The Comics Curmudgeon

143 responses to “Mostly soap opera Thursday-Friday superpost”

1. Justafoob
   June 23rd, 2006 at 10:30 am [Reply]

   Well, isn’t today’s FBOFW a nice kettle of fish. You can hear Granthony’s stache going “BOING! BOING! BOING!” even down here in the States. Man o man does Lynn know how to wrap up an arc.

2. yellojkt
   June 23rd, 2006 at 10:35 am [Reply]

   FW: Because no teenage boy has ever agreed to a hot tub party with a hot blond. I guess he’s afraid of having to explain his genital warts.

   Foobs: “Liz, this is Chipper, my fuck-buddy from the rez. She gives a way better hummer than you do. You oughta take lessons. Let’s take a break from the packing for a three-way. For old time’s sake.”

3. BigJoe
   June 23rd, 2006 at 10:38 am [Reply]

   I’m pretty much repeating a post I made on the previous thread, but since today’s MW strip is featured above I’ll post a similar comment here.

   My impression was that Dr. Cory was wearing a cocktail weenie shirt. He must shop at the same grocery store that Mama Raptor bought her Dorito dress.

4. Dji
   June 23rd, 2006 at 10:38 am [Reply]

   What’s Elizabeth been brewing in her rural kitchen?

5. kaufman
   June 23rd, 2006 at 10:40 am [Reply]

   Looks like Dr. Jeff has 6 fingers in the first panel!

6. Marc
   June 23rd, 2006 at 10:45 am [Reply]

   Josh – I think Jeff is driving his boat…there have been many plotlines involving it…but I could definately see him being a WASPy Well to do golf cart owner.

   BigJoe – Paragraph 2 could be COTW!

7. Jives
   June 23rd, 2006 at 10:55 am [Reply]

   ummm… guess I’ll repeat my MT comment as well.
   Quotin’ Margot teases the nature soap..

8. BigJoe
   June 23rd, 2006 at 10:59 am [Reply]

   SM: First of all, does everyone that takes a screen test get a copy of it as a parting gift? And on old-style 8mm film? Why is she surprised that she’s on the film, isn’t she the one playing it just to admire herself in the first place?

   And I don’t think they dress up in full costume and makeup just to audition. Well, I’m guessing that at least. I’m assuming the costume department isn’t going to tailor a superhero costume for every single person auditioning for the role.

9. Tom
   June 23rd, 2006 at 11:09 am [Reply]

   The half-naked vixen fantasizing about finding her way to “Hightower” Junction to meet a forest ranger was probably subtle enough to get past the censors.

   But how did Elrod get away with that name for the ranger?

10. BigJoe
    June 23rd, 2006 at 11:18 am [Reply]

    #9 – Rick Rogers? I don’t get it.

11. Len
    June 23rd, 2006 at 11:34 am [Reply]

    It’s not what you think, Hermia. Lysander is in my poetry group. We’re studying Shakespeare!

    http://www.comics.com/comics/pibgorn/archive/pibgorn-20060623.html

12. adb
    June 23rd, 2006 at 11:35 am [Reply]

    In other news, today’s “Arlo ‘n’ Janis” has the scariest expression I’ve ever seen in “Arlo ‘n’ Janis.”

13. Pelagius
    June 23rd, 2006 at 11:47 am [Reply]

    #10 – Where did you go to middle school? Not in the US, I assume.

    ‘Ranger Rick had a 6 foot….” etc.

14. Jack Drake
    June 23rd, 2006 at 11:51 am [Reply]

    #10 Ranger Rick? Like the kid’s magazine, maybe?

15. Tom
    June 23rd, 2006 at 11:52 am [Reply]

    If Kelly nicknames him “Tiger,” that should be enough evidence to take to the FCC.

    More information on schoolyard slang can be found on the Internet.

16. Dingo
    June 23rd, 2006 at 11:53 am [Reply]

    Big Joe: Thanks for the laugh with the “Dorito” dress (#3). My grandmother’s birthday is coming up and that’d look good on her. Her skin tone is similar to guacamole.

    adb: Oh, my. You actually got me to look at an Arlo ‘n’ Janis strip (akin to getting me to masturbate while staring at Condileeza Rice – not bloody likely). What the hell kind of a marriage is that? Cymbals? Starter pistols? Pouncing on her? Hasn’t that man ever heard of a dutch oven?

17. Non-Shannon
    June 23rd, 2006 at 11:56 am [Reply]

    Gasp!!!
    That slutty girl in Funky Winkerbean is doing Sally Forth’s patented sly-eye in the last panel! The dorky kid will surely find himself unable to resist such a mesmerizing stare.
    …I wonder if this is how Sally wooed Ted?

18. Dark Star
    June 23rd, 2006 at 11:57 am [Reply]

    #9 I didn’t get the reference either.

    I did a google on “Ranger Rick.” Who knew?
    The only WWF I was exposed to groing up was Worldwide Wrestling Federation.

19. treedweller
    June 23rd, 2006 at 11:59 am [Reply]

    MW: Jeff apparently went to the A3G art show and bought a painting. And it haunts him, so he has to move out.

20. davidicus
    June 23rd, 2006 at 11:59 am [Reply]

    Is there some civic ordinance in Canada that requires everyone to tuck in their shirts? Are we just sloppy down here? And “Chipper” and “Suds”?!? I could understand those tags being used in a Mary Worth, golden-age romance, but this is too much. I’ve never felt farther from our neighbors to the north.

21. dlauthor
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:02 pm [Reply]

    GF: Funny. But if this gets to the point where Bucky offers to show Robbo his Netherlands, I’m leaving.

    Spidey: Apparently, Narna’s audition for Marvella involved her killing a bunch of assistant producers, then popping her right hip out of its socket. I just love how they don’t notice the big red gumdrop clinging to the outside of the nearest window.

    Zits: Walt, you rock.\

    Pluggers: Yeah, this one’s definitely begging for a Photoshop job.

