funny.”
    Either that is ESP or logic, or both.
    Now Batuik can use this for his next story arc.

  158. Liam
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:08 pm [Reply]

    MT-”Old? I’m two years younger than you, Mark.”

    MT 2-Any day that Mark gets to spend with a rod and away from Rusty is a good day.

  159. Shrug, Trying to Get a Fix on Tommie-Level Medical Training
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:11 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#60):

    “DT: Detective Ebony? Ok, sure. I guess Chet Gould introduced her 50 years ago, and it was a daring act of social equality. She comes from a long line of Ebonys, no doubt. ”

    I assumed The Spirit’s kid assistant had grown up and had sexual reassignment surgery.

  160. Government Cheese
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:13 pm [Reply]

    @Calico (#157): That is interesting. However, if Mary were to fall, I would not feel bad. Does that make me a bad person?

  161. bats :[
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:16 pm [Reply]

  162. Shrug, Doing the Dozens
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:19 pm [Reply]

    @Will (#99):

    “JP: Isn’t Sophie supposed to be 12 or thereabouts? Thanks for making me feel like a pervert.”

    *Each breast* is 12, so Sophie-as-an-entity is presumably 24, and street legal.

    /// No, I’m not counting and adding ages for her feet or hands or brain or anything; this is JUDGE PARKER, who cares about those bits?

  163. Joshua
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:20 pm [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#18): Peter Parker is in either California or Nevada, far from I-95. I-95 runs along the East Coast between Maine and Florida.

  164. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:20 pm [Reply]

  165. Hibbleton
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:22 pm [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#94):
    I typically don’t count soulless zombies, i.e., Charterstonians as people but you may have me on a technicality.

  166. CanuckDownSouth
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:24 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#109): Yes, but the the reason carrying the cake is part of it is because these are architectural design challenges of edible confections. A typical one will have precooked cake slabs at the ready, a known theme (or a surprise with a short design consultation time) and 8 or 12 hours of assembly, including complicated fondant, chocolate, or poured sugar candy sculptures in the decor. There may be a minimum height or animatronic requirement. They’re usually assembled in multiple bits and have to be sturdy enough to be moved to a judging table. It can actually be tricky.

    TV contests involving baking are usually of the cupcake variety, where the short time (= difficulty cooling the darn things) can destroy attempts at decoration – melted icing has knocked out many a competitor. There also was a Top Chef: Desserts season a while ago; I don’t know how much of that was about artistic decoration versus taste.

    And yes, I watch waayyyy too many cooking competition shows. Oddly enough, I find them great when on the treadmill.

  167. Shrug, Reading "GA" But Thinking "GAHHHH"
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:25 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#111):

    “GA: Rufus is carrying a heart-shaped box of candy to City Hall? So this means the “Rufus and Melba courtship” story arc finally begins, some 40 or so years after they first met in this strip!”

    Well, that means Melba must be beyond child-bearing age now, so at least the worst has been averted.

    // Will Rufus take her out to a formal dinner and offer Melba a toast?

  168. Naked Bunny with a Whip
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:30 pm [Reply]

    Also, you’re probably going to be kidnapped by “Catfish”, FYI.

    Rusty will finally get to hang out with people who genuinely like him and take him fishing!

  169. Uncle Lumpy
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:38 pm [Reply]

    @Naked Bunny with a Whip (#168):

    … people who genuinely like him and take him fishing!

    HAHAHAHAHA!

  170. Shrug Shrugovitch
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:45 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#126):

    “I end up skipping ahead to the “war” parts, which are really very good.”

    Wait, I’ve never read WAR AND PEACE, but — skipping “ahead” to the war parts? If you can do that, shouldn’t it have been named PEACE AND WAR? (Or maybe PEACE AND WAR AND PEACE ?)

    //Truth in packaging and all that.

    ///// I’m also reading this new two-volume edition of Faulkner’s ABSALOM, ABSALOM! I’m almost done with v.1, ABSALOM, and am looking forward to v.2, ABSALOM!

    //////No one will be seated during the concluding exclamation mark!

  171. Shrug, Son of Pavlov
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:48 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#137):

    “You played in something called the THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME — gee, why does that sound so familiar?”

    “Well, does the name “Quasimodo” ring a bell?”

    //// Does the name “Rhett Butler” wrong a belle?

  172. Droopy Says
    February 4th, 2013 at 2:56 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug, Son of Pavlov (#171): Should I chime in by mentioning Esmeralda?

  173. Anachrosaurus
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:02 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#109): “MW — I’ve been told that cake-decorating contests wherein one sees the cakes being decorated are now standard on cable cooking shows, which I don’t get. So I’d really like to know whether being able to carry the cake is part of these contests.”

    I think this is the Santa Royale Festivus Cake-off. The Feats of Strength are all-important.

  174. Liam
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:09 pm [Reply]

    MW-”Oh my god! That person’s arm just fell off.” “And that’s why you always practice carrying cakes.”

  175. Majicou
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:10 pm [Reply]

    Frank Bolle spent three seconds considering–”Nurses still wear those folded-napkin hats, right? Eh, sure.” Of course, Mr. Bolle hasn’t seen a nurse in decades–he gets all the medical care he needs from his daily glass of mercury.

    Man, all the King Features comics on Darkgate are stuck on Saturday. I don’t know wh–wait. Groundhog Day… oh, my God.

  176. Anachrosaurus
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:13 pm [Reply]

    @Anachrosaurus (#173):
    Frank Costanza surveys the pink-spattered studio in mute terror, Barber’s “Adagio for Strings” sobbing in his mind’s ear…

  177. The Silent Penultimate Panel
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:14 pm [Reply]

    A Pluggers nudist park? I’m pretty sure I saw one of those in the real world. It’s called every animal anywhere ever. Get over yourself, dog-with-clothes-on.

  178. Liam
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:18 pm [Reply]

    JP-Sophie, now lick your lips.

  179. pugfuggly
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:23 pm [Reply]

    @Joshua (#163):

    I extend to you my sincerest Canadian apologies. Josh had mentioned the I-95 in an earlier post, and I just assumed that was the one they’d be on.

  180. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:26 pm [Reply]

    @Hart of Johnny (#153): I love that sick little throwaway line at the end.

  181. Freakin Hemingwad
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:27 pm [Reply]

    Is there a logical explanation for Chris Cassatt’s signature being on a strip commemorating his death? Talk about zombie strips…

    Meanwhile, in Phantom, the world’s luckiest man just got thrown through a plate-glass window without a scratch on him. I wonder how Walker would feel if he accidentally killed or maimed someone with his fisticuffs. It would probably be a turn-on to Savarna, though.

  182. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:30 pm [Reply]

    Mandrake — Even Jack Elrod thinks the writer/artist of Mandrake is getting carried away with his ridiculous character names:

    http://www.jsonline.com/comics/32402404.html?feature_id=Mandrake&feature_date=2013-02-04

    Although “Jockamo” and “Slotterhouse” don’t sound any worse to my ear than “Catfish” and “Rod Bassy.” (Says the man who calls himself “Rocky Stoneaxe”!)

