Get along, little Chrysomallon squamiferum, and never you roam …
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So ends the Comics Curmudgeon Summer Fundraiser. For more than 20 years, through economic crises, the collapse of print journalism, a global pandemic, and Crock, the generosity of Comics Curmudgeon readers has kept this valuable cultural property alive and thriving. Thank you!
[On the off chance that you missed the fundraiser, you can click here to sneak in a last-minute contribution. I won’t tell anybody!]
Arctic Circle, 8/16/25
The Wild West! Memories came flooding back of endless summer afternoons spent fighting off backyard rustlers with his precious Nichols cap gun, trying and failing again to lasso the dog, plinking cans with his beloved Daisy, then sleeping under the stars, content with his posse and a belly full of Mom’s baked beans. Sure, accountancy had given him, Viv, and the kids a good, secure life. But the dream had never died. It took only a wisp of smoke from the grill or distant wail of a train to remind him he had become a settler—that he had settled. And it hurt.
A cowboy! Was it even possible after all this time, dressed in neoprene not buckskin, corralling manganese nodules instead of dogies, foregoing security for the risk and freedom of a new frontier? Gold shone from those hydrothermal vents for a man bold enough to brave the tube worms and claim it. No one would stop him, but did he dare? Instinctively he ran the numbers: mortgage balance, 401(k), the kids’ 529s. No, it wasn’t money he lacked, but courage. And now he could feel it, unfamiliar but welcome, welling up inside him.
Viv wouldn’t understand at first—he had never shared his childhood dream. But she would see the glow in his eyes, feel the newfound strength in his arms, and accept this part of the man she loved. He left his beer half finished and walked into the sun, grinning. He had waited too long. He would live this dream, and no fucking rabbit would tell him it was a sin.
Dick Tracy, 8/16/25
Lakoyle Labs is down at #44 on Tracy’s “Person of Interest” list, but this guy just up and phones the murderer direct. They’d hire him to head the Major Crimes Unit, if he had the chin for it.
Flash Gordon, 8/16/25
Hmm, “footage.” I understand that we’ve not yet figured out terse, digital-specific terms to replace hoary analog coinages like “film” (as a verb), “cut,” “splice,” and “reel.” And it takes a while: consider the evolution of “radio phone” → “car phone” → “mobile phone” → “cell phone” → “mobile” → “smart phone” → “mobile device” → “phone.” But you’d think they’d have it figured out by the time the flying cars showed up.
Well, that’s it for me this time around—guest host tomorrow, and Josh is back on Monday tanned, rested, and ready. I had a wonderful time, thanks! And special thanks to all the generous contributors who keep this site going, year after year.
—Uncle Lumpy
102 replies to “Get along, little Chrysomallon squamiferum, and never you roam …”
Arctic Circle-“They’re all cowboys.” And cue the opening of ‘YMCA’.
Arctic Circle-Rhinestone or midnight cowboys?
Blondie-You’re going to need a bigger boat.
MW-And such a shame there isn’t a lifeguard around to do anything.
FC-“They say that Alcatraz unescapable. Let’s test that theory, Billy, and leave you there.”
Dick Tracy:
“Tracy, why are you wearing that coat and hat when it’s the middle of the summer and it’s nice outside?”
“Listen, it’s part of my trade dress, okay? I’m not just any gumshoe, I’m a stylized gumshoe!”
Flash Gordon:
Mongo only pawn in game of interplanetary life.
RMMD:
“And I want to know all about you. We have a lot of catching up to do! So let’s start our game of catch with you, Cody.”
“Me? Well, because of my unsettled childhood and, now, a rush of emotions about who my actual father really was and all, I’ve developed a dry, sarcastic, subtly humorous way of looking at things. I keep picturing all of Dad’s kids born out of wedlock. Thousands of Dad’s kids, and nobody’s around — nobody big, I mean — except me. And I’m standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody as they start to go over the cliff — I mean if they’re running and they don’t look where they’re going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That’s all I do all day, I’d just be the catcher in the wry and all. I know it’s crazy, but it’s the only thing I’d really like to be.”
