“Augie should just explain to Summer that, in accordance with their namesake seasons, she is hot and boring whereas Autumn is cool and interesting.” –Violet

“I choose to believe that the “squawk” box in the last panel is also part of Ian’s dialog.” –Dmsilev

“Ok, that’s all good and well, but why is he eating outside? Turkey farts? Probably turkey farts.” –pugfuggly

“He’s depressed in advance about how much pie he’s going to lose in that beard.” –MKay

“Humpty didn’t crack open his fellow carton-mate, but he did feast on the albumeny innards of the predeceased, a crime so heinous they have no law against it.” –Rex Thrillho, on BlueSky

“Dustin has embraced his inner Crankshaft, God help us all.” –TheSodorViaduct, on BlueSky

“We see these occasional departures where the strip explores the lives of popular nursery rhyme characters. Is the titular Mother Goose telling these stories to entertain children? Or, since we’ve never seen her with any kids, does she make these stories up to ward off children? Probably the latter, right?” –Victor Von

“I’ve never seen an egg-human with such a small face before. Not clear why I find this vaguely unsettling.” –some guy vaguely unsettled by a cartoon of an egg

“That look on Augie’s face is perfect for someone who has tried over and over to explain the concept of a fictional character inspired by a real person. ‘Please don’t ask for details. You said yourself that she’s smart. I don’t want to admit that that’s one of the differences.’” –Nevin, on Patreon

“You got any six-day old food? Does your disgusting filthy restaurant have any meat that’s just been sitting around since last Thursday? I don’t want to go to work tomorrow, and a bit of violent food poisoning would do the job nicely.” –Schroduck

“Listen, when I texted you ‘semiotic theory and chill?’ this is not what I had in mind.” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“I enjoy Dick Tracy helpfully providing a balloon labeled ‘machine gun.’ They need to go the full nine here, though! ‘Dick Tracy’s Hand!’ ‘Cigarette!’ ‘Thinking Cop’s Chin!’ Oh, the possibilities!” –A Grave Mind

“I struggle to believe that cars in the Alice-verse are that expensive. I mean, they’d just be made out of vague abstract shapes like everything else in this comic.” –ectojazzmage

“Well, you’re certainly a plugger if you read your mail while standing by your mailbox, as opposed to, say, walking a few feet into the comfort of your own home where you can sit down; it’s easier to read; there’s a letter opener; etc.” –Bob Tice

“TIRED: Wilbur is bad at raising a pet
WIRED: Ian emerges menacingly from the mist to visit his wrath upon a pet” –Dan

“I’d be more upset about Jeffy pulling her coat down off her neck to ogle her nape. Probably why Thel wears a turtleneck in the house.” –Hibbleton

“Look at that disaster! Wishing well? More like wishing badly!” –Ettorre

“I’m intrigued by Jeffy’s odd facial expression and posture. I can only assume he’s imitating long-dead variety show host Ed Sullivan, which would be spot-on for this strip.” –Joe Blevins

“In an attempt to stay relevant, Heathcliff has adopted Netflix’s strategy of having characters explain everything that’s happening in detail so that viewers can still keep up with the plot while being glued to their phones. Tomorrow’s caption: ‘The stench of rotting meat has attracted the Beings, and we are all in grave danger.’” –Austria

“Isn’t it obvious? Ozob is planning on creating hybrid clown/vampire car technology. When you open the door, infinite vampires pour out and usher in a new age of darkness and despair for the world. A world full of despair is the ultimate bull market in the business of clowning!” –RoofPig, on Patreon

“Interesting choice of quote in the throwaway panel. I’m assuming this is about Toby not carrying the burden of the past (i.e., the horrible conditions her bird escaped from) or worrying about the madness of the future (Ian absolutely losing it when he comes back to an apartment strewn with sunflower shells and bird shit).” –pugfuggly

“If that coffee spout was about six inches lower, the tragedy wouldn’t be that former movie star R2D2 turned to retail, it would be that he turned to sex work.” –Where’s Rocky?

“‘My best friend is leaving!’ As he’s your only friend, you’re technically correct.” –ValdVin

“Sonny has spent the last two weeks trying to keep Toby from seeing the major-for-Santa Royale story about the exotic wildlife on the loose in the news. Hence the steady diet of sitcoms and soap operas. If he stops laughing, the game is up.” –Harmless little bunny

“I’m CRUSHED the artist added ‘Root’ to Dick’s bottle, clearly at the last minute. Dick’s a beer-with-lunch guy, not a $2 bottle soda guy! Christ, next you’ll tell me he voted for Mondale!” –A Grave Mind

“This storyline could go two ways and the suspense is not killing me. Toby could fall deeper into the delusion that Sunny is the lone survivor of his South American species and on arrival in another continent has gained super powers, or the trauma of the truck crash will build up an insufferable ennui in his soul leading to a premature death and funeral that all of Charterstone must attend.” –SabeHombre

“How far off is the panel where a plugger is depicted enjoying his bidet? Really sorry for sharing this thought (and, indeed, for having it).” –Kyle

“Perhaps Ian has quit academe and moved into the lucrative world of parrot smuggling, which would explain his month-long absence at a ‘conference.’ Ever since the crash happened on his watch, he’s been on the run from the cartel who expect to be made whole.” –Charterstone: Dune

“People are criticizing Mary for not understanding that Sunny is just imitating what he sees on television. But me? I commend him for showing more human emotion than any human character in this strip.” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“Abner Kadaver is such a good pun name. It’s multifaceted. I’m focusing solely on that to avoid thinking about Blondie and Dagwood’s sex life.” –Austria

