The Comics Curmudgeon

687 responses to “The pieces are coming together”

1. CHA5NCE
   May 4th, 2005 at 10:31 pm [Reply]

   If Buck/Chuck dies, there will be much joyous head bobbing in Margo-land.

2. Tim Begley
   May 4th, 2005 at 10:32 pm [Reply]

   My guess is that Mabel Hendershot (the senile old lady that was abusing her grandson) is the one. She has been lying in wait, to take her revenge out on the Morgans. Buck, innocently enough, comes upon her one day, and attempts to foil her plan. Crippled by the bad hand, Mabel makes quick work of Buck and is back stalking June and Rex.
   Tim

3. Luban
   May 4th, 2005 at 10:35 pm [Reply]

   Hmmmm, interesting theory. Besides the Apt 3G tie-in, this could also be a subtle reference to the 2000 indie film Chuck&Buck, which can only mean one thing: more homoerotic subtext, mule!

4. Incident
   May 4th, 2005 at 10:35 pm [Reply]

   What did Abbey find in the cupboards, then? His sperm sample?

5. daChipster
   May 4th, 2005 at 10:56 pm [Reply]

   Hmmm, I sense a shotgun wedding coming up.

   More Buck-shot, Mule!

6. PizzaBagel
   May 5th, 2005 at 1:28 am [Reply]

   Rita’s up for lunch with Mary, but only at a little quiet, out-of-the-way place. Chez Meddler it is! You know where it is, Mama B.: In the Charterstone Cemetery, second mausoleum on the right, right across from the columbarium. “Shall I bring anything?” “How about some of your world renowned Alpo casserole? Yum!”

7. T Campbell
   May 5th, 2005 at 5:59 am [Reply]

   Have you considered adding a link to the strip in question so we can check out the archives around it? Makes it easier to keep up with the fast-paced world of Rex Morgan…

8. Pookie
   May 5th, 2005 at 6:42 am [Reply]

   Oh, no! St. Elly is about to give her house to Michael and Deanna so she can move herself, John and April into the apartment at Lovey’s!
   Talk about your dueling dowagers of death!

9. Kip W
   May 5th, 2005 at 6:47 am [Reply]

   She’s been itching to get out of that place for a while. The ghost of Farley rings the doorbell at night.

10. Kip W
    May 5th, 2005 at 6:48 am [Reply]

    ps: If the guy in Rex Morgan snuffs it, I get dibs on being the first to say “The Buck stops here.”

11. J.Po
    May 5th, 2005 at 7:50 am [Reply]

    Has anyone else noticed the striking resemblance between “Dr. Hamilton” and Buck, down to the little flippy hair thing over the forehead? Why does Dr. Hamilton flippantly joke about the phone call being from a bill collector, then briefly show concern when he finds that Buck has been “SEVERELY BEATEN,” then quickly catch himself and say that Buck has no family? What’s going on? Is Sara at home alone, climbing up onto the counter to retrieve and open Buck’s package? How slowly is the AIR-EVAC HELICOPTER flying, so as to take nearly two weeks to arrive at the hospital? Has anyone yet checked into Buck’s HEALTH INSURANCE? And where is Bronko Nagurski??

    There is only one, all-knowing, who can tie all this together.

    
    BARK BARK BARK
    WOOF WOOF
    GRRRRR
    
    Good girl, Abbey!

    Man, I think I need to switch to decaf.

12. Monkeys Uncle
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:02 am [Reply]

    I guess I’m the first to ask..

    Who is that wierd looking troll staring back at me from panel one? Did the hospital find a way to remove that suit from The Rhino.

    J.Po I think you are right. Mr Hamilton is probably Buck’s father. Does Buck know it though? This could be a Star Wars type plot twist. “Buck I am your father” “Come to the dark side of archeology”

    Bark!, Bark!, Bark!

13. O'Really
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:37 am [Reply]

    There once was a student named Chuck
    Who went by the moniker Buck
    In the light of the moon
    he got hit by June
    who found out that Rex he did ?

    I am having trouble with the last line, any suggestions?

14. Jes Wondering
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:39 am [Reply]

    So just was the letter for that “Buck” was mailing???? It seems that he has no family.

    Maybe it was just a letter to his congressman asking for legislation to get National Health Insurance

    I can hardly wait until September when we start to get some resolution to this storyline.

15. luluchappel
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:44 am [Reply]

    Monkeys Uncle–I think the weird troll in panel 1 is androgynous Pat, from the mid-90s Saturday Night Live.

16. Big Bully
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:47 am [Reply]

    Of the topic of RMMD for a minute, did anyone catch the Family Circus today?

    Jeffy likes to bring PJ along, so he is not the smallest guy in the group. (paraphrasing of course, I try not to memorize FC)

    What’s up with that? Is Jeffy saying he gets the snot beat out of him by his “friends” and so he takes innocent little PJ along so he can avoid the beatings? That, and he gets to join in on the punch fest.

    I see Billy, Jeffy, Dolly, PJ(y), Barfy, Mommy, Daddy all winding up on Dr. Phil explaining their disfunction.

17. TJ
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:51 am [Reply]

    T. Campbell: You don’t need a link to the strip to catch up. I’ll help ya out…

    12/31: New storyline in Rex Morgan M.D. Sarah gets a new dog, names it Ginger.
    1/1: We find out “Ginger” is a “rescue dog”.
    1/9: “Ginger” chases a skunk in the backyard of Chez Morgan.
    1/10: Doggie finds a bone.
    1/21: Still at the house…talking about bones in the backyard for nearly two weeks. Rex remembers the dog’s name is “Abbey”. THAT’S why she won’t come when called. This is explained to Sarah who couldn’t really give a big ol’ crap.
    1/22: The Morgans decide they need a fence to keep Abbey from running around the woods. (Isn’t that the point of living near the woods and having a dog?)
    1/24: DAY 2 in this crazy fast storyline begins.
    1/25: Sarah gets her “Flakey Wheats” for breakfast. June lets Abbey outside again.
    1/29: Four days later, Sarah still eating breakfast. We see the BONE in the house.
    2/3: June’s gone to work, took bone.
    2/10: After a week of talking about bones, looking at the bone, bones bones bones, June goes home to meet the fencing contractor.
    2/11: Sarah gets her lunch which she’ll be eating for a while.
    2/13: Abbey runs away AGAIN.
    2/16: Abbey finds a grave.
    2/17: We meet shadowy figure in the woods…..PUS BOY!
    2/20: Green eyes flashing, June starts making moves on “Mr. Foxworth” (Abbey growls, natch.)
    2/24: June goes back home to get bandages for Mr. Foxworth’s pus-encrusted hand. Sarah says “You were gone a long time Mommy.” (Only two weeks honey, finish your lunch.)
    2/26: Scariest day for a little kid EVER. Sarah, in bed getting ready for a nap says “What’s a hungry man doing in our backyard Mommy?” June: “He’s not in our backyard honey…He’s in the WOODS! Now you go to sleep.” Yeah, that’ll put her right to sleep mom! Geez.
    3/2: Back in the woods, we find out Mr Foxworth is an archeology student.
    3/5: June invites Foxy back to the house – his would is infected. Abbey looks on in disgust.
    3/9: Back at the house. Fence Post Frank shows up!
    3/10 – 3/19: Still at house, talking burial ground and making goo-goo eyes at each other.
    3/20 – 3/26: Dickering with Fence Post Frank. (Hee Hee…I said “dicker”.)
    3/27: Sarah wakes up after a month. We find out Mr. Foxworth’s name is “Buck”.
    3/28: Rex finally shows up at home. This is his first appearance in “Rex Morgan M.D.” in 1.5 months.
    3/29 – 4/5: Rex/June in the kitchen recapping the last 1.5 months.
    4/6: Buck’s back at the door.
    4/9: Ever watchful, Abbey sniffs at Buck’s bag. (Rescue dog, y’know.)
    4/13: Alone in the kitchen (with Abbey), Buck hides mystery package in the cabinet.
    4/17: Off to bed for the Morgans. Abbey stays in the kitchen pointing at the cabinet. (Is she a hunting dog or a rescue dog? I’m confused.)
    4/18: DAY 3 IN THE STORYLINE BEGINS!!! REJOICING ACROSS THE LAND!!! It’s been 52 days since day 2 started.
    4/19 – 4/24. Rex takes Abbey to the campground to see Buck’s dig.
    4/25 – 5/1: Rex can’t find Buck. Abbey does (Bark Bark!). Buck’s hurt. Rex calls in Medevac helicopter.
    5/2: New characters: “Dr. Hamilton” in the archeology department at the university is called.
    5/4: Dr. H says Buck’s name is “Charles”. Buck’s in critical condition.

    So, to recap the recap:
    Sarah got a rescue dog named Abbey. It runs a lot and finds bones. Bones are being dug by Charles “Buck” Foxworth, archeology student at the university. June fixes Buck’s hand. Buck helps get fencing discount. Rex likes saving money. Rex/Abbey go to see Buck who is now beaten up. Now Buck is at the hospital with NO HEALTH INSURANCE. And day 3 of the saga continues.

18. Mike Donovan
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:52 am [Reply]

    T Campbell – “Have you considered adding a link to the strip in question so we can check out the archives around it?”

    I know this is the “Comics Curmudgeon” but that’s a front for what it *really* is. “Josh Reads the Comics So You Don’t Have To”. Linking to the comics would make me read it, but since Josh is doing it anyway…

19. Battlefield Streaker
    May 5th, 2005 at 9:05 am [Reply]

    O’Really, the limerick’s last line is obvious:

    who found out that Rex he did blubb!

20. Tracibub
    May 5th, 2005 at 9:36 am [Reply]

    There once was a student named Chuck
    Who went by the moniker Buck
    In the light of the moon
    he got hit by June
    who found out that Rex he did ?

    Obviously, the last line should read: “Who found out that Rex was a schmuck.”

    I don’t know what the REST you were thinking… Dirty!

21. O'Really
    May 5th, 2005 at 9:37 am [Reply]

    When grad student Buck wanted a rub
    he would go with Rex to the tub.
    June they would ditch
    and a tent they would pitch
    and together they would go Blubb.

    A tip of the Hatlo Hat to Battlefield Streaker

22. Sassy_Rocks
    May 5th, 2005 at 10:02 am [Reply]

    That butt-ugly androgenous troll in panel one is none other than Berna, Rex’s erstwhile medical assistant and friend of Chef Tito. Someone beat her within an inch of her life with the ugly stick.

23. evilwaldo
    May 5th, 2005 at 10:03 am [Reply]

    Monkeys Uncle,

    I first thought the troll was going to eat Dr. Hamilton but now that is a look of fear. Fear because Dr. Hamilton might steal her snacks from the break room.

    Either that or she noticed Dr. Hamilton has a matching butch haircut.

24. Parasol Wench
    May 5th, 2005 at 10:11 am [Reply]

    No, no, no, you have it all wrong. Chuck’s real identity was right there all along! There’s even a link to talk to him.

    http://www.ugcs.caltech.edu/~weathers/chuck.gif

25. Sturgeon General
    May 5th, 2005 at 10:18 am [Reply]

    They got the last panel wrong.

    It should read “He’s been admitted to the hospital. . . in CRITICAL CONDITION and he has no HEALTH INSURANCE!!!

26. lynette
    May 5th, 2005 at 10:23 am [Reply]

    terrific synopsis, tj. You are the Cliffs Notes of the curmudgeon.

27. daChipster
    May 5th, 2005 at 10:31 am [Reply]

    “E Pluribus Unum” means “Out of many, one” – it’s written on the banner clenched in the beak of the eagle on the Great Seal of the United States as shown on the back of a one dollar bill.

    Now go back and re-read Foxtrot.

    You’re welcome.

28. Brucker
    May 5th, 2005 at 10:46 am [Reply]

    TJ forgot to mention that “Buck” asked the Morgans to mail a letter to his mother around 4/7, and today we learn that he supposedly has no family. Oh, the intrigue!

    With that “package” buck left hidden in the Morgans’ home, I keep thinking of the freaky ending scene in the movie “Se7en” with Brad Pitt going “What’s in the box? What’s in the box?!?!”

29. katya
    May 5th, 2005 at 11:16 am [Reply]

    Please, please, please talk about Wednesday’s For Better or for Worse. There’s Jewish and then there’s Jewish caricature. The only thing that would make their landlady more Jewish is if she was eating a bagel topped with a matzoh ball topped with a rugelach. Oy vey!

30. Luban
    May 5th, 2005 at 11:56 am [Reply]

    I think Berna the medical assistant is standing in stunned silence because she can’t believe how bad Nurse Becka’s dye job is. So is Becka a natural blonde who tried out a raven-haired Goth look for a while, and now her roots are growing back in? Or are we to believe that her head casts a ridiculously funky shadow?

31. Worry Wart
    May 5th, 2005 at 12:36 pm [Reply]

    You know that Ellie in today’s FBOFW has much to much time on her hands when she is worried that Mike and family have too much room in their new apartment. What? They are only alloted so much square footage per person? The kids might get up a head of steam and crash into the wall?

    I think she better be more concerned with April. The girl is going to go totally roadside one of these days because she doesn’t have the proper square footage at home.

32. Christina
    May 5th, 2005 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

    Worry Wart, I think Elly was thinking of her own house with the “too many rooms” – i.e. enough rooms that Mike and Deanna are able to drop off their kids whenever they please for Grandma to babysit…

33. O'Really
    May 5th, 2005 at 12:46 pm [Reply]

    Chuck was a grad student from Fargo
    who “met” young Mim in Key Largo.
    He was not really a gent
    when he pitched her his tent.
    and his comeupance he got from ol Margo.

34. Longfeller
    May 5th, 2005 at 12:51 pm [Reply]

    How many fences would a Buck/Chuck build
    if a Buck/Chuck could chuck wood?

35. Monkeys Uncle
    May 5th, 2005 at 12:58 pm [Reply]

    Next on Rex Morgan MD

    Dr Hamilton: “He has no family, none”

    Buck: “Father why have you forsaken me? I can save you a bundle on fences!”

    Abbey: “GRRRR!”

36. Jeff R.
    May 5th, 2005 at 1:00 pm [Reply]

    So, what exactly does the children’s entertainer doing a few rounds of “The Name Game” do when the kid tells him that his name is Buck or Chuck?

37. Darth Sillyus
    May 5th, 2005 at 1:22 pm [Reply]

    Buck/Chuck/Pus Boy, “I think you are overcharging on your fencing quote. I have built many fences, as a matter of fact my father was an honest railer out in Montana before he died.”

    Fence Post Frank, “No, BCPB. Your father didn’t die in Montana. I am your father!”

    BCPB, “NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

38. Other_Sally
    May 5th, 2005 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

    No! Buck can’t die! He’s the only comics-page character I ever found remotely attractive!!

39. Father Time
    May 5th, 2005 at 1:42 pm [Reply]

    Don’t worry Other_Sally, at the rate of action in RMMD, YOU will be long dead and forgotten before Buck makes it to surgery.

40. TJ
    May 5th, 2005 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

    Other_Sally,

    Great topic for discussion…funny page characters that turn you on. As for me, now that she’s legal, Edda from 9 Chickweed Lane is the bun AND the whole pan, if you know what I mean: http://www.chron.com/content/chronicle/comics/archive/showComic.mpl?date=2005/5/5&name=9_Chickweed_Lane

41. Dennis Jimenez
    May 5th, 2005 at 2:32 pm [Reply]

    Chuck Chuck bo buck banna fanna for…., well anyway – Chuck.

42. Hmmmm
    May 5th, 2005 at 2:37 pm [Reply]

    I think that Helga from Hagar the Horrible is totaly roadside. She is one horny babe.

43. JohnnyC
    May 5th, 2005 at 2:44 pm [Reply]

    I think Becka is hot…and her hotness is emphasized by being placed alongside the realistically troll-shaped medical waste receptical.

44. Islamorada Girl
    May 5th, 2005 at 2:56 pm [Reply]

    Does anyone else notice “Dr.Hamilton” in RMMD bears a suspicious resemblence to Orville Redenbacher? Is the popcorn business so bad that he has to moonlight as a department head at Wassmatta U?
    And what is FPF’s last name? Could it be…
    FOXWORTH?

    Daddy!

    Oh, the suspense is just killing me.

45. Moesy
    May 5th, 2005 at 3:11 pm [Reply]

    Serial killers don’t have families, i’m tellin’ ya, it was anthrax in the letter to his “mom.” He got beat up and left to die by his latest victim, who was able to overpower him due to Buck’s pus encrusted hand.

46. RememberByronFrost
    May 5th, 2005 at 3:22 pm [Reply]

    Hutch Renfro gets my vote for comics hottie … with all those quarters and dimes he wins he’s da bomb!

47. daChipster
    May 5th, 2005 at 3:23 pm [Reply]

    God will probably strike me down dead for this, but the mom in Family Circle is a complete hottie married to a total foob.

    And you KNOW what they say about the quiet ones!

    But what really does it for me is brains and a sense of humor – thus, to return to yesterday’s format: “I was looking forward to a quiet, uneventful vacation of sport fishing. But I never dreamed that when I got to Islamorada…”

48. Islamorada Girl
    May 5th, 2005 at 3:27 pm [Reply]

    Chipster—Meet me at Ernest Hemingway’s boat.
    You bring the beer, I’ll get the pizza.

    Mmmmwha!

49. fluffytufts
    May 5th, 2005 at 3:42 pm [Reply]

    Oh, the obvious hot funny pages character – Dagwood’s wife Blondie! In the real world, the weight of her enormous rack would snap that cinched waist like a twig! Yow!

50. Tracibub
    May 5th, 2005 at 3:46 pm [Reply]

    A young anthro student named Buck
    Spoke about diging in muck,
    June cut him some slack,
    In a cupboard he hid is crack,
    And now he’s admitted into the ER with really bad head truama and no freakin’ family left to foot the damn bill cause he’s got no HEALTH INSURANCE!!

    Okay, so my skillz need a little work in the poetry side, but come ON!

    In other news, the gay/notgay guy that Edda tango’s with is hot, too. Well, at least in MY imagination. ;)

51. Other_Sally
    May 5th, 2005 at 3:51 pm [Reply]

    “A quiet place would be best,” Rita Begler says, her hair two shades lighter due to grief and nefarious planning, “so no-one will interfere with your abduction.” But Mary still thinks she’s calling the shots.

    Meanwhile, the Spiderman-Rhino battle is getting interesting. Spiderman says that fighting with Rhino is weakening him–which to my recollection has never happened in any other fight he’s had. Plus he hasn’t even really been fighting him yet–he just caught a punch and picked up a wooden beam. He exclaims torturously, “I can’t hold it much longer,” and lets the beam drop–but why the agony in his voice? There’s no reason to be holding up the beam now that he stopped it from crushing that woman, anyway. No, it’s not the wooden plank Spidey’s talking about, but Rhino’s REAL superpower — instant weakening of a foe’s bladder on contact. Rhino wins by making you pee!

52. Peaches
    May 5th, 2005 at 4:05 pm [Reply]

    Actually, Rhino’s kinda hot in that melancholy,
    vodka- driven Russian mobster way. I bet he cleans up real good, but it would take hours to get the suit off with acetone and a rag and by then, you’d be out of the mood.

    Michael Patterson gets hotter as he gets older.
    If you could put a paper bag over his personality, he’d be a total hottie.

53. Joe D.
    May 5th, 2005 at 4:14 pm [Reply]

    Everyone in Gil Thorp is hot, especially when they are drawn inconsistently and not quite like mutants. For example, the food bank girl (who is currently turning down molester/broadcaster Marty Moon) looks like a different person in every panel in which she’s appeared. That’s sexy. And everyone’s hair. Sigh.

    On Gil’s plot, I can’t wait for tomorrow when they’ll just use the panel from the day he was hauled off by police yelling “YOU CAN’T DO THIS! I’M…I’M LEGENDARY!”

    I wish I lived in Milford.

54. Incident
    May 5th, 2005 at 4:21 pm [Reply]

    Peter Parker is the hottest comic character of all time, no question.

    Although I have to admit Skunk Girl intrigues me more and more…

55. Incident
    May 5th, 2005 at 4:36 pm [Reply]

    Oh crap, I forgot, Luann is the hottest comic strip character, because she doesn’t have sex.

    http://joshreads.com/index.php?p=189

    Hell, she doesn’t even put up with mild hugs.

56. Peaches
    May 5th, 2005 at 4:44 pm [Reply]

    Luann would go totally roadside with Aaron Hill in a New York minute, pamphlet or no pamphlet.

57. Flasshe
    May 5th, 2005 at 5:08 pm [Reply]

    Maybe it’s Spidey’s stunt double picking up the wooden beam and getting easily tuckered out? Doesn’t everyone in that movie have a stunt double? Mary Jane’s going to be all like “Peter! Why do you have blond hair? Whoops.”

58. J.Po
    May 5th, 2005 at 5:20 pm [Reply]

    All I can say is, while Rex is still up there in the AIR-EVAC HELICOPTER, probably for another 2-3 weeks, I’d like to pitch a tent with June Morgan. Imagine the pent-up passion (following aborted tryst with Buck and discovery of Rex’s other side) there…

    With Nurse Becka along to watch, and maybe jump in as needed, of course. Thank goodness I have HEALTH INSURANCE just in case!

59. Incident
    May 5th, 2005 at 7:37 pm [Reply]

    I’m not an expert on family law, but by this point, I’m pretty sure Abbey is Sarah’s legal guardian.

60. johnwhorfin
    May 5th, 2005 at 7:48 pm [Reply]

    Hey, Josh got a mention in my local rag today:
    http://www.freep.com/money/tech/wguide5e_20050505.htm
    I must say that I disagree with the snide comment about the “commenters” tho’-(Warning: Many of the commenters think they are funnier than they are.)-reading the comments quite often makes me laugh out loud, so much so that I can’t peruse the site at work anymore.

61. Monkeys Uncle
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:09 pm [Reply]

    Happy Cinco de Mayo!

    After some deliberation and beers I must vote a strict Brandy/Blondie ticket for hottest comic strip charecters.

    I girl,
    Yeah, he does look like a plump Orville Redenbacher. I’m still looking for the corn connection. Maize, ancient Native American bones, tameles….

    “What is it Abbey, do you smell a clue?”

    “Bark!, Bark!, Bark!”

62. Sourbelly
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:19 pm [Reply]

    Miss Buxley gets my vote. Then again, Marty Moon’s food pantry gal is pretty hot, in an I-have-a-third-ear-growing-out-of-the-back-of-my-head sort of way.

63. Charles
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:24 pm [Reply]

    I must say that I disagree with the snide comment about the “commenters” tho’-(Warning: Many of the commenters think they are funnier than they are.)

