Archive: Dick Tracy

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Luann, 7/5/25

Many dads enjoy drinking coffee out of mugs that declare them to be the “World’s Best Dad” or “#1 Dad” or the like, generally purchased for them by their children. Not Frank Degroot, though. The mug he’s holding as he hands out extremely noncommittal advice merely acknowledges the bare fact that he is in fact a father. How does he rank compared to others in similar roles? Well, that’s not for him or his mug to say.

Dick Tracy, 7/5/25

I guess I never really explained the plot of this current Dick Tracy art theft storyline in any detail, huh? Well, it’s wrapping up now, and it turns out the solution to the mystery was “time travel, somehow”. I don’t really feel like getting further into it but I do want to suggest that you use the phrase “Hypocrite! Without this ‘time portal’ you’re nothing!” in your everyday life, because it’s pretty great.

Pluggers, 7/5/25

You’re a plugger if you determine wash day by sense of smell … which you can do very easily, because your sense of smell is very keen, because you’re a dog! You’re a damn dog! Nobody wants to say it out loud, but I’m brave enough to tell the truth about what we’re all looking at! That’s a dog smelling that shirt!

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Slylock Fox, 6/12/25

Years ago, I read a book about the Velvet Revolution in Czechoslovakia, and one of my strongest memories of it is that after the Communist dictatorship had been overthrown, even in their euphoria the leaders of the broad alliance that had pulled off this transformation — which included conservatives and liberals, free marketeers and social democrats, unionists and Czech and Slovak nationalists — began to realize that they would soon be political opponents, but allowed themselves to enjoy the moment of victory together before that turn came. The story of Slylock Fox is in many ways the story of how the animals came into conflict with one another after overthrowing humanity, and how they learned to manage that conflict. But sometimes you get a glimpse into the origins of their society, like the little story captured here. These guys are free, they magically know how to operate a motor vehicle, and they’ve just violently killed and eaten all the zookeepers who’ve been holding them captive their entire lives. They have a world to build, and that’s important, but in some ways it will never get better than it is on this night.

Dick Tracy, 6/12/25

Sam, not to tell you how to do your job, which I assume is disparaging suspects without much evidence, but if the way you want to disparage this suspect is by calling him a drunk, you should be making a little “drinky” gesture in front of your mouth, with your thumb and pinky extended to make it look like your hand is a bottle of liquor. What you’re doing is a “crazy” gesture, which is not the same thing at all!

Gearhead Gertie, 6/12/25

Sorry, Harold, you know I am usually sympathetic to your plight, but how could you possibly be asking this right now. Your wife is named “Gearhead Gertie!” You’ve been married to her for a decade! You know this is the only sport you’re allowed to watch. You know that very well.

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Mother Goose and Grimm, 5/29/25

Look, obviously I’m not asking that a comic strip that deliberately has fun with a character that’s in some ways like a person and in some ways like an animal be 100% realistic or even consistent. I’m just saying that we should acknowledge that a dog telling a dentist “Sometimes I have chunks of human flesh stuck between my teeth” is fairly menacing! Like not in a cute Dennis way, but in a genuine “I attack and seriously wound those who irritate me” way.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 5/29/25

An aging roots country star wearing colorful western gear silently ruminates over his past failures as a husband while contemplating a beige-ish blob of fried (?) diner food he has speared on the end of his fork. Is this the perfectly representative Rex Morgan, M.D., strip? Well, it doesn’t have Rene Belluso trying to pull off some obvious scam, but it also doesn’t have Rex doing any doctor stuff, so it’s pretty close.

Dick Tracy, 5/29/25

“Remember, Sam. People with criminal histories? Criminals. People without criminal histories? Also probably criminals, and talented ones too. Now let’s go down to the courthouse and get arrest warrants for everyone in town, including ourselves.”