Metapost: Merry Christmas to all! And to all a good truncated COTW
Post Content
Folks! It is once again time for me to take my long winter’s nap, by which I mean a week or so off from posting on the site so that you can take a break from reading and spend time with your families (or with your bookie or with cable TV, I don’t care what you do). Do not fear, however: I will return after the New Year to let you know how badly Dawn’s date goes, and will keep on blogging in 2025 and for all eternity.
In the meantime, though, here’s your top comment of the past few days, something to tide you over:
“Like a toothache! Not that we have to worry about that! [they all open their mouths wide to reveal their weird gummy maws]” –pugfuggly
And here are your runners up! Very funny!
“Wait, Yeet-Saying Teen’s name is Oscar? That’s not right at all. If the only thing he can say is ‘yeet,’ his name has to be Yeet. Have these people never seen Grape Ape?” –Peanut Gallery
“Over ‘winter break’? Hootin’ Holler was the last place I expected meek surrender in the War on Christmas.” –matt w
“Disney may have lost their joint trademark with WB on ‘superhero,’ but their back-up plan is that if they publish a comic book called Comic Book, maybe they can trademark that.” –Horace Broon
“At least Santa and his old lady appear to spend their year judging Naughty/Nice at Molly Hatchet concerts. They need judging, and not just for being Molly Hatchet fans.” –A Grave Mind
“AUBEE looks like a name you’d see if you asked Midjourney to generate a picture of Santa checking his list.” –ambignostic, on BlueSky
“Dude, the least you could have done is make it rhyme. I’ll get you started: ‘steak’ rhymes with ‘milkshake.’” –Pozzo
“Meanwhile, Blondie is reading out loud from 50 Shades of Grey on her iPad, and also using ChatGPT to change half the original text to descriptions of food. It takes a lot to get things going in bed when you’re a couple of long-married weirdos, but darn it, they’re trying!” –BigTed
“No, no, Dawn! Pale mauve doesn’t go well with red flags.” –MKay
“Boring, repetitive, primary purpose is to cause you to seek out distraction from the unpleasantness? It’s the perfect Rex Morgan, M.D., Christmas gift!” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV
Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my tip jar, or back me on Patreon! Thanks to all for your support and readership!
33 replies to “Metapost: Merry Christmas to all! And to all a good truncated COTW”
Merry Christmas, Josh—enjoy your break!
Fifty years ago today, American newspaper readers learned of the Supreme Court’s ruling that Congress cannot limit the President’s clemency power, and the Court also ruled inadmissible a murder confession in Pennsylvania. Meanwhile, President Ford responded to published reports of illegal CIA spying on American citizens, and Communist forces were on the offensive in Viet Nam.
Rex Morgan took the offensive by breaking in a door while a suspect fled out a window, Sam Driver discussed issues regarding a police interrogation, and in Steve Canyon a man was puzzled by his encounter with two Asians who did not conform to his stereotypes.
And G*d bless us — every one!
Merry Mega-Thread Eve, everyone!
Kwanzaaganza Incoming! Warm up the Bots!
@Little Guy: I just realized, Josh hasn’t covered Curtis Kwanzaa this year.
Presuming that the comic even did it this year.
I don’t think any can top “Giant Telepathic Otter” or “Turning everyone into rabbits brought world peace ending all hate/prejudice/arguments/disagreements/sports, religious and political disputes for all eternity”
Merry Christmas all, be well until the new year!
Goodness, I’m on the main float! It’s a Christmas miracle!
Thanks, Josh, and Merry Christmas to all!
@Giant Pondering Otter: I think the Kwanzaa story usually starts on Kwanzaa itself, so two days to go.
Mark Trail Mix: When did Cherry have the Play-dough™ hairstyle installed?
Six Chex: Haven’t the talented chix been splitting the checks with Pumpkin Head Chick? For shame, ladies! Even the Beatles split evenly with Ringo! Admittedly, Ringo never submitted the song “I Don’t Feel Like Writing A Song Today, So My Cat’ll Do It”.
