The Comics Curmudgeon

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Soapy one-liners

Gil Thorp, 7/17/08

While it’s true that the U.S. military was under intense pressure to come up with an “outside the box” solution that would bring the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan to successful conclusions, “colossally misguided” was one of the kinder things future strategists and historians would have to say about the decision to deploy the Milford Mudlarks against the Taliban.

Apartment 3-G, 7/17/08

Desperate to stay relevant and solvent in a rapidly changing society, the League Of Wandering Eastern Holy Men signed a three-year contract with Hallmark to deliver all of their gnomic advice and warnings in greeting card form.

Judge Parker, 7/17/08

Sam surveyed the scene and had to be pleased: the dunce-capped lawyers from Dewey and Cheatem stood with their heads slumped, reciting their bourgeois, parasitic crimes against the proletariat in a soul-broken monotone, so that $50,000 advance couldn’t be far off; plus, the peasants who were occupying the newly nationalized golf course were well on their way towards meeting their five-year-plan goals for steel production.

Spider-Man, 7/17/08

I was going to make a “surrender Dorothy” joke here, but then I realized that Dorothy Gale showed courage, loyalty, and initiative, and in no way deserves to be compared to Spider-Man — except in the sense that she defeated her nemesis by accident, which is probably the best that Peter Parker can hope for.

This entry was posted on Thursday, July 17, 2008 at 10:00 am and is filed under Apartment 3-G, Gil Thorp, Judge Parker, Spider-Man.

245 responses to “Soapy one-liners”

Roger
July 17th, 2008 at 10:03 am [Reply]

Gil Thorp: Is the USA really delivering draft notices by telephone now? That seems problematic for any number of reasons.

If they do, though, you must excuse me: I’ve a large number of prank calls to make, starting immediately.
Hank
July 17th, 2008 at 10:09 am [Reply]

RE: Gil Thorp. So now they have a draft in the Thorpiverse? Wow. No wonder people are obsessed with high school sports there. Between the arbitrary and capricious child protective laws, the bizarre immigration policies and, now, the mandatory conscription laws, the place is obviously a Kafkaesque nightmare.

RE: Crankshaft. I see Tom “the grim reaper” Batuik has struck again. Would someone arrange an intervention and fill this idiot’s prozac prescription already?
Shermy Glamrocker
July 17th, 2008 at 10:13 am [Reply]

Try this, kids. If you start Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side of the Moon” on the second panel of the first strip beginning a Spider-man story line … you’ll hear the album all the way through exactly 14,732 times before the story line is through.
lorne
July 17th, 2008 at 10:19 am [Reply]

Boy. Life sure is great in Mexico. Why was Elmer fighting so hard to stay?
That’s a lesson for all you kids straight from Gil Thorpe. Mexicans are happier in Mexico where god intended them to be.

Of course if you pull the frame back a bit, you’ll see that Elmer is happily beating the crap out of a gang leader to take over leadership of a band of 10 year old urchin criminals, two of whom are cheering his ascendancy.
Nekrotzar
July 17th, 2008 at 10:21 am [Reply]

OK, I haven’t been following Spiderman religiously (or at all, for that matter), but exactly what crime did this Vulture commit that makes him a super-villain? Skywriting without a permit?
TheDiva
July 17th, 2008 at 10:25 am [Reply]

Oh no, I killed the last thread! Reprise:

C’shaft: I’m not sure if the old bat is dead or not, but I hope she is. It means this will be the last time Batiuk drags out this old “cranky mom-in-law tries to be independent, EMTs are called out” storyline.

Curtis: I love animation–be it cel, computer, stop-motion, or what have you–but I know very little about its workings as a profession. However, the more I read about Sub Guy the less I think “noble craftsman pushed out of the industry by cold technology” and the more I think “bitter, whiny shlub who likes to blame everyone else for his problems.”

Zits: Pop quiz: what zany, exaggerated method will Mom use to try and wake Jeremy up tomorrow? My money’s on an atom bomb.
Little Guy
July 17th, 2008 at 10:26 am [Reply]

On the one hand, you have Ray Billingsly using his strip to bemoan the demise of the hand-crafted animator.

I wonder what ubergeek and BSG fanboy Darrin Bell thinks about this. No computer animation, no plethora of SF shows.

Zippy: Incredible. Non-sequitor, BUT it reaches to the masses.
man behind the curtain
July 17th, 2008 at 10:28 am [Reply]

GT — Thinking he’s been drafted by the US Army and not major league baseball, Jimmy Hughes flees to Mexico and winds up playing for the same Mexican league team as Elmer Vargas. Hopefully it will be the CuliacanTomato Growers.

http://www.tomateros.com.mx/
Perky Bird
July 17th, 2008 at 10:33 am [Reply]

Judge Parker: All this angst over a game of golf?Imagine if the publishers had challenged him to compete on a sadistic Japanese game show.
Anon
July 17th, 2008 at 10:38 am [Reply]

You know why the comments pages run into the hundred counts?

“oh, you didn’t see my bon mot in the last thread, here it is again”

Stop re-posting stuff.

It we want to read it we will see it.

All we really care about is what the Pope has to say anyway.
zenvelo
July 17th, 2008 at 10:40 am [Reply]

so the denizens of Winkerbean live to see another day, while the evil eye of Sauron Batuik is focused on Crankshaft
Jeff Hebert
July 17th, 2008 at 10:41 am [Reply]

Happy birthday, Josh! And remember, 34 isn’t old, it’s just getting old …
Nate
July 17th, 2008 at 10:46 am [Reply]

He may have been drafted, but from the entrance he’s making onto the back porch to tell his dad about it, the whole “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy is a pretty moot point.
The Mighty Monarch
July 17th, 2008 at 10:46 am [Reply]

9CL: How not gay is Claudio? Not gay enough to repeatedly ask women for written affirmations that he is not gay. No sexual repression there, no sir-ee!

FOOB: Anthony decides to preemptively give all the pedos in the park a glimpse up his daughter’s jumper. Father of the year, folks!

MT: To be fair, Cherry, you can replace “Kelly” in that sentence with any other character in the strip and it’ll be just as accurate. Perhaps moreso.
Huntch
July 17th, 2008 at 10:52 am [Reply]

Re Sally Forth and Ted Forth: I have been thinking about this for several months (actually, I thought about it several months ago, and just remembered). I believe Ted Forth has some kind of oedipus thing going on. I think he must be the son of the original Sally Forth (by Wally Wood) and has such psychological trauma about his mother that he married a woman with the same name. But, he married a woman who is as totally unlike his mother as possible. Except that she,(SF-II), is also, (like SF-I), willing to take charge and get things done when the men in her life are unable to perform or handle the situation. Now I will go back to thinking about Ted’s psyche, about what SF-II is willing to do in the scope of a “family strip” to get pregnant, and about how much I prefer looking at SF-I !
The Ghost of Jarrod
July 17th, 2008 at 10:54 am [Reply]

‘Shaft — Why do you wonder if your mom had a good last night in her house? Of course she didn’t have a good last night in her house. This is Batuik’s universe. You just live in it.
Dingo
July 17th, 2008 at 10:56 am [Reply]

With chin slightly raised to eliminate her wattle and a Pablo Cruise t-shirt to show that once she was hip to popular culture, Mary tells Jeff she’s her own woman. Somewhere, quietly, Elizabeth Cady Stanton spins in her grave.
Ces
July 17th, 2008 at 10:58 am [Reply]

Hey All,

Just wanted to let you know that for one week, July 28-August 2 (with a Sunday strip on August 24), I will be taking over art and writing duties for “Bizarro” thanks to the kindness of the strip’s creator Dan Piraro, who took time off to fight crime or whatever it is he does when he dons a cape and cowl, jumps out his apartment window and says, “Don’t wait up.”

The strip will still appear under the name “Bizarro” but will feature my own comics and the url for my webcomic “Medium Large” (medium-large.com, which is still in what we web designers like to call the ‘unmitigated disaster’ phase of construction). Those familiar with the “Medium Large” archives will no doubt recognize some of the strips. Those familiar with Dan’s sheer mastery of the comic strip art form and his unique brand of hilarity will no doubt be disappointed (as you can clearly see, I have yet to get a firm grasp on self-promotion despite years as a copywriter and a therapy patient).

Dan will also be reviewing each strip the day of publication on his blog (http://bizarrocomic.blogspot.com/), where he will surely pepper his critiques of my comics with such bon mots as “mere dilettante,” “a national disgrace” and “this bastard has ruined me.”

This is the first time Dan has used a guest cartoonist in the history of his strip. By the end of my run we’ll see if it will be his last.

Thank you!
Francesco Marciuliano
Writer, “Sally Forth”
Cartoonist, “Medium Large”
Apologist, Everything Else
zadig
July 17th, 2008 at 11:00 am [Reply]

There has to be a joke combining Little Red the title and Penick the author that doesn’t involve sexual parts, but I’m afraid I’m not mature enough to come up with it.
Bitt Faulk
July 17th, 2008 at 11:01 am [Reply]

FWIW, Harvey Penick’s Little Red Book is a real book.
Bitter Scribe
July 17th, 2008 at 11:02 am [Reply]

So Elmer gets uprooted and deported, and he’s cheerfully playing baseball in Mexico. It’s nice to know that, while the artwork in Gil Thorp may be radically different, the right-wing politics preserve their continuity.

Of course, Elmer’s happiness may have something to do with the fact that he’s apparently playing in a league of six-year-olds, which will really give him a chance to shine.
Sharktattoo
July 17th, 2008 at 11:03 am [Reply]

Is it just me, or has Spidey’s cold/flu/Ebola lasted longer than most wars?
Matt Algren
July 17th, 2008 at 11:05 am [Reply]

How is Peter Parker still sick?!? It’s been MONTHS!
Al Ewing
July 17th, 2008 at 11:05 am [Reply]

Tomorrow’s Mary Worth: “LIMIT ME YOU STALLION”
Muffaroo
July 17th, 2008 at 11:06 am [Reply]

A3G – Here’s where Eric gains a purpose, after which he’ll drop out of sight, having become ineligible for this comic strip.

AD – Credit where due: good reverse action from TFB.

Crank – “EMTs! Oh my god — quick! If we can get a refund on the storage unit deposit, we’re going out to the most expensive restaurant in town!”

DtM – “Mr. Wilson is going to the hospital for some tests, Dennis.” “I’ll bet you’re glad Batiuk doesn’t write this!”

DT – Where did Shirl Locke get a real eye, all of a sudden? Does it only come out in the dark?

FB – Is this an actual idiom they use over there? I saw a similar situation handled better in Nancy. The Jerry Scott Nancy. Cringe in shame, Fred Basket Case!

GT – And so, Jimmy is drafted to go off to Vietnam. What? This takes place in the late 60s, right?

MT – Okay, okay, the fearsome Prairie Chickenzilla likes to play with its perfectly round egg, and the artist finds that more interesting than the protagonists. I guess that’s probably a good call. Kelly, meanwhile, continues to tempt fate by crossing her eyes constantly. She’ll get stuck that way — just ask Bucky or Shirl!

Marvin – Humorist’s Textbook: If it’s not funny for a day, or a week, try it for a month.

MW – “Don’t ever change.”
“Are you telling ME what to DO?”

Peanuts – Linus flirts with tragedy, then does the right thing.

R=R – Kind of funny today.

Zzzzzzzzits – I think I’ll join Jeremy…
Laura c
July 17th, 2008 at 11:06 am [Reply]

I can’t figure out that thing wearing a dress in the first panel of FOOB. Is it the ghost of Anne Boleyn? (And if so, why isn’t she carrying her head under her arm like she’s supposed to?) Or is it just a very very wrong-shaped shrub?
Lake Eerie
July 17th, 2008 at 11:06 am [Reply]

De-lurking for the first time in months, thanks to Family Circus…
Have we really reached the essence of this cartoon? Just a drawing of Jeffy standing outside, no other characters, props or context, with a random caption.
How many others did Jeff/Bil cycle through before landing on this Dodgeball gem?
“I just swallowed a fly. Is that bad?”
“Is it still considered an accident if I soil my underwear on purpose?”
“I’m just standing here until God puts me in my place.”
If I can’t play first base I’m taking my oversized melon-shaped head and going home.”
“Bary? Kittycat? Granddad?”
“My brother’s an animator at Disney and this, alas, is my Purgatory.”
Bookworm
July 17th, 2008 at 11:15 am [Reply]

’shaft - so much for a “guilt-free” night at home alone. Whether mom’s dead or not (we can only hope), she has finally managed to pile such a ponderous portion of parental guilt on her only progeny that he will be rendered completely ineffective for the rest of his life. ————- Oh, wait, she’s already managed that. Can anyone say, overdramatic?
The Party Sim
July 17th, 2008 at 11:16 am [Reply]

A3G: Six yards??? How big IS Margo?
Anson Pants
July 17th, 2008 at 11:18 am [Reply]

MW: Jeff realizes that Mary Worth is somewhat like dry ice. And by “somewhat” I mean “exactly”.

