Ho ho ho merry merry
Hagar the Horrible, 12/19/05
OK, let’s leave aside the fact that Hagar and Lucky Eddie are Odin-revering pagans and wouldn’t care about this so-called “Christmas” anyway. They could still have themselves a rockin’ solstice party on their boat. A little yule-log worship, a lot of mead, and then some savage pillaging of northern France, burning scores of villages to the ground, killing the men and enslaving the women and children. Should be a hoot!
Mainly, this comic struck me because it’s further proof that major comics artists are stealing my thoughts. Think I’m a paranoid loon? Well, read this article in today’s Baltimore Sun and then decide for yourself. But if you want to see a picture of me in my robe, or of a faithful reader of this blog wearing a lampshade for a hat, you’ll have to go out and lay your hands on a physical copy of the paper. (It’s not too late, Baltimore-area folks!)
Update: Hmm, since last I looked, they’ve added pictures to the online story, so save your 50 cents. (You’re really not going to understand what I’m talking about without looking at it now, so click the link, I beg of you.)
Hysterical Woman
December 20th, 2005 at 9:50 am
Not first! What an annoying meme.
Anyway, seeing that Xmas office parties are for embarrassing office hook-ups, who does Hagar show his manly Viking love to? Lucky, perhaps? They have already had a threesome with his wife.
BillBrasky
December 20th, 2005 at 10:03 am
So Josh, what did you say in the article instead of “[body parts]“? I hope it was “balls” or “ballsac.” Please inform.
theNewGuy
December 20th, 2005 at 10:03 am
Second!
Yeah, It always bothered me that for the most part, Hagar is nothing like it’s setting. They’re basically Fat Blondie Characters…. that Pillage instead of sleep on the job…
OK, so I’m out in left field on that, sue me.
theNewGuy
December 20th, 2005 at 10:04 am
..third ouch (and fourth)
RichM
December 20th, 2005 at 10:58 am
I thought those Capital One people would throw a nice little party for Hagar and the other Horribilians in their commercials. How cheap.
pengoons
December 20th, 2005 at 11:07 am
Congratulations! Good article …and just in time for holiday notes to all your aunts, uncles and other extended familians who have been worried about you and dropping hints about real jobs and tossing you into the same conversational bowl with your cousin who got arrested and their great niece that can’t seem to quit smoking. Aha, you get to say, if it ain’t a real job why am I in the paper, huh? You got ‘em now…
pengoons
December 20th, 2005 at 11:09 am
Congratulations! Good article …and just in time for holiday notes to all your aunts, uncles and other extended familians who have been worried about you and dropping hints about real jobs and tossing you in the same conversational bowl with your cousin who got arrested and their great niece that can’t seem to quit smoking. Aha, you get to say, if it ain’t a real job why am I in the paper, huh? You got ‘em now…
Chawunky
December 20th, 2005 at 11:12 am
I’m having a weird little experience–I’m being struck by how nicely this Hagar strip is drawn.
Nothing else to add. I just like the attempt at subtle perspective in panel one and the proscenium arch that comprises panel two.
Call me Johnny
December 20th, 2005 at 11:30 am
Me? I would like to know how they are plowing through waist high snow so effortlessly. Oh, those crafty Vikings!
Anonymous
December 20th, 2005 at 11:38 am
They must have some kind of snow melting force field around them. You can see that there’s already a clearing in front of Lucky Eddie before he’s even got to that spot.
Jacob
December 20th, 2005 at 11:55 am
Hagar is using “miss” in a backwards, messed-up way that I’ve heard before, but that makes no sense. He doesn’t miss not having a 9-to-5 job. He misses having a 9-to-5 job. Unless he wishes to imply that he currently does have a 9-to-5 job as a viking pillager, and he misses the days when he did not have such a job.
That’s all I want to say.
Grandpas Dead
December 20th, 2005 at 12:03 pm
No. 10: Looking at that clearing in front of Lucky Eddie makes me think they’re not moving at all, but taking a pit stop.
Lucky Eddie Sez: Don’t Eat The Yellow Snow!
Chris
December 20th, 2005 at 12:19 pm
# Jacob says:
December 20th, 2005 at 11:55 am
Hagar is using “miss†in a backwards, messed-up way that I’ve heard before, but that makes no sense. He doesn’t miss not having a 9-to-5 job. He misses having a 9-to-5 job. Unless he wishes to imply that he currently does have a 9-to-5 job as a viking pillager, and he misses the days when he did not have such a job.
That’s all I want to say.