PLEASE DO NOT POST ON THIS THREAD UNLESS YOU ARE COMMENTING ON JOSH’S COTW LIST
Don’t Flash Gordon: “Listen to your lioness” wiser words have never been said!
Sorry for #12,I didn’t see your announcement, Thread Monitor.
Congratulations to pugfuggly and the other food folk on the float/sleigh. Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah to all, although I’m hoping to stop in tomorrow.
@Thread Monitor: You ask us not to comment here unless we’re commenting on Josh’s COTW list. Yet yourself are not commenting on that list. Interesting.
Congrats to pugfuggly and all those
whose throats have not slashed by reindeer hooveswho ride the float! My only problem with the top comment is that I was expecting it to be about Snuffy Smith. Can you imagine the horror when I found out it was a reference to Gasoline Alley?Congrats to all the COTWs, thanks Josh, and a merry Christmas, happy Hanukkah, and excellent year-end to all!
Thanks for a fabulous 2024 romp through the comics, Josh! Enjoy your break! Happy Holidays to all you ‘Mudges—thanks for lightening things every day. God bless us, every one!
BEST CHRISTMAS PRESENT EVER!!!
Happy end-of-year festivities to Josh and his many followers, and looking forward to another year of comic riffin’.
Greetings to all – here are the Scrotes, and now I’m going to watch the Ralphie marathon:
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
BigTed
December 21st, 2024 at 4:51 am Reply
Hi and Lois: Funny, when Linus played a shepherd in his kids’ Christmas pageant, he had lines — the most famous lines in any TV holiday special ever! You know Linus, don’t you, Ditto? Comics character, a little younger than you, but 10 times smarter? That’s right, you’re well aware. Because I see your sister glaring at you, and if that’s not an imitation of a classic Lucy van Pelt fussbudget look, I don’t know what is.
Tabby Lavalamp
December 21st, 2024 at 7:58 am Reply
Maybe the play gets into the good part the Bible leaves out where Mary convinces her husband that they shouldn’t have sex yet, then comes to him later with news of her miracle pregnancy.
Flipper
December 21st, 2024 at 8:22 am Reply
H&L: Ditto could ask his “father” Hi for suggestions on how to play the world’s biggest cuck.
Daisy
December 21st, 2024 at 8:56 am Reply
H&L: Why on earth is Dot so put out? Is she not happy playing the role of one of the Angels of the Annunciation? Did she audition for the role of Mary and flubbed it? Was she denied the role of a shepherd because she’s a girl? (Note to the play producers: there were shepherdesses in ancient times, yo…) Are her costume wings too tight? Is she just fed up with Ditto? SO MANY QUESTIONS!!!
jenna
December 21st, 2024 at 8:57 am Reply
My theory for why Dot cares/looks so upset is that she knows all the other kids are smiling in mockery. “Ditto,” she wants to say, “We’re already known as the wussiest family on the block. For our sweet lord’s sake, show some balls here.”
pugfuggly
December 21st, 2024 at 5:13 am Reply
H&L: Get it? He’s shy! Turns out kids really don’t want to say the darndest thing after all.
MW Dawn and her friend go to one of those hip new ‘open range’ bowling alleys where they don’t bother with stuff like ‘lanes’. There’s just a line of pins right across the opposite wall and you can aim at whichever ones you please.
Hibbleton
December 21st, 2024 at 4:40 am Reply
H&L: Even at his young age, Ditto doesn’t want to be seen as impotent.
MW: Dawn takes new boyfriend to meet her ex Jared and his GF. Hunky guy takes one look at Jared and leaves.
Tells dawn; “Sorry, Honey. There ain’t enough water in the river Jordon to wash that off ya.”
MW: After his fifth gutter ball in a row, background guy tells Cathy to put a bra on.
jroggs
December 21st, 2024 at 4:51 am Reply
MW: Once again, Dawn’s lustful eyes descend upon the nearest male flesh with no attempt at discretion or restraint. If only we could figure out why she can’t maintain any of her romantic relationships.