    Less pretension, mules!

    I’d love to know who the writer was talking about. I shall hide my head in socially anxious shame until I discover that he never noticed my comments in the first place.

64. Buck the Wonder Student
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:28 pm [Reply]

    When is Josh going to syndicate the comments from this forum into a newspaper comic for all to read? Get a halfway decent cartoonist, and this is an instant hit. I get the most laughs each day right here. Ok. Maybe I don’t get out enough, but there are enough of us shut in grad student types out there that would read the strip.

65. Smokey Stover
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:36 pm [Reply]

    Aleta, Blondie, and (for old times sake) Daisy Mae and the Dragon Lady.

66. Abbey
    May 5th, 2005 at 8:38 pm [Reply]

    My comments are always biting.

    Bark! Bark! Bark!

67. Islamorada Girl
    May 5th, 2005 at 9:10 pm [Reply]

    Dying, Sheridan said, is easy. Comedy’s hard. So hard in fact, that it ought to be left in the hands of people with an actual sense of humor, rather than some quasi-literate techno nerd from the Freep. He or she probably hasn’t unlearned every idiot thing fed in j-school yet. Come work on my copy desk, kid! You’ll learn AP Style through the seat of your Dockers! Nobody downs my peeps!

68. Incident
    May 5th, 2005 at 9:30 pm [Reply]

    Well, since I find everyone else’s post to be absolutely hilarious, he must be talking about me. Fair enough. Of course, I’d rather be not funny than be a writer for a local newspaper. Pretty much my definition of a circle of hell, right there. So, it’s a fair trade-off.

69. daChipster
    May 5th, 2005 at 10:05 pm [Reply]

    Well, after cinco (de Mayo) shots of Patron Anejo, I can truly aver that some of you are twice as funny as you ought to be, but I think half of you are only half as funny as you deserve to be and probably are without my knowing it, and all of you are getting funnier by the shot.

    And that reporter should know that I KNOW for a moral certainty that I am MUCH more funny than I think he thinks I think I am.

    I think?

    VIVA JUAREZ!

70. daChipster
    May 5th, 2005 at 10:07 pm [Reply]

    New tagline for the group:

    (SEPULCHRAL VOICE-OVER)

    At Josh Reads Dot Com, we grok funny.

71. jamison
    May 5th, 2005 at 11:15 pm [Reply]

    ok, women’s side. ladies, what male comic strip character makes you wish you could jump in the comics for a day?

    i’ve always liked the phantom, even with his asides. arlo’s cool, especially when he’s hormonal. i must say, i have a soft spot for amos of 9cwl, especially the last time we saw him. poor guy. just recently, i’ve cast an eye at the professor from apartment 3-g (or where ever he lives). that hemingway honey’s all that, and a can of ham!

72. Luban
    May 5th, 2005 at 11:44 pm [Reply]

    Whoa nelly, the creepiness level of MW just got ratcheted up big-time…

    http://www.chron.com/content/chronicle/comics/archive/showComick.mpl?date=20050506&name=Mary_Worth

    Panel 1 is weird enough with Mary savoring her “fresh grief” flashback of widowhood. Then comes Panel 2, with Rita confiding to her dead daughter over a glass of Scotch? The hell? This is getting about as macabre as a Robyn Hitchcock song.

73. Lor
    May 5th, 2005 at 11:59 pm [Reply]

    My vote goes to Asok the intern from Dilbert. Ah, that wide-eyed naivete … that eagerness to please … those mad engineer skillz … mmmmm….

74. PizzaBagel
    May 6th, 2005 at 12:27 am [Reply]

    “My darling daughter…I have a new friend! [hic!] In addition to Mr. Demon Rum, that is! [blerp!]” (Or Mr. Satan Scotch, as the case may be.) I can’t believe that Mary Worthless hasn’t taken on the evils of alcoholism in her long, illustrious career of meddling. Oh, well. Strap yourselves in for another bumpy ride, folks.

75. meagan
    May 6th, 2005 at 12:41 am [Reply]

    gahh! gil thorp today (friday) is horrible. why does he keep doing this? why??!
    “for the best beats, i’ll take kanye west.”
    “but no rapper tells a story like nas!”

76. Charles
    May 6th, 2005 at 2:32 am [Reply]

    Michael Patterson gets hotter as he gets older.
    If you could put a paper bag over his personality, he’d be a total hottie.

    Michael Patterson is also more womanly than his sister. You’ve obviously been hiding something from yourself.

77. Valiant
    May 6th, 2005 at 6:53 am [Reply]

    In RMMD today, that ominous shadow in panel two clearly indicates that the old geezer is being threatened by Mickey Mouse.

78. Zanzibar
    May 6th, 2005 at 7:12 am [Reply]

    The last line of today’s Luann is a bit racy, don’t you think?

    http://images.chron.com/content/chronicle/comics/images/2005/5/6/Luann.987.g.gif

79. yellojkt
    May 6th, 2005 at 7:18 am [Reply]

    Hottest comic strip character past or present is Daisy Mae from L’il Abner. She was smmmmmokin’.

80. spiderbaby
    May 6th, 2005 at 7:25 am [Reply]

    I have a bit of a crush on John, the comic book store owner from Funky Winkerbean. He always shows up in a plot line soon after I’ve decided to stop reading that strip, which sucks me back in for another couple of monthes of bland restaurant jokes and Afghanistan flashbacks. Are they ever going to get back to his court case? Ever?

81. yellojkt
    May 6th, 2005 at 7:28 am [Reply]

    Back in the day when CityPaperOnline ran a comic commentary, Tom Scocca had a running gag that Greg Evan really wanted to do Luann. As she has “matured”, it makes for some pretty creepy subtext if you read it right. No one is good enough for Luann, especially pretty boy Aaron. Only middle-aged comic writers are worthy of her. Why do you think Aaron got sent to “Hawaii”?

    Aaron is actually sharing a room with Dean from the movie “Saved”. See link: http://www.av1611.org/othpubls/savedmov.html

82. Islamorada Girl
    May 6th, 2005 at 7:51 am [Reply]

    Oh, wow! There Momzilla is, slugging’ down the cheap scotch and talking to a picture of Dead Fay.
    Look out, Mary! She and Jeff are gonna be drinkin’ buddies and there’s NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT! Bwa-ha-ha!

    On the bright side, at least Momzilla got out of the house, even if it was just to go down to
    Booze’n'Brew.

83. daChipster
    May 6th, 2005 at 8:25 am [Reply]

    comiX X-overs for a Friday:

    In Beetle Bailey, apparently Otto’s been reading Mark Trail, as he laments not having a Tiffany Collar.

    And Get Fuzzy and Non Sequitur BOTH have jokes today about Noxious Rectal Emissions.

    And, yes, that WOULD be a good name for a band.

84. Abbey
    May 6th, 2005 at 8:56 am [Reply]

    On the topic of hot comic characters, Otto has always gotten under my collar.

    Bark! Bark! Bark!

85. Abbey'sSister
    May 6th, 2005 at 9:03 am [Reply]

    I’ll take Andy……monolithic heads make me crunkin’ blubb!

    WOOF! WOOF!

86. Tracibub
    May 6th, 2005 at 9:07 am [Reply]

    I couldn’t decide if Mary was the new friend, or if the plastic fifth of Scotch was the new friend… Creepy mourning drunk old women make for catchy comic subjects anytime! ;)

87. Dub Not Dubya
    May 6th, 2005 at 9:25 am [Reply]

    Okay, some celebrities have been spotted in today’s Gil Thorp: http://www.chron.com/content/chronicle/comics/archive/showComic.mpl?date=2005/5/6&name=Gil_Thorp

    In the foreground of the first panel is Frankenstein, or Herman Munster. In the right lower corner is Bobby Hill from King of the Hill, in drag. In the last panel, Mandy Graham is actually Nancy from the comic strip of the same name, aged into a teenager. (BTW, does that strip still exist? If not, now we know what happened to her.)

88. Other_Sally
    May 6th, 2005 at 9:42 am [Reply]

    >>>This is getting about as macabre as a Robyn Hitchcock song.

    Ha! My prediction of Mary in the basement with a ball gag is totally coming true.

    Seriously, any of you seen “Apartment Zero”?

89. Flasshe
    May 6th, 2005 at 9:43 am [Reply]

    I didn’t know we were supposed to be funny!

    Since I’m fairly new to Mary Wirth (as of the middle of the Brain/Anna stoooooryline), can someone give me some background? Is Mary a serial killer or something? When Momzilla comes over for dinner and Mary gets her all liquored up, is she going to find Anna’s head in the fridge right before the axe comes a-swingin’? Otherwise, I don’t know how this story can become interesting.

90. Flasshe
    May 6th, 2005 at 9:44 am [Reply]

    Sorry, I meant lunch, not dinner. Although I bet lunch at Mary’s is just like dinner at Denny’s!

91. Fay'sRestlessSpirit
    May 6th, 2005 at 9:56 am [Reply]

    Dub I love the celeb’s rundown in todays GT.

    In Panel 1 the guys states “slow Sat. if we’re watching a Track Meet” and in Panel 2 the other guy seems to smugly think “NOT a slow day for ME! My voyeuristic side is having a Way Kewl Time! (I’m hep, a real swinger, NOT a loser like the rest of you cats.)”

92. RememberByronFrost
    May 6th, 2005 at 10:04 am [Reply]

    In today’s MW Rita is so tanked on cheap scotch, she’s talking to a pic. of HERSELF,,, not her dearly departed daughter.

    She and studly Jeff are a match made in Heaven! Pity Meddlin’ Mary, who’s about to experience MORE “fresh grief” (as opposed to what,, like, “stale” grief?)

93. yellojkt
    May 6th, 2005 at 10:19 am [Reply]

    Glad someone picked up on the two fart jokes today. We need to keep a watch and see if that record can be broken.

    Is miscegenation allowed in Milford or is Mandy’s hair just unusually kinky? She doesn’t have the Peanuts ## crosshatching to indicate any non-European heritage.

94. Sassy_Rocks
    May 6th, 2005 at 10:33 am [Reply]

    That picture is of her Ivory Girl pee-pod daugther. That apple didn’t fall too far from the tree. I get the impression that pumpkin was the favorite gourd of that inbred family.

    Mary is too consumed with grief for her saintly ex husband to deal with Dr. Jeff’s wants ‘n needs. Momzilla, on the other hand, is a burning caldroun of love when she gets a couple scotches in her.

95. cleanbot
    May 6th, 2005 at 10:33 am [Reply]

    Tommie gets her catty moment of vindication in the spotlight today! You’ll see that Margo takes a second in panel two to plan her revenge, but simply reverts to the ol’ crowd-Tommie-out-of-the-frame maneuver.

96. PizzaBagel
    May 6th, 2005 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

    Hey, Dub Not Dubya, ask and ye shall receive. I can’t believe it, but Nancy is still around. Look what I found:
    
    http://www.unitedmedia.com/comics/nancy/archive/nancy-20050506.html

    And who’s the buxom babe nursing the cup o’ tea? Not her Aunt Fritzi, that’s for damn sure! Looks eerily like a recent incarnation of the aforementioned Daisy Mae.

97. Heathcliff
    May 6th, 2005 at 1:04 pm [Reply]

    Garfield is the cat’s meow. Espcially when Bill comes on over. Man does the fur fly.

98. yellojkt
    May 6th, 2005 at 1:13 pm [Reply]

    I stand by my statement that 9 Chickweed Lane is the horniest strip in print. Who didn’t see Edda and Amos hooking up at the tango bar? But just how much was set up by Light Loafers roommate?

    Since I am new to the strip, is Edda “roadside” yet, or is she saving herself for Amos? Catholic girls start much too late, but she’s a big girl now.

99. gershwin
    May 6th, 2005 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

    PizzaBagel wrote: “And who’s the buxom babe nursing the cup o’ tea? Not her Aunt Fritzi, that’s for damn sure! Looks eerily like a recent incarnation of the aforementioned Daisy Mae.”

    I think that IS supposed to be Fritzi, PB. Interesting that the newer artists re-introduced her, as I think the original strip by Bushmiller was all about her, with only occasional appearances by the niece who didn’t inherit her looks.

100. yellojkt
     May 6th, 2005 at 1:40 pm [Reply]

     The newer incarnation of Aunt Fritzi owns a lot fewer bras. But does she still have punction marks leap out of her forehead at random?

101. J.Po
     May 6th, 2005 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

     Good one, RBF…I caught the “fresh grief” line (”hey, get your fresh grief here!”) and figured that, like fish, you want it good and fresh if you’re the Queen of Heavy Meddle. So will Rita show up at MW’s tanked, or raid the liquor cabinet once she’s there? By October, we should know!

     Nice to see Aunt Fritzi again…certainly looks like she’s let her hair, among other things, down since we saw her last!

102. Luban
     May 6th, 2005 at 2:28 pm [Reply]

     Is miscegenation allowed in Milford or is Mandy’s hair just unusually kinky? She doesn’t have the Peanuts ## crosshatching to indicate any non-European heritage.

     Perhaps Mandy is Milford’s biracial hottie. This might also explain why the onlookers are taking such pleasure in Brent Rap-Dog’s doomed efforts to traverse the racial barrier. (I mean, Kanye West? C’mon Brent, so mainstream! Mandy knows Nas never crossed over.)

103. jamison
     May 6th, 2005 at 2:31 pm [Reply]

     yellojkt, since you are new, you ought to google “9cwl” and “rec.arts.comic.strips” because they talk a lot about 9cwl and pibgorn, a cool series by the same author.

     right before edda’s ballerina tryouts, and amos’s julliard audition, somthing happened between them that rocked their previously close-knit worlds. what, we don’t know, but it could have been anything from a first kiss gone wrong, or third base with a strikeout. the upshot is *something* happened, and now they aren’t as sure about their relationship now as when they were growing up.

     i can’t say enough good things about this subtle, yet powerful strip.

104. TJ
     May 6th, 2005 at 2:34 pm [Reply]

     Yellowjkt,

     On the subject of Edda’s um..er…”deflowering”, that’s unknown at this juncture. Right before she left for the big city, she and Amos had a big time makeout session, after which Edda returned home and said “Omigod, what did I do?” She wouldn’t tell anybody (including mom) what happened, she left for the city without telling Amos (causing the rift that’s been between them ever since), and that’s been pretty much it.

     Wow, I know way too much about this.

105. Incident
     May 6th, 2005 at 2:50 pm [Reply]

     I really can’t decide which of today’s strips offends me down to the very core of my being more, Mary Worth or Gil Thorp. Good job, everyone!

106. Wren Wah
     May 6th, 2005 at 2:55 pm [Reply]

     Wow, Haven’t seen Nancy or Aunt Fritz in years. I’m fascinated that Aunty is now drawn with a semi-realistic flair, while the title character is still only 2 steps above stick figure. I think there is something a Freudian going on with the brothers(?) Gilchrist. (But, I guess that is better than them being obsessed with drawing pre-teens).

     As for 9 Chickweed Lane, thanks for the heads up. I’ve never seen it before and it looks like it might be worth keeping an eye on. Although the pace may be only a little faster than RMMD, the writer seems to have something to say and at least the art is appealing.

107. Joe D.
     May 6th, 2005 at 2:58 pm [Reply]

     Today’s Gil Thorp:

     According to panel two, Brent and Mandy are sitting directly in front of the voyeurs. Shouldn’t they be somewhere in panel one? Or did they just arrive somewhere between panels one and two? Are they invisible?

     What’s the guy with the backwards hat looking at in panel one?

     Why is no one concerned with the fact that the athlete in panel two has a javelin stuck in his leg?

     And lastly, nice headband, Brent.

108. Joe D.
     May 6th, 2005 at 2:59 pm [Reply]

     I wish I lived in Milford.

109. Luban
     May 6th, 2005 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

     I think Brent must have gotten his stylin’ headband from his trainer, Ludacris.

110. Monkeys Uncle
     May 6th, 2005 at 3:37 pm [Reply]

     Kayne West? Nas?

     I admit I’m out of touch with this modern Hep-Hop sound but I have never heard of these people. Are they real? Is it possible that I am less hip then a charecter from Gil Thorpe?

     I think I should hang up my leg warmers, throw out my parachute pants, and hide under the covers with my Flock of Seagulls fan club hair care guide.

111. Bookworm
     May 6th, 2005 at 4:15 pm [Reply]

     In the spirit of hot comic characters AND reconnecting with Nancy, here is what the United Media website says about Aunt Fritzi –

     “Nancy’s ultra-glamorous aunt. She’s a fair and caring guardian to Nancy and inspires crushes from lots of men – two-dimensional and three-dimensional alike!”

     Exact quote, I promise.

112. Incident
     May 6th, 2005 at 4:20 pm [Reply]

     I may be wrong about this, but I thought Kayne West was one of those awful modern R&B singers, not a rapper. He doesn’t actually have beats, he just makes annoying atonal sliding sounds for an hour. “Ohhhhh laaaaaaaaadeeeeee, AAAAYYYYEEE waaaaaaaaaaaanaaaaa doooo yooooo alll uuuuuup,” and such.

113. Luban
     May 6th, 2005 at 4:39 pm [Reply]

     OK folks, some of you are proving yourself to be not nearly as “down” as that wigger Brent. It’s Kanye, not Kayne, and he’s got proven skills in both beatmaking and rapping. Even Grammy voters know that much. Read more here if you need the, uh, 411.

114. Islamorada Girl's Monkey
     May 6th, 2005 at 4:43 pm [Reply]

     Death to Gil Throp.
     Thank you.

115. Luban
     May 6th, 2005 at 4:49 pm [Reply]

     Yep, that Aunt Fritzi is one hot mama, no question. The Gilchrist brothers have said that the sexing-up of Fritzi is really a return to Ernie Bushmiller’s original vision of the gorgeous flapper Fritzi Ritz (back when Nancy was just a secondary character). More like a flapper with implants, I’d say.

116. J.Po
     May 6th, 2005 at 5:27 pm [Reply]

     Well, here’s a pretty dramatic indictment of my life: I just went back through Nancy strips looking for more of the totally hot Aunt Fritzi… regrettably, I had to wade through nearly a month of horribly lame strips to get to April 11, where Fritzi appears to be sporting a leather skirt and the aforementioned implants. Is it just me, or does she have a kind of Rita Moreno/Marisa Tomei thing goin’ on?

117. Islamorada Girl
     May 6th, 2005 at 6:23 pm [Reply]

     By the middle of July, Momzilla and Meddle Queen should be drinking a medium dry sherry lunch while listening to Mary’s old Mario Lanza and Lawrence Welk records and dishing the dirt on the other matrons in the local DAR chapter. The excitement is killing me.

118. Islamorada Girl
     May 6th, 2005 at 6:25 pm [Reply]

     Oh. Moe Czclack, the socially inept bartender in the Simpsons is my kinda man! Hubba hubba!

119. Incident
     May 6th, 2005 at 6:35 pm [Reply]

     “Well, here’s a pretty dramatic indictment of my life: I just went back through Nancy strips looking for more of the totally hot Aunt Fritzi…”

     Thank god there’s somebody else as pathetic as me.

     Anyway, Islamadora Girl, if you want to bring animated characters into it, that’s just opening up a whole can o’ worms. I don’t think you want to know what was going on in most male minds during Thundercats.

120. TwoClubs
     May 6th, 2005 at 6:36 pm [Reply]

     QUICK!!!

     If you are logged in right now, tune your TV to Wheel of Fortune! It’s Mother/Child night, and I SWEAR Momzilla and Nurse Fay are playing. That would be the team on the far left.

     Because of the well-known circumstances, it must be a previously-recorded program.

121. Incident
     May 6th, 2005 at 6:57 pm [Reply]

     Buckles’ owner Jill is pretty hot, in a good girl sort of way.

     http://www.kingfeatures.com/features/comics/buckles/about.htm

122. Islamorada Girl
     May 6th, 2005 at 7:03 pm [Reply]

     Sorry, Incident. There just aren’t all that many really hot guys in the two dimensional comics.

123. Incident
     May 6th, 2005 at 7:08 pm [Reply]

     No wrapper tells a story like Bazooka Joe.

124. GilmoreGuy
     May 6th, 2005 at 7:08 pm [Reply]

     More like a flapper with implants, I’d say.

     We call that a Flopper.

125. Jowdygirl
     May 6th, 2005 at 7:20 pm [Reply]

     Once again you people have me spitting scotch on my monitor….. how dare the columnist say the commenters here are not funny? Love Islamorada Girl’s take on MM and Momzilla, was thinking along those lines but never clever enough to think of of MM dusting off her old albums and old phonograph! (dammm, where’s that needle?)

     But it will be worth it Mary! You’ve lived a meddling (but sheltered) life ’til you’ve been with a scotch-soaked mooching hot mama (closet Lez) who hasn’t had any in about 20 years!

     More casseroles Hot Mama! (whichever one)

126. Jowdygirl
     May 6th, 2005 at 7:36 pm [Reply]

     To keep a G rating here, I’m saying Mary’s in for a great foot rub. I have it on good authority that’s about all scotch-soaked hot mama’s are capable of…. better than nothing.
     Especially when you have prepared them a friggin’ lobster casserole with a very nice vinagrette-dressed escargole (sp?) salad, and an exquisite dry sherry/champagne cocktail, for LUNCH.

     (Thought balloon for MM: why do I even try? and even dusted off my old record albums from the storage room in the basement?)

127. Islamorada Girl
     May 6th, 2005 at 7:42 pm [Reply]

     Joe D—If I owned Hell and Milford, I’d rent out Milford and live in Hell.

128. Zanzibar
     May 6th, 2005 at 7:47 pm [Reply]

     I’d never really noticed it before, but after looking through the Buckles archives it seems really apparent that the cartoonist has borrowed a whole lot from Calvin and Hobbes. Is this an unconscious influence, or do you think that these artists actually go back to the Calvin and Hobbes strips and copy design elements out of them? In particular the way the bird gestures with its wings looks exactly the way that Calvin as the owl gestured in the transmogrifier gun story.

129. Anne Nonymous
     May 6th, 2005 at 10:17 pm [Reply]

     Incident- you think Buckles’ owner Jill is hot???? What the **** is that on her head, a haystack? Is she an escapee from a barnyard? Here’s hope for all women with REALLY bad hair days- just introduce yourself to Incident.

130. Incident
     May 6th, 2005 at 10:41 pm [Reply]

     Well, um, bad hair can be fixed. She has a pretty face and what looks to be a nice rack underneath those sweaters. And, yes, by all means, hot ladies with bad haircuts come to my place.