FW: In the Funky Winkerbean universe a windshield only displays black and white. Where did they buy the car, the same place that Barfo and Catastra bought TV sets ?
Calico
July 17th, 2008 at 11:19 am [Reply]

#198 yesterthread Re: Zits – I’m hoping for a water cannon, or maybe a Britney Spears recording.
Honeypot
July 17th, 2008 at 11:21 am [Reply]

MW: No, Mary, don’t ever change. Sheesh. We all saw you do the things Jeff accused you of, day by agonizing day. Then you got dumped by the guy you were “counseling” and allowed Jeff to grovel his way back into your good graces. His reward: an orange dinner consisting of some shrimp chunks and a bowl of unidentifiable orange goo. This stunning repast was accompanied by a few tepid hugs and a whole lotta self-righteous smug. Hey, Jeff – hope it was worth it, big guy. Rock on, Mary. Your readers are all a-quiver to find out what your next big adventure will be.

JP: Lucky for Sam that Steve just happened to have a copy of that book in his desk. Lucky for us, too, considering how long it would take in JP time for him to go home and get it.

Crankshaft: I had a wild vision of the next panel: EMT Techs hauling Crank out on a stretcher, Rose in the doorway huddled in a blanket.

Spidee-poo: I saw the Dark Knight last night and Spiderman this morning. Nothing like a little contrast to brighten up your day! Whoever is responsible for that strip should be ashamed of themselves.
Hogenmogen
July 17th, 2008 at 11:22 am [Reply]

“Spiderman – - Meet Vulture at noon.”

Spiderman sits for five hours on a rooftop waiting for the mysterious skywriter to continue with a location.
Jeffsterr
July 17th, 2008 at 11:22 am [Reply]

JP: Sure, all you need to become a good golfer/publishing aganet is to be read Mao’s book on an airplane.
Flipper
July 17th, 2008 at 11:28 am [Reply]

#27 Lake Eerie – LOL, funny stuff! Posts like yours are the only reason I hope The Family Circus never ends.

Crankshaft: There’s no way Batiuk would deprive us of years of strips ending with Rose sourly staring at Ed while he spews a convoluted pun. I’m thinking 911 was called to save Rose’s yappy little dog, or else her nurse. Probably the now unnecessary nurse, since “Rose’s dog versus Crankshaft’s cat” is unmined comedy gold!
kippetje2000
July 17th, 2008 at 11:29 am [Reply]

Non-secret message: Happy Birthday Josh. Thanks for letting us celebrate with you. L.
Calico
July 17th, 2008 at 11:32 am [Reply]

#33 – But which of them will pay for lunch?
Only time will tell…

Happy Birthday Josh!
Lake Eerie
July 17th, 2008 at 11:34 am [Reply]

CS – Wait, a possible tragedy in Crankshaft? I thought this was the “funny” Batiuk strip.
FW – Perhaps F. Winkerbean is handling the comic relief again. Here we have a play on words, a miniscule step up from yesterday’s “Smirk smugly at jerk being told to hang up his cellphone” bit
FBOFW – This should show all you Anthony-haters. See, he’s a great father (Note to LJ: perhaps having him actually help with the wedding planning could help garner some popularity for him)
Luann – Hey, a potentially funny visual joke? Too bad the context is a bit skeazy
shnazzer
July 17th, 2008 at 11:34 am [Reply]

18. Yay. I love and desperately miss medium large. now i’m all giddy about which ones will be appearing…
Calico
July 17th, 2008 at 11:36 am [Reply]

#25 Re: MW – “Don’t ever change”
And so, Mary wears the same stinking T-shirt and pants for the next two years.
I don’t even want to consider the granny underwear and steel mesh bra.
migellito
July 17th, 2008 at 11:36 am [Reply]

Ces – awesome!! I can’t wait! Your talent for shameless self-promotion leaves me champing at the bit!
Hogenmogen
July 17th, 2008 at 11:37 am [Reply]

JP: I’m one of those that find playing golf to be quite stimulating. There’s nothing like a bunch of middle age to old white guys walking after little pock-marked balls. Yet, far more exciting is to see a comic strip character play golf. Oh, even more invigorating is a story line of two comic strip characters talking about golf. It’s positively electrifying to wake up each morning and breathlessly open the newspaper to watch a comic strip character READ about golf. I’m going to have a climactic screaming orgasm if Sam Driver puts the book down and ponders shrimp scampi.
Revenge of Chesnut
July 17th, 2008 at 11:40 am [Reply]

Dude, do you guys think the Vulture really believes Spiderman will see his sky-written message and show up (to an undisclosed location) at noon, or is he just being a passive-aggressive asshole? “Yeah, Spiderman, meet me at noon! Except for that we all know that I will get credit for challenging you publicly, while the chances of you tearing your eyes away from the television long enough to see my message are very slim. To none. And you won’t show. And I won’t have to actually fight you. 50 points for the vulture!”
Hogenmogen
July 17th, 2008 at 11:44 am [Reply]

Note to Lynn Johnson – You complain that your chosen medium only allows you to show 30 seconds of your characters lives. Yet, this is how that precious half minute is spent. In terms of wise spending, that’s like putting a keepsake good luck quarter into a pay phone.

I shouldn’t complain too loudly, I suppose. This was at least an attempt at the humor portrayed in the early years of FOOB, when my hatred wasn’t yet white hot, but only categorized as simmering animosity.
gleeb
July 17th, 2008 at 11:45 am [Reply]

Jump Start: What strikes me is that he’s a cop. What has he been doing that he needs to wash his hands of?

’shaft: So, heart attack or head in the oven? I’m guessing the latter.

Curtis: Since when is Billingsley an animators’ union shop steward? This has been going on for days. Curtis’ sandwich is going to be stale.
hobbit
July 17th, 2008 at 11:47 am [Reply]

A3G- Why on earth is everyone in this supposedly “Eastern” market white?
Lake Eerie
July 17th, 2008 at 11:47 am [Reply]

MF – “Typical white person” is a slur? Sensitive much, Ducky?
A3G – Anyone else reminded of an old Far Side cartoon in which Edgar finally found his purpose? It was a blender-looking doohickey found in his couch. I thought I found my purpose on Route 66 in New Mexico earlier this year, but it was just green chili.
MW – Mary and Jeff’s heads don’t quite look right in that last panel, as if they were photo-shopped into a rom-com movie poster
PeteMoss
July 17th, 2008 at 11:50 am [Reply]

DT – What the hell is Tracy talking to in that last panel? That is freaking me out.
aloria
July 17th, 2008 at 11:51 am [Reply]

Zits: I certainly don’t recall it ever being that difficult for my mother to wake my brother or I. Jeremy’s mom might be prudent to check him for track marks.
Hogenmogen
July 17th, 2008 at 11:52 am [Reply]

Judge: You should renegotiate my book contract.
Sam: I don’t really know literary law.
Judge: You leave tomorrow!
Sam: I have a full schedule… court appearances.
Judge: I hear Phoenix is great this time of year!
Sam: July? It could be 112 degrees in the shade.
Judge: And don’t forget your golf bag!
Sam: I don’t play golf.
Judge: Ha ha, you’re such a kidder. I’m off to my vacation. Ta-ta!
Sam: Have you considered that I’m not the right guy for this? Judge? ….. Judge??
Muffaroo of the Outdated Meme Patrol
July 17th, 2008 at 11:57 am [Reply]

FW – I was scooped on my comment to Les (”It’s called ‘thinking.’”) so I’ll just point out that the colorists seem to be foreshadowing some interaction between Les and the blonde in the foreground. Maybe she has a cell phone!

S-M – You can sit this one out, Spidey. If the Vulture had really wanted you to see his challenge, he’d have bought an ad on “Oprah.”

Ces @18 – That’s an honor. I always thought Bizarro was worth looking at. Don’t let us down or we’ll, like, say snarky things about Sally Forth. Really!

Lake Eerie @27 – All good choices. I’ll regret asking, but who’s Bary? I like the tone of that line the best, but can’t say for sure until I know.

Osh-Jay: Appy-hay ecret-say 4th-3ay!
Muffaroo of the Outdated Meme Patrol
July 17th, 2008 at 11:59 am [Reply]

aloria @49 – I’ll be happy enough if she finds that he’s dead and that the “Z” balloon is just taped to the wall. (That is compatible with needle marks, of course.)
BenG
July 17th, 2008 at 12:01 pm [Reply]

SM: Seriously, why the hell is this comic still allowed to run in newspapers? Does it even have a fan base? Any fans of the character are most certainly more interested in the comic books, the movies or even the cheesy old cartoon show from the eighties.
No Boxcar, Slylock
July 17th, 2008 at 12:06 pm [Reply]

JP – Fortunately for Sam, a 24-hour time period to adjust his attitude means he has until approximately Valentine’s day to finish the book.
Lake Eerie
July 17th, 2008 at 12:07 pm [Reply]

51 Muffaroo:
“Bary” is actually “Barfy” – some day I will discover this thing known as preview …
Red Greenback
July 17th, 2008 at 12:11 pm [Reply]

Thorp: When E-Varg is shown in profile, he looks like this: Maybe he should go to France, where he’d be revered as a baseball genius!
Eric the Baker
July 17th, 2008 at 12:24 pm [Reply]

re: #44 – Hogenmogen: You have my vote for COTW. “In terms of wise spending, that’s like putting a keepsake good luck quarter into a pay phone.” What a great turn of phrase!
gkl
July 17th, 2008 at 12:24 pm [Reply]

MW: So white wine goes with orange chunks. You learn something every day.

Pluggers: Yeah! Fuck you, nature’s goodness!
rhymes with puck
July 17th, 2008 at 12:28 pm [Reply]

BB: It looks like Beetle’s talking out of his ass again!

Spider-man: Awww, the Vulture wants to have a play-date with Spidey…

A3G: Obviously the entire universe is disgusted by the idea that a man wants to marry Margo and forced destiny to hand Eric an anthrax-gram to give him an easier way out.

FW: Les and writing is sort of like Batiuk and humor – Batiuk has flirted with the idea of adding humor to his strip, but humor won’t give him the time of day.

Hagar: HAH! Isn’t that funny how she just told her daughter how unhappy her mom and dad are together?

Curtis: Well, if these guys worked on “The Emperor’s New Groove” they deserve everything that’s happened to them.
Muffaroo of the Outdated Meme Patrol
July 17th, 2008 at 12:29 pm [Reply]

Lake Eerie @55 – See what I mean? Obvious in retrospect — I knew I’d regret asking, because now I feel like a dolt. Anyway, with that said, that’s the line I like best. Just Jeffy, standing on the sidewalk, lost in front of his house.
Red Greenback
July 17th, 2008 at 12:35 pm [Reply]

Mark Trail: Middle panel caption-”C’mon, get the Jackball, that’s a good Rodan!”
Colinski
July 17th, 2008 at 12:36 pm [Reply]

You left out a member of that law firm. Isn’t it Dewey, Cheatem and Howe?
Big Sims
July 17th, 2008 at 12:37 pm [Reply]

Happy Birthday Josh! One year older – eh?*

Phantom – (sputters) But – but – we don’t work that way!

Really now. Do some research Mr Phantom. The USCG has had DF equipment for years now which can track even a very short transmission. Considering the jack-up rig ain’t moving and rig antenna height is typically high, the two factors that normally skew results are eliminated. In addition to this the rig’s position is charted, well known and probably used by fishers. With oil at $134.47 a barrel (at the time of this post) Andre can expect some roustabouts to come populate his rig shortly. Very few oil rigs are abandoned in the Gulf right now.
Wouldn’t Andre be suffering from scurvy? Where does he get his fresh veggies?

Note to all cartoonists (and TV show producers): Using Katrina and its resulting diaspora to introduce new characters is getting a little played out.

Big Sims, New Orleanian, Amateur Nutritionist, USCG Search and Rescue somewhere on the Gulf Coast.

