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Friday quickies

Gil Thorp, 9/26/08

Yeah, it’s mostly just you, Trisha, because Jeff doesn’t really interact much with terrifying 11-foot-tall giantesses, which is what you appear to be in the first panel. We appreciate that you have chosen six-foot-nine-Jeff-Ponczak, the one human available who comes even close to your magnificent proportions, for your sexual purposes, but you have to cut him some slack and let him get used to seeing all the way up your nose.

Marmaduke, 9/26/08

Having eaten all of the pedestrians in this damned town, Marmaduke must now actually force his way into cars for sustenance.

57 responses to “Friday quickies”

  1. SpiffBereft
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:09 am [Reply]

    If either car would just slam on the brakes this nightmare could end.

  2. Dingo
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:10 am [Reply]

    I love Terry Bryson’s look in panel one. I swear she’s raised that briefcase for a game of “whack the idiot.”

  3. The Spectacular Spider-Brick
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:22 am [Reply]

    Aww man, I killed the last thread. Hell with it, I’m reposting. (Now watch Josh put up a Saturday post right after this…)

    A3G: For being such a dim bulb, Lu Ann’s doing pretty good to have figured out that Alan has been shot without any clues from the Red-Headed League here. That carbon monoxide poisoning must have given her some psychic powers. Oooh, powers… as in Lu Ann Powers! Get Stan Lee on the phone, I smell an exciting new superhero strip! …Well, OK, a new superhero strip. …No, never mind, it was just gas.

    (WT)DT: So, who’s in the getaway car? How did TRAZE-R manage to unload himself from the truck, get to that car (which is nowhere to be seen in the first two panels) and pick up the back end in the space of just two sentences? How is the back end of the car being held up at that angle, unless the front end is in a ditch? How is that bumper not ripping off? And how did TRAZE-R reach the bumper in the first place with those stubby arms?! Physicists in the Tracyverse must be regarded with the same skepticism as urine therapists are in ours.

    GA: She’s spent over $2,000 on what? Apparently, not bras or hairstylists.

    thorps. As pleased as I am to see another brave heterosexual couple “come out” on the comics page, I have to point out… FACES DO NOT WORK THAT WAY!

    H&J: And maybe buy some furniture while you’re at it.

    JP: Hah! Hey, look, everyone… a sweaterpuppy!

    MW: Again, that dark-haired woman keeps on with her spiel without any acknowledgment of what Toby is saying. It’s almost like she’s following a list of talking points she has to get out no matter what the questioner says. Kind of like a certain vice-presidential candidate, am I right, people?! Ha ha!

    (**chirp** **chirp** **chirp**)

    That’s the last time I let John Hambrock write my stuff…

    RMCB: “Oh, you’ve got nothing to worry about, June! No woman could take me away from you!” “Aww, Rex, that’s so sweet! You… hey, wait a minute! Get back here!

    6C: Isn’t this strip supposed to be a little more progressive than this? Crying to get what you want from a man is a Lucy Ricardo move. Also, Stephanie Piro, STOP TRYING TO DRAW BOOBS.

  4. One-eyed Wolfdog
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:22 am [Reply]

    Other people are not fooled by Pluggers’ pathetically transparent metaphors for their unbridled racism.

  5. odinthor
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:27 am [Reply]

    Agnes — Win!

    SaFo — But unless the seeming gal co-worker is a cross-dresser, which would add an interesting dimension, she’d actually be a confidante. [sound of many eyes rolling] Well, she would, she would! Or maybe Ted hasn’t realized that she’s a woman, which would certainly add another interesting dimension.

    DtM — By an extraordinary coincidence, years later these would also prove to be the opening lines in Dennis’s debut movie scene.

    GT — Ladies and gentlemen, we are pleased to announce that we will have a special guest appearance in panel two today by Thing. All proceeds will go to the Hollywood Weird Creatures Retirement Home in Saugus. Thank you. We now return to our regular lip-smackin’ action.

    Baldo — Jazz-hands Baldo!

    H&L — The first draft had Hi responding, “And the last thing I read in a man’s magazine was an article extolling the benefits of a single life!”, but the strip’s expense account couldn’t afford the food fight which ensued.

  6. Poteet
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:28 am [Reply]

    (DT)GT — Trisha also needs to work on her facial expressions if she wishes to evoke enthusiasm instead of terror in other human beings. When I look at her in Panel One, I feel like a chicken skewer that just fell from the grill onto the coals. She’s annoyed at me, but hungry, so she’s about to grab me and eat me in one bite.

  7. Uncle Lumpy
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:31 am [Reply]

    #6 –

    Mmm . . . tasty, tasty yakipoteet!

  8. Poteet
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:31 am [Reply]

    A3G — HAR!! I seldom laugh aloud at A3G, but that last panel did it for me.