131. Luban
     May 6th, 2005 at 10:43 pm [Reply]

     Regarding those buxom Depression-era relics Blondie and Fritzi… I’d just like to point out that we get to see both of them in slinky nightgowns, the kind with straps that just happen to casually fall off their shoulders every now and then…

     http://blondie.com/dailies/blondie.20050424.gif
     http://www.gilchriststudios.com/nancy/fritzi/20.asp

132. Luban
     May 6th, 2005 at 10:49 pm [Reply]

     One more off-the-shoulder shot of bedtime Blondie:

     http://blondie.com/dailies/blondie.20050423.gif

     Just don’t tell the FCC about these wardrobe malfunctions…

133. Lor
     May 6th, 2005 at 11:16 pm [Reply]

     More like a flapper with implants, I’d say.
     - – -
     We call that a Flopper.
     
     Isn’t a Flopper what you end up with if you don’t get implants?
     Or even worse: the Flipper.

134. RememberByronFrost
     May 6th, 2005 at 11:43 pm [Reply]

     Until tonight had never had the pleasure of Buckles

     Just another affront on those of us employees who have too much time on their hands?

     could have come from my boss, like it’s my fault that I was under-utilized

     hmmmm????

135. RememberByronFrost
     May 6th, 2005 at 11:55 pm [Reply]

     BTW Death to Gil Thorp.

     Unless they at get some ‘updated’ hairstyles like this
     http://www.vincevance.com/

136. Incident
     May 6th, 2005 at 11:58 pm [Reply]

     Speaking of too much time on my hands, why have I been posting here all day? I hate sick days.

     Anyway, Falling Nightie Syndrome is an epidemic among large-breasted females in newspaper comics. Possible causes include having a loser nerd for a husband and/or being drawn by a loser nerd. If you or someone you know is suffering from FNS, contact your doctor. And, um, use spirit gum, or something. Or just buy clothes that fit.

137. PizzaBagel
     May 7th, 2005 at 1:05 am [Reply]

     Methinks that after the funeral, Mama Begler had her daughter/peapodmate Fay cremated and had her urn made into a stylish lamp. Check out panel one
     here.

138. Islamorada Girl
     May 7th, 2005 at 6:08 am [Reply]

     Is Brent Rap Dog wearing a dew rag in GT? The man needs white dreads for that full Jamal effect.

     My dream is to see everyone in Gil Thorp in these hairstyles!
     http://www.mulletjunky.com/

     Oh, and death to Gil Thorp. Thank you!

139. Islamorada Girl
     May 7th, 2005 at 6:11 am [Reply]

     Meanwhile, over in MW, Momzilla’s inhaling more cheap scotch and mulling coming out of the cocoon!
     I knew the Beglers were Pod People.

140. krispy kreme
     May 7th, 2005 at 9:25 am [Reply]

     the hottest comic character is the giant foreground moose in Mark Trail. The way he gazes thoughtfully into the distance, often with leafage hanging from his lips…sigh.

141. J.Po
     May 7th, 2005 at 11:05 am [Reply]

     Party at Incident’s place! Who’s in with me? I’ll bring the styling mousse for the hot comic ladies having bad hair days.

142. Adouble
     May 7th, 2005 at 11:40 am [Reply]

     Incident got served by Luban!

143. Anne Nonymous
     May 7th, 2005 at 12:09 pm [Reply]

     Has anyone else noticed that it used to be rather rare to have 100 or more comments per posting, and now it’s pretty common? This seems to have changed right around the time of Josh’s trip to Bermuda, and really took off after his haiku contest. Either Josh needs to post more frequently, or we ALL need to get real lives.

144. Luban
     May 7th, 2005 at 2:30 pm [Reply]

     Ahhhh… As I suspected, it’s Brizzent who’s polluting Milford’s airwaves with his Fauxbonics. Mandy looks rightfully perturbed in Panel 3. In tomorrow’s strip, I expect Brent will explain how he rocks a mic like a vandal, at which time Mandy will be compelled to stuff that lame do-rag down his throat.

145. Incident
     May 7th, 2005 at 7:01 pm [Reply]

     “Incident got served by Luban!”

     Served by him, like, if he was my butler, maybe.

     BURN!

146. susie
     May 7th, 2005 at 8:00 pm [Reply]

     Hottest guy on the comics page–no competition–is the grandfather in One Big Happy. He is one smokin’ babe.

147. J. Po
     May 7th, 2005 at 8:07 pm [Reply]

     Incident – speaking of bad hair guests, let’s invite Helen, Sweetheart of the Internet to your party – she is sporting a prodigious rack in Sunday’s strip. (I think she minimizes it most days.)

148. The Disembodied Voice
     May 8th, 2005 at 3:38 am [Reply]

     I’d just like to point out Brad’s brilliant observation in Luann today:

     “I just realized something, Mom. I’m 19, so this is your 19th Mother’s Day.”

     Maybe Luann told him that Toni likes exciting men, so he’s trying to develop a stimulating intellect.

     Then again, Toni’s the one emotionally manipulating him by dropping her goon of an ex-boyfriend’s name (the one who almost beat him up?) whenever things get too “serious,” so I dunno what he’s so eager about…

149. Parasol Wench
     May 8th, 2005 at 10:38 am [Reply]

     Presumably there was a Mother’s Day during the year before he turned one, too, so it would be her 20th Mother’s Day. Nice try, though, Brad!

150. Incident
     May 8th, 2005 at 3:02 pm [Reply]

     Does Evans even realize that Toni is THE WORST SNOTTY B!7& who ever lived?

151. Islamorada Girl
     May 8th, 2005 at 3:42 pm [Reply]

     Toni Daytona is comic proof that men will go for looks every time, even there are seriously ugly issues lurking behind that fine face and bodacious bod. Of course, women do it, too.
     Otherwise, where would any of us get our daily drama queen/king fixes?

     Meanwhile, over in 3G (the G must stand for GAG!) Luanne’s about to lose another job! She must be the Worst Art Teacher in World Reknowned NYC, because I think this is about the third go-round on her standing in the unemployment line.

     And yes, I am deeply ashamed to admit I remember this.

152. Peaches
     May 8th, 2005 at 3:49 pm [Reply]

     In today’s MW, we get to see the Meddling One’s living space. It looks as if she ran through Decorating Den with a magnet. Who are those people in the photos, anyone know? Anyone care?
     I personally would love to see Meddling’ Mary and Momzilla find true love in a geriatric
     lesbian alliance, but you know it isn’t going to happen in King Features. Maybe an Oprah book club trade paperback, but never in the funnies.

153. zot
     May 8th, 2005 at 3:50 pm [Reply]

     Hey everybody! Mark Trail’s about to get eaten by a giant squirrel!

154. Incident
     May 8th, 2005 at 4:51 pm [Reply]

     “I feel drawn to her!” I feel drawn to my toilet after reading this pap.

     Who’s Mary quoting now? Some other 70’s self-help guru cult leader type?

155. Peaches
     May 8th, 2005 at 4:53 pm [Reply]

     Hot comic guy? Mandrake the Magician, because even Fence Post Frank would look handsome in white tie and tails.

156. Islamorada Girl
     May 8th, 2005 at 5:06 pm [Reply]

     Note also, that Mary has a large cross on her chest, which she covers up with a jacket. Is this because that icon is Mary’s secret Meddle Alert charm that warns her of fresh prey?

     What she needs is a big M sign projected in the sky like the Batman light. Then, when there’s meddling to be done, she can hop in the Marymobile (a white ‘03 Escalade) and get to the scene of the drama before the EMT’s!

157. Adouble
     May 8th, 2005 at 5:06 pm [Reply]

     Does anyone remember the excitement fest that was “Defenders of the Earth”? It was an 80s cartoon featuring Mandrake the Magician, the Phantom and Flash Gordon. I might have only been 5 at the time, but I could still tell that this was the most bootleg group of public-domain superheroes ever. Defending the Earth was what the Justice League and the Transformers did. These guys could probably handle defending a 7-11 in a middle-income neighborhood. Day-shift only.

158. Incident
     May 8th, 2005 at 5:21 pm [Reply]

     God I loved Defenders of the Earth, the show that proved all you need to join a super-hero team is a Blackstone magic kit and plenty of moxie.

     I’m relatively new to Mary Worth, but she seems to be a lot more invested in this meddle, putting herself in the thick of it. She wasn’t out there smoking a bowl with Tommy or committing adultery with Anna. Is she getting in over her head? Or is she the Kaiser Soze of meddling?

159. Firegoat
     May 8th, 2005 at 5:30 pm [Reply]

     speaking of people in photos… who was that in the photo over Opus’s bed this morning?

160. Adouble
     May 8th, 2005 at 5:34 pm [Reply]

     I was guessing Berke’s mom on some Happy-Mother’s-Day tip.

161. Suzii
     May 8th, 2005 at 5:56 pm [Reply]

     I’ve gotta recognize 3-G’s astonishing subtlety and human decency in wrapping the Mim line exactly in time to not force some nasty Mother’s Day smarminess down our throats.

     And as for the employment volatility of an art teacher, an insanely high proportion of the schools in this country are cutting their art instruction, and young teachers are the first to go. So a private school with no union representation has its pick of talent.

     Ok, that’s my quota of defending 3-G for the decade. I’m off to take some aspirin.

162. leathermessiah
     May 8th, 2005 at 6:01 pm [Reply]

     Josh! Crikey, man, what on earth has happened to you? Days pass between updates! Your entries are becoming stranger and increasingly cryptic! Each morning I head to TCC, my heart alive with hope that there will be a new gleam of hilarity in my otherwise bleak life, and my heart is crushed as I look once more upon the awkward art of the same Rex Morgan strip. I am lost without you! Please come back, for the love of God, Josh! My final exams begin tomorrow, and I can hardly summon the will to get out of bed in the mornings!

     … (I may be exaggerating slightly)

163. Islamorada Girl
     May 8th, 2005 at 6:39 pm [Reply]

     Leather–when you feel consciousness picking at you like an especially irksome toddler, remember there’s a full day’s comic page misery out there waiting for your snarky comments!

     And yes, more comics, Joshy-Mule!

164. susie
     May 8th, 2005 at 8:13 pm [Reply]

     It seems to me that Josh is actually the weak link in this operation. I’m not suggesting a coup or anything like that, I’m just saying.

165. Bookworm
     May 8th, 2005 at 9:41 pm [Reply]

     Okay, prediction time people! I say the good Dr. Hamilton’s secretary knows more about Buck/Chuck/Charles than her boss does. (Check out Saturday’s RMMD. http://www.chron.com/content/chronicle/comics/archive/showComick.mpl?date=20050507&name=Rex_Morgan) The question is what does she know? Is she Buck’s secret wife? Or his drug supplier?

166. Islamorada Girl
     May 8th, 2005 at 10:55 pm [Reply]

     Or is she going to rush out to Morgan Woods and loot Pus Boy’s dig and claim it all as her Ph.D. thesis? Or just sell it all on eBay? Without tenure, she’s probably pretty close to living in a tent in the woods herself.

     You can just tell by the craftily drawn expression she’s up to something. We’ll know what in about two years.

167. Incident
     May 8th, 2005 at 11:16 pm [Reply]

     “I say the good Dr. Hamilton’s secretary knows more about Buck/Chuck/Charles than her boss does.”

     I’ll bet Buck showed her his bone, and erected a tent.

168. Ummmmm
     May 9th, 2005 at 6:06 am [Reply]

     Please, this is a family blog.

     You PITCH a tent, not erect one.

     Thank you.

169. yellojkt
     May 9th, 2005 at 7:03 am [Reply]

     In MW, there is no way Kay got planted or burned, Momzilla stole her out of the coffin and is waiting for the Master Meddler to go snooping in the attic. Then the spooky music starts.

170. yellojkt
     May 9th, 2005 at 7:13 am [Reply]

     So why is Helen so buxom in a golf shirt but totally flat in a softball jersey? Something is screaming Wonderbra.

171. Monkeys Uncle
     May 9th, 2005 at 7:43 am [Reply]

     I hate Gil Thorpe!

     because now I read it every day.
     It looks like Brent Rap Dog is trying to put the moves on that little lady. Is that hair supposed to be an afro? Is Mandy a he/she? Where is the homoerotic subtext? Is that guy with them making fun of other peoples flattops?

     In other news: Todays Brevity show Marmaduke getting his first look at the TCC blog.
     http://www.comics.com/comics/brevity/index.html

172. J. Po
     May 9th, 2005 at 7:52 am [Reply]

     I suspect that Helen minimizes more often than not. We’ll find out when we gather all the Comics Hot Chicks at Incident’s place.

     Up to 172…come on, everyone, let’s shoot for 200!

173. Smitty Smedlap
     May 9th, 2005 at 7:57 am [Reply]

     Firegoat…

     I think the photo in Sunday’s Opus may have been Harper Lee, author of “To Kill a Mockingbird.” Don’t have the strip handy, and it’s not available online, but I think this may be the picture he used:

     http://www.lawner.gothere.uk.com/images/books/authors/hlee001.jpg

174. Picky, Picky, Picky
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:07 am [Reply]

     Smitty is probably right about Harper Lee, but wrong about Opus not being available online. Here’s just one source — http://www.uclick.com/client/wpc/wpopu/

175. TJ
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:48 am [Reply]

     Re: Today’s (5/9) Gil Thorp.

     Is Brent trying to say “G’s” as in “nothin’ but a G thang baby…” when he says “The Geez from WVOV thought Von was so kickin’…”
     http://www.chron.com/content/chronicle/comics/archive/showComic.mpl?date=2005/5/9&name=Gil_Thorp

     I still hope Ludacris shows up so Josh can crap his pants.

176. Amazed and Disillusioned
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:50 am [Reply]

     Buck/Charles/Chuck/Pus Boy

     LIED?!?!?!?

     Can we believe anything he said? About his fencing experience? About his relationship with FPF? About the bones he found? The unknown ancient Indian Tribe he discovered? His attraction to June?

     Say it ain’t so Pus boy. A nation turned its weary eyes to you as a beacon of truth, justice, and the American Way.

     Sigh.

177. RememberByronFrost
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:52 am [Reply]

     Meddlin’ Mary is talking “Dubya-speak” today: “….close enough so it’s not too remote….” hmmmm, okay, does that also mean it’s remote enough so it’s not too close?

178. RememberByronFrost
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:56 am [Reply]

     Speaking of lying Pus-boy, has June forgotten the letter he gave her to mail to his “mother?” Why doesn’t she check out the name and address to track a possible family member?

     And us Josh-heads should feel knowingly smug at the latest development re: Pus-boy NOT being enrolled.. hell, we figured that out 3 months ago!

179. Moesy
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:07 am [Reply]

     What did I do with all my free time before TCC? Do you have any idea how long it takes to read this many posts?!?

180. Flasshe
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:08 am [Reply]

     The Top Ten Reasons Josh Hasn’t Posted An Entry Lately:

     10. Off auditioning for new season of The Apprentice.
     9. Paralyzed by indecision – can’t choose just one Comment of the Week.
     8. Writing treatise on the use of made-up slang in American comic strips.
     7. Busy designing new line of Apartment 3G-inspired retro women’s wear. Zippers optional.
     6. Emotionally devastated after reading Detroit Free Press article saying Curmudgeonettes aren’t as funny as they think they are.
     5. In D.C. lobbying congress for Health Insurance reforms.
     4. Reading all the blog comments takes up time formerly allocated to coming up with new entries.
     3. Kidnapped by Ces, who is not letting him go until Josh takes back things he said about Sally Forth.
     2. Questioning the universe after realizing The Lockhorns is funny after all.

     And the number one reason Josh hasn’t posted an entry lately:
     Skipped to Bermuda with profits from sales of Fence Post Frank hats.

181. Anne Nonymous
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:11 am [Reply]

     Hey, susie, you’re right. Josh IS the weakest link. I say we stage a coup. Vive la révolution! To the barricades, mes amis! PS: Death to Gil Thorp.

182. Wren Wah
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:13 am [Reply]

     I’ll follow Islamorada Girls anywhere she goes.

183. Islamorada Girl
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:20 am [Reply]

     Suppose, just suppose, we are all just figment’s of Josh’s imagination, and we only exist inside his mind?

     Are there any birders in Joshland? Can anyone tell me what the bird is in the first panel of MT today? I can’t find it in my Peterson’s.

     All of which exposes my intrinsic nerdiness.
     Maybe I’m Josh’s nerd alternate personality?

184. Pookie
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:22 am [Reply]

     Why that pus encrusted LIAR! He led June and Rex on and then dashed their hopes! Bad grad student! Bad! Hit him with a rolled up master’s thesis!

185. Islamorada Girl
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:24 am [Reply]

     Oh, and death to Gil Thorp.

     Start the revolution! I want Gil’s flatop head on a pike!

186. Bookworm
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:24 am [Reply]

     Poor June. She chose to trust Buck, and she how she is repaid. Will this devastating blow send her spiraling into depression? Will she retaliate by unhooking Buck’s IV? Stay tuned. As Islamorada Girl says, we’ll know in a couple of years.

     And on the topic of hot comic strip guys, check out Monday’s Luann: http://www.comics.com/comics/luann/archive/luann-20050509.html

187. zot
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:29 am [Reply]

     Meanwhile over in MW, Momzilla’s so helpless she can’t drive! Meddlin’ Mary has to fire up the old lady Buick (we know she drives an old lady lead sled, we just know this) and go pick up the lovely Rita, who snarls how envious she is of Mary’s swingin’ single lifestyle.

     You shouldna told her about that second bedroom, Mary. She’ll be packing her stuff and moving in before you can quote another lifestyle guru!

188. Anne Nonymous
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:31 am [Reply]

     I say we vote Islamorada Girl as our Great Leader- bring it on, girl! We’ve got your back!

189. J.Po
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:40 am [Reply]

     Some brief and very random observations:

     “Modest two-bedroom apartment condo,” my ass. It’s The Meddlin’ Queen’s Fresh Grief Love Shack.

     June Morgan has been clueless all these years that Rex is bisexual, and can’t find a rectangular-solid package staring at her amid a collection of mixing bowls…should we be surprised that she’s just now realizing that Pus-Boy LIED to her?

     No luck on identifying the bird in MT, but I do know it’s clearly out of its normal habitat…since Jack Elrod usually puts wildlife in the SECOND panel. Wonder if that turtle from last week has made it away from the lawnmower yet?

190. J.Po
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:42 am [Reply]

     Have we registered the domain name http://www.islamoradareads.com?

191. Figured It Out
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:45 am [Reply]

     Josh is just off pitching his tent somewhere.

     SPLUTT! BLUBB!?

192. Smitty Smedlap
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:48 am [Reply]

     Ask and ye shall receive — Gil Thorp’s head on a pike. Ar ar ar.

     http://subdivided_we_stand.typepad.com/thorpe_pike.jpg

193. Adouble
     May 9th, 2005 at 10:13 am [Reply]

     Moesy and Flashee,
     Given the lull in TCC, I’ve been reading post backlogs and see that you both understood my shout-out to Smiley’s! Had I noticed at the time, I would have definetly turned to comments to talk of things like riding the 15 and the Lion’s Lair. Hold me down, Colfax, hold me down.

194. Flasshe
     May 9th, 2005 at 10:18 am [Reply]

     Colfax deserves its own A3G-type comic strip, Adouble. More Russian whores, mule!

195. NeglectedSarahMorgan
     May 9th, 2005 at 10:30 am [Reply]

     Oh Where, oh where can our Joshy-boy be?
     Oh Where, oh where can he be?
     With his proceeds from sales; also from ad’s,
     Oh Where, oh where can he be?

     sniff

196. O'Really
     May 9th, 2005 at 10:48 am [Reply]

     There once was a curmudgeon named Josh
     whose lifestyle became very posh.
     With money from stuff
     things were no longer tuff
     so he moved to the Bahamas, b’gosh.

197. RememberByronFrost
     May 9th, 2005 at 11:05 am [Reply]

     BTW, Excellent job on the top 10, Flasshe!!! You got my vote for “comment of the week” for sure

     and – c’mon Josh, you’ve blogged from Bermuda BEFORE (or maybe he’s on his honeymoon? guess that would be a fair excuse to neglect us poor souls for a few days)

     Counting down to 200 posts here guys!

198. Anne Nonymous
     May 9th, 2005 at 11:07 am [Reply]

     Okay, we need to start taking nominations for the new Comics Curmedgeon, to take over for Josh. I nominate Islamorada Girl, and, if she declines, either daChipster or Incident. Or maybe RememberByronFrost, J.Po, Other_Sally, or a host of others.

199. Adouble
     May 9th, 2005 at 11:16 am [Reply]

     Josh is gone for under a week and people are already trying to engineer a coup? For shame, comic readers, for shame.

200. fluffytufts
     May 9th, 2005 at 11:20 am [Reply]

     Well, Josh does have that vixen, the Future Mrs. Curmudgeon, to distract him, after all. Isn’t she a sex educator/facilitator or something like that?

201. fluffytufts
     May 9th, 2005 at 11:21 am [Reply]

     Hey! I was entry 200! Whoo-hoo!

202. Flasshe
     May 9th, 2005 at 11:27 am [Reply]

     For shame – Josh and his insights are irreplaceable! Although maybe Islamorada Girl could ghost-write while he is on vacation, kind of like a temporary version of a Jim Davis Garfield “assistant”.

203. RememberByronFrost
     May 9th, 2005 at 11:32 am [Reply]

     Whoo Hoo way to go Fluffy! Thanks for the nod Anne – you belong in the illustrious group of possible successors as well, along with a host of others as you said. But Josh will be back soon – you know he’s dying to hear the latest dirt on MW/RB upcoming love affair in the mausoleum apartment of fresh grief!

204. Coup! Coup! Coup!
     May 9th, 2005 at 11:41 am [Reply]

     Yes, we all love Josh, but you know what they say about snoozing and losing. Islamorada Girl — take it away!

205. J.Po
     May 9th, 2005 at 11:41 am [Reply]

     Thanks also, Anne, for the New Curmudgeon nod…I might add Moesy or SassyRocks to the esteemed Comics Curmudgeon Cabinet…but I fear that perhaps such a coup might be perceived in the same vein as “Bil Keane is celebrating Father’s Day, so Jeffy is drawing Family Circus.” Always a laugh riot, that tired old gag.

     Does the Curmudgeon get HEALTH INSURANCE ?!?!?!

206. Hmmmm
     May 9th, 2005 at 11:50 am [Reply]

     You people are sick. A guy goes to pitch his tent behind your woods and go look at some funny papers, and you go and whump him upside his head.

     For shame. Kicking a guy when he is down so you can take over.