*My Uncle used to say that to me on my birthday. I still don’t know how to answer.
Johnny Cat
July 17th, 2008 at 12:46 pm [Reply]

Happy Birthday, dude!
Amy
July 17th, 2008 at 12:46 pm [Reply]

Saw your secret message in my Google Reader – HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOSH!
Artist formerly known as Ben
July 17th, 2008 at 12:47 pm [Reply]

In the Parker snark, you say “where well on their way” but I think you mean “were on their way.”

Otherwise an above standard post in every whey.
Poteet
July 17th, 2008 at 12:56 pm [Reply]

S-M — “MEET VULTURE AT NOON.” Dang. I hoped that meant Spiderman’s fever was about to become fatal.
Poteet
July 17th, 2008 at 12:56 pm [Reply]

Happy Birthday, Josh!
Journeyman Softheart
July 17th, 2008 at 12:57 pm [Reply]

We interrupt your regularly scheduled snark for this moment of soft-heartedness.

FOOB: today was charming. This is the first time I’ve actually liked Anthony.

Phantom: I have really been enjoying the storyline of the insane, delusional would-be vigilante on the abandoned oil rig – it built up suspense, featured a brief fight more exciting than anything that has ever happened in Spider Man, and has showed that Ms. Phantom is clearly the brains of the outfit – Kit has a nicer butt and dives almost as well as she does, though.

Garfield: I mentally substituted “year 23″ for “third day,” “this strip” for “you,” and smiled at this.

FW: For a comic featuring a middle-aged, self-pitying failure wandering around a trade show muttering to himself in a metaphor – flirting – that only emphasizes his loneliness and alienation, this actually came close to being sort of funny.

RM: “Getting a speeding ticket in his driveway, I’ll call you back” made me laugh; or maybe it was watching Richard Nixon yell at that slab of cop. Rex displaying a dry, almost whimsical sense of humor while talking to the baffled Count Morgu has dramatically raised my estimate of his intellect and personality. Thank you, Woody Wilson.

MW: Respecting the identity and autonomy of someone with whom you are in a relationship is important, but Mary Worth is is an arrogant, self-righteous twat with the empathy of Bucky Katt and the self-centeredness of a gyroscope.

And Dr. Jeff is a pitiful doormat whose sense of self worth compares unfavorably to Les from Funky Winkerbean. Think about how sad that is.

This softheart thing only goes so far.
Artist formerly known as Ben
July 17th, 2008 at 1:05 pm [Reply]

#18 Ces
Great news. I’m looking forward to the Ces-ified Bizarro.

#45 gleeb,
Remember, per Lynn Johnston, that Robb Armstrong can only show 30 seconds of his characters’ lives at a time. There’s not enough time to show all the consfiscated and re-sold drugs, or the suspects shot “while trying to escape.”
Niall
July 17th, 2008 at 1:05 pm [Reply]

Wow, Josh! I for one am very happy at your switch to morning snark! I hope you can keep it up for a while. :) Or was that your birthday present to us?

Y139. Poteet: why thank you! :) Now, if I could only find someone willing… best would be someone who appreciated both. (Not doing both at once. It would make postings a little awkward.)

Y140. Poteet: heeheehee! Don’t worry, I knew what you meant. I was still a little flattered, since you’re intelligent and creative in your snark. ;)

Y142. bats :[ : I think the reason you make the concept of Mary Worth having sex unpalatable is not because she’s older, but because there’s absolutely no romance or warmth in the act possible by Mary. I’ve seen plenty of women older than me who are plenty attractive, but young or old, it’s all about the approach with the other person.

172. Tweeks: from various similar reactions to MG&G, I think I’ll add it to my daily Chron dose. That’s usually the reaction to my own jokes and puns. :) As for MC, that is indeed a fine waitress.. *ahem*

Y185. Bootsy: never talk with your mouth full. *grins and flees*

Y186. Hogenmogen: 78 days? Two months and change? It’s been that long… wow. I knew there was a reason I stopped reading SM: my sanity.

Y187. Dean Booth: but that strip for the New yorker is not funny… therefore it fills the mandate.

18. Ces: Wow, Bizarro is much bigger than Sally Forth. This can make or break you. No pressure. :) But still, quite an honour.

48. PeteMoss: I gave my guess yesterthread immediately after my reaction, which was quite audible in the apartment. (Several shades of “Gaaaah!!”) I agree with your assessment.

53. BenG: the cheesy cartoon SM was from the early 70s, actually. The 80s gave us Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends, introducing the X-men to the world at large on TV. Then there was the first 90s CGI Spider-Man, which sucked mahor cheese as it made me feel nauseous to watch. The 00s SM show was much better, from what I hear. Yes, he’s had a show in every decade…

59. rhymes with puck: I actually liked New Groove… but like or not like, most agree it was rather different than the other movies made in that period, at least.
man behind the curtain
July 17th, 2008 at 1:06 pm [Reply]

A3G — Six yards of red and gold silk. Don’t tell me, Eric plans on using the talents he has gleaned from Project Runway to disguise himself as a Tibetan Buddhist monk in order to rescue Tim. This ought to be good.
PeterW
July 17th, 2008 at 1:11 pm [Reply]

Open letter to Ray Billingsley:

I can’t stay quiet on Curtis anymore. I’m hoping, really hoping, that Curtis will get a snarky comment in tomorrow or Saturday, because this “artist’s” moanfest is unwarranted.

As a Disney stockholder, I must point out that Pixar only “Joined the fold” in the last year, though they started working with Disney years ago, in a “producer/distributor” role. Before and after Disney bought Pixar, Disney retained a separate Feature Animation department.

As a viewer of DVD special features, I can also say that Disney Feature Animation is innovating ways to keep their traditional animators around after the transition. They’ve set up workstations for them where they can draw rough animation, and the computer derives the model’s motion from that.

And as a man who understands how traditional animation works, I have to point out that it’s not “pure artistry.” For that, you want Fantasia. Disney turned its artists loose to create occasionally, but not that much.

Please, Mr. Billingsley, go back to your old, predictable plots about Gunk’s amazing Flyspeck Island items, or Curtis getting perennially rejected by Michelle, or Barry baiting Curtis into trouble. This attempt at a “reality” story is comically flat.
Joe Blevins
July 17th, 2008 at 1:22 pm [Reply]

I don’t know what’s going on in Stan Lee’s personal life, but the “Spider-Man” comic strip is definitely suffering from a deflated Peter.
QM
July 17th, 2008 at 1:22 pm [Reply]

Re: #18

Congrats, Ces!

It’ll be nice to get a week of Bizarros that are actually funny, as opposed to the usual unfunny, hyper-preachy, smug, self-righteous mostly dreck that Piraro belches out each day.
Joe Blevins
July 17th, 2008 at 1:26 pm [Reply]

Leave it to the Vulture to use the least efficient, most time-consuming form of text messaging ever. I like that he made the hyphen in “Spider-Man” but didn’t bother to include anything useful like, say, a location. What, did he run out of sky?
elyse
July 17th, 2008 at 1:29 pm [Reply]

today’s FOOB bothers me more than the usual amount. it’s not just the content, today, it’s the fact that it looks completely computer generated.
elyse
July 17th, 2008 at 1:30 pm [Reply]

i take that back, everything looks computer generated except the swirly squiggles above anthony’s head. nice squiggle work today, Lynn
Pozzo
July 17th, 2008 at 1:32 pm [Reply]

I haven’t yet gotten over the thought of a Mexican national named “Elmer,” and now they throw an unexpectedly-revived draft at me? Gil Thorp, you’re blowing my mind!
bats :[
July 17th, 2008 at 1:34 pm [Reply]

29. The PartySim: A man’s short sleeve shirt usually requires 2-1/2 yards of material, and that’s 45″ wide. There’s a good chance that this silk, particularly if it’s a patterned brocade (if you think of the type of fabric one of those tight-fitting “Dragon Lady” dresses takes), might not be more than 30″ wide. It’s a good bet that even if Eric envisions such a slim, just-below-the-knee Dragon-Lady style dress for Margo, it could easily take 6 yards of fabric.

A friend of mine had such a dress made in red silk for her own wedding dress. The fabric was hideously expensive, and she got “just enough.”
Duckman30
July 17th, 2008 at 1:35 pm [Reply]

MW – I know this a romantic, impromptu “make-up” dinner, but why are the eating Cheetos Puffs with a knife and fork?
Library Cat
July 17th, 2008 at 1:41 pm [Reply]

Happy Birthday Josh!
bats :[
July 17th, 2008 at 1:42 pm [Reply]

Yow! Happy Birthday, Josh! We’ll be having pizza at the Friends of the Library warehouse this evening, and while not necessarily in your honor, maybe I can find something “nice” for you (like another FC language tape…).
I’m a little sad, though, as I realized that if I’d been an unwed (or even wed) high school teen-age mother, Josh could’ve been my kid. Not that I’d mind having Josh as a kid…

So, to cheer myself up, I’ll just drive Dr. Andy crazy with Rex’s latest antics!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/9545446@N07/2677779686/sizes/o/
CanuckDownSouth
July 17th, 2008 at 1:46 pm [Reply]

MW wow, Jeff has just FOOBed.
UncleJeff
July 17th, 2008 at 1:49 pm [Reply]

Rex Morgan YMCA: Yowza! Mad Max looks like John McCain with dark hair!
And Mrs. Mad Max looks like Cindy McCain!
Bunnë, Official Comic Execrator
July 17th, 2008 at 1:54 pm [Reply]

#18 Ces – yaaaay, I too miss Medium Large, and by now I’ve forgotten most of the punchlines, so recycling is totally welcome.

Spiderman – panel one creeps me out; no matter how I look at it, it seems like I’m looking at the monitor from the wrong angle. It’s as though Peters facial features had been drawn onto a flat-fronted head-like object, and we are seeing it from the side.

Dilbert – In Which We Learn That Hot Coffee Can Reduce Breast Size
Smarmy Duke
July 17th, 2008 at 1:56 pm [Reply]

Sweet. The Gorton’s Fisherman gave Eric a 50 cents off coupon. He must’ve felt sorry for Eric for paying top dollar for that “finest silk in of all Asia”, which is probably available in any JoAnn fabrics store.
Bunnë, Official Comic Execrator
July 17th, 2008 at 1:56 pm [Reply]

Oh, and happy birthday Josh!
Blueberry
July 17th, 2008 at 1:59 pm [Reply]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOSH!

MW – does this mean the handcuffs stay in the doctor’s bag?
Josh
July 17th, 2008 at 2:01 pm [Reply]

#66 AFKAB — Oops, thanks! I fixed.

Josh
trey le parc
July 17th, 2008 at 2:02 pm [Reply]

Hey, CES!

When can we expect the long-awaited SF spinoff starring Sally’s Mom, Aunt Jackie and Faye?
lesles
July 17th, 2008 at 2:05 pm [Reply]

#46 hobbit – i suspect it’s for the same reason mary worth’s vietnam didn’t seem to have any vietnamese living there, and most locales in most newspaper strips look like they’re set in KKK enclaves – costs.

you see, the complex and unstable special inks and extra drawing time that would be necessary to properly depict an ethnically diverse world are just too prohibitively expensive. and as everyone in the world readily identifies internally with well-off 1st world anglos (it’s been well established that the white man stands as a universally accepted everyman cipher in all cultures), there’s no real need for such extravagence.

i am perplexed, however, as to why eric is able to order in yards rather than metres, with no degree of confusion upon the part of the stallholder, and as to why alec guiness is wandering around eastern markets when he’s meant to be dead.
DAS
July 17th, 2008 at 2:09 pm [Reply]

FOOB: Anthony decides to preemptively give all the pedos in the park a glimpse up his daughter’s jumper. Father of the year, folks! – The Might Monarch

Also, my uncle once swung my brother around like that. Everything was fine until my brother experienced a shoulder subluxation. Everything was still fine as the situation was easily fixed … but still, it’s not something we’d want to go through again.

*

So the Forth’s have declared war on Christmas then? Sally forbids Christmas to Hilary who then decides to celebrate Hanukkah instead? Next thing you know, the Forths will become evil, secular Hollywood elitists supporting the atheist, communist Jihad … and they’ll influence millions of readers to do the same. Why does ‘Ces hate America?

Either that or Hilary will fall so in love with Hanukah that she’ll convert to Judaism and marry some guy named Hilary Steinbergowitz (religious name: Hillel ben Shlomo) and there’ll be confusion all around (especially if Huntch’s theory about the connection between the two S4th strips turns out to be true).
Eats Shoots And Leaves
July 17th, 2008 at 2:13 pm [Reply]

MW – July 17: Only in Charterstoneland could weeks of heinously selfish, inconsiderate behavior be rationalized as feminism.
Islamorada Girl
July 17th, 2008 at 2:13 pm [Reply]

Happy Birthday, Josh! When you and The Lovely Amber come across the bridge, the soft crabs my treat!
Sheila Sternwell
July 17th, 2008 at 2:17 pm [Reply]

#18 Ces – Very exciting! Thanks for the heads up.

