“Boy, did I score today, Mary! This extra sandwich was going to be Stanley’s until they hauled him away for criminal negligence!” –Bob Tice

“It’s kind of fascinating how Shoe is so ripe for the furries to take it and run with it, except every character, even extras, looks like three divorces and two packs a day.” –kumquats, on BlueSky

“The table and chairs are from the Dagwood Bumstead ‘Furniture for People with Short Weird Legs’ collection.” –Baja Gaijin

“I love how all the animals are completely invested in this mystery with wide-eyed stares except for the duck on the right who’s thinking, ‘I don’t have time for this shit. I’ve got to attend to my laundry so it doesn’t get incinerated.’” –Weaselboy

“Luann and Bernice are taken to another realm, to become heroic and save the new planet from — that WAS the plot of John Carter, right? I feel stupid for asking, because absolutely nobody saw John Carter. It’s my own fault for shooting for a John Carter reference, really. Anyway, hopefully Luann and Bernice are dead now.” –A Grave Mind

“Bernice just solved the Lament Configuration from Hellraiser, and she and Luann have been transported to the Cenobite realm, a hell of infinite sadomasochistic pain. Compared to the usual level of agonized fumbling youthful sexuality on display in this strip, this will be a sweet relief for them.” –Schroduck

“I’m used to Jamaal’s bald head, no problem. But I’m not sure I will ever get used to his [peers at it again] moustache and beard configuration.” –Poteet

“I’ve learned, Mary, that you can go for a balloon ride, get stranded in a forest, get rescued by the fire department, and go straight to a diner to eat without stopping at home for a shower and nap … and dogs are great.” –Hibbleton

“‘Unexpected things happen. Things we never imagined.’ ‘I can’t even imagine this hot air balloon deflating and crashing,’ thought no one in a hot air balloon.” –Kirk Out

“Kudos to the Pluggers art team! Man-Dog the Dog-Man looks like he’s discovered a new kind of incredibly satisfying full-body fatigue, and he’ll be dozing off to the familiar strains of confused dialogue between Eva Gabor and Pat Butram in no time. Even his chair is patterned like a pair of button-down pajamas. Stellar work, y’all.” –Victor Von

“It really looks like Olive is eating a standard diner sandwich, like tuna or chicken salad or something, and look. After you learn, conclusively, that animals are intelligent sentient creatures capable of language and advanced problem solving, maybe at least consider going vegetarian. Maybe fish are stupider than dogs, I dunno.” –Dan

“I can’t wait til they go on their first Mundane Couples Cruise.” –MKay

“Evidence that the mop is intended to be coded ‘female’: Long, flowing ‘hair’; drinking wine, something men are usually not depicted doing unless it’s a fancy dinner or a pre-20th century setting. Evidence that the mop is intended to be coded ‘male’: Refers to the broom as ‘buddy,’ indicating that this is one guy straight talking another, no attempt to give the mop boobs.” –TheDiva

“I’m loving how much Mary’s recent dialog sounds like ‘I fervently believe that you are gaining control over strong mental powers that would change the world if we understood them, and I’m going to speak about them with the kinds of platitudes that people give when they want to end the conversation.’” –Nevin, on Patreon

“I like how happy Bitsy looks. He’s not in any intestinal distress, he’s going back out for the love of the game (the game being feces).” –pugfuggly

“LOLing at Archie and Veronica’s reaction in the last panel. ‘Wait, removing someone’s glasses can reduce their ability to SEE?! What strange witchcraft is this?’” –Roscoe

“I’d like to know the thought process behind the extra in the first panel. ‘Wait, we can’t actually be promoting glasses-shaming. Let’s include a cute girl with glasses somewhere in the comic. We need to make clear that people with glasses can be attractive, and it’s just Dilton who’s the uggo.’” –Westing1992

“This Wizard of Id becomes really sad when you consider that the people in this land have almost nothing, yet they’re so angry at the king, they’re willing to sacrifice what few possessions they have just to express their displeasure with him. See that brick in panel one? That was someone’s retirement fund. And that pitchfork in panel two? Well, now that farmer has nothing left to leave his children when he dies of cholera.” –Joe Blevins

“Three million dollars! I’m rich! Me, Edgar Grant, right! Let me just move my thumb … What? Edgar Allan Poe? Who the hell is that? And what’s a Zimbabwean dollar worth? Jesus, maybe … if I move my other thumb … it’s unsigned? Nooooo!” –Voshkod