207. Anne Nonymous
     May 9th, 2005 at 11:54 am [Reply]

     Or perhaps Peaches or Jowdygirl. Flasshe, despite your loyalty to Josh, you, too, could take over.

208. Irina
     May 9th, 2005 at 12:00 pm [Reply]

     Anyone wanna throw me a bone about today’s Get Fuzzy?

     It kinda looks like it’s a strip that picked up in mid-plot. What show is Satchel watching?

209. Incident
     May 9th, 2005 at 12:07 pm [Reply]

     Brent Rap-Dog is currently neck-and-neck with Remora Rita for Kookiest Comic Strip Dialogue of the Year award.

     Seriously, if the person sitting on my passenger side unironically said the words “How enviable!”, I’d be jumping out the window without bothering to roll it down first. “How enviable! I’d certainly like to live in an apartment like that! If only somebody would hack you to pieces with a knife, then I could have it all to myself! Oops, did I say that out loud?”

     Wait… Mary Worth has a two-bedroom?! What the Centrum Silver does she need two bedrooms for?!?!?! Dagnabit, an old lady on the dole with a two bedroom is not “modest” by any culture’s definition.

     Getting back to Gil Thorp, I love the defeated look on Brent’s face when Gil finally calls him on his BS.

     I’m flattered by my nomination for Comics Generalissimo-For-Life, but I’m already busy with all these hot comic strip babes.

210. J.Po
     May 9th, 2005 at 12:17 pm [Reply]

     I nominate O’Really for Poet Laureate in the Islamorada adminstration.

     P.S. Death to Gil Thorp.

211. Anne Nonymous
     May 9th, 2005 at 12:34 pm [Reply]

     Sorry, Irina, I have no idea what program Satchel is watching- does anyone else? And Death to Gil Thorp- it has never made any sense to me, ever. Mary Worth obviously needs the second bedroom for when the good doctor “stays over”- remember, they have a strictly chaste relationship. He’s obviously ripe for Rita’s plucking. Or maybe not; maybe he just needs Cialis to make Mary completely happy. If she wasn’t so sexually frustrated, perhaps she would stop her meddling ways.

212. fluffytufts
     May 9th, 2005 at 12:39 pm [Reply]

     Apropos of nothing, I just “discovered” 9 Chickweed Lane, and now I’m hooked. Went back and read the last month of strips, too. Curse this blog. I’ll never actually get work done again.

213. Flasshe
     May 9th, 2005 at 12:55 pm [Reply]

     Speaking of Cialis, I almost laughed at today’s Prickly City:
     http://www.ucomics.com/pricklycity/2005/05/09/

     I must now commit Noogie Sepukku.

214. Moesy
     May 9th, 2005 at 1:09 pm [Reply]

     Wow, I’m an Unofficial-Official-Coup-Cabinet-Member-Nominee! My vote totally goes to IGirl. But maybe just as a temp for our MIA Josh.

     ADouble – Glad you commented on Smiley’s. I thought maybe I was the one Josh-head that wasn’t as funny as I thought. I’ll ride the 15 with you any day. (that wasn’t meant to be sexual…)

     PS. Death to Gil Thorpe.

215. Hmmmm
     May 9th, 2005 at 1:16 pm [Reply]

     This is Josh reads the comics. . . Get yer own blog if you want to do this.

     I hope that Josh is ok and hasn’t had to be taken anywhere in an AIR EVAC HELICOPTER

     As for the rest of you, patience. . .

216. J.Po
     May 9th, 2005 at 1:33 pm [Reply]

     You don’t suppose Josh was out for a ride with Fay Begler, do you? She was such a good driver…very competent!

217. RememberByronFrost
     May 9th, 2005 at 1:34 pm [Reply]

     I think Josh is taking lessons so he can hold his own against that card-sharp Hutch Renfro!

     The reason it’s taking so long is he’s gotta get that flat-top hairstyle down so that he can really fit in with the cool kids from Milford.

     “Southside, Brah! Slip me some Benjamins Geees.”

218. Anne Nonymous
     May 9th, 2005 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

     Maybe Josh just hasn’t seen any comics he feels are worth his inestimable comments lately. Perhaps we need to engineer a coup at the comics’ publishers.

219. Anne Nonymous
     May 9th, 2005 at 1:40 pm [Reply]

     Or, maybe his fiancee is keeping him “too busy” to comment. More Cialis, mule!

220. valiant
     May 9th, 2005 at 1:42 pm [Reply]

     “More Cialis, mule!”

     Classic!!

221. barrett
     May 9th, 2005 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

     Anyone see today’s (Monday’s) Family Circus? “Behold, I have become Billy, destroyer of worlds!”

222. RememberByronFrost
     May 9th, 2005 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

     On the same wave length Anne… was thinking, Uh oh! what if Josh accidentally got into studly Dr. Jeff’s stash and became one of the ‘rare instances’ of side effects where it lasts longer than 4 hours and you have to ’see your physician’? Hate when that happens!

223. RememberByronFrost
     May 9th, 2005 at 1:48 pm [Reply]

     More blue balls, Mule!

224. Oedipus's Dad
     May 9th, 2005 at 1:52 pm [Reply]

     Speaking of FC, did you see Friday’s?

     Little Billy is sitting on mom’s lap saying
     “Around Grandma I’ll just say you’re one of the world’s best mommies, okay?”

     Jesus, just what kind of sick monster is Grandmama? Couple of months ago she was jack-booting around the house making Dolly change the Bible. Now, she has poor Billy so afraid that he is running to his mom with dread in his heart. (of course he took the round about way to get there, even with dread Billy tends to wander).

     I think that there are so many issues just under the surface of the FC home, just one of these days a shotgun is going to make an untimely appearance.

225. Rich
     May 9th, 2005 at 2:01 pm [Reply]

     ‘Sokay. We read the comics so Josh doesn’t have to.

226. barrett
     May 9th, 2005 at 2:03 pm [Reply]

     Oedipus’s Dad –
     There was a Quantum Leap episode many yars ago where the dainty ladylike grandmother was testifying in a trial about how someone had been shot, and was expected to just add background info ended her testimony with the phrase, “And that’s when I picked up the shotgun..”

     it’ll happen in Family Circus by December. Mark my words.

227. PB
     May 9th, 2005 at 2:09 pm [Reply]

     Oh My God!

     Fence Post Frank found out Josh was using his image to sell cheap hats without cutting FPF into the profits and without his clearance.

     Someone call in the AIR EVAC HELICOPTER before it is too late or Josh will be reading the obituaries, so we don’t have to.

228. RememberByronFrost
     May 9th, 2005 at 2:12 pm [Reply]

     Let’s hope Josh has PREPAID FUNERAL INSURANCE!

229. Sir H C
     May 9th, 2005 at 3:04 pm [Reply]

     I think there should be a Josh fill in for these extended breaks (trying to live la vie de Chuck?)

     Years back I saved a “Family Circus” where Dolly was telling a visitor that the kids had their own rooms but mommy had to sleep with daddy. 10 years later, the same strip appeared with a different drawing. That and the FC with Dolly getting an F in sex are classics.

230. Anne Nonymous
     May 9th, 2005 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

     Why does everyone in Gil Thorp (and “death to him and his ilk”) look like the walking dead? More zombies, mule!

231. daChipster
     May 9th, 2005 at 3:43 pm [Reply]

     Apt 3G has TOUCHED me!

     A truly compassionate and up-to-date teaching institution would recognize the signs of A.D.D. in LuAnn, even though she is an adult.

     I know this because, yes, daChipster has A.D.D., diagnosed late as an adult. It answered a lot of questions and soothed some frustration. Ritalin is like an Underdog Super Energy Pill for this Shoeshine Boy.

     Lucky for me I’m not a blonde, or I NEVER would’ve been diagnosed.

     I SOOO hope that’s where this is going, especially because of another drug that sometimes is used to treat it:

     More Crystal Meth, MULE!

232. daChipster
     May 9th, 2005 at 4:02 pm [Reply]

     WoW! I just walked back through all the comments and I’m truly flattered to have been mentioned as part of the Junta. I think you all know how thrilled I’d be to work *under* I-girl.

     And if no one else has nominated him, I think fuzzmaster should be shortlisted as well.

     But before we go around blowing white smoke and shouting “habemus curmudgeum”:

     seriously, I think it’s a little cruel to be kicking Josh to the curb – I’ll bet he’s just having trouble keeping up with the comics AND picking the comment of the week from among Sooooo many – but even if he’s just completely being lazy and all I have no beef with that. Sure, my entire life is devoted refreshing this board every 5 minutes, but it’s not HIS fault I’m a complete loser with A.D.D!

     His entire oeuvre stands unchallenged. I can be funny now and again, but nowhere near as consistently and prolifically as the one, the only Comics Curmudgeon.

     That having been said, dibs on the hat concession.

     Oh, and dibs on picking the comment of the fortnight, er, I mean, week.

233. fluffytufts
     May 9th, 2005 at 4:02 pm [Reply]

     Does the author/artist/idiot at Gil Thorpe (oh yeah – er, “Death to Gil Thorpe”) actually think he’s hip and up-to-date? How about Mark Trail? Has Ellrod stepped out of “Father Knows Best” re-runs even once in the past 20 years? Hate, hate, hate them all. Oy.

234. fluffytufts
     May 9th, 2005 at 4:04 pm [Reply]

     That was just a quick vent – sorry.

235. Sassy_Rocks
     May 9th, 2005 at 4:07 pm [Reply]

     Of all the people to lean on in her moment of pain, Momzilla ends up confiding in a nosy, meddling, busy-body old hag like Mary Worthless. Oh well, perhaps Momzilla and Dr. Jeff will get along. Mary is still obsessed with her beloved departed husband and hasn’t been providing for Dr. Jeff’s carnal needs. I’m not sure how much bumping and grinding Momzilla’s frail body can stand, though…

236. islamorada girl
     May 9th, 2005 at 4:21 pm [Reply]

     Smitty–I’m yours for life! Gil Thorp’s head on a pike was priceless! Thank you so much for that screen-spew! If this were my blog, which it is most assuredly not, that would be comment of the week, and some hideous prize would be awarded like a knick-knack cermanic wide- eyed kid or something equally tasteless, a la the Washpost Style Invitational.

     This blog is Josh’s and the fullness thereof.
     I just hope he’s off having fun, and nothing that requires insurance. Has anyone heard anything from him in real life? We need our Evil Overlord back!

     I’m too incompetent to run a pencil sharpener, let alone a blog, but I love the compliments.

     When I coup someone’s etat, I want to become dictator of some armpit country so I can install democracy, education, jobs and UNIVERSAL HEALTH COVERAGE!

     Oh,and my monkey says “Death to Gil Thorp”.
     We both thank you.

237. Anne Nonymous
     May 9th, 2005 at 4:24 pm [Reply]

     “habemus curmudgeum”- all right, Chipster, that had me blowing Diet Pepsi out my nose. Good one! Maybe you, I-girl, Sassy, RememberBF, et al, can at least be in the Comics College of Cardinals. I do think that the I-girl should be The Grand Inquisitor, though (oops, sorry, the Vatican doesn’t call it that any more). No doubt about it, we’re all going to Hell.

238. krispy kreme
     May 9th, 2005 at 4:36 pm [Reply]

     Let’s just say I hear it on good authority that Josh is roadside. Soooo roadside that he’s resting up.

     Ok, that’s not true. Really the secret door to the Bat Cave is jammed and he can’t get to his computer until Alfred shows up to announce there’s a call from the Commissioner.

239. Adouble
     May 9th, 2005 at 4:38 pm [Reply]

     I thought today’s (Monday’s) Boondocks was pretty funny for a comic that involved almost no movement and a lot of small text. I think MrGruder et al. is far enough past the election to be funny again, rather than just really, really angry. However, it wouldn’t surprise me if a lot of people hate it still. Last time I posted a Boondocks stip I found funny, someone responded sounding really, really angry.

240. J.Po
     May 9th, 2005 at 4:46 pm [Reply]

     You know, I’m not so sure that I miss Josh — since we’re all pretty darned entertaining — as much as I hate going to the site and seeing Berna starting back at me every time. Less Berna, Mule!

241. daChipster
     May 9th, 2005 at 4:47 pm [Reply]

     You’re right, Anne, she would be called prefect of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith

     …Of Comics…

     or POTCFTDOTFOC

     Meanwhile WHAT IS UP WITH MARK TRAIL?

     Does everyone in that podunk town just take strangers at face value? No ID, not even a business card?

     “Hello, Sheriff, I’m ummm Bob Crane of the errr ACME Insurance Company! (Yeah, ACME, that’s the ticket!) And I’m looking for a really, really valuable diamond-studded collar!”

     This con man was brought up on Hogan’s Heroes and Roadrunner reruns.

     “Oh, pay no attention to this FIREARM, Mark! It’s just I saw your yesterday’s installment, and I’m worried about the GIANT SQUIRRELS! By the way, you didn’t happen to Google ACME Insurance, now did you? Good! Let’s go find the jewels!”

     meep! meep!

242. Incident
     May 9th, 2005 at 4:58 pm [Reply]

     Okay, I’m gonna do the unthinkable and DEFEND Gil Thorp for a moment here. At least he’s trying to get down with the kids and understand their crazy musical stylings. Compare that to ‘Curtis’ or ‘Herb and Jamaal’ where they’re always telling us to “turn that rap noise down.”

243. Anne Nonymous
     May 9th, 2005 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

     Incident, one more comment defending Gil Thorp (death to him), and we’ll have to excommunicate you from the Comics College of Cardinals (hereinafter to be known as the Komix Kollege of Kardinals).

244. J.Po
     May 9th, 2005 at 5:10 pm [Reply]

     What’s up with Bob Crane’s hat? I assume it’s supposed to be a wool winter hat but it seems to be way too small. Looks like a yarmulke with a pom-pom on top.

     Wait…what is it I see in the sky…BLACK smoke? Sorry, Incident. Death to Gil Thorp.

245. Adouble
     May 9th, 2005 at 5:24 pm [Reply]

     Wait, Anne wants the cool kids table to be called the KKK? And nobody has a problem with this? This truly is like the high school I went to.

246. Moesy
     May 9th, 2005 at 5:26 pm [Reply]

     Death to Gil Thorpe!

247. Other_Sally
     May 9th, 2005 at 5:27 pm [Reply]

     I say we set up a committee. I can do the updates on “Mary Worth”–that “How enviable!” comment alone is worth an entry. Someone else can take Mark Trail, Gil Thorpe, Sally Forth, et al. You gotta be organized in this business.

248. Moesy
     May 9th, 2005 at 5:30 pm [Reply]

     Yeah, let’s keep the “C’s.” Comics College of Commentators. I don’t really want to be a Cardinal. Celibacy doesn’t sound fun to me.

249. Anne Nonymous
     May 9th, 2005 at 5:38 pm [Reply]

     Okay, let’s go with the new “C’s,” Moesy. I agree, celibacy does not become us. But can we still wear the red beanies?

250. Sourbelly
     May 9th, 2005 at 6:10 pm [Reply]

     Rememeber way back, a few weeks ago, when everyone was astounded that we reached 100 comments? The next comment here is #250.

251. J.Po
     May 9th, 2005 at 6:15 pm [Reply]

     Hey, it’s OUR college, and we can make whatever rules about Celibacy, Roadsideness, Tent-Pitching, etc. (not to mention other sins such as Envy, Meddling, and Coveting Comic Characters)that we want, can’t we?

     I think it might be apropos if our beanies had propellers or something, though. Or were at least better-looking than Bob Crane’s. Wait – maybe our beanies can just have JACK ELROD embroidered on them?

252. daChipster
     May 9th, 2005 at 6:46 pm [Reply]

     I’ve GOT it: The Comics Inquisition!

     Because, you know, no one EXPECTS the Comics Inquisition!

     Our greatest weapon is funny. Funny and surprise. Our TWO greatest weapons are funny and surprise… and an almost fanatical devotion to the Curmudgeon–

     Three! Our three greatest weapons are funny, surprise, an almost fanatical devotion to the Curmudgeon…and the ability to eject beverages through our nostrils.

     AMONG our weapons are such diverse elements as…

253. Anne Nonymous
     May 9th, 2005 at 6:52 pm [Reply]

     Don’t forget…. the comfy chair!

254. daChipster
     May 9th, 2005 at 7:04 pm [Reply]

     P.S. 13 y.o. daChipster IV contributed the beverage spewing portion of the last post.

     *sniff* We raised him right. I’m so proud of our little class clown! I vote his contribution to be Comment of the Decade.

     Remember, kids: Nepotism is a very important aspect of ANY coup d’etat!

255. islamorada girl
     May 9th, 2005 at 7:15 pm [Reply]

     No one expects the pillows! Lots of fluffy pillows!

     I had a coupla glasses a wine after I finished up today, and I just wanna say you all are the funniest people in the universe and my new best friends and oh, hell. You are all comic royalty. There, I said it. You are all blog worthy. Our college should give degrees in comic genius!

     And I want to be High Priestess, please. My beanie should have a little pike on top, with Gil Thorp’s dead head, complete with plane landing just like my homey Smitty Smedlap’s photo.

     Waiting for Josh is like waiting for Godot.

     Or God. Will the J-Man come down from the mountain with two stone tabs?

     Shall we start the first Church of Crumudgeon?

     I don’t feeeel so gooood. . . it is wine on beer stay clear, or beer on wine, just fin….

256. Pookie
     May 9th, 2005 at 7:46 pm [Reply]

     Maybe Josh needs a sacrifice to appease him.

     I nominate Johnny Hart. We can toss him in a prehistoric volcano.

257. Flasshe
     May 9th, 2005 at 7:49 pm [Reply]

     ig: Waiting for Josh is like waiting for Godot.

     *Snap* More existential allusions, mule!

     I will go drink my beer and try not to wonder what was happened to our fearless leader. I have these visions running through my head of the Gil Thorp Revenge Squad, and I must quiet them.

     Death To… No! Wait! Just kidding!

258. Islamorada Girl
     May 9th, 2005 at 7:57 pm [Reply]

     Would an existentialst buy lunch or pack it?
     Camus and Satre are dead aren’t they? If they are, how can we tell?

     Damn it, Josh, you’re making us talk about philosophy! Come home!

     If you come in Josh, we left the porch light on for you. And there’s leftover Alpo casserole in the fridge. We all went to bed.

259. Jowdygirl
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:05 pm [Reply]

     Hey Josh-heads,,, glad to be back from my trip; I say chill,, our guy Josh HAS to return soon; otherwise, we would be like lost in the Matrix of Comix,,, like this is reality? Mary W is my next door neighbor,,, argggh… and lil Mim and lil Lilianna live round the corner? ??? Margo lives across the street? PLEEZE rescue me now guys! (I just watched the Matrix last night, God help me)

260. Evel Knievel
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:09 pm [Reply]

     Is this really Butte, Montana, or just existential blues?

261. Jowdygirl
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:13 pm [Reply]

     not to mention Gil Thorp nerds knocking on my door,, sheesh,, but that’s ok actually, I could prob. take em on nickel-dime poker if I give em some scotch,,, myyuhuhaha

262. Jowdygirl
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:14 pm [Reply]

     no it’s really Butte Evil

263. susie
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:18 pm [Reply]

     Clearly, Gil Thorp has had Josh “transferred.”

264. Jowdygirl
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:20 pm [Reply]

     And just so you know, I would NEVER offer booze to anyone under age, but you gotta admit the GT ‘teens’ look 30 or older, just with bad (really bad) haircuts

265. hbg
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:30 pm [Reply]

     I think Josh (and/or the future Mrs. CC) ran away from home.

     Come on back, nothing to be skeered of here!

266. Hippolyta
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:32 pm [Reply]

     Gil Thorp teenagers don’t really look 30 — what 30 year old has a perfectly flat head? I mean, geometrically, 90 degree angle flat. It can’t just be the hair. These are Frankenstein people fo’ sure.

267. hbg
     May 9th, 2005 at 8:40 pm [Reply]

     ty, or Aliens

268. Frank Drackman
     May 9th, 2005 at 9:07 pm [Reply]

     Does anyone remember the particulars of Grandpas death in “the Family Circus”?? There had to have been some funny scenes of the family at the funeral home and such.

269. Islamorada Girl
     May 9th, 2005 at 10:02 pm [Reply]

     Should we put Josh’s picture on a milk carton?

270. Islamorada Girl
     May 9th, 2005 at 10:04 pm [Reply]

     I bet we can make it to 300.

271. el st ruby
     May 9th, 2005 at 10:19 pm [Reply]

     I suspect that you’re right.

     Perhaps the time has come for haiku:

     Oh Josh? He’s not here -
     he no longer loves us here
     i need my damn fix

272. Islamorada Girl
     May 9th, 2005 at 10:31 pm [Reply]

     Every day, Berna glares
     Josh has disappeared, gone
     We yearn– new comics, mule!

273. Luban
     May 9th, 2005 at 10:37 pm [Reply]

     Hey, I kinda liked “Komix Kollege of Kardinals.” Reminds me of Krusty’s Klown Kollege.

274. PizzaBagel
     May 9th, 2005 at 11:46 pm [Reply]

     Once Rita breaks into Meddlin’ Mary’s liquor cabinet, it’s gonna take a SWAT team to flush her outta the guest bedroom. Not enviable!

     Re comment 226: Presuming the worst, that Fence Post Frank smacked Josh upside the head with a 2×4, the Air-Evac Helicopter will have to stay on the helipad for now – but ready for takeoff. First things first: Get Abbey the Wonder Dog to seek him out. Bark! Bark!

     What happens when the comment count hits 999? Let’s find out. POST! POST! POST! …

275. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:16 am [Reply]

     More blogging, mule!

276. GilmoreGuy
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:04 am [Reply]

     HAIKU

     Morning toast in hand
     I read Ziggy first of all
     That is not funny

     Quarter after four
     Billy should be home from school
     Dotted line says “NO!”

     Here’s what I wonder…
     Who thinks Bil Keane is funny?
     Not Me! Ida Know!

     There’s not too much worse
     Than having Mary Worth get
     All up in my grill

     Awww, isn’t that cute
     Garfield ate the lasagna
     See that coming? No.

     The Weekly World News
     Told of baby with square head
     Gil Thorp, you ol’ dawg

277. Luban
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:22 am [Reply]

     Looks like MW and RMMD are moving on parallel tracks now, with Mary ready to take in the familyless Momzilla and the Morgans ready to take in the familyless Buckster. They must be following the lead of those saintly doctors who adopted Little Orphan Mim. At least we know they’ll all be getting their HEALTH INSURANCE now.

     Meanwhile, on (Death to) Gil Thorp… oh, what a tangled web we wizzeave, B to the Rent! See what happens when a suburban white boy tries to manufacture street cred? Does the name Robert Van Winkle ring any bells?