    Mallard: I thought it was the dastardly liberals who took offence at everything, Tinsley. You conservatives have become a bunch of creampuffs lately. Also, bad timing, considering the global warming news that’s been on the front pages the past couple days. I know, I know, it’s all a plot by those left-wing scientists to take away your Hummer 2.

    Foob: For those who are wondering, her name’s Chipper because of how she disposes of the bodies. He cleans up after, hence Suds. Just wait till Lizard finds out! The animation for that particular strip should be extra fun.

    F Minus: Gets better all the time. Love the minimalist expressions on the kids in the bus. The hall steps seem to be bending the laws of space and time in an uncomfortable way, though.

    Arlo & Janis. Arlo really is me. It’s a little scary. Except I’d have killed the cat already.

    Prickly: Setting new standards in drawing unidentifiable objects today. “Oh, the humanity” is a nice touch, but damn, Stantis, learn to draw. There’d be no way to understand what’s going on in today’s strip without seeing the past few days’ worth of puttering blimp-shaped scribbles.

22. BigJoe
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:03 pm [Reply]

    Phantom: So Phantom’s dog doesn’t always obey his orders? That ain’t right. Or are they one of those good cop/bad cop teams, where Devil is always going “off the book” like Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon?

    http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20060623&name=Phantom

    And does this Chatu guy have the wimpiest bunch of evil gunmen ever? First one of them is whining about the desserts, then this one today lets out a big girlie “aiiee” scream when he sees a dog lunging at him.

23. BigJoe
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:10 pm [Reply]

    #13 – Went to Junior High in Michigan – never heard that rhyme.

    More information on Ranger Rick’s 6-footer can not be found on the internet.

24. Smokey Stover
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:17 pm [Reply]

    “Roger” is a common term for tickling the furry beast:

    http://www.bartleby.com/61/51/R0285100.html

25. Pozzo
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:20 pm [Reply]

    According to Lynn Johnston: “You’re not seeing things! We began animating the daily strips on the 19th of June, 2006, and will continue to animate selected strips when the artwork accommodates it. We’re pleased this feature has added some extra interest to the strip – thanks for all your feedback!”

    June 19th (or “the 19th of June,” as they say north of the border) was the day Elizabeth made her shallow promise to Jesse that she’d be back. I guess the wrenching emotion of dealing with so blatant a lie caused his inked-in eyes to start blinking, a disturbing tradition that continues to this day (admittedly, only four days later).

26. Ginger
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:27 pm [Reply]

    I have to say, I never heard the Ranger Rick rhyme either (middle school [as they called it back then] in Connecticut). There is one single solitary Google reference.

27. Adfella
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:28 pm [Reply]

    3 COMMENTS ON MARK TRAIL

    1) Was it necessary to the plot advancement for Elrod to have included that “Later” indication between panels two and three? Would the storyline have disintegrated were we to think Mark was meeting Ranger Rick AT THE SAME TIME Kelly was lounging sexily in her beguiling pink negligee?

    2) Mark seems to be giving Ranger Rick one of those fingers-only, less-than-manly handshakes, rather than engulfing Rick’s entire hand in his meaty palm.

    3) I am really kind of liking Kelly in today’s strip, if you know what I mean. With apologies to Roger Rabbitt: oh, for one night in Toon Town.

28. Maura
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:28 pm [Reply]

    Oh dear GHOD. I used to like Foob. I think this not at all telegraphed setup to get Paul out of the way so Lizardbreath can go running back to Anthony (the world’s least appealing dude) scot-free is probably going to be the very last of what has been a very long string of last straws.

29. Patrick
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:33 pm [Reply]

    Is there a freakin’ law against wearing shoes in the house in Canada?

30. luluchappel
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:34 pm [Reply]

    OBH–I LOVE Earl’s clasped hands and loving gaze as he beams at the vaccuum cleaner in the first panel.

31. MaryAnnTheRest
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:38 pm [Reply]

    FOOB: It’s not what you think, Liz. Susan is in my poetry group.

32. Lisa
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:39 pm [Reply]

    True story:
    While visiting my brother last week in Ohio (not our native state, we’re from much farther south), I was non-plussed to witness him pick up my sister-in-law, whirl her around and grab her ass. Now, I know my brother is not a comics-reader and thus could not possibly be influenced by Dudley Do-Chipper, so is it just simply that the farther north you go, the more of an ass-grabber you become?

    Discuss.

33. GoBobbyGo
    June 23rd, 2006 at 12:52 pm [Reply]

    MW: Is it just me or is Dr. Jeff using a hairnet to pack?

    Lio: Is this genius of a comic REALLY drawn by the same guy who does the piece-o-crap Heart of the City?

    Dilbert: What exactly is on the janitor-guy’s head?

    Quigmans: total ripoff of a stock Life in Hell bit.

34. Frank Drackman
    June 23rd, 2006 at 1:12 pm [Reply]

    I think Dr. Corys behind on his payments to his loan shark.

35. Damian P.
    June 23rd, 2006 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

    SM: Narna LaMarr reminds me of Sean Young, back in the early 1990s when Young when completely insane and started publicly auditioning for the role of Catwoman in Batman Returns. (Am I the only one who remembers that? Am I the only one who remembers Sean Young?)

36. fuzzmaster
    June 23rd, 2006 at 1:19 pm [Reply]

    FBofW: So, after a brief flirtation with race-blind romance, Lynn J shows us that that funny-colored folks should stick to their own kind. Next, does helicopter boy fly off with Anthony’s ex to prove that minor characters introduced solely as one-dimensional plot devices should stay out of the way of morose main characters with commitment problems? Or does one of his rotors slice off the bad mommy’s head? Go out with a bang, Lynn!

37. Chrish
    June 23rd, 2006 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

    Re Trail: Isn’t Kelly’s “Liz Taylor” figure uh, somewhat more like Liz in “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf” than Liz in “Butterfield Eight?”
    ( … strange upper arms. too)

38. johnw
    June 23rd, 2006 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

    Apparently Spider-Man also has the super-sensitive auditory powers of a spider, since he can clearly hear conversations — with a sound track running behind — THROUGH A CLOSED WINDOW.