I second that.
dalton
December 20th, 2005 at 12:32 pm
damn internet celebrities…
dimestore lipstick
December 20th, 2005 at 12:42 pm
“They even posted a notice above the kitchen sink: YOUR MOTHER DOESN’T WORK HERE — PLEASE WASH YOU’RE OWN MUGS.”
I love the fact that the sign has the obligatory misuse of the apostrophe. Makes it so much more authentic.
Unless that was just a typo in the article.
Mat
December 20th, 2005 at 12:43 pm
Or he moved the snow, then moved back because Hagar stopped.
Lloyd Spivak
December 20th, 2005 at 12:56 pm
Just wanted to say the revelation that your in Baltimore, and your reasons for being here are a pleasant surprise. I moved here seven years ago myself. On the whole, I’ve really liked the place. Now if I could just find a job that would let me work at home in my bathrobe…
yellojkt
December 20th, 2005 at 12:56 pm
I read that headline on my way to Luann and Phantom this morning and missed entirely that it was about you. They even plugged the blog. You must have kissed some ass at the Sunpapers somewhere along the way.
Way to go!
Concerned Citizen
December 20th, 2005 at 12:59 pm
Hey, this is a great opportunity to invite the equally remorseful Dik Browne or whoever really does Hagar to your holiday festivities. I’ll bet he’s a laff riot. You could ask him when Hagar is going to off the Flagstons or pillage Camp Swampy.
BigJoe
December 20th, 2005 at 1:00 pm
Or he moved the snow, then moved back because Hagar stopped.
No! No logical explanations allowed!
csr
December 20th, 2005 at 1:03 pm
Your party sounds like a lot more fun than most of the office parties I’ve had to attend. An office party that makes fun of office parties! Perfect.
King Folderol
December 20th, 2005 at 1:04 pm
# Jacob says:
December 20th, 2005 at 11:55 am
Hagar is using “miss†in a backwards, messed-up way that I’ve heard before, but that makes no sense. He doesn’t miss not having a 9-to-5 job. He misses having a 9-to-5 job. Unless he wishes to imply that he currently does have a 9-to-5 job as a viking pillager, and he misses the days when he did not have such a job.
That’s all I want to say.
I wish I hadn’t read your comment, because now I’m envisioning this alternate side of the Viking world, where people work in offices, punch in and out, gossip over who’s pillaging whom by the water cooler, and take long lunches on the company time. I guess there had to be people who stayed in the villages while the seafaring Vikings went out and plundered from other countries, but I’ve never really wanted to think about Olef the Boatmaker before and his boring staff of 17.
hacky
December 20th, 2005 at 1:07 pm
Joshsays:
OK, let’s leave aside the fact that Hagar and Lucky Eddie are Odin-revering pagans and wouldn’t care about this so-called “Christmas†anyway. They could still have themselves a rockin’ solstice party on their boat.
No way! Last time some Vikings had a party on a boat, bad things happened.
No wonder God is a Packers fan.
Kaliflower
December 20th, 2005 at 2:05 pm
Dick Tracy’s onomatopoeia today is very confusing. ‘Squeee’ is fairly appropriate but ‘Smuk’ in the last panel doesn’t seem quite right. This is an enormous hunk of metal crashing into concrete glass and wood, can’t you just use ‘Crash’? Sure it’s cliched but ‘Smuk’ sounds like the truck is crashing into an enormous cake.
BigJoe
December 20th, 2005 at 2:19 pm
#24 – How about the fact that the truck is crashing into a high-rise auto repair shop? Don’t see one of those every day.
roydrink
December 20th, 2005 at 2:27 pm
Here’s a theory I’ve been working on for months:
Calvin & Hobbes stopped ten years ago, right? So if he was about 7-8-9 years old, he’d come back as an around 18 year old, right? ( “standard” comic-universe time of course…)
Calvin wouldn’t have done well in school, maybe not even getting a high school diploma, so he isn’t going to college & most likely be working a low paying job. Like a non-unionized school janitor, perhaps?
The wagon would have to be replaced by some other mode of transportation… How do you think he did going for his driver’s license? Spaceman Spiff rides again!!! So a bike would be his main mode of transportation, after Calvin finally mastered it.
The last part of the puzzle is that since Calvin “grew up” he personally can’t have those kid moments with Hobbes. But he could hang around kids who do have flights of fantasy, right?
The key is the hair. Changed a little bit, but still a bit messy.
*** Frazz is today’s Calvin…*gasp*
Check it out if you don’t believe me!
Final question: Does Bill Watterson get rights payments from Jef Mallett?