278. Charles
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:21 am [Reply]

     A haiku for Gil Thorp:

     I hate this so much
     I’m going to come over to
     your house and kill you

279. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:15 am [Reply]

     Well, Meddling Mary and Momzilla actually got as far as the building door today! A small step for the comics, a giant step for mankind.

     Meanwhile over in RMMD, “Sarah, Daddy and I know you always wanted a brother to play with.. .” Abby: Grrrrrr!

     And over in Mark Trail, Bob Crane’s beanie continues to attract that large, nomless bird.
     Maybe it will pick ole Bob up and carry him away to its huge nest in the mountains as chick food, thus making Mark’s right hook unnecessary. And we all know there will be a right hook. Big clue Bob’s up to No Good: he’s carrying a firearm.

280. yellojkt
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:46 am [Reply]

     FBOFW Alert: Coy, uncomfortable, off-color reference to mattress dancing. This sort of innuendo is unbecoming from a couple that waited til their wedding night.

     Death to Gil Thorp! Heil Josh! But first, a little roo-roo!

281. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:54 am [Reply]

     Speaking of roo-roo, didja ever notice that Mark Trail will do anything, and I mean anything to get away from his family? I mean, here he is, unpaid, trekking through the woods with a highly suspicious Acme Insurance Guy looking for a jeweled collar in a wilderness, which has got to be the most uselss waste of activity in the world, rather than staying home and being a husband and father. Is he a workaholic? Why does Cherry put up with his crap for one minute? He’ll go off with anything that’s breathing with a penis rather than do the family thing. Roadside roo-roo? I wonder. On the other hand, maybe he’s an abusive wife beater and they’re happy when he’s gone. You never know.

282. cider
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:55 am [Reply]

     Yes — FBOFW was very disturbing today. And I followed up with a visit to Luann, which… ew. It has to be seen to be believed.

283. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:58 am [Reply]

     PS. I would not be one bit surprised to find one of those woosy wolves wearing that collar.
     And yes, death to Gil Thorp. Thank you.

284. Battlefield Streaker
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:02 am [Reply]

     Wow, I don’t read for a couple o’ days and look what I miss! Josh is off in sputt-blubb Egypt, so there’s a revolution in progress, and we’re closin’ in on 300 comments! And Bob Crane might be a bad guy??!!

     And now it seems that wrapping up a stranger’s pus-encrusted hand qualifies them for family status. Now they can add Buck to their Health Insurance.

     I just can’t keep up.

     And in case anyone hasn’t said it yet – Death to Gil Thorp!

285. Battlefield Streaker
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:08 am [Reply]

     I agree about Luann today. Very disturbing.

     More dominatrix innuendo, mule!

286. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:21 am [Reply]

     Actual Mark Trail Comment Today: I might want to do a story about this accident, the dog and the missing collar will make it very interesting!

     Actual daChipster Comment Today: Now THAT’S an optimist!

     Unintentional Comics Irony: Catch it!

287. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:29 am [Reply]

     Holy Coinky-dink! Check out today’s non-Sequitur:

     A disappointed Pope wannabe?

     Or a frustrated member of the Komix Kollege of Kardinals who go left off our Junta list?

288. Monkeys Uncle
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:43 am [Reply]

     FBOFW: What Micheal is really thinking…

     “We can sleep on the bed Dee. I just cant crawl on top of you and make more babys until I fix the bed frame”

     ewwww!

     RMMD:

     “Bark!, Bark!, Bark!”

     “What are you trying to say Abbey?”
     “Death to Gil Thorpe…?”

     “Grrrr!”

289. 2fs
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:47 am [Reply]

     Re hot cartoon characters: I think it’s clear there’s only one reason Michael from FBOFW puts up with his excruciating brats…and today’s strip, suggesting what’s always on his mind, confirms it.

290. Joe D.
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:51 am [Reply]

     Now that Josh is gone, let’s all start a comics commune. If Josh ever comes back he can be our leader. (I’ve already found several leader beans for my collection.) At the cult… I mean commune, we’ll just talk about how awes… I mean stupid Gil Thorp is.

     I see the makings of a reality show here people, and I really have nothing better to do (besides my “job” of course).

291. Joe D.
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:59 am [Reply]

     Oh… my… god.

     “B-TO-THE-RENT!”???

     I can’t believe that Gil betrayed me this soon after I defended him and proposed a comics commune dedicated to him. I apologize for every pro-Gil Thorp thing I’ve said in the past, and I now join the headhunt for the elusive coach of the Milford Whatever-they-ares.

292. Battlefield Streaker
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:01 am [Reply]

     In Islamorada there lived a young maid,
     To whom compliments often were paid
     Despite all the wine,
     She filled in just fine
     While Josh is off getting laid!

293. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:29 am [Reply]

     This proves nature abhors a vacuum. Anarchy now.

     If it is going to be a bunch of Cardinals, do it old school when that whole celebacy thing was not inforced.

294. J. Lurking
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:35 am [Reply]

     You know, Josh is probably just lurking around here, just waiting to see what people Really think of him. Seems that anarchy is starting to rule and he will not be happy with us on his “return.”

295. Abbey
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:39 am [Reply]

     In regards to today’s RMMD:

     Ok, June, you are the only family Buck has got. In our time, you got a letter to mail to Mommy months and months ago, so we may have forgotten. In YOUR time, it was last night.

     You better stop with all the tequila shots at night, your memeory is shot. Good thing you have me around to remind you to feed widdle Sara.

     BARK! BARK! BARK!

296. Adouble
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:45 am [Reply]

     Props to GilmoreGuy for using the phrase “Gil Thorp, you ol’ dawg”. Anti-props for being named “GilmoreGuy”, unless that isn’t a reference to the “Gilmore Girls”, but a reference to you wanting more Gil Thorp. In that case, double props.

297. Flasshe
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:49 am [Reply]

     Was Mrs. Morgan sporting a leather miniskirt in today’s RMMD?!? That one’s going up on the Wall of June. The shrine grows.

298. Abbey
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:59 am [Reply]

     Don’t worry June, I will protect you from the people who dedicate shrines to comic strip characters.

     BARK! BARK! BARK!

     At least it is not a shrine to Helga Horrible, who has also been known to wear leather skirts.

     Almost 300!

     Awhooooooooooooooooooooo

299. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:01 am [Reply]

     I like the idea of a comix commune. I’m in. We all sit around reading, discussing & debating comics all day. I can finally quit my job. We’re all happy. In the spirit of RMMD, we can take 2 week naps, & like MW, we can feed on Alpo Casserole. Josh would have to be the leader, if he ever returned, but perhaps we could just exist in anarchy until then. No leader=No rules.

300. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:07 am [Reply]

     Sir H C: “Nature abhors a vacuum”

     Yep, vacuums suck!

     How many people are poised with their finger above “At long last, say it” with the simple message “300!”

301. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:10 am [Reply]

     Sheesh June, get a clue! Now is NOT the time to go adopting a pus-encrusted vagrant with bad B.O. He’s about to run up a $500,000 hospital bill for Christ sake! (Duh, did you forget he has NO HEALTH INSURANCE ?)

302. Abbey
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:13 am [Reply]

     300

     BARK!

303. Josh'sEvilTwin
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:14 am [Reply]

     300

304. Josh'sEvilTwin
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:14 am [Reply]

     Dammit

     WOOF !

305. marnivore
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:21 am [Reply]

     More Comics Inquisition, mule!
     Death to Gil Thorp.

306. slobocrock
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:24 am [Reply]

     Please dont leave me behind!! I want to be with the comics cult…I mean “commune”….when the comet comes around for us! Blondie will be there, right?

307. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:24 am [Reply]

     I have a window opened with 400 ready to go.

308. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:25 am [Reply]

     As Flasshe (among others, possibly) previously alluded to, poor Josh probably had a stroke trying to decide on “comment of the week.”

     And judging by 300+ comments, Mark Trail isn’t the ONLY one shirking his responsibilities, eh guys?

     More nomless birds, Mule!

309. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:30 am [Reply]

     Umm…Seriously: Does anybody out there actually *know* Josh? Are we sure he’s okay? This is making me nervous! It’s like that time in high school when the substitute teacher left the room and NEVER CAME BACK!

310. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:38 am [Reply]

     I don’t actually know him but I have his e-mail addy. Will let you know if I get a reply.

311. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:38 am [Reply]

     If you have a last name, I can probably find out. I think I am relatively local given his Baltimore Sun fixation.

312. sally
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:41 am [Reply]

     Wow, 300+! This goes back at least forty posts, but I just had to say how happy it makes me to see a reference to the Existential Blues. Poppies! Poppies! Poppies!

313. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:44 am [Reply]

     His last name is at the bottom of the page Sir H C. Joshua Fruhlinger.

     Good luck and keep us “posted”.

314. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:47 am [Reply]

     I think the future Mrs Curmudgeon, knowing that we’re friendless, brainless, helpless, hopeless and unemployed in Greenland would have found a way to let us know if anything had befallen our fearless leader.

     I hope he wasn’t foolish enough to go in against a Sicilian when death was on the line. Or worse, get involved in a land war in Asia.

315. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:47 am [Reply]

     I know he and the Divine Ms.Amber live in Balto.

     Do you think they ran off and got married?

     Don’t make us go to Balto. looking for you, dude. I’ll have to call Don and Marty and get an APB out on you!

316. Cancer Man
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:47 am [Reply]

     There is no Josh! He was made up by the United Features Syndicate et al to revive interest in dying strips: ie Gil Thorpe, Mark Trail, Rex Morgan MD, Mary Worth, APT 3G etc etc etc

     More conspiracies, mule.

317. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:54 am [Reply]

     Hope he’s not searching for WMD’s somewhere.

318. Widdle Sara
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:54 am [Reply]

     I’ll get you, my little pretty, and your little dog Toto too!

     But I don’t even have a little dog Toto.

     All I have is my dog Abbey, and she burns the toast.

319. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:56 am [Reply]

     “we’re friendless, brainless, helpless, hopeless and unemployed in Greenland”

     but at least we’re funny (or think we are.)

     I’m pretty sure that Josh is only mostly dead. All he needs is a miralce pill with chocolate coating (makes it go down easier.)

320. Smitty Smedlap
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:59 am [Reply]

     I.G — thanks for the props!

     I’m hoping that Momzilla DOES move into Charterstone, and I’ll bet Wilbur Weston is too. That hairy-knuckled bastard just loves to prey on vulnerable women — just look at how he swooped in on Tommy’s mom after Tommy got hauled off to the big house. Once he gets a whiff of Rita’s freshly-minted grief, I’ll bet he drops Iris like a bag of Tommy’s bad “stuff.”

321. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:00 am [Reply]

     This may be the height of hubris, but I wonder if anyone in the comic strip world is actually paying attention to this site.

     Seriously, where else can you find such an anatomization of these people’s work?

     Having worked for middle management for most of my middling so-called career, I can just imagine some pencil-necked geek sitting across from Jack Elrod at Jack’s annual review:

     Seriously, Jack, we’d like to renew, but the pushback on the giant animals is really strong. And you’ve written 32 weeks worth of strips that equate to 1 week elapsed time in your story.

     These Curmudgeon people are just blasting you. Accordingly, we’re only renewing you on a provisional basis, and at a 30% cut. Kill off Colonel Hogan and the Mystery of the Missing Collar in 2 weeks, and if that Islam Dorito Girl slams you one more time, I’m Trumping your a$$ outta here.

322. E.T.
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:04 am [Reply]

     Give him a break! Maybe he went on vacation on something…

323. J.Po
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:09 am [Reply]

     Maybe Josh is behind the door at Meddlin’ Mary’s modest two-bedroom condo apartment? If not, I propose an emergency intervention by the Kollege of Komix Kardinals in Baltimore, pronto. I can be there in 90 minutes. Islamorada, I can pick up some beer and wine for our Komix Kommunion service.

     (Funny, my wife mentioned at dinner last night, “one day, we’re going to come home from work and school and see dad’s computer gone, and a note on his desk, saying ‘I’ve run off to join the comics’.”)

     Speaking of MW, a lovely comment by the Queen of Heavy Meddle today … translation: “your daughter is dead, you’ve got a drinking problem, you clearly have no friends (as evidenced by the fact you’re here with ME prepping for a threesome with Josh), you envy my home…but how’s that poorly-located hovel of yours working out for you?”

324. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:13 am [Reply]

     … that poorly-located hovel with the black walls and pink curtains…

325. J.Po
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:23 am [Reply]

     …and the shapely urn containing your daughter’s remains, now made into a lamp. Oh, the fresh grief!

326. Concerned
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:24 am [Reply]

     BARK! BARK! BARK!

     What’s that Abbey, Josh has fallen down a well?

     C’mon gang, times a wastin, we have to go save Josh.

     Someone call for the AIR EVAC HELICOPTER!

327. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:28 am [Reply]

     “that Islam Dorito Girl”? *Giggle* *snort*! DaChipster is too much!

328. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:31 am [Reply]

     Hold on thar! I ain’t callin NOBODY til we find out if Josh has ….. you know.

329. J.Po
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:36 am [Reply]

     Has what, Kardinal RBF?

     BLOG INSURANCE?!?!?!

330. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:39 am [Reply]

     Haaaahaaa – Good one Kardinal J.Po !

331. freehuey
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:41 am [Reply]

     I say we get Mark Trail on the mystery of the missing Josh . . . you know in about 3 months, after the whole diamond collar thing wraps up. What kinds of wildlife are indiginous to Baltimore?

332. J.Po
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:47 am [Reply]

     Orioles, of course. And very tasty crabs. We will definitely need some beer for this job. RUN TO FELLS POINT!

333. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:47 am [Reply]

     Wildlife in Baltimore is mainly rats and tree rats (often called squirrels by those who don’t deal with them). Actually there is a tree of crows that I always liked. They would all sleep over some rube’s car and in the morning the car would be plastered with droppings to the point where you could not see out the windows.

334. Flasshe
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:57 am [Reply]

     400! Woo hoo! Hopefully I timed that right…

     Day Six of JoshWatch. We now join correspondent RememberByronFrost, somewhere near Baltimore…

335. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:18 am [Reply]

     What about ravens? Are they indiginous to Baltimore? Or did Poe import them?

336. E.A. Poe
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:24 am [Reply]

     When shall we see Josh again?

     Nevermore

337. Time Waster
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:25 am [Reply]

     Just adding comments to get the total nearer to 400.

     C’mon people, we are inane enough to do it.

338. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:28 am [Reply]

     Top 10 Reasons to join the Comics Commune:

     10: All comics, all the time.
     9: We get to learn (or make up) the meaning of words like “Sputt,” “Blubb,” and “Roo-roo”
     8: Cool catch phrases: “More zippers, mule!”
     7: Regular Comic Slang lessons.
     6: Natural disaster survival tips from Mark Trail himself-Run to High Ground!
     5: In the Commics Commune, you can laugh at your computer monitor without coworkers giving you odd looks.
     4: Comic hotties like Buck from RMMD &/or Blondie show up to give comic lectures.
     3: Why not, who wants to live in Baltimore with tree rats, when you can live in comic land with giant tree rats.
     2: Death to Gil Thorpe could be our mantra.
     And the #1 reason to join the comics commune: You get to follow our missing leader Josh & hand out with witty & charming people like IGirl, RBF, daChipster, Flasshe…and the list goes on!

339. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:28 am [Reply]

     More top 10 lists, Mule!

340. another country heard from
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:37 am [Reply]

     You guys here at the Waiting for Josh Conspiracy are SICK (don’t let it go to your heads). Give Josh credit for having set this rollicking finely-tuned merry-go-round in motion.

     But yet . . . his true genius was leaving y’all to careen onward under your own power. I suspect Josh is just waiting out there somewhere to see how long his insane creation can sustain itself. 400 posts? 4,000??? The force is within you, young Jedis.

341. Anne Nonymous
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:48 am [Reply]

     The Phelps-Fogarty thing in Luann today is definitely eeeeuww. Next, Ms. Phelps brings out the whips, chains, and long black leather boots and turns into “Dominatrix Girl.” Apropos of nothing, I was touring around the Houston Chronicle Comics site and happened upon “Agnes,” then had to go to the Toonville site to check out past strips. What does anyone know about this strip? This kid is weird. Why are her feet as long as her body? Is that friend of hers a girl, or a boy with a ponytail? I’m thinking, girl, but, who knows?

342. Nik
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:52 am [Reply]

     Wow, this is like watching a snake eat its own head….

343. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:56 am [Reply]

     Once upon a Tuesday dreary,
     While we blogged on, tired and weary
     Debating the current whereabouts of Josh,
     As we chatted, neatly tapping
     Comments about Gil Thorp’s rapping,
     Rapping many an alien phrase to make us toss,
     “Death to him (Gil Thorp),” we mutter,
     As we, seething, imprecations utter,
     And gleefully we ponder his demise!

     But at our desks, our souls do stutter,
     Where’s the one who minds the rudder?
     Has our beloved Curmudgeon “left the store?”
     Are we left behind, like roadside foobs,
     To wander, rootless, blog-less rubes
     Through comics unexamined, unexplored?
     Quoth Abby:
     “Bark! Bark!”
     (“Nevermore”)

344. Abbey
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:56 am [Reply]

     Ten reasons we kill time here:

     10. Fence Post Frank fills our life with dread

     9. Mark Trail fills in those Irwin Allen moments

     8. Mim lives in the real world of un-wed motherdom

     7. Grandmama from FC REQUIRES that we read this blog

     6. Gwampa may go to Farley’s reward, and we want to be there for that

     5. Gil Thorpe MUST die.

     4. 9CWL is going totally roadside.

     3. Opus might learn that he is no longer funny.

     2. Baby Blues IS NOT existential.

     1. Call in the AIR EVAC HELICOPTER

     BARK! BARK! BARK!

345. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:01 pm [Reply]

     Once upon a workday dreary
     As I pondered weak and weary
     Over many a fun and witty
     Comment from the comix corps

     As I nodded madly giggling
     Over all our trivial niggling
     Suddenly there came a jiggling
     Of the handle on my door

     ‘Tis my boss! I gasped in panic
     Jiggling my office door
     Oh that guy is SUCH a bore!

     Ah how clear I see the day
     In the merry month of May
     And the lilacs were so gay
     Growing outside my back door

     Eagerly I wished the weekend
     For my days had really bleakened
     My fun had come to an oblique end
     Since that day the week before

     Since that day that Josh departed
     Like the career of Albert Gore
     Gone away, in Baltimore

     Anyway, the handle rattled
     As my emotions battled
     Had a coworker of mine tattled
     Some meddler on the floor?

     As I turned a shade of green
     And closed the comic screen
     I wondered who had seen
     And I opened up the door

     A dog was there, and nothing more!

     Emotionally flabby
     And feeling kind of crabby
     I still knew that this was Abbey
     Come to tell me of the score

     Did Josh fall down a well?
     Is this the board’s death knell?
     Oh please, dear Abbey, tell!
     Quoth the puppy:

     BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK!

     (Stupid dog!)

346. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:02 pm [Reply]

     fluffytufts you are my hero. Way better than any top 10 list I could’ve proposed. Amazing Poe-ness!

347. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:02 pm [Reply]

     You too, daChipster!

348. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:02 pm [Reply]

     Curse you, fluffytufts, you beat me to the same damn punchline!

     hahahahahaha

     this is scary

349. J.Po
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:03 pm [Reply]

     fluffytufts, you ROCK!

     Thankfully, I have made the conscious decision to not consume any liquids before reading posts, for the sake of my computer and my Kardinalian vestments (the dry cleaner charges extra for these and I don’t have SPIT-TAKE INSURANCE ).

350. Battlefield Streaker
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:06 pm [Reply]

     I stand in awe of post #341!
     Definitely “Comment of the week” material!

351. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:07 pm [Reply]

     DaChipster – you’ve got more time on your hands than even I do! Honestly, do any of us get any work done!?

352. Anne Nonymous
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:10 pm [Reply]

     fluffytufts and daChipster, you guys rock! You are both my new gods.

353. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:12 pm [Reply]

     It’s not so much the time
     It’s just I’ve found that I’m
     Able to quickly rhyme
     And turn aything to verse

     Some may think that this is hot
     To be like Sir Mixalot
     But I’m here to say it’s not
     a blessing it’s a curse.

354. Anne Nonymous
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:13 pm [Reply]

     P.S. I’m going to get carpal tunnel syndrome from scrolling down to the end of these comments, if the list gets any longer. Fortunately, I have HEALTH INSURANCE.

355. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:14 pm [Reply]

     NOT ME
     IDA KNOW

356. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:16 pm [Reply]

     Post #353 in response to #349 not getting any work done…. NOT to Anne’s comment re: H. Insurance, which TG, I also have.

     You guys really DO ROCK – what talent!!!

     How enviable!!!!!!!!!!!!!

357. Flasshe
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:20 pm [Reply]

     Excellent stuff, fluuffy and chip! Although it’s a little scary how much people here are starting to think alike…

     And I have to keep cleaning Diet Pepsi off my damn screen!

     Off to find more June pictures…

358. Abbey
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:22 pm [Reply]

     It is amazing how many people have time to waste.

     Ain’t America Grand.

     BARK! BARK! BA. . .

     ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

359. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:26 pm [Reply]

     Shucks, ya’ll. I pause to bask (HA!)…then try to figure out how to kill 4 more hours. More postings, mule!

360. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:29 pm [Reply]

     400!!! Oops – quick on the draw

361. Abbey
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:34 pm [Reply]

     359

     Talk about time and space wasters.

     bark bark bark

362. Margo
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:37 pm [Reply]

     Don’t you know where Josh has gone?

     Since Abbey, the wonder dog, went off in the AIR EVAC HELICOPTER (and into the OR too presumably), someone has had to watch over widdle Sara.

     Josh has stepped up to the plate and taken her on as his own. She is easy to care for too, one sandwitch will keep her going for weeks.

     More bologna, mule.

363. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:40 pm [Reply]

     Spew alerts needed! I just spit bottled water all over my monitor. When I have writer’s block, I come here. Obviously, I have writer’s block A LOT.

     Only two more to hit 400.

     Do I hear 500?

     Viva Josh! On to Baltimore!
     And speaking of Charm City, more crack, mule!

364. Incident
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:40 pm [Reply]

     What is with all the “taking in of strays” going on in the comics these days? The doctors adopting Mim and her baby Lusitania, the Morgans taking in a down-on-his-luck gigilo, that homeless dog crap in ‘Non Sequiter,’ and now Mary Worth shacking up with Remorseful Rita.