“Okaaaaaay, then. I’ll see you to the door, Cody.”
Gasoline Alley: No Corky, people want to work, but your ad is for a cook, not a temp fill in for 1-2 weeks. People are looking for jobs and are willing to work, but they are looking for full time employment.
DT: Going all out = doing basic logical police work?
JP: If the bad guys wanted April dead, by now she is dead or not even in Norway. Did Aksel wander off with the cat?
MW: So will it be Olive saving the mean girl or committing the error of the untrained rescuer getting pulled down by the drowning person. This forces MW to the rescue! (having typed this, of course this is what will happen) Meanwhile where is the professional lifeguard? Must be showing off twirling that rescue can for admirers.
Phantom: “Gotta hand it to you General. Digging into the muckpeople’s CV, their hopes and dreams works, aided of course by your long reign of brutal physical oppression and reprisal and the meagre diet. Yup, the system works.”
RMMD: RMMD does not have consistent linear time. Sometimes time dilates and what should take a few moments is stretched out into days of strips, and sometimes it contracts smashing days if not weeks into just one moment. Here we see an example of the latter. Cody, having just met his half sister, is already forming a connection and that bond leads to an outpouring of family secrets and information. Meanwhile her difficult brother adhering to traditional linear consistent time refuses to have anything to do with Cody until he checks him out – like most sane rational people.
Arctic Circle: In most of the world, seabed mining is regulated the International Seabed Authority (ISA) under the United Nations Convention on the Law of the Sea (UNCLOS), which the U.S. has signed but not ratified. In the United States, seabed mining is managed by the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA), governed by the Deep Seabed Hard Mineral Resources Act (DSHMRA) — although that 1980 law may be superseded by a recent executive order by the Trump administration, which was intended to “to advance United States leadership in seabed mineral development.” In other words, the regulations in this industry are quite confusing, but hardly nonexistent. So, um, go get ’em, cowboy — just bring a lot of international lawyers with you, and ignore any silly rabbits.
Mary Worth Mashups: Which special guest star(s) do you like?
Arctic Circle : this gag would work better if the guy was slowly morphing into a cowboy panel-by-panel. Like, he doesn’t even have a flanel shirt in the first panel, but in the second panel he HAS (and a bolo tie), and in the third panel he’s now wearing a ten-gallon hat and is now sporting a big handlebar mustache.
***************
On the Fastrack : …that’s not how a surge protector works. Like, you could have the same visual metaphor by having Dethany refer to herself as a “lightning rod” instead!
**************
Slylock Fox : which image is different? Image 1, because unlike the other two, that’s not an actual baby, but an elephant who’s super into infantilism.
FC: Meanwhile, Thel decides to kill two birds with one stone by feeding PJ at the nearest topless beach.
Yaaay, Turtle Carl time tomorrow! :3
(I presume, unless Uncle Lumpy is referring to another user like Ukulele Ike or Baja which would be neat too)
FG: What’s keeping the scrybot from floating off into space?
Blondie: The venus rings on Dagwood’s neck make the animation easier by producing a natural disconnect between the head and the body but come on. In P2, Dag’s head is barely pasted onto his neck. Toddlers with stickers can do a better job.
MW: Mary has decided that her time is more useful in doing a recap. She’s already planning out some great exaggeration for Olive’s parents about how she tried so valiantly to save their daughter and failed. Now her mind is going to what dress she should wear for the funeral and the parade in her honor.
Arctic Circle: I never saw the Arctic Circle animals in proximity to a human before, so I just assumed for years that the rabbit was well, the size of a rabbit, not a freaking huge human-sized one.
I’m not complaining though.
@Baja Gaijin: Claude Manx had me chortling but I don’t really know why xD
RMMD: Cody’s sister looks an awful lot like Sarah. Spuds got around it seems.
MW: Moy’s idea of exposition is to just have Mary stand there narrating events to herself as they unfold. The next line had better be “And the LIFEGUARD has had a HEART ATTACK.”