  183. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:40 pm [Reply]

    @Liam (#174): ”Oh my god! That person’s arm just fell off.”

    I think you looked at Monday’s Knight Life by mistake:

    http://www.gocomics.com/theknightlife

  184. Alfred E. Neuman
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:43 pm [Reply]

    JP— Sophie finishes the last bit of code for the beta version of a sexually oriented new video game where all of the action is controlled by infrared tit rays. The working title is Knock ‘er Up. Although she will make millions from the game, Sam and Abbey will be disappointed in her because she has had to do actual work in order to make the money.

  185. Ratiocinator
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:44 pm [Reply]

    ASM: “And why am I waiting until now to tell you I’m going to San Francisco? Why didn’t I call you many hours earlier while I was trying to hitch a ride in that direction, or call you from the car I caught a ride in before I fell asleep in it? Those are excellent questions, MJ! That’s why I married you, you know, because you think of such great questions like that! Yup, nobody asks better questions than you do, you unparalleled question-asker you! Wellgottagoloveyabye!”

    FW: “Okay…I guess everyone knows what’s going on here except me.”

    Here’s what’s going on, Darrin: twenty or thirty odd years ago, your father had sex with somebody who may or may not have been your mother, conceiving Kerry here. She was born, and then she proceeded to age, bringing her to the physical state she currently finds herself in. She evidently heard her father had a stroke, and now she’s here to either help care for him or to strike him down while he’s vulnerable, depending on whether she likes him or not.

    That’s what’s going on. If you want to know why nobody told you she existed, that’s a different question entirely, although it may have something to do with the fact that the Funkyverse is inhabited largely by dicks.

    Garfield: Think about what you’re wishing for, Jon. He interacts with you all the time, but often that interaction takes the form of grievous bodily harm. You should really be thankful any time he chooses to just lie in one spot and do nothing.

    JP: Abbey is stealing Sophie’s pig! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SOMEBODY STOP HER BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE!

    Luann: Shannon speaks for all of us when she demands that the two of you not get mushy, Toni & Brad. Regardless of whether or not anybody still uses the word “mushy” in that context, which I’m fairly sure nobody does.

  186. Shrug, Also Known as Shrug
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:44 pm [Reply]

    Josh notes that both PLUGGERS and DENNIS THE MENACE today happen to have nudism themes . . . and in my dead tree paper this morning, I was amused to see two different strips both doing “guy crawling through the desert dying of thirst” jokes and two other different strips both doing “death personified as the Grim Reaper” jokes.

    I suspect the number of possible jokes usuable by the comic creators continues to shrink as readers find new ways to be offended by anything slightly goring of their own pet oxen, so that we’ll see more and more of this until at last the entire comic page is reduced to golf jokes.

    /// Dear Sir/Madam: I was shocked and appalled to see only twenty-nine of the thirty strips in yesterday’s papers doing golf jokes. Why can’t we make it thirty out of thirty? Think of the children! (Also, please cancel my subscription.)

  187. pugfuggly
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:44 pm [Reply]

    @Hibbleton (#165):

    I typically don’t count soulless zombies, i.e., Charterstonians as people but you may have me on a technicality

    ‘Anyone who would voluntarily be part of an audience for a cake baking/decorating competition can’t really call themselves a part of the human race.’ ~Albert Camus

  188. Alison
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:45 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#60):
    Re “Adam”: Yes, there is something wrong with that book. What’s wrong with it is that is not full of stupid pointless jokes that involve everyone going off the original topic and smirking at each other. Such a thing will not be tolerated in the world of “Adam @ Home”.

    “Mary Worth”: Well of course it’s not Mr. Dill’s cake that was dropped, but I have to say I dig this idea of showing nothing but a building, and captioning what’s going on inside. It’s so lazy, it’s genius. The last Dawn storyline would have been way more amusing if all we’d seen was a big hospital every day, and captions like, “At Santa Royale Hospital, Dawn meets a man who has only one arm” and “During lunch, the one-armed man tells Dawn she looks just like his dead sister”.

    “Baby Blues”: Wanda, you such a push-over. If your kid wants to bring home a child known for consistently smashing up other peoples’ property, it is okay to say NO. Hell, maybe the kid would learn to stop that kind of behavior if someone actually put their foot down.

  189. Horace Broon
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:46 pm [Reply]

    A3G: Tommie hasn’t been staying at Apt 3G, and literally no-one noticed, including the place she was staying instead.

    FW: Okay, my current theory is that Kerry is not some bastard offspring Fred never spoke about, but the legitimate child of the Fairgoods who was sent to live with relatives somewhere because they couldn’t look after two kids, and obviously the progeny of Not-Yet-Dead St Lisa took precedence.

    RMMD: Coincidentally, “ginger and honey” is also the kind of herbal tea Rex prescribes for cancer.

  190. Liam
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:50 pm [Reply]

    Ziggy-”We have one of those too except ours wears pants.”

  191. Liam
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:52 pm [Reply]

    A3G-”We are tired of getting phone calls asking why you aren’t writing any songs.”

  192. Chip Whittle
    February 4th, 2013 at 3:52 pm [Reply]

    @Ratiocinator (#185):

    That’s what’s going on. If you want to know why nobody told you she existed, that’s a different question entirely, although it may have something to do with the fact that the Funkyverse is inhabited largely by dicks.

    The reason is even more wonderfully Batiukian than you could imagine. Somebody on rec. arts.comics.strips found that at Tom Batiuk’s horrible, horrible and completely wrong blog (I’m not joking here; go see it, because he gets writing a blog wrong) from March 14, 2012 this statement, which you’ll have to locate by control-F finding because Batiuk doesn’t know how blogs work:

    I’ve also been getting a lot of questions about Fred and Ann and their position in the Funky firmament, so here’s a little trip in the wayback machine to bring new readers up to speed. Fred Fairgood appeared in the strip from day one as the counselor at Westview High. Ann joined the faculty as teacher a few years into the saga. When the faculty went on strike, Fred and Ann were partnered on the picket line, and, as a result, got to know each other a lot better. So much better in fact that they became engaged and were later married even though Fred neglected to get a marriage license. It all worked out when the Eliminator hacked the courthouse records and obtained a license for them. The wedding reception, of course was at Montoni’s. Still later, they adopted the baby that Lisa gave up for adoption in high school and who is now their son, Darin. As I mentioned in the intro to Volume One of The Complete Funky Winkerbean, in going over the early strips, I found that Fred had actually been married before, and so some serious retconning is currently under way.

    Go on. Try to mock this development in Funky Winkerbean more thoroughly than Tom Batiuk pre-mocked it ten months ago. He’s bested us all, for the horrible interpretation of besting that counts as “best” in Winkerville.

  193. tallyHO
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:02 pm [Reply]

    @CanuckDownSouth (#166):

    There may be a minimum height or animatronic requirement.
    Whaaaat?
    Are you saying there are cuckoo cakes?