Josh – Happy birthday! You don’t look a day over 50!
strawberrymom22
July 17th, 2008 at 2:17 pm [Reply]

Mary Worth: “I am my own woman.” Well, what does that say about the rest of us?

I was going to ask if anyone thought Jeremy was dead but, unfortunately, there is a “Z” bubble over his head. It’s alive.
Islamorada Girl
July 17th, 2008 at 2:20 pm [Reply]

GT: If Elmer Vargas really wants to learn Spanish, he should do it the way I did: watching telenovelas on Univision. Soon he’ll be so hooked on the woes of Iris y Diego, he won’t want to leave sunny Mexico, let alone the living room.

Death! Death to Gil Thorp!
Thank you.
spike
July 17th, 2008 at 2:22 pm [Reply]

Natal Day Felicitations, Josh!

Many thanks for the JP snark. I really miss reading those five-year-plan projections that came out as soon as the most recent five-year-plan celebrations had concluded. *Sigh!*

#34 Jeffster: Kudos for tying in Mao’s “Little Red Book” to the above mix. Well done!

Crankshaft: If Rose stayed alone at the house for “one last night” (in a presumably empty house, no less), who found her and phoned EMS and police? I was <i.soooo looking forward to those bi-weekly Rose/Ed exchanges.
One-eyed Wolfdog
July 17th, 2008 at 2:23 pm [Reply]

GT, Panel 4: “Son… you god-damned ninny… draft notices don’t come with Ed McMahon’s picture on the envelope.”
Perky Bird
July 17th, 2008 at 2:24 pm [Reply]

A3G: Judging by the pile of pastels I see behind the merchant, I think this particular market stall must have supplied all of Sonny Crockett’s blazer fabric needs.

And red and gold fabric, Eric? No, no, no! Haven’t you heard that teal and lavender are this year’s “in” colors for weddings?
UntrodTripod
July 17th, 2008 at 2:25 pm [Reply]

Today’s Momma confuses and arouses me. Wait, that’s every day.
Harpa
July 17th, 2008 at 2:30 pm [Reply]

A3G: Am I the only one who thought of the show “Avenue Q” when I read this?
One-eyed Wolfdog
July 17th, 2008 at 2:33 pm [Reply]

MW: “I appreciate your saying that. But… oh, look! Quarter past the hour. Somebody better get down on all fours and polish my sensible shoes again right now if he ever wants another helping of yellow… things… with yellow stuff. Bark for me, Jeff. Bark for me like Chester used to do.”
BenG
July 17th, 2008 at 2:34 pm [Reply]

71Niall- Yeah I know about the other cartoons (In fact you seem to be forgetting the non-CG one from the nineties. That one rocked.), I was just highlighting the cheesy old (70’s) cartoon as a vain stab at humor.
Howabominable (aka Lindsey ^_^)
July 17th, 2008 at 2:34 pm [Reply]

It’s pretty obvious that A-3g is in the same world as Mary Worth in that there are no Asians in Asia. I do like the author’s attempt at adding some sort of mystical adventure into Asia where mysterious holy men aid some random art collecter from the US in his magical journey to enlightenment. It’s almost like the writer wants to write something cool and interesting… but gets about halfway through the panel and says, “Screw it, I’m taking a nap.”

I have noticed that the artist is trying to draw Eric differently from Alan, which is a little bit of effort I guess.

Now, back to Mary Worth. Damn, Jeff got put in his place. “I will never ever encourage you to try to improve upon your faults ever again, Mary. The only one in this relationship with problems is ME, and I understand that now, o holy one.” Jeff got beaten HARD. But I will persevere. One of these days Jeff will stand up to Mary without crawling back to her like an emasculated puppy. One of these days. I don’t care if it takes a hundred storylines!
Phred22
July 17th, 2008 at 2:39 pm [Reply]

S-M: Poor Spidey. When he starts swinging around the city at noon, he’ll miss the TV news broadcast announcing how the cops staked out the three businesses which rented aerial smoke machines and arrested the Vulture when he came back at 10:30.
PeteyLock
July 17th, 2008 at 2:39 pm [Reply]

And because it hasn’t been posted yet, images of MaryJane that will restore your fanboy love in her: http://www.digitalfuntown.com/
different anonymous
July 17th, 2008 at 2:46 pm [Reply]

Just HOW is the Vulture doing that sky-writing, anyway? Let’s see, to create a visible ‘contrail’ he’d have to fly along leaving a warm moist gas in his wake…EEEEWWWW. Let’s hope Peter Parker’s nose is still stuffed up from his cold.
Sully
July 17th, 2008 at 2:47 pm [Reply]

Re Gil Thorp:

What’s Jerry Mathers doing in the foreground of panel 1?
PeteMoss
July 17th, 2008 at 2:47 pm [Reply]

MW – Dr. Cory, I know Mary referred to those yellow globules as “scampi,” but in reality she is only feeding you the last remnants of your shriveling, pathetic pride. How does that taste?

Sure, Jeff, Mary is “her own woman,” and you are her own eunich. But I don’t want to bring down the festive mood here. Enjoy yourself! Ooh, is that a bowl of Cap’t Crunch on the table? Yum!
Niall
July 17th, 2008 at 2:51 pm [Reply]

105. BenG: I’ve stopped really watching much TV in the early 90s, so yeah, I probably forgot a few. So many choices!

Unlike live-action, where you have the Japanese and, if it’s not a youtube-only joke, the Italian.
PeteMoss
July 17th, 2008 at 2:52 pm [Reply]

Ziggy thinks he be pimp, but he’s just frontin’.
gh
July 17th, 2008 at 2:53 pm [Reply]

#83 bats :[ --

They are always fun, but this one, this one should be frescoed on the wall of a cathedral in Milan for the ages to admire.

And how does everyone know it's Josh's birthday? [Happy birthday, Josh! Have some buttercream frosting!]
One-eyed Wolfdog
July 17th, 2008 at 2:57 pm [Reply]

Hey, hang on. Hang on. Something is wrong on the internet.

#59 – The Emperor’s New Groove rocks. Totally bust-a-gut funny, funnier than anything else Disney ever made. If I had to choose, in some quite unfathomable circumstances, a single desert-island Disney flick, it’d be a toss up between the llama movie (funny? my word!) and Robin Hood (sentimental value); most of the rest of ‘em go hang (I’m not really too much on the Pixar bandwagon, either). Bah!
Bootsy
July 17th, 2008 at 2:57 pm [Reply]

Big Sims! I was wondering if you were going to give old Andre Dupierre a call on the whole “The Coast Guard is out to get me!” thing. And I must agree wholeheartedly with the Katrina storyline thing. I wrote something similar the other day that perhaps fellow snarkers would have taken as mean-spirited toward those affected by The Thing if they did not know that we locals sometimes get tired of it used as a plot device because we’re still living with it every day!

Niall, # 71, of course a lady would never talk with her mouth full! No sense talking during a “pleasant eat” anyway since the recipient is not really listening to me, if you know what I mean. (and I think you do!)
One-eyed Wolfdog
July 17th, 2008 at 2:59 pm [Reply]

None of that changes the fact that the strangely pyramidal dude working in “Happy Subs” is pretty much a tool, but still.
banana
July 17th, 2008 at 3:00 pm [Reply]

#76 – COTW!!
Dr. Weird
July 17th, 2008 at 3:05 pm [Reply]

#18 Ces Neat! Does this mean when you go on vacation or a crime-fighting spree, Piraro will draw Sally Forth?

#98 Islamorada Girl GT may have its flaws, but at least the characters get outside for healthy exercise fairly often. It isn’t Spider-Man, after all!
man behind the curtain
July 17th, 2008 at 3:09 pm [Reply]

#92 lesles -Yards, meters, it doesn’t really matter. He’s going to give the stupid American whatever amount he feels like cutting for the price he’s getting.
Cranked Shaft
July 17th, 2008 at 3:11 pm [Reply]

I can’t wait until tomorrow,s Crankshaft, where we find mama hanging from the pipes in the basement with a not pinned to her saying, “I told you you would never be able to take my home away from me.”
saxman
July 17th, 2008 at 3:11 pm [Reply]

Crankshaft:

I’m betting a burglar came back to steal the zillion dollars worth of comics, and G’Mom clocked him with a two by four.
man behind the curtain
July 17th, 2008 at 3:13 pm [Reply]

A3G — The reason it appears that there are no Asians in Tibet has to do with some kind of parallel universe sort of thing. Either we see everyone through Eric’s eyes and he sees everyone as being like himself, or Eric is also Asian and in fact all of the characters are Asians. (except maybe Tenzin who is really an American tourist)
Cedar
July 17th, 2008 at 3:13 pm [Reply]

Re: Gil

I think by “drafted,” he means “scouted”

http://chicagosports.chicagotribune.com/sports/custom/gilthorp/cs-080630gilthorpgallery,1,7456595.cartoongallery

Third strip down
hobbit
July 17th, 2008 at 3:14 pm [Reply]

#81 Duckman 30- It’s because Mary Worth eats eveything with a knife and fork. Including your soul! Mwa ha ha ha ha!
saxman
July 17th, 2008 at 3:17 pm [Reply]

Phantom

More information on abandoned offshore oil rigs can be found on the Internet.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A42189-2005Apr10.html
Deena in OR
July 17th, 2008 at 3:27 pm [Reply]

Hey, Josh!

…from all of us-if I can speak for you all…

http://www.americangreetings.com/ecards/view.pd?i=469982364&m=2179&source=ag992
commodorejohn
July 17th, 2008 at 3:28 pm [Reply]

A3G – “‘EASTMOST PENINSULA IS THE SECRET?’ What the hell?”

AS – You know, DC Comics probably has grounds for a lawsuit here, because after looking at today’s atrocity, anybody but the most die-hard fan would be turned off Wonder Woman for life. (And naturally, the joke is rife with extra wordage that kills the impact.)

BS – A war-painted Brenda deprives us of a fine Darwin Award candidate.

Crankshaft – That’s right, you fucker: you killed her. Enjoy your ~~new~~ life of miserable self-loathing.

Curtis – And by “pure artists” he most likely means “bitchy old codgers who couldn’t be induced to touch a computer at gunpoint.” This is such bullshit.

DT – “BY THE WAY HAVE I MENTIONED YET THAT I HAVE FIGURED OUT YOUR SECRET WELL I JUST THOUGHT YOU SHOULD KNOW.”

FC – That hilariously weary expression on Jeffy’s face speaks volumes about his previous dodgeball experiences.

FOOB – Francie has apparently aged during the spin, putting the validity of relativity in Foobland into dispute. Also she’s wearing the same kind of clothing that makes April a horrible little tramp.

GT – Is that Amaryllis from The Music Man?

Luann – I can’t wait to see the letters pour in from readers who missed the previous three-plus days of storyline.

MC – Cute waitress alert!

RMMD – Jay Homunculus: Traffic Cop!
Art Vandelay
July 17th, 2008 at 3:30 pm [Reply]

Crankshaft could transform magically from a horrible, soul-sucking, unfunny nightmare into a pretty cool comic if only it turns out that the old lady has been murdered by Crankshaft, and then he gets sentenced to death and electrocuted.

Hmm, what stupid pun could they have him muttering as the switch is thrown? “Well, I’m not surprised that being on death row stinks. It’s really not at all… shocking.” BZZZZT! And then he’s dead! And everyone rejoices. And the strip continues day after day, depicting his adventures in Hell. But no one really notices much of any difference.

Instead: it will turn out that the old bag killed herself, or dropped dead, or more likely is incapacitated but on life support and will be a long-term emotional and financial drain on everyone else for years to come.

And do you know why that happened? Because that married couple had one night of SEX, and sex = deathand/or pain and guilt and misery. Not just for the sexers, even married sexers, but for all of those close to them. Death, pain, misery and guilt to all! Ha ha, that Crankshaft sure is a good “comic” strip.
rhymes with puck
July 17th, 2008 at 3:41 pm [Reply]

#115 Wolf-dog: One person’s classic is another’s “check your watch five times and begin praying for the movie to end”. But then again saying your two favorite Disney movies are Emperor’s New Groove and Robin Hood is like saying your two favorite comic strips are Garfield and Momma.
Hogenmogen
July 17th, 2008 at 3:42 pm [Reply]

I’m trying to figure out what the hell Phantom’s story line is about. I think I’m missing something. Dupierre’s oil rig is the Gilligan’s Isle of oil rigs and despite its remote and isolated location, manages a celbrity visit once per week.