Realistically, Olive’s attempt at rescuing Little Orphan Knockoff would lead to both girls needing to be rescued since swimming lessons aren’t exactly going to help when currents and tides are involved. You think Moy would know this but considering her outdated and frankly insulting views of mental health, it’s surprising that she lets the women get out of the house or even wear pants.
Rhymes With Orange: Meanwhile, opening time at the OOZ.
FRAZZ: First time I’ve heard a teacher express jealousy over a janitor. Don’t give in, Ms. Olson! Whip his frazz on Wednesday!
FG: so much for having a getting a nice inflight nap.
GA: enough already! Try recruiting with more than a newspaper ad. Ser Jump Start.
@Activist:
On Frazz : I hate how this storyline has been going. For a split-second, at the beginning, it felt like it was going to be about Frazz having to spend an entire month (if not more) inactive due to having been injured, and having to cope with being inactive like the people he constantly denigrates, but no, it turned into about praising Frazz for being the pinnacle of physical activity, even while injured.
…At least it looks like they’re gearing up to have Mrs Olsen WIN the race (while maintaining her “bad guy” role by being whiny and unwilling and resentful about it)…
ARCTIC CIRCLE: Couldn’t an eco-concerned talking penguin and rabbit do better to get press than to accost random schleps in bars?
Lockhorns: Really unnerved by how this strip just emphasises the nurse’s curviness. I really truly thought we were meant to understand that Leroy just had hospital bed sex with her right in front of Loretta.
@The Rambling Otter: maybe an Arctic Hare? They’re almost a meter long so it’s less of an exaggeration
Crank “… now, with the valuation of sports memorabilia, and today’s tariff chart, that works out to a fee of… I hope you have a high credit limit, sir”
GT: “Didn’t you hear her? She admires you! Obviously she’s nuts. I bet we can low ball her salary. Maybe she can teach Home Ec.”
Today’s Pluggers submitter is our own White Rabbit.
Major colorist fail in today’s Peanuts Begins.
Meanwhile, in Rex Morgan MILF Diver, it looks like she is trying to determine if the familial lineage is far enough apart that they can boink.
MW Chiming in about why isn’t Mary alerting the lifeguard?!!. First, even if Olive is an excellent swimmer, the more help the better (I recall one happily successful riptide rescue story where bystanders got a freakin’ shore-to-sandbar line of boarders / swimmers / standing in shallower bits to get to a couple of kids swept way out). Second, if the victim is flailing it’s pretty dangerous if you have to grab the victim and not just assist / advise a lucid kid to swim parallel to the shore to get free of the current – the more training the better, a similarly-sized untrained person is at a lot more risk than the trained, bigger lifeguard we saw (hallelujah when it works and absolutely run out when that’s the best option, but there are cases when the rescuer drowns as well).
But now it’s on “who does the rescuing” – my bet is still Olive is the solo hero and against all teen bully logic she will become popular and respected among these school kids and then her entire peer group.
MT “If you hadn’t built this resort so close to their habitat” – so where were you, Mark, during any rezoning / environmental impact hearings? The wildest parts of the USA are still regulated, nobody just plops down construction equipment and starts building.
@treetown Judge Parker: Ah, but these are patented Hollywood Spy Thriller Bad Guys! They don’t simply kill their intended victim, there’s no fun in that! Instead they will keep her tied up in a “super secret undisclosed location” while they browbeat her and twirl their metaphorical mustaches about how “no one will ever find her” and “we’re in total control!” (complete with your standard evil cackling) and only when they get tired of that will they then decide to kill her.
Of course, that has given the Designated Good Guys (Sophie and Reena) time to figure out their evil scheme and come dramatically crashing through the door to the rescue, guns a-blazing, just in the nick of time, all of their bullets finding their mark while the HSTBGs suddenly find their guns pull just a *little* bit to the right so that all of their bullets go whizzing harmlessly by. April, as a DGG, will join in the fun too, having freed herself long before the cavalry arrived but feigned helplessness so that she could dramatically burst out of her bonds when the Chief HSTBG (in this case Pavel Jr.) came to ‘finish her off’ while the DGGs were working their way through the Expendable Goons.