    And on the general subject of dramatic strips, which are an endangered species on the comics page: Is it possible that their decline has been caused by all the crappy art? There are so many well-trained and underemployed artists around — why do the jobs go to hacks who can’t draw a human hand or maintain continuity within a 4-frame strip?? If the art were (a) competent and (b) somewhat creative, wouldn’t the strips be more likely to survive? (Oh, I forgot: if they hired a competent artist, it’d show up the incompetent WRITERS.)

39. mere cog in the machine
    June 23rd, 2006 at 1:34 pm [Reply]

    #4: You made Elizabeth a skanky meth head! That’s great! Now maybe we really WILL have a threesome!

40. Brent
    June 23rd, 2006 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

    Canadians just don’t wear shoes in the house. Between snow, road salt, gravel, mud, dirt and an assortment of things so disgusting that you really don’t want to know about them, it’s common courtesy to take the shoes off and walk around in stocking feet – saves on cleaning carpets and redoing hardwood floors. Oh, and by the way Mountie Suds probably isn’t a Mountie but a member of the OPP (Ontario Provincial Police). Which if he weren’t native would probably make him as popular on the rez as a dose of the clap.

41. Canaduck
    June 23rd, 2006 at 1:48 pm [Reply]

    #13 I went to middle school in the US (NJ) and I have never heard that either.

42. PaddyJ
    June 23rd, 2006 at 2:02 pm [Reply]

    #29… actually, funny you should notice that. I live in Canada myself, and nobody wears shoes indoors. It makes perfect sense though; people don’t want to track mud and snow in with them.

    anyway, comics:

    MW: I bet the golf cart that Jeff is driving in Mary’s lust-fueled inset has a lot of memories.

43. PaddyJ
    June 23rd, 2006 at 2:07 pm [Reply]

    40:
    right, it seems odd that a cop would be popular on a native reserve.

44. rich
    June 23rd, 2006 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

    16 – “Dutch Oven” was hilarious…thanks! (Though you might’ve added not safe for work!!!)

    36 – I was envisioning a tragedy involving the rotor blades, too. I was hoping for Anthony (after which Liz would ride off with Warren), but you’re right, it would more likely be Therese. Either way — awesome animation!

    And now some questions:

    1) Is it believable that snoopy Abby would leave her kid and the Internet paramour alone in the barn like that? Or is she watching them through that telescope again?

    2) Is Lynn about to pull the oldest trick in the book — Suds and Chipper are siblings, cousins, some such?

    3) Is that stupid-looking “M” headgear on Marvella the least sexy thing ever?

    4) Does FW’s Jessica look like a refugee from the 80s with that big hair?

45. Ubiq
    June 23rd, 2006 at 2:16 pm [Reply]

    Is it me or does anybody else get a C. Montgomery Burns vibe out of that Earl kid?

    “This suctionized cleaning device will fit into my plans quite nicely. Exxxcellent.”

46. Edda
    June 23rd, 2006 at 2:19 pm [Reply]

    So, when I was a little kid I actually liked “Family Circus.” I’m not sure when exactly I began to find it not only cloying, but horrifying (I think it might have been around the time I started understanding “Doonesbury”). Anyway, I am beginning to experience the same seismic shift with “FBOFW.”

    Run, Paul, run. We have seen plenty of indications that Liz’s “issues” are not going away anytime soon.

47. Morgan
    June 23rd, 2006 at 2:21 pm [Reply]

    I’m betting Chipper and Suds are brother and sister or cousins or something and this is considered a platonic hug. Time will tell!

48. mon-ma-tron
    June 23rd, 2006 at 2:24 pm [Reply]

    #21: re: Pluggers.
    Hmmmm, should I use my Photoshop skills for good?
    or eeeeevil….?
    Yeah, I went with evil.

49. adb
    June 23rd, 2006 at 2:25 pm [Reply]

    dlauthor –

    “Except I’d have killed the cat already.”

    YOU’D KILL LUDWIG!?!?!

    Without Ludwig, Arlo ‘n’ Janis is WITHOUT MEANING.

50. Dji
    June 23rd, 2006 at 2:43 pm [Reply]

    #48. That’s glorious.

51. Dennis Jimenez
    June 23rd, 2006 at 2:45 pm [Reply]

    Re: Post 48 – Mon-ma-tron – An absolute stroke of genius!

52. DrBear
    June 23rd, 2006 at 2:50 pm [Reply]

    Platonic, her a*s. If I grabbed my sister like that, I would:
    a-get looked at very strangely.
    b-be slugged by her husband
    c.-probably injure her because she’s 63.

    Nope, we’re talking at least FWB and probably makers of such homemade porno hits as “Party At Chipper and Suds’s.”

53. Miserly
    June 23rd, 2006 at 3:05 pm [Reply]

    I can’t seem to get the bobbling FOOB strips, regardless of the browser I use. Any suggestions? I’m dying for some animated ass-grabbing, Mitigwakawasaki style…

54. Ponzicar
    June 23rd, 2006 at 3:22 pm [Reply]

    I vaguely remember the schoolyard rhyme about the well endowed ranger who was injured in a personal place by a woman who mistook his anatomy for a reptile. My guess is that she took the dismembered part and sold it at an Asian market for a big wad of cash.

55. MossMoses
    June 23rd, 2006 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

    I hope “Suds” doesn’t refer to santorum…

56. dlauthor
    June 23rd, 2006 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

    49: Allow me to explain: I am allergic to cats. When I go to my mother-in-law’s for Christmas Eve, I generally have to spend a large portion of the evening out on the porch with a book, with my wife running hors d’oeuvres and hot beverages to me. The alternative is my lungs swelling shut and my eyes turning into pure blood and dribbling down my face.

    I like Ludwig a lot, and enjoy the Arlo-screws-with-the-cat’s-head strips quite a bit. But the sad truth is, if I were magically swapped with Arlo (which, I’m sure, will be mimicked as a premise for a crappy Adam Sandler film any year now), Ludwig would have to die.

    48: Gah. And you just know the Pluggerdog’s hitting “Frame Advance” repeatedly on that remote control.

    I have said too much.

