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Metapost: A very brief note about future live Josh appearances

Readers! Do you live in or near Baltimore? Then perhaps you would like to see me be funny, live and in person! On March 6 I will be serving as monologist for a troupe of Baltimore Improv Group all-stars at Magooby’s Joke House in Timonium; on March 16, I will be performing in Glitteracy, Fluid Movement’s literature-themed variety show, doing a narrated slideshow of comics versions of classic literature, at the 14 Karat Cabaret in downtown Baltimore. More information on both performances can be found on this post on my Tumblr. Hope to see you there!

51 responses to “Metapost: A very brief note about future live Josh appearances”

  1. Lumaca Morente
    February 25th, 2013 at 3:31 pm [Reply]

    Well we certainly don’t want to see any dead Josh Fruhlinger appearances.

  2. Lumaca Morente
    February 25th, 2013 at 3:33 pm [Reply]

    You look like Pasdordan beginning a service. Note that no one in the audience is cracking a smile.

  3. KreatureFeatures
    February 25th, 2013 at 3:49 pm [Reply]

    Stay safe. I hear Kingpin is developing a line of improv-seeking missiles.

  4. Calico
    February 25th, 2013 at 4:02 pm [Reply]

    Re: MW, yes, next she’ll bust out and make Paula Deen’s chicken balls (as featured on the Today Show)! Radical!

  5. commodorejohn
    February 25th, 2013 at 4:04 pm [Reply]

    I dunno, should we be seeking consultation from an unlicensed monologist? Did you even go to college for monology?

  6. Stroker Ace
    February 25th, 2013 at 4:12 pm [Reply]

    The Learning Annex has many classes re: monology.

  7. Sequitur
    February 25th, 2013 at 4:35 pm [Reply]

    Jay Leno: “I’m not a monologist but I play one on TV.”

  8. yaoi huntress earth
    February 25th, 2013 at 4:38 pm [Reply]

    Pibgorn: Brooke, please, please get help.

  9. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    February 25th, 2013 at 4:58 pm [Reply]

  10. commodorejohn
    February 25th, 2013 at 5:04 pm [Reply]

    @yaoi huntress earth (#8): Thirded.

    It’s funny how the more Brooke tries to act like everybody else are the dirty-minded ones, the filthier he winds up looking.

  11. Amos Snarkadder
    February 25th, 2013 at 5:06 pm [Reply]

    Josh, is that an iPad in your hands? You’re Skyping with Luann, aren’t you? You know, her parents are “concerned.”

  12. Huckleberry Fink
    February 25th, 2013 at 5:15 pm [Reply]

    Mark Trail: Even his fellow NAMBLA members are sick and tired of hearing Rod Bassy brag about his “equipment.”

    Dick Tracy: Poor Sweatbox usually strikes out with the ladies. This time is no exception, but at least he made a hit with the TRAIN.

  13. Shrug, on Solo Stage Date
    February 25th, 2013 at 5:15 pm [Reply]

    @Amos Snarkadder (#11):

    “MONOlog? It’s because you’ve only got one log, isn’t it?”

  14. Ratiocinator
    February 25th, 2013 at 5:17 pm [Reply]

    @yaoi huntress earth (#8): I had braced myself for the worst before looking at Pibgorn, so I wasn’t as shocked by that torture porn title on the screen and the implications of it as I may have been otherwise.

    If by “stealing his work” Brooke means plagiarism, who would want to plagiarize Brooke McEldowney of all people?

    If by “stealing his work” Brooke means “making copies of it without buying it”, it’s a webcomic. Webcomics are free. Anybody so inclined can go on a Pibgorn archive binge.

  15. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    February 25th, 2013 at 6:36 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#10): It feels like there ought to be a word for this phenomenon, akin to Muphry’s Law relative to grammar policing. “He who smelt it dealt it” is, I’m afraid, is what currently comes to mind.

  16. Gladly, the cross-eyed bear
    February 25th, 2013 at 7:40 pm [Reply]

    Getting off on fantasies of impaling nubile young women is all well and good if you write and draw it yourself, but if you don’t but enjoy it you’re a squalid little perv. Get some help Brooke, indeed.

  17. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 25th, 2013 at 7:55 pm [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#Y220): Hah! How could I forget?

    William Howard Taft
    Was certainly not daft.
    He replaced the White House bathtub, commode, et cetera,
    To accommodate his embonpoint.