“You shoulda got me the decaf!” April will snarl as she beats Pavel Jr. to a pulp before snapping his neck.
To counterpoint this triumphant moment however Sophie, as the white DGG, will be cradling the body of Reena who, as the Person of Color DGG, heroically ‘sacrificed herself’ to protect her fellow DGG.
Whaddya think, sirs?
@Baja Gaijin:
Sadly Olive’s gifts missed the drowning girl.
@The Quiet Man: I think you have a promising future as a Hollywood scriptwriter and/or too much time on your hands.
Thanks for keeping things going, Uncle Lumpy!
I sense a visit from Turtle Carl!
FC: “Billy. Billy! Do you see luau girls handing out leis over there? Do you see palm trees? Do you see a pig on a spit roasting over an open flame? Why the HELL did you think that was Hawaii?”
MW: “What will I tell her parents when she drowns? I wonder if there’s a way I can blame Wilbur for this.”
Dustin: This was actually an OK strip. There, I said it.
Arctic Circle: “No, you silly penguin, I was trying to get him to walk away from his glass of delicious, delicious carrot juice, which I have now accomplished.” [gulping noises] “Ah, humans. Never stop believing in your dreams.”
Luann: I’d rather go to Shell Beach, thank you very much.
CS: The customs guy is smirking because he knows ICE is going to take the ball away from Cranky.
9CL: How heartworming…
@Baja Gaijin: Falling Air Conditioner is my favorite!
Crankshaft goes through American customs: “Sir, what the hell is LCF? Are you sure that’s a real football?”
Lockhorns: Loretta’s been waiting for decades. Tonight she finally gets to be the Angel of Death.
“Nobody wants to work”? Unless the next few entries take an incredible twist, Gasoline Alley can fuck all the way off.
“Pluggers use deodorant only because they are particularly susceptible to anti-perspirant buildup on their underarm hair.”
Gotta give Blondie credit for the setup and payoff today.
BG&SS: Loweezy is running? Applause for the deft nod to David Mamet’s 1988 play “Speed-the-Plow”.
FC: “That’s where the man your Daddy voted for wants to put the woman who cleans the bathrooms in your school.”
@taig: Knowing Mary, she would also blame Olive’s parents because they left her in Mary’s care so they could fornicate instead of being a sexless married couple sleeping in separate beds.
Better late, etc: Thanks to our host, who I hope is enjoying the time away, kudos for Baja and Scratchy & claps to all those named, and I appreciate Scratchy giving me scrotes.
@Needless Exposition: That would be so Mary.
Dick Tracy: I want to give Mr. Square in panel three 8/10 in glowering Reagan-era The Man menace vibes, but his three piece suit is all kinds of confused. No buttons on the vest? Actual cuffs on the suit jacket, with Dagwood-sized buttons? 3/10, get back to Brooks Brothers where you belong.
@I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV: He still scores better than Dick’s workplace, which is evidently infested with LICE.
@taig:Dustin:
Oh DustDad must have finally kicked the bucket. Neat.
Don Abundio, translated:
“Dirty… clean… mostly clean… mostly dirty…”
“Dirty… dirty… dirty… dirty… dirty… dirty…”
Thank you for entertaining us with your brilliant commentary, Uncle Lumpy!
In the meantime the comics lumber on…
@taig: Every time I think about Mary and Wilbur accepting responsibility, this comes to mind. Except Homer has actually shown more responsibility than either of those two combined despite his decades of negligent incompetence.
@The Quiet Man: s
Superb. Sadly familiar which means it will certainly be greenlit and produced. One small note have the surviving DGG at the end scream “Pavel Jr!!!!” Like McBain did when his pal was killed by Mendoza.
@teenchy: #11
Magic? I mean, magnets? :-)
@Baja Gaijin: #7
Love ‘em all! Only missing Wilbur and his endearing quirks stuffed into a tight black Speedo!!!
