The Comics Curmudgeon

Main content:

Metapost: Inside scoop!

Earlier this week, I noted a sudden change in style in Judge Parker. This prompted what I am reasonably sure is my very first comics insider tip. The tipster has asked to remain anonymous, and I have no idea how accurate any of the info is, but I’m passing it on to all of you … the short version is, new Judge Parker artist Eduardo Barreto for circumstances beyond this control (not due to dissatisfaction with his work) had take a bit of time off from the strip. He’s back at work already, but we’re just now getting the strips from his absence (remember that there’s a multiweek lead time with this stuff). This week’s strips are being done by none other than Graham Nolan, of Rex Morgan and Sunday Phantom fame. (Woody Wilson is the writer of both JP and RMMD, for what it’s worth.) He was only able to do it for a week because of his other commitments, so we’ll be getting another artist for the rest of the month, with Barreto back in January.

Today’s strip in particular looks quite Morganic. Many people noticed that Randy looked a lot like Rex, which isn’t going to help him convince anyone that he’s “the marrying kind.”

My source tells me that Barreto has actually ghosted for Nolan in the past, which goes a long way towards explaining this and this.

This entry was posted on Friday, December 8, 2006 at 02:56 am and is filed under Judge Parker, metaposts.

274 responses to “Metapost: Inside scoop!”

edgeways
December 8th, 2006 at 3:00 am [Reply]

drunk lady’s glasses change from time to time, perhaps she exudes a contact high
BetterNever
December 8th, 2006 at 4:51 am [Reply]

Sorry – I can not wait till the latest FBOFW is noted.

The Patterson-cult family plan is taking hold on Liz, and its scary. After her phone call warning us that her policeman-boyfriend whats his name is coming to visit, and thus finally confront Granthony – who will in turn probably beat on him – Liz is being brought further down into the cult by her evil sister and father. Observe today, she is suddenly brainwashed into acting like a thirteen-year old imbecilic moron. Has the author no shame left…
Leo K
December 8th, 2006 at 5:21 am [Reply]

What I want to know is, how does that reporter talk out of her armpit like that?
benro
December 8th, 2006 at 6:23 am [Reply]

I think that’s actually the right breast doing the talking.
efab
December 8th, 2006 at 6:30 am [Reply]

FBOFW: The shaking text in the ultimate panel was a fine choice for the requisite movement.
Chris
December 8th, 2006 at 6:46 am [Reply]

Reporter to be featured in Maxim any day now.
Jerry Only
December 8th, 2006 at 6:59 am [Reply]

7th post I rule.
Oh and Mary worth should be discussed.
Pinback65
December 8th, 2006 at 7:04 am [Reply]

3-G–Can anybody explain why Blaze is putting emphasis on the word “trap”? And for that matter, isn’t it about time for the storyline to arbitrarily shift over to Tommie doing…whatever the hell she does?
Chris
December 8th, 2006 at 8:16 am [Reply]

Tom Dewey is about to go OJ on Ella in Mary Worth.
gh
December 8th, 2006 at 8:25 am [Reply]

@225 (yesterday) Poteet

I don’t know the protocol for “carrying over” but I was ready to respond when I was rudely dragged away from the computer. It’s “earn a living this” and “put food on the table” that. Jeez. Anyway, one last Diana Rigg reference and I’ll stop, I swear.

About 3-4 years ago I heard Scott Simon, host of NPR’s “Weekend Edition” (and IMHO, a Susan Stamberg wannabe) interviewing Diana Rigg. This is the kind of guy who’ll casually slip into an interview, apropos of nothing, the fact that he was roughed up by Daly’s cops at the ‘68 Democratic Convention. Mr. Pretentious. But in this interview you can actually HEAR him blushing over the radio, he’s so awestruck at her presence. He’s practically squealing “It’s Emma Peel! It’s Ema Peel! I can’t believe I’m talking to Emma Peel!” and she’s saying, in her graceful, tasteful, elegant sixties, “Well, Scottie, that was quite a while ago. It’s Dame Diana Rigg now, and you do know Emma isn’t a real person, don’t you?” and he’s going “No! It’s you! Ooo! Ooo! Do that thing you do!” and so, smiling demurely she steps back and with a swift kick clips him under the chin with the toe of her 4 inch stilleto heeled calf high leather boot and he drops like a slaughterhouse steer, a smile of pure satisfaction on his face. OK, I made that last part up, but it was the wierdest interview I’ve ever heard.
Maughta
December 8th, 2006 at 8:31 am [Reply]

MT: Freakiest. Close-up. Ever.

Curtis: We learn that “I am the Lord your Gd who led you out of Egypt,” “Thou shalt have no other Gds before me, you shall not make an idol,” and “Keep the Sabbath holy” are just a guideline to maintain a nice, safe community. Yeah, an authoritarian, theocratic community.
Harry Paratestes
December 8th, 2006 at 8:36 am [Reply]

MW: Double Holy Shit, it’s a huge crossover! First, Thomas Dewey/Gary Dent is visited by Dickens’ “The Ghost of Christmas Affairs Future”, and what a grim spectre it is! Talk about seasonal sights crossovers. Second, he’s having an affair with Mimi, the exotic club dancer from ‘Rent’. Maybe he’ll burst into an aria in a few days. He’s probably got AIDS from Mimi, and it’ll be his swan song.
AhClem
December 8th, 2006 at 8:52 am [Reply]

MW – I think Mr. Dent’s paramour is Mimi from the Drew Carey Show. That might explain his obsession with 90-year old biddies (Why, I have no idea).
smacky
December 8th, 2006 at 9:18 am [Reply]

MW: I have been living in a haze of bitterness for weeks after the senseless death of Aldo, but Oh My God! A giant Ella Byrd astral-projecting herself into the apartment of a super-pissed Walt Disney… I’m back on board. Go kill her, Walt! It’s because of her that your wife left you the philanderer and took the car!
Concerned Citizen
December 8th, 2006 at 9:35 am [Reply]

JP – The reporter is an Ã¼berbabe, and the fact that she skewered that insufferable asswipe makes her Margoesque hot. I hope she takes it easy on the drunken wife who is rapidly becoming my favorite comic strip character, it would kill me if she were to dry out or become an anonymous barfly in some seedy den of iniquity. The latter is OK if I get to watch.
SarcasticAcid
December 8th, 2006 at 9:39 am [Reply]

All right, I know that colorists must get bored and have to change it up every once in a while, but what’s with the eerily shaded reporters in broad daylight in the first panel? At first I thought I had missed something and he was being interrogated by the council of town elders.
Old Fogeyette
December 8th, 2006 at 9:47 am [Reply]

First, the art in RMMD (and I guess one week of JP): it reminds me more and more of the comic books I used to read as a kid, with all the overdramatized perspective and chiaroscuro. It seems strange to see it on regular daily comics. Just saying.

Second, MW: has just gotten too weird for me. I think I’ll stop reading until it gets back into the daily life of Mary and Jeff and Charterstone.

Third, MT: On the one hand, I’m relieved that Theodore is about to get rescued by Molly. On the other hand, I’m disgusted at the author for providing what we in the kids’ thriller-writing business used to call a CHEAP THRILL (a cliff-hanger that turns out not to be anything. For example, “As Gordon waited alone in the haunted house he suddenly felt a hand on his neck.” End of chapter. Next chapter, it turns out to be his friend Timmy who has been in there with him all along. Or another example: Theodore steps into the otter trap. And then he easily extricates himself.) And no, I’m no longer in the kids’ thriller-writing business.

Finally, who the heck is that big-headed kid in the jeep with Mark? Is that Rusty? Is Rusty Mark’s son? Does anyone know the details of Mark’s private life?
Dingo
December 8th, 2006 at 9:53 am [Reply]

#10 GH: Thank you, thank you, thank you for that story. You made me guffaw like a $20 whore at a Legionnaires convention.
anne
December 8th, 2006 at 9:54 am [Reply]

Wow today’s great for giant looming scary things. First we have this strange child in MT who looks like a hobbit or something with bad teeth. By the way, is this Mark’s child? If so, why does he call him “Mark” and not “Dad”? “Mark, look, my face is freakishly huge! Take me to a dentist!”

Then we have the Ella, the happy ghost! Or, I should say, the concerned and kindly ghost. I spit out coffee when I saw her! Yeah, I bet Gary Dent knows who told his wife about his affair; it’s probably the giant looming Ella-projection in his living room. “Blast! I knew I should have sold that Ella projector at the garage sale!”
anne
December 8th, 2006 at 9:58 am [Reply]

12 &13: I think Mr. Dent is having an affair with a toy poodle.
Bob
December 8th, 2006 at 9:59 am [Reply]

June Morgan: Dominatrix. I think Nikki is about to get his reward for cleaning up. of course the reward is going to be more punishment, but at least she’ll be wearing leather this time.
Cornwhacker
December 8th, 2006 at 10:03 am [Reply]

12-13: Don’t forget, “Mimi” is also the name of Randy’s one-time fiancee in Judge Parker. Poor gal had to move on since Randy’s Not the Marrying Kind.
cheech wizard
December 8th, 2006 at 10:04 am [Reply]

MW – We learn that 90-year-old Ella has expired in the brief time it took Thomas Dewey to drive home. Now, her unquiet will haunt him forever for refusing to heed her counsel.

But seriously, WTF? For a hotshot, fee-charging clairvoyant, Ella’s advice is less than timely. Even if Dewey decided to end the affair, his wife’s already left him by the time he got home. At least he didn’t throw more good money after bad by picking up a dozen roses on the way home.
David C
December 8th, 2006 at 10:04 am [Reply]

#17: Depending on when you were a kid, you might very well have read comics by Graham Nolan, who did a lot of super-hero comics during the ’80s and ’90s, most prominently long runs on Detective Comics (starring Batman) and Hawkworld.

He and Barreto are some of the best comics artists around in either books or strips, IMO, and it speaks well of whoever makes the hiring decisions for JP and RMMD.
Dan Coyle
December 8th, 2006 at 10:09 am [Reply]

#17 Old Fogeyette: That’s probably because both Graham Nolan and Eduardo Barreto have spent the better part of their careers drawing superhero comics; Barreto still keeps a toe in that field.

I always thought Nolan was a sort of overdramatic storyteller- the female lead in Hawkworld, a battle hardended space cop who had grown up in an alien ghetto, seemed to react to everything by crying a lot. Everyone! Always! Makes! Big! Faces!

Whereas Barreto is more subtle than that. Hell, his drawing it got me to read Judge Parker. Actually, I wouldn’t have even known Judge Parker still EXISTED if not for Barreto drawing it.
TB Tabby
December 8th, 2006 at 10:10 am [Reply]

MT: Notice how the jeep has left the ground in the first panel. How fast are they driving?!
Old Fogeyette
December 8th, 2006 at 10:12 am [Reply]

#24 and 25, thanks for the explanations. I’m rethinking my opinion and have decided that it’s actually a good thing to have the dramatic art. I guess my problem is that it’s good art in service to mostly stupid storytelling.
anne
December 8th, 2006 at 10:15 am [Reply]

26. that squirrel on the tree is saying “jesus christ that jeep is going fast! If they don’t slow down, they’ll get in an accident!” Hence the astonished look on his face. Either that or we’re in the bizarro-Slylock Fox world, where animals always have shocked and horrified looks on their faces instead of humans. Maybe the squirrel is saying, “Look, those humans are talking and driving a jeep! Before you know it they’ll be solving crimes!”
cheech wizard
December 8th, 2006 at 10:15 am [Reply]

Today, Dick Tracy, recognizing that he’s in a profound state of mental confusion and facing a situtation he does not understand, decides that the solution is to go get his gun.
Dingo
December 8th, 2006 at 10:16 am [Reply]

Dateline: CHARTERSTONE

It’s curtains for Ella Byrd.
TB Tabby
December 8th, 2006 at 10:17 am [Reply]

Slylock Fox has abondoned the arbitrary mysteries in favor of a three-panel comic strip today. It turned out about as well as you’d evpeck.
Meanwhile
December 8th, 2006 at 10:17 am [Reply]

MT: I cannot for the life of me figure out why the word balloon in the first panel isn’t coming from the giant squirrel’s ass. This throws everything I know and love about Mark Trail on its ear. What the [Margo] is going on?!?!?
hogenmogen
December 8th, 2006 at 10:19 am [Reply]

That is an interesting link from Josh. The RMMD from August 2004 is talking about the sad fact that Heather will soon be leaving their moon-faced child to fend for herself in the wild jungles of daycare. Two years later, she still hasn’t left and Sawah isn’t one day older or any less moony.
anne
December 8th, 2006 at 10:24 am [Reply]

30 Dingo: that made me snort.
hogenmogen
December 8th, 2006 at 10:27 am [Reply]

My 2-year old kid calls her grandmother “Mimi”. The grandmother made it up, and I have no idea why. Let’s just say that Mr. Dent should have stuck with his wife on that one.
srah
December 8th, 2006 at 10:45 am [Reply]

Maybe the writer of A3C reads The Comics Curmudgeon and was trying to do some kind of Mark Trail shout-out.