AhClem
December 21st, 2024 at 6:46 am Reply
MW — Elsewhere in Santa Royale, Mary’s meddle-sense is tingling. “Dawn is attracted to a guy with orange balls? This must be stopped AT ONCE!!”
MKay
December 21st, 2024 at 6:34 am Reply
MW: The budding romance will be cut short when Mr Hunk slips in Dawn’s puddle of drool and his ball lands on his balls.
Maltmash3r
December 21st, 2024 at 5:23 am Reply
MW- if she manages to land this guy, the only reason will be is that all the men of Santa Royale know that the chick with helmet hair is easy
Charterstoned
December 21st, 2024 at 5:02 am Reply
MW: I think Dawn meant to think “HUNG!!”
MW: If only Dawn would turn around, she could exclaim, “Wow…that pink guy is chasing his ball all the way down the bowling lane!”
Unca Bob
December 21st, 2024 at 5:11 am Reply
MW- Clean up in lane 6 stat!
Lord Flatulence
December 21st, 2024 at 5:14 am Reply
@Unca Bob: Dawn is squirting! The lane is compromised! Come quick!
Just John
December 21st, 2024 at 9:06 am Reply
Mary Worth: “DAWN IS ALL HORNT UP … EVACUATE THE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY! … THIS IS NOT A DRILL!! … EVACUATE THE BOWLING ALLEY!!! … RUN IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE!!!! … I REPEAT, DAWN IS ALL HORNT UP!!!1!
E. Norma Stitz
December 21st, 2024 at 9:17 am Reply
MW: We all know June has her issues when it comes to drawing cell phones in use, but give her credit, she can depict a might attractive pair of jugs.
Mikey
December 21st, 2024 at 6:26 am Reply
MW: Dawn’s bowling name is ‘A.Horndog’.
Alter Ego
December 21st, 2024 at 10:02 am Reply
MW – Cathy really shouldn’t stand next to the ball rack like that. Some nearsighted bowler might try to grab a part of her anatomy and hurl it down the lane.
(I’m referring to her huge, round head, of course! Get your mind out of the gutter before it gets run over by Dawn’s bowling ball.)
Poteet
December 21st, 2024 at 9:14 am Reply
MW: The weird noses in MW never fail to fascinate some of us, meaning me. Dawn’s sniffer, which looks so modest in Panel One, is pointed in Panel Two. Yes, pointed, I tellz ya! Look at it! It’s better than having a small potato stuck on her face like her father, but it is still bizarre.
The Quiet Man
December 21st, 2024 at 4:56 am Reply
MW: If this leads to a knock-down, drag-out catfight right there in the bowling alley, with Cathy and Dawn slipping and sliding all over the lane (“I saw him first!”) I will forgive this strip a lot.
JP: Wow, Anchor Lee Marvin just outpissyfaced the whole cast, and it’s only his first appearance!
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
Hibbleton
December 21st, 2024 at 5:38 am Reply
GT: In Milford, pronouncing ‘Hic’ as “Hck” is grounds for arrest for public drunkenness.
ectojazzmage
December 21st, 2024 at 7:39 am Reply
Gil Thorp: I know not to expect a lot from this new Gil Thorp artist, but did they really have to draw the second panel in a way that makes it look like Marty is getting fucked in the ass by the cop?
taig
December 21st, 2024 at 5:42 am Reply
GT: “Yeet?” “Yeet yeet.” “Yeet yeet yeet!” “Yeet yeet yeet yeet yeet Yeet yeet yeet.”
taig
December 21st, 2024 at 5:45 am Reply
FC: “Or do I just say, ‘Hey, beeyotch, where my presents at?’”
Cleveland Mocks
December 21st, 2024 at 5:59 am Reply
RMMD: “Well, I’ve certainly learned my lesson, Doctor Morgan. From now on I’m packin’ heat.”