    That, I gotta see!

  194. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:05 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug, Trying to Get a Fix on Tommie-Level Medical Training (#159):

    I assumed The Spirit’s kid assistant had grown up and had sexual reassignment surgery.

    I always wondered if the person who came up with the term ebonics (ebony + phonics) was a fan of the Will Eisner character. Because Ebony White did, in fact, talk “that” way.

    By the way, are you familiar with Oliver and Ellery Queen’s black half-sister, the archer/detective known as Ebony Queen?

  195. Mikey
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:16 pm [Reply]

    So I Googled “Catfish nickname meanings” to try to figure this out. At a site called “BabyNamer” I got this:
    Meaning: Its source is an English expression meaning “Catfish.”
    Narrative: It is an American nickname given in honor of the popular gamefish, usually to those thought to share some of its attributes.
    These attributes are a bundle of contradictions, including delicious meat and a formidable array of stinging whiskers

    So he should at least have stinging whiskers but he has no facial hair at all. It just makes no sense in the Trailverse.

  196. Peanut Gallery
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:17 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#60):

    Pickles: Kid. Listen to me: Tin foil.

    We can’t see what that helmet is lined with. Maybe he’s taking the advice Frank Lee Meidere posted here a while back.

  197. bbofun
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:20 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#134): GOOSE! *runs away*

    MW- Is this the old fake-out? Is it not John and Mary who have dropped their cake, but one of the other younger, fitter, presumably more talented, teams? Or is it just that the artist is incapable of actually drawing the action, and opted for this method of depicting the scene? Odds are about 50/50, honestly.

    @Chip Whittle (#192): That is amazing- and, combined with the odd flashback of “since the coach kidnapped my daughter…just kidding” on Sunday, suggests that Fred was divorced by his first wife, who married the coach. I assume they eventually moved away from Cancerville. Why young bastard-boy was never told about this is, as has been already stated, because his parents (like most of Funkytown) are dicks.

  198. bbofun
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:21 pm [Reply]

    @Mikey (#195): Obviously he has delicious meat, duh! Just ask Rod Bassey!

  199. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:25 pm [Reply]

    Shoe — Oh, if only I could get the image of Cosmo crapping on Chris Cassatt’s obituary out of my head.

    Because birds use newspaper to defecate on. And it’s probably a reflection on Roz’s cooking that the Perfesser finds it neccessary to keep his “toilet paper” close at hand.

  200. CanuckDownSouth
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:27 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#193): Yup. I saw one which had to have a Rube Goldberg-esque element as part of a Suessian theme.

  201. bbofun
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:33 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug, Trying to Get a Fix on Tommie-Level Medical Training (#159): [COMIC NERD GLASSES ON] Actually, DC Comics, as part of a line of comics they called “First Wave”, which used pulp and pulp-style heroes in a post WWII (or a conflict that seems to have been similar- it’s never specified) time period, “re-booted” The Spirit- and his “Ebony” was female (and not quite as young as the original).

    For those interested, the other characters in the “First Wave” (which was in a seperate universe than the normal DC Comics) included Doc Savage and his operatives, The Avenger (from Justice, Inc.), Rima, the Jungle Girl, the Blackhawks, Batman (who was just starting out his career), and Black Canary. it was an interesting concept, but wasn’t terribly popular. Collections (aka “graphic novels”) of the various series and specials are available.

  202. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:39 pm [Reply]

    Pibgorn: You know what, Mr. McE? This latest twist really pisses me off. The big point of the story of Scheherazade is that she was a smart, clever, and brave woman, who risked her own life nightly for nearly three years in order to protect others.

    To reduce her to a seductress who got her way by being sexy is bad enough; to claim that her brilliance and courage was due to a genie feeding her lines is freakin’ insulting.

    Who’s next for your retcons, Mr. McE? Rosa Parks?

  203. commodorejohn
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:41 pm [Reply]

    @gleeb (#40): OK, so the character that has never been mentioned before is now wearing some kind of Mao suit. Is she really Honey Huan?

    Tired of bucking for a Pulitzer on his own dubious merits, Batiuk has decided to just start importing Trudeau’s characters into Funky Winkerbean wholesale. Look for Zonker to show up sometime this spring, only to be thrown in jail for marijuana possession and die of AIDS!

  204. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:45 pm [Reply]

    @bbofun (#201): “Ebony” was female (and not quite as young as the original).

    Teen actor Bumper Robinson played a male Eubie (Ebony) in the 1987 Spirit television movie.

  205. Inkwell
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:47 pm [Reply]

    Looking at today’s Mark Trail brings up an interesting question: what colors are Mark and Rusty’s hair? I assumed black with blue highlights was supposed to look like black hair. But Rusty has red highlights. Is he a redhead? Does that mean Mark really has blue hair?

    Has this artist ever seen a redhead and noticed that their hair is not constantly shrouded in darkness?

  206. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:51 pm [Reply]

    @Chip Whittle (#192): That’s the weirdest “blog” format I’ve ever seen, yes. Judging by the “blogs” (plural) in the URL, I half suspect that he’s one of those folks who calls each individual post on a blog a “blog” (as in that was a great blog you wrote the other day).

    You’d think someone in charge of a “serious” comic strip, following the lives of multiple characters over many years and rather complicated events, would have a character bio for each of them by now, wouldn’t you? Or at least hire a minion to go through the old strips on your behalf?

  207. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    February 4th, 2013 at 4:54 pm [Reply]

    @Chip Whittle (#192): Oh, man. I just read the paragraph that follows the part you quoted. It begins “This will all be so much easier when everyone has Volumes two and three in their hands and can just read all of this for themselves”

    Dude. “My job will be so much easier when I can stop bothering to keep track of my own characters’ life histories and let my readers do it for me. Oh, and buy my books!”

  208. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:12 pm [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#206): The sad part is, none of us would have ever realized/remembered that Fred F. is a divorcee.

  209. A Smirch Unheeded, Deacon
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:29 pm [Reply]

  210. Chip Whittle
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:30 pm [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#206): Yeah, the format is just so…so…

    Let’s face it. Tom Batiuk’s blog is the Tom Batiuk of blogs.

  211. Ratiocinator
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:31 pm [Reply]

    @True Fable (#25): Your brain thinks the same way as my brain.

    Not that I’m getting all “How dare you steal my snark, THIS WILL NOT STAND!” or anything; I’ve written comments about strips in the past and posted them only to then look at the previous comments and see that somebody else pointed out the same exact thing before me.

    Such is the curse of us ‘Mudgeons. *sigh* (It’s okay if I do that, I hope, sighing maiden still sighing?)

  212. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:31 pm [Reply]

  213. tallyHO
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:41 pm [Reply]

    @Mikey (#195):

    For a split second, it dawned on me that maybe Elrod had caught onto the irony thing.
    Naming a character “Catfish” who doesn’t have whiskers or looks like his namesake.