57. Dji
    June 23rd, 2006 at 3:30 pm [Reply]

    The bobbling FOOBs are on a long delay (a few seconds before the first blink) and they only show up on the FOOB site. I tried copying a strip from the site directly and didn’t retain the animation (I think) but tried copying it from its source directory and got it. (Hence the juiced Liz above.)

    You should be able to see the blinkies here. Be patient. If you don’t see it, stare at it until your retinas detach.

58. Dji
    June 23rd, 2006 at 3:31 pm [Reply]

    I tried posting an explanation of the blinks and their complications, but it got flagged as spam. Try going here. Be patient. If you don’t see it, stare at it until your retinas detach.

59. Bill Peschel
    June 23rd, 2006 at 3:42 pm [Reply]

    Mon, it’s a shame Josh doesn’t have a visual COTW, ’cause that’d get my vote!

60. dlauthor
    June 23rd, 2006 at 3:46 pm [Reply]

    Subtract one from each of my refs a couple posts above. When did I forget how to count?

61. jeffliveshere
    June 23rd, 2006 at 4:05 pm [Reply]

    The sad thing about that FBOFW strip is that the first thing I thought of after I read it was: I wonder what the Comics Curmudgeon will say about it…

62. MossMoses
    June 23rd, 2006 at 4:08 pm [Reply]

    Doc Jeff is packing up. Could this mean he’s finally sick of his platonic relationship with Mary Worth and is moving on? He’s never come close to bumping and grinding with the old hag and when he tries to get in her rancid panties by proposing marriage, she shoots him down. Perhaps he and Lou can cruise for plumper selkies down at the wharf…

63. Smokey Stover
    June 23rd, 2006 at 4:17 pm [Reply]

    Every episode of Apartment 3G is suddenly funny if you add the word “Suddenly” to the last panel.

64. J.P. Patches
    June 23rd, 2006 at 4:32 pm [Reply]

    The posts today seem to have become misnumbered somehow.

65. BassoGap
    June 23rd, 2006 at 4:37 pm [Reply]

    JP Patches? Holy crap…did you bring Boris S. Wart with you? He’s the 2nd meanest man in the world, you know…

66. moose
    June 23rd, 2006 at 4:41 pm [Reply]

    Vacuum cleaner fetish? YIKES!
    Watch out kid that can be dangerous

67. Irina
    June 23rd, 2006 at 4:59 pm [Reply]

    I find it interesting that the FBOFW site is advertising animated strips … when the entire extent of the “animation” is random eye blinking. (okay the cat moved its paw once. But that was the only exception).

    Kudos, Lisa (#30) on using nonplussed correctly! Ya don’t see that too often. Either that, or you’re remarkably stoic.

    Irina, grammar nazi

68. Bitter Scribe
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:00 pm [Reply]

    #48–Absolutely. Ludwig is the only realistic cat I’ve ever seen in the comics. (Of course, the fact that he doesn’t talk puts him waaaaay ahead in the realism department.)

    Also, I fear One Big Happy is about to go off the rails. Vacuum cleaner fetish?!

69. Irina
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:00 pm [Reply]

    er. #31

70. BassoGap
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:01 pm [Reply]

    Grammar nazi. That has the proper tone of…well…er…um…discipline. I like it.

71. Lisa
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:04 pm [Reply]

    Irina, I am most certainly stoic. After all, I read FBOFW every day!

72. Len
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:18 pm [Reply]

    It looks like Hollywood Squares’ special “Disney Rejects” edition!

    http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComic.mpl?date=2006/6/23&name=Quigmans

    I once tried desperately to sell a comic routine about the Seven Dwarfs being genetically recombined to form bizzarre offspring, synthesizing two dwarfs into one.

    There was Hopi, the Native American dwarf; Humpy, the sexually attractive dwarf; Snappy, the well-dressed dwarf; Grok, the science fiction dwarf…

    Try it, it’s fun!

73. monkeyhawk
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:19 pm [Reply]

    Speaking of Santorum (and yes, I can google), perhaps there could be a lifetime achievement award to Pennsylvania’s junior senator in the “Finger Quoting Margo” sweepstakes.

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/

74. Len
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:26 pm [Reply]

    Bud Grace, the creator of Piranha Club, draws himself as a naturist expert in his strip. Pleased to meet you, Ranger Rick! Is it REALLY six-feet long? Boy, howdy!

    http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20060622&name=Piranha

75. Anonymous
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:31 pm [Reply]

    “True, I am smart” Nice modesty, dumbass. But home-style Ragu isn’t the idiot that’s gone and loosened my last screw today.

    That honor goes to that notoriously pinko bunch of tweed-wearing liberals, the National Academy of Sciences. To up and say that the Earth is warmer than its been for 2000 years, and human activity is largely to blame! Frankly, I’m glad that I regularly read “Mallard Fillmore”, so I can parse their lousy caveman clap-trap. I don’t need no stinkin’ scientists! Trying to mislead the public with their rabble-rousing hoo-haw! I think that I can speak for Mallard as well when I say that in the absence of science, I am using severe retardation.

76. cheech wizard
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:33 pm [Reply]

    Isn’t Jessica in FW the daughter of the late John Darling, the egotistical TV host that Batiuk spun off into his own strip? When the syndicate cancelled the strip, Batiuk concluded things with his murder at the hands of a disgruntled viewer. Clearly, Jessica is trying to fill the void in her life and anatomy by copulating wildly with every geekish virgin she can tarnish with her own stain, thereby dragging them down to her level. The implied moral is that girls who grow up without fathers turn into rudderless, hedonistic sluts. Or is that what happens to the offspring of entertainers? I can never keep those straight.

77. Karl
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:33 pm [Reply]

    BigJoe — Attack dogs are often trained with codewords as their commands. In Devil’s case, “hold!” obviously means “rip that m’er-f’er’s throat out!” But The Phantom is a family strip, so The Costumed Vigilante Who Walks can’t say that in so many words.

78. Anonymous
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:33 pm [Reply]

    ok, so I’m “Anonymous” now, am I? Well, don’t that bubble my bacon.
    Singed, Fred P.