I speak Jive
December 21st, 2024 at 9:14 am Reply
Rex Morgan – He has no idea why the guys tried to rob him and stabbed him in the attempt. Maybe they were bored and just wanted something to do. However, to be fair, everyone reading this was bored but didn’t go on a robbery spree.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
TheDiva
December 21st, 2024 at 7:53 am Reply
Luann: Look, just get her bath salts. If you’re this oblivious about a woman, you give her bath salts.
Flipper
December 21st, 2024 at 10:26 am Reply
BB: I suppose kudos are in order for the Walkers attempting something artsy, but to me the silhouette looks like the General is about to suckle on Mrs. Halftrack’s giant nipple. Your mileage may vary.
Liam
December 22nd, 2024 at 4:44 am Reply
FC-Ah the portion that was cut out of the New Testament without any debate, the Four Melonheads.
Hibbleton
December 22nd, 2024 at 4:57 am Reply
FC: Jeffy looks forward to eating baby cheeses.
Arabella
December 22nd, 2024 at 7:57 am Reply
FC: So many things wrong here – Mary baking a cake right after giving birth, putting one candle on it when he’s only 0 years old, Joseph managing to keep ice cream frozen. I do like the lamb wearing a party hat – that made me smile.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
nescio
December 22nd, 2024 at 4:30 am Reply
Marvin: “He has pissed so much the house is turning into a yellow void.”
Ettorre
December 22nd, 2024 at 4:31 am Reply
Santa knows that Marvin has been really bad this year, but he’s still bringing him a Lego set, hoping he’ll choke on the small parts
taig
December 22nd, 2024 at 4:44 am Reply
Marvin: Aw, it’s like Toy Story, but with charm replaced by bodily waste.
pugfuggly
December 22nd, 2024 at 4:48 am Reply
Marvin: Do you think that Santa needs more evidence that Marvin is a rotten kid? And by ‘rotten’, I mean smelling of decay.
BigTed
December 22nd, 2024 at 4:49 am Reply
Marvin: An electric robot toy has gone an entire year in Marvin’s room without being shorted out by stray liquids? I think not.
Mary Worth: His name is “Dirk”?! Okay, I’m out.
jroggs
December 22nd, 2024 at 5:04 am Reply
Marvin: Not too surprising that Marvin’s toys don’t know what a Code Blue entails. They’ve only ever had to deal with Code Browns.
MW: Karen Moy is never inefficient; Dirk has only had one day of speaking lines and I already wish him dead. But hey, we have to prop up Jared as a great guy somehow (apparently), and it’s not like Moy knows how to do that by making him likable, so instead everyone else has to be that much worse.
MKay
December 22nd, 2024 at 5:01 am Reply
MW: Dawn is one breath away from telling Dirk all her passwords.
Cleveland Mocks
December 22nd, 2024 at 6:41 am Reply
MW: As Dirk McStudly gets ready to cut another notch in his belt, he muses happily, “Wow, easiest one ever!”
Daisy
December 22nd, 2024 at 9:29 am Reply
MW: Oh Dawn, you simpleton…”Dirk,” if that is really his name, is going to download some nefarious malware on your phone like, say, a tracker app and he will stalk you relentlessly, or maybe he’ll surreptitiously steal your passwords and drain your bank account and your credit cards. Nice catch, girl.
Hibbleton
December 22nd, 2024 at 5:16 am Reply
MW: Dirk has second thoughts when he realizes Dawn has handed him a Pop-tart.
Liam
December 22nd, 2024 at 6:07 am Reply
Dustin-“Sorry to disappoint you kid but Dustin’s sister doesn’t wear underwear.”
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
The Quiet Man
December 23rd, 2024 at 5:28 am Reply
Luann: Ahh, cheapskates and passive-aggressive ingrates! Merry Christmas, you horrible, horrible people!
Tom T.
December 23rd, 2024 at 8:10 am Reply
Luann: The writers really seem to think these free T-shirts are hysterical.