“Promise me you won’t stay in this fire-trap alone! Because the beaver got his foot stuck in a trap! Please notice me!”
Concerned Citizen
December 8th, 2006 at 10:53 am [Reply]

10 – Ah, Diana Rigg…the hottest TV woman, ever. I never missed The Avengers except when she left, her replacement was ghastly. Anyway, when I was in college in the 70’s, an English professor ran the film of Midsummer’s Night Dream one evening. The room was packed with men. He was gratified to see all of the interest in the film until he realized that everyone was there to see a topless Diana Rigg! It was the partial fulfillment of a boyhood dream.
mattt
December 8th, 2006 at 10:53 am [Reply]

30 – I hope so, Dingo. I remember the strips when Ella first moved in and thinking, “Man, that place could really use some new curtains.”
Concerned Citizen
December 8th, 2006 at 10:56 am [Reply]

OK, after my cold shower…

Yesterday’s MW – Only in the Worthian universe does an angry woman refer to her no good shit of a husband as a philanderer.
jules
December 8th, 2006 at 11:05 am [Reply]

That giant squirrel just knows Buck will be glad to get back on the road with Molly…and now Squirrelly will devour this delicious acorn with “Jack Elrod” written on it!
Concerned Citizen
December 8th, 2006 at 11:10 am [Reply]

Oh yeah, I didn’t mean to imply that Diana Rigg was a woman constructed out of TV parts, sort of like the title character in Pynchon’s V, I just meant that she was an actress on television. But you probably knew that, well nevermind…
jules
December 8th, 2006 at 11:12 am [Reply]

#39 Also only in the MW Universe does a woman say to her 8-month-old, “We’re leaving your father the philanderer!” However, just like in our universe, the 8-month-old responds with a sweet smile and a big ole runner of drool on Mom’s favorite sweater.
Anon
December 8th, 2006 at 11:14 am [Reply]

Thanks for the clarification CC, #41. When you were talking about TV women, I started thinking about guys like Fencepost Frank in fishnets, a bustier, and heels.
BewaretheCreeper
December 8th, 2006 at 11:18 am [Reply]

Naked pictures of Dame Dianna Rigg can be found on the internet.

9CL The laughs just keep on coming. Still cant stop.

Mary Worth Ella is going to get an education on why you dont interfere in someones sex life.

F*up Winkerbean Not only is the Bull showing his classlesness but he’s announcing it to the world also.

Curtis Barry the smart brother “gets it” Curtis the rapping idiot doesn’t, a Mallard Fillmore moment if there ever was one.

Gil Thorp Happiness is losing your leg and an important High School Football game. This strip is awesome.

Judge Parker Oh here we go again, people with families are f*d up and people who dont are cool.
Another Mallard Fillmore moment.

Luann and Brad Degroot on how to be a REAL loser in relationships. Will be available on the internet soon, we hope. Just do the opposite of what they do and you will be fine.

Zits Well Jeremy at least I HAVE my clothes ON. That’s not a compliment either!
insolenttomato
December 8th, 2006 at 11:32 am [Reply]

Damn! In panel one of JP the reporter is looking VERY heroin chic! Even her microphone has that Kate Moss droopiness going on.

Also, I like Celeste’s black lipstick in the final panel. Very goth. Sorta explains the fact that she runs to the sauce to escape the buttoned up world of judicial politics.
AppleGirl
December 8th, 2006 at 11:36 am [Reply]

MW – I feel disappointed that we haven’t seen Mimi. It would be useful for us to be able to compare Mimi with Mrs. Dent, so we could decide who Thomas Dewey should really be with.

And what about Dr. Jeff Cory? Any texts from Cambodia, Mary?

JP – Okay, drunken wife. But what about Abbey and Neddy in Paris? And how’s Raju getting along with the boat-wrestling team?

RMMD – How are you gonna repay me that $150? Oh, YEAH! June, June, June. You nasty girl.

MT – I haven’t been able to look at Mark Trail since I saw the guy setting the cruel steel-jawed trap. And now I’m reading comments about genormous scary children in the LoFo. Let me know when it’s safe to return.
Alan Vanneman
December 8th, 2006 at 11:36 am [Reply]

Hello! We’re supposed to be talking about Josh’s metapost, which was unbelievably “inside.” For the first time in my life I feel “hep”–you know, “with it,” as the kids say. And the links! So meta! I thought at first the gags were “meta,” like, they weren’t there, until I scrolled down about 23 feet. Yeah, you have to work for your yuks, but they’re worth it!
David C
December 8th, 2006 at 11:36 am [Reply]

I continue to be amused by the way the threat of judicial election opponent Black (what’s his first name, again) will apparently resolve itself completely independently, as his election campaign self-destructs without the slightest intervention by Randy, Sam, or the funny-lookin’ old coot.
AppleGirl
December 8th, 2006 at 11:46 am [Reply]

FBOFW – I don’t see why Lizard isn’t going up to Mitzigaynor to spend the holidays with Paul. She’s a teacher, she’s got the week off, why isn’t she booking her plane tickets?

Oh yeah. I forgot. We need to set up a total flake-out of Paul. He’ll be snowed in up north, won’t make it down to the suburbs, and Lizard will be broken-hearted because it’s CHRISTMAS, dammit! How could he miss CHRISTMAS? And Granthony will be there to comfort her.

Ew.
imity
December 8th, 2006 at 11:49 am [Reply]

This possibly isn’t QUITE the freakiest Mark Trail closeup ever.

Last year sometime we had the moment when the panel abruptly zoomed in on a trusty woodsman, whose face revealed at least a month’s worth of Ed Dodd’s careful shading.

I also recall at least one extreme close-up of Kelly Welly’s eyes, Bollywood musical style.

(Dang. I should really be remembering the chirality of all the aminon acids, and my mind holds onto this stuff in its stead…)
Randy S
December 8th, 2006 at 11:49 am [Reply]

Friday ’s Mary Worth has Mr. Dent resembling Rock Hudson in both panels.
Also, the middle panel of Mark Trail, the close-up of the little kid’s face looks like Dick York.

And now that Gary Dent’s full name is revealed, the anagrammists can get to work.
Just a few to get started:
A dry gent
Dry agent
Edgy rant
Gay trend
Get randy
AhClem
December 8th, 2006 at 11:49 am [Reply]

FORESHADOW (v) — To present an indication or a suggestion of beforehand; presage. c.f. “Apartment 3G”, 12/8/06, 3rd panel, “fire-trap” comment.

Remember, you heard it here first.
insolenttomato
December 8th, 2006 at 11:50 am [Reply]

#47, AV: You’re right! Sorry about that. I have Depeche Mode playing in the background, and I saw Celeste’s black lipstick, and the waifish reporter, and I was remembering my high school glory days as a goth writing incredibly bad poetry at the lunch table and thinking I looked SOOOOOO amazing dressed all in black and striving to look like I was in the terminal stages of drug addiction.

Anyways, Eduardo Barreto had to take some “time off from work” due to “circumstances beyond his control?” But not due to “the quality of his work?” Is this a parallel to “taking time off to be with your family” in the world of politics? I’m thinking booze (Celeste?), embezzling Native American nations (Mr. Black = Tom Delay??), or harassing underage pages (Nikki???).

It’s all coming together. In way that means completely apart.
hogenmogen
December 8th, 2006 at 11:55 am [Reply]

Comic headlines today for those comics that are stuck in a perpetual rut:

BC: It’s one of those “You know.. “’s. This one involves dog poop. Don’t bother. And speaking of dogs -

Marmaduke – still a big dog

9CL – more random wordless panels

Zippy: Incomprehensible as ever

Dennis-the-occasionally-misbehaving-kid is promising to be good for Christmas

Family Circus: Still way too saccharine

For Worse: Have a conversation with a friend or co-worker. Chances are five or six funny things will be said, each one wittier than the punch line in any given Foobville, for which Lynn Johnson spends each day thinking, re-thinking, tinkering and carefully crafting.

Lockhorns: Loretta makes a sarcastic remark to someone who couldn’t care less. This is actually news, as Leroy occasionally gets one in.

Mallard: War on Christmas is over, now stuck in “Congress is stupid – because they don’t agree with me” mode.

Spiderman: Doc Ock gets tired of waiting for Spiderman six weeks after we all did.

Ziggy the perpetual loser confesses his embarrassing situation to his shrink. “I left my worries on my doorstep and someone posted them on the internet!” Either the shrink is the culprit and is worried that he will be found out, or the shrink is ruffled because like most people in the comics, he only has a passing knowledge of what this “internet” thing is. Whatever – Ziggy is still a bald little loser. I guess what really bothers me about Ziggy is that he’s a mild-mannered loser. He’s been ridden so hard by this harsh life that he doesn’t even expect to succeed. He takes noxious insults from service people in stride because he knows he doesn’t deserve to be treated better. He’s resigned to his sad fate of living all alone but for his talking animal friends who also insult him at every chance. If he cares so little for his own basic dignity that he puts up with disparging commentary from mice, why should we?

Hi & Louis: That rock music is wacky! Who knows what those crazy kids will think of next!
Old Fogeyette
December 8th, 2006 at 11:57 am [Reply]

Also off the topic of Josh’s excellent post, today’s F Minus is very funny if you have a certain kind of mind, and I think we all do:

http://www.comics.com/comics/fminus/index.html
SmartPeopleOnIce
December 8th, 2006 at 12:08 pm [Reply]

Dicking the doorbell the other day and now this, the unfortunate naming of the protagonist in DT just keeps on giving.

[ Yeah, yeah, so I have the sense of humor of a seventh-grade boy. Bite me. How often I longed to be a woman, perchance that I might rise above the bitter curse of this affliction (well, that, and, you know, boobies). ]
ChefMike
December 8th, 2006 at 12:13 pm [Reply]

49: And then John and Elly can be all “Thank goodness our Anthony was able to be here for you this Christmas! I bet if he lived 8 hours away in a tiny native village he wouldn’t let a little thing like inclement weather stop him from visiting. That gosh darn Paul is just so unreliable.”
Curtis: I still would like to know what exactly the ten commandments have to do with the Christmas story.
FW: No, Les. It would have been too much information if bull had said something like, “I’d really like to have kids, but since the wedding that bitch has just been totally frigid.” or, “I’m thinking about asking my doctor about Erectile dysfunction, seems that since the wedding ‘Little Bull’ isn’t as inclined to charge anymore”
TDIET: Yes, Television is evil. It’s not like when little Hekkie goes to school he’s going to pick those words up from his friends, even if you keep him away from the set, amirite?
MW: Walt Disney is upset because the artist he hired to sculpt the creepy bust of Ella Byrd had it rendered in granite. he had specifically asked for her to be cast in bronze. “Heads will roll for this!” thought Walt as he crumpled up the invoice and looked for somewhere to throw it.
Mike
December 8th, 2006 at 12:15 pm [Reply]

MW: I see a touch of Aldo in Thomas Dewey (it must be the scowl he has today). Perhaps the next stop for him, before he goes to exact his revenge on Ella, will be to see his good friend “Johnny.”
anne
December 8th, 2006 at 12:17 pm [Reply]

57 SPOI, being a woman does not necessarily preclude having that affliction, which I am OK with. I mean, what’s wrong with giggling a bit more? You’re right about the boobies, though. I guess it’s a shame that I prefer men (except for Diana Rigg).
AppleGirl
December 8th, 2006 at 12:19 pm [Reply]

59 – Oh, please, please, please, let it be true! We haven’t seen our good friend “Johnny” in ages. And it’s the holidays, dammit!
The Bitter Wolf
December 8th, 2006 at 12:23 pm [Reply]

FC – There’s a good wake-up noise? And here I always want to go back to sleep.
Concerned Citizen
December 8th, 2006 at 12:23 pm [Reply]

Today’s MT would be great if the balloons had some incomprehensible language no one understands. With the levitating jeep, giant squirrel, giant face, white dog snout in panel three, it looks like nature on acid.
Concerned Citizen
December 8th, 2006 at 12:28 pm [Reply]

Pursuant to my earlier obsession, Morticia Addams, Queen of 60’s Goth, runs a very close second.
Meanwhile
December 8th, 2006 at 12:31 pm [Reply]

51: Randy S, I think you’re onto something! The obvious anagram for the philanderer Gary Dent would be “Get randy,” but I find it far more likely that “Mimi” is some drag queen’s stage name, lending much credence to the anagram “Gay trend.” Poor Mr. Dent is simply tired of living a life of tacitly enforced repression and is set to burst forth from the quiet agony of the closet.

This also explains his flamboyantly expressive “jazz hands.”
johncomic
December 8th, 2006 at 12:43 pm [Reply]

“Tish! That’s French!!”
Gal Friday
December 8th, 2006 at 12:44 pm [Reply]

#17–MT As I vaguely remember from 20+ years ago–and because comic strip characters cannot procreate–Mark Trail adopted little Rusty, some trouble-prone orphan. And I can’t remember, did Mark finally marry Cherry?
Gatormom
December 8th, 2006 at 12:56 pm [Reply]

#49: AppleGirl, I’m afraid, deathly afraid, you’re right.