79. edgewood
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:39 pm [Reply]

    Moose, in Swimming to Cambodia, Spalding Gray mentions something along those lines.

    FBoFW, you know I clicked on the random strip choice at that site, and was reminded of why I liked this strip. The convoluted plot linesnowadays are seriously turning me off of it though. It is a bit too sappy too consistantly. Sappy sweet is something that is good in small doses, not for being beat over the head with. I also liked the artwork better back then. The stuff nowadays is more realistic looking, but if I wanted realistic images I’d watch tv.

    FW: I’d guess Jessica is setting him up for a humilitation. He strips down and out pops a camera and a bunch of people. The long view of the story arc has her feeling bad about it.

    Jury is still out about the new JP artwork.

    RMMD: disapointment, being blackmailed over this? Pshaw, have them arrested. You already did your time, the short term fallout is not as bad as the long term fallout if you DON’T get it over with. I thought he’d killed someone. Story arc, he saves April, Rex and June stick up for the reformed convict.

    Oh, and I managed to STOP reading LuAnn, the strip just annoyed me so much so often, no resolution, blah blah blah. replaced it with Cow and Boy and am enjoying that.

80. Maughta
    June 23rd, 2006 at 5:47 pm [Reply]

    Yay, Judge Parker goes Bollywood!! Niiiiiiice.

    MW: Y’all are missing the point here. Jeff is packing up for tonight with MARY! He’s finally spending the night. No wonder he looks so down.

81. I'm Not a Mouse
    June 23rd, 2006 at 7:49 pm [Reply]

    Can someone tell me where the hell the actress’ hand is coming from in the first panel of Spider-Man? Am I crazy, or is she just flexible enough to bend her arm and point at something from behind her shoulder?

82. MossMoses
    June 23rd, 2006 at 9:12 pm [Reply]

    76: Packing for Mary Worth? He’s been doing that for years and she rejects his package every time. He and Lou should really hook up and find some Santa Royale plumper floozies with loose morals. The best they can hope for from their current frigid partners is petting, cooing and reacharounds.

83. Goober
    June 23rd, 2006 at 9:29 pm [Reply]

    78: Don’t forget the nonstop nagging and the fucking platitudes. Jeff is trying to get out of town before the old hag gets wind of it.

    9CL: Don’t know what it has to do with the ongoing plot, but who cares?

    DT: Shouldn’t Al Kinda be killing B.O. and wife soon? please?

    RM,MD: Chesty’s giving a literal interpretation of “cry me a river” in the first panel.

84. Marc
    June 23rd, 2006 at 11:20 pm [Reply]

    FW: You dork! She’s stringing you along!

    MW: Yes..so inflexible..thats why they’re actually performing something you don’t see in Mary Worth to often…bending at the joints.

    I also feel bad for that poor woman with the festive balloon protruding from her head.

85. fathima
    June 24th, 2006 at 12:12 am [Reply]

    I just have to say – Raju is the whitest looking brown kid I have ever seen.

86. Dub Not Dubya
    June 24th, 2006 at 12:37 am [Reply]

    Saturday’s MW: is that Hank Hill from King of the Hill in the first panel?

    http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20060624&name=Mary_Worth

87. Mumblix Grumph
    June 24th, 2006 at 1:04 am [Reply]

    I have a bad feeling that Funky is going to wake up missing a kidney.

88. rich
    June 24th, 2006 at 1:19 am [Reply]

    Saturday’s FBOW:

    So there you have it: Paul “Mr.” Wright is an idiot…droolingly exclaiming “Man, have you ever changed!” to Susan “Chipper” Dorkis, right in front of Lizzie. (Granted, Liz has been totally jerking the guy around of late.)

    Lesson: Those handsome studs will only break your heart — better to settle down with a loyal, nebbishy model train (or cinnamon bun) enthusiast who you can really control.

    But come on — a swinging assgrab for someone you haven’t seen since powwows at age 16?? (And could you see his clawlike fingers wriggling in her buttcrack on the animated site?)

89. Len
    June 24th, 2006 at 2:59 am [Reply]

    The last couple of days of Piranha Club have been about… PIRANHAS!

    http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20060624&name=Piranha

    I expect Barney Google to be appearing with Snuffy Smiff any day now.

90. Len
    June 24th, 2006 at 3:45 am [Reply]

    #47 — Mon-ma-tron, that’s not a “Plugger”!

    It’s a “Tugger”!

    At least that puppy isn’t obsessed with vacuum cleaners, like li’l Earl, the next-door neighbor all the kids call “stubby.”

91. Hank Kimble
    June 24th, 2006 at 6:29 am [Reply]

    Anyone else having a problem with a program wanting to switch to Korean Language pop up when coming to this site?

92. MossMoses
    June 24th, 2006 at 7:09 am [Reply]

    87: Is it displaying a dialog box extoling the many virtues of the Dear Leader and asking whether to abort, retry or ignore the missile launch?

93. Frank Drackman
    June 24th, 2006 at 7:37 am [Reply]

    I’d like to see Dr. Jeff and Perfesser Ian in either a steamy gay sex scene, or both bound up with ball gag leather masks in some back room of a Pawn Shop ala pulp fiction. That or Mary discovers Jeffs dead body hanging from the rafters in the expensive Bed& Breakfast shes going to meet him at. Her breaking in on Jeff and Rita in “Flagrant Dilecto” would be awesume also. Or Ian discovering Toby and the Mexican Pool boy in the same situation..

94. dlauthor
    June 24th, 2006 at 8:28 am [Reply]

    06/24:

    Curtis: I think Papa Curtis needs to be a bit more concerned with his son’s dental health, if biting an apple causes pain-stars to fly out of his mouth.

    GF: Even Quebecois? Magic.

    Doonesbury: Trudeau shows some uncharacteristically Tinsley-like timing, what with Count Dickula having staggered out of his crypt earlier this week.

    Spidey: Really? You’re used to battling SUPERVILLAINS? When? Do you do it off-camera, as a break from clinging tenaciously to rear bumpers, mugging for the photographers, and moping around wishing your wife didn’t have a job?