    // Let History judge: Great poem about William Howard Taft, or greatest poem about William Howard Taft.

  18. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 25th, 2013 at 7:57 pm [Reply]

  19. yaoi huntress earth
    February 25th, 2013 at 8:34 pm [Reply]

    @Ratiocinator (#14): The stealing from Roger is a nod to an older arc called, Lena the Terrible, where a nerdy teen (who looks a little like teen-Amos) creates a virtual world. Which straw-nerd is using and hacked into.

  20. commodorejohn
    February 25th, 2013 at 9:16 pm [Reply]

    @yaoi huntress earth (#19): Wait, that was a different arc than this one? I just figured it was still ongoing. I know it started before I picked up Pibgorn and was still running when I dropped it some two or three years later.

  21. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 25th, 2013 at 9:50 pm [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#y225): that would make her a Plugger.

  22. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 25th, 2013 at 9:53 pm [Reply]

    @yaoi huntress earth (#19): can we hope for a hoe to the face in the intermediate future?

  23. Gladly, the cross-eyed bear
    February 25th, 2013 at 9:55 pm [Reply]

    William Howard Taft
    Ate food by the raft
    Down the Patomac
    They came in a fleet
    Bringing bread and beer
    And cheeses and meat.

    “My God!” they’d cry
    At what he ate
    Our very most glutinous
    Chief of State.

  24. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 25th, 2013 at 9:55 pm [Reply]

    left-over coq au vin sauce + bread = heaven.

    *burp*

  25. rhyme thyme
    February 25th, 2013 at 10:00 pm [Reply]

    william howard taft laughed

  26. Gladly, the cross-eyed bear
    February 25th, 2013 at 10:05 pm [Reply]

    Rafts full of oysters
    Rafts full of bacon
    And fresh summer peaches from down around Macon

    Rafts of fresh fish
    And cinnamon bread
    Disappeared into that maw
    In Williams’s head.

    Also, gluttonous. Potomac.

  27. Sequitur
    February 25th, 2013 at 10:30 pm [Reply]

    Mark Trail philosophy.

    Right, Cherry? Rusty?

  28. The Right Venerable Pasdordan
    February 25th, 2013 at 10:30 pm [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#2): They never cracked a smile for me, either. But meh, needs more alb.

  29. The Right Venerable Pasdordan
    February 25th, 2013 at 10:41 pm [Reply]

    @yaoi huntress earth (#19): Whaa? Referencing without explaining a story arc that sounds like it’s at least a couple years old is a terrible practice. Does he want to drive his readers away so he can play misunderstood, maligned genius?

    Oh wait, I just answered my own question.

    Now signing the “get help, Brooke” petition: me.

  30. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 25th, 2013 at 11:45 pm [Reply]

    Fluid Movement? Aren’t they the synchronized urination troupe?

  31. Der Kömmëntätör, Herr Schnärkïnätör
    February 26th, 2013 at 12:30 am [Reply]

    RMMD: Wait, doesn’t that old biddy ALREADY OWN that building?

    And where is this “Junior” charater been hiding? Has anybody even seen him yet? Wasn’t that the whole point of this stupid fucking plot in the first place?

    //This is getting as idiotic as Mark Trail!

  32. Droopy Says
    February 26th, 2013 at 12:39 am [Reply]

    Spiderdick: The missile is not confused. It is heartbroken, you fiends, at the way you toy with its affections. Your only hope is that it enjoys the rough-sex aspects of being smothered!

    Creepy Les: Okay, idiot math teacher, how much did you lose in the Stroke Betting Pool?

    Family Circus: Can vasectomies be made retroactive?

    Mock Travail: Don’t you love that “Later” note separating the first and second panels? You can just see Trail, Blueballs and Rusty going through the ensuing time in silence as they slowly form the idea that there might be something suspicious about . . . tinted windows!

    Mary Mirthless: Nice soup-pouring technique, Mary.

    Pluggers: Pluggers waste money, episode #10,835

    Phantom: The strip wouldn’t load. Well, I can wait until Friday for the Big Reveal about this lion being the one Walker toyed with–Friday? Who am I kidding? We’ll be lucky to get there by Easter.

  33. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 26th, 2013 at 12:49 am [Reply]

    @Gladly, the cross-eyed bear (#26): No, no! Glutinous is good! A poetic metaphor for… after a feast like that, you’d be sticky, gluey, too!