    However, maybe it relates to how he helps Rod Bassy cheat. I’m still thinking there is scuba gear in the van and Catfish puts a trophy bass on the hook for Bassy.

    //oh gawsh. it is getting ridiculous just trying to write about this strip.

  214. Ratiocinator
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:42 pm [Reply]

    @Chip Whittle (#192):

    Go on. Try to mock this development in Funky Winkerbean more thoroughly than Tom Batiuk pre-mocked it ten months ago.

    I’m not up to the challenge. I cannot mock this better than TomBat and his non-links-to-individual-posts-having failblog has.

  215. Ratiocinator
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:44 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#193):

    Are you saying there are cuckoo cakes?

    There are and, as with Cocoa Puffs, I am cuckoo for them.

  216. Ratiocinator
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:50 pm [Reply]

    @Holly Folly (#14): COTW nominee!

  217. Majicou
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:50 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#117): The thing is that Dave Sim doesn’t even have your sort of garden-variety misogyny; he has this sort of batshit-insane mythology thing going in which he posits that men are the bright, creative force of the universe and women are only a dark, destructive void. Look him up if you ever feel like being ashamed to be male.

  218. Alfred E. Neuman
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:56 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug, Also Known as Shrug (#186) said: “Josh notes that both PLUGGERS and DENNIS THE MENACE today happen to have nudism themes . . . and in my dead tree paper this morning, I was amused to see two different strips both doing ‘guy crawling through the desert dying of thirst’ jokes and two other different strips both doing ‘death personified as the Grim Reaper’ jokes.”

    To those we can add today’s Garfield and Get Fuzzy strips (back-to-back in my dead tree paper) doing “cats don’t care” jokes.

  219. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:58 pm [Reply]

    @Holly Folly (#14):

    Wait, Mark Trail had brought along two identical cameras? And didn’t let Rusty have one until this point? Like, “no Rusty I need both cameras. For my journalism. You wouldn’t understand.”

    “But your not even using it.”

    I think I can explain. You see, the second camera is already loaded with film. So when Mark is taking pictures of some exciting fish catching action, and runs out of film in his first camera, instead of having to drop the film roll out of the camera, and reload it, lining up the leading edge of the new film onto the take up reel, and carefully getting it started, he can just grab the second camera, set it to the exact same f-stop and speed as the first, and be back in business!

    // Wait. What?

  220. Ratiocinator
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:58 pm [Reply]

    I missed 9CL today, so belatedly:

    9CL: Haha, it’s funny because she is physically assaulting him without cause, likely to the point where he will need brain surgery to survive!

  221. The good ship thetis
    February 4th, 2013 at 5:59 pm [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#179):
    There is a US 95 in Nevada, not the same as I-95. It goes north from LV to Reno and might be a plausible route to San Fran.
    Josh actually mentioned 1-15, which goes to either LA or Salt Lake City.
    I would have posted about that on the earlier day, but I thought, who really cares?

  222. seismic-2
    February 4th, 2013 at 6:24 pm [Reply]

    GT: OK, the whole Peacock Power concept is now proven to be a fraud. Jaybird can go back to being dead now.

    Luann:Does Brad just hang around the fire station even when he is off duty? Well, I suppose when TJ is your roommate, it does seem like the preferable alternative.

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#199): Shoe — Oh, if only I could get the image of Cosmo crapping on Chris Cassatt’s obituary out of my head.

    Actually, Cosmo wrote Cassatt’s obituary. Since the Treetops Tattler seems to have three employees – an editor, a columnist, and a delivery loon – it was pretty much inevitable who would get the assignment.

  223. Mikey
    February 4th, 2013 at 6:30 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#213): Hmmmm…you may be correct, but good irony is tough with recyled art, so that would mean Elrod is less lazy then Peter Parker, which is clearly not the case. There will be scuba diving, and Rusty stumbling, but I’m also hoping for a camoflaged catfish wet suit now. Thanks for amping my expextations. Hell, at this point maybe that’s what a Nature Themed cake should look like, a giant Catfish-Man hooking a frozen bass onto a Rod Bassy Killer. Perhaps the cheap paint on the lure can be a carcinogen and thus it may become the most popular lure in Westview….

  224. bats :[
    February 4th, 2013 at 6:33 pm [Reply]

    @The good ship thetis (#221): there are at least three legal brothels on that stretch of road, too. That might make a good story!

  225. tallyHO
    February 4th, 2013 at 6:41 pm [Reply]

    @Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol (#208):

    Fred Flintstone got a divorce?!?

    I bet that Barney Rubble was somehow involved in the reason why. He was a real Lothario, don’tcha know. And that sports car he drove! What the–?

  226. Sgt. Stoned
    February 4th, 2013 at 6:44 pm [Reply]

    MW: John Dill’s problem with premature ejaculation manifests itself in a number of ways.

  227. tallyHO
    February 4th, 2013 at 6:46 pm [Reply]

    @Mikey (#223):

    Oh, I could have ramped up your expectations to 11.

    The impetus to say that Bassy’s pal Catfish was a Mighty Morphing Little Buddy was an impulse from which I needed to walk away.

    I would so totally want Catfish to drink some magic, Dr. Jeckell-like formula and after his body went through a few contortions, voila! A giant, Charlie Brown lookin’ Catfish!

    He’d jump in the waters and seek out the fattest, plumpest bass available (while occasionally throwing out some “Good Grief”s and some “Aaaargh”s).

    Eventually a dog fish would save his bacon by finding the perfect Bass and…and
    …what? Too much?

  228. tallyHO
    February 4th, 2013 at 6:49 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug, Son of Pavlov (#171):
    Does the name “Rhett Butler” wrong a belle?
    If Rhett Butler is wrongable, then nothing is right.

  229. Dale
    February 4th, 2013 at 6:51 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#219):

    Mark Trail cameras

    You just described the reason for carrying two guns. It’s NOT so you can shoot with both hands at the same time.

  230. tallyHO
    February 4th, 2013 at 6:52 pm [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#204):

    whew. I almost forgot this was here, waiting for me to reply to it.

    ahem.

    So, there is a character named “Ebony White” and for a version of said black character they decided to go waaay out there and change the character around, making the character’s new name: “Eubie White”?

    Who’s bright idea was that? Was it Eisner’s?

    Who be responsible? Eubie?

    //wtf?

  231. tallyHO
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:05 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#230):

    //in all seriousness, I don’t know a thing about “The Spirit” or the characters. I’ve read the name for the supporting character prior to this but it just made no sense to me then and it doesn’t now.

    Since I haven’t read much of that comic or the comic strip, I am only poking fun at the names. Maybe it was the most enlightened character ever, in both incarnations. I don’t know. And, it doesn’t matter, I suppose. Well, it does matter. But, I can’t make a big to do about it.

    Just clarifying.

  232. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:17 pm [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#196): Oh, sure you can use that fancy, expensive 3M stuff if you want. I guess it works ok. But good old Reynolds wrap was good enough for my pappy, and it’s good enough for me!

    // I can’t even remember the last time I was abducted by aliens!