Further reading: http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/life/3482034.html
“Too much time on my hands”
yellojkt
December 20th, 2005 at 2:43 pm
Jeff Mallett denies this and Gene Weingarten alludes to it in the introduction he wrote for the Frazz collection. There is a superficial resemblence, but Frazz is way too mild mannered to be Calvin. Calvin is serving time somewhere strung out on Ritalin by now.
Ianscot
December 20th, 2005 at 2:45 pm
This one goes in the “What was that about again?” pile. The unusually careful composition — are we peering into a snow globe in which our Sisyphisian heroes perpetually lean into the wind? — hints that our artist drew first and then was confronted by a complete lack of any material for the word balloons.
Does Hagar missing office parties strike anyone as in any way appropriate to the characters? ARE there people in the world who would regret not working in an office because they miss office Christmas parties? Does the dialog strike anyone as at all, you know… funny? Because I’m missing it.
No, at best what we have here is a brave stand in favor of “Christmas” as opposed to “happy holidays,” watered down by a complete lack of imagination or cojones about the thing.
Josh
December 20th, 2005 at 2:49 pm
#15 (dimestore lipstick) sez — “‘They even posted a notice above the kitchen sink: YOUR MOTHER DOESN’T WORK HERE — PLEASE WASH YOU’RE OWN MUGS.’
I love the fact that the sign has the obligatory misuse of the apostrophe. Makes it so much more authentic. Unless that was just a typo in the article.”
Oh, no, DL, it’s very on purpose. Our dedication to authenticity is legendary. I’m very pleased, actually — Amber said it would be too obscure for anyone to get.
jf
dimestore lipstick
December 20th, 2005 at 3:21 pm
Glad to hear it was intentional. I assumed it on your part, but not on the Sun’s.
Marc
December 20th, 2005 at 3:23 pm
I love how the guy in the back of Mary Worth’s Jane Hand, is holding his hands out…instead of saying: “It was this big” it should be “Mary’s meddling is this annoying!”
Jay Nickola
December 20th, 2005 at 3:39 pm
Brilliant! Your unoffice party could only have been improved if you’d gotten Demotivators posters — “MEDIOCRITY,” “INCOMPETENCE,” etc.
Also — I’m COTW! Sweet sassy molassey! Time for a computer room touchdown dance! Luckily I’m home alone. Thanks, Curmudgeon!
Adouble
December 20th, 2005 at 3:42 pm
After watching many episodes of “Homicide”, “The Corner” and “The Wire”, I would never even dream of setting foot in Baltimore. I realize this fear must be somewhat misplaced, as nobody I know from Baltimore seems that rough, rugged or raw.
yellojkt
December 20th, 2005 at 3:44 pm
Congrats on COTW, Jay. I used to read Punch in the library as a little kid. (I know, I had a very strange childhood.) Is it still being published?
yellojkt
December 20th, 2005 at 3:47 pm
Adouble,
It’s good to know the Baltimore Anti-Chamber of Commerce is doing it’s job. We are the go-to city for filming gritty urban dramas. It keeps rich carpetbaggers out of our fair city so that it can remain an affordable oasis in the BosWash corridor.
Adouble
December 20th, 2005 at 4:03 pm
yellojkt,
I thought that was what Kyle Boller was for *rimshot*
(sorry Kyle, one good game against a crap team doesn’t mean you’re not a punchline).
mooselet
December 20th, 2005 at 4:59 pm
Congrats, Josh. Newspaper articles, podcasts… you’re becoming a regular celebrity! And all in your bathrobe. Good on ya!
Somehow it doesn’t seem very Viking-like to be wearing scarves. It makes me wonder if they have mittens on as well. If I had any respect for Hagar, I’d lose it. But since I don’t, well, feh.
TheRay
December 20th, 2005 at 5:46 pm
Josh, we are brothers, you and I, in the sense that for two years I sat with the crappiest copier (vintage 1992) in the office not ten feet from my back, and all anyone ever had to do was turn around to complain to me that it was broken again. What the hell? Great, I’m all mad again.
Lulu
December 20th, 2005 at 6:28 pm
Gah! I didn’t even have time to read the paper this morning! Damn this Christmas season and it’s time consuming requirements (as if the kids really need presents, anyway). I shall now dutifully go dig the paper out of the recycling and sit down with a wee glass of wine and see what all the excitement is about.