And what is this crap about “so you can triangulate my position.” You’re on an oil rig. It’s huge, it’s metal, it’s in open water and someone spent a hundred million dollars to put it there. Did you think you’re invisible?

And, I’ve been reading BC. When Hart passed away my local rag dumped the strip like a soiled condom. They got angry letters of course, but I was quite pleased. Hart’s later stuff ranged from routine gimmick to bland to indecipherable to bat shit insane. I always welcome the addition of new comics. However, the new BC is actually not half bad. This, in contrast with a new-fangled Marvin the toddler breaking up with his binky for the tenth consecutive day.
commodorejohn
July 17th, 2008 at 3:45 pm [Reply]

#130 rhymes with puck – You take that back or I’ll call down Chennux on you!
DAS
July 17th, 2008 at 3:49 pm [Reply]

Momma — I live in a government bond supported apartment complex in a bad spot of a medium sized (and hence presumably not that expensive) city — and I pay more than $480/month in rent.

Where does Francis live that his rent is so low?

Luann: is it legal to depict teenage cameltoe?

MW: How old is MW supposed to be? She and Jeff are talking as if they came of age (and got their cues about feminism by) watching 1930s era commedies of remarriage. That would make them, what, in their 80s? I’d believe it about Mary, but if Jeff is even 80 — wow! he looks young for his age! What’s a successful phyisician (although Jeff could be the Nick Riviera of Santa Royale, for all we know) who looks that good for his age doing with the Royal Meddler (or better Medlar) of Charterstone?
T. Chicana
July 17th, 2008 at 3:54 pm [Reply]

Great idea #129 Art Vandelay! As Crankshaft was just about to get electrocuted and the volts were climbing up, he could say, “I can see why they call this chair ‘Old Sparky!’”

Actually, here in Ohio, we have lethal injection, so there would have to be some pun about that…

That would make the strip worth reading!

Really, if this is a stroke or something for the nasty mother, I will be so annoyed. Just more misery. If she IS dead, then at least they got to savor her unpleasant demeanor one last time as they sold the house out from under her.

This old bat’s ghost will probably come back and say she doesn’t like the headstone, and that her bones are drying out too quick!

Boy is this a morbid comment! That’s what Batty-ick will do to you.
Rachel
July 17th, 2008 at 4:01 pm [Reply]

“Luann: is it legal to depict teenage cameltoe?”

Hmmm…..no, no I think that it is now offically no-pants-week for the comics started by Irving. I guess she is just hanging out on the couch with really high boots and a shirt.

Man, no wonder TJ is sitting so close to her.
Cranky
July 17th, 2008 at 4:02 pm [Reply]

As Warren Oates so memorably put it in Stripes, “Son, there ain’t no draft no more.”
Bootsy
July 17th, 2008 at 4:12 pm [Reply]

# 131 Hogenmogen. I’m with ya. I still don’t know who this guy’s enemies are! The other day I was thinking FEMA or maybe Mayor Nagin, but Andre Dupierre can’t be pissed at the Coast Guard. Nobody hates Coasties, do they? So I’m still bemused and I’m not even getting to see the striped ass either! That would at least make reading this storyline a little more palatable.
lesles
July 17th, 2008 at 4:16 pm [Reply]

#112 Niall – italian spiderman is actually a parody of 60s/70s italian action movies. started as a project by a couple of film students in adelaide, and they kept adding episodes as they could fund them, til it got to where it is now. they’re trying to swing things to get enough resources to make a it into a feature.
Andy Panderer
July 17th, 2008 at 4:21 pm [Reply]

Curtis – this sandwich making guy looks old enough to have worked on such Disney “masterpieces” as “The Fox and The Hound” and “The Black Cauldron.” In that case he should be praising C’thulu that he has a job, let alone be allowed to live.
Andy Panderer
July 17th, 2008 at 4:22 pm [Reply]

BTW – Happy BD Josh, you young whippersnapper you!
Crankenstank
July 17th, 2008 at 4:25 pm [Reply]

Jeez la-wheeze, Josh, if you think 34 is old, you’re in for some really unpleasant surprises in the next decade or so…

Happy ho hos. I lost count right around your age and am somewhere between you and John McCain’s dendrochronologically-determined age.
spike
July 17th, 2008 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

#134 T. Chicana: If Baht-yook wants to have an electric chair in Ohio, there will be an electric chair in Ohio. Reality be damned!
Daily Comics Reviewer
July 17th, 2008 at 4:44 pm [Reply]

Josh’s one-liner: A disertation length critique without proper punctuation.

Seriously, how is spider-man going to find the vulture at noon? It’s not like they have a super hero/villain cage match ring in New York City.
Art Vandelay
July 17th, 2008 at 4:46 pm [Reply]

Crankshaft on Death Row: As the executioner prepares the syringe for his lethal injection, Crankshaft looks around bitterly, mumbling “This place sure is grim. Why doesn’t somebody INJECT a little humor around here?”

And then they stick him with the needle and he dies! Haha, truly, the funniest Crankshaft ever!
Anna
July 17th, 2008 at 4:53 pm [Reply]

Happy birthday Josh!! 34 is definitely not old. Surely you’ll be alive for another 5, maybe even 6 years.
A White Bear
July 17th, 2008 at 4:57 pm [Reply]

I hate to be a stickler about this, but in the book The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, Dorothy shows absolutely zero courage, loyalty, or initiative, and in fact defeats all her enemies by accident. More like Spider-Man than we’d like to think?
Gold-Digging Nanny
July 17th, 2008 at 5:02 pm [Reply]

Happy birthday, Josh!
commodorejohn
July 17th, 2008 at 5:04 pm [Reply]

#139 Andy Panderer – Let us not forget that breathtaking masterpiece of children’s cinema, Pete’s Dragon! I bet he painted every cel in that thing by hand, uphill, in the snow!
Jude
July 17th, 2008 at 5:06 pm [Reply]

You know, I have a solid appreciation for cell drawn animation. As far as I’m concerned, Beauty and the Beast is the greatest animated movie ever, cgi or otherwise. But I have to say, this Curtis storyline is waaaay past tiresome.
Howabominable (aka Lindsey ^_^)
July 17th, 2008 at 5:07 pm [Reply]

#73 PeterW – And it’s not like Disney doesn’t use animation artists anymore. There are still plenty of animated cartoons and movies being released. Yes, I’m sure they have computers do more of the work, but come on – if you’re unwilling to upgrade your job skills, why should you keep your job? Take some training classes and learn to use these programs to animate. That way your value to Disney will double – you will still be able to animate traditionally, but can still function in a world that increasingly uses computers and CGI to create movies. If you’re unwilling to adapt, you’re a moron and shouldn’t be in the business. I don’t see Disney just saying, “Sorry, we’re only doing Pixar movies from now on so you’re fired.”
lesles
July 17th, 2008 at 5:13 pm [Reply]

don’t listen to them, josh. 34 is old. old!

it’s where you start looking back in bitterness at your youthful dreams of having one of the greatest blogs in the history of the universe that would attract hundreds of comments by a vast range of witty and wonderful people from all around the world for every post and being adored by the internets, and you realise it was all just an unachievable fantasy that could never be and you regret all the time you wasted on it that could have been spent taking holidays.

34 … bitter like ashes, i tell you. not those sweet ashes with that slight bitterness as an undernote that pleasantly contrasts the sweetness, but those really bitter ones that taste like quinine.

everything after that’s pretty cool, though.
Andy Panderer
July 17th, 2008 at 5:16 pm [Reply]

#148 – …uphill, in the snow, BOTH WAYS!!

Disney has even re-opened their short cartoon division – there was a pretty good Goofy cartoon that played before the wretched “National Treasure 2.”

Pyramid shaped animator guy should easily have found a job at Film Roman, rather than Subway.
tuna
July 17th, 2008 at 5:20 pm [Reply]

leave josh alone!!! i know people that are in their 90’s so shut it. any way, what’s with the creepy guy picking up people’ destinies?
Mariko
July 17th, 2008 at 5:31 pm [Reply]

MF– Hey, guys, guess what? Obama once used the phrase “typical white person” when talking about his grandmother. Isn’t that scandalous? Let’s pepper comic strips with it for the next few months!

Curtis– Why does Billingsley feel the need to send a big “fuck you” to computer animators? Sure, I don’t think that Disney’s decision to discontinue doing hand-animated movies was the greatest, but Pixar has done some pretty great, artistic work. As cool as the underwater scenes in “The Little Mermaid” were, for example, they didn’t reach the beautiful expansiveness of “Finding Nemo.”

I am, however, entertained by the idea of a fantasy sub-shop employee who stops to tell customers his “tragic” tale. It would be fun with different past employments, too.
“Do you like those new space shuttles?”
“Yeah, they’re pretty cool.”
“Well, I hate ‘em. I worked on the old Saturn V rockets. Then they came along with all these ideas about reusable spacecraft and forced all of us true rocket makers out of business.”
or
“I hate these new dentists. I was a dentist, you know–and a goddamn good one at that! Then they come along with all this “Novocaine” and “painless drilling” bullshit, and drive true dentists out of work!”

Yeah, I know they’re not the best examples, and not comparable to the plight of animators . . . but still.
Violet
July 17th, 2008 at 5:35 pm [Reply]

Okay, Mr. Billingsley, we totally get that you have a problem with Disney and computer animation. Really, we do. Why you have chosen an obese Walter Cronkite in Bavarian drag with a Tommie the Tweaker ponytail as your mouthpiece is less clear.
Niall
July 17th, 2008 at 5:45 pm [Reply]

116. Bootsy: if I answer in any direction, I shall regret it, so will others for the TMI. :)

139. Andy Panderer: I actually like Black Cauldron, and I can boast(?) to have been one of the few to have seen it in cinemas on its release. And kept the flame alive that it did happen when Disney was rather silent on its existence. It’s bleak, it’s the last gasp of the old guard… and I once met the animator for Gurgi at a local “meet a Real Disney Animator!” thing in teh basement of the local The Bay store. During umpteenth Mickeys and Donalds, I was looking around at the drawings on display, done by him, which included Black Cauldron in a couple of places – and it was amazingly obvious that he had done Gurgi, as he was the only character on-model. So I was last, smiled and asked for a Gurgi sketch. You wouldn’t believe the smile he got. He took his time, chatted amiably, and I still have the framed sketch somewhere in my apartment. I should look it up to see the name.
mikey
July 17th, 2008 at 5:50 pm [Reply]

Slylock: R. Kelly has finally made that difficult transition from real life to the comics page; in elephant form.
Ross
July 17th, 2008 at 6:16 pm [Reply]

Is it just me, or is it weird that Pluggers comes out with a tomato comic right when the FDA clears tomatoes for public consumption?
One-eyed Wolfdog
July 17th, 2008 at 6:23 pm [Reply]

The thing about the llama movie is that it’s very un-Disney-like, so if you like their usual run of (imo tedious eye-rolling faux-sentimental schmaltzy sing-song highly derivative but what do I know, ymmv) works, it’s no surprise it wouldn’t be your cup of tea. And conversely. See, for me, cartoon nirvana = Chuck Jones. And ENG = very nearly Looney Toons, hence doubleplus awesome.

About The Black Cauldron, I only say I loved the books so much I found the movie to be a rather frustrating fumble. Also as a young wolfpup I was rather frightened by the cauldron born up on the big screen.

And if you don’t like Robin Hood, then… gosh. I can only congratulate you on your mastery of English because I imagine it must have been difficult for someone from whatever barren communist life-despising antimatter-based galaxy you come from.
One-eyed Wolfdog
July 17th, 2008 at 6:25 pm [Reply]

Well, what I meant to say there was more or less “to each his own” but sometimes my fingers take over and I am not typing the exact words that I’m thinking.
commodorejohn
July 17th, 2008 at 6:37 pm [Reply]

#159 One-Eyed Wolfdog – Preach it.
Aesop
July 17th, 2008 at 6:44 pm [Reply]

So, the Vulture’s big plan at the airfield was skywriting a message to Spider-man? Wow, this comic is really running out of ideas.
Talking Squirrel
July 17th, 2008 at 6:49 pm [Reply]

GT: I see the guy with the yarmulke and payesses followed El-Mair down south of the border and is warming up in the on-deck circle. In a moment El-Mair is gonna lace one between the right and center fielders, ending up on third with the game-tying run — and oy-boy is gonna dribble another one back to the pitcher for the final out.