  233. Mikey
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:18 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#227): It makes sense now! Elrod is ripping off “Big Fish”!!!

  234. Borborygmy
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:18 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#232): I can’t even remember the last time I was abducted by aliens!

    And that is just the way they like it.

  235. Mikey
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:19 pm [Reply]

    @Mikey (#233): And Rusty is one of the freaks in the Circus! Wow! I feel so much better now!

  236. Mr. O’Malley
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:21 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#219): A plausible reason to have two identical cameras would be that one has a wide-angle lens and one has a telephoto. I often do something like that myself because I hate swapping lenses while I’m taking pictures. You might say why not use a zoom, but in a confined space like a small boat a fixed length lens might be more practical.

    A lot of photographers used to work that way back in the 1960s, when the quality of zoom lenses was not as good as it is now.

    I know the real answer must be “it’s stupid, because it’s in Mark Trail“, rather than “Mark is an outdoorsman and vintage camera enthusiast”.

  237. seismic-2
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:24 pm [Reply]

    @Mikey (#233): Catfish and Bluegill are the Siamese Twins, or maybe the Siamese Fighting Fish.

  238. Poteet
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:27 pm [Reply]

    @CanuckDownSouth (#166): Wow. Thank you very much! (And I salute you for the treadmill aspect.) Sounds a lot more amazing than a Pepto-Bismol Retro concoction with Mary on top. So if you could indulge me further, how is the time aspect handled on TV? I assume the entire twelve hours aren’t broadcast? Or are they? And do the contestants take meal and bathroom breaks, or do they just faint right there at the cake assembly table and get carried away to the medical tents?

  239. Kinghasnoclothes
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:29 pm [Reply]

    FW: The new lady is the mom’s lesbian lover who sees an opportunity to move in since the husband can’t object. The long lost daughter schtick is just a cover.
    And she has cancer.

  240. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:32 pm [Reply]

    @Chip Whittle (#210): What’s also bizarre about the fail-format blog there is that apparently someone else designed it for him, at least to go by the credit bar on the bottom. We obviously can’t tell whether it’s that way because TB wanted it that way, or his designer was incompetent, but either way, I’d not be wanting to claim credit for it!

  241. Old Folkie
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:44 pm [Reply]

    @bbofun (#201): I thought Blackhawk was put out by Quality Comics… HAWKAAAAAA!

  242. Taft
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:51 pm [Reply]

    I hear an ugly music playing.

    Luann The appointment is the doctors office where she will find out she is pregnant. This will set up a touching, poignant story line where everybody struggles with the life-changing-ness of it all and everyone learns something in the end. If it was the Funkyverse, I would say it would all lead to a miscarriage at 8 months 3 weeks, but since Greg Evans didn’t succumb to temptation and kill off Luann’s friend Delta when she got cancer, I would say the new hook is “Luann’s an Aunt!” They started the whole firefighter arc after 9/11 and there really haven’t been any real changes since then, so I would say we’re due, especially since that ridiculous attempt to break into the “High School Musical” market cratered so badly.

  243. Vince M
    February 4th, 2013 at 7:55 pm [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#122): Arrgh, I keep looking there and it’s the same strip that’s been there since Friday, on computer crime. Ou est le Marcus Traille?

  244. Mibbitmaker
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:07 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#100): Well, I’ve heard of those books, of course. I just didn’t make the connection to the author’s name off the top of my head. As my example showed, most of my literature is in graphic novel form.

  245. endless sky
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:09 pm [Reply]

    @Taft (#242): Luann: I had wondered about the “appointment,” too. And what is Shannon doing at the fire station if Toni is just getting off work? Was it “take your, er, niece to work” day? And why is Brad there, also apparently off duty? This would have made more sense if they had left off the fire truck in the background.

  246. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:10 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#230): So, there is a character named “Ebony White” and for a version of said black character they decided to go waaay out there and change the character around, making the character’s new name: “Eubie White”?

    One of the definitions for “ebony” in Merriam-Webster is black or dark. Which means the name of Denny Colt’s assistant/sidekick is literally “black white.”

    The name “Eubie” was undoubtedly inspired by black composer and lyricist Eubie Blake (one of the songs he wrote was “I’m Just Wild About Harry”). The Blake surname is likely derived from the Old English “blac,” a possible nickname for someone with dark hair or skin. Which means “Eubie Blake” can be loosely translated to “you be black/dark.”

    That’s probably more than you need — or care — to know, but it’s an interesting coincidence nonetheless. Plus, “Blake and White” sounds like the name I’d pick for a couple of tennis players/spies in a 1960s television series — IF I were casting Bill Cosby and Robert Culp as the leads.

  247. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:20 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#49): Some day, after I’ve made my fortune as a freshman composition instructor (what?), I will install a bone-shaped tub for my pups to frolic in!

  248. tallyHO
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:38 pm [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#246):

    Thanks for the explanation.

    I do agree that it would be a good name for a 60s spy idea.

    There was a want to clarify what I wrote because I didn’t want it to seem dense. I am curious to see how the character worked in the comic. To be frank, I didn’t even know The Spirit has a sidekick or had anyone helping him.

    And, to be even franker (so frank that Frank Lee Meidere might go, “You’re no Frank to me!”_

    The names are just silly and given the option, perhaps I’d come up with one or both for a funny character.

    Eubie Blake, yes, of course. There’s also Hubie, Herbie, Herve. There’s lots of goofy sounding, similarly spelled names. woo hoo!

  249. Peanut Gallery
    February 4th, 2013 at 8:51 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#232):

    I can’t even remember the last time I was abducted by aliens!

    That just proves that it really happened.

  250. Uncle Lumpy
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:09 pm [Reply]

    @endless sky (#245):

    Evans likes to draw fire trucks.

  251. Liam
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:18 pm [Reply]

    MT-Where did you get that second camera from? All I’ve seen was that one hanging around your neck.

  252. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:34 pm [Reply]

    @Liam (#251): Maybe he pulled it out of his fanny… pack.

  253. Liam
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:39 pm [Reply]

    A3G-”Tommie, you aren’t a nurse. You are really a physicist named Sam Beckett. You’ve invented a way of traveling through time. You leap around through time leaping into other people’s bodies and you need to set things right before you can leap out. There is a small problem though. You can’t control the leaps and so you keep leaping hoping that the next leap leads you home.” “Oh boy.”

  254. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:42 pm [Reply]

    @bbofun (#197): *SNURK!*

    and a LoFo Goose at that, them things are the size of A-10s and crap almost as much in payload.

    thankfully, no GAU-8.

  255. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 9:55 pm [Reply]

    @Liam (#253): That explains the blue background people in Apartment 3-G. They’re fellow scientists from “Project Quantum Leap” making multiple appearances as they cross back and forth along Tommie, Lu Ann and Margo’s timeline.

  256. tallyHO
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:06 pm [Reply]

    bourbon for those who are interested in reading about a brand of bourbon.

    //isn’t it Mardi Gras season? (or is that sea-ZHON!)?