     I do enjoy the look of abject horror on Deanna’s face when Michael mentions marital relations. Looks like she’s been “laying back and thinking of Canada.” Oh, and needing your wife and two friends to assemble a bed? LAME.

365. Peter Griffin
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:41 pm [Reply]

     c’mon people, back to work.

     I don’t think those adult swim bumper cards are going to write themselves.

366. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:44 pm [Reply]

     Incident, my darling, how many Pattersons does it take to screw in a light bulb?

367. J.Po
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

     June: “Rex…how’s Josh?”

     Rex: “Not good…he’s in a comics coma!”

     Of all the bold-faced words in today’s RMMD, wouldn’t ya think that COMA should be at the top of the list?

368. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

     One and a two and a…

     Won’t you come home Josh baby?
     Won’t you come home?
     We moan the whole day long.

     We’ll do the bloggin Darlin
     We’ll buy some hats,
     We know we’ve done you wrong!

     ‘member that sad May 4th
     we drove you out (?)
     With nothing but an urge to roam

     We know we’re to blame
     Well, ain’t that a shame
     Josh baby won’t you please come home.

     Thank ya… I’ll be here all week.

369. Incident
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:46 pm [Reply]

     Islamadora Girl, please don’t mention Pattersons and screwing in the same sentence, I’m trying to eat.

370. Joe D.
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:46 pm [Reply]

     I’m sorry, but back to the comics. I’m utterly amazed by Gil Thorp today. “B-TO-THE-RENT!”??? Seriously? That was published? I need to draw comics for a living.

     I wish I lived in Milford. Or a comics commune. Or Baltimore so I could track down Josh. Or a comics commune called Milford in Baltimore with Josh as the leader. Now that I think of it, Josh does kind of look like the Leader from the cult episode of the Simpsons. Coincidence?

371. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

     CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP, RBF!

372. J.Po
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:51 pm [Reply]

     Can anyone get Michael Patterson Becky’s phone number and save us from this?

373. luluchappel
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:51 pm [Reply]

     Re: post #319; I, too, have been wondering if (hoping that?) some cartoonists have been monitoring this site. A lot of constructive criticism has been levied here; those guys could learn a thing or two from their readership! I don’t think there’s any hope for making Funky Winkerbean any funnier.

374. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:51 pm [Reply]

     Nyurk, nyurk, nyurk, Incident!

375. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

     With Baltimore it is:

     “More smack, mule!”

     They even gave up on their motto “The city that reads”.

376. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

     TY but can’t compare to E. A. Poe!

377. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 12:57 pm [Reply]

     OK, I gotta know…How many Pattersons DOES it take to screw in a light bulb?

378. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:00 pm [Reply]

     I was hoping, one of you, with your quick wit, would come up with an answer. I have writer’s block. I got nothin’.

     Help, Josh Heads! How many Pattersons DOES it take to screw in a light bulb? How many Mary Worths? Mark Trails? 3Gettes?

     It’s an existential question, I guess.

379. da Beckster
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

     If the Pattersons want to get screwed they call on Kortney.

380. Abbey
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:04 pm [Reply]

     377

     woof woof woof

     stop lurking and waiting for 400.

381. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:04 pm [Reply]

     How many Pattersons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

     Two: Michael and Deanna – the hard part’s gettin’ ‘em in the light bulb.

382. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:05 pm [Reply]

     How many 3-Gettes does it take to screw in a light bulb?

     2 – NotMargo Tommie and NotMargo LuAnn. Heaven knows Margo’s not gonna go so low as to screw in a light bulb. But Tommie & LuAnn are each to insignificant to be able to do it on their own.

383. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:13 pm [Reply]

     Come now at least three pattersons as mom has to get all wistful about how she hasn’t dealt with such things in so long (while possibly looking out the window with a steaming cup of coffee in front of her).

384. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:15 pm [Reply]

     How many to screw in a light bulb:

     Mark Trail: Just Mark! but it takes him 73 straight days (and 271 exclamation points!) of exposition, interspersed with nature stories, characterized by wildlife with pituitary imbalances, before he finds the ladder!

     RMMD: 5 –
     1 guy to quote the cost of screwing in the lightbulb,
     1 guy to dispute the cost and send the thief on his way
     1 to flirt with guy number 2 so he’ll do it
     1 to medevac the second guy to the hospital
     and 1 hospital administrator to deny him treatement because he has NO MEDICAL INSURANCE

     And the damn bulb still ain’t changed.

     MW: Two, one to change the bulb, and one meddlesome neighbor to invite you to lunch to help you get over the loss of the first bulb

385. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

     Gil Thorpe: 25 – 1 to change the bulb, 1 to rap about it, 3 to stand around with stupid haircuts high-fiving each other

     and 20 to chant: (ahem) Death to Gil Thorpe!

     Apt. 3G – Six billion and 1. Margo to hold the bulb, and 6 billion to revolve the planet around her.

386. Joe D.
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:22 pm [Reply]

     Five people for RMMD? What about the worthless child who eats cereal for two weeks in the house while her mother is away with the bum in the yard? What about the dog that gives coquettish looks and barks at unconscious people in tents?

387. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:23 pm [Reply]

     9 Chickweed Lane – 1 ME ME ME ME I’ll change that bulb for you, Edda! Or, if you’ve got your tango dress on, I’ll hold that ladder for you while you… wow…DA-yum!…sigh (clunk)

     Fam.Circ. Not Me. Ida Know.

388. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:25 pm [Reply]

     Buck and the Doctor
     Exchanging lustful glances
     Willing penetration

389. Joe D.
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:26 pm [Reply]

     Honestly, people. Who here has a job, and how much work is actually done?

390. Incident
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:27 pm [Reply]

     Mallard Fillmore – Lightbulbs don’t need to be changed!!!

391. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

     ooooh…love me some Edda!

392. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:29 pm [Reply]

     More hiaku:

     Hubby’s eyes ignore
     Margo’s magnificent breasts
     He prefers stubble

393. Sourbelly
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

     Sir HC, that would be a steaming cup of TEA, not coffee. A niggling point, to be sure, but it gets us one closer to 400.

     Yes, getting to 400 comments is more exciting than working.

394. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:32 pm [Reply]

     Peanuts: 1 but he keeps recycling old light bulbs that didn’t work the first time

395. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:33 pm [Reply]

     I was going to say tea, but I hadn’t been keeping up with FBOFW for a while. That usual problem of read the paper or sleep in more.

396. Hippolyta
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:35 pm [Reply]

     I don’t have a job. I’m an archaeology student writing a paper. Oops, I mean five papers. Maybe I’ll just give up and hang out in the Morgans’ back yard and flirt with Abbey.

     Needless to say, Buck is my hero. I hope he doesn’t die. I think his fence-building skills are hot.

     More erecting fences, mule!

397. Luban
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

     Don’t have good enough timing to hit the big 4-0-0. Ah well.

398. Mim
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:38 pm [Reply]

     Job???

     What’s a job? I have a doctor to take care of me and my evil spawn.

399. Sourbelly
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:38 pm [Reply]

     B.C.–none, because Johnny Hart is a real stickler when it comes to adhering to the strip’s prehistoric setting.

400. ingrate
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:39 pm [Reply]

     Josh should totally make us a discussion forum.

     A bas Gil Thorpe!

     Viva Islamorada!

401. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:40 pm [Reply]

     400 is so close & I’m wasting SOOOOO much time.

402. Monkeys Uncle
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:41 pm [Reply]

     Damn you RBF!

     I just caught myself walking around the shop humming
     “Wont you come home Rex Morgan”
     “Wont you come home…”

     This sickness is getting worse.

403. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:41 pm [Reply]

     400!

404. Monkeys Uncle
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:42 pm [Reply]

     1000…?

405. O'Really
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:43 pm [Reply]

     There once was an old light socket
     which was empty and flat as a pocket.
     It wanted a light
     but ol Mikey was tight,
     and told his kids you might as well f….

     Splut Blubb.

406. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

     No one here (at work) understands my excitement! 400+ posts! Whoo hoo!

407. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

     MW: What’s a light bulb?

408. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

     Sorry Unk! Mhuhaaahha

409. Billy Keane
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

     Too bad Josh is not like me.

     When I go wandering off, I leave a trail of dashes behind me. It makes the finding so easy.

410. Smitty Smedlap
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:46 pm [Reply]

     How many Drabbles does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

     Nobody cares.

411. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:51 pm [Reply]

     Well Ziggy just can’t reach that socket and he is sad about it.

412. Billy Graham
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:51 pm [Reply]

     How many Barney Googles does it take to screw in a light bulb?

     No one knows, they haven’t existed since the 30’s.

413. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:52 pm [Reply]

     And by Billy Graham I mean Charles Schulz’s corpse. Damn thing keeps on resetting my name.

414. snuffy smith
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:53 pm [Reply]

     we aint got none that fancy flat lander lecticity up hearn

     now hows bout you gettin yer dang burn self outta hearn so eyes ken get back to my moonshing and bloggin

415. Garfield
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:54 pm [Reply]

     I hate changing lightbulbs on Monday. Especially on an empty stomach.

416. Luann
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:56 pm [Reply]

     I can change a lightbulb by myself. But it takes me three changes of clothing and a close encounter with Gunther.

417. Cathy
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:56 pm [Reply]

     ACK!! This lightbulb makes me look fat!!

418. April
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:58 pm [Reply]

     I can change a lightbulb, but only while making some disturbingly sexual comment about “screwing” the bulb in.

419. Mr. Dithers
     May 10th, 2005 at 1:59 pm [Reply]

     GET BACK TO WORK!!!

     ALL OF YOU!!!!

     YOU SLACKERS!!!!!

420. Entire cast of Red Meat
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:00 pm [Reply]

     We’d change the bulb, but we’re all incapable of movement!

421. Mr. Foofram
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:01 pm [Reply]

     DITTO THAT DITHERS!!!!

     (or is it Dot that?)

422. luluchappel
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:01 pm [Reply]

     BC–None, because Jesus is the light of the world & he doesn’t need changing.

423. yellojkt
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:01 pm [Reply]

     Over in Chatalogical Humor, someone brought up how buxom young Alex Doonesbury is getting. Is she old enough to lust after, or is that just creepy? She is old enough to have an army recruiter chasing her around.

424. Zippy
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:02 pm [Reply]

     How many light bulbs would it take to screw us into a socket?

425. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:03 pm [Reply]

     Dagwood can’t change a bulb ’cause Herb’s got his ladder, and Blondie doesn’t need a lightbulb ’cause she’s gots thems big ol’ headlights!

426. Battlefield Streaker
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:04 pm [Reply]

     This is getting out of control!
     It’s a… it’s a TSUNAMI of comments!
     Grab your lightbulbs and run for high ground!

427. Mina
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:07 pm [Reply]

     How many Phantoms does it take to screw in a light blubb?

428. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:12 pm [Reply]

     Don’t you have to be 18 to fight, so I guess you have to be 18 to be recruited therefore she is I guess 18.

429. Sgt. Snorkel
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

     You can be under 18 to be recruited (by the Armed Forces) you just need mommy’s or daddy’s signature. Delayed entry. You do have to be 18 to actually go in. At least that is what Buck has been telling Rex all these lonely lonely nights.

430. Margo
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:23 pm [Reply]

     More lightbulbs, mule.

431. Incident
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:26 pm [Reply]

     Nancy never needs to change lightbulbs, what with her aunt’s headlights being so bright, and all.

432. Flasshe
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:36 pm [Reply]

     How many denizens of Prickly City does it take to change a light bulb?

     Two: One to change the lightbulb and one to complain about how the original lightbulb dying is due to a Left Wing Conspiracy.

433. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:41 pm [Reply]

     So mellon-like, round,
     Nice bulbs, but no screwing here –
     See Edda’s headlights.

434. Bookworm
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:47 pm [Reply]

     How many Komix Kardinals does it take to change a lightbulb?

     All of them – 1 to change the bulb, the rest to comment wittily on the action.

435. O'Really
     May 10th, 2005 at 2:49 pm [Reply]

     We came here looking to screw
     lightbulbs until we were through.
     We turned and twisted
     and flicked our wristed,
     ’til we looked like a gaggle of Schmoos.

436. Fay'sRestlessSpirit
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:05 pm [Reply]

     There once was a smart group of slackers
     Who commented on cartoonist ‘hackers’,
     to avoid working,
     while smugly smirking,
     Now they are all grocery sackers.

437. Slack Master
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:13 pm [Reply]

     Oh sure, soon as it nears 5 0′clock, and the slackers head home to their creaky dialup, the postings fall off.

438. andyrooney
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:15 pm [Reply]

     Never fails. Surely they don’t have anyone waiting for them when they get home, bunch of nerd/losers…. haaa haaa!

439. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:24 pm [Reply]

     We’re busted guys! Josh just replied to my e-mail and assures us he is alive and well and hopes to quell the brewing coup tonight !

440. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:25 pm [Reply]

     Actually – I have parakeets, so there.

441. Slack Master
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:26 pm [Reply]

     quell the brewing coup tonight

     Is that like going totally roadside on us?

442. Slack Master
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:27 pm [Reply]

     Actually – I have parakeets, so there.

     So, that would be squeaky featherups?

443. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:28 pm [Reply]

     Good name for a rock band.

444. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:28 pm [Reply]

     Home by 5pm? I wish. I guess if I wasn’t slacking…

445. J.Po
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:30 pm [Reply]

     Dare he mess with the Komix Kollege of Kardinals?

     Oh, WTF. The post number is getting so ridiculously high, pretty soon Congress will be investigating suspicions of rampant steroid abuse in the KKK. Josh needs to step forward to save us from ourselves!

     I await guidance from our supreme leader Islamorada as to what to do next…

446. Slack Master
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:33 pm [Reply]

     443

     BARK! BARK! BARK!

     We can get it to 500 before he comes back if we really try.

     BARK! BARK! BARK!

447. susie
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:34 pm [Reply]

     This is both sad and frightening. Its CHAOS in here!

     Whatever you do, don’t all panic and rush for the exit.

448. Abbey
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:35 pm [Reply]

     No no no. Not Slack Master. Bad bad slack master. You need to READ it before you say it.

     Bad boy.

449. marnivore
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:36 pm [Reply]

     Josh is going to quell the brewing coup? Run to higher ground!

450. Lil Billy
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:37 pm [Reply]

     We are so busted.

     And everyone “remember” Ida Know broke the lamp.

     OK?

451. Flasshe
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:39 pm [Reply]

     Whew! I can sleep (at my desk) easy now. Thanks for the news that our Joshy is alive and well, RBF.

     Do you suppose any newbies have read completely through this thread? And remained sane?

     More brews, mule!

452. another country heard from
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:41 pm [Reply]

     “Dare he mess with the Komix Kollege of Kardinals?”

     Any decent dictator will tell you that eternal vigilance is the price of power. Close your eyes for a second and . . . . you have a Kollective on your hands, and a brewing coup to quell.

     More Kardinals, mule!

453. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:42 pm [Reply]

     re #439 – Chirpy, rather.
     So Josh is alive? Shame on all you plotters and connivers! Quick! Hide the Golden Calf!

454. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:47 pm [Reply]

     Amazing that it keeps all comments on one page and doesn’t break after so many. So what comic was the first to have people aging in sync with reality. Peanuts did it for a short while early on, but then stopped, I put forth Gasoline Alley.

455. J.Po
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:47 pm [Reply]

     I’ll hide the diamond dog collar in June Morgan’s cupboard (or her rack). No one (save for Abbey) will ever find it there, at least until October or so.

     I believe the quote is “eternal vigilance is the price of liberty,” btw … guess it depends on whether you’re a Curmudgeonite or a Kardinal.

456. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:52 pm [Reply]

     Come now, surely we can at least reach 500. Here, I’ll provide a new topic:

     Margo’s vs. Miss Buxley: Battle of the Breasts. Discuss.

457. 2fs
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:56 pm [Reply]

     Next, in a very special Zippy the Pinhead: Zippy meets a Very Roadside Attraction…and Zerbina quells a brewing coup of sorrow with countless shots of taco sauce and kraut juice.

458. Flasshe
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:57 pm [Reply]

     No discussion of comic strip breasts would be complete without mentioning My Darling June. And that Blondie gal has them all beat…

459. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:58 pm [Reply]

     I’m sure glad Josh is alive. Wonder if HE read through this entire post without going insane. I read it all, but was a little crazy BEFORE I started.

460. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 3:59 pm [Reply]

     What about Liberty Meadows? That woman was a bit too realistic.

461. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:04 pm [Reply]

     More comments, Mules!

462. Monkeys Uncle
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:06 pm [Reply]

     Ahhh…. Brandy from Liberty Meadows

     She has got my vote.

     Bark!,Bark!,Bark!

463. J.Po
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:06 pm [Reply]

     More observations on breasts:

     1. When will Nurse Becka remove her lab coat? I think she could be a contender.

     2. Does Helen, Sweetheart of the Internet strap those pups in most days, or wear an amazing Wonderbra occasionally?

     3. Abby Ardin (Edge City). Why are they so pointy and so high? What does she use? Turnbuckles and cantilevers?

464. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:06 pm [Reply]

     We can make it to 500 before our evil overlord returns and we start a new thread!

     Glad to know Josh is okay, though. I was really worried about him!

465. Flasshe
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:07 pm [Reply]

     Yes, 2Fs. Next in FPOFW: Zippy pays a visit to Canada during his endless tour of All That Is Roadside.

     Be gone, bad mental picture, be gone! *Shudder*

466. Monkeys Uncle
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:13 pm [Reply]

     I dont htink we can rteach 500 unlesss people startyy posting hurried meaninles messeges that hacve not been proofred

467. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:15 pm [Reply]

     Death to Gil Thorpe!

468. J.Po
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:19 pm [Reply]

     Death to Gil Thorp! Followed by Fresh Grief!

469. Monkeys Uncle
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:26 pm [Reply]

     Fresh Gil Thorpe Mule!

470. another country heard from
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:30 pm [Reply]

     BARK BARK BARK

471. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

     I don’t know why, but I’m *firmly* convinced Edda over at 9 Chickweed Lane is hiding some serious sweater kittens! Yow!

472. JM
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:40 pm [Reply]

     Say what you will about Gil Thorp (death to him, by the way), he DOES show up more often than our fearless leader! (Now that we know Josh is alive, the gloves come off.)

473. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:41 pm [Reply]

     Yes Brandy. I always wondered if he was drawing her naked for his own amusement. I have heard rumors that strippers (to re-use the Bloom County term) would do such things. Universal Syndicate must be aghast.

474. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:42 pm [Reply]

     “What about Liberty Meadows? That woman was a bit too realistic.”

     You thought she was realistic? Tell me where you live; I’m moving there tomorrow.

475. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:47 pm [Reply]

     You know, whoever that is in the last posted Cathy strip has quite the chest on her. She also has a waist the size of her head, as opposed to Cathy’s Ziggy-esqe dumpiness.

     In conclusion: hot.

476. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:50 pm [Reply]

     Okay, stripper realistic. Not your average of the species but not a caracture like a Barbie doll either.

477. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:51 pm [Reply]

     She’s to young for you. Read the cartoon: “Flower Teen.” Okay, maybe she’s 18 or 19, but still…

478. another country heard from
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:54 pm [Reply]

     It’s Zenith, daughter of Cathy’s uber-feminist friend Andrea.

     More sweater kittens, Mule!

479. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:55 pm [Reply]

     Some of these are not kittens, they are full grown cats!

480. MrPerson
     May 10th, 2005 at 4:58 pm [Reply]

     This is why the Curmudgeon needs to update at least once every two or three days: To split up the comments.

     Holy Almost Five Hundred Comments, Batman!

     Maybe a message board system or something would be better than the one long comments window?

481. Sue
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:00 pm [Reply]

     Since Josh is away, I thought I’d mention a comic strip that I don’t believe has ever been discussed in this forum. It’s called “Between Friends”:
     King Features page for BF
     Anyway, it drives me absolutely batty… it’s about three insanely neurotic women in their 40s who are always complaining about how much it sucks to be in your 40s. It’s totally traumatized me about getting older. Anyone else ever seen it?

482. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:01 pm [Reply]

     I just Googled Liberty Meadows (my, does *that* sound interesting) to see what the stir was all about, and Holy Giant Man-eating Boobs, what a display! Looks more like Frazetta’s T&A work from the late 70’s. More shameless tawdryness, mule!

483. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:05 pm [Reply]

     Okay, kids – I’m-a goin’ home before my boss asks me what I did all day. Yes, home to my “creaky dial-up.” But I fully expect to see 500 before Josh finally chimes in from the aether. More content, mules!

484. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:05 pm [Reply]

     Yeah, Liberty Meadows was weird that way. Everyone else cartoonish, then her, boom!

485. Luban
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:09 pm [Reply]

     So the Leader is finally returning? Screw it, I’m sticking with the Underground.

     Rebels are we!
     Born to be free!
     Just like the fish in the sea!

486. another country heard from
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:09 pm [Reply]

     Before you rush off to any rash decisions, check out Aneja (I think that’s her name) in Modesty Blaise (yeah, I know – it’s not endorsed by out evil overlord, but what the hell): http://www.ucomics.com/espanol/modestyblaise/2005/05/06/
     Modesty, by the way, is no slouch herself. Anybody know if she still exists in English anywhere?

487. Sir H C
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:11 pm [Reply]

     Googling Liberty Meadows we find:

     Forbidden Cartoons

     Even newspaper comics have outtakes. Frank Cho shares more than 100 rejections from his popular syndicated series set in an animal sanctuary.

     On each page of exclusions presented at the artist’s site, click the various preview images to reveal another strip in the dead file.

     Some of these items contain adult content, fortunately featuring those scantily clad lovelies, the pretty-in-ink Brandy and Jen. Obviously, cartoonist Cho savors the female human form and I’d be hard pressed to find more alluring cartoon lasses than the ones inhabiting “Liberty Meadows.”

     – Okay, I accept the challenge! I guess I could go research the 2001 model Aunt Fritzi Ritz again. It’s a dangerous mission visiting her in the “Nancy” comics, because always lurking: nudes of Sluggo.

488. Moesy
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:15 pm [Reply]

     Holy giant ta-ta’s Batman. I just found Liberty Meadows’ booby girl. Those are huge!