#154 Mariko: “As cool as the underwater scenes in “The Little Mermaid” were, for example, they didn’t reach the beautiful expansiveness of “Finding Nemo.”

True enough — but then, computers don’t get disgruntled and draw a prominent palace phallus on the Little Mermaid videocassette cover, thereby creating an instant ebay classic.
Sally Villarreal
July 17th, 2008 at 7:09 pm [Reply]

“Purpose”? Is that like Steve Martin’s “special purpose” in The Jerk? Is there an an aphrodisiac in that envelope?
Muffaroo of the Outdated Meme Patrol
July 17th, 2008 at 7:13 pm [Reply]

T. Chicana @134 – A “Crankshaft” joke about lethal injection? “This could be exactly the shot in the arm this strip needs!”

Niall @156 – I saw The Black Cauldron in the theater too, and though the moving-background flying shot seemed impressive at the time, the rest of the movie… well, I could believe Darth Vader was dangerous, because he did bad things to people and planets. The guy in TBC was just all “Fear my hideous countenance, pathetic fools!” “Well, okay. After all, you’re ugly.”

One-eyed Wolfdog @159 – The llama movie was kinda fun, I thought, but I was older than 10 when Disney’s Robin Hood came out, so I’ll just agree that it’s better than Disney the Pooh, or Blinky the Friendly Hunchback and his Get-Along Gang.
rhymes with puck
July 17th, 2008 at 7:29 pm [Reply]

159 – I’m sure I could give a passionate dissertation as to why I didn’t like ‘the llama movie’ if it wasn’t for the fact that I threw it in as a joke because it was pretty much the nail in the traditional animation coffin for Disney. All I remember about it was that I was bored and that is was slapsticky. Not Chuck Jones-brilliant slapsticky though.

As for Robin Hood, it’s not that I don’t like it, it just doesn’t compare to Fantasia, Snow White, or given the source of this little discussion The Incredibles or Toy Story.

I am from a communist life-despising antimatter-based galaxy, though, so good catch there. I’m just here to spy on Chennux and offend people by not liking the movies they do.
Jamus The Bartender
July 17th, 2008 at 7:32 pm [Reply]

9CL: Damn. That’s exactly what Edda once told me in panel 3. Unlike me, it seems like Claudio doesn’t wear a raincoat.
Luann: Okay, creepy, but my attention was drawn to the magazine, “Glam-O” , that Luann’s reading. Is “Glam-O” a subsidiary of “Whamm-o”, who used to make frisbees?
DAS
July 17th, 2008 at 7:38 pm [Reply]

computers don’t get disgruntled and draw a prominent palace phallus – Talking Squirrel

That’s some good internal rhyme, there — are you a poet and you don’t even know it?

OTOH, I don’t buy the premise of this remark. Why can’t computers get disgruntled (are they on perma-gruntle?)? I know my computer at work is disgruntled quite often? E.g. it causes various programs to quit at random times and adds random delays to all calculations.

How long before the AJGLU3000 becomes disgruntled and decides to add a phallus to an otherwise “innocent” Archie comic?
Trekkie
July 17th, 2008 at 7:40 pm [Reply]

Ah, the Major League Baseball Amateur Draft…where thousands of kids find out just how quickly their dream of playing pro ball gets crushed.

Jimmy probably got drafted by the Pittsburgh Pirates (Motto: “Now in year 9 of our 5-year rebuilding plan!”). Kinda like being sent to the baseball equivalent of Siberia.
PeteMoss
July 17th, 2008 at 7:43 pm [Reply]

I nominate lesles to deliver a toast at Elizabeth’s and Anthony’s Foobtuals. Let’s give that grand occassion this (see #151) kind of perspective.
bats :[
July 17th, 2008 at 7:45 pm [Reply]

Yikes! I’ve been staring at Panel 2 of GT (which has been staring back at me), and I’ve come to the realization that Jimmy Hughes, with his wavy blonde hair and tilt to his head, is a medieval religious icon! I’m not sure if he’s actually St. Michael or St. Gabriel, but I’m leaning toward the latter, since Gabriel is a messenger.
I don’t think that the phone was part of his original angel kit, though…
Jamus The Bartender
July 17th, 2008 at 7:52 pm [Reply]

The Cat And The Curmudgeon
Trainwreck: Prelude Pt. 3

Mrs Thurston was in the kitchen making another pot of coffee while I was in the living room with Thirsty.
“Here we go. I’m sorry about all the beer cans, Mr The Bartender.”
“No, problem, Mrs. T. And it’s just Jamus.” Handing Thirsty a cup of joe, I started in again.
“Okay, Thirsty, here’s the thing. I told an ex of mine that I was gonna tend bar at her wedding. In Canada. Gratis. That’s either greek or latin for free. With me so far?”
“Hic” answered Thirsty.
“Yeah…um, anyway, I was gonna go up alone, but the ex sent me and …Cassandra….an invite just in case. Anyway, Cassandra got the invite, and now she’s picking out dresses. ”
“Hic” nodded Thirsty.
“See me and the Cat have been having problems of late, but now that she’s got the invite, she’s all excited. And I can’t take her to the wedding AND keep her sticky fingers away from the guests AND tend bar at the same time. ”
“Hic”
“This is where you come in. Now, i’m gonna pay for a round trip ticket to Canada, ” I said, pulling out the Amtrak ticket, “PLUS, four hundred bucks out of my own pocket. I usually make two hundred and tips on a thing like this. I hope this gives you an indication of how important this is. Whaddya say, huh Thirsty? Thirsty.”
Thirsty answered me in a long snore.
“Relax, he’ll be there.” said Mrs. Thurston. ” Gimme a chance go take all the beer cans to the recycling center. There’s at least two hundred bucks worth here….”
To Be Continued.
Jordan
July 17th, 2008 at 7:56 pm [Reply]

Reading today’s installment, I wonder if the ultimate Gil Thorp artist would be 90’s Image Comics founder Rob Liefeld. This strip is full of Liefeld’s trademarks.

- Bodies twisted into impossible poses

- Feathery hair that never touches anybody’s ears

- Hands that look like they aren’t actually gripping anything (check out that phone)

- Ears that have the lobes parallel to the eyes

And panel 3 has a definite Liefeld shout-out: a person walking with their arms splayed out, like they’re walking an invisible tightrope. Man, they need to hire Liefeld for this strip. Everybody would have ridiculous bulges and pouches all over their bodies, everybody’s faces would be cross-hatched to the point of being unrecognizable, and you’d never see anybody’s feet. EVER.

Although why Elmer is playing baseball with a midget rabbi is beyond my ability to explain with all this.
Poteet
July 17th, 2008 at 7:56 pm [Reply]

Foob — Could some long-suffering Foobmeister Mudge please remind me again of just how old Francie is supposed to be? And if I forget and ask again, please feel free to whack my head really hard. Thank you.
Harold
July 17th, 2008 at 7:58 pm [Reply]

Happy Birthday, Josh!

And Batuik visited his characters with a Josh’s Birthday Special of death, or at least misery, fear, and stress. Who could ask for more?
commodorejohn
July 17th, 2008 at 7:59 pm [Reply]

#166 rhymes with puck – Actually, a lot of the better humor in TENG is the dry, snarky kind. The slapstick’s not bad, but it’s the other stuff that really shines. Also, call me a Philistine if you want, but Snow White has to be just about the weakest of the “classic” Disney films. Granted, there’s obviously a ton of care put into it, but the plot is even more backwards and dated than the 1940s Betty Crocker character designs. (Although I admit a fair bit of my venom probably comes from its having established quite a few of the awful “screechy songs and cutesy forest creatures” cliches that dominated American animation for forty-plus years and still linger like an unwelcome college acquaintance.)
PeteMoss
July 17th, 2008 at 8:01 pm [Reply]

Phantom – I can completely sympathize with Andre’s plight here because I’ve got the exact, same problem. Only instead of it being the US Coast Guard tracking me it’s the Paragon Cable Company. And instead of an oil rig in the gulf, it’s a double-wide by the river. And instead of being besieged by criminal invaders, its Jehovah’s Witnesses and the Girl Scouts of America. And…and instead of being displaced by a natural disaster, I was displaced by Mom and Dad who said it was time for me to go out into the world and get a job all because I’m older than Fruhlinger. Like I said, it’s almost the exact same situation completely. Oh the injustice of it all, Andre! You and me, man! We’ll never give up!
AeroSquid
July 17th, 2008 at 8:03 pm [Reply]

Today’s Non-Sequitor Mark Trail !

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3088/2678689002_67df4c750d_o.jpg

The Whole Damn Comic Parody Stream !

http://www.flickr.com/photos/9026046@N04/
Dingo
July 17th, 2008 at 8:10 pm [Reply]

Bitter Cold

This was her home. For fifty-two years she cooked in its kitchen, watched fireflies in the back yard, and sodomized herself with a hairbrush in its bathroom. It wasn’t the best house on the block but it belonged to her. How many nights had she sat in the living room watching Uncle Miltie? How many times did she cover her ears as her husband beat their son in the basement cage? And now, it was gone. Gone as much as a Bush administration but with less lingering bitterness.

Her son was grown now. Married to a shrew. The milk had dried in her teat and he ventured off to another pasture, leaving her with nothing but manure. She tripped constantly. It was the aftermath for taking a bullet in the hip for President Ford. The walls were closing in on her and the world became nothing but the living room, kitchen, and bath. Her son had hired a colored woman to come in to take care of her twice weekly but she’d have none of it. Those people just wanted her money. Why, every month she was still being billed $29.95 for visiting Black Cocks for White Locks even though she hadn’t made a connection.

All of her possessions had been sold. The son saw to that. She was to enter his household and be a burden to all until her death. A death she knew they hoped would come soon.

The auctioneer and his partner had left. All of the items were gone save for hot dog wrappers and the occasional soda cup on the lawn. Her home, her residence, her castle… was as barren as Liz Patterson’s vagina.

The sun was descending like Lindsay Lohan’s career and her family wanted to leave. She begged them for just one more night. One night in the home she loved. Finally, they parted and she walked back inside.

There he stood. Ed Crankshaft leaned against the railing to the second floor. He was naked, save for a Saint Christopher medallion around his neck and his ubiquitous ballcap. The shaft of his penis stood erect like a British yeoman. She let her guard down.

“Take me. Take me, Ed. Give me a moment of passion to cure these ills I feel inside.”

He grabbed her and pulled her to him. “Woman, we can’t have ‘em knowin’ anything. If you move into that house, the jig is up. They’ll put us in a home.”

She knew he was right. Ed was always right. She slid her leathery hand down his chest. Taking his manroot, she squeezed as though it held the source of life itself.

“Fuck me, Ed. Fuck my brains out.”
———————-
The next morning, her son poured his coffee and headed to the Prius. He turned onto the street where he was reared and saw police cars and an ambulance. It was mother’s house! The tires screeched as he came to a sudden stop and jumped from the car. A neighbor shouted to the police that her son was there.

As he climbed the steps to the house, the officer held him back. He could see his mother’s feet and her bathrobe. And there, dripping down the wall?

Brains.
Howabominable (aka Lindsey ^_^)
July 17th, 2008 at 8:17 pm [Reply]

I personally loved “The Emperor’s New Groove”. Most disney movies aren’t laugh-out-loud funny for me, but that one is. However, I HATED Robin Hood, mostly because the villain was a lion. When I was a kid I had a very close attachment to felines – I hated any movie or show where one got beaten or defeat, which is a lot. So I wanted that lion to tear Robin Hood to shreds. A lot of Disney and kids movies tend to have this “cats are evil” thing, so I ended up hating a lot of them.
Mooncattie
July 17th, 2008 at 8:23 pm [Reply]

What worlds we live in! In reality, a sudden medical emergency is a cause for deep concern. In Crankshaft, it’s just the start of another day. In Funky Winkerbean, it’s business as usual. In For Better Or For Worse, a trauma such as, say, a sudden massive brain hemorrhage in the park, is actually a somewhat charming if not outright delightfully positive plot development.

Oh, why do I bother…Jamus, bats:[ and Dingo, you all own this evening! I’ll think of something funny…after I visit a local airfield…
AeroSquid
July 17th, 2008 at 8:33 pm [Reply]

C-Toe

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3105/2678752862_0ee10c30ec_o.jpg
Talking Squirrel
July 17th, 2008 at 8:42 pm [Reply]

#179 Dingo: Whatever you’re smokin’, dude, I want some.
AeroSquid
July 17th, 2008 at 8:47 pm [Reply]

The Jeffy

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3253/2677965755_5f14f60446_o.jpg
Jamus The Bartender
July 17th, 2008 at 8:55 pm [Reply]

Color me impressed, Dingo.
One-eyed Wolfdog
July 17th, 2008 at 9:09 pm [Reply]

#166 – Ah, puck, I’m hardly offended, dude. I just take any excuse to fire off a stream of completely disproportionately hyperbolic vitriol over matters completely trivial. It’s sort of why I’m here in the first place, you know? I’m pretty sure it’s in the mission statement.

