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Look, guys. I really did plan to do a bunch of Cryptkeeper-style creepy puns for this post, but it’s actually been a long and stressful week for me, and it’s not really my skill set, so I couldn’t think of any good ones. The one in the headline of this post was all I could come up with and I’m aware it’s subpar. I know I let you down and I’m sorry, but there will always be another Halloween so let’s hope it gets scarier next year. Anyway, there were a lot of great comments from all of you this week, and this one is my favorite.

“Dennis sets up a Jamba Juice in his family’s living room. Menace level: negligible, unless this is the first step in gentrifying their home.” –TheDiva

And are the runners up! I really liked these too. Happy Halloween, everybody!

“There’s something odd about the art in this strip — the weird blackened spotlight background, the couch that suddenly changes — which makes me wonder is this is a dream or something. I think it’s probably Jeff’s dream, seeing as (a) Ed is being nice to him and (b) it’s the kind of dull, clunky interaction that could only come from such a boring mind.” –pugfuggly

“You know how the mark of a good Thai restaurant is that it has a lot of customers who are actually Thai? Well, this restaurant has… no other customers at all. Which is either a sign of a bad restaurant, or that boring oldsters Augie and Summer like to eat dinner at 4 p.m.” –BigTed

“Rex Morgan characters were never meant to express positive emotion through smiles this much. It’s unnatural. Let’s get back to placid, mildly irritated frowns ASAP.” –ectojazzmage

The ‘& family’ after ‘Marvin’ is very threatening! You think this horrible baby is an abomination, a freak accident? Wrong! He comes from a line of horrible people, their genes are everywhere, humanity is already polluted!” –Ettorre”

“Montoni’s and a shit bookstore are the only two semi-profitable businesses in this God-forsaken town, so it makes sense to have a Pizza Monster. There’s probably a Book Ghost, but that only comes around Christmas to do a Christmas Carol homage, by which I mean rip-off with hack puns that lasts two weeks.’” –Buck Ripsnort

“Women be supporting.” –JeffMcm

“In an ironic twist, Dr Jeff can’t recognize Mary’s cognitive decline due to mercury poisoning due to his own cognitive decline due to mercury poisoning.” –Hibbleton

“Well this is a big deal about nothing. Hootin’ Holler’s population has about a dozen teeth between all its residents. Dentist Hyde can go back to the darkest corridors of Doctor Pritchart’s sick mind.” –KMD

“Does Dennis mean ‘Want some, dad?‘ Or does he mean ‘Want some dad?’ Note that we can’t see most of Henry’s body. Who knows which parts of him went into that suspiciously minced meat-looking smoothie? Halloween week is off to a good start.” –Schroduck

“Look at Kudlick’s dead stare. Wait a minute! This abyss! IT GAZES ALSO!” –A Grave Mind

“Dustin’s dad, dude, the dream is dead. Maybe you had a sparkling personality in your youth, but nobody who can communicate with you as you are now would dream of having sex with you, not even your wife who, being Dustin’s mom, is no catch herself. I’m pretty sure you getting an AI girlfriend will be what brings about SkyNet trying to end humanity. Keep an eye out for a man named John Connor, he will be there to end you before it happens.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“Good thing there’s not a very popular movie adaptation of a musical derived from The Wizard of Oz that released last year and just started its big marketing push for its second part. Otherwise today’s Marvin would look pretty silly.” –Justin Lacy, on BlueSky

“I want more for Marvin’s mom. I really do. Not only does she for some reason have to theme her terrible child’s costume around their dog’s — and that’s bad enough, I am genuinely baffled by this decision — but to get a two-question-mark response to the idea that said theme is from one of the most famous movies ever made? To have to look at a face that’s apparently enraged by the idea? Look, Marvin’s dad, two things: one, I do not and will not remember your name, and two, it’s not like she suggested that the costumes be from, like, Gunga Din, take it down about seven notches and buy some fuckin’ silver facepaint before your wife drops your terrible child on your lap and peaces out for good.” –els

“Sorry, vampires were also invented before Marvin was born. Actually, I think 90% of Halloween costumes reference things created before Marvin was born. Marvin will simply have to go dressed as the 6 7 meme.” –Xine Fury

“It’s hilarious that the Shoe team clearly wanted to do a Macbeth Halloween joke, couldn’t think of one, and pivoted to ‘what’s the other play with the skull?’” –Victor Von

“Love to imagine someone checking in on Mary Worth for the first time in a year or two. ‘Okay, let’s see what wacky and awful hijinks Wilbur has be–‘ [squints, frowns]” –Dan

“God, this is awful. Daddy Keane in a defensive crouch behind a tree, the candy lady looking out suspiciously yet contemptuously, the children oblivious, Barfy just happy to waddle along no matter what may come. It’s so awkward when you end your affair with the neighbor!” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“The buckle on Dolly’s witch hat speaks volumes. She’s not your typical witch, she’s a Pilgrim witch. Very clever, very original, she’s been excommunicated from the village and will die of exposure in the Northeastern winter, very tragic.” –Austria

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