Sassy_Rocks
December 20th, 2005 at 6:52 pm
A few observations from todays comics:
1. Jane Hand’s “hand gesture” in panel one makes it look like she’s flashing her ex in some brazen display of gitsum goodness. The logic of divorcing then attempting to hook up again with the ex husband after spotting a pair of transparent divorce pigeons reminds me a little of a 40 something woman e-mailing her married ex-crush from high school and ending up marrying him. Not too real worldly.
2. The range of the chinkapin burr producing tree and the Ivory Billed woodpecker range do not overlap at any point. Are we to assume that the petnappers transported Andy hundreds of miles to a chinkapin burr location? That would make it a federal offense if they crossed state lines. Also, the chinkapin burr is typically 1 to 1.5 inches in diameter. The dognapping victim is not the most diligent of dog owners if he didn’t notice that for a few months. The old “let us know where you are at all times” ransom demand is quite clever for such overtly moronic criminals.
3. A lot of love in Judge Parker lately. Neddy is drawn differently lately as is Gloria Sanchez. I can tell it’s the same artist drawing them but they look different. They may have gotten cosmetic surgery. I think Ned’s all primed for a roll in the hay with boat boy and Randy is getting it on with his moustachioed aa as we speak.
randomdude
December 20th, 2005 at 7:37 pm
B.C. again.
http://www.comics.com/creators/bc/archive/bc-20051220.html
Anyone care to explain?
Marc
December 20th, 2005 at 7:53 pm
randomdude, its a john kerry joke :(. He would be better than bush…
randomdude
December 20th, 2005 at 7:57 pm
Marc… OK I’ll buy that perhaps it’s a John Kerry joke. So Hart thought it would be hilarious to make a joke about a guy who was a cadidate a year ago? Maybe tomorrow he’ll be really relevant and make a Dukakis joke.
Fred P.
December 20th, 2005 at 8:33 pm
#26, speaking of Calvin. what is up with today’s Foxtrot? I mean, its bad enough to rerun your own lame gags, but re-running (and rerunning in a lame-o way) someone else’s gag? Egregious.
Marc
December 20th, 2005 at 9:40 pm
randomdude: think of it this way…his strip takes place before the common era, so in a way it makes sense that he is making a joke from more than a year ago.
randomdude
December 20th, 2005 at 10:21 pm
At last. B.C. finally makes perfect sense to me. The entire point of the strip is to make jokes like they had in prehistory, before jokes were “funny” and “made sense”. It’s all so clear now!!
weiser
December 20th, 2005 at 11:16 pm
“They even posted a notice above the kitchen sink: YOUR MOTHER DOESN’T WORK HERE — PLEASE WASH YOU’RE OWN MUGS.â€
I always disliked that sign in my workplace-kitchens, so if my mother worked here she would be expected to cleanup after all of the rest of us?
Sharkbait
December 21st, 2005 at 12:05 am
Thank you for giving us home-workers some credibility, Josh. I may go ahead and spring for a bathrobe this year, as my webcam friends have been requesting for several years.
Elliott
December 21st, 2005 at 10:16 am
Josh, you look surprisingly like Harry Nilsson in that picture.
http://images.barnesandnoble.com/images/7250000/7250521.jpg
Sid
December 21st, 2005 at 10:39 am
You’ve been mentioned on the Language Log: http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/002719.html
Mibbitmaker
December 21st, 2005 at 11:30 pm
Josh, maybe you could’ve thrown off the copy machine complainers if you launched into SNL’s Richmeister before they opened their mouths. I can imagine a Curmudgeon version of that character. “Margo! Margo McHeadbobble! Mar-go-to-lah! Makin’ cop-iiiiies! Maaaaaaargoooooo…!”
Now, of course, workin’ a job at home, make-your-own-hours. Kinda like cartoonists do…..
Thus completes the circle. :o)
roydrink
December 21st, 2005 at 11:36 pm
yellojkt replied to my Calvin -Frazz theroty
“There is a superficial resemblence, but Frazz is way too mild mannered to be Calvin. Calvin is serving time somewhere strung out on Ritalin by now.”
Ah, but there’s more and better medications (drugs) now. I should know, I’ve tried most of them %^)
roydrink – butter living through chemistry!
Johnny Hart
December 22nd, 2005 at 11:44 pm
Kerry lost.
Deal with it.
This does not make Jesus very happy.
April
August 8th, 2007 at 4:01 pm
Dangit — for your time-travelling readers, is there a newer link? Baltimoresun.com did a massive re-arrange a few weeks ago. (Anyone else remember when it was sunspot.net and had their own version of “the spot” as a pre-blog web soap? I can’t remember the name of it, but one of my exes was in it — apparently he’s a stuntman now.)