Yes, a landline speaker phone is a dangerous weapon. Imagine a populace able to communicate over distances without being tracked, with no way to mine their data and sell it to advertisers. I shudder at the implications.
@50 Daisy: I think we’ve not had enough respite from Mr. Weston, especially a minimally-clad little Wilbur.
Thanks as always to Uncle Lumpy for his guest hosting!
AC: One of the most interesting and unsettling books I’ve read in the past couple years is Jesus and John Wayne. It chronicles the rise of Evangelical Christianity in the United States, which idealizes not unstinting mercy and compassion but the mythological, Hollywoodized image of the American cowboy: a rough, rugged individual, slow of speech and quick of action, standing against the forces of chaos and lawlessness and needing assistance from no man or government entity. (That one of biggest proponents of this mentality began his career as a film actor is likely not coincidence.) In other words, yes little cartoon rabbit, this was exactly the wrong tactic to get your beer-swilling barfly to care about the environment.
DT: I assume the guy in panel three is not a cop, but some businessman of as-yet-undetermined legitimacy who also has some hand in the Lakoyle Labs’ financial woes and will therefore be the next potential victim of our lesbian scientists. Damn, those ladies are in deep. I would think that “super-deadly taser gun” would have military contractors, black market weapons dealers, and Dick Tracy himself beating a path to their door; maybe they need to work on their funding or SEO reach.
FG: I haven’t been keeping up with Flash Gordon; is Ming still a shameless Yellow Peril caricature or have they walked that back?
@TheDiva: Their marketing funding, I mean. Obviously general accounting is not their strong suit.
@taig: I’m not usually a fan of toilet humour, but yeah.
The only other time I had laughed at a snot joke, was in a videogame where this massive continent is in the shape of a dragon, you can find a cave where its nostril would be. Inside the cave is full of gold ore deposits.
Subtle, and maybe coincidental. But I still found it clever.
@TheDiva:
On Flash Gordon : it’s sidestepping the whole hullaballoo about Ming the Merciless by having him be SUPER-DEAD, and a bunch of earlier storylines was about the fallout of how Mongo’s society adapted to him being gone (read : a disappointingly high number of Flash’s allies were only being “good guys” because they wanted Ming gone, and saw his absence as the opportunity to try to install THEMSELVES as the Big Bad Evil Oppressor of All Mongo
Brian Blessed, say it ain’t so!)Or so I think, I haven’t been studiously following this strip (even though it’s been good, really!)
BCN: Going down the rabbit hole (heh) tells me that September and October are traditionally the Corn Moon and Harvest Moon, although the former can also be the Harvest Moon depending on which system you’re using. And that we can expect this odd little saga to continue for at least another month.
C’shaft: Oh God, he is NEVER going to shut up about this, is he?
GT: I admire Dr. Pearl for going for the Iris Apfel look, but it’s not really working for her. She looks like a Harry Potter-themed drag queen whose act has fallen out of favor for obvious reasons.
JP: “Hold on, I need to call the deus ex machina…”
Luann: Oh, I see, Les objects to vacations and relaxation because he thinks they’re girly.
MW: So where is the lifeguard in all this, anyway? Posting red flags further down the beach? Deciding what color of Zinka to put on his nose? Looking up videos of Baywatch on YouTube?
Phantom: “I had my doubts at first, but it does pay to only kidnap really, really stupid people!”
@Anonymous: Well, that’s one way to get rid of entrenched yet outdated stereotypes in your legacy property.
H&L: Lois humbly accepts the Lord’s righteous gift of rain if so be it while Hi rejects the offering for his own selfish pleasures. As suspected, Dot and Ditto are demons who enjoy human conflict.
@I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV: You’re too kind. I banged that out in under ten minutes. I’d never want to be a Hollywood screenwriter, though. In my opinion Hollywood could shut down production altogether, turn what remains of the historic studios and backlots into museums, put all those billions into restoring and preserving the millions of movies and TV shows that already exist, and the world would still have enough entertainment to watch from now until the end of time.
As for too much time on my hands, that’s what an adult life without a steady girlfriend (long story) and 5 years without any sexual contact whatsoever (also a long story) will do to you.
