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LOL@JOKES.ZIGGY

Crock, 9/13/11

Usually it’s difficult to impossible to get more than basic plot information out of most of the squiggle-things that make up your average Crock, but I have to admit that the facial expression in panel two of today’s installment really sells the joke for me. Sigfried (side note: did you know that the librarian in Crock is named “Sigfried”? I didn’t! It’s always a joy to realize that the comics still has hidden gems like this to discover) looks genuinely stricken as he confesses his hatred of reading. His hypocrisy must really tear him up inside! It’s either that or, as near as I can tell from the relative heights of the characters in panel one, he’s in agony from standing on his knee-stumps.

Ziggy, 9/13/11

Hello, luddites across the world! Is there piece of modern-day technical wizardry that baffles and terrifies you? Don’t worry, the offending inscrutable character-sequence will be clumsily integrated into a Ziggy joke, for your amusement. Ha ha, take that, “http://,” whatever the hell you are!

22 responses to “LOL@JOKES.ZIGGY”

  1. sporknpork
    September 14th, 2011 at 1:47 am [Reply]

    A visit to the doctor’s office may be the first time Ziggy can appropriately not wear pants.

  2. Noah R.
    September 14th, 2011 at 2:04 am [Reply]

    So Ziggy’s doctor got his degree from The University of Pheonix Online®? Given Ziggy’s probable lack of health insurance, this makes more sense than any of us are willing to give credit for.

  3. Lascauxcaveman
    September 14th, 2011 at 2:29 am [Reply]

    Let’s see, “Crock” equals French Foreign Legion, in colonial Algeria, circa 1890-1920 or so? I wonder if our librarian friend Sigfried is watching his TV via DirectTV satellite or just streaming Netflix stright to his iPad?

    Pretty sure they didn’t have cable out there, back in the day.

  4. TheTJ
    September 14th, 2011 at 3:13 am [Reply]

    …I know that this is a Ziggy comic, and I KNOW the artwork is not supposed to be top notch, but I have to say something. Why exactly is the diploma placed at stomach level in the waiting room?

  5. Doctor Handsome
    September 14th, 2011 at 6:00 am [Reply]

    Ziggy is just now beginning to question the credentials of a proctologist whose office is the back of a U-Haul crossing the Mexican border.

  6. Doctor Handsome
    September 14th, 2011 at 6:36 am [Reply]

    Either that bookmobile is a TARDIS, or it’s just a creepy dude in a crate with a Kindle. Because there’s no way any actual books fit in there.

  7. Jocelyn Knockersbury
    September 14th, 2011 at 6:38 am [Reply]

    Ziggy’s doctor is so poor, he can only afford a single-pencil pocket protector.

  8. Chareth Cutestory
    September 14th, 2011 at 7:00 am [Reply]

    Psshh, The University of http:// is just a safety school for people who couldn’t get into The University of https://!

  9. Mary Worthless
    September 14th, 2011 at 8:05 am [Reply]

    Um, Gina, the government wiped your memory clean and planted false memories of a happy childhood skate boarding your days away with “Bobby”.

    He doesn’t exist.

    Nor do your happy memories.

    You lived in squalor until your dad turned states evidence on the Gottis. The government thought it best to wipe your mind. Agent Hope says thanks for the memories.

  10. Rocky Stoneaxe
    September 14th, 2011 at 8:15 am [Reply]

    @Doctor Handsome (#7): “Stirfry” is actually a renegade Time Lord known as the Master Librarian. His TARDIS is a TT Type 40, Mark 3 Hoveround® Bookmobile, containing every single book published throughout the history of our universe.

  11. Nekrotzar
    September 14th, 2011 at 9:13 am [Reply]

    @Chareth Cutestory (#9):
    “So I said, ‘Is that your self-signed certificate or are you just happy to see me?’ Ho, ho, ho ho. Hey, why aren’t you wearing pants?”

  12. MikeyMike
    September 14th, 2011 at 2:40 pm [Reply]

    Is the universe in Crock familiar with antibiotics? From the lesions on his face, I’d wager that Sigfried the Syphilitic Bookmobile Man appears to be passing around more than worn, old copies of Erma Bombeck.

  13. Little Guy
    September 14th, 2011 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

    The Browser Wars between U of http:// and U of https:// developed into stronger security when the two intereacted.

  14. Crankenstank
    September 14th, 2011 at 3:38 pm [Reply]

    Clearly, Ziggy is in for some major surgery at the hands of his proctologist, which is apparent from the fearful way he says “colon slash slash”. That he has major intestinal woes also now accounts for the lack of pants these many decades.

  15. greghousesgf
    September 14th, 2011 at 3:45 pm [Reply]

    @sporknpork (#1): and the only time.

  16. dale
    September 14th, 2011 at 4:42 pm [Reply]

    Has “Luddite” been totally deprived of its original meaning?

    Now it’s just anyone who doesn’t understand or is afraid of technology, not the possible loss of employment.

  17. Liam
    September 14th, 2011 at 7:06 pm [Reply]

    Ziggy-I feel sorry for Ziggy when he has to go to a doctor worse than Dr. Nick from the Simpsons.

  18. $$$$Westville Oncologist$$$$$
    September 14th, 2011 at 7:45 pm [Reply]

    Ziggy- Oh, so now your choosy about your doctor’s credentials, Mr. “Pantless Unemployed Abomination of Nature”??!! Considering your lack of insurance and money, your lucky you weren’t tossed to the vet!!

  19. $$$$Westville Oncologist$$$$$
    September 14th, 2011 at 8:01 pm [Reply]

    @TheTJ (#4):

    Considering ziggy is probably this guy’s only patient, it seems to be in an appropriate place.

  20. Poteet
    September 15th, 2011 at 12:24 am [Reply]

    @dale (#16): Many kinds of modern-day technical wizardry baffle and terrify me, yet I do not try to smash them. (I have an irrational fear that they’d explode, actually.)

  21. turingcub
    September 15th, 2011 at 11:08 pm [Reply]

    The emoticon “://”, or “double-meh”, is the speech-bubble’s only way of silently expressing its protestation at being uttered by Ziggy every day.

  22. dale
    September 16th, 2011 at 2:52 am [Reply]

    @Poteet (#20):

    They’re more likely to implode than explode, but wear safety glasses.

    If they’re the electrical type that plug into a wall outlet, unplug them first. Use tools with non-conducting handles: those big capacitors can hold a charge.

    Do it outside and downwind of the house. Some of that stuff is toxic.

    Other than that, no problem —- unless you’re smashing other people’s stuff.

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