Billingsley could still pull out a win by having Curtis come back the next day, only to find that Artisan Sandwichcraft McPonytail there has been replaced with a sleek, coin operated, lovingly polished metal and glass Automat, turn-of-the-century style. Our young protagonist seeks out the owner of the shop, who explains: “Yeah, I really love that old-fashioned stuff, man. They sure knew how to make ‘em, back in the day.”
commodorejohn
July 17th, 2008 at 9:24 pm [Reply]

#186 One-Eyed Wolfdog – Oh, that would kick so much ass.
One-eyed Wolfdog
July 17th, 2008 at 9:38 pm [Reply]

I was going for the sort of ironic twist there, with the old-fashioned angle, but now I think on it a bit it’d be just as funny if he got replaced by a modern touch-screen ordering system. With menus full of 3D, computer-rendered sandwich models. Curtis orders a stacked sub with four kinds of meats and five cheeses, and gets a free promotional Wall-E tie-in toy.

Or if the shoppy just had a random anvil dropped on him by the hand of a malicious & capricious god-like entity outside the frame, a la Duck Amok. That also works for me.

Possibilities, Billingsley! They are vast! Explore them! No need to thank me.
LTBF
July 17th, 2008 at 9:50 pm [Reply]

Les might have better luck getting published if he didn’t wander around in public talking out loud to himself. Publishers must think he is nuts.
Slylock Foxy
July 17th, 2008 at 9:58 pm [Reply]

As a general rule, I try not to judge by appearances, but I have to say TJ is at his gayest in today’s Luann. I think my middle-aged mother owns that shirt, and the narrow-legged trousers (crossed daintily) aren’t really doing the guy’s masculinity any favors, either.
anonymous
July 17th, 2008 at 10:02 pm [Reply]

#73 – yes! to all that.

(Personally, I laugh like hell when the brother runs blubbering into his mama’s comforting arms and says “Curtis hit me for no good reason”, and Curtis is put to work mopping the floor while poor widdle baby brudder is laughing and giving him the finger!)
survivor
July 17th, 2008 at 10:12 pm [Reply]

SPOILER ALERT!

Eric’s ‘purpose’ is that he must provide care for a monkey.

http://www.gpb.org/files/national/curiousGeorge_main_image.jpg
Chennuxfangrl
July 17th, 2008 at 10:15 pm [Reply]

#180 – Walt did not like cats.

Lynn Johnston, who was close personal friends with Walt Disney, said so.
Spotted HØrse, Jungle Steed
July 17th, 2008 at 10:19 pm [Reply]

Luann: My ex had a burnout social services job at a group home counseling juvenile sex offenders. I believe that what TJ is deploying here would be considered “grooming behavior,” in which the predator systematically tests and confuses the vic’s boundaries, escalating to more egregious trespasses. Geez, Evans, way to bring the squick.

Must soothe my offended sensibilities by revisiting AeroSquid’s filthy, filthy ad for TJ’s ACCESS: GRANTED personal lubricant, which squicks, but in a good way.
Hawkeye
July 17th, 2008 at 10:20 pm [Reply]

A3G: First Luann gets advice from a ghost, then a Tibetan holy man provides Eric with a destiny? When the #$%^% did “Apartment 3G” become a pulp novel?
Muffaroo of the Outdated Meme Patrol
July 17th, 2008 at 10:24 pm [Reply]

One-eyed Wolfdog @188 – Great minds, man.
Mary Kay Commando
July 17th, 2008 at 10:28 pm [Reply]

Humble request from a new kid:

Is there a one-stop-Internets-shop for my soap-viewing needs? My local paper hasn’t carried MW or A3G for mebbe 15 years (which made the haggard appearance of the latter girls all the more jarring. They used to be fairly hot, even in the 90s), and I’d never even heard of Rex Morgan. Now, however, I am sadly hooked. I know I could search on The Google my own damn self but y’all seem like a welcoming bunch.

Also, my mother was nostalgically pleased to learn that Mark Trail still does Sunday nature lessons, as those were always her favorite.
queek
July 17th, 2008 at 10:36 pm [Reply]

True Fable, I link you to lolgoats!

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/funny-pictures-goats-discuss-spider-size.jpg
FOOBed again
July 17th, 2008 at 10:37 pm [Reply]

#197 Mary Kay Commando: You can get them all here:
http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComics.mpl
They even have a cool feature where you can build your own comics page.

The old A3G artist died in the late ’90s (I think) and Frank Bolle took over. Another problem he has that we like to snark on is that so many of his characters look alike.
commodorejohn
July 17th, 2008 at 10:39 pm [Reply]

#197 Mary Kay Commando – Most of us do our comics viewing via The Houston Chronicle, which carries quite a few soap strips. There’s also goComics which has Brenda Starr, but the site is horribly bloated and slow, so I threw together a viewer script to fix that.
FOOBed again
July 17th, 2008 at 10:46 pm [Reply]

Also, Happy birthday, Josh!!!!!
commodorejohn
July 17th, 2008 at 10:46 pm [Reply]

Er, I got the link for my goComics viewer wrong. Correct URL is here.
Mary Kay Commando
July 17th, 2008 at 10:48 pm [Reply]

@ FOOBed again, commodorejohn:
Merci buckets.

Into the abyss!
Deena in OR
July 17th, 2008 at 11:09 pm [Reply]

Queek…Ya beat me to it!! :)
Deena in OR
July 17th, 2008 at 11:10 pm [Reply]

Anybody else watching Pete and Roger rock out on VH 1 tonight?
Vakar
July 17th, 2008 at 11:50 pm [Reply]

I have nothing funny to say right now, so I’ll leave it at, “Happy Birthday, Josh!”

…is that funny? Hmph.
mollificent
July 18th, 2008 at 12:18 am [Reply]

Better late than never…Happy Birthday, Josh! :D

*relurking*
True Fable
July 18th, 2008 at 12:22 am [Reply]

#198 queek – I…I think I’ve seen God!

GOATS!

GOATS IN UR TREEZ, FREEKIN AT UR SPYDUR!
True Fable
July 18th, 2008 at 12:22 am [Reply]

oh wait… Thank you, queek! :-)
True Fable
July 18th, 2008 at 12:38 am [Reply]

FBoFW Elizabeth thinks because a child nags her to buy sweets and toys, she has somehow achieved motherhood status. Liz does not care if Francois accepts her or not; she only uses this to point out to Anthony that since the child accepts her by nagging like a child does to a mother, Liz is therefore not contractually obligated to have any of that icky sex with him now. One pesky little curtain climber is enough!
True Fable
July 18th, 2008 at 12:49 am [Reply]

Cathy (Must Die!) Someone please tell me: just what the hell kind of pictures does Cathy have?
“This is a picture of me under a floppy hat wearing big sunglasses, a scarf and a muumuu at the beach. No, wait. That’s a display because the model has a nose.”
“This is a picture of my dogs. My dogs standing. My dogs sitting. My dogs peeing. My dogs scratching. My dogs sleeping. My dogs attempting to throw themselves in front of a bus.”
“This is a picture of…a big striped beach ball. No, that’s when I tried to take a picture of my toes and all I could get was my belly! My big, fat, lazy, never-say-diet gut! Ah ha ha ha! I’m overweight.”
“This is a picture of Ack. This is a picture of Irving on Ack. Any questions?”

I hate “Cathy”. There is no reason for her to have so many fucking pictures to frame when all she does is shop, eat, and flop sweat. Die, Cathy; Comic Strip Heaven is waiting for Thee.
bats :[
July 18th, 2008 at 12:51 am [Reply]

TGIFunnies!

FW: is Cindy an old character, or just some woman Les picked up at the book convention who went to lunch with him because he promised to pick up her tab?
Mind you, I don’t really care. It would be funnier if Chat Bleu was there.

JP: “And since you’re such a loser already, Sam, you’re halfway there!”

RMMD: and you know Rex is just wetting himself right about now…

FOOB: oh, that look on your face in Panel 4, Lizzie? Better get used to it for the next 15 years…
dyslexic dog
July 18th, 2008 at 12:52 am [Reply]

Hi Josh,
As the Central Time Zone runs out, I wanted to extend my belated wishes for your having had a great birthday a few minutes ago on the 17th.

For once I’m able to honestly quote The Beatles when I say,
“You say it’s your birthday. [although not overtly]
It’s my birthday too, yeah. [true]
They say it’s your birthday. [the 'mudges]
We’re gonna have a good time. [we always have a good time]
I’m glad it’s your birthday. [Hey, why not?]
Happy birthday to you. [yeh, yeh, yeh!]“
True Fable
July 18th, 2008 at 1:07 am [Reply]

Luann If TJ ever remembered you from your awkward years, I wonder how much he’d pucker now?
Poteet
July 18th, 2008 at 1:07 am [Reply]

# 193 fangrl — HA! I knew it. Thanks. My sibs and I (ChattyGenes included) used to watch Disney every Sunday night as wee ones, and we complained frequently about the anti-cat bias. There were a few exceptions, but most of the time Disney had wonderful dogs and obnoxious cats. But I’ll say this for Walt — he helped teach us how to snark. Some of his work BEGGED for snarking.
mumbles
July 18th, 2008 at 1:14 am [Reply]

FOOB: “Can I see my real mommy? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE? Can you stop sleeping with my daddy, whore? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE?”

FW: Lisa’s favorite place in New York was Ellen’s Stardust Diner? I find that very sad….like everything else that’s ever been in this strip.

MW: What the friggidy frig does Dr. Jeff mean? “Test” what out? The scampi at the Bum Boat? They’re going to eat again? “Make another go” at the date? Either Dr. Jeff is quoting some odd slogan from a Japanese t-shirt, or it’s been run through a translator program (e.g. Babelfish, but that reference dates me) a few times. Purple monkey dishwasher.
bats :[
July 18th, 2008 at 1:17 am [Reply]

215. Poteet: while there might’ve been an anti-cat bias, I think that was a reflection of the times, when dogs were the most popular pet. And although there were villainous cats (the Siamese in “Lady and the Tramp,” and Lucifer in “Cinerella”) there were also nice cats like Figaro in “Pinocchio.” “The Three Lives of Thomasina” was an absolutely great movie with a sweet, sweet cat.
True Fable
July 18th, 2008 at 1:20 am [Reply]

Curtis PLEASE. Most American animators can’t touch “Howl’s Moving Castle” and for sure, not the whiny why-me kind of dweeb like the one we’re seeing.
Deena in OR
July 18th, 2008 at 1:23 am [Reply]

bats:[ , Poteet-

And naturellement…don’t forget the Aristocats! (As opposed to the Aristocrats…a joke of an entirely different color :) )
FOOBed again
July 18th, 2008 at 1:32 am [Reply]

FW: Who is Cindy? Is she someone Les just met, or a recurring character? Anyway, Batiuk should never have moved this strip ahead 10 years. Today’s strip happening the year after Lisa dies would be sad of course, but would make perfect sense. 10 years later, and it’s just so obvious that Les never had a life or any girlfriends before Lisa, and never will again. I don’t know if that’s the impression Batiuk is trying to convey (I know Les was a nerd in high school, but he’s really not that bad now compared to Funky and some of the others his age–he even looks younger than them, and he’s not as much of an asshole either.)