Insert Granthony and his jolly little elves joke here.

I can’t bear to watch the train wreck.
Jad-ben-Otho
December 8th, 2006 at 1:01 pm [Reply]

#63: Bwahahaha! Perfect! Comment of the Week!
Poteet
December 8th, 2006 at 1:18 pm [Reply]

#10 — gh, I just had to thank you. That was a wonderful story. And it doesn’t surprise me. My most vivid memory of our family trip to Expo 67 in Montreal was me despairing because the local TV station didn’t carry THE AVENGERS and I would have to miss Diana Rigg. Seeing her in person would melt what’s left of my brain.

#49 — AppleGirl, I very distinctly remember that the original plan was for Lizardbreath to go north to visit Paul at Christmas. Now he has to go through the hassle of travel, which is obviously fine with her. And she won’t see Jesse after solemnly promising that she’d see him again. Right now I hate her more than Michael and Granthony, which is saying a lot.
Dingo
December 8th, 2006 at 1:32 pm [Reply]

I found a longer video of the bear/trampoline mishap. It’s from Craig Kilborn.

Oh, Molly. Molly girl. Will they ever understand you, your needs, your desire to careen down a road or from a branch and smack and bounce and then whap yourself in the head like a Latvian whore in a Murphy bed?
andreavis
December 8th, 2006 at 1:39 pm [Reply]

#49: AppleGirl, I am crossing myself, knocking on wood, and throwing salt over my shoulder, because if your FOOB scenario comes to pass, I will surely die from the eyeball-searing horror. Ptuh! ptuh! I’m spitting on the ground and walking in a circle 3 times, for good measure. Curse you, snowy Canadian plains! You must not keep Paul from his New Year’s booty call!
TuffyTheTuna
December 8th, 2006 at 1:46 pm [Reply]

Elrod’s highly-trained, personalized golfball-retrieving squirrel fetches an errant and ill-advised 5-wood shot and heads back to the fairway, only to be startled by a speeding jeep.
“Drop another, Jack.”
“Damn it! Where the hell is that (Margo)ing squirrel?!!
SmartPeopleOnIce
December 8th, 2006 at 2:00 pm [Reply]

In the spirit of metapost, I say y’all owes it to yourselfs to clicky over to wonkette and check out Josh’s latest post there.

That being said, however, beware of the cryptic wonkette adverts. it took me awhile to figure out that “staying on the rez” was in fact NOT a reference to birth control.
Ben
December 8th, 2006 at 2:05 pm [Reply]

Looks like Mr. Black is married to Pearl Forrester from MST3K.
Dingo
December 8th, 2006 at 2:10 pm [Reply]

In a sleepy Ontario town, the snows of Christmas fall. A young woman stares out the window into the distance. Her boyfriend, a rugged Canadian police officer from the Great White North, had phoned her just days before to say that his transfer had come, that he would be joining her in the happy place of childhood wishes and dreams to begin a life together, and that he would be able to share with her the joy of watching the niece and nephew open their gifts on the morning of their Savior’s birth. He was supposed to arrive hours ago. The spiral cut ham sat cold on the dining room table. The cranberry sauce, once perfectly adhering to the shape of the can from whence it came, had unmolded.

Every so often a car would begin down the street and Elizabeth’s heart would race. Could this be him? Could it be Paul? But alas, the car would continue past her parents’ home and she would again feel obliged to take a sip of spiced wine. The liquor did not intoxicate her; in fact, it made her thoughts clearer. This was to be the start of a new life for her â€” a life as a woman, no longer a child.

Her cat slowly circled Elizabeth’s legs, weaving a cradle of despair between them.

Mother and father had gone to bed. Her younger sister, April, had sat with her for awhile, silently, in full contemplation of what was meant by the passing minutes of Paul’s lack of arrival. Finally, April had hugged her older sister and went off to her room, asking her to rouse her when Paul was there.

But the hours crept on like a Kevin Costner movie, and with each chime of the clock the queasiness in Elizabeth’s stomach grew stronger. A car hurriedly turned onto the street and came to a stop in front of the house. With the decorations in the yard and her father’s train lit like Danny Devito on The View, she couldn’t see the shape or colour of the vehicle. She heard a car door slam shut.

Elizabeth raced to the entrance. Turning on the front porch light as she opened the door, it was not Paul standing before her. It was Anthony.

Anthony held his hat in his hands. His face belied his years. This was not the young carefree man she knew but a ghostly visage. He was ashen and bleary-eyed. As he approached, the aroma of Johnny Walker Black permeated the brisk night air.

“Elizabeth,” he said, “there’s been an accident.”

“An accident? What kind of accident?”

Anthony curled the brim of his hat in his hands. “You know that old mining road just north of town? The one without the guard rail?”

“Yes. What about it?”

“It’s the road that connects us to the north. To Mtigwaki.” As the village name emerged from his mouth, the cloud of condensation in the cold formed a vision for her of the days spent teaching First Nation youth on the tundra. “The snow falling tonight… it covered black ice. There was a car. The skid marks show he was travelling to get somewhere fast. The driver… didn’t make it.”

Elizabeth bit her lower lip. It was a family trait from when her grandfather dreamed of prime rib during the War. “The driver? Who…?”

“Oh, sweet dear Elizabeth. Gordon and I were called out with the tow truck. The driver… the driver was Paul. Darling, Paul is dead.”

“Paul McCartney? Yeah, yeah, we all heard that. It wasn’t true. What are you telling me?”

Anthony swung his arm through the chilly night air and landed his hand smartly on Elizabeth’s cheek. “Elizabeth, your boyfriend! Your boyfriend, Paul, is dead! His body was found at the bottom of the mining road.”

Elizabeth stood there, silently, for the longest time. Not a long time as in Rumsfeld deciding to resign but a long time as in waiting for a tea kettle to whistle but you didn’t remember that you picked up the wrong tea kettle the one that was broken and the whistler doesn’t work and you know that the tea is boiling but nothing is happening and finally you go over to the kettle to check on it and as you pass your hand over the top to grab the handle you get a nasty burn from the steam. Tears welled in her eyes.

Anthony leaned forward and took her hands in his. They stood there, in the doorway, with the porch light on, letting the heat of the house escape and the Ontario chill in. Elizabeth looked up at the man standing before her, the man brave enough to tell her that the man she thought she was meant to love was gone.

“Anthony,” she said, “did you just call me ‘Darling’?”
insolenttomato
December 8th, 2006 at 2:11 pm [Reply]

#74: Ben, you’re right! It looks like the ‘bots FINALLY drove her to drink!
srah
December 8th, 2006 at 2:30 pm [Reply]

#75 for COTW, for length if not for the Bulwer-Lytton-ness of it all.
Charlotte
December 8th, 2006 at 2:31 pm [Reply]

#52 – to add
Luann is inside the building when it catches fire and who should save her . . . the ghost?
That is my best – OR – Alan will save her and she will believe it was the ghost.
Charlotte
December 8th, 2006 at 2:32 pm [Reply]

bet bet bet NOT best

errrggghhhh
TB Tabby
December 8th, 2006 at 2:34 pm [Reply]

#77: I’m glad I’m not the only one who thought of Bulwer-Lytton.
MonkeyHawk
December 8th, 2006 at 2:34 pm [Reply]

#75 — Dingo:

“the hours crept on like a Kevin Costner movie.”

Simile of the week!
hogenmogen
December 8th, 2006 at 3:08 pm [Reply]

Foob: All that business about Granthony being around when Liz needed him, and Paul being off doing his job and whatever – let’s all remember that Granthony never visited Liz in Mtwacky. So, Blandthony is great, so long as he doesn’t have to go too far out of his way.

I also harbor the resentment at the way Liz finally got rid of helicopter boy was that she had him pick her up from Mtwacky and drop her off at Paul’s hometown so the two suitors could meet. Helicopter boy saw Liz openly french kissing Dudley Doowright and Dudley getting busy with his grabass fetish. Heli-boy thinks “For this I flew 1600 miles out of my way. You’re welcome, Lizardbreath.”

So, whaddaya say officer Doo-wright decides that the way to ditch Lizard is to show up at the Patterson estate with his new date. Yeah, that would make for an interesting, if not wholly uncomfortable Christmas dinner.

What would be a complete let down is if Doo-wright comes, and no real confrontation takes place between him and the mustached one, but Doo-wright sees Lizard and Granthony interact. This epic triangle will fizzle like “I see how much you really care about Anthony. Go to him now. I’ll get my transfer cancelled. Good bye Liz.”
Lizard (thinks): I feel like my life was just cancelled.
Lynn Johnson: I spent a year and a half thinking up that climactic punch line. It’s hilarious, right?
My wife the big FBOFW fan: That’s so sad, but yet funny. Sob! Ha! Sob! Ha!
Me: In vintage Old Testament rage I shall rent my garments in tatters at the contemptous insult this comic has dealt all of humankind!
My wife: Don’t get so worked up, that’s just an old t-shirt and your socks had holes in them anyway.
Molly Bear: I don’t understand your hostility.
hogenmogen
December 8th, 2006 at 3:17 pm [Reply]

Not specifically about comics, but there was much ado about Diana Rigg…

I haven’t heard anything on the news about it, but John Lennon was shot like 26 years ago today or yesterday. I think it was around 12:30 AM, so the news gets a little fuzzy. I’ve read articles about the Pearl Harbor anniversary. I even read about Jim Morrison’s birthday. A few years ago I read about Worm Day, which is if you took the history of the world and condensed it into one year, worms would have evolved on December 8. But even Tinsley didn’t do a “John Lennon was killed – Good riddance, pinko!”

Well, happy Worm Day everyone!
Gadge Cubic, Mole Preener
December 8th, 2006 at 3:27 pm [Reply]

#75 Dingo: Brilliant. I especially loved “Paul McCartney?”
SmartPeopleOnIce
December 8th, 2006 at 3:37 pm [Reply]

HogenMogen – there is a slightly different cool example in Sagan’s Demon-Haunted World where he compresses the age of the universe into one year. I don’t remember where worms show up on that scale, but dinosaurs get clobbered around Christmas, and humans don’t show up until New Year’s eve…

Speaking of worms… Careful rocking the boat there Tinsley. Your republican handlers might stop giving kick-backs to newpapers to run your f’ing strip.
Poteet
December 8th, 2006 at 3:57 pm [Reply]

#75 — Ahh, the sensation of laughing really hard while occasionally grimacing at a particularly apt and yet painful simile. Thanks, Dingo, a true masterpiece.

And per #70, could you maybe, um, discuss another bear, perhaps one named, um, Millie? That way I could enjoy your flair for language without feeling guilty for laughing at Molly, The Best Bear In The World.
Poteet
December 8th, 2006 at 3:59 pm [Reply]

JP — I think that blonde reporter looks like a combination of the young Susan Hampshire (Fleur in the original FORSYTE SAGA) and Lalla Ward, a.k.a. Romana II in DOCTOR WHO. With a touch of Hooters thrown in.
Justafoob
December 8th, 2006 at 3:59 pm [Reply]

You know, Dingo #75, you could really do something with your writing talent.

Did you ever think about writing a novel about a young girl in the wilds of Saskatchewan?
MossMoses
December 8th, 2006 at 4:05 pm [Reply]

Josh, what’s the proper method for curmudgeonites to submit pictures of themselves wearing your comics swag? I can’t find your email address anywhere on this webpage…
Adam de Quebec
December 8th, 2006 at 4:13 pm [Reply]

If June’s “question” as to how jail-bait Niki intends to “repay” her $150 was not meant as the world’s clearest example of sexual propositioning, then it proves once and for all that Woody Wilson died some time ago, and that his writing duties are now performed by a steely, cold, text-generating machine, completely devoid of any human emotion or concept of innuendo.
Sundance
December 8th, 2006 at 4:17 pm [Reply]

So how long is a JP day anyway! I, having no life, checked and it’s been three days in JP time since Randy broke off the engagement to Mimi. Abbie, Ned and Raju haven’t even left the house yet. Hell, April just arrived at the CIA today! So, fat election opponent is going to out Randy cause he’s been a single guy for three days! Good luck with that one. We’ll find out tomorrow……or in May.
johncomic
December 8th, 2006 at 4:19 pm [Reply]

83 hogenmogen: if it’s any consolation, our local radio was announcing Lennon Memorial Day and playing his music first thing this morning…
Josh
December 8th, 2006 at 4:19 pm [Reply]

MossMoses-

Click the “E-mail Josh” link in the left-hand nav bar.

Josh
Pendragon
December 8th, 2006 at 4:48 pm [Reply]

Dingo: Congratulations and thank you for your Unbearable Bulwer-Lyttonness of Being.
Pelagius
December 8th, 2006 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

Foxtrot: The comics page is about to get a little less funny. Bill Amend is quitting … well, scaling back to dailies.
Concerned Citizen
December 8th, 2006 at 5:11 pm [Reply]

83 – Jeez, it was 26 years ago. I’ll listen to Happy Xmas (War is Over) and unfortunately we still have yet to Give Peace A Chance.