  9. Rusty
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:32 am [Reply]

    Fantastic goatee on the amazon woman.

    Has a new artist been confirmed in Big Dog? The other car passengers look to be from an entirely different strip.

  10. Maughta
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:52 am [Reply]

    Panel one of GT is the last thing you’ll see in the zombie apocalypse.

  11. El Santo
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:56 am [Reply]

    Gil Thorp: I gotta say, Giant Trisha is a little frightening… and yet a little arousing at the same time.

  12. Calico
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:58 am [Reply]

    But, um, it’s Saturday! Can I call them Saturday quickies? : )

    Now Toby will think she has to become a vegetarian, should she acquire a “Spam filter.”

    I really don’t know who is dumber, Toby or Luann Powers.

  13. kingklash
    September 27th, 2008 at 11:59 am [Reply]

    While I normally dig the idea of a tall chick, if she insisted on constantly showing me her neatly trimmed nose hairs, I would have to run the other way.

    Anybody else notice the little dog cowering in terror in the front seat, trying to get away from the ‘Duke’s unwarranted advances?

  14. Calico
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:01 pm [Reply]

    Oh, I see – Friday’s GT etc. posted on Sat. AM.

    I’m the thick one today! Cheers!

  15. Calico
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:02 pm [Reply]

    GT – Trish looks like Patricia Charbonneau on steroids. Hold on, boys and girls!

  16. queek
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:06 pm [Reply]

    GT: The Saturday strip is “awwwwwwwww” and makes up for Panel 1 of the Friday strip.

    PBS: poor Pig.

    JP: thank you for our daily puppies.

  17. Sunny Paris
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:07 pm [Reply]

    # 4 One-Eyed Wolfdog.

    I know that this cartoon certainly isn’t about ice cream. Because around the pluggers that I know think Neapolitan, despite its oh-so-fancy name, is a good deal. “Look, my darlin’ daughter-in-law. We know you like sweets so we got you here this treat, which you are expected to eat while visiting. It’s got three flavors in one box, and only costs $2.50. And all the artificial ingredients taste almost as good as actual milk and sugar.”

  18. Team MP
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:08 pm [Reply]

    SF- Thanks to all the folks who gave the answer to the crossword puzzle joke. I’m not sure it is scientifically possible for me to be any worse at crosswords and I appreciate the accommodation.

    When the sexual tension between Ted and Aria is finally broken and Ted needs to take a step back to save his marriage, what obscure sci-fi reference leads up to it? My vote is for Star Blazers?

  19. Baka Gaijin
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:11 pm [Reply]

    Frazz: “Hot-butted?” What, is that really Dolly from FC? I mean, who else would confuse “hot buttered” with “hot butted?”

  20. Sobek
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:15 pm [Reply]

    I’m slowly starting to realize that, despite my initial hopes, Mark Trail is not going to punch global warming in the face.

    What’s the opposite of coming? Oh yeah. Reading Mary Worth.

  21. mojo
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:18 pm [Reply]

    #8 Poteet: I did too! I just LOVE the little guessing game they are forcing on Miss Brain Trust Lu Ann during this time of fear and uncertainty. I wonder how many times they can allude to Alan’s death without actually using the word “dead”?

  22. AeroSquid
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:18 pm [Reply]

    An E-mail from PBS creator Stephan Pastis: Help spread the laffs !

    Well thank you, Patrick…I appreciate the info…

    By the way, I’ll tell you, if you ever get the chance, and are so inclined, you’d be doing me a huuuuuuuuge favor if you let ANY of your local papers know you like the strip and want them to run it (assuming they don’t already). I would really love for the strip to one day appear in more papers and reader feedback makes a huge difference. If not, that’s fine also. I’m just glad you read the strip!

    Thanks again,

    Stephan

  23. AeroSquid
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:20 pm [Reply]

    PBS email is Theratandpig@aol.com

  24. Joe Blevins
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:32 pm [Reply]

    GT: Panel 3 of this Gil Thorp has broken my brain. I can’t begin to process it all. It’s Da Vinci’s Last Supper filtered through Hopper’s Nighthawks, as it would be rendered by an artist who normally draws explanatory diagrams of how to perform the Heimlich maneuver, but who is now stiffly trying to approximate the current Archie house style. Phew!

  25. mojo
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:39 pm [Reply]

    AG3 dialogue for the next week:

    “Well, then, is Alan at the post office?”
    “No, Lu Ann. Alan isn’t at the post office, either.”
    “How about the bank?”
    “No, honey, I’m sorry. Alan ISN’T at the bank.”
    “Um…how about the market?”
    “Oooh! Wait! Did you just say ‘morgue’?”
    “No, I said market. Why?”
    “Oh. Sorry. (*sigh*) No, Lu Ann, Alan isn’t at the market, either.”