TheDiva
December 23rd, 2024 at 8:25 am Reply
Luann: Cheap bastard. Didn’t even bother to use the colorful Sunday comics for the wrap job.
MW: “Dirk Tandy”? Who is this guy, a character in a late 19th century melodrama? Is Dawn going to end up tied to railroad tracks? (Please let Dawn end up tied to railroad tracks.)
Charterstoned
December 23rd, 2024 at 4:30 am Reply
MW: As Pink Background Lady completely loses control of her frame, a vigilant BOWL attendant quickly activates the gutter guards to stop her careening trajectory across the lanes.
Hibbleton
December 23rd, 2024 at 4:49 am Reply
MW: “Good looking and rich! He’s heir to all that Radio Shack Tandy cash.”
Professor Well Actually
December 23rd, 2024 at 5:31 am Reply
MW: Dirk could hear Dawn’s panties getting wet from a lane away.
Hibbleton
December 23rd, 2024 at 5:35 am Reply
MW: Dawn and Dirk are so smitten with each other they’re standing unawares in the center of the lane. No matter. The rules in this place allow bowlers to run across the lanes sideways.
jroggs
December 23rd, 2024 at 6:27 am Reply
MW: June Brigman understands bowling as well as she understands smartphones, human faces, and the value in not redrawing the same exterior building wall over and over.
Ukulele Ike
December 23rd, 2024 at 6:25 am Reply
MW: “Quick work, Dawn!” I thought it was the male prerogative to treat the women in cheap hooks-ups like meat. Very disheartening to learn ladies can be every bit as shallow and creepy as the bro faction.
Cleveland Mocks
December 23rd, 2024 at 5:23 am Reply
MW: “Drunk woman on lane 18. Repeat, drunk woman on lane 18. Request clean-up.”
MW: “Nice to meet you, Dawn. They call me ‘Dirk the Dirk,’ if you get my shaft, er, drift. And, hey, why don’t you introduce me to your friend there. She’s probably not as easy as you, but she sure is prettier.”
GT: Um, don’t CITIES have police forces and COUNTIES have sheriff’s offices? Or is Milford in Milford County? Also, are criminals in Milford City/County given their own punny chapter titles for some upcoming book or documentary or funny meme? And has the sheriff’s office ever booked anyone with perfectly round fingertips before? Yes, Yes, and Yes. In HenryWorld, all things are possible.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
Tabby Lavalamp
December 23rd, 2024 at 5:44 am Reply
Why is Dagwood reading his CornHub posts out loud to Blondie when she’s just trying to relax with The Comics Curmudgeon at Joshreads dot com before drifting off for the night with dreams of Sam Driver?
BigTed
December 23rd, 2024 at 7:44 am Reply
Blondie: Meanwhile, Blondie is reading out loud from 50 Shades of Grey on her iPad, and also using ChatGPT to change half the original text to descriptions of food. It takes a lot to get things going in bed when you’re a couple of long-married weirdos, but darn it, they’re trying!
Bob Tice
December 23rd, 2024 at 4:51 am Reply
JP:
Sam calls Alan after Ann turns herself in to the police…
[pinching his nose]: “Do you have Prince Albert in a Can?”
TheDiva
December 23rd, 2024 at 7:47 am Reply
JP: Ah, the proud holiday tradition of gritting your teeth and pretending to get along with your family for a couple days!
Banana Jr. 6000
December 23rd, 2024 at 6:28 am Reply
This week’s Crankshaft:
Today: Ralph looks at the video tape that’s already taken several days to get to him.
Tomorrow: Ralph wordlessly looks at the video tape some more.
Wednesday: Ralph wordlessly looks at the video tape again in the first panel. Getting an idea in the second panel, he spots the VCR in the last panel.
Thursday: Ralph wordlessly inserts the tape into the VCR.
Friday: Ralph wordlessly presses Play.
Saturday: Ralph wordlessly sheds a single tear. We are never shown what was on the video tape.
Sunday: Ed Crankshaft causes an unrelated Christmas fiasco involving an incendiary device, a bad pun, and criminal negligence.
