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You want this week’s top comment? You got it, buddy.

“I’m actually super-impressed with the couch. Yes, it’s drawn super-low and weird… but the cartoonist OWNS that by making the guy look super-uncomfortable with his knees drawn up high, and an awkward look on his face. It’s not that it’s a badly-drawn couch, it’s a well-drawn bad couch.” –RoofPig

You want runners up? You got those too!

“How is Mason Jarre not being sarcastic here? ‘Hi folks, I’m the star of a billion-dollar space action franchise, and I’m on my way to a bangin’ wrap party for some Lifetime Channel cancer porn I shot during my lunch breaks! And look who’s with me! The writer who gets the based on credit! Not even the actual screenwriter! I was going to show you the production assistant, but he’s working his other job at Starbucks.’” –Banana Jr. 6000

“Hmm. So if a nationally syndicated comic strip is acknowledging Instagram, that must mean it became irrelevant at least a year ago, maybe more. Sorry you had to find out this way, Instagram.” –Joe Blevins

“‘Mason Fans?’ Mason Fans?! JARRE HEADS” –Dan

“Oh, snap! I hope Bemidji’s social media team is ready for the flood of interest generated by this wild twist!” –Powers

“We’ve survived a fire and a plague making this movie! But we refused to take the hint that the Almighty did not want this movie to exist and we produced it anyway! May God have mercy of all our souls!” –Ettorre

“It really seems like Crankshaft wouldn’t be buying checks online. I picture him going to the bank bright and early instead, intent on paying for his new checks with one of the last of his old checks. Because banking online? That’s how they getcha.” –made of wince

“Wilbur, I would wager any amount of money that Kitney Houston over there is a– No, wait, that Whitney Mewston over there is a– NO WAIT HERE IT IS, that Dolly Purrton, thank God I got that out of my system, that Dolly Purrton over there is a better singer than you.” –els

“Investigate every possible cause or motivation behind the fire? He should start with the fire’s acting coach. ‘Okay, your motivation in this scene is that you really, really hate this B&B. The sheets were only 200 thread count, and the French toast was soggy.’” –Peanut Gallery

“So the presumably deep-pocketed mayor just accused them, without evidence, of being arsonists on live television. Sam and Abbey would sue, but that might lead to courtroom drama, and we all know a strip called Judge Parker can’t have any of that.” –Where’s Rocky?

“For once the weird empty aesthetic of this strip actually works in its favor, in that those two definitely look like they’re having messed-up hallucinations in a crack den.” –pugfuggly

“Obviously Wilbur deserves to die, but also, what kind of idiot thinks ‘This cat is making too much noise, I will lock it up in a room where it doesn’t want to be?’ Has he ever met a cat?” –matt+w

“Very unfortunate that this Crankshaft strip happened to go out the week Afghanistan fell, since any other week a guy cracking wise at scenes of death and devastation in a faraway land would presumably be in perfectly good taste.” –Schroduck

“Cats kill by going for the neck. Normally they try to break the spinal cord, but all Libby needs to do is tear through Wilbur’s larynx and she will have killed all his hopes and dreams.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“My only fear here is that Wilbur is going to learn a lesson at the end of all this. I don’t want him to learn a lesson. Like God hardening the pharaoh’s heart for the final plagues I want the fullness of justice to be brought down on him.” –BananaSam

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