But 10 years later and all he can do is go to Lisa’s favorite places, he’s not remarried and doesn’t even have a girlfriend, and he basically lives through his daughter. Hell, even Crankshaft has girlfriends off and on, and he’s a widower and a cranky old asshole. Crankshaft’s mopey son-in-law got married (granted, to another mope) and they even have sex sometimes or at least imply that they might. Why does Batiuk have to make Les such a… I don’t even know what you’d call him, but he’s just pitiful and it’s painful even to read about him.
True Fable
July 18th, 2008 at 1:34 am [Reply]

FW While I appreciate Les’s fond memories of Lisa, I wish he would decide ten years is long enough. Obsessing over your teenage daughter instead of moving on with your own life is just squicky.
JP SCRATCH GOLFER. That’s the only book you need to read, Sam.
Phantom Excuse me, sir, but your bullshit meter is going off.
RMMD Okay, I’m done with this storyline. If not for the occasional exciting fits throw by Dr. Andy, I’d wish for it to be over.
S4th Sally, do this: Step One: Tell Mom to Butt Out. Step Two: Hang up.
S-M Question: Just what exactly is the Vulture using to sky-write?
Zits Shoulda done that Tuesday.
Niall
July 18th, 2008 at 1:46 am [Reply]

TRUE FABLE:

If you look a little down this post pf photos, you will find two wonderful goats. Just thought I’d point them out to you. The rest of the photos are pretty snazzy too. :)
Rian
July 18th, 2008 at 1:49 am [Reply]

The Gordon’s Fisherman readies his harpoon as he prepares to hunt the one who stole his hat. Will he ever know peace?
Frank Parsnip
July 18th, 2008 at 2:04 am [Reply]

A3G: A Zapruderesque analysis of today’s panels:

Panel 1: The old man “melts” into the crowd wearing a bright yellow robe evidently made from Tenzin’s blond hair, evidently by going two steps away. Eric: “This must be a note from Tenzin!! I was lost in my thoughts about Margo and let down my guard!”

You think? No shit, slylock. I mean, you just blurted out something on the phone about taking Margo on a frickin’ honeymoon. Don’t you realize that she’s going to [choose one: sting/tear-your-head-off] upon mating for the first and only time?!?

Panel 2: Eric must never, for a moment, forget why he’s there. To buy some silk that he’s got to cart around for the rest of his trip to locate the mouldering, organ-depleted corpse of his executed brother?

Panel 3: Yep, he’s got to lug that package of silk around. Smooth move, ex-lax.

Sex Organ, M.D.: At which point, the police officer shrugged his shoulders, looked plaintively at Max Mallory, and responded: “Sir, you’re right… she doesn’t have anything to say. I’ll let you go with just a warning.”

Mark Trail: I am now convinced that Mark Trail is now written by random children who log onto an interactive site called “www.tell me what to draw.com”. Ideas like “make Kelly Welly poke the mountain lion with a stick” and “I want to see a moose chase someone” are then immediately incorporated into Mark Trail strips.
Mibbitmaker
July 18th, 2008 at 2:12 am [Reply]

7/18:

GT: And so, a young Ruben Kincaid starts off on his pro baseball career at last. (Really? Must be an alternate universe)

A3G: …And he’s the one who’s NOT on drugs???

S-M: Vulture never cared for the “spelling doesn’t count” rule on “MatchGame” — but he clearly does personal message skywriting as a sideline to the idiotic villian career.

FOOB: Nagging = acceptance. Gosh, what a lovely, lovely family. (NOTE: This comment just won the New Yorker magazine “Irony of the Week Award”! Congratulations, Mibbit!)

FW: If I close my eyes, it’s almost like this strip is as good as in the ’70s and ’80s. (opens eyes) ….Damn!

FC: This has been another episode of “The Childhood of Ed Crankshaft”.

Cranky: Cop out! …So, we’re still stuck with the old lady stripped of her history and humanity and her son and his family stuck with the miserable old bat. Lovely.

Curtis: I dunno… maybe it has something to do with the fact that they ARE JAPANESE? And that ANIME IS PRIMARILY MADE IN JAPAN???

FB: He means Roger Kettle, one of the guys that took over “Andy Capp”.
Trekkie
July 18th, 2008 at 2:25 am [Reply]

GT: Okay, so I said Pittsburgh and he ended up with Detroit. He’ll spend the next 3 years riding in buses from jerkwater town to jerkwater town, get a “cup of coffee” with the big club, get traded for a couple younger players, get sent back down, and end up the 40-year-old drunk at some Milford bar lamenting that he coulda been somebody.
Dr. Weird
July 18th, 2008 at 2:43 am [Reply]

168 Das – How long before the AJGLU3000 becomes disgruntled and decides to add a phallus to an otherwise “innocent” Archie comic?

I must be going to 4chan’s /d/ too much, as my first thought was “To Betty or to Veronica?” Who else?

Jughead prefers food to women… has Archie ever kissed either of them? He’s too much of a ’50s good boy to ever go park at the makeout point with either one…
Mibbitmaker
July 18th, 2008 at 2:50 am [Reply]

More 7/18:

MT: Ahh… setting camp, toasting Jack Elrod marshmallows on an open fireOH, CA-MON!! He has to know what he’s doing here! That cannot be a coincidence!

MW:
Mary: “Yeah! Just like the date I almost got to have with Ron just before we…… Uh, did I just say that out loud?”
Dr. Jeff: “WHAAAT??!”
Mibbit: “Well… here we go again…!”

MC: No…. but I hear it does involve pointy hair framing a bald head… Can you make your tie levitate…?

OBH: Uh, Ruthie’s mom? You left out “batshit insane”.

9CL: Brooke’s been tampering with the dialogue again! Stay in character, characters!

6C: Better go with the handshake, a bunch of right-wing blowhards have ruined the other thing with their Obama smears.
Stroker Ace
July 18th, 2008 at 2:56 am [Reply]

Gil Throb ~ “Dad…I got outed”.
Frank Parsnip
July 18th, 2008 at 4:18 am [Reply]

Luann: These past few days have been like watching Michael Jackson fake interest in Lisa-Marie.

Krankschaft: The EMTs will find clear evidence of hot-spatula spankings all over the body of the deceased caregiver.

Funky Pantysniffer: “If I close my eyes and get my left arm good and numb, it’s almost like she’s here.”

My Cage: Ah, yes, the classic days of bosses who could drink vast numbers of Manhattans during a lunch.

Jugs Parker: The funny thing is that the Chinese characters for Mao Zedong actually do translate to “Harvey Penick” in both meaning and approximate pronunciation.

Spider-Man: Personally, I’m not impressed by the Vulture using two hyphens to take the place of an em-dash.

Slylock Fox: I don’t know what Count Weirdly is doing, but I like it!

FC: Little Billy is thinking much the way that Japanese do when they visit aquariums — cries of “oishiiiiiiiii!” come from squealing children as they check out sea urchins, tuna, sharks, puffer fish, etc. behind glass. “Do they have a peanutbutterfish because this gelatinous thing with stinging tentacles looks tasty!”
Mr. O'Malley
July 18th, 2008 at 4:33 am [Reply]

Belated for Josh’s birthday:
World’s oldest blogger makes final post

A3-G’s research for this trip to Tibet seems to have consisted of renting a copy of Lost Horizon. Look for Sam Jaffe to make an appearance soon.

But actually I’m not that surprised that street vendors there speak English and understand quaint American measurement units. My father bought a Rolex watch at an amazingly low price from a persuasive street vendor in Hong Kong. Unfortunately the minute hand fell off, but as long as he only wants to know the approximate time it works great.

FC: What kind of a place is this with the tiny tanks? Do pet stores sell jellyfish? Wouldn’t it have been just as easy to draw something that looks like an aquarium?

Phantom: I think people are underestimating Andre. Maybe he is relaying his signal to that other platform by laser beam or hacking into a satellite signal. I’m hoping this strip will do a Barney Google and turn into The Phantom—featuring his friend Andre Dupierre, Technical Genius!. With the Jungle Patrol lady as his romantic interest, perhaps.

SlyFo: Forget the six differences, I like the artwork today.

Re 218 True Fable. While I am not a huge Disney fan, except for maybe the old B&W stuff, it was Disney that brought Studio Ghibli films to American audiences, and that was a great thing for animation fans.

GT: “Elmer” as a Hispanic name. There is a fellow who does an astrology show on Spanish language TV who is named “Walter“, even though there is an equivalent Spanish name “Gualtero”. (The article says he is “flamboyant”—he makes Liberace look like Don Knotts.) I wondered if there might be an “Elmero”. Apparently so, and even in Norway.

Well, OK, it turns out “Elmero” is not a very common name in Spanish after all. But perhaps he’ll create his own identity like Walter did.
Mr. O'Malley
July 18th, 2008 at 5:06 am [Reply]

Pluggers: I have a fairly modern VCR. It doesn’t have a way to set the time manually. It’s supposed to set itself from the time sent on the TV signal, but it doesn’t really work all that well. I wish I had one of those ones that you could set manually.

Not that I use it to tape anything from TV. We have a flat panel display but it doesn’t have a tuner so we use the VCR for a tuner. So it’s not that I really need the VCR to read the correct time, it’s just an annoyance.

Maybe someone is selling one of those old Plugger VCRs on Craigslist. I bought an analog FM tuner there recently—because I wanted to run a tuner on a timer so I could wake up to music. Anything built after about 1980 won’t turn on from a timer because it doesn’t have a hardware on/off switch, plus it won’t retain tuning if the power is off. Too many zombie appliances (mentioned in a recent Doonesbury, but it didn’t really follow up on the power wastage issue).

Strangely enough, the 30 year old Marantz tuner pulls in stations I can’t get on any other radio in the house.

But somehow I can’t really imagine: “Pluggers get much better defined bass response with their old vacuum tube amplifiers”.
One-eyed Wolfdog
July 18th, 2008 at 5:55 am [Reply]

I notice in Foob today that Anthony doesn’t have a sack.
John C Fremont
July 18th, 2008 at 7:11 am [Reply]

MT – Moss just asked for trouble. Details next Tuesday.

MW – Mmm. Squash scampi.

Phantom – Tense triangulating action!

RMMD – Officer Timmy seems concerned.

(Just kidding. That’s clearly “Risky Business” star Tom Cruise.)
gleeb
July 18th, 2008 at 7:47 am [Reply]

’shaft: Ah. To assure it is a good day to move to her new digs, she has pulled out the caregiver’s entrails and examined them.
Vince M
July 18th, 2008 at 8:02 am [Reply]

217: bats:[ – It’s true the cats in Lady and the Tramp and Cinderella are villainous, but they’re the highlights of the movies for me! That goes for Peg-Leg Pete too.
Shoshi
July 18th, 2008 at 8:04 am [Reply]

136 Cranky — HA, you called it for Gil Thorp!
Gary
July 18th, 2008 at 8:12 am [Reply]

I’ll say one thing for this week’s excreable Curtis — it’s got me “reading” that strip “first” to see how much stupider the “Pixar is evil” storyline can get.

I guess neither weepy sub guy (or angry soda guy) are the anonymous Disney animator quoted in Cartoon Brew when the Pixar merger was announced:

I LOVE the idea of Lasseter taking over Disney Feature! The only thing that would be better is if David Stainton [formerly president of Disney feature animation and the guy who fired Andreas Deja] is tazered, maced, and peppersprayed, and then frogmarched out of the building, stuffed into a burlap bag and thrown into the LA river. Oh, and a video of the above in an easily downloadable format for my iPod.
Treadwell
July 18th, 2008 at 9:48 am [Reply]

JP: Going to so much trouble to double the judge’s advance is pointless. Advances to authors are against their participation in future sales. So the judge wouldn’t be getting any more money than he would anyway, and if the book didn’t sell, he’d have to give the balance BACK.
Smash
July 18th, 2008 at 10:07 am [Reply]

For the last two days Arlo and Janis have been talking about Janis’s new blonde hair. My paper is coloring it brown! Arlo clearly has blonde hair so I know they have a yellow crayon – why is her hair still brown? Don’t the colorists read the words?
Poteet
July 18th, 2008 at 11:55 am [Reply]

# 217 bats — You are right, THOMASINA was one of the sweet exceptions. And I bet it’s also true that the anti-cat bias faded as cats became more popular as pets. My sibs and I were complaining in the early to mid-Sixties, when the weekly Disney program featured dogs much more than cats. Of course now I fully realize that the trainability of dogs probably contributed to that:-).

# 219 Deena — Is THE ARISTOCATS good? I don’t think I ever saw it – it came out in the early 70s, right? I was a post-Disney sophisticated high schooler by then (snork). Maybe I should rent it.
Emily
July 18th, 2008 at 3:44 pm [Reply]

If Eric Mills’ “purpose” involves not marrying Margo, as it is almost sure to, then I will be forced to write an angry letter to the writer of A3G.

WHOEVER THAT MAY BE.
TruthfulJerk
July 21st, 2008 at 10:05 pm [Reply]

Can you wear this bald? Damn thats harsh. Why not just put her to sleep, like the dog she is….WOOF!
TruthfulJerk
July 21st, 2008 at 10:05 pm [Reply]

Can you wear this bald wig? Damn thats harsh. Why not just put her to sleep, like the dog she is….WOOF!
Galatasaray
July 26th, 2008 at 3:44 pm [Reply]

I think wonderful.

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