  26. Erik
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:39 pm [Reply]

    I like how in Marmaduke, his owners don’t actually try to stop him. Knowing that attempting would be futile, they just observe with empathy. “It’s a shame, too, I rather liked the Johnsons… ah well, maybe now the lines at the gas station won’t be as long.”

  27. Red Greenback
    September 27th, 2008 at 12:49 pm [Reply]

    BIG DOG: I wasn’t quite awake when I saw the featured Marm, and this is how I first read it.
    MT,W-KC: Here’s my cheap shot at today’s strip.
    gilthorp: Trisha forgot how tall Jeff is. (He’s 6- foot-9)

  28. Black Drazon
    September 27th, 2008 at 1:05 pm [Reply]

    No wonder she likes Jeff so much! I mean, look at his ventriloquism skills, making it look in panel 1 like the fedora’d fellow on the right is the one speaking! I’m sure those skills will keep their relationship fresh and interesting until about the third panel, where apparently a car will come at them from some direction not yet defined by man and come crashing through the window.

  29. cheech wizard
    September 27th, 2008 at 1:15 pm [Reply]

    Saturday GT – Like many of today’s young people, Trisha has discovered that you can eliminate dating entirely by just going into the woods to screw.

  30. daveh
    September 27th, 2008 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

    GT- looking at the first panel, I swear she’s got a flashlight under her chin going “boogie boogie boogie”

  31. Cherie
    September 27th, 2008 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

    SF – - “What’s an eight-letter word for “confident” beginning with an “I”? The answer is “intrepid”. I was looking for more of a punch-line… Have I missed something?

    “Infidelity” is a ten-letter word.
    “Adultery” starts with an “a”.

    There’s always “Cocksure”. But it begins with a “c”.

  32. Cherie
    September 27th, 2008 at 1:27 pm [Reply]

    Oh, it’s confid-A-nt…

    That’s the punch-line… !

    I should have looked at Friday’s posts before assuming that no one had discussed it here.

  33. Ukulele Ike
    September 27th, 2008 at 1:33 pm [Reply]

    I refuse to go back in time and read Friday’s posts. But I assume the eight-letter word is “intimate,” something a wife doesn’t want her husband getting with blondes at the office.

  34. IagoPogo
    September 27th, 2008 at 1:33 pm [Reply]

    Um, kudos (I guess) to Anderson & staff for the brave attempt to illustrate a rather trite Marma-dull “joke”. Personally, my brain hurts from trying to glean why anyone even thought that this would be a “funny” idea.

  35. Skullturf Q. Beavispants
    September 27th, 2008 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

    Dennis the Menace:

    What does “all the way” mean here? Does it refer to what some people call “everything on it” or “all dressed”?

    Or does it just mean he wants one really badly?

  36. Mars
    September 27th, 2008 at 1:53 pm [Reply]

    Friday’s Lio was bittersweet, a pre-acknowledgement of the death of a beloved character (Opus).

    On a related subject, everybody here should be reading Lio. So should everyone else everywhere. It’s been a long time since a comic strip has entertained me this much.

  37. monkey.dave
    September 27th, 2008 at 2:03 pm [Reply]

    9CL: I used to like this strip back when Edda was in high school acting like a grownup instead of a grownup acting like a high schooler.

    A3G: “The hospital?! What is it?” “It’s a big building full of patients, but that’s not important right now.”

    MW: “I’ll have to become more aware. It’ll save me trouble in the long run.” That’s almost a direct rip-off of Paris Hilton’s famous “In the future, I plan on taking more of an active role in the decisions I make.”

    PBS: I predict that this strip will not be a hit among female dental hygienists who have to deal with creepy single guys who don’t get much contact with women.

    Pluggers: Pluggers finally takes a stand against miscegenation. Also, according to this, Homer Simpson is not a plugger.

  38. Poteet
    September 27th, 2008 at 2:04 pm [Reply]

    # 7 Uncle Lumpy — Thanks! I looked up yaki chicken, and methinks my next chicken skewers will be tastier.

    # 24 Joe Blevins — BWAHAHA! And curse you for forcing me to look at it again.

  39. Ukulele Ike
    September 27th, 2008 at 2:05 pm [Reply]

    Skullturf @ #35: I think we wants a big messy hot dog with all the condiments available, aka “Chicago-style.”

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chicago-style_hot_dog

    Or maybe he wants the whole 12 inches shoved up his butt.

  40. crossbuck
    September 27th, 2008 at 2:11 pm [Reply]

    MT:
    So, to be the evil dude in a Mark Trail story, one must have access to a load of Brylcreem and a ’70s gay pornstar mustache.