    Mallard: Ah, the “Fillmore Foundation”: for those occasions where Tinsley can’t even fall back on Michelle Malkin for corroboration. Is it too much to ask that his house gets destroyed in some sort of global-warming-related disaster. Let’s see, he lives in Indiana, so … maybe it could get devoured by giant corn or something?

    Foob: Waaah! Lizard feels insignificant! Waaaaah! I have a bad feeling that Lynn’s trying to retcon her way into making Dudley into the villain of this situation. But anything that sends Lizard skulking away at this point is … Jesus, this strip really didn’t piss me off like this before I started reading this blog. Also, what’s up with Chipper’s dialogue, in Panel 1? Do we need to be reminded of Paul’s last name? Or are Lynn’s comic-writing oompah-loompahs that tone-deaf to human conversational patterns?

    F Minus: What’s confusing here is, I’m not sure if the stink-lines are supposed to be visible too.

    Non Sequitur: Please, please tell me this isn’t a signal that Wiley sympathizes with the Tancredo crowd on the immigration issue. Please.

    Prickly: I’m confused, because Stantis is being vague (perhaps in a deliberate, ass-covering way). Does he not like Homeland Security spending in general, or just the wanton, stupid mentality of “let’s give more money to Omaha and less to New York because the terrorists really, really hate wheat”? Because one makes me hate him a little more, and the other makes me like him a little more.

95. yellojkt
    June 24th, 2006 at 8:53 am [Reply]

    Paul “I need to have people call me by my full name so they know who I am” Wright is not getting any “I’m saving myself for Granthony marriage” sympathy hand action relief tonight no matter how hard he clings to Liz’s waist for the rest of the day. One ass-grab cancels every girlfriend hug.

96. dlauthor
    June 24th, 2006 at 8:57 am [Reply]

    Oh, and “we used to get together when our parents took us on the powwow trail”? Really? Did Chipper smoke Suds’s peace pipe and everything?

    Seriously, what’s this line supposed to mean? Do people in the Fooberverse actually have sex for purposes other than generating demonic hellspawn? And speaking of which, is Little Wobin dead yet?

97. MossMoses
    June 24th, 2006 at 9:40 am [Reply]

    “Yes Chesty, there’s more. I’m a flaming poof-dah and have been having unprotected rectal romps with Rex Morgan, MD”.

98. Hank Kimble
    June 24th, 2006 at 10:50 am [Reply]

    MossMoses, the problem seems to be corrected. I logged on this site this time without the dialogue box popping up. I was in the Navy, and I do know that files have compromised my identity, but “I know nothing!”

    Kim Sing Duck and Fu Ku Gil Thorp have nothing to worry about with my posts on this site. (I can neither confirm or deny anything I post on any other site.)

    I know I’m paranoid. BUT, I have received a dialogue box pointing me to Korean language. Maybe Dr. Troy is an alumni of Communist Martyr’s High, and is looking for a code that I do not have.

    I have to go cut my grass now.

99. Hank Kimble
    June 24th, 2006 at 10:53 am [Reply]

    Again MossMoses, did you know that Rice-A-Roni was originally going to be called “Rectal Romps’? the San Francisco Treat?

100. Marc
     June 24th, 2006 at 10:59 am [Reply]

     Sunday MW: Jeff is moving! And they aren’t going to the Bum Boat for his farewell dinner…some place fancier…La Rosa!

     Prediction: Jeff tells her that he can’t handle her rejection anymore and has to move on.

101. Frank Drackman
     June 24th, 2006 at 11:47 am [Reply]

     Dr. Jeffs moving?!?!? Guess those paroled child molester restrictions are really getting strict.

102. Islamorada Girl
     June 24th, 2006 at 12:16 pm [Reply]

     It’s so nice to see the late tobacco heiress Doris Duke dragged out for a guest appearance in Spidernan.

103. Marc
     June 24th, 2006 at 12:21 pm [Reply]

     101 – Yup. And in addition to the molestings, his Paramecium shirt was just scaring the kids too much.

104. BigJoe
     June 24th, 2006 at 12:29 pm [Reply]

     Foobville: Lizzie feels insignificant because two people who haven’t seen each other in years are talking to each other and haven’t acknowledged her for 35 seconds. Whaa, everyone pay attention to me 24/7! Sheesh.

     FW: All that buildup to where they just start stripping to get into the hot tub on Friday and then today it jumps to the next day? That’s some strip tease. (Get it? As in comic strip tease?)

     W of Id: Here’s my nominee for stupidest strip of the day: http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComic.mpl?date=2006/6/24&name=Wizard_of_Id

105. Desoto
     June 24th, 2006 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

     FBOFW: I’ve said it before – http://joshreads.com/?p=532 – and I’ve said it again. (Quote 74)

     FW: Just once, I’d like to actually SEE some teenagers having a good time!

106. Ferd Berfel
     June 24th, 2006 at 2:28 pm [Reply]

     Saturday…

     9CL – Brooke is obviously relying more on fan service and less on writing. Put the nun in that outift and see if Father Durrrr-ley pays attention.

     A3G – Both Lu Ann and Tommie leave in a emotional tizzies, leaving the field open for Margo. And who does she pick? The goober with the Bakelite hair.

     DT – Hey, that was quick. It only took a month or so for the Plentys and Lottie to realize the bags have been switched. What do you think? A late 2008 wrap-up for this one?

     FBOW – All together now… And they called it Injun love…. I love the way Lardass is suddenly all over Tonto like a cheap suit too. She’s been giving him naught but monthly reach-arounds, pity-jerked him into applying for a transfer, and now she’s worried? Hardee-har-har-har. Nice condescending bit about the pow-wow trail too. Lynn, you are a complete ass.

     FBOW animations – It isn’t the animations themselves that creep me out, its the fact that the coolies on the Foob staff even bothered. One poster here dissected them and found they were made up of about 17 separate panels, seventeen panels to get eyes to blink? I think it is all a code or something. Morse for SOS perhaps? Or instructions for Foobian terror cells?