  257. Amos Snarkadder, CQB
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:10 pm [Reply]

    @Calico (#146):

    I’m actually betting that some other team dropped their cake. James Joyce and Mother Nature will win the competition.

    I agree. But I think it will take all week to get there. Tomorrow another competitor’s cake will explode. Then the following day, a cake will dissolve into a pool of yellow goo. Then another cake can’t be moved because it’s become glued to the prep table. By Saturday all the other cakes will be eliminated and JJ and Moms Natch will be the only ones left standing.

  258. CanuckDownSouth
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:13 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#238): You’re quite right that they don’t broadcast the whole thing. It’s been a while since I’ve seen one of the all-day-long extravagant challenges, but they make a 1-2 hr show out of even the long (8? 10? 12? hr) ones. Even something like Cupcake Wars with 3 rounds amounting to 4 hrs total of baking/ decorating time is shown in a 1 hr show. I’ve never seen an explanation of breaks, but I’m assuming the teams working all day on some crazy edible extravaganza contest have some access to bathrooms and food. For something like Cupcake Wars (max round time: 2hrs), I assume they get to rest and eat a bit between rounds.

  259. tallyHO
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:13 pm [Reply]

    @Amos Snarkadder, CQB (#257):

    My great expectation is that John and Mary’s cake will drop them.

  260. John and Mary’s Cake
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:16 pm [Reply]

    I.
    Am.
    Outta Here!

    Pink?
    You made me PINK? Really? Were Springtime color schemes just too much to handle? Could you not see how Yellow would accent my curves?

    What’s with the vomit!?!
    Oh, that’s not vomit?

    It is is river representing unicorn love? Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

    You two are sick!
    S. I. C. K!
    Sick!

  261. Sequitur
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:22 pm [Reply]

    Don’t want your cake dropped? It’s all in the labeling.

    Or not.

  262. CEH3rd
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:22 pm [Reply]

    @Taft (#242): Come now, sir. For your theory to be correct actual physical intimacy would presumably have taken place. In a universe where trying on some of your girlfriend’s makeup is getting to “third base” I don’t see how such a thing could happen. Baseball has but four bases sir. Brad would need at least six more than that to approach fatherhood…

  263. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:25 pm [Reply]

    @Amos Snarkadder, CQB (#257): I’m beginning to suspect that the whole
    “They Shoot Cakes, Don’t They?” storyline is based on a Sidney Pollack film:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/They_Shoot_Horses,_Don%27t_They%3F_%28film%29

    If Hollywood comes a knockin’ on Karen Moy’s door, I call first dibs on the part of “Rocky” (played by Gig Young in the 1969 original).

  264. Trillian
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:31 pm [Reply]

    @Taft (#242):
    How can Toni be pregnant? She and Brad have never actually had sex? Is the baby’s name going to be Jesus or Dirk, Jr.?

  265. Trillian
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:32 pm [Reply]

    @Trillian (#264): I? went? a? little? question? mark? crazy? there?

  266. SurrealKangaroo
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:34 pm [Reply]

    Do Pluggers even live in places where there are nude beaches?

  267. Poteet
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:38 pm [Reply]

    @CanuckDownSouth (#258): Thank you again. Your explanation confirms that the Santa Royale six-hour extravaganza really is crazy.

  268. steamroller, baby
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:54 pm [Reply]

    “Tommie, we need to talk. Why are you wearing that garish green shirt instead of your hospital-issued color-changing blouse? And how will people know your a nurse without your hat???”

  269. Poteet
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:54 pm [Reply]

    A3G — I have a very bad feeling that the reason Tommie has traveled back in time is to be a midwife at her own birth, thereby turning Time itself into a giant dissolving Mobius strip. Save us, Doctor Who!

  270. greghousesgf
    February 4th, 2013 at 10:55 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#225): maybe he was gay, he obviously prefers Barney’s company to Wilma’s.

  271. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:13 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#256): mmmm, Makers Mark.

  272. tallyHO
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:13 pm [Reply]

    @greghousesgf (#270):

    Well you know who to blame for for that.
    The Great Gazoo and his great gazoo!

  273. Amos Snarkadder, CQB
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:14 pm [Reply]

    @Trillian (#264):

    Is the baby’s name going to be Jesus or Dirk, Jr.?

    Jonah, Jr.

  274. tallyHO
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:17 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#271):

    As the Crow flies, Markers Mark soars!

  275. bats :[
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:21 pm [Reply]

    Because it’s been one of those days, with
    a peculiar sense of humor,
    intense action, and
    the usual batshit logic so common on Monday.

  276. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:23 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#256): Interesting story, but the bourbon? Meh. (Try Buffalo Trace or Four Roses Single Barrel, among other, better bourbons.)

  277. Dawn Weston's Evil Twin
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:38 pm [Reply]

    Mary Worth: YES! Cake dropping action! Life is brutal!

  278. Trillian
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:38 pm [Reply]

    @Amos Snarkadder, CQB (#273): Are you calling Toni a whale? That’s not very nice…

  279. Trillian
    February 4th, 2013 at 11:45 pm [Reply]

    @Trillian (#264): A little known fact about the Second Coming: This time, the Lord’s father needs to be a virgin. Oh, and no miracles are actually involved.

  280. Gladly, the cross-eyed bear
    February 5th, 2013 at 12:16 am [Reply]

    MW: From this angle, it’s easy to see why John Dill named this cake “Vagin-o-mite!”

  281. Taft
    February 5th, 2013 at 12:18 am [Reply]

    @Trillian (#264), @CEH3rd (#262):
    I really, really want to believe that nothing happened. However, I have this nagging suspicion that the previous weeks “Fun With Makeup” is Maestro Evan’s idea of an operatic overture, and, taking a page from “Tannhauser” he put the ballet in the first act. Since no one wants to see the ballet, he skipped directly to act two, where the conflict starts. Next, an intermezzo to catch up on various inconsequential supporting characters and pad the thing through to August. Act three is redemption and perhaps another heroism related injury for Brad.

    For the sake of humanity, I hope I am wrong.

  282. Trillian
    February 5th, 2013 at 12:33 am [Reply]

    @Taft (#281): Yeah, won’t we feel silly (and relieved!) when it turns out Toni was going to the dentist!

  283. tallyHO
    February 5th, 2013 at 12:36 am [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#276):

    will try the others. I haven’t even heard of those two.

    Tuesday’s Comic Strips:
    So far, not so great. It is baby step Tuesday.

  284. bbofun
    February 5th, 2013 at 12:55 am [Reply]

    @Old Folkie (#241): It was, then Quality went out of business. DC bought the rights to many of their characters, including the Blackhawks, Plastic Man, and Phantom Lady (hubba-hubba!). Other characters are now in public domain.

    *sings* The more you know….

  285. Baka Gaijin
    February 5th, 2013 at 1:09 am [Reply]

    Tuesday’s Mary Worth

    That cake wasn’t dropped; it was pushed! Look at Blondie’s stance…

    Yanking the cake off the table, Mary not only ends up on the floor with a pink mess on her lap but also a great hernia and shattered hip to boot.