    // And as for the river, well, who elected those snooty geographers, and made them king? Remember, “Poets are the unequivocal legislators of the world,” as Percy Bysshe Camus put it so memorably. Be orgulous!

  34. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 26th, 2013 at 12:57 am [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#2): (Spoiler Alert!)

    For those who won’t be able to make the show, Josh’s monologue:

    “Ye miserable, crawlin’ worms. Are ye here again then? Have ye come like Nimshi, son of Rehoboam, secretly out of your doomed houses, to hear what’s comin’ to ye? Have ye come, old and young, sick and well, matrons and virgins, if there be any virgins amongst you, which is not likely, the world being in the wicked state that it is. Have ye come to hear me tell you of the great, crimson, licking flames of hell fire? Aye! You’ve come, dozens of ye. Like rats to the granary, like field mice when it’s harvest home. And what good will it do ye? You’re all damned! Damned! Do you ever stop to think what that word means? No, you don’t. It means endless, horrifying torment! It means your poor, sinful bodies stretched out on red-hot gridirons, in the nethermost, fiery pit of hell and those demons mocking ye while they waves cooling jellies in front of ye. You know what it’s like when you burn your hand, taking a cake out of the oven, or lighting one of them godless cigarettes? And it stings with a fearful pain, aye? And you run to clap a bit of butter on it to take the pain away, aye? Well, I’ll tell ye, there’ll be no butter in hell!”

    // They were quivering in the aisles, I tell ye! Comedy gold!

  35. Poteet
    February 26th, 2013 at 1:09 am [Reply]

    MT — As my mother used to say, even a blind hog gets an acorn once in a while.

  36. Gladly, the cross-eyed bear
    February 26th, 2013 at 1:11 am [Reply]

    Mary: Yes, he is a bit of a loner! And no, I’m not really his friend. It’s just that someone doesn’t have to be perfect, or my friend, for me to do my minimal duty as a human being, especially when those who live so much closer fail in their obligations.

    Also, notice that Mary’s magic pink container expands when it heats up.

  37. Poteet
    February 26th, 2013 at 1:15 am [Reply]

    GA — I’d be interested in The Right Venerable Pasdordan’s take on this.

  38. Poteet
    February 26th, 2013 at 1:22 am [Reply]

    A3G — What evil spell caused Ruby to gain twenty pounds between panels? Did she do something to offend Margo?

  39. Gladly, the cross-eyed bear
    February 26th, 2013 at 1:30 am [Reply]

    Was Ruby a transsexual before?

  40. Baka Gaijin
    February 26th, 2013 at 2:04 am [Reply]

    Tuesday’s Strips

    Oh Toby, Toby, Toby. Sweet stupid Toby. One “knows” Mary Worth like one “knows” a tornado: unwanted and without warning both come blowing into your life and leave a big mess after they’re gone.

    Right, Bluegill and Mark. It is strange that a man who’s moneymaking activity includes parking in the hot sun for many hours of the day would dark-tint his windows. Very strange indeed.

    Another Mark Musing: Bassy’s got limo tint on his ride to hide the shag carpeting, psychedelic black velvet poster, and bevy of big-titted be-haatches bouncing around on the waterbed.

  41. Baka Gaijin
    February 26th, 2013 at 2:10 am [Reply]

    Who’s the new chick in Apartment 3-G? It can’t be Margo’s mum; she’s got white hair now. It can’t be Mrs. Buckethead-Taser; she’s at a blue plate special in Boca. It can’t be Ruby; there’s only one bow in her hair. Who is it?

    Leroy and Loretta Lockhorn found the only buffet you will never find a Plugger at. Never. Not nearly the mass quantities required for a single Plugger on that whole steam table, no less a herd of ‘em.

  42. Totally not Aviatrix
    February 26th, 2013 at 2:31 am [Reply]

    How fortuitous that Josh would be monologuing just as I have a monologuing problem to solve. I need to know the rest of a comedy monologue that begins, “There was an old lady whose heels/Were daintily fitted with wheels” and ends “She collided for choice/With a monster Rolls Royce/And went BUMP into regions seraphic.” I know some of the middle bits, and you can pretty much guess them from that, except that they need to be funnier and rhyme. Google doesn’t seem to know about it.