Next Monday: Tom Batiuk nominates himself for the Pulitzer Prize.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
erdmann
December 23rd, 2024 at 7:21 am Reply
9c: And the fan service sexual objectification of Brooke’s daughter by Cartoonist Brooke for Fan Brooke continues. Merry Christmas, everyone!
WesCCov
December 23rd, 2024 at 7:04 am Reply
9CL: So it’s an indoor pool?! Did we know that? The divining boards I have experience are extremely rough; besides being unnecessary and impossible, sitting like that that on a diving board would also be very very uncomfortable.
Gladly, the cross-eyed bear
December 23rd, 2024 at 9:43 am Reply
@WesCCov: But then Brooke wouldn’t have been able to draw a twat shot.
Rube
December 23rd, 2024 at 5:56 am Reply
Dustin You know what my mid-twenties son and his friends frequently discuss? That’s right, what to do about their subscriptions to The New Yorker. It’s uncanny how in touch this strip is with the lives of contemporary young people.
BigTed
December 24th, 2024 at 4:32 am Reply
Mary Worth: This guy wants to take her for a first date on Christmas? What a weirdo! I certainly hope this is one of those Hallmark movies where he turns out to be Santa’s son or something, because otherwise it’ll be one of those Lifetime movies where he turns out to be a deranged kidnapper. Or maybe he’ll be both, assuming Dawn is paying for the upgraded cable package.
Noel
December 24th, 2024 at 4:34 am Reply
MW: Too bad we can’t hear the open resentment dripping from Mary’s “Oh, well… congratulations, dear.”
Dennis Jimenez
December 24th, 2024 at 4:36 am Reply
MW – Now, what attire is right for Shakey’s?
pugfuggly
December 24th, 2024 at 4:42 am Reply
MW: You know it’s a hot date when Dawn opens up her all-pink closet! Seriously, did Bazooka Joe start a fashion line?
MKay
December 24th, 2024 at 4:44 am Reply
MW: No, no, Dawn! Pale mauve doesn’t go well with red flags.
Bob Tice
December 24th, 2024 at 5:05 am Reply
MW:
“It would never occur to me, Mary, to tell this guy that I just met at a bowling alley that, unsurprisingly, I already have traditional plans in place for Christmas dinner, because I’ve elevated self-absorption and tone-deafness to an art form!”
Ettorre
December 24th, 2024 at 5:33 am Reply
“Merry Christmas dad! I’m going to a Christmas date!”
“Merry Christmas, Dawn! I am also going to a Christmas date, then getting my kidney stolen”
“You fear this might happen?”
“No, the lady told me plainly that it is going to happen. But she promised me a smooch before!”
astroboy
December 24th, 2024 at 5:34 am Reply
MW: Dawn and Dirk (Are we stanning them as “Dark?”) can join Saul and Eve at CHINESE RESTAURANT on Christmas.
Schroduck
December 24th, 2024 at 5:47 am Reply
MW: “Save a place at the table for me for next year! But just one place, you get what I’m saying? I’m saying I plan to have a series of wild casual holiday flings with this guy and then dump him before things get serious! Mary, are you still there? Mary? Hello?”
Handsome Harry Backstayge, Idol of a Million Other Women
December 24th, 2024 at 5:55 am Reply
Mary Worth: “Congratulations, Dear. I hope it turns out the way you want!”. Mary is much too refined to use the expression l “get laid.”
ectojazzmage
December 24th, 2024 at 9:20 am Reply
Mary Worth: Oh, man. You can physically FEEL Mary’s seething rage when she hears that Dawn isn’t coming to her Christmas dinner in favor of going on a date. “Oh. Well… I hope you have a good time leaving this poor old woman alone. Making me waste that food I made for you. Have fun sinning with pre-arranged-marriage sex. Slut.”