@Treetown: Bwahahahahaha! Yes, and then the sequel would have a scene of Sophie holding a tiny pistol as she tells the bald CIA boss ‘I cannot avenge my partner’s death with this little pea shooter!’
@taig:
You gonna meet the Strangers and practice tuning?
TRUCK EVERLASTING-OK now Cody and Lorna have realized the nasty truth about this jacked up storyline. Ol’ spermbank Spuds was the biological father of Cody,Lorna ,and Jonah. And Lord only knows how many more.
The other thing they have in common is that their Dad was fucking around on (Jonah and Lorna’s) mom with Varla(Cody’s mom. And Truck’s old lady). And so here Cody is.Surprise surprise. Varla must’ve been a real gem. Lie to Cody all his life and bare false witness against Truck. And now Lorna is filling Cody in on how much of a cocksman Spuds really was. Oh well happy holidays!
@Human-eared Dragon: Probably, but I’m really hoping to find my wife.
(Also, I wasn’t sure if that reference was too obscure these days, so yay!)
Mary Wormtounge: The Lifeguard is thinking, “Look at that friendly kid waving at me! Hello yourself, friendly kid! Well, these riptide warning flags aren’t going to put themselves up!”
@TheDiva: 57- I hate to tell cross-eyed Mary this,as she goes jumpin’ in again, but she ain’t no Pamela Anderson.
MARY WORTH: To “understand” this story, y’all need to look at the big picture in a wider context. Remember their conversation a few weeks (months? Who knows how long this arc has been dragging on now) ago? Mary saved Olive way back when, and in this story Olive saved Mary. As a result they are now “even” (although Olive “saved” Mary a few more times so technically…Mary: “We. Are. Even! Got it?”)
Ahem. Anyway, now Olive gets to start the tradition anew with her eventually saving one of the mean girls. Now as established above (and now written in sacred testament in the holy Tao of Worth), this means that the rescued girl now “owes” Olive and has to be friend in order to pay her “debt” to her. (Rescued girl: “Uh, I’m grateful and all, but I don’t think that means I’m forced to….” Mary then grabs the girls hand with a tight smile and a much, much, much tighter grip Mary: “Little one. The. Debt. Will. Be. Paid!” Rescued girl (wincing from a “sudden” pain in her hand and mustering up reluctant enthusiasm): “Er…Olive? I decided that I’m, like, suddenly your BFF now or something. Funny how the timing worked out on that. Um…put ‘er there…er….’bud.””
MARY WORTH (2): Also instead of yelling at Olive, maybe our time would be better spent asking why they put a blind guy in charge of the beach, because judging by the angle of the rescue, the drowning girl should be right in the lifeguard’s field of vision. The chick he’s talking to must have spectacular cans if he doesn’t notice this rather obvious victim.
MARY WORTH (3): And for Pete’s sake people, let’s stop deluding ourselves and entertaining the notion that anyone here is actually going to drown. The wimpy ocean couldn’t even kill off drunk, out-of-shape Wilbur Weston! What chance do you think it would have for someone with powers?
“tanned, rested, and ready”
Sorry, Uncle Lumpy. Josh is a redhead. They don’t tan. At best they pink.
@The Rambling Otter: “The only other time I had laughed at a snot joke, was in a videogame where this massive continent is in the shape of a dragon, you can find a cave where its nostril would be. Inside the cave is full of gold ore deposits.”
That’snot funny.
FG: Ukulele Ike’s tummy brain called it several weeks ago. That scrybot is a worse narc than Dolly Keane.
Dirk Twacy Hollistic Defective : Her name was Lola, she looked up the number and called up the evil lab for her boss.
Arctic Circle: Wow, Uncle Lumpy. Every so often you decide to really strut your stuff, and nobody repeat nobody does it better.
@Guillermo el Chiclero: Tanned, rested,and ready
_________________
Is the world ready for the Fruhlinger/ Reanimated Corpse Of Nixon ticket?