“Saul is over in panel one, pursuing his passion: narrating events to people in real-time, as they unfold.” –Victor Von

“If I hear ‘Electrothanasia Room,’ I’m imagining a mad science dungeon full of crackling spark generators and beds covered in chains and straps. Discovering it’s just an IKEA-furnished conference room with a complimentary buffet of coffee and cookies … well, it makes me regret modernity a little bit.” –Schroduck

“Never mind ‘Plano, Texas is a suburb where the median household income is six figures.’ That ship has sailed. Plano, Texas is so legendarily dedicated to high school football that I, an arrant Yankee, know about it. Why are you, Plano Plugger, falling asleep in front of a prime-time NFL game instead of falling asleep in the (googles) John Clark Stadium stands, like the good lord intended?” –matt w

“I don’t really know who Tess is, but this is obviously the highlight of her day. She was hoping Dick Tracy would barge in during the middle of the meeting. She would have been disappointed if he hadn’t. I’m 99% sure she even practiced a few quips that she might say under these exact circumstances.” –Joe Blevins

“Stanley isn’t quite ready to admit to himself that his plan for ‘suicide by hot air balloon’ isn’t working out. And this is his fifth attempt.” –Guts Dozier

“Editor: ‘You know, some people find your strip a little hard to follow. Maybe you could take an opportunity to reintroduce your characters. You know, who they are, where they’re from…’ Writer of Alice: ‘Sure thing! It’ll be completely clear after this!’” –pugfuggly

“Without the ‘tiny,’ it’s just ‘women sure are nags, right, fellahs?’ With the ‘tiny’ it’s just ‘Snow White, history’s greatest freeloader, never got over her height-ist mentality.’” –Handsome Harry Backstayge, Idol of a Million Other Women

“Mary Worth is a lot more entertaining if you think of each day’s strip being an actual day later, with the rescue team going home each night begging them to please make up their minds on the rescue order by tomorrow.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“B.C. referencing OnlyFans is maybe the shortest turnaround time between something becoming culturally relevant and it being referenced in B.C. I don’t want to think through the implications of this.” –Alec Baker, on BlueSky

“I think she means ‘best in the business’ of rescuing people from atop pine/palm hybrids. Whether balloons are necessary is unclear.” –Hibbleton

“I swear, in all my years at the festival, a balloon crash has never happened! It’s almost as if we had been visited by some bad-luck magnet, who attracts doom wherever she goes! Of course, if there actually was someone like that, I suppose she would try to hide her terrible dark mysticism … for example, by pretending to be someone who predicts awful events, so it wouldn’t seem so strange that she’s present whenever they happen. Of course, such a person could never actually exist … Or could she???” –BigTed

“We’re going to be okay! I am a little concerned about the physics, though. Shouldn’t our combined masses create sufficient inertia to slide us off these pines’ rather thin outer branches? I’m not afraid of falling, in other words, I’m afraid of why we haven’t fallen.” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“WORST person to trust with a pile of cash. He won’t WANT to, but his very Dagwoodness will take him straight to the nearest sandwich shop. And won’t his condiment-smeared face be red at pay-off time!” –MKay

“Anyway, turns out babies cry a lot when you take their medicine from them. The moms don’t like it much either.” –Voshkod

“Saul: ‘Mary! Thank goodness you’re okay!’ Mary: ‘Well, I’ll assume you meant to say Mary! Thank goddess! You’re great! and let this one slide!’” –Ettorre

“‘Drone Store’ is actually a judgment value on the customers. The fact that they sell drones is a coincidence.” –Dan

“Thanks for sending the DOGS? That’s no way to talk about our brave first-responders!” –Lord Flatulence

“…and so much outdoors. Do you know how easy it is for a child to wander off and get lost? Listen to me, Katherine — I’m offering solutions here.” –cheech wizard

“Ah yes, the old story of the charismatic front man* being tempted to leave behind his loyal friends** for a shot at fame and fourtune.***

* nondescript Rex Morgan secondary character
** some guys who have not been given backstories or even names as far as I can recall
*** being a cover act in a dive bar” –TheDiva

“Look, gang, maybe you should be asking multimillionaire jewelry-store owner Kendra Scott for help, instead of a couple of dogs. I mean, they’re nice dogs, but she’s a lot more likely to have a helicopter at her disposal. And she just offered to help — for all we know, taking time off to rescue hot-air balloon enthusiasts from the sides of cliffs is written into her Shark Tank contract.” –BigTed