489. Monkeys Uncle
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:20 pm [Reply]

     I always enjoyed Liberty Meadows and not just for Brandy’s super fun bags. Frank Cho is an accomplished illustrator in the comic book genre and I thought his strip was funny. I think he retired the strip because of disputes about the content. Thats too bad. If you have time, visit his site and sift through the uncensored archives it is well worth your time. Warning, not for Cathy/Ziggy fans or the easily offended.
     libertymeadows.com

490. Bookworm
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:21 pm [Reply]

     Relevant to nothing here except hitting 500, I checked out the Phantom’s website at King Features, where his son Kit is described as “in training to someday take the sacred ‘Oath of the Skull’ and become the 22nd Phantom.” I say if the stippers want to really bring this stip into the 21st century, young Kit should rebel against wearing the purple tights and leave the family business in the care of his sister whilst he pursues a career in assasinating evil and/or pointless comic stips (Death to Gil Thorp). Meanwhile, sis, with mom’s figure and dad’s duds, would really make a hot comic babe.

491. Monkeys Uncle
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:22 pm [Reply]

     It goes without saying that “Super Fun Bags” would be a good name for a rock group.

492. Luban
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:22 pm [Reply]

     My question about Liberty Meadows: Is Frank Cho on some crazy 4-month delay? The creature in today’s strip is complaining about the Redskins losing to the Cowboys, which last happened on… um, let’s see… Dec. 26. I mean, if you’re gonna do your strips way in advance, you should stay away from time-sensitive things like sporting events.

493. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:30 pm [Reply]

     I too (after slacking most of the day at work) have returned home to my creaky dial-up – oh, that’s right, I FINALLY treated myself to broadband 2 weeks ago – with the $ I made moonlighting singing “Won’t you come home Josh baby?”

     More slackers Mule!

494. Nik
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:30 pm [Reply]

     I like ham.

495. Flasshe
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:31 pm [Reply]

     Okay Sue, I checked out that “Between Friends” strip, which I had never heard of. Read about a week’s worth from the archives. I’ve seen worse. But I’m not a woman in her 40s (last I checked). At least it’s not like “Pickles” (my Pet Peeve strip) where you can figure out the punch line from the first panel.

496. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:32 pm [Reply]

     NOTE: The singular dollar sign is correct….. (sigh!)

     I may not have broadband for very l-

497. Jowdygirl
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:39 pm [Reply]

     Come on guyses,,, gotta get posts to the magic 5 alive, all that jive on the south side, brah!

498. Rana
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:40 pm [Reply]

     More posts, mule!

499. Luban
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:40 pm [Reply]

     I sense 500 is no barrier. 1000, ho!

500. NEW GUY
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:40 pm [Reply]

     Wait…where’s 500?

501. Jowdygirl
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:41 pm [Reply]

     More wild cards Mule!

502. Luban
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:42 pm [Reply]

     No 500 for me, dadblastit.

503. Jowdygirl
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:42 pm [Reply]

     Sheesh I hope we don’t cost Josh megabucks on broadband width or whatever

     Jowdy!

504. Zipper the mule
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:43 pm [Reply]

     HOLY CRAPPUS! You people are like an amazing jazz riff gone right.

     Forget spewing beverages onto the monitor, I’ve got to go change my underpants. Perfect EA Poe wanna bees out there.

     As an aside, I can safely report from Charm City that Josh is alive and well but busy as hell. Hopefully he’ll check in soon.

505. Jowdygirl
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:44 pm [Reply]

     Whooo hoo! hope Josh doesn’t send me a bill Brah,, No Benjamins!

     Jowdy and WOOF!

506. Incident
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:50 pm [Reply]

     Okay… Looks like the master has to come in and set everyone straight.

     Hottest girls with substance.

     http://www.wapsisquare.com/

     Hottest skank girls.

     http://www.butternutsquash.net/

     Hottest underage girls.

     http://www.elgoonishshive.com/

     I got bored with Cho because he only draws one type of girl-see Adam Hughes for a guy who knows how to draw different types of women. AND Cho uses that damn pig-getting-punched-in-the-bar joke about as much as Odie gets kicked off the table.

     God, I shouldn’t admit I know any of this.

507. CHA5NCE
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:52 pm [Reply]

     What is with this long, calculated, old lady seduction that Mary Worth is doing? Someone tried to hit on me after a funeral once, and even suggested that going to bed would be an “affirmation of life.” I think Momzilla should lay off the bourbon and run while she can.

508. laska
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:54 pm [Reply]

     The Katzenjammer Kids are still around? What a waste of ink and paper! Just trying to do my bit before Josh gets back…

509. Jowdygirl
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:56 pm [Reply]

     We ’stand, No prob. get down on the SOUTH SIDE (and get a kewl flat-top Brah!)

     yeh, we be BAD to da BONE

510. Jowdygirl
     May 10th, 2005 at 5:58 pm [Reply]

     Hey, gr8 2 c u CHA5NCE — you are the George Washington of this thread Dude

511. Jowdygirl
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:00 pm [Reply]

     you wanna make out on Mike and Deanna’s squeaky bed?

512. another country heard from
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:09 pm [Reply]

     Jowdy! Yer gonna make me go back and read (Death to)Gil Thorpe again.

513. Monkeys Uncle
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:14 pm [Reply]

     Over 500 comments on one post and

     almost 250 comments in less then 24 hrs

     I think those are both records. Congratulations! We have accopmlished nothing, and done it with dignity, and a quiet confidence that demonstrates our refinement.

     Death to Gil Thorpe

     Bark!,Bark!,Bark!

514. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:15 pm [Reply]

     Oy – dial-up. The only thing worse than not having highspeed is having it and then going back to dial-up afterwards! My broadband went with my divorce! But now I am at home with pizza and very cold, extremely hoppy ale, and that tends to put a smile on my face like nothing since Edda in a tango dress! More rinestones, mule!

515. Anne Nonymous
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:15 pm [Reply]

     All right, I think we all need to take deep breaths, here. We await Josh’s heralded return, and if he doesn’t get his ass over here PDQ, we’re taking over, including taking the money for the Comics Curmudgeon gear. The Komix Kardinals are getting very, very restless.

516. Valiant
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:19 pm [Reply]

     Luban, the Liberty Meadows that are currently running are recycled. No telling when that game was.

     But it was a great strip.

517. fluffytufts
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:21 pm [Reply]

     Think Josh’ll tell us where he’s been? Hopefully helping his sex educator/facilitator fiancee with homework. That’s the only good excuse, if you ask me.

518. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:47 pm [Reply]

     Maybe Josh has been taking care of business, instead of slacking off, as we have been, eh?

     WOE TO US!

     (and I hope to all that’s holy that my boss isn’t savvy to this blog and recognizes my writing!)

     And no, I am not a Canuck, just like saying “eh?”

519. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 6:50 pm [Reply]

     More eh?’s Mule!

520. Buzz Dixon
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:17 pm [Reply]

     Comic Strip Hotties:

     Monique at SINFEST
     http://sinfest.net/index.htm

     Yenny at…well…YENNY
     http://www.ucomics.com/yenny/

     Penny & Aggie
     http://www.comicssherpa.com/site/feature?uc_comic=csgme

     BTW, anybody notice the guy drawing the ARCHIE daily strip often puts Betty and Veronica’s boobs on upside down, putting the curve on top and the straight stress line underneath? Wuddup widdat?

521. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:18 pm [Reply]

     Okay, I actually went and WORKED this afternoon, after being so castigated by Joe D., and I come back and what do I find?

     The coup folding like a blind origami student with parkinsons!

     I’m so glad Josh is returning. I much prefer my tyrants with a little chutzpah!

522. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:20 pm [Reply]

     I cut an interview short just to get back here and see what’s going on. Oh, well, ten days to deadline. And what do I find you all doing? Discussing women’s breasts!

     Mary Worth’s are real. And they’re fabulous!

     Onward. But we’d all better start buying stuff, this bandwidithis costing our Joshie babe a fortune. I bought a Zippers tee shirt, which stuns and confounds the other ladies at my gym. I love it!

     Eeeee awwwwww! Save your Josh Head money, the
     Kardinal Kollege shall rise again!

523. Monkeys Uncle
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:31 pm [Reply]

     Eeeee awwwwww!
     Eeeee awwwwww?

     Commment of the week.

     Grrrr!

524. Incident
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:49 pm [Reply]

     One of the free comics I got on Free Comic Book Day was a “Betty and Veronica’ thing.

     I overpaid.

525. Luban
     May 10th, 2005 at 7:58 pm [Reply]

     Thanks, Valiant, re the Liberty Meadows recycling. I was confused because the date on today’s strip is 5-10 (but even Peanuts Classic gives the current date). I should’ve looked more closely at the copyright– it’s from 2000!

526. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:00 pm [Reply]

     Sorry off the topic, but is anyone watching American Idol? Jeez Christ, these kids (so talented) are dedicating songs to their PARENTS, which are so unnerving, (or at the least, inappropriate)

     Dayumm,, I made the right choice, not giving birth to some evil (albeit millionaire) spawn

527. Incident
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:03 pm [Reply]

     No, Byron, because teevo is busy with Veronica Mars. Way more exciting than a faked game show.

528. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:03 pm [Reply]

     The songs were great, but what I mean is, you don’t “dedicate” a song to your Mom or Dad like, well, you’ll see.

529. Incident
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:08 pm [Reply]

     Is this like how Debbie Gibson said that all her songs-primarily about premarital intercourse-were inspired by her father?

530. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:10 pm [Reply]

     I prefer to marry my Millionaires, so there !

     (but yeh I work in a friggin office ev. day same as you do)

531. Abbey
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:12 pm [Reply]

     Ok, Josh, You go away for a couple of days and you come home to a pile of blog. (Could be worse, you could be the Phantom and come home to a pile of BLUBB). You HAVE to pick a comment of the week you know. If you don’t you will be so jowdy, you will not be able to stand up straight for a month.

     BARK! BARK! BARK!

532. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:13 pm [Reply]

     OOOPS I meant I slack in a friggin office ev. day same as you do

     but one day yeh,,, you know, lotto $$ or, maybe be adopted by Doctors??? whooooo hooooo

533. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:19 pm [Reply]

     No we can’t put pressure on Josh to pick comment of the week,, Jowdy!

     We’ll send him roamin’ once again….

     Too many comments this week,,,, Mulligan

534. Wally
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:19 pm [Reply]

     I don’t slack in the office any more.

     Actually, I don’t slack in the office any less.

     The T-1 line is the only thing that gets me to go there everyday. If I were stuck home with my “creaky dialup” I think I would start saving pictures of RMMD’s dish June and thinking up amusing (you be the judge) stuff to riff on.

535. Sourbelly
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:21 pm [Reply]

     In Tuesday’s Gil Thorp (death to him), it looks like Mooney is gigging with Miss Three Ears while working for the Taliban. Meanwhile, Frankenstein chides B-to-the-Rent for his oafish chicanery.

     Die twice, Gil.

536. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:23 pm [Reply]

     It’s a little-known fact that the original T-1 was sent back in time to destroy Sarah Conner.

537. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:26 pm [Reply]

     Oh, and webcomic breasts don’t get much bigger than in Sore Thumbs. Look at them!

     http://www.sorethumbsonline.com/characters.html

     Shame the comic sucks.

538. O'Really
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:30 pm [Reply]

     I went to the office to work(ed)
     but I sat near a smelly old jerk(ED).
     He would look at my screen
     and shout things obscene
     cause he thought I slacked and sherk(ed).

539. Incident
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:34 pm [Reply]

     Today’s Gil Thorp takes some liberties translating from the original Bavarian. I know the meaning of every word in the strip, but the way they’re arranged makes absolutely no sense.

540. Incident
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:39 pm [Reply]

     Corpse,

     Yeah, I dunno what the deal is with Sore Thumbs being so bad. Superosity, by the same writer, is one of my most favourite comics ever. He must use up all his funny on that one, and not have any left by the time he gets to Thumbs. It’s like the difference between Bloom County and Outland, comedywise. Or Sally Forth and Medium Large.

541. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:44 pm [Reply]

     Good one O’Really,,,, was it Meddling Mary looking at your screen? you know how she is (but I hope you got to taste-test her Alpo casserole that her new g/f lent to her)

     BARK! Woof! (look in the LEFT cabinet June! – behind the mixing bowls, eh?)

542. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:45 pm [Reply]

     Yeah, what I read of Superosity was actually pretty decent. My impression is that the writer just tossed in every element he thought was popular without considering if they were unique, funny or particularly interesting. It’s a “gaming anime webcomic… with fan service!” That discribes half the webcomics out there, and mostly the bad ones.

543. RememberByronFrost
     May 10th, 2005 at 8:50 pm [Reply]

     Incident I agree! first chance I had to check out GT,, wtf?

     Are we from another planet or what?

544. Xenon21x2
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:01 pm [Reply]

     Coming to you Earthlings, from what you call the Solar System ‘Andromeda’

     from Time Traveler known as
     Xenon21×2 (commonly referred to as Mim’s spawn’s spawn)

     Yeh, MW is still alive in 2105 !

545. Xenon21x2
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:05 pm [Reply]

     Also…. GT nerds still sporting ‘crew cuts’ and speaking in foreign tongues

     do you really want to live another 100 years? do it right! click here,,,,,,,,
     (damm, broadband cut me off again)

546. Delaney Bebow
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:06 pm [Reply]

     And I am Delaney Bebow, a time traveler from tomorrow’s Gil Thorpe!

547. Delaney Bebow
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:12 pm [Reply]

     Oh look, these boxers aren’t creepy:

     http://www.cafepress.com/gilthorp.3094952

548. TwoClubs
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:14 pm [Reply]

     I think Josh has gone roadside.

     More foobs, mule!

549. Xenon21x2
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:15 pm [Reply]

     is what you call “nice” to meet a fellow TT – easy to get lost here in time/space/ – I think I missed my last turn off, friggin cell phone

550. Xenon21x2
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:18 pm [Reply]

     OMG, as you earthlings might utter, re: those GT boxer shorts

     we thought our oxygen-deprived planet was bad,, but now we are reconsidering

551. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:19 pm [Reply]

     Well, if you time travellers had bothered going to that convention you fellows just had, you’d have had a chance to socialize.

552. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:24 pm [Reply]

     Had a blog in Baltimore, Jack
     Went out to an editing job
     And I never came back

     Like a 3G storyline that
     Doesn’t know where it’s flowing
     The commenters took a wrong turn
     And they just keep on going

     Everybody’s got a comic heart
     Everybody’s got a comic fart

     Everybody’s got some comic art!

     - a tip of the Hatlo Hat to Springsteen

553. Xenon21x2
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:24 pm [Reply]

     perhaps we are more prolific surviving on sand than grass.

554. Michael J.
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:25 pm [Reply]

     I like Gil Thorp. I just wish the kids were in junior high…

555. Xenon21x2
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:26 pm [Reply]

     Earthling Female IG – as you say PROPS to you,,, the Boss Rules ! even in our solar system in 2105

556. Smitty Smedlap
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:28 pm [Reply]

     Nobody draws hotter women than Jack Chick. ‘Course they’re all doomed to burn in the firey furnace — but they looked good during their short, miserable lives.

     Remember, 800 sexologists can’t be wrong! Haw haw haw!

     http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0090/0090_01.asp

     Oh, and death to Roger Thorp.

557. Flasshe
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:30 pm [Reply]

     I’m holding out for the Gil Thorp speedos. Josh should sell them and then I’ll send in my picture.

558. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:32 pm [Reply]

     http://www.cafepress.com/gilthorp.3094952???!!!

     Holy salt stain appariton on a concrete highway pillar somewhere in the Mid-West!

     Does anyone actually wear these?

     Death to Gil Thorp apparel!

559. Rita
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:34 pm [Reply]

     Way to go Islamorada Girl! You summed it up for all!

     how enviable!

     May I pick you up for lunch tomorrow at the mausoleum trailer park?

560. Rita
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:36 pm [Reply]

     I promise fresh shrimp and fresh grief

561. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:44 pm [Reply]

     Whoa! That’s not Jack Chick’s artwork! I have a couple of Chick comics from the 70’s, and that is not his work. It’s a Chick Impostor!

     Right church, wrong pew.

562. Islamorada Girl
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:48 pm [Reply]

     Rita—Is that Alpo casserole or are you just happy to see me?

     Death to Gil Thorp pajamas, also. Waaay to creepy.

563. daChipster
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:50 pm [Reply]

     Islamorada Girl, now you’ve placed yourself in MY neck of the woods. “Our Lady of the Underpass” appeared where Fullerton Ave. runs under the Kennedy Expressway – not just somewhere in the Mid West, but in Chicago, the super-urb to the suburb where I grew up.

     http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/columnists/ericzorn/weblog/archives/2005/04/the_stain_i_can.html

     The link is to blog of Eric Zorn of the Tribune and has a neat picture of the apparition, or, as I like to call her, the Fullerton & Freeway Fatima.

     It’s gotta be real real. Hey, girls in their Communion dresses don’t just worhip any old salty stains, right?

     Unless you’re Monica Lewinksi.

     And the CANDLES? You shoulda SEEN the candles. So many that the brightness was keeping the homeless guys up at night.

     Oh, and BTW, Zorn’s blog was what brought us together. I followed a link from there and tumbled down THIS little rabbit hole….

     Curiouser and curiouser!

564. Jowdygirl
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:52 pm [Reply]

     Helllllllloooo? you guys not going for 600 or what? Just cuz you gotta go to “work” tomorrow? or feed your family and/or pets?

     Get your damm priorities straight! too damm close to 600 to quit now…. ok, the guys had their chance talking about ta-ta’s., now our turn, talking bout packages……. anyone?

565. Jowdygirl
     May 10th, 2005 at 9:58 pm [Reply]

     Hey Chip, I was one who made my first Communion, at age 6! Not to be disrespectful, but don’t remember much about it except all the adults partying
     (but I got some loot)

566. yellojkt
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:04 pm [Reply]

     Top Hot Comic Chicks – Past or Present (web comics don’t count. Any fanboy can draw big breasted bimbos. The trick is to get them printed in the family newspaper.)
     1. Daisy May – L’il Abner
     2. Brandy – Liberty Meadows
     3. Helen – Sweetheart of the Internet
     4. Boopsie – Doonesbury (with Alex coming on strong)
     4. Blondie (points off for the hairdo)
     5. Miss Buxley – Beetle Bailey
     6. Lois – Hi and Lois (Queen of the Milf’s)
     7. Mom (pre-new haircut)- Family Circus (does she have a name?)
     8. Diane Walker – Phantom
     9. LuAnn – Apartment 3G
     10. Cathy – Hey, maybe I’m a chubby chaser.

567. Jowdygirl
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:06 pm [Reply]

     but of course, you spend your grade school days going to Mass ev. day; and Catholic all-girl school, but,,, what can I say? I make the big bux now, thanks to all of that BS; but it’s worth it, seriously

     woof

568. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:07 pm [Reply]

     Packages, you say? Well, I know bashing Rob Liefeld on the internet is like adding more porn, but check this out:

     http://robliefeld.net/images/teentitans/titans4.jpg
     Who is this picture has a bulging package that shouldn’t be packing? That’s right, the flying blonde chick!

     More hermaphrodites, mule!

569. yellojkt
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:08 pm [Reply]

     For comic women in negligees, see the April 15 of Between Friends.

570. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:11 pm [Reply]

     Speaking of hermaphrodites, I can’t help but suspect that thing in the first panel has a variety pack, if you know what I mean.

571. Delaney Bebow
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:11 pm [Reply]

     Everyone in the future wears Gil Thorp underpants.

     Including Mary Worth

572. Jowdygirl
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:16 pm [Reply]

     ***Warning*** Don’t google male cartoons…. dayummm you wouldn’t believe what you get

     deep breath, strong drink,, back later

573. Jowdygirl
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:26 pm [Reply]

     oops? where did everyone go?

574. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:42 pm [Reply]

     I’m here. It’s just that nobody wants to talk about hermaphrodites. I’d have this group would jump on that topic like Gunther would Luann.

575. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:43 pm [Reply]

     I’d have thought this group would jump on that topic like Gunther would Luann. Damn decaying flesh.

576. Incident
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:52 pm [Reply]

     Sorry, but whenever I see Rob Liefeld art, I immediately leave the room.

     The ol’ Robster has recently tried his hand at online comics, fyi, and the result is a level of mediocrity and wretchedness you didn’t know existed.

     http://robliefeld.net/shrink.htm

577. Fireball
     May 10th, 2005 at 10:54 pm [Reply]

     Last I knew, Frank Cho (who I met once and got autographs from, he was really cool) took Liberty Meadows over to Image Comics to be printed in comic book format. I have no idea if Frank is still with Image, because he had some other irons in the fire, but Image gave him more freedom than the syndicate editors that kept axing his work.

     I suppose that begs up the question, who has the bigger guns? Brandy or any character drawn by Rob Liefeld?

578. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:03 pm [Reply]

     Re: Shrink.

     My god. I didn’t think it was possible to hate any of those more than the snowman making the lame ice puns a la Ahnold in Batman and Robin, but then I clicked the fifth one. It had a little man with a bulging crotch the size of a watermelon.

     …

     MY EYES BURN!!!!

579. 36-A (damproudIdon'tSag)
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:19 pm [Reply]

     So get over it !

     Now you know how we feel!

580. Fay'sRestlessSpirit
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:37 pm [Reply]

     Oh where oh where is our Joshy guy?

     We be getting off subject here,, for instance, is Pus Boy in a COMA with NO HEALTH INSURANCE ?

     who in hell is gonna pay for the AIR EVAC COPTER, not to mention hospital bill?

     Ya think June has megabucks stashed away, for just such an occasion?

581. Fay'sRestlessSpirit
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:40 pm [Reply]

     Sorry bout your luck lil Sara,,,, Buck comes first!

582. Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 10th, 2005 at 11:55 pm [Reply]

     …and Rex comes second.

583. Dub Not Dubya
     May 11th, 2005 at 12:18 am [Reply]

     In Wednesday’s 3-G, Luann has caught Margo’s bobblehead condition.

584. Luban
     May 11th, 2005 at 1:10 am [Reply]

     Wednesday’s (Death to) Gil Thorp: Ah, now I get the “Delaney Bebow” business. Great name! Must be an inside joke at the Detroit News, where Neal Rubin writes his column. There’s a reporter there named John Bebow.

     Anyway, I’m betting Miss Bebow is a shark. She’s gonna take those boys for everything they’re worth. Don’t they know the dangers of playing against someone from Pokerpard.com?

585. PizzaBagel
     May 11th, 2005 at 1:27 am [Reply]

     What’s with the aghast look from Boozin’ Begler in panel two of today’s MW, in silent response to Mary’s “Let this be the first of many visits you’ll make here!”? (”You mean I won’t be moving in here with you permanently?!!!”)

586. Islamorada Girl
     May 11th, 2005 at 8:01 am [Reply]

     Well, now I guess I’m going to the headsman, like Lady Jane Grey. Yoicks!

