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Hope that your weekend of happy fun times is all the happier because it begins with this week’s top comment:

“All hail Martine! Plumber’s apprentice to Dracula!” –Artist formerly known as Ben

And these runners up are also fun!

“Yes, this is the first time we’ve had sex where you weren’t thinking of your dead wife, so I thought for a change that I would bring her up … so, are you thinking of her now?” –pugfuggly

“I love the sad, sad picture of Snuffy on that poster. He took his hat off and Lukey took a picture of his hangdog expression to commemorate the occasion. Lukey is kind of a dick.” –Faoladh

“If the tongue-waggin’, droopy boob scenes we see in Snuffy Smith are representative of the strip’s whole universe, then I doubt that there are any cute cat uploaders because there is nothing cute whatsoever in the poorly-drawn dystopia that is Hootin’ Holler. Even a baby seal’s mouth would become a yawning maw from which no adorableness can escape when it laughed.” –Neigedens

“Having told the duck all of her dark and terrible secrets Helga proceeded to kill it, cook it, and serve it to Hagar so he could understand her better without the terrible burdens of communication and knowledge.” –NoahSnark

“Look, I’m way beyond being bothered by the implication that Clovis intends to beat his wife for many more years, or the fact that Snuffy finds that hilarious. But Clovis’s facial expression in the last panel is fucking inexcusable. He looks like the world’s ugliest sea lion getting ready to perform cunnilingus on the devil.” –Doctor Handsome

“Les is a success at last! If only he had another book in him to keep the momentum going. What else could he Frey-fake-memoir about? No, gotta keep it real, since the Three Cups of Tea scandal they’re really checking. Too bad someone else close to Les isn’t dying. Too bad. Too bad. The white screen stares in front of him, mocking him with its emptiness. The kitchen knives call his name from their drawers. So many people in Westview in pain, and Les could fix it all. They’d thank him, really, especially when they get movies made about them. Cayla wants to be as famous as Lisa, doesn’t she? Of course she does. Of course. Go get those knives, Les. It’s all for the sake of art.” –MaryAnnTheRest

“I love Snuffy Smith’s reaction in the final panel there, clutching his head in disbelief. ‘Haw haw haw! Fifteen! You said fifteen! That’s definitely a thing that you said! … Okay, I dunno what a fifteen is.'” –Tophat

I hope we can remain friends! If I’m lucky, she’ll say ‘yes’ when I get down on one knee and offer her this diamond friendship ring. And I hope she’ll accept my offer to move into my place, since I’ve really been struggling with the rent since my last roommate moved out and it’d be great to have a new roomie that I’m already friends with. You know, I don’t see how this breakup could go wrong at all!” –Krazy Kat

“Spider-Man is thinking, ‘I want to erect a monument to this conversation … where can I find a grade of marble boring enough?'” –Kibo

“Did you think the vampires in Twilight were awful? Just wait; Spider-Man features vampires who can’t even successfully turn into vampires. They can only melodramatically shrug at their inability to become vampires and then argue about it. On the other hand, they do have horrifically over-sized eyebrows.” –Alan’s Addiction

“What’s that? They want to make Lisa’s Story into a movie? And hire me as a consultant? Thanks, but I just got laid for the first time since she died and … I guess I’m just not that obsessed by it any more. Ok? Thanks — bye.” –cheech wizard

“I need a C-band uplink, gentleman. I shall also require some Grey Poupon.” –Ned Ryerson

“‘OH MARGO. I’M GOING TO CRY.’ ‘YES.’ ‘THIS IS DEFINITELY HOW THE HU-MANS PORTRAY EMOTION.’ ‘YES.’ ‘WE ARE NOT AT ALL UNFEELING SPACE ROBOTS FROM THE BEYOND.’ ‘NO.'” –commodorejohn

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