    What happened to all that sweet pink icing floooowwwing down the back of the cake? I’ll tell you. It’s on the floor by the next contestants’ table, waiting to cause a slip up worthy of The Three Stooges.

    This must not be clip art; everyone’s all off-model and minimially-detailed.

  286. bbofun
    February 5th, 2013 at 1:11 am [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#248): To answer the question about how Ebony was portrayed/used in The Spirit- let’s just say it can be uncomfortable reading those old stories. Ebony was depicted as a short black youngster (most people take him to be about 12 years old)- despite the fact that he drives a cab. He was apparently an orphan, who ended up being taken in by The Spirit, sharing his HQ in Wildwood Cemetery. Eventually, Spirit and his friends sent Ebony off to college, and there was great, familial affection. Ebony, in addition to great skills as a driver, was also an effective investigator, helping the Spirit out on his missions. What was the problem, then?

    Well, there’s this-http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Do1wtnYf2yQ/SGG6LWdGiEI/AAAAAAAABpw/ias8Ak2CsFs/s400/Ebony.jpg ,from his original appearance, and this http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FVXCQBs2iUU/S_lP_fkFMsI/AAAAAAAACog/rvOhTb4iOSA/s1600/ebony.jpg from a few years later. His speech pattern didn’t change much either.

    Later versions of the character, as you might expect, were a bit different. Eisner himself did have regrets about his portrayal of Ebony, although he also said he never got complaints at the time from African-American groups. Notably, he also did create other black characters in The Spirit, including a detective, who were not drawn as stereotypes, and who spoke English perfectly well.

  287. tallyHO
    February 5th, 2013 at 1:40 am [Reply]

    @bbofun (#286):

    oooof! That one hit the gut hard.

    That’s totally not what I had in mind.

    As for Eisner, when I was a kid his (two?) books on comics were ones which I read. Somehow, I just rarely ever saw much of his comics. Of course he had lots going for him and was inventive. The character(s) never grabbed me though. Maybe when I’m older…I’ll subject myself to it.

  288. seismic-2
    February 5th, 2013 at 1:43 am [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#276), @tallyHO (#283): As a matter of fact, for the last week or so I have indeed been sipping from a recently purchased bottle of Four Roses Single Barrel (as opposed to the Four Roses Small Batch, which I buy more often simply because the more expensive single-barrel is harder to find). I agree that it’s a nice one (if you “win” the single-barrel roulette by getting a bottle drawn from a good barrel, of course). For single-barrel bourbon, I still prefer Blanton’s, though. (When you reach the “bourbon” section of the liquor store, just look for the bottle that has a little silver race horse on the stopper.) As for a wheated bourbon (which is fairly rare, since most bourbons use rye rather than wheat as the “other” grain to add to the corn mash), Faker’s – er, Maker’s Mark is good enough, but Van Winkle’s is in a class to itself. Of course, for that kind of money you might as well buy a top-shelf single malt Scotch, sigh.

  289. bbofun
    February 5th, 2013 at 1:45 am [Reply]

    MW- One mystery solved- apparently, the contest rules call for a nature theme, in a single color not normally found in nature. Things are looking up for John and Mary- if only john could get that head-twitch under control!

    ASM- I think Mary Jane speaks for us all.

    A3G- Nurse Dawkins will be played by Dame Maggie Smith, as the Dowager Countess.

    A3G (take 2)- “And what purpose will that serve?” could pretty much be said to anything Tommie proposes doing.

    Quick A3G note- some commenters have remarked that Tommie being out of the apartment seemed awfully convenient. I actually recall this all being set up wayyyy back in December, when Margo was trying to get the girls to have a Christmas party- Luann was going off with her aunt/mother to Texas, and Tommie was pulling a double shift. So, yes, convenient- but actually set up!

    Gil Thorpe- Somebody REALLY needs to show these guys the peacock.

    JP- “…something she may have bought? Something like, oh, I don’t know- a new hat? A yacht? Some heroin? A cursed antique mirror? A blue police box? Breast implants? Some magic beans?”

    DT- have to say, this “sweating” shtick is pretty handy for a criminal- how can you tell if he’s lying? He could probably fool a polygraph. (Note- I, personally, spell it “schtick”- my spell check disagrees. So I leave it to you, curmudgeons- which is right?)

    Crankshaft- I (to my dismay) actually find this a pretty dang clever pun. I’m sure I’ll get over it.

  290. seismic-2
    February 5th, 2013 at 1:51 am [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#288): Oh, and for an excellent single-barrel bourbon with a bit more “woody” flavor, don’t forget the Elijah Craig 18-year (as I just did, in that post). Yum!!!!

  291. Uncle Lumpy
    February 5th, 2013 at 2:05 am [Reply]

    Milestone alert: post #310 on this thread will be the 600,000th non-spam comment on the Comics Curmudgeon.

  292. seismic-2
    February 5th, 2013 at 2:21 am [Reply]

    @Uncle Lumpy (#291): But will it open a garage door in Ankara?

  293. Uncle Lumpy
    February 5th, 2013 at 2:29 am [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#292):

    Fastidious content! My sister BuzzedIn on DropBook for your guest link, and it loads so fast! ωhat about that!

  294. Droopy Says
    February 5th, 2013 at 4:19 am [Reply]

    Spiderdick: Spoiderdick feels needed! In his dreams, maybe, but not MJ’s.

    Flunky: “Beside, we were both so drunk the night it happened, it was impossible to retcon remember it clearly.”

    Family Circus: Sorry, Dolly, that sweater won’t stretch into a size XXBeachball.

    Mary Mirthless: Careful with the single entendres, Mary.

    Pluggers: Pluggers know that if you repeat the question often enough, you’ll anyone someone into giving you the answer you want. But the suit pants still won’t have an elastic band.

    Mock Travail: Is it just me or does that duck look bored?

    Phantom: Wow! Kit punched Desk Jockey so hard that he flew like a boomerang and landed back in he office! Beat that, Fists o’ Justice!

  295. John C Fremont
    February 5th, 2013 at 5:45 am [Reply]

    @bbofun (#289): I argue with my spellcheck on a daily basis, but this time I have to agree with it. Google, however, is telling me that both “shtick” and “schtick” are acceptable.

    Okay, spellcheck, you’ve won this round, but don’t get cocky. Or peacocky.

  296. gleeb
    February 5th, 2013 at 6:59 am [Reply]

    ‘bean: Unpleasant memories in a Batiuk strip? No kiddin’.

    Interrogating Sophie: Is there a reason Abbey is dancing around the subject? Just tell Sophie; she’ll find out soon enough.

    Dick: Well, obviously, someone with a lot of corpses lying around the house taking up room. Have you checked out Tracy?

    Doones: Young people, right?

    Frank and Ernest: Hurray, they’re dead!