     GF – I was sad when the game show seemed to peter out, but I didn’t realise that it was only a set-up for insanely delightful “Geography by Bucky”!

     MW – It seems the sex offenders registry final caught up with Dr. Jeff.

     RMMD – Speaking of sex offenders, Dr. McCheesey is really laying a bundle of TMI on poor Chesty. He’s an ex-con and convicted swindlet it seems. Wouldn’t the couple of year sized hole in resume have suggested something? Anyway, we finally now know where McCheesey developed his proclivities.

107. Woodrowfan
     June 24th, 2006 at 3:20 pm [Reply]

     JP: girls don’t like ugly guys!!! Gasp, how shallow! Good things guys will look beyond physical attractiveness… (eye roll).

     Funky: Any bets that the guy now falls in love but she just wanted to have one night’s fun? Either that, or she’s “with child” and wanted somebody olther than the real daddy to set up in the paternity suit….(hey, FW has been dark the last couple of years). Of course, it could just be a STD storyline, which for Funky counts as “light-hearted”

108. Len
     June 24th, 2006 at 4:01 pm [Reply]

     Raju would know that 108 is an auspicious number in Hinduism and Buddhism. Mangalam (auspiciousnes) to the Curmudgeons!

109. Islamorada Girl
     June 24th, 2006 at 8:58 pm [Reply]

     It occurs to me that if you tried to explain this site to outsiders, it would be impossible. You just have to be here and experience it. Oh, and read the comics faithfully.

110. J.P. Patches
     June 24th, 2006 at 9:59 pm [Reply]

     65: “JP Patches? Holy crap…did you bring Boris S. Wart with you? He’s the 2nd meanest man in the world, you know…”

     Don’t talk to me, I’m clinically depressed from living in the City Dump for almost 50 years….

111. Marc
     June 24th, 2006 at 11:33 pm [Reply]

     A3G – Woah! Double head-bobble today…from Luann and Connie Chung in drag.

     MW – Bye Bye lover boy! Take that ugly “modern art” with you, too!

     FW: I’m sensing the writer hasn’t gotten it on in quite a while now….teens in a hot tub and some poor woman with metastizing Cancer.

112. Dub Not Dubya
     June 25th, 2006 at 1:18 am [Reply]

     Sunday’s JP:

     http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20060625&name=Judge_Parker

     “The King of Geeks lives in India.” Hmm. I’m not up to it at the moment, but it’s begging for a filk to the tune of “King of Pain.” Anyone wanna give it a shot? “King of Geeks, I will always be King of Geeks!”

113. rich
     June 25th, 2006 at 1:19 am [Reply]

     91, 98: Hey, I just logged on late Sunday night and got the Korean language popup too! Actually the second time for me. Could it be that a link in someone’s post contains Korean characters?

     94: I agree, dlauthor — this Prickly installment was especially wimpy. Lately Stantis has been slipping in these half-assed criticisms of the Bush team alongside his usual conservative talking points. Like he’s inching across a tightrope — wanting to be a good party-member and defend his leader, but also watching to see if history, possibly very soon, is going to declare this administration to be the worst one ever. Then like all the Nixon critics who came out of the woodwork late in the game, he can say “yep, I knew he was bad all along –and I said so!”

114. AppleGirl
     June 25th, 2006 at 2:23 am [Reply]

     #102 – Islamorada Girl, love your reference to the late tobacco heiress Doris Duke.

     #109 – And yes, I’ve tried to describe this site and why I am spewing Pepsi out of my nose laughing so hard, and I’ve been met with the condescending smile at best.

115. Rozenn
     June 25th, 2006 at 4:20 am [Reply]

     “JP: girls don’t like ugly guys!!! Gasp, how shallow! Good things guys will look beyond physical attractiveness… (eye roll).”

     HE says they don’t like him because he’s poor and ugly. The REAL reason I think is because talks about himself in the third person. Creepy.

     Honestly : “My mind is blown, you have deceived and humiliated Raju !” and of course, “we would be married and have little Rajus”.

116. Rozenn
     June 25th, 2006 at 4:24 am [Reply]

     Way to go making a “smart” person talk like a moron to convey the fact he’s a foreigner. Idiot. Or to Indians really talk like that ?

117. Hank Kimble
     June 25th, 2006 at 6:22 am [Reply]

     MW 6/25– Mary Worth eats at the Bum Boat? I thought that was Rex and Troy’s favorite haunt.

118. MossMoses
     June 25th, 2006 at 9:21 am [Reply]

     Bob Dole talks about Bob Dole in the 3rd (Bob Dole) person.

     Doc Jeff finally tired of the frigid, platitude spouting, meddling old hag? Those lonely chicken choking nights must have taken their toll…

119. Mibbitmaker
     June 25th, 2006 at 9:27 am [Reply]

     MW: Yes, today Dr. Denied is finally fed up and taking a powder. I saw the Saturday strip, Doc. Run, Doc, run, before Mare and her lady friends start comparing our gender to cowboys!!…

     FOOB: “Chipper & Suds” sounds like an early ’70s buddy picture. Apparently, dopey nicknames are all the rage in Mtigabolaponga.

     One Big Happy: “#69 on my list: ignored advances from vacuum cleaner. Poor thing. Hey, I’m just trying to be a better person. My name is Earl.”

     FW: He oughta turn in his membership in teenage guy-dom. Then again, if he did go through with it, she might’ve started mocking his teeth instead of being interested.

120. Frank Drackman
     June 25th, 2006 at 9:44 am [Reply]

     The “Finger Quotin Margo ” contest was great..but..what about a “Marvella” contest for a follow up?? I have a thing about chicks in superhero costumes.

121. Marc
     June 25th, 2006 at 10:17 am [Reply]

     MW: I predict Mary will be convincing Dr. Jeff..Child Molester MD to not move and that they can have a relationship. BUT WHY MUST IT DRAG OUT FOR SO LONG???

122. Chaz
     June 25th, 2006 at 11:52 am [Reply]

     Wait a minute. Whose left hand *is* that in panel 1 of Spiderman? It’s emerging from *behind* Hugo’s boss’s shoulder.