Artist formerly known as Ben
December 24th, 2024 at 2:00 pm Reply
MW: Dirk wants to have his first date with Dawn on Christmas Day, which is as much of a red flag as you could ask for. Aptly enough, Dawn is picking out a clown suit for the occasion.
jroggs
December 24th, 2024 at 11:18 am Reply
MW: “I hope it turns out the way you want?” What the hell kind of unnatural ominous thing is that to say to someone going on a first date? At least make a Christmas-themed pun out of it, like “I hope you get your stocking stuffed,” or “Make sure Frosty puts on his top hat before sticking his carrot in,” or, for Dawn specifically, “Ho ho ho! …No, I wasn’t doing a Santa laugh, I just wanted to see if you’d appear in my bathroom mirror after I said your name three times.”
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
TheDiva
December 24th, 2024 at 8:35 am Reply
C’shaft: So he’s not even going to watch the damn tape, but just stuffs it in an old stocking as an offering to his deceased loved ones–mostly Timmy, who gets a nice full-color framed photo on the mantle, while Helen is relegated to an old wallet-size Sears studio print crammed into the corner.
JP: “And only one family member in jail. It’s a new record for us!”
Luann: Frank was supposed to be reading the next line, about new-fallen snow and all, but the syndicate deemed it too racy.
jroggs
December 24th, 2024 at 11:18 am Reply
Luann: “I heard a noise, so I went to the window and puked.” Actually, that’s drastically overselling the joke, because at least “puke” and “yark” and “toss cookies” are funnier-sounding ways to reference vomiting, while “throw up” is probably the least amusing option. Not that it matters. Try this stunt with your own little relatives during the holidays; if they’re even paying attention to you instead of running around yelling and bouncing of the walls doing anything else, they’ll probably just be confused and ask you why you stopped reading. Kind of like someone reading Luann for the first time and reaching their first Abrupt Plot Pivot Monday.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
Liam
December 24th, 2024 at 4:40 am Reply
RMMD-Say hello to your new coat hanger!
I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV
December 24th, 2024 at 5:21 am Reply
Rex Morgan, M.D.: “Your stocking stuffers are compression bandages to prevent post-surgery edema and a bedside urinal so you don’t have to get out of bed at night. You can get anything on Amazon!”
Slylock Fox and Comics for Kids: Interesting. In the Animalpocalypse, one shakes with the left hand, the right being reserved for wiping with mice.
Pozzo
December 24th, 2024 at 5:35 am Reply
SFx: I thought for a minute that Santa had mistletoe hanging from his crotch. The big guy’s a playah!
Guillermo el chiclero
December 24th, 2024 at 12:58 pm Reply
FC: Mommy’s stocking is the fishnet hose with leather thigh boot.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
Arabella
December 24th, 2024 at 1:30 pm Reply
A true Plugger bought this year’s gifts last Dec 26 when things went half price. (See also: Valentine candy on Feb 15) Now if he could just remember where he hid them away
Special Scrotal Awards to the Best No. 69 and Beyond of the Week
69. 2+2=7
December 21st, 2024 at 8:35 am Reply
GIL THORP: The cops could tell that Marty Moon was drunk off his ass simply by that bowl cut.
GIL THORP (2): Yo, Holmes, this comic is starting to get wiggety-wiggety-whack, yo!
69. ectojazzmage
December 22nd, 2024 at 8:21 am Reply
Snuffy Smith: Wow, the artist just drew legit Scrooge McDuck in that second panel with no attempt at copyright-concealing antics. I would guess they’re counting on the comics pages being so obscure and unread that nobody even notices what they did and Disney thus won’t sue them into a crater, which is actually a pretty reasonable assumption, sadly.
69. Flipper
December 24th, 2024 at 8:44 am Reply
MW: Ooh la la, looks like Dirk will be seeing pink tonight! (Obligatory post #69)
Thanks to Scratchy Scrotum LXIX for the mention.
Thank you, Scratchy, for the mentions. Wishing everyone a joyous and peaceful holiday, whatever you celebrate.
Thanks, Scratchy, and Happy Holidays to one and all!