Sorry, after all of this time I still get sappily sentimental.
MyGoodName
December 8th, 2006 at 5:38 pm [Reply]

GT: “Sean Pettibone’s been on the internet” OK, but that really doesn’t explain all the pamphlets there, Bill.

MW: Ella has escaped her mortal coil and is now one with the force. Dent was warned: strike her down and she’ll become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.

RMMD: Is June soliciting sex from a starfish? Or just trying to get in on the meth market? Either way, I like where this is going.
Plunk Your Magic Twanger
December 8th, 2006 at 6:08 pm [Reply]

#35 hogenmogen: No fucking way! When I was a kid my grandmother wanted me to call her “Mimi.” And the parent who wasn’t her kid was always irritated by it. I wonder if it could be the same person. Is she 128 years old and dead?
DrBear
December 8th, 2006 at 6:24 pm [Reply]

Just FYI: The San Antonio paper pulled B.C. because of the following line: He drew a caveman looking up “infamy” in “Wiley’s dictionary” with this definition following: “A word seldom used after Toyota sales topped 2 million.”

Tomorrow: A salute to General Patton!
edgeways
December 8th, 2006 at 6:28 pm [Reply]

50:1 its breakup season in the fooberverse
TB Tabby
December 8th, 2006 at 6:31 pm [Reply]

#95: First off, we knew about that already. Second, take a closer look at the story. Foxtrol isn’t going away completely, it’s just moving to a Sonday-only format.
Nyssa23
December 8th, 2006 at 6:51 pm [Reply]

#99 – Gee whiz, I was glad to read about my conservative hometown (where I haven’t lived in ages) taking a stand against Hart’s racism–until I got to the part where there’s a new Toyota factory there. *sigh* Oh well.
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 8th, 2006 at 7:15 pm [Reply]

95 Thinking about Bill Amend scaling back, it caused me to wonder how many strips have had a long run without going stale?

After all, you create a set of characters and situations, and there are only so many things you can do with them. Far Side, Bloom County and Calvin and Hobbes ended because their authors felt they couldn’t keep up the standard.

Pogo was one, but it was based largely on current events. Same with Doonesbury, which also has had character development over the years. Peanuts was good for quite a long time, mostly by bringing in new characters.

You would think the plot-driven strips like RMMD, JP or A3-G would have the best shot at it, because you could bring in new ideas at any time. But they all move at an infernally slow pace, and the attempts at cultural relevancy are typically dated or off the mark.

Krazy Kat ran for 28 years. Does anyone have any other examples of comics that stayed good over many decades?
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 8th, 2006 at 7:19 pm [Reply]

By the way, while going through Toonpedia I discovered the interesting fact that Bill Hoest, the creator of The Lockhorns died in 1988, and the strip has been written by his wife Bunny ever since.
kingkong
December 8th, 2006 at 7:21 pm [Reply]

What’s with the Beaver Kid’s teeth in MT?

Those are wild.
Old Fogeyette
December 8th, 2006 at 7:47 pm [Reply]

#75: Dingo, I am in awe. I too especially liked the Kevin Costner simile.
Luna
December 8th, 2006 at 7:55 pm [Reply]

#75 Dingo– Best line:

“Anthony swung his arm through the chilly night air and landed his hand smartly on Elizabethâ€™s cheek.”

Hahahahahahahaha!
Citric
December 8th, 2006 at 8:04 pm [Reply]

BC – No, you know you’re completely batshit insane when the dog says that. Or in Mark Trail.
Summerhouse
December 8th, 2006 at 8:10 pm [Reply]

OK, you math and physics types – observe the video of the bear-who-isn’t-Molly, using Dingo’s link in post #70, or however you want to see it. The question: Is Not-Molly Bear worse off for having taken the huge bounce on the trampoline before hitting the ground, than if she’d just fallen directly from the tree? Why/ Why Not? I know one thing for sure, I hope nobody calls these genuises to hekp me the day I go up a tree and won’t come down. (And that day is coming.)
Mike P? Mikel? I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE!
December 8th, 2006 at 8:37 pm [Reply]

I like the word Morganic. It should be included in the next edition of Webster’s Dictionary.
mattt
December 8th, 2006 at 8:59 pm [Reply]

“The question: Is Not-Molly Bear worse off for having taken the huge bounce on the trampoline before hitting the ground, than if sheâ€™d just fallen directly from the tree?”
I haven’t seen that vid in a while, but unless the bear bounces higher than he was in the tree–which it doesn’t–than, no. During the bounce, once the bear reached the top of the bounce, then it’s pretty much like starting the fall over from the top of the bounce. If the top of the bounce is lower than the original height in the tree, then the bear is falling a shorter distance.

Of course, bounces can introduce all sorts of weird turning and things which can complicate matters, landing at weird angles and the like.
Len
December 8th, 2006 at 9:28 pm [Reply]

Curmudgeons! I clicked on the ad for Les McClaine’s on-line comic strip, “Jonnie Crossbones.” I like it a lot. Is it my imagination, or does it owe a lot of inspiration to Herge’s “Tin-Tin” series? It even seems to have the feel of a European strip.

And is a reason ever given for Jonnie being drawn all the time wearing a black body stocking with a stylized skeleton painted/ embroidered on it? Nobody ever says, “Why is that kid dressed like a skeleton,” so it must be symbolic. But (as Mel Brooks’ “The Critic” would ask) — Symbolic of WHAT?!
Len
December 8th, 2006 at 9:33 pm [Reply]

Oh, and a week late (and a dollar short!) I wanted to doff my hat in memory of the recent passing of comics artist Dave Cockrum, who designed many of the wonderful costumes on the X-Men (not to mention the Legion of Super-Heroes!).
gh
December 8th, 2006 at 9:42 pm [Reply]

#37 Concerned Citizen

I honestly don’t remember her topless. Perhaps I blacked out.
gh
December 8th, 2006 at 9:48 pm [Reply]

#46 AppleGirl

MW — What about Dr. Jeff? What about [Margo]ing Mary?? She’s been gone for over a week. Not even she needs that long to powder her nose. I think she and her posse went on a gambling cruise to nowhere and left the B team in charge.

MT — Well, not to give it away, but the gernormous child sorta has . . .beaver teeth. We’re checking to see if he’s a Plugger. We’ll get back to you.
gh
December 8th, 2006 at 9:54 pm [Reply]

#55 Old Fogeyette

Thaknk you! I read F Minus once when someone linked to a good one a few weeks ago, but every time I went back it was nothing. I gave up.
Doug Puthoff
December 8th, 2006 at 9:58 pm [Reply]

12-8–Curtis: I’m hoping the ACLU triest to stop the Christmas play. It would be the most interesting thing that’s ever happened in that strip. Who am I kidding? Today’s strip will probably be the last we hear about it, LIke Barriy’s imaginary buddy Oogie.

Information about the Ten Commandments can be found on the Internet.

B.C.: What I admire most about Charles Schulz #515: Schulz never had a “Peanuts” strip deal with disgusting body functions.

GF–I hope somebody at the State Department declare McManx as an undesirable alien.

Garfield–Does anybody below the age of 40 know what X-rary Specs were?

Beetle Bailey: Covert Squad? They look like they should be at a college football game halftime show.

MF: Never happen, Mallard. Even now, Congressional Democrats are coveting rich people’s money.
gh
December 8th, 2006 at 10:02 pm [Reply]

#70 Dingo

You made a funny. My shirt sleeve’s wet from wiping my eyes. Lemme scroll back.
gh
December 8th, 2006 at 10:09 pm [Reply]

#75

Damn it, Dingo! Now my other sleeve is completely soaked!
macb
December 8th, 2006 at 10:27 pm [Reply]

Re: John Lennon. He was shot about 9 p.m. EST Monday night, 12/8/80, as he and Yoko Ono returned from a recording studio in Midtown Manhattan to their apt. at the Dakota (W. 72nd St. and CPW). Howard Cosell interrupted coverage of the MNF game on ABC to make the announcement. Mark David Chapman (may his name be forever cursed) was the culprit.
Summerhouse
December 9th, 2006 at 12:00 am [Reply]

#111 Matt – Thanks, Matt. That’s what my impaired left brain was trying to get to. She would have fallen further from the tree, but might have landed on her butt or back instead of her poor Not-Molly face.
camster
December 9th, 2006 at 12:53 am [Reply]

RMMD 9/12– When June says her garage needs painting, I think we all know what she’s talking about. Adios, Rex: Hola, Niki.
Dub Not Dubya
December 9th, 2006 at 1:34 am [Reply]

121: Either that or Niki is about to become Lucky Pierre.
Jason
December 9th, 2006 at 2:03 am [Reply]

JP PREDICTION:

In judge parker, it is going to come out that Sam leaked the info about Celeste going to rehab to the media, and then Randy Parker will get all self-righteous on him.
Mibbitmaker
December 9th, 2006 at 2:33 am [Reply]

12/9:

FOOB: I know: cheap pun, Apes more fun to mock, etc; but, dammit, Liz is mock-heaven, too… so I say good for April! Really, Lizard, why are you back at home? (rhetorical question)

FC: Gruesome stuff as a pet bear, as it were, almost has its brains dropping out from a ghastly wound, while Mamma FC is lurking mysteriously in the background. What’s really going on? Well, let’s just say that Molly (aka: Teddy) doesn’t understand Thel’s hostility.

SM: So Peter will save the day and not get any sex for the rest of the year (MW time) in a single move. Good work, Petey!

FW: “How do you feel about really really desperate guys?”

A3G: The Return of the World Reknown! She doesn’t need a library, she needs Ghostbusters!

Monty: YAY for Coral Karl Rectangle Pants! All they need now is a horny manatee! (Conan O’Brien fans know what I mean…)
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 9th, 2006 at 3:21 am [Reply]

TDIET–She’s going to stop her head bobbling when she sees that Korla Pandit is in the waiting room. I’m assuming that must be a turban, because I don’t believe that health care has quite deteriorated to the point where they do brain surgery on an out-patient basis.
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 9th, 2006 at 3:25 am [Reply]

Zippy is amusing today. It’s also fun to imagine the results if Garfield were drawn by Bill Griffith.
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 9th, 2006 at 3:37 am [Reply]

I haven’t been following Brenda Starr, but there seems to be an “Aldo in reverse” story going on there.
Bobdog
December 9th, 2006 at 5:28 am [Reply]

DM – Apparently the only people on Dennis’ Christmas list are the crazy cat lady from Simpsons and former Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist.
Bobdog
December 9th, 2006 at 5:50 am [Reply]

MT – Maybe I missed a turn, but I don’t recall Theodore being hit by a car (and really, given our beaver friends travails to date, I can’t imagine Jack Elrod would spare us the trauma of this incident), so Mark’s diagnostic skills are somewhat suspect — unless Mark and Rusty hit him as they stopped to investigate the injured animal — then I guess the evidence would be more conclusive.

Rusty’s remarkable powers to morph from an adult male to an adolescent and back suprisingly go unnoticed by Mark. Maybe Mark suffers from some variation on Granthony’s FOOB vision — only instead of seeing Rusty all tarted up, as Granthony sees Liz, Mark sees Rusty as the little boy he once was. Then again, maybe to Mark, that is tarted up. That would also explain the cub scout uniform.
Bobdog
December 9th, 2006 at 6:12 am [Reply]

Foob — Panel 2 provides a good contrast between the stylings of Lynn Johnston — on the right we have her vision of beauty — the angular “Michelle Pfeiffer” style nose, long flowing hair and the bee stung lips. On the left we have what that vision of beauty is destined to become — a goddamn muppet with no eye balls.
Gatormom
December 9th, 2006 at 6:13 am [Reply]

OK, so Liz wants privacy, right? Hello? Lock the door? Man, she’s uptight.
ltrftp(not so first time)
December 9th, 2006 at 9:25 am [Reply]

109 – That is a dead bear being pushed out of a tree.

Re BC, c’mon, you have to be looking to be offended by the “infamy” strip.
Dingo
December 9th, 2006 at 9:33 am [Reply]

Mar’ Worth: Ian’s back and so is the green jacket! Oh, kaloo kalay! He’s looking spritely, too. It seems the sex holiday he and Toeby took over the past few weeks of comic’s time has been good to him. I wonder what Toeby will look like. Based on Ian, I’m predicting she’ll look like an aging French whore or Mitterand in a skirt.

Shame on the creators of the strip for leaving Mary out of the frame when she verbally bitchslapped Ella. Yes, Mary, a 90-year-old woman is running a biz-nez out of her condo. Would you prefer she hold three-card Monte on the streetcorner near the women’s shelter? Turn tricks at the poolhouse? Up and die, leaving you Queen of Biddydom? Knowing you, the up and dying part would be unsatisfying.

For Mary Worth, success has the taste of fresh blood on pink, puckered lips.
ltrftp(not so first time)
December 9th, 2006 at 9:33 am [Reply]

132 – Or a tranked one.
Ned Ryerson
December 9th, 2006 at 9:34 am [Reply]

Somewhere, Bill the Cat mourns the passing of Jeane Kirkpatrick.
Ellie M.
December 9th, 2006 at 10:24 am [Reply]

FOOB: “You two are both old enough to work this out on your own.”