     Although, if her left arm bends that way, that might explain why she didn’t get the role.

123. anonymous
     June 25th, 2006 at 12:19 pm [Reply]

     Brenda Starr: Does anyone but me think the “American Reporter” TV reality show being judged by Randy, Paula, and Simon is the lamest idea ever? Even BRENDA said as much last week. Good drawings of them, though.

124. NotThatGuy
     June 25th, 2006 at 1:12 pm [Reply]

     #122, maybe her arm bending is her superpower!

     I second the Marvella contest, but the contestants need a big M on their face.

125. Grendell
     June 25th, 2006 at 1:19 pm [Reply]

     #123: I do! They also never show what the reporters actually do to be rated on. How can that be a good tv show? The writer obviously hasn’t a clue what the job of a reporter is, except getting tied up by fat celeb chefs and being set on fire with the help of extra native olive oil. And I still haven’t figured out whether Hank is male or female.

126. Chet McCord, Wildlife Defender
     June 25th, 2006 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

     Alas! I cannot find a web version of the sunday Spider-man. Any suggestions?

127. jonnya
     June 25th, 2006 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

     New Foob Animation !!

     Just a quickie, but I wonder if I cleaned it up would Lynn give me job? I’m so underemployed right now.

     (3.35 mb quicktime. Let it load up)

     http://acebonestudios.com/pages/foob.html

128. Bill Peschel
     June 25th, 2006 at 4:40 pm [Reply]

     At least Monday’s MW opens this new segment of “(Our) Life in Hell” with Mary getting a shocker.

129. Marc
     June 25th, 2006 at 4:55 pm [Reply]

     127 – Hilarious!!!!!

     Bill (128): I know, I can’t wait! Details at a little past midnight!

130. Old Fogeyette
     June 25th, 2006 at 5:50 pm [Reply]

     #123: I haven’t seen the other “reality” shows, but I always imagined them to be just like this one. Are you saying they aren’t this lame?

     #127: I love your animation! Very funny and very appropriate.

131. Doug Puthoff
     June 25th, 2006 at 6:51 pm [Reply]

     The more I read “Spider-Man,” the more I believe Stan Lee (or whoever is writing it) should be yanked violently from the stirp and replaced with Ann Coulter.

132. DocForbin
     June 25th, 2006 at 8:50 pm [Reply]

     I just have that feeling that when Elizabeth returns to Toronto, Anthony will hit up on her to go steady with him now that he and Therese are going Splitsville. However, Elizabeth will do the right thing, tell Anthony to stop living in the past, and then will dump the helicopter pilot then get the news that the cop won’t be transferring down after all. After that, Elly and John will make a speech about how true love waits for the right person, then Elizabeth will decide to return to the Indian village after all and sign a new teaching contract, convinced that she doesn’t need a man in her life right now.

     Also, I have to disagree about Funky Winnkerbean. I think it’s one of the funniest comics out there. I got really pissed off when the Glens Falls [NY] Post-Star yanked it all on the say-so of Editor-in-Chief Ken Tingley’s bratty eight-year-old son because he didn’t think it was funny. What did they replace FW with in the PS? That stupid Cleats comic strip, once again on the recommendation of Tingley’s kid because he’s a soccer nut.

     Sorry, but I think that jokes about breast cancer, stepping on landmines, divorce and suicide are way funnier than jokes about soccer, a sport that 99.99% of Americans really don’t give a damn about. I need that hit of schadenfreud so I can cope with my dreary existence slaving away at a print shop in Upstate New York.

     I want Funky Winkerbean back in the Post-Star and I want it back NOW!!!!!!!!!! :-(

133. Grendell
     June 26th, 2006 at 9:26 am [Reply]

     It’s football ;P
     I guess Cleats sucks anyway.

134. rich
     June 26th, 2006 at 9:45 am [Reply]

     127: Brilliant!

135. Devil in the Drain
     June 26th, 2006 at 1:18 pm [Reply]

     #127 (jonnya) Brilliant! Last panel of the animation had me laughing and choking, all at once.

136. LEX
     June 26th, 2006 at 2:21 pm [Reply]

     I guess Earl from One Big Happy is just a sucker for suckers.

     And mowers.

137. Dan Perducci
     June 26th, 2006 at 6:26 pm [Reply]

     and yet there are no messages referring to guys sticking their naughty bits into a vaccuum cleaner. isn’t that referred to in ’scary movie?’ the ‘doofy’ character that clearly spoofs david arquette?!

     p.s. – just don’t stick your naughty bits into a riding lawn mower, earl!!! don’t do it!!!

138. Anonymous
     June 27th, 2006 at 9:51 pm [Reply]

     Rozenn
     My husband is from India and he doesn’t talk like that. I’ve never heard any Indians refer to themselves in the third person.

     However, the clothes are pretty right on.

139. DocForbin
     June 27th, 2006 at 9:58 pm [Reply]

     I also fearlessly predict that before it’s all over, Elizabeth and Therese will get into a big catfight when Therese blames Elizabeth for her divorce. The only question that needs to be asked will be: Mud, Jell-O or cooking oil? :-D

140. mdrew
     June 28th, 2006 at 8:11 am [Reply]

     Raju doesn’t even look vaguely Indian, but he does have awfully long thigh bones.
     Are those femurs?

141. Anonymous
     June 28th, 2006 at 11:02 am [Reply]

     re:140

     I agree…the face is all wrong.

     And what’s up with those glasses? I mean, if you’re going to do the glasses=geek thing, well, ok…but who wears glasses like that?

     Oh wait… the “personally bitter” author of the strip himself(http://the7am.com/news/articles/?id=26568) wears those glasses. Hmmm.

142. Adam
     October 10th, 2007 at 6:47 pm [Reply]

     I know I’m way late on this one, but I actually thought Jeff was barbecuing his clothes to dispose of some evidence in Mary Worth.

143. my
     November 20th, 2008 at 5:14 pm [Reply]

     One of the best file searchers and download centers is here http://newfileengine.com/
     Find al the necessary information there!

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