587. Buzz Dixon
     May 11th, 2005 at 9:40 am [Reply]

     Today’s FBOFW — noisy retiree sex — Ewwwwwwwww!

     EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!

588. fluffytufts
     May 11th, 2005 at 10:09 am [Reply]

     Is it over? Is the World’s Longest Thread dead? *sigh*

589. Anonymous
     May 11th, 2005 at 10:23 am [Reply]

     it

590. Anonymous
     May 11th, 2005 at 10:23 am [Reply]

     is

591. Anonymous
     May 11th, 2005 at 10:24 am [Reply]

     over

592. Anonymous
     May 11th, 2005 at 10:24 am [Reply]

     …

593. Anonymous
     May 11th, 2005 at 10:24 am [Reply]

     now.

594. Ali
     May 11th, 2005 at 10:52 am [Reply]

     Not quite. Can anyone explain the Blubb Sputt Egypt thing from the much earlier posts? This egyptophile wants to know.

595. Ali
     May 11th, 2005 at 11:04 am [Reply]

     Also, I wouldn’t be suprised if I was one of the “Not Funny Commentators.” I’m often not as clever here as I’d like to be, but I’d at least like to think I’m cute :}

596. Ali
     May 11th, 2005 at 11:05 am [Reply]

     Josh is back, but lets try for 600 anyway! (only 4 away)

597. Flasshe
     May 11th, 2005 at 11:51 am [Reply]

     Ah, massive comment thread, I knew you well. But you have outlived your usefulness. Begone, I say!

598. Bookworm
     May 11th, 2005 at 11:59 am [Reply]

     Ali, read the “Jungle Fever” post to see the origins of Blubb Sputt.

599. Abbey
     May 11th, 2005 at 12:03 pm [Reply]

     599

     BARK! BARK! BARK!

600. Abbey
     May 11th, 2005 at 12:03 pm [Reply]

     600

     BARK! BARK! BARK!

601. Abbey
     May 11th, 2005 at 12:05 pm [Reply]

     In particular, do not attempt to post the same comment, like, a kajillion times.

     Ok, we got it to 600, should we try for the kajillion?

     More posting the same thing over and over again, mule.

     BARK! BARK! BARK!

602. Comment by Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 11th, 2005 at 1:16 pm [Reply]

     Very well. This thread shall not die.

603. S-to-the-ourbelly
     May 11th, 2005 at 1:25 pm [Reply]

     I’ll bet this is the last comment on this thread.

     Death to Gil Thorp (…..orp…..orp…..orp)

604. Oops
     May 11th, 2005 at 2:52 pm [Reply]

     I’ll take that bet

605. fluffytufts
     May 11th, 2005 at 3:33 pm [Reply]

     Suuuuuure is quiet in here…..

606. Comment by Comment by Comment by Comment by
     May 11th, 2005 at 5:38 pm [Reply]

     So how about them Spider-Mans?

607. daChipster
     May 11th, 2005 at 6:38 pm [Reply]

     This is the thread that never ends
     It just goes on and on my friends
     Some people started posting here not knowing what it was
     And they’ll continue posting here forever just because This is the thread that never ends
     It just goes on and on my friends
     Some people started posting here not knowing what it was
     And they’ll continue posting here forever just because This is the thread that never ends
     It just goes on and on my friends
     Some people started posting here not knowing what it was
     And they’ll continue posting here forever just because This is the thread that never ends
     It just goes on and on my friends
     Some people started posting here not knowing what it was
     And they’ll continue posting here forever just because This is the thread that…

608. The Rhino
     May 11th, 2005 at 6:57 pm [Reply]

     I’m worried about the Rhino actor that I tied up and left for dead ages ago. Innocent people don’t *usually* die in Spider-Man, but at this rate..

609. Sourbelly
     May 11th, 2005 at 7:06 pm [Reply]

     OK, this HAS to be the last post on this thread. No way people are going to keep posting here.

610. J.Po
     May 11th, 2005 at 8:05 pm [Reply]

     NOBODY expeccts this to be the last post!

611. Islamorada Girl
     May 11th, 2005 at 8:14 pm [Reply]

     This is our last post,
     This is our last post,
     Under pressure!

612. Comment by Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 11th, 2005 at 9:09 pm [Reply]

     Fun with Babelfish

     You they people by them and rapidly about this form of this brilliant thing 4 cannot believe anybody it mentioned this.

     Truly one if the name of sametsa of deer charles.

     Charles it is possible to reduce with the the vice

     unkempt can it pseudointellectual the science of the student of man them unkeptpseudointellectuality more to them the maximum of schoolgirl make an impression? And the best means, is which necessary to be vaderlijke for responsibility than with the sleep in the garden after house medicos of murmurs renownedly local, solid in the upper its own hand and did lose Indian trunks for the avoiding?

     With regard to with the wild defeat – I think of the hedge of which after Frank he is innocent individual. When we needed another proof, the indication is now clear: not piss of Margo.

613. Sourbelly
     May 11th, 2005 at 9:38 pm [Reply]

     Piss of Margo.

     Luxuriate in the piss of Margo.

     Oh, how my loins ache for the piss of Margo.

     Piss.

     Of Margo.

     …Now THAT’S a threadkiller.

614. Comment by Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 11th, 2005 at 9:53 pm [Reply]

     Rex Morgan, M.D + Babelfish = Golden Showers

     Sure didn’t see that one coming.

615. The Dark One
     May 12th, 2005 at 12:18 am [Reply]

     Do you, I wonder, have any idea what will happen when we get to comment number 666? BWAH-HA-HA-HAHH!!!

616. 2fs
     May 12th, 2005 at 12:20 am [Reply]

     Hello? Anyone still here? We were talking about breasts. Anyway: the weirdest breasts on the comics page belong to the women of “Rhymes with Orange” – I mean what the hell, they’re like, what, elongated commas or something.

617. Mibbitmaker
     May 12th, 2005 at 12:41 am [Reply]

     This is the World Famous More B-to-the-Rent roadside splutt gig blubb Fence Post Benjamin Brah Frank no-fence-no-cents sly smile BARK BARK foob BARK run to high ground, death to Gil Thorpe zippers, mule… of uhlm!

     Good name for a rock band!

     (for the Inna Gadda Da Vida of comment threads)

618. Sourbelly
     May 12th, 2005 at 12:42 am [Reply]

     Move along folks, nothing to see here. This was just a…

     A what? What was this? A pathetic display of workplace/homeplace ennui? A glimpse into the bleak nothingness of the human soul? What? What?

     Am I the last living cell in a dead thread? I pray it is so.

619. Comment by Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 12th, 2005 at 3:15 am [Reply]

     Must… keep… posting…

     Can’t… let… thread… die…

     Right, breasts. Ah, Breasts: Nature’s natural handfuls. I have to say, Sally Forth looks pretty good in those tee-shirts. Ted’s a lucky man.

     Of course, no one is more pre-tailored to sexual objectification than Blondie. That hourglass waste, that bottle-colored hair helmet, those two curved lines that indicate the presence of her mammaries — Blondie is quite the MILF.

620. c-to-the-Hipster
     May 12th, 2005 at 6:07 am [Reply]

     Yes, sourbelly, that is the last post. Congrats. I… whoops, sorry.

621. Islamorada Girl
     May 12th, 2005 at 7:29 am [Reply]

     Before I go into exile for the aborted coup,
     let’s try to hit 666.

622. Satan's Spawn
     May 12th, 2005 at 8:45 am [Reply]

     666
     666
     666

     Let’s get all the kids from Gil Thorp Chanting…

     666
     666
     666

623. The Angel Gabriel
     May 12th, 2005 at 9:54 am [Reply]

     Actually, the whole “666″ thing has been misinterpreted over time. It was actually supposed to be “999″, so you folks have a ways to go.

     Eternal Life to Gil Thorp!

624. Satan
     May 12th, 2005 at 10:05 am [Reply]

     Evil is dyslexic.

     666
     999
     Whatever.

     Dyslexics of the world UNTIE

625. Islamorada Girl
     May 12th, 2005 at 10:38 am [Reply]

     If the road to hell is paved with good intentions, I’m driving Satan’s ‘58 purple candy-flake Eldorado down Route 666!

626. daChipster
     May 12th, 2005 at 11:26 am [Reply]

     Sing it with me now, I-girl!

     I get my kicks
     on Route Six-six-six

627. Lor
     May 12th, 2005 at 2:08 pm [Reply]

     What, nothing since 11:26 a.m.??

     Okay, let’s discuss “roadside,” shall we?

     Could this be the origin:

     “For when time takes you out for a spin in his car
     You’ll be hard-pressed to stop him from going too far
     And be left by the roadside, for all your good deeds
     Two toadstools for tits and a face full of weeds”

     From the immortal “In a Prominent Bar in SecaucusOne Day” by X.J. Kennedy… could Lynn be remembering this?

628. Lor
     May 12th, 2005 at 2:10 pm [Reply]

     Read the whole thing here:

     http://tinyurl.com/dchxu

     Heh heh, she said “bung”…

     Onward to 666!

629. Sting
     May 12th, 2005 at 2:17 pm [Reply]

     629! Which is almost divisible by 3! That makes it a magic number, almost.

630. Abbey
     May 12th, 2005 at 2:22 pm [Reply]

     This is the last post you will see here!

     BARK! BARK! BARK!

631. J.Po
     May 12th, 2005 at 2:33 pm [Reply]

     Anne Nonymous – made ya look!

632. Islamorada Girl
     May 12th, 2005 at 2:46 pm [Reply]

     What thrift shop does Mary Worth buy her clothes from? Love that polyester!

     34 more. Come on, guys! We can do this!

633. SatchelFan
     May 12th, 2005 at 2:46 pm [Reply]

     For Anne N.

     When the number of comments is found to be high
     And our boy Josh didn’t really die
     Don’t you want somebody to stop?
     Don’t you need somebody to stop?
     Wouldn’t you love somebody to stop?
     You’ll never find anybody who’ll stop!

634. Abbey
     May 12th, 2005 at 3:25 pm [Reply]

     Die Thread Die

635. Abbey
     May 12th, 2005 at 3:26 pm [Reply]

     Please Die Thread.

     And take Gil Thorp with you.

     BARK! BARK! BARK!

636. Yebba
     May 12th, 2005 at 3:32 pm [Reply]

     !KRAB !KRAB !KRAB

637. Lor
     May 12th, 2005 at 3:34 pm [Reply]

     Say, Josh, how about a T-shirt with pics of all the various sweater kittens under discussion, with the words How enviable! And for the gals, a shirt without the pics that just says … well, you know.

638. S-to-the-ourbelly
     May 12th, 2005 at 4:07 pm [Reply]

     There once was a wigger from Milford
     Who miscegenated with….crap, nothing’s going to rhyme with Milford.

     No one’s going to read this anyway.

639. Luban
     May 12th, 2005 at 4:23 pm [Reply]

     You can’t, you won’t, and you don’t stop.
     Curmudgeonettes come and rock the sure shot.

640. Comment by Charles Schulz’s corpse
     May 12th, 2005 at 4:55 pm [Reply]

     Come on, Satan!

641. Lor
     May 12th, 2005 at 8:03 pm [Reply]

     Sourbelly brah:

     Billboard sorta rhymes. Milhoard? (the Milford Food Bank) Milhorde? (the denizens of Milford) Milsword, Milbored, Miltoward, Milcored, Mildoored, Milwhored … whoa….

642. Bob the Builder
     May 12th, 2005 at 8:17 pm [Reply]

     Can we do it?

     YES we can!

643. J.Po
     May 12th, 2005 at 8:31 pm [Reply]

     Will we get to 666 before June finds the package in the cupboard?

     BARK BARK BARK!

644. Lor
     May 12th, 2005 at 8:42 pm [Reply]

     More package, mule!

     There once was a borough named Milford
     With skeletons locked in its cupboard
     But B-to-the-rent
     He came and he went
     Without telling us all what we’re in for(d)

645. Lor
     May 12th, 2005 at 8:44 pm [Reply]

     There once was a borough named Milford
     With skeletons locked in its cupboard
     But B-to-the-rent
     He came and he went
     Without telling us all what we’re in for(d)

646. Slack Master
     May 12th, 2005 at 8:51 pm [Reply]

     Can we get this to 666?

     We will know if we do.

     How bout Josh?

     N’yah. He’ll just toss it in the trash and go wreck some more havoc with the Thumpsteins.

647. Sourbelly
     May 12th, 2005 at 9:32 pm [Reply]

     OK, Lor, here goes:

     Their once was a wigger from Milford
     Who was one of the poorly drawn Milhorde
     He sought miscegenation
     Some chocolate vagination
     But he left her and us simply Milbored

     Oh well.

648. Dub Not Dubya
     May 12th, 2005 at 10:45 pm [Reply]

     There once was a Milford High School
     Whose students thought they were so cool
     Androgynous Pat
     Fit in just like that
     And said, “More hermaphrodites, mule!”

649. Dub Not Dubya
     May 12th, 2005 at 10:48 pm [Reply]

     Rats, I just posted a limerick that apparently got trapped for certain words. I hope Josh stops by soon and frees it because I don’t want to try to trick the filter and spoil the effect. I do think you’ll like it. Josh, hurry, hurry!

650. Jordon
     May 12th, 2005 at 10:57 pm [Reply]

     This thread could go nucular when it reaches 666.

651. Luban
     May 12th, 2005 at 11:35 pm [Reply]

     Brent-Dog, who’s straight outta Milford,
     Told Mandy, “Let’s hang out and chill-ferd.”
     But Mandy said, “Brent!
     Your act is so spent,
     ‘Cos your lingo is totally pilfered!”

652. Luban
     May 12th, 2005 at 11:37 pm [Reply]

     Brent-Dog, who’s straight outta Milford,
     Told Mandy, “Let’s hang out and chill-ferd.”
     But Mandy said, “Brent!
     Your act is so spent,
     ‘Cos your lingo is totally pilfered!”

653. GeoX
     May 13th, 2005 at 12:29 am [Reply]

     ALL YOUR POST ARE BELONG TO US

654. Luban
     May 13th, 2005 at 12:32 am [Reply]

     I too posted a (non-dirty) limerick that got spam-trapped. Maybe Josh’s server-bot is just a poetry snob…

655. Islamorada Girl
     May 13th, 2005 at 6:55 am [Reply]

     Since Josh isn’t reading this anyway, I say
     encore, a bas Gil Thorpe! It’s the thread that wouldn’t die! 14 more to go, honey-pies.

656. Sourbelly
     May 13th, 2005 at 7:50 am [Reply]

     And what will happen when we reach #666? Johnny Hart will add a post just to ruin our fun.

657. Johnny Hart
     May 13th, 2005 at 8:48 am [Reply]

     You are all evil, all of you.

     Especially you clams that have legs.

658. Flasshe
     May 13th, 2005 at 9:35 am [Reply]

     If a comment thread reaches 666 entries and no one is there to read it, does it count?

     Johnny’s here? I thought the Rapture got him.

659. Hmmmm
     May 13th, 2005 at 10:12 am [Reply]

     This count will never reach 657

660. J.Po
     May 13th, 2005 at 11:04 am [Reply]

     Six to go! Come on, let’s hit it soon and then pack it in for the rest of the day…

661. Sourbelly
     May 13th, 2005 at 11:08 am [Reply]

     Johnny is here in spirit–the spirit of his Lord and Savior Jesus Horatio Christ.

662. Sourbelly
     May 13th, 2005 at 11:13 am [Reply]

     666 on Friday the 13th.

     Excellent.

663. lefty von righty
     May 13th, 2005 at 11:23 am [Reply]

     It’s a shame Josh put up new posts. The experience of getting to the number of the beast seems cheapened in a way.

664. Johnny Hart
     May 13th, 2005 at 11:40 am [Reply]

     You will not get to 666. It has been written.

665. Johnny Hart
     May 13th, 2005 at 11:40 am [Reply]

     Trully you are all evil.

666. Evil Abbey
     May 13th, 2005 at 11:41 am [Reply]

     REDRUM! REDRUM! REDRUM!

667. SATAN, FOOLISH MORTAL!!!
     May 13th, 2005 at 6:28 pm [Reply]

     I HAVE RETURNED!!! SOON ALL THE WORLD SHALL KNEEL BEFORE ME!!!

     HMMM… SHOULD I WRITE A HIAKU OR SOMETHING HERE? I’M NOT REALLY SURE WHAT TO DO. SATAN DEMANDS REQUESTS!!!

668. Islamorada Girl
     May 13th, 2005 at 7:14 pm [Reply]

     Uh, how about “Melancholy Baby”?

669. Lor
     May 13th, 2005 at 7:51 pm [Reply]

     Wow! I bow to the makers of limericks, Sourbelly, Dub, and Luban. TOP THOSE, SATAN!

     Methinks Hell is the home of limericks, whereas haiku come from Limbo. Puns? Purgatory.

670. gershwin
     May 13th, 2005 at 8:05 pm [Reply]

     My contribution toward 1000. More enviable, mule!

671. Sourbelly
     May 13th, 2005 at 8:17 pm [Reply]

     Satan, you foob! We were paying you homage by stopping at 666!

     Requests? Maybe you could try a song parody, something like this:

     Brimstones,
     Meet the Brimstones,
     They’re a rotting Hades family.
     From the
     Land of Satan
     They’re emersed in endless misery.
     Someday,
     maybe Fred will find his soul.
     Till then,
     he will rot inside this hole.
     When you’re
     with the Brimstones
     Have an agonizing Hell time
     A sulphur smell time
     You’ll have a Gawddamned time!

672. Peaches
     May 13th, 2005 at 8:25 pm [Reply]

     Hey Satan, how’s about you know, that Billy Joel thingee, oh, wait I know the title, it’s coming to me….Oh yeah! Satan, can you play “Piano Man?”

     Thanths, honey. Say, you’re pretty cute. I like men wif horns. . . bartender, can you set me ‘n
     my scaly red frien’ up here wid aunadda roun’?

673. Evil Abbey
     May 13th, 2005 at 9:02 pm [Reply]

     I didn’t mean to beat up Buck/Chuck/Pus
     Boy. I just kept hearing widdle Sara sayin

     “DO IT! DO I! DO IT!”

     REDRUM! REDRUM! REDRUM!

674. Lor
     May 13th, 2005 at 10:32 pm [Reply]

     Sourbelly, you are way too good at this.

     And Satan still hasn’t given us his contribution. WHASSAMATTA Satan … scared Sourbelly is cooler than you?

675. Mibbitmaker
     May 13th, 2005 at 10:34 pm [Reply]

     Aaaaaaaaaaaaalbatross!

676. SATAN, ON HIS LIVE TOUR
     May 14th, 2005 at 12:59 am [Reply]

     (clears throat, cracks knuckles, sits down at a candy-apple-red Steinway)

     IT’S NINE O’CLOCK ON A SATURDAY,
     THE REGULAR CROWD SHUFFLES ON,
     THERE’S A YOUNG MAN SITTING NEXT TO ME
     DRIPPING PUS FROM A SORE ON HIS PALM

     HE SAYS “BEELZEBUB, PLAY ME A MEMORY
     I’M NOT SO SURE HOW IT WENT DOWN
     I COULDN’T BE DEADER, BUT ANYTHING’S BETTER
     THAN WEARING THAT HOSPITAL GOWN”

     OH LA LA LA, DE DE LAAAA
     LA LAAAA DE DE LA LA LAAAA

     SING US A SONG, YOU’RE THE BRIMSTONE MAN
     SING US A SONG TONIGHT
     WELL WE’RE NOT IN THE MOOD FOR A MELODY
     BUT IT’S BETTER THAN LOSING A FIGHT

677. daChipster
     May 14th, 2005 at 1:29 am [Reply]

     How ’bout

     The Devil went down to Africa
     He was looking for a soul to steal
     He was in a bind he was way behind
     And looking to make a deal

     Then he came upon a Phantom
     Playing a fiddle and playing it hot
     And he jumped up on a mahogany stump
     And said boy let me tell you what

     Now you might not know this,
     but I’m a fiddle player too
     And if you care to take a dare
     I’ll make a bet with you

     Son, you’re pretty good
     but give the Devil his due
     I’ll bet a fiddle of gold against your soul
     That say’s I’m better’n you

     The boy said my name’s Walker*
     And it may be a sin
     But I’ll take that bet you’re gonna regret
     ‘Cause I’m the best that’s ever been

     (* for the Ghost who walks)

678. Islamorada Girl
     May 14th, 2005 at 5:36 am [Reply]

     Applause! Applause!

     BTW, Satan will opening for the Stones, who are even older than him. Call Ticketmaster now! Festival seating! His twenty minute drum solo on “In A Gadda Da Vida” is totally kewl!

679. Sourbelly
     May 14th, 2005 at 10:58 am [Reply]

     Brah-vo, Chip.

     Satan, as always, you rock. (And I love what you’re doing with the Cubs.)

680. SATAN
     May 14th, 2005 at 1:33 pm [Reply]

     If you like what I’m doing with Cubs, wait until you see what I can do with the Nats!
     Bwa-ha-ha-ha!

681. Babe Ruth's Ghost
     May 16th, 2005 at 1:15 pm [Reply]

     Beware of what you ask for, Cubs’ fans. The Dead Sox got their championship, but you will never know how many people sold their immortal soul to get that to happen.

     oooooooooooooeeeeeeeeeeeeeeoooooooooo

682. Ali
     May 27th, 2005 at 10:01 am [Reply]

     Ah, and we were so close to 700

683. Sourbelly
     June 3rd, 2005 at 7:44 pm [Reply]

     Whaddaya mean WERE? We hit 666, now let’s shoot for the 700 Club!

     Really, abandoning this majestic thread would be like cutting down a 683-year-old Sequoia. Er, like, abandoning a 683-year-old…never mind. The point is, you could cut a tunnel through this thread and drive cars through it. Now maybe, in this workaday world, that doesn’t make much sense to you. Well sir, it makes sense to me. One Hell of a lot of sense.

684. Jordan
     December 9th, 2006 at 2:24 am [Reply]

     Aww…it died. Like a year ago. So close to 700…

685. Chupper
     April 4th, 2007 at 3:50 pm [Reply]

     685th Post! I rock!

686. Evaine
     May 16th, 2008 at 10:15 am [Reply]

     Good post. You make some great points that most people do not fully understand.

     “As for the savage beating — I think Fence Post Frank is an innocent man. As if we needed any more proof, the evidence is now clear: don’t piss off Margo.”

     I like how you explained that. Very helpful. Thanks.

687. Anonymous
     July 21st, 2008 at 12:04 pm [Reply]

     wwe

All the cool kids…

…buy Comics Curmudgeon merchandise!

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