MW- Shouldn’t Olive be using her superpowers to do some serious good in the world? I mean, there’s a lot of real danger in NYC. “Hey, mister, if you walk down that dark alley you’re going to be robbed and shot to death” as opposed to penny-ante “don’t pet the angry dog?” Or, send her down to Orlando to follow Belle around and warn her would-be poisoning victims ahead of time?
But, no. The whiny little narcissist is too busy barging in on some lifeguard’s job so she can be the center of attention as usual.
REX MORGAN M.D.: Yes, what this story desperately needed was more useless background information for more tertiary characters of tertiary characters (Look out Kevin Bacon, because at this point, we are like 15 degrees of separation from Rex Morgan…who already has very little connection to the primary side characters as it is.)
As an aside, I thought Cody already knew the most “relevant” part of the family history already. (Dad’s a deadbeat cheater, brother’s an alienating standoffish jerk, sis is utterly bland and nondescript in typical Rex Morgan M.D. fashion. Bing bang boom, we’re done.) Also, the dad was Truck’s bandmate. Truck could have told him at least some of this information (I mean even if Truck was blissfully unaware he was personally getting cheated on, he would have known full well that Spuds was banging whatever d-list groupies this band could pull left and right. Wouldn’t he have already known this guy had children? Did they not meet each other’s family or talk at all? Was Truck as ridiculously uncommunicative even back then. This is why you’re constantly getting cucked, old man!
@The Quiet Man: I think Reena could be considered the lucky one in your (impressive) script. The actress playing her would be freed from the endless madness and could find better work elsewhere. Reena, as I recall, started out as the Designated Sane Person compared to Sophie, but was dragged downward as the story progressed. And then, poor soul, she found herself staring at April, the dreaded Cursed Blonde Of JP.
This is probably the last time we’ll see Flash Gordon here for a while, so I want to say that, sincerely, I really like the art in panel 2. In fact from what I’ve seen (which consists of today’s strip and the other one here from the other day), Flash has pretty stellar artwork in general.
Phantom: Monday: Patrolwoman Dai goes undercover as a Sexy Librarian.
DT: In his investigation into the source of the mysterious electrical death ray, Bluesuit passes over the Boston barkeeper and the French neo-Impressionist and zeroes in on the Electrical Death Ray Research Laboratory. No wonder Lola calls him “Hawkshaw” behind his back.
RMMD: I don’t miss Rex, and I don’t miss June’s awful hair, nor the weird Morgan children. And Lorna seems to be one of the more sane and stable characters that RMMD has featured. I say let’s follow her and her family until Christmas, at least. We deserve the break.
@The Man With The Plan: Yes, the art is great and the writing is great. WELL, WHY AREN’T YOU READING IT THEN? Geez, it’s right there on the Comics Kingdom/Seattle Times pages, for free gratis.
Monday: After getting the helmet off Edda, Flash checks whether the key also opens the locks on her chastity belt.
“Look, I REALLY need that shower.”
”No, it’s actually much better for me this way. Dale always fucking smells like shampoo and bar soap.”
@astroboy:
Well we have handsome Broadway legend Ken Kensington to protect us from that (Mary feels a sudden stirring sensation “down there” and she doesn’t know why….)
@Guillermo el Chiclero:
Yeah, but “pink, pacified, and primed” doesn’t have the same ring.
@2+2=7:
Ha, she doesn’t even know where!
@astroboy: “ MW- Shouldn’t Olive be using her superpowers to do some serious good in the world? I mean, there’s a lot of real danger in NYC.”
Before falling under Mary’s thumb, Olive apprenticed with Newspaper Spider-Man. All things considered, she’s doing well.
@astroboy: “Hey, mister, if you walk down that dark alley you’re going to be robbed and shot to death”
Are you suggesting that Olive come to the aid of Bruce Wayne’s mom and dad? Lil’ Bruce will end up as another spoiled rich kid and grow up to be Elon Musk!
(Has anyone else here come across this comic strip internet meme? I get a laugh every time I see it:)
The Riddler: “What has holes in it and goes down an alley?”