“If Cody thought that hell was having a half-brother not want anything to do with him, wait until he finds himself playing ‘Drop Kick Me, Jesus’ to a crowd of twenty five drunk hipsters for the thousandth time.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“Dot, it’s because, one day, the prince actually COULD be president! That metaphor got a bit tortured but you get me. I’ll be at Thirsty’s.” –A Grave Mind

“The caller could care less if the jury finds Crock guilty or not guilty of whatever crimes he may have committed. There is no credit card. There is no bank. The caller is making sure Crock is at his desk as the drone comes through the window.” –Hibbleton

“Ditto, you need to get on the phone to your agent. Didn’t they promise they were going to make you ‘the next Bart Simpson’ with your own catchphrase and everything? ‘The strip’s breakout star,’ isn’t that what they said? Well, look at the kind of material you’re actually getting. Not good, dude. Not good.” –Joe Blevins

“I like the tension of the two panel structure. You wish your mom what?!?! Never died? Never got knocked up by a dalmatian and broke up your family? Never bought that hideous taxidermied dog corpse?” –Schroduck

“One of Hagar’s men smiles to hear this witty retort. Another snaps to sudden, ravenous attention, and a third appears to have lost his mouth somewhere between panels one and two. But it’s the two whose expressions don’t change that really seal it for me. They could care less about class struggle, or about literally eating the rich. They’re just there, doing what needs to be done. It could be manning the oars of Hagar’s knarr, it could be some light axe work, whatever. It beats the plow, or getting tossed in the peat bog as a ritual sacrifice, kind of.” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“Every now and again, you see a hint of military reality in Beetle Bailey. Today, they’ve seized the high ground! Good job. The ghosts of Jomini and Clausewitz nod approvingly, while the shades of Patton and Kesselring curse them for not digging in on the reverse slope. High ground’s great, guys, but artillery remains the Queen of Battle, and the sons of Saint Barbara, from Mehmed the Conqueror to Freeman McGilvery to Marshal Zhukov, are slavering to turn your position into a churning sea of mud and flesh.” –Voshkod

“Buick has spent the last several years, and probably millions of dollars, trying to rebrand their cars for younger drivers and along comes Mary Worth to undo all that effort with a single panel. Sorry, Moy and Brigman, but when the GM legal team comes knocking, the ‘younger people will enjoy it ironically’ rationalization that you use on your editors probably won’t work.” –Where’s Rocky?

“I think I see the problem, Henry: it’s backwards.” –pugfuggly

“In Ivory Lana two thugs make a botch
Of their simple assignment to keep the night watch.
Having let their attentiveness slip by a notch
They’re brought down by the Phantom’s robust SHADOW CROTCH!

The Phantom has struck like a snake in the grass
And smacked each of the guards at his center of mass.
For Chuma to somehow escape this morass
He must first overpower his foe’s STRIPEY ASS!

Dai Lu Han’s motorcycle has slowed to a stroll
On the journey to Chuma’s atrocious hellhole
But since Phantom has got the mine under control
She might just as well head back to Jungle Patrol!” –Uncle Lumpy

“I don’t often compliment the Dennis the Menace art, but that is a great depiction of a woman blissfully thinking, ‘I’m going to leave you.’” –matt w

“It’s not that it’s gotten too late for Rex and June — it’s that it might get too late. Of course, it’s never too early to worry about it getting too late.” –Boomer

“Rex and June need to be well-rested and ready to heal when all of the injured rowdies from the reception start staggering/crawling/line-dancing into the clinic.” –MKay

“Do ‘critics’ really say the race cars need to go faster, Gertie? Is there a yearly quota for fiery fatalities that’s somehow not being met? Or, are you projecting your own lust for deadly incendiary mayhem onto these ‘critics?’” –astroboy

“The irony is that the King of Id thought that legalizing weed would mellow out the hordes of angry peasants. Instead, they’ve just added ‘excessive excise tax on cannabis’ to their list of grievances.” –Guts Dozier

“I don’t see Saul or Eve, but wait! Oh, there’s the top of Charterstone roof and the parking lot. I can see my car. To think, we were home all the time and didn’t realize it. My, oh my, now there’s a life lesson for you, Olive. Olive? Olive? Oh, you are already down and almost at the parking lot.” –Kirk Out

“Remember when comic books used to have ads with Spider-Man™ hawking Hostess snack cakes and fruit pies? Well, whichever ad agency has that account has decided the comics idea was good, but the approach needs to be WAY less exciting. You get a big delight mild pleasure in every bite!” –Peanut Gallery