  297. CanuckDownSouth
    February 5th, 2013 at 7:15 am [Reply]

    FW: You’re uncomfortable about your messy divorce and lack of custody so you never tell your son that he has a sibling, depriving them of any chance at a relationship even as adults?? I have got to drop this strip; I don’t need a daily dose of these are all horrible, horrible people

  298. Little Guy
    February 5th, 2013 at 7:35 am [Reply]

    Blondie: “We’re going the wrong WAY!!!!!”

  299. Hogenmogen
    February 5th, 2013 at 7:57 am [Reply]

    With Darkgate not updating many strips, I feel like commenting on some out-of-the-way strips that may or may not be ready for prime time.

    Brewster Rockit is a hit or miss kind of a strip. Today, I’d give it a “hit” rating.

    Day By Day is supposed to be a political strip for the right wing. I don’t know how much traction they’ll get in the Bible Belt when the only gag seems to be “Obama is a jerk, and look at my BREASTS.” Today, panel 2 treats us to what it would look like if I were a chick looking down at my own body. Shockingly, I realized that I was never curious.

    Dumbing of Age has an interesting plotline going on with a lesbian coming to terms with the fact that she’s a Canadian. Or maybe it’s the other way around.

    Monty drinks Pepsi brand beer.

    Cameos on Tom the Dancing Bug include Tommie Thompson, Margo Magee, Barney Fife and Curtis’s younger brother Barry.

  300. Hogenmogen
    February 5th, 2013 at 8:01 am [Reply]

    SM:
    “What’s that got to do with you?”
    “Spiderman may be needed!”
    “Did you just refer to yourself in the third person? I’m going to feign sleep now. You suck.”

  301. Hogenmogen
    February 5th, 2013 at 8:06 am [Reply]

    A3G: Does Nurse Wretched really think that Tommie can be entrusted to save lives after you told her that her apartment is in flames? “Your place burned, your roommate may be dead, but don’t leave or do anything differently. Get on with your work. More zippers, mule!”

  302. Hogenmogen
    February 5th, 2013 at 8:16 am [Reply]

    MW: You pick up a cake from one table and you carefully place it on the table about 10 feet away. And this takes a week of practice plus a week of high drama in Mary Worth. Ok.

    At least we were whiplashed by the sudden revelation that it was the evil blue team that dropped their cake, and not the more virtuous but equally monochromatic hot pink team.

  303. Hogenmogen
    February 5th, 2013 at 8:21 am [Reply]

    @Uncle Lumpy (#291): If I remember correctly, there was a transfer to a new server a few years ago that dropped a bunch of comments. That’s why if you look at some of the early posts, they have so amazingly few comments. True, the following was smaller, but that’s not the complete explanation. So really, we’re already past the milestone.

  304. Old Folkie
    February 5th, 2013 at 9:44 am [Reply]

    @bbofun (#284): Thanks – did not know that. BTW, Plastic Man was my fav comic in the 50s. If only my Dad hadn’t thrown them away…. :(

  305. Illustrator Steve
    February 5th, 2013 at 10:01 am [Reply]

    MT – Rod Bassy, with Mark as his passenger, speeds to his first fishing spot with TOTAL disregard for the local ecosystem as his boat’s wake wipes out a Mallard’s habitat just as it lays an Elrod autographed ball shaped egg.

  306. The Ridger
    February 5th, 2013 at 6:54 pm [Reply]

    @Vince M (#243): Marcus Traille will not be at Kos until next week. Somebody’s abusing his privileges as a member of the Inner Hive!

  307. Fredrick
    August 27th, 2013 at 6:59 pm [Reply]

    Hi there just wanted to give you a brief heads up and let you know
    a few of the images aren’t loading properly. I’m not sure why
    but I think its a linking issue. I’ve tried it in two different browsers and both show the same outcome.

  308. rencontre salope valence
    August 29th, 2013 at 10:24 am [Reply]

    After looking at a number of the articles on your site, I honestly appreciate your technique of blogging.
    I saved as a favorite it to my bookmark site list and will be checking back soon.
    Please visit my web site as well and tell me how you feel.

  309. website creation software
    September 3rd, 2013 at 6:11 am [Reply]

    This site was… how do I say it? Relevant!! Finally I’ve found something that helped me.

    Thanks!

  310. site de rencontre coquin
    September 4th, 2013 at 4:20 am [Reply]

    My coder is trying to convince me to move to .net from PHP.
    I have always disliked the idea because of the expenses.
    But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using WordPress on various websites for
    about a year and am anxious about switching to another platform.
    I have heard good things about blogengine.net. Is there a
    way I can transfer all my wordpress posts into it?
    Any kind of help would be really appreciated!

  311. rencontre coquine gratuit
    January 4th, 2014 at 10:41 am [Reply]

    Do you have a spam problem on this blog; I also
    am a blogger, and I was curious about your situation; we have developed some nice
    procedures and we are looking to trade strategies with others, please shoot me
    an e-mail if interested.

  312. Courtney
    January 5th, 2014 at 4:07 am [Reply]

    What i don’t realize is in reality how you are not really much more
    neatly-preferred than you may be right now. You are very intelligent.

    You realize thus considerably on the subject of this subject, made me individually imagine it from so many
    various angles. Its like women and men aren’t fascinated except it is one thing to
    do with Lady gaga! Your individual stuffs nice. All the time deal with it up!

  313. sustainabledelco.org
    January 5th, 2014 at 4:49 am [Reply]

    It’s going to be finish of mine day, however before finish I am
    reading this impressive post to increase my experience.

  314. comment grossir le penis
    January 5th, 2014 at 1:07 pm [Reply]

    What’s up to all, it’s actually a nice for me to go to see this website, it includes valuable Information.

  315. psychic
    January 6th, 2014 at 4:22 am [Reply]

    I loved as much as you will receive carried out right here.

    The sketch is tasteful, your authored subject matter stylish.

    nonetheless, you command get got an edginess over that you
    wish be delivering the following. unwell unquestionably come
    more formerly again as exactly the same nearly very
    often inside case you shield this increase.

  316. ?????????
    January 9th, 2014 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

    There is certainly a great deal to find out about this subject.
    I really like all the points you have made.

  317. ?????????
    January 9th, 2014 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

    There is certainly a great deal to find out about this subject.
    I really like all the points you have made.

  318. face lift without surgery
    January 9th, 2014 at 4:35 pm [Reply]

    I visited several websites except the audio quality for audio songs existing at this web site is in fact
    fabulous.

  319. plan cul gratuit
    January 9th, 2014 at 5:56 pm [Reply]

    excellent submit, very informative. I ponder why the opposite specialists of this sector do not realize this.
    You should proceed your writing. I am sure, you’ve a huge readers’ base
    already!

  320. injuries car accidents
    January 12th, 2014 at 1:03 pm [Reply]

    Just wish to say your article is as astounding.
    The clearness in your post is simply nice and i could assume you are
    an expert on this subject. Well with your permission let me
    to grab your feed to keep up to date with forthcoming post.
    Thanks a million and please carry on the rewarding work.

Comments are closed for this post.