Batm@n, tears welling up in his eyes: “MY PARENTS….?”
The Riddler: “No! No! It’s a bowling ball! Geez, I’m sorry!!!”
@2+2=7: 74- I just hope Wanda knows what she’s getting into.
Uncle Lumpy,
All the insights, history, poetry you corral and offer to us during Josh’s vacay are incredible. Do you get ideas through out the year, jot them down, research them, just to analyze them when Josh has disappeared? Your year-long efforts are recognized and appreciated.
@teenchy:
#11. Teenchy, good question. Astronauts have cords, does this metallic guy use magnets to stay on board? I tell you, humans are merely an interlude until machines take over.
When the other superheroes ask Olive what her superhero name is, and she replies “Danger-Sensing Girl!” do they all get a superlaugh out of it? Aquaman is like, “This is so cool, I’m not the lamest superhero anymore! I’m-a celebrate by going waterskiing on the backs of some fish!”
@Bob Tice: “Candygram for Mongo!”
@Ukulele Ike: WELL, WHY AREN’T YOU READING IT THEN?
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Needs more animal people.
@Activist: to
#20: this is my bete noir, employers who say they can’t get employees because no one wants to work. Bah, Humbug! Solely posting an ad on social media is not enough as many don’t use it. Solely placing an ad in paper is not enough as many don’t subscribe.
Use both, but primarily go to places where unemployed people meet and talk. And tell them it’s only a two-week gig. Lots of nontraditional employees are looking for work.
@astroboy: When the other superheroes ask Olive what her superhero name is, and she replies “Danger-Sensing Girl!” do they all get a superlaugh out of it?
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Meanwhile Mary promotes herself as Super Meddler To The Superheroes -Fixing Superman’s feelings of abandonment being shot off into space by the ‘Rents, helping Wonder Woman to stay feminine without flaunting herself, helping Newspaper Spiderman with all his well documented problems.
@Schroduck: The hospital gift shop was out of Glamour magazine.
@Baja Gaijin: I like them all. I really couldn’t decide this time.
You’re a Plugger if you’ve been banned by every all you can eat buffet in the county.
Tanned, rested and ready? Josh is the newest new Nixon?
@Activist:
Aw, thank you! No, I don’t prepare too far in advance, except for some of the weekend guest-host art. Josh’s secret lookahead tools (oops) let me work between two and eight days ahead. And I love going down rabbit holes for things like aircraft histories, Canadian football rules, and seabed mining technology.
AC: Don’t read this strip. Is the Flannel Guy a big fan of the cowboy from the Village People?
DT: “I’m willing to get shot with an electro-gun just to feel something.”
@Activist:
#87. Oops, see Daisy said it first and better in #49. Kudos, Daisy.
Blondie: Kind of an iffy move showing Elmo and his friend shirtless, since it reveals they have the same pattern of neck wrinkles as the much older Dagwood. We can only imagine how leaky the nuclear power plant the Bumsteads live near must be.
C-Shaft: Good thing he didn’t say, “Only my genius.” The impact of Crankshaft making an Oscar Wilde reference might have knocked the Earth out of its orbit.
Dustin: Regardless of what fluid you use, a spitball can get you kicked out of the game, so Hayden should learn to keep certain details to himself for a number of reasons.
GT: Of course it’s the applicant who’s the most blatant about kissing Gil’s ass. His boss—I think?—rolls her eyes because she knows it’s obligatory.
JP: I assume that Leah the Reluctant Landlady is dialing up a radio call-in show that dispenses advice to deep cover intelligence agents.
Luann: Assuming that Les was assuming that “Blissful Bay” lies somewhere south of Tiffany’s navel.
@The Man With The Plan:
#76. “Flash has pretty stellar artwork in general”. Indeed, and the specifics are cosmic.!
@97 Artist formerly known as Ben:
I’m not sure if you’re saying you don’t read that strip or warning everyone else not to read the strip.
Either way, I agree with you.
@Sequitur:
Yeah, Josh and I do that so you guys don’t have to. It’s our mission!