“I love how this guy is adopting the language of art criticism to discuss Ozob’s silly car customizations. ‘Ozob’s breakout work, Vampire Car, signaled a shift in approach from the solemn, if covertly ironic, form of automotive menace typified by Stephen King’s Christine, to an overtly cartoonish aesthetic drawing on influences that range from monster truck rallies to The Munsters’ Munster Koach. Critics remain divided as to whether this shift represents camp, or even pandering, versus a clever inversion in which postmodernist technique is recruited into the service of a critique of postmodernism itself.’” –Peanut Gallery

“The eternal recurrence of Crock reruns means that not only did newspapers (note to self: check if there are still newspapers) run this strip today, but also fifteen years ago, without noticing that it was about cannibalism and the joke made no sense. Nobody is watching, cartoonists! Go wild!” –matt w

“I might try this as a motivator in the morning. Just look at myself in the mirror and remind myself of the benefits of being a mammal. ‘One good thing about having a bony endoskeleton is I don’t need to moult as I grow,’ ‘One good thing about having skin is that I don’t need to live in a pool of nutrients,’ ‘One good thing about having external genitalia is that I don’t have to package my sperm into a sharp calcified dart that pierces my skin while I’m simultaneously being pierced by my partner’s own calcified sperm dart,’ etc.” –Schroduck

“I don’t see a can of beer next to Thirsty. I call fake.” –Bob Tice

“Shoe is a purple martin, whose diet consists primarily of bugs. The Perfesser, meanwhile, is an osprey, and although he’s primarily a pescatarian he will hunt his fellow birds if he needs to — for example, to take out the galliforms his boss is threatening to replace him with.” –TheDiva

“When you consider the dating scene in Shoe, those eggs are unfertilized, anyway.” –Hibbleton

“The good news is, birds actually will eat their own eggs to recoup calcium so Shoe is accurate. The bad news is, well, everything I just said.” –Library Seraph

“Since the record sale seems to have held up for five years, it might have been a manifestation of COVID asset mania. No doubt Andy lost a packet on shares in a crypto Pigeoncoin and has been futilely attempting to recoup his investment ever since.” –But What Do I Know?

“Shoe is talking mad shit for someone within boiling hot coffee range.” –ectojazzmage

“Steve, I accidentally ordered too many birdcages. Try to upsell any customer who comes in to buy bird food. Especially if they bring their bird in with them!” –Weaselboy

“Yes, this is a convoluted set-up, one requiring that Ed and Ralph play a game they’ve never shown any interest in at a community center they’ve never been shown attending and the twins to also be at the same community center they’ve never been shown attending and having nothing better to do either there or elsewhere, but all of that doesn’t matter because the punchline just isn’t that good.” –TheDiva

“Maybe the animal people are just hard of hearing. Even though Ma Barker is loudly complaining about the scam clam to Slylock Fox a mere two feet away, people are still lining up to give away their money.” –Guts Dozier

“I know how frustrating that can be. That’s why I switched to ‘Organ Blender’ hollowpoint rounds.” –RogerBW

“New Bird Lady gets all the attention here, but Roz tells a whole story with those bored, sad eyes. This is not the first time she’s met someone who thought they finally killed Shoe. It seems to be a regular occurrence. Now Roz is going to have to help this lady work through her trauma and grief, even though no one in this town tips over 15%.” –Nevin, on Patreon

“I for one hope the Ghost Cat is precisely what their name indicates: the spirit of a normal house cat whose freedom from earthly bonds allows them to achieve hitherto undreamed-of levels of idleness.” –Hergen

“With a lifespan of 50 to 70 years, that parrot will easily outlive Ian, and will probably outlive Toby. And oh, the stories it will have to tell. The boring, tedious stories. Okay, maybe it won’t outlive them thanks to an accident where it flies into a window in a desperate attempt at sweet freedom. –Tabby Lavalamp

“I like the little touches that Chip brings time that outfit, like keeping that tie super loose. He’s not just grandpa, he’s drunk grandpa!” –pugfuggly

“Sincere kudos to the Dennis the Menace artist who kept everything about the art generic 1950s, except for updating the light switch to a touchpad dimmer. A+, way to let us know you’re still in the game, buddy!” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“‘Now, when Ozob broke into that auto body shop, did he take anything?’ ‘Well, as you can see from today’s first panel, that’s kind of a gray area!’” –Bob Tice

“We Love Pets is having its annual bone sale! Time to stock up.” –Everything Is Better With Monkeys

“I got it … in normal human speech ‘bald’ often comes out as ‘ball,’ with the d sound buried, as few people really pop that final consonant, and in this context of buying meat near thanksgiving, particularly after the word ‘butter,’ I just assumed he’d actually said ‘butterball.’ The confusion would only arise if he had written his request, but if he actually wrote the word down, you might question his cognitive abilities, or consider his written language might have been affected by a stroke. Anyhow, how many pounds?” –Chance

“Half of Gearhead Gertie strips are ‘The death of Dale Earnhardt was the greatest tragedy in human history’ and the other half are ‘lol fast cars go crash.’ It was only a matter of time before the threads got confusingly crossed.” –Schroduck

“Sarge’s newest recruits are his younger self pulled to the present through the timestream, his evil mirror universe doppelganger, and his illegitimate son.” –ectojazzmage

“Is the county CALLED Nearly, or is this a dig? The Almost State Fair. The Not Quite World’s Fair.” –MKay

“Mary brings a third muffin for Toby’s ‘guest’ but after the big reveal realizes that listening devices alone are not enough. It’s time she installed some cameras in Toby’s apartment.” –Hibbleton