All right then, April. Pistols at dawn.
Randy S
December 9th, 2006 at 10:27 am [Reply]

133: “Shame on the creators of the strip for leaving Mary out of the frame when she verbally bitchslapped Ella.”

I don’t think that was Mary, actually. (Although I did get that impression at first)
I think that was probably Mr. Dent who came back to seek his revenge on Ella.
Old Fogeyette
December 9th, 2006 at 10:30 am [Reply]

I wonder if His Popeness ever has the feeling he is losing control of his blog?
ltrftp(not so first time)
December 9th, 2006 at 10:40 am [Reply]

135 – Ned, when you are right, you right!

Darn, I just stepped in a puddle.

Cold, too.
ltrftp(not so first time)
December 9th, 2006 at 10:42 am [Reply]

Fyi, there are 17,100 google results for “morganic”
Red Greenback
December 9th, 2006 at 11:03 am [Reply]

RMMD: “My garage needs painting”…Lord knows, Rex won’t do it.
Old Fogeyette
December 9th, 2006 at 11:14 am [Reply]

Well, I just got around to reading most of today’s comics, and I am a bit flummoxed:

RMMD: Did Nikki’s jaw miraculously heal itself?

MT: How can a scratched leg lead Mark to assume Theodore has a broken foot? (But hooray that he’s taking care of Theodore. Now if he can just refrain from leaving our beloved beaver alone in the jeep. And I realize that “beloved beaver” is perhaps not the best phrasing here.)

JP: I’m so confused. What happened to Abbey and Neddy? What’s Raju up to? And Sophie? It’s like three or four strips in one, all of them very slow-moving and boring.
queek
December 9th, 2006 at 11:26 am [Reply]

todays Cow and Boy was highly amusing.

http://www.comics.com/comics/cowandboy/index.html
ltrftp(not so first time)
December 9th, 2006 at 11:50 am [Reply]

Queek
I disagree.
Sheilagh
December 9th, 2006 at 11:53 am [Reply]

FOOB: This makes me TIRED. Yo, Liz, if you move back home to the parental abode, yeah, you automatically get sucked into acting like an adolescent again. THAT’S WHY GROWN-UPS WOULD RATHER EAT RUSTY NAILS THAN MOVE BACK. Duh.

#142, Old Fogeyette — good point! That does seem rather harsh, making someone do a ton of manual labor with an untreated broken jaw making them miserable the whole time. Who does ol’ June think she is? Think she’ll relent when she finds out the kid’s just been orphaned TOO?

MW: I don’t think that’s Mary out-of-frame. Dent seems like a good guess…
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
December 9th, 2006 at 12:10 pm [Reply]

Today, Dennis continues to be not much of a menace.

Paraphrases of some of this week’s comics:

Dec. 8: “Visual reminders of Christmas’s proximity inspire feelings of benevolence.”

Dec. 7: “Being aware of the feelings of others, I observe my neighbour is not in his most positive frame of mind today.”

Dec. 5: “It is good to respect other forms of life, and to ponder what existence would be like from their standpoint.”

Today: “I wish I could obtain a kitten as a gift for each person I care about in this world.”
gh
December 9th, 2006 at 12:29 pm [Reply]

I got trapped in Josh’s spam filter last night. I feel like a piece of lint. Just want to see if it’s catch and release.

*slinks back in (hopefully)*
yggdrasil
December 9th, 2006 at 12:34 pm [Reply]

Oh man, I thought I was going nuts. April *blinks* in the last panel of FOOB. Actually blinks. It’s a GIF. I’ve still got chills.
Gadge Cubic, Mole Preener
December 9th, 2006 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

Josh – There should be some sort of program that detects certain words or combinations of words in comments – like, say, “blink*” + “FOOB” (or any character name) – that causes the screen to say “we know, we know…” Or maybe a t-shirt with the top ten most repeated comments…

Anyway, to those who noticed blinking FOOBs: no, you’re not insane (at least except insofar as visiting fborfw.com calls your sanity into question); yes, the strips at that site are animated GIFs that sometimes have characters inanely blinking, or gesturing, or flipping off the audience.

This is a public service announcement (with GUITAR!)
Gatormom
December 9th, 2006 at 12:49 pm [Reply]

FOOB:
OHMYGOD. It just occurred to me.
You don’t think Liz will get irritated and move out? That Granthony might offer her a room at his house, “just as old friends, of course”…aaaack the thought is too unbearable.
mumbles
December 9th, 2006 at 1:09 pm [Reply]

(DT)GT: “The world’s most optimistic amputee”….hmm. I’d suggest putting this on a t-shirt, but I think even the smuggest Lower East Side hipster would be uncomfortable with the irony.

It certainly is perhaps one of the most awkward statement in the comic strips this year, in the “not spoken by Aldo” category.
Son of Slam
December 9th, 2006 at 1:11 pm [Reply]

#145 – I am temporarily living with my folks after a rapid job change has caused me to leave my wife and kids in another city until the house sells.

Man, rusty nails would have been better.
Uncle Lumpy
December 9th, 2006 at 1:12 pm [Reply]

#145 Gatormom -

Yeah, Granthony’s got a place in his basement that would be just right for Liz.
Dingo
December 9th, 2006 at 1:16 pm [Reply]

Wow. GC,MP and I both play guitar. Is it kismet or WHAT?
johncomic
December 9th, 2006 at 1:24 pm [Reply]

TDIET: the patient lady, is, like, surprised by the backlog of other patients at the doctor’s office. Surprised that she isn’t going to get in spot on the minute of her appt.

Apparently the first time she’s ever gone to see a doctor in her life. [Take better care of yourselves than this twit, kids.]

What next, Scaduto? “Someone emits a frappy sound… and next thing ya know, the room smells bad!” Oh the stunning surprise! Baw! Awk-k!
Brian
December 9th, 2006 at 1:35 pm [Reply]

FOOB: “You two are both old enough to work this out on your own.” Translation– “Yes, Liz, don’t you realize we only interfere when it comes to minor things like your love life and future, which allows us to be both maddeningly smug, and to create a feeling of passive-agressive resentment that will quietly haunt you for the rest of your life? Now, if you’ll excuse us, we have to find some strangers to feel morally superior to.”
Len
December 9th, 2006 at 1:48 pm [Reply]

Tex Avery is ALIVE!

(Or his shtick is…)

http://www.gocomics.com/inkpen/2006/12/08/
Len
December 9th, 2006 at 1:53 pm [Reply]

#139 — Cow and Boy:

Cow’s got scarves! And ear-muffs!

When cow’s are in frigid weather, do their udders get hard?

Inquiring minds want to know.
Poteet
December 9th, 2006 at 2:04 pm [Reply]

#138 — Fogeyette, not only did Niki’s jaw heal like magic, but he has the remarkable ability to randomly appear to be at least eighteen when he’s only thirteen. He may not even NEED a fake ID in a few years. If he lives that long, with Eightball gunning for him.

As for JP, you are so right, and I’ll whine yet again that I WANNA GO TO PARIS!!! I WANNA GO TO PARIS!!! Geez, Neddy and Abbey are having all the fun and we’re stuck here watching the slowest campaign in history and hoping that a drunk will throw up.
J.S.
December 9th, 2006 at 2:11 pm [Reply]

So Mark Trail now has a kid, a bear, and a beaver in his magical hover-jeep. Why not just throw a box of razor blades and a few grenades into the mix? Because a beaver isn’t a sweet and cuddly animal. No, it’s a mess of razor-sharp claws and teeth, with a disposition to match. Just wait until the wounded beaver starts lashing out at Molly in the back of the car! Then we’ll see some fast-paced Mark Trail excitement.

Or not.
queek
December 9th, 2006 at 2:12 pm [Reply]

140: obviously a pirate.
BewaretheCreeper
December 9th, 2006 at 2:27 pm [Reply]

BB “I wonder when we lost our spark?” Correct answer: We didn’t, do you want it on your tummy or your rack, dear?

9CL If this makes me laugh any more then I’m going to need my rib cage stitched.

A3G Luann who ya gonna call? I wonder if Bill Murray and Harold Ramis are still in the building.

Curtis Going hardcore with a Mom tattoo is just going to get Derrick and Onion to punch you much harder.

FOBOW Lizardbreath you cant beat the crap out of your sister Apwil? How about hiring some special ed kids from your school to do it? Some might even do it for free.

Gil Thorp Ya gotta love this guy one leg and all.
Sniff.

Luann: Gunther, you knew when Rosa discovered the REAL men of the school you were going to be relegated back to Luann status.

SF But TED you did get the sportsmanship trophy and that’s what counts.

PC Anne Coulterism, An armed society is a polite society.

Kudzu Oh to be in the mind of a man who thinks like a woman.
Summerhouse
December 9th, 2006 at 2:28 pm [Reply]

Clearly, the folks in Phantom chose their president for his magnificent thighs specifically, and his ability to look great in a lycra tuxedo, generally. See? This is what you get when you vote *for* things you belive in instead of *against* things you don’t believe in. I’m talking to you, America.
TB Tabby
December 9th, 2006 at 2:30 pm [Reply]

MF: I can actually get behind that one. Set it to work over an internet connection and I’m sold.

“Flip the giant enemy crab for MASS–” *ZAP*

“It’s over NINE THOUSA–” *ZAP*

“LEROOOOOOOOOOOY JENK–” *ZAP*

It would make the GameFAQs forum a much less annoying place.
Summerhouse
December 9th, 2006 at 2:57 pm [Reply]

If you will refer to both Judge Parker and Gil Thorp for 12/9 you will see – CELESTE IS A SURGEON! Which is where all the money comes from for hubby’s campaign. Oh my God- drunk, and without her glasses, she unnecessarily amputatesd Bill Ritter’s leg. Bill doesn’t care, though, because it brings Stormy’s love for him to the forefront. He’s waited a long time for Stormy to place his hand on his …blanket.
TB Tabby
December 9th, 2006 at 3:30 pm [Reply]

Garfield: So, he bit the gingerbread man’s head off because it was “too cute to live,” huh? In that case, he should pay a visit to Family Circus.
edgeways
December 9th, 2006 at 4:03 pm [Reply]

You know, it seems like so many of GT story lines start out and seem to be so obviously about… er, gay love, but then quickly devolve into some banal story about limb removal or race relations or other tedious stuff, how can such a gay seeming town completely avoid the gay?

(incidentaly, I may have found Milford, NW-ish Iowa has a small town named this, and cripes, driving through it reminds me of the strip.)
Old Fogeyette
December 9th, 2006 at 4:14 pm [Reply]

144: Gadge Cubic, Mole Preener–I can’t stand it anymore. I checked out your blogs but could not find a private address to email you. Please, please, share the origin of your nom de blog. It just keeps going through my mind, like thoughts of Molly.

154: Poteet–I don’t want to see a drunk throw up even in the comics. I’ve seen enough drunks throw up in real life. I want to see her start swearing a blue streak at the other politicians, the press, and her no good husband.
Smurfette
December 9th, 2006 at 5:29 pm [Reply]

Today’s A3G would be appreciated much better while stoned. Not that I condone that, mind yoo…
Heckler123
December 9th, 2006 at 5:41 pm [Reply]

#163, Old Fogeyette – Actually, vomit can provide comic relief, as long as you’re upwind and out of the splash zone. I was once at a concert at which a kid about 13 or 14 puked all over the floor, passed out, and was carried out by his friends. This created an open space near the stage; since the nearby people blocked an easy view of the floor, many people rushed over to what they thought was a prime viewing area. There was much amusing skidding in the blown chow, and one guy fell flat on his back in it. Aah, good times…….
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 9th, 2006 at 5:44 pm [Reply]

It may be hard to believe, but BC is even less funny in Spanish.

Since the “humor” depends on a pun that only makes sense in English, translating the punchline into Spanish is going to leave the audience, if there is one, completely mystified.
The Photocopiest
December 9th, 2006 at 5:58 pm [Reply]

#138: If Nikki’s jaw is healed, it’s about to get broken again by (ahem) “painting the garage.” With long, slow, up-and-down strokes.
yellojkt
December 9th, 2006 at 6:06 pm [Reply]

(Inspired by Gadge)

This is a comics service announcement WITH GUITAR

Know your cliches. All three of them

First: Foobs blink. A lot. Cats wag tails and shadows walk in the background.

Second: 9 Chickweed Lane is Artsy. Between dancers in silhouette and cats bending cartoon frames, McEldowney gets to go for days without an actual joke.

Third: Aldo looks like….nevermind, dead issue.

In some quarters it has been suggested that three is not enough. In that case:

Johnny Hart is a narrow-minded bat guano insane religious bigot.

Mallard Filllmore says stupid reactionary things. He sometimes gets delusions he is Johnny Hart.

Lots and lots of cartoons are drawn by dead people. They work for less.

Feel free to add to this list. Or start a FAC (Frequently Announced Comments)
Pinback65
December 9th, 2006 at 6:33 pm [Reply]

168–Yeah, but the main thing to say about Johnny Hart isn’t that he’s narrow-minded and insane, but that his strip seems to be drawn by somebody who has literally lost his mind, like later appearances by Groucho Marx, telling long, rambling stories that had no point or punchline, but you hoped they’d pay off somehow.

Actually, that doesn’t work at all, since Groucho had, after all, been funny once. So Johnny Hart would be like El Brendel if he’d had a stroke–annoyingly unfunny in the first place, then annoying, unfunny and incoherent.

Man, I hate BC.
Harry Paratestes
December 9th, 2006 at 6:49 pm [Reply]

Celeste is grotesquely gorgeous in Sunday’s strip, her flews glistening with chicken fat and her dockworker’s voice deafening the crowd as she threatens to ram the reporter’s microphone right down her throat. Only one thing could improve the strip: Having Celeste shout instead Frank Zappa’s immortal verse:”I’m gonna ram it, ram it, ram it, ram it up your poopchute! CORNHOLE!”
Harry Paratestes
December 9th, 2006 at 6:55 pm [Reply]

JP: I think that Randy’s hot secretary / CIA recruit had a hand in all this.
majolo
December 9th, 2006 at 7:03 pm [Reply]

Yeah, what is the deal with BC today? I’m having trouble fathoming the connection, other than that they are plants associated with people, maybe? Would an equally good punchline be, “No, but I have a begonia that was sat on by Tiny Tim”? (Incidentally, I did have one of those rosemary Christmas trees one year. It smelled nice.)
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
December 9th, 2006 at 7:06 pm [Reply]

On the topic of doubting Johnny Hart’s sanity — any theories about what the “joke” is in today’s strip?

I’ve given it my best shot, and what I’ve come up with is this: You see, not only are they out of Christmas trees, but they are so out of Christmas trees that they don’t even have any plants that are suggestive of winter or snow. In fact, the only plants they have left are as far away from winter-themed as possible, in that they are suggestive of hotness and fire.

(Note: Red Adair was somebody renowned for fighting oil fires. I didn’t know this until I looked it up after reading the strip. Mr. Adair was born in 1915 and is now deceased.)
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
December 9th, 2006 at 7:06 pm [Reply]

majolo and i were having similar thoughts while i was composing my post…
Uncle Lumpy
December 9th, 2006 at 7:26 pm [Reply]

John Wayne played “Chance Buckman”, the Red Adair character, in Hellfighters. Sign of a life well lived, Red.

If The Duke were alive today, he’d be playing Norman Borlaug.
Harry Paratestes
December 9th, 2006 at 7:38 pm [Reply]

Perhaps Johnny Hart has reverted to making non-jokes in the fashion that was popular some years ago. Ex: “I went to a tough school. It was so tough, in fact, that our principal had to be Norwegian!”
Obviously the crowd would go wild. Not.
Pinback65
December 9th, 2006 at 7:52 pm [Reply]

176–Or maybe Hart is writing the strip Exquisite Corpse-style, choosing random words that have no logical connection to each other, thus making us question the very act of “creating” a “comic strip.”

Nah, I’m still going with the post-stroke vaudevillian theory.
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
December 9th, 2006 at 8:10 pm [Reply]

“…My home town was so small, the hooker had to wear a helmet!”
Red Greenback
December 9th, 2006 at 8:19 pm [Reply]

How about a tree made out the real Rose Marie? Sorry, no, but we have another jalapeno pepper plant autographed by Morey Amsterdam.
-Speaking of Rose Marie, (I know, I know, the “ever notice how comic character “x” looks like real person so and so?” is gettind played out) but Celeste looks like Larry “Bud” Melman in drag.
efab
December 9th, 2006 at 9:00 pm [Reply]

66 – From chron.com’s “About Mark Trail” section:

Cherry Davis Trail
When Cherry and Mark finally married after years of courtship, she thought her troubles had come to an end. However, this lovely brunette is often right in the middle of some natural catastrophe, or inadvertently up to her pretty neck in some criminal caper. Willful and headstrong, Cherry literally grew up in the Lost Forest National Park. Her love of the woods, waters and wildlife it contains is fully as strong as Mark Trail’s.
Jennifer
December 9th, 2006 at 9:53 pm [Reply]

#175 Uncle Lumpy

If the Duke were alive today, he’d be incredibly old.
MonkeyHawk
December 9th, 2006 at 10:11 pm [Reply]

$181 – Jennifer:

If the Duke were alive today he’d be rolling over in his grave.
Bill Peschel
December 9th, 2006 at 10:23 pm [Reply]

“Her love of the woods, waters and wildlife it contains is fully as strong as Mark Trailâ€™s. ”

So that’s why she stays behind so often, while Kelly Welly is out in the wilderness with Mark?

Some naturalist
Jennifer
December 9th, 2006 at 11:34 pm [Reply]

#183

Hey, she has a potted plant! If she was gone all the time, who would water the *potted plant?* They don’t water themselves, you know. Plus, they do not understand hostility and are apt to get kidnapped if you don’t watch them constantly.

Damned nuisances, potted plants are.
Gadge Cubic, Mole Preener
December 9th, 2006 at 11:44 pm [Reply]

#163: Many people ask what is “Gadge Cubic, Mole Preener”? Why such a name? Ugh, “Gadge,” how did the name arrive? So I will tell you. It came in a vision–a man appeared atop a flying brick and said unto me, with a voice like a wah-wah trombone, “From this day on you are Gadge Cubic, Mole Preener, with 2 g’s.” “Thank you, Mister Man,” he said, thanking him.

Or: I explained this briefly a few weeks back, but despite being an Old Fogeyette, you evidently have a life and so do not compulsively read all 7,932 comments that appear here with each entry. We will repeat: Firesign Theatre put out a series of radio broadcasts in the early 1970s, the best of which were collected on a series of black vinyl platters, or “LP records” (a mystical device which caused a sharpish needle to dance microscopically within the wily walls of the wheeling warblings, which wigglings were wonderfully, uh, wamplified so we could all hear the loverly noise), released under the collective title “Dear Friends” (Firesign Theatre’s shorthand for smarmy preacherese). Those recordings (released primarily to radio stations) were in turn boiled down to a single mass of black plastic, also entitled Dear Friends, which compiled the best of those performances. Unlike their regular releases, which were rigorously scripted and sound-engineered (earning the troupe the title “The Beatles of Comedy” – you should definitely check out at least their first four releases if you haven’t), these were primarily improvised. They weren’t quite as good as the regular releases, but they certainly had their moments, among the better of which were two tracks wherein the members essentially riffed on the notion of “what’s on TV?” And it’s from one of those skits that my har-har moniker derives: at one point someone says something like such-and-such a show with “mole preener Gadge Cubic.” One (and only one) comment was posted by me under that name in that order, when I decided it worked better in context as the reverse. And there you have it: far more than you ever wanted to know about what’s all this “Gadge Cubic Mole Preener” business.
Dactyl
December 9th, 2006 at 11:59 pm [Reply]

A few random thoughts:

FBOFW – watching Liz regress is making me really, really, really look forward to the holidays this year. In other words, she’s driving me insane, and I hate her, because I know I’ll be acting just like she is after 24 hours with my extended family.

A3G – Seriously? Our next action shot is going to be watching the blond marvel do research at the library? (if that’s what the lion represents). What could be more exciting than that? ANYTHING!

And last but not least – Mark Trail. I’ll blow by the freakish way that little Mark (Randy?) is being drawn this week, which is just disturbing beyond belief. But I’ll move past that and onto what’s really bothering me about the strip. I know that Mark Trail is an idealized version of rural living, but as a former country dweller I’m here to tell you: the response to “hurt beaver on the side of the road” is never “oh, maybe we can help it!” The response is usually “that’s a shame,” or “Hey! Dinner!”
Marc
December 10th, 2006 at 12:06 am [Reply]

Throw away panel 1 of Hi and Lois;

So baby’s can drive now? Or has Browne not seen a car since model-t’s? are they in England? Hmm???

throw away Panel Two: Lois loves to see how many broccolli and bananas can fit in her cooch.
MonkeyHawk
December 10th, 2006 at 12:18 am [Reply]

#185 — Mole Preener”

“…caused a sharpish needle to dance microscopically within the wily walls of the wheeling warblings, which wigglings were wonderfully, uh, wamplified…”

Please try to avoid technical terms in your posts. Some of the others might not understand.
Heckler123
December 10th, 2006 at 12:28 am [Reply]

#185, Gadge Cubic, Mole Preener – So it is only by the grace of God that you’re not Gerbil in the Tailpipe? I am actually slightly familiar with Firesign Theatre, but I am baffled by these rotating black vinyl platters of which you speak.

By the way, I had never heard of Gil Thorp before coming to this site. While I am sure that a veritable plethora of information can be found on the Internet, I would appreciate it if some generous curmudgeonite could fill me in on the whole (Death to) Gil Thorp thing.
ltrftp(not so first time)
December 10th, 2006 at 12:29 am [Reply]

Queek.
No, like Josh I respect copyrights.
johncomic
December 10th, 2006 at 12:30 am [Reply]

169 Pinback65: “…Groucho had, after all, been funny once.”

So was Hart. In the 60s. I’m tellin’ ya, man, I was there.
Poteet
December 10th, 2006 at 12:41 am [Reply]

#186 — Dactyl, as a current rural resident, I think I would substantially agree with you, though I’ve known the occasional rural person, myself included, to try to aid an injured wild animal. But I sure wouldn’t do it by approaching said wild animal and just picking it up with my bare hands, no matter how cute it was. That’s often dangerous even with injured domestic animals.

#189 — Heckler, I think that (Death To) was first added by eloquent CC Cardinal Islamorada Girl, and was enthusiastically adopted by others because Gil Thorp is so loathed here. I do not read Gil Thorp (and I repeat that to myself sometimes, as I find myself reading other strips that I never on this earth thought I’d end up reading). But the comments about (DT)GT are enough to tell me that it is amazingly bad.
Gadge Cubic, Mole Preener
December 10th, 2006 at 1:02 am [Reply]

I’m not sure who the longest-serving Cardinals are – but I’m pretty sure Islamorada Girl is among them. I think our elders should stand up and be counted (even if they’re not actually our elders) so as to allow us a ~~larger target~~ better opportunity to applaud their longtime support of Josh and his ongoing efforts to avoid needing to have a job that requires him to wear clothing other than pajama bottoms and frilly Cretan workingman’s blouses all day long.
Bobdog
December 10th, 2006 at 1:10 am [Reply]

Ziggy – Ha ha! Ziggy’s hopelessly in debt! He’s living the American dream!
Poteet
December 10th, 2006 at 1:17 am [Reply]

#193 — Gadge, I agree.
Poteet
December 10th, 2006 at 1:46 am [Reply]

12/10

FW — Geez, what a wonderful punchline (NOT)! Reading FW every day is feeling more and more like stabbing my hand with a pencil.

A3G — That profile of Lu Ann in the sixth panel is very unflattering. Quit with the aging Lu Ann profiles already! The Margo head bobbles are bad enough.

RMMD — Niki looks thirteen like I look thirteen. Why do the children in this strip age so tragically early? Why are they deprived of normal childhoods with normal necks and normal hairstyles?

JP — Okay, so the campaign storyline is looking better. But I’d still rather be in Paris.

MW — Hey, Dent morphed into Snideley Whiplash in the last two panels! Kewl!!
ChefMike
December 10th, 2006 at 3:31 am [Reply]

MW:So, here’s my question. Given that Mr. Dent has just called Ella out for running an illegal business, wouldn’t it be proper to find out just how he knows? And couldn’t Ella, in turn, call him on the carpet for soliciting her? especially if she doesn’t normally take money for this kind of stuff? also given that she’s just a 90 year old busybody, who would PAY her for meddling anyway? Also is Mary perhaps thinking she’s been missing out on a golden opportunity if people actually have been paying Ella all this time?
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 10th, 2006 at 3:32 am [Reply]

Oh no, someone mentioned Groucho Marx to Johnny Hart, and now he’s in the strip!

The first two panels with the pipe-smoking ant are complete gibberish.

Then we get Grouchopithecus and a guest character from Tumbleweeds with an incredibly labored pun. I can hardly wait to see the Spanish version.
sarah
December 10th, 2006 at 3:34 am [Reply]

A3G: has LuAnn never seen a library, before?! I’ve never seen her look more blonde than she did in Sunday’s strip.

JP: I want their old artists back – wahhh!!!
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 10th, 2006 at 3:43 am [Reply]

The Phantom must have a very special horse if he can outrun an airplane. (I mean “aeroplane”. I guess Wambesiland is a former British colony.) Even a ghostly single-engine job with a ghostly bent propellor is probably good for at least 100 MPH.

Maybe he should go to the New York Public Library to see who owns the plane.
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 10th, 2006 at 3:49 am [Reply]

Which items did Slylock Fox find in the Old West movie set that don’t belong?

A human being?
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 10th, 2006 at 3:56 am [Reply]

Slylock Fox again.

FEMALS
RAT-ORC
LAN BLOWS
MINT SET
BIB ART
Donald The Anarchist
December 10th, 2006 at 4:06 am [Reply]

#169 At least when Dick Cavett told Groucho Marx he was a big fan, Groucho replied by saying, “Well, I could use a big fan on a hot day like this!” Hart would probably say, “That just shows how much the price of oil has gone up!!!” And you’d feel like you HAD to laugh. Or you could just kill him.
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 10th, 2006 at 4:08 am [Reply]

FOOB: Doesn’t his wife live in the same house as someone who already has a set of tools? He must have small tools for his trains, anyway. Or does he not let her touch his tools?

I’ve considered that myself. There was a time before I got married when I had a complete set of Allen wrenches. But I’m getting much better cooking now, so I remain silent. At least she hasn’t found the Dremel tool yet.

Please note I am completely avoiding any hint of vulgar suggestive humor in this discussion.
Dingo
December 10th, 2006 at 4:10 am [Reply]

Once I open the portal, I’m drawn again into the world of Sheilagh Shaugnessy. She has lived for seventeen years, now with a ruthlessly cruel and controlling man. She has learned how to grow and preserve her own vegetables. She has butchered and salted venison and beef. She has given birth four times – two stillborn children and two living. The living buried the dead. Harvey Rood, whose surname she has refused to accept (despite the legalities of marriage) is drinking more and is home less. Their car, no longer driveable, lies buried under a blanket of snow. Their one reliable connection to town is Ben, a sturdy five-year-old, good-natured gelding who knows his way home, even if his master is too drunk to guide him.

Please! Someone! Get it to stop!!!
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 10th, 2006 at 4:33 am [Reply]

All that the Google came up with was:

Almost as far down hill as Sheilagh Shaugnessy had to go to get water for the stove, so she could boil the water to warm the bottle of formula for her newborn baby. Sheilagh was a strong woman, and she knew the sooner she could stop breast-feeding, the sooner she would be able to regain her independence and her freedom. But without the water to boil the bottle, all would be lost and Sheilagh would end up having to give away her precious bodily fluids to a baby who would dominate her and treat her with disrespect as her husband Harvey Rood does. So, Sheilagh continued to struggle down the hill, further and further down untilâ€¦Ouch! I am going to have to stop leaning over in my chair like that.

A reference to Dr. Strangelove, ha ha.

My son, there is a space between the ears
That must be filled, for better or for worse â€“

For authentic Canadian Prairie writing, you have to look at something like Sarah Binks, “the Sweet Songstress of Saskatchewan”, by Paul Hiebert.

She loved him as only a woman can love
A man with only one ear,

or perhaps more appropriately:

Patrick O’Neil O’Connell,
Late of the Mounted Police,
And Moon-in-the-Eyes Macdonald,
Are blessed, but not by the priest â€“

Now that’s real writing!
Nate Birch
December 10th, 2006 at 4:42 am [Reply]

I believe Nolan and Barreto used to work on Batman comics in the early to mid 90s together…Nolan as the main artist with Barreto as his inker.

So they’ve been an artistic team for some time.
Dingo
December 10th, 2006 at 4:52 am [Reply]

Mr. O’Malley, thank you for post #206. Personally, I would like to hear Buffy St. Marie put the words

“She loved him as only a woman can love
A man with only one ear”

to music. It sounds like it would be a jig.

Thank you to everyone who posted a comment regarding my #75 (”The Affair of the Neckbrace”). It was fun to write.
Shannon
December 10th, 2006 at 5:31 am [Reply]

Man, Judge Parker is a real dick today. Making snide comments about people’s substance abuse? Low. Low. Low. Low. Low.

That is Parker, right? I can never tell these black-and-blue-haired 50’s-style hunks apart.
Mr. Oâ€™Malley
December 10th, 2006 at 6:22 am [Reply]

OBH is kind of funny today. Especially since I love Edward G. Robinson’s gangster movies.
True Fable
December 10th, 2006 at 8:52 am [Reply]

BC: The Christmas tree/rosemary/jalepeno/Red Adair strip is a fine example of what happens when you have three different setups for a comic strip but are all used up at the same time. Potentially (major word when talking about Johnny Hart) we could have seen three funny strips. Instead we get Joke Cross-Pollenation.

JP: I liked the smartass remark. It’s about time someone in the strip said something that DESERVES a shocked reaction and spidey-sense waves from people who have no connection to SM, except for sharing firm jawlines.

MW: Mary is going after Ella with stealth and cunning. We all know perfectly well who told Mr. Dent’s wife he was cheating. If Mary is smart, she’ll keep Ella around to catch hell for all of Mary’s gossip, should it backfire.

Ease up, Mary. Let the line play out a little more and then set the hook firmly in the jaw.

FBOFW: Don’t you have to pay for food at the mall ahead of time? How did John manage to pay for her dinner if she was already eating there when he arrived? Damn it, Lynn. He should have just arranged to have a bottle of Scotch sent to her table if you’re going to screw around like this.

By the way, could someone tell me WHY it is called FOOB? Where do the double o’s come in, or is that just one of those inexplicable Lynn Johnson, send over a bottle of Scotch kind of things?

oh, and Liz: two words. Brass Knuckles. It’s amazing how quickly April will get the hell out of your space if you have a set of those, and John and Elly DID tell you to handle things yourself. *insert evil laugh here*
Dennis Jimenez
December 10th, 2006 at 9:29 am [Reply]

12.9.2006 – MW – Thomas E. Dewey shows the same incisive legal mind that made him President of the United States – oh wait….
Ukulele Ike
December 10th, 2006 at 9:35 am [Reply]

205: “…two stillborn children and two living. The living buried the dead.”

So, I’m getting this mental image of two toddlers digging two little graves, like two kids in a sandbox with their little pails and shovels, and I’m not liking it one little bit. No, sir.

A3G: Well, LuAnn doesn’t NEED to know how to use a library, as she can just work her blonde wiles on the geeky male librarians and get them to do her research for her. This is probably the same method she used back in Art School.

MT: Heh heh heh. He said “Tongass.”
ltrftp(not so first time)
December 10th, 2006 at 9:40 am [Reply]

211 – True Fable, Canadian Food Courts are like Canadian Health Care, so much better than the American system.

Richer folks pay for poorer.
ltrftp(not so first time)
December 10th, 2006 at 9:41 am [Reply]

213
“We Are Seven” by WWordsworth comes to mind, eh?
grinderman
December 10th, 2006 at 10:04 am [Reply]

Latest MW:

And here I thought Thomas Dewey was going to kill Ella Byrd, natuarally letting everyone think Mary had knocked her off.

What a let-down!
grinderman
December 10th, 2006 at 10:05 am [Reply]

Latest MW:

And here I thought Thomas Dewey was going to kill Ella Byrd, natuarally letting everyone think Mary had knocked her off.

What a let-down!
Dean Booth
December 10th, 2006 at 10:07 am [Reply]

With Fox Trot leaving, the Columbus Dispatch is allowing readers to vote for the comic to replace it. Here are the candidates:

â€¢ Dog Eat Doug
â€¢ Frazz
â€¢ Lio
â€¢ Pearls Before Swine
â€¢ Pickles

I don’t know these comics. Please advise.

Samples and Voting
Sheilagh
December 10th, 2006 at 10:17 am [Reply]

Kudos, for the first and only time, to Hagar the Horrible. That is a truly well-drawn cartoon of a startled duck in today’s strip.
bo
December 10th, 2006 at 10:29 am [Reply]

Woah, the reporter got her hair dyed in the middle of the interview…and stole Celeste’s jacket…. and Celeste got a new jacket…… not so sure I’m even reading the same comic anymore
Seamus Gentz
December 10th, 2006 at 10:30 am [Reply]

You forget one thing: This Hagar the Horrible was clearly a poop joke.
Sheilagh
December 10th, 2006 at 10:37 am [Reply]

Well, I forgive the artist for not drawing a squirting duck.
Calico
December 10th, 2006 at 10:40 am [Reply]

#170 -Sunday 12/10, I think this is the sub artist (see credits) other than Nolan. Celeste has gained about 20 lbs. of empty booze calories overnight, and the specs changed again!
What is she drinking and can I try some? (Not)Limoncello?
I’ll bet she carries a jewel-encrusted, monogrammed hip flask too.
Poteet
December 10th, 2006 at 10:53 am [Reply]

#205 — Dingo, I’ve already ranted about Michael’s ghastly prose, and won’t repeat, but thanks for letting the unwary know just what we Foob-letter readers have been suffering through:-).

Also, I see that Michael on the Foobsite is no longer animated, but his new pose is, um…a little odd?
Poteet
December 10th, 2006 at 11:01 am [Reply]

#211 — True Fable, “foob” is Lynn-invented fake Apwil teen slang that combines “fool” and “boob.” Naturally we CCs adopted it to refer to the strip and the foobish denizens thereof.

And remember, the next time a CC newbie asks that question, it’s your turn to explain. That’s the way it works around here:-).
Len
December 10th, 2006 at 11:01 am [Reply]

So I’m confused. Are these two ladies gathered under city streeetlamps of an evening, Ladies of the Evening? Ho’s, that is.

And why do they find vampiric Lio adorable? Because he sucks?

http://www.gocomics.com/lio/2006/12/10/
Summerhouse
December 10th, 2006 at 11:30 am [Reply]

#196 Poteet: “Why are they deprived of normal childhoods with normal necks….” Bwahahahhaha!
I bow to you.
ChefMike
December 10th, 2006 at 11:58 am [Reply]

FOOB: a toolkit is something every woman can use. and Elly, being Supermom, probably already has one. I think a better (and more exciting for John) lead in would have been “there’s nothing that every woman enjoys more than a good train, dont ya think?” Geez, John, just buy her a diamond tennis bracelet or some similar thing and be done with it!
Old Fogeyette
December 10th, 2006 at 12:06 pm [Reply]

Gadge Cubic, Mole Preener, thank you so much! Sorry I made you repeat yourself. I don’t really have a life, but nor do I have time to read every single post anymore. Now I will have to get a Firesign Theater DVD.

FOOB: Well, duh, what every woman wants for Christmas, at least what I want for Christmas and most other days, is to have sex.

JP: Yippee! Celeste is letting loose! Pure alcoholic gold!

218: Pickles is harmless and sweet, and sometimes funny. PBS is jarring, often offensive, and sometimes funny. I don’t know the others, but love the title “Doug Eat Doug.” Try to get them to include “Brewster Rockit.” It’s great and almost always funny. I’m hoping that’s what our paper will put in when Foxtrot is gone.
Saxman
December 10th, 2006 at 12:14 pm [Reply]

128:

Looks like a sweep for Pearls, although personally I’d go for Lio.

Both Pearls and Lio are suitaly twisted and should appeal to anyone who already reads CC. Pearls is somewhat more narrative. Lio usually a one shot. I like to think Lio is an evil parallel universe version of Calvin and Hobbs, where Calvin never had a Hobbs and is therefore much darker and out of touch with what the mundanes call normalcy.

Both Pearls and Lio have excellent Sunday strips. So is Foxtrots Sunday sticking around for you?
Saxman
December 10th, 2006 at 12:20 pm [Reply]

199

More details on trendy walkup Manhattan firetraps are available on the Internet.
Anonymous
December 10th, 2006 at 12:36 pm [Reply]

207- “I believe Nolan and Barreto used to work on Batman comics in the early to mid 90s togetherâ€¦Nolan as the main artist with Barreto as his inker.

So theyâ€™ve been an artistic team for some time. ”

Doesn’t seem to be terribly often, according to this list of Nolan’s comics, but they did work together on at least several occasions:
http://www.ing.umu.se/~me00aen/graham.htm
Poteet
December 10th, 2006 at 1:03 pm [Reply]

#229 — Yes, Fogeyette, come to think of it, why is John finding this so difficult? Besides your suggestion, there is also the happy prospect of eating a really good meal that one hasn’t had to cook oneself, or a nice massage, or any number of other gifts that involve easily-obtained gift certificates. And if Ellie would be insulted or hurt by a gift certificate, send it to me.
Citric
December 10th, 2006 at 1:12 pm [Reply]

MW- This is all a setup to get Ella in Mary’s apartment/pants.
Gadge Cubic, Mole Preener
December 10th, 2006 at 1:29 pm [Reply]

Somebody better check on Josh – you know, we could probably keep this thing going for days and days and days before a neighbor, noticing an unpleasant odor, breaks his door down and discovers his mangled, half-eaten-by-cats body.

Anyway: Is it my mind, or is Johnston actually throwing in a semi-dirty joke in the first, throwaway panel of Sunday’s FOOB? I mean, “Whiff of Lust” and “Eau de Bodice” are obvious enough (but tame), but, uh, “Kumquat Spritz”?

Dammit – now I just got an image of Elly in position I did not want to imagine. I’ll be back after soaking my eyeballs in lye.
Gadge Cubic, Mole Preener
December 10th, 2006 at 1:30 pm [Reply]

I would also like to point out that “kumquat spritz” (joined at the “t”) would make a hellacious Scrabble score.
Dean Booth
December 10th, 2006 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

Saxman and others: thanks for the comic critique. Yes, we’ll keep Foxtrot on Sundays.
Mibbitmaker
December 10th, 2006 at 1:47 pm [Reply]

#205: “the living bury the dead”… Yeah, Michael, like the reverse is going to happen? That’d be both really disturbing and literally impossible.

#206: Give away her “precious bodily fluids”? Uh, isn’t that what those particular fluids are for?! I mean, breast-feeding or not is an obviously valid personal choice, but how vital is the milk outside of nursing? And the baby treats her with the same disrespect as her loser husband? It’s a freakin’ BABY, for cryin’ out loud!

Let me guess, Michael Foob wrote this, too, right?
Mibbitmaker
December 10th, 2006 at 1:58 pm [Reply]

Today:

RMMD: “No!”? Uh, June, it was a rhetorical question. “Chief, we got a live one!” Lemme guess, the mother, right? Nice subtle foreshadowing there, guys! …Or maybe it’s just Margo showing up to cause trouble…

MF: Oh, my god…. I’m stunned!… A conservative said something’s better at saving money than… than government……..I’ve got to lie down!….. I… I can’t take this shock!

In other words: YAAAAWNNN! (sleep)
Audible Sigh
December 10th, 2006 at 1:59 pm [Reply]

This thread may be on its last legs, so I guess if doesn’t matter if I post about some days old comics inspired by that Luann-Home Depot thread some time back. Anyway, now when I see namebrands in the comics, I’m thinking sponsorship and noticed 2 in Friday’s LA Times:
Brewster Rockit
Frazz
Sunday’s Foob missed their opportunity; John could have been inspired to buy brand-specific tools for his unfortunate wife instead of just any old crappy generic toolkit. In any case, those tools would most likely not include the one she had in mind.

Also, in JP, I felt kind of bad for Celeste. Yeah, I know she and spouse were trying to derail Randy with their whole “not-the-marrying-kind” thing, but getting on her case for spending time in rehab does seem a bit underhanded. She was trying to get help for her oh so hilariously over-the-top addiction, it’s not like she ran over people and their pet bear while downing whiskey from the corner liquor store just before plummeting off a cliff, killing her sole passenger, a wayward teenaged boy with gravity-defying hair.
Regardless it’s hard enough to care about the judicial candidates never mind their spouses or lack thereof.
Dean Booth
December 10th, 2006 at 2:28 pm [Reply]

Could someone get me this for Xmas, please?

Old Popeye
Doug Puthoff
December 10th, 2006 at 2:43 pm [Reply]

12-10–

FC–That snowman looks disturbing like Richard Nixon in Hawaii.

Kid City–James Watt looks disturbingly like Bill Cosby.

BB–More information (as if any were needed) that Campy Swampy is really Hell. Now I just gotta find out who really runs the place. After the “fever” incident a week or so back involving Zero and Miss Buxley, I’ve thrown him out of the picture.

MF–As cheap as “Wal Mart” is, I’d rather go to a nearby dollar store, it doesn’t take as long.

FT–At least Amend didn’t put Outkast’s “Hey Ya.” as background music. (Search for “Charlie Brown” and “Hey Ya” on YouTube.

Rhymes with Orange–Ms. Price, It’s “Revelation,” not “Revelations.” We can tell she’s a liberal. More information about the Bible can be found on the Internet.
AppleGirl
December 10th, 2006 at 3:20 pm [Reply]

75 – Dingo, I am speechless. You are so talented. Beautifully wriiten. The Costner, Rumsfeld and McCartney references are brilliant and hilarious. I nominate your masterpiece for COTY (comment of the YEAR.)

We all have such a bleak Christmas to look forward to in FOOBville, don’t we?
scuppers
December 10th, 2006 at 3:22 pm [Reply]

229–All I want for xmas is a high end sex toy. More about HEST’s can be found at

http://sexuality.about.com/od/sextoys/tp/christmas_gift1.htm

yup, that’s right, on the internet, and no, I don’t know how to create a hyperlink.
Ukulele Ike
December 10th, 2006 at 3:42 pm [Reply]

Another crummy installment of “Rose is Rose” this morning, saved only by the cheap printing of my New York Sunday Daily News, which made the “Chop chop stir stir flick flick shake shake….” sound effects in panel four look like “Chop chop stir stir fuck fuck shake shake….”
Dingo
December 10th, 2006 at 3:50 pm [Reply]

Mi cachorro, Gadge Cubic: whereas “kumquat spritz” would make a great Scrabble score, it is – alas – a proper noun (if’n there really was a perfume called Kumquat Spritz). As such, it cannot be used in Scrabble.

More information about Scrabble may be found on the internet.
AppleGirl
December 10th, 2006 at 4:09 pm [Reply]

FBOFW – I am so over these empty souls who wander around the malls, trying to get ideas for gifts. If you really don’t have an idea of what to get your wife for Christmas, then give the gift of a hassle-free holiday: neither one of you “has to” buy something for the other. And no, the tool kit is really not a good idea.

RETAIL – This is my favorite comic strip, and today it features a shout-out to all of us MST3K fans here at CC:
http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/fun/retail.asp
Dingo
December 10th, 2006 at 4:45 pm [Reply]

If there’s anything more splendid than the post-coital expressions on two men in suits in the last panel of today’s Judge Parker, please tell me what it is. All that’s missing from the image is both of them smoking cigarettes and a santorum-spooged sheet. Hmm… maybe that could be a bad joke in the future:

What’s the difference between the lovers in Judge Parker and Mary Worth?

Depends
Dingo
December 10th, 2006 at 4:53 pm [Reply]

To AppleGirl:

All the Foobs down in Foobville liked Christmas a lot,
but the Lynnch, who lived just north of Foobville, did not.
The Lynnch hated Christmas – the whole Christmas season.
Oh, please don’t ask why, no one quite knows the reason.
It could be, perhaps, that her t’ain’t was too tight.
Or maybe her head wasn’t screwed on just right.
But I think that the best reason of all
may have been that her schnoz was sized like a football.
queek
December 10th, 2006 at 5:10 pm [Reply]

218

Frazz is quite possibly the best new strip that I’ve seen in years. Truly delightful on many levels.

Lio is Gorey-esq in its weirdness, and is also one of my favorite new strips. A darker 3-panel Far Side on its best days.

PBS is inconsistant, but when its on, its wonderful. Also some of the worst puns on the comics pages, which for me is a good thing.

Dog Eat Doug had a trial run in one of our local papers, and it wasn’t nearly as good as I’d hoped.

Pickles is old-folks lame, starring lame old folks.
Albatross
December 10th, 2006 at 5:24 pm [Reply]

As frightening as this will be, I have to warn you people: Apartment 3-G can predict the future! Don’t believe me? Go back and re-read this comment and the number 45, three after it. Margo may be a young Joan Crawford, but Tommie is apparently Britney Spears!

Suddenly the meaning of the strip is clear! Gina is actually Lindsay Lohan, who will refer to Britney as a dowdy spinster, and look for Paris Hilton (Luann) to meet a gay cowboy while wandering aimlessly through a haunted building!
True Fable
December 10th, 2006 at 5:28 pm [Reply]

#248 – my vote for COTW. “Depends” omfg, brilliant!

#225 – I was afraid of that! Fool/boob, huh? So the strip really IS all about Anthony!

DtM back in the day, Dennis would have pointed to the Free Kittens sign and said something like, “Look, it’s Rolf’s menu!” or “I betcha I can train one of those to shit in Mom’s shoes by bedtime!” or, “If I toss them at Mr. Wilson when he’s napping, I bet it’ll only take two to give him a heart attack!”

The kid’s a MENACE, he’s not supposed to be kind and give soft cuddly Christmas gifts.
AppleGirl
December 10th, 2006 at 5:35 pm [Reply]

253 – Thank you for an absolutely charming Christmas in Foobville, Sir Dingo!

And I do believe that her tâ€™ainâ€™t is too tight. Definitely.
Summerhouse
December 10th, 2006 at 5:36 pm [Reply]

Apt3G: If that totally happening librarian in the pink outfit isn’t wearing the shiniest pair of white vinyl go-go boots EVER behind that desk, then…the world no longer makes sense.
heckler123
December 10th, 2006 at 6:30 pm [Reply]

#255, Dingo – Thanks a lot. Now I have “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch” running through my mind.

Stink, stank, stunk.
Gadge Cubic, Mole Preener
December 10th, 2006 at 6:58 pm [Reply]

Dingo: Yes, if it existed, “Kumquat Spritz” would be a brand name…but it doesn’t, and each of those words is a regular ol’ noun. The real problem is that they’re two words, and I don’t believe there’s any way to set them both down on the same turn, even with one word going across and the other word going down.

(I wonder which word would be going down?)
Spotted HÃ˜rse
December 10th, 2006 at 7:03 pm [Reply]

#232 Len: Yes, little Lio is stalking him some prostitutes! I tend to get offended when I see kids combined with hookers for pop entertainment wackiness… and I’m not too delighted when I see the old cliche perpetuated that prostitutes are fair game for being, uhhh, well in this case, scared by a prepubescent kid wearing fangs and a cloak. Okay, I admit, I’m a crank…

MT: Molly the Bear and the beaver will bond anthropomorphically over how scary the world of Nature is, and how sad it is to be misunderstood.

FC: I really, really enjoyed the teddy’s cracked open head and leaking skull. You can’t really comprehend how much you need to see a leaking skull in FC until you see it, and know satisfaction.
Poteet
December 10th, 2006 at 7:08 pm [Reply]

#253 — Ohmigawd, someone who feels the same way I do about the merry jolly no-hassle Christmas-gift option, to whit, not buying one! I knew you had to be out there somewhere…

#255 — Nice work, Dingo.
Uncle Lumpy
December 10th, 2006 at 7:19 pm [Reply]

Here at Lumpy Farms, everybody’s getting poetry. Mostly pornographic, and mostly about Margo.
Poteet
December 10th, 2006 at 7:22 pm [Reply]

#169 & 171 — Fogeyette and Heckler, please pardon if I while away the time before Josh returns with one more vomit story, being as how Heckler’s made me laugh like a drain.

My sister was in Mexico with a college study-abroad program when she and some classmates went to a street fair that featured a ride like a ferris wheel. But the cars were entirely enclosed with grillwork and they somersaulted repeatedly, besides moving around the big wheel. One student couldn’t take it, and at the top of the big wheel, let loose. His copious vomit fell through the grillwork and sprinkled like rain on the unfortunate riders and crowd below. His nickname, for some time after that, was “Barfin’ Bielowski.”
AppleGirl
December 10th, 2006 at 7:41 pm [Reply]

264 – Poteet, my family has been doing the no-hassle Christmas for the past 10 years. The whole shopping-for-gifts thing adds too much stress to an already stressful time of year. Just say no to shopping. It’s worked out great for us. No disappointments, no resentments.
AppleGirl
December 10th, 2006 at 7:48 pm [Reply]

266 – Hehe, I know that ride very well! One time I won a lot of cigarettes at one of the game booths. The cigs were in my jacket pockets, and they were loose, not in packs. Then I got on that ride. The thing started twirling, and all my cigs fell through the cage. Each time around, I looked down and saw the carnie guy picking up more cigs from the ground.

Amazing to think that carnie games back in the day gave loose cigarettes as prizes.
Poteet
December 11th, 2006 at 1:11 am [Reply]

#265 — Uncle Lumpy, what wonderful presents. I’ll bet they all scan perfectly and are literately hilarious (oops, not sure that’s a word — oh well).

#267 — AppleGirl, I wish you and your family a Merry Unusually-Sane Christmas. Your collective reasoning sure makes sense to me. As for that ride, I’m afraid just the threat of being strapped into it would cause me to betray my country immediately:-).
Dingo
December 11th, 2006 at 1:29 am [Reply]

Poteet and AppleGirl, why is the United States spending billions of dollars to eradicate a country when all we needed was a Mexican ferris wheel? I can’t wait to see that added to the Geneva Convention:

No waterboarding
No electric shock
No Sandra Bullock movies
No plutonium-laced sushi
NO MEXICAN FERRIS WHEELS

Oh, and AppleGirl, I’d have given anything if as the carny picked them up you screamed, “My tampons!”
AppleGirl
December 11th, 2006 at 3:13 am [Reply]

270 – Dingo, as always, you think of the perfect thing to say. Hehe.
Study Abroad Thailand
September 15th, 2008 at 5:15 pm [Reply]

That was a great post. I will have to bookmark this site so I can read more later.
siva
November 12th, 2008 at 5:48 pm [Reply]

Nice comical story.Have to think a lot.
————-
siva

quebec drug rehab
ireland study abroad
February 18th, 2009 at 6:46 pm [Reply]

great tips. I enjoyed reading this

Please read the posting and discussion policies before posting. You are not required to supply an e-mail address to comment; however, doing so decreases the likelihood of your comment being flagged as spam. E-mail addresses will never be made public or seen by anyone but the site writers, who may use them to communicate with commentors.

Archives:

Comment of the week:

Main navigation:

Main content:

Metapost: Inside scoop!

274 responses to “Metapost: Inside scoop!”

Leave a Reply

All the cool kids…

Randomly Selected Post O’ Mystery