  43. Droopy Says
    February 26th, 2013 at 3:40 am [Reply]

    9 Dickweed Lane: Working with my McEclowny/Human translation device, I get this: “You stole a cow and its calf. Those are two felonies. You could lose your license and go to jail. And aren’t vets supposed to report animal abuse to the police, or something?”

  44. Dale
    February 26th, 2013 at 3:59 am [Reply]

    MARK TRAIL managed to acquire some kind of observer status, and has been imposed on one of the contestants. But he is such a close friend of another contestant that he is staying at the guy’s house.

    If Mark is so famous and important, why aren’t people following him around for autographs and pictures?

  45. Nehemiah Scudder
    February 26th, 2013 at 4:03 am [Reply]

    ALBERT CAMUS at the Hootin’ Holler Rhymin’ Contest! A blank for y’all to play with.

  46. gleeb
    February 26th, 2013 at 6:57 am [Reply]

    3-G: To make Luann feel more at home, Ruby has donned a dark wig and has no doubt been browbeating her as Margo would if she were well enough.

    ‘shaft: An old man is being insulted by a barber. Still.

    ‘bean: She’s clearly disappointed that her husband has not yet been felled by a stroke. As who wouldn’t be? Anyway, why doesn’t Cayha, who work’s in the school principal’s office, know about all this?

    Flowers for Neddy: It only took three days’ of phone calls, but Abbey finally understands that Neddy is coming home and with another person.

    A&J: That’s a pretty lazy form of anti-materialism.

    Dick: So, does the mayor have a memorial Sweatstain screen saver, or is that his tortured, perspiring spirit, trying to sweat from the other side?

    Thorp: Gil sees a way to use this weird new Peacock cult to ease his way to more not-coaching.

    Rex: This has to be a difficult call. “Yes, I think you should spend your money to help support these plucky, party-throwing strippers, one of whom may be dying.” Did we see Junior at all, by the way?

  47. Hogenmogen
    February 26th, 2013 at 7:24 am [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#41): That’s supposed to be Ruby, believe it or not. At first glance, I thought it was Margo in the first panel, but with some scorching to her head from the fire, covered with a chinzy bow. I thought “Dios Mio! Margo with a bow?? She must have suffered dain bramage with her smoke inhalation!” No, it’s Ruby. Ruby with the former red hair. Ruby the hair dresser. Ruby with Margo’s face, which reverts back to Ruby’s face in panel 2. This strip has a serious case of WTF-itis.

  48. CanuckDownSouth
    February 26th, 2013 at 7:49 am [Reply]

    @Der Kömmëntätör, Herr Schnärkïnätör (#31): embarrassing as it is to admit that one remembers more of RMMD than Rex’s ineffectual doctoring and all the paper-thin setups to show off scantily-clad ladies, I actually do recall that this all started with them being sent to evaluate whether the building was a good value for Old Lady to buy / take in exchange for some of her boy’s debts.

  49. Mooncattie
    February 26th, 2013 at 8:18 am [Reply]

    S-M: “Hey Kingpin, couldn’t you afford a second missile?” He would hear the cruel taunts of his fellow inmates in the years to come, but only Kingpin would know the real reason for his humiliation that day in San Francisco: he was just too cheap to spring for the Rustproofing/Anti-Confusion Package.

    JP: Dr. Clearing? Is that a joke on the name Dr. House? Is Ned bringing home the grumpy Greg House Hugh Laurie, or the wacky Bertie Wooster Hugh Laurie?

    MW: Tom Harpman took a break from his blueprints, explosives and fuses to think back on the previous month. The midnight crossing into America, the set-up in an anonymous West Coast housing complex, his rebuff of friendly neighbours with references to “a cold”. All the better to plan his nefarious attack on the Santa Royale Bay Bridge. The way was clear. Nothing could go wrong now.

    RMMD: Rex glanced at his wife while Melissa went on about Junior and his antics. Melissa. How would she look in that one-piece? Strong, rich, take-charge Melissa. She knew his weaknesses, and he loved her knowing them.

  50. Hogenmogen
    February 26th, 2013 at 8:34 am [Reply]

    Rex: No, Junior is NOT running a homeless shelter! These girls have homes. They live here in the condo.

  51. Écureuil Écumant
    February 26th, 2013 at 8:35 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#34): “You know what it’s like when you burn your hand, taking a cake out of the oven”

    Aye. ‘Tis almost like touching Apple Mary … there.

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