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WEEP JEFFY WEEP

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Crock, 8/1/10

Why the long face, Captain? In addition to all the other advantages to being a handsome Legionnaire that you mention, you apparently are also in possession of eternal youth! Go on, seduce the young woman, safe in the knowledge that, like her grandmother, she will age and wither and eventually die, while you grow more handsome with each passing day.

Family Circus, 8/1/10

Wow, is this the greatest Family Circus ever? It provides no punchline, no play on words, and yet still gives America exactly what America wants: little Jeffy crying his little eyes out. Of course, we may come to regret this momentary pleasure, as history may record August 1st, 2010, as the day that the Winkerbeaning of the Family Circus began.

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One menace cannot stand alone

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Dennis the Menace, 7/31/10

I suppose that it’s mildly menacing that Dennis refuses to join any sort of square, organized group like the Boy Scouts. More menacing still is Mr. Wilson’s even grumpier than usual expression. Now revealed to be the leader of a uniformed paramilitary organization, he plots to use his army of children to purge the neighborhood of “undesirable elements” (i.e., the Mitchells), once and for all.

Herb and Jamaal, 7/31/10

This strip is like a “Goofus and Gallant” cartoon explaining how to be on the down low. INCORRECT WAY TO DEAL WITH THE AFTERMATH OF A DRUNKEN 3 A.M. BOOTY CALL: “That phone call I made last night, that never happened, right? Eh?” CORRECT WAY: Pushing it deep, down into your unconscious mind, so that even you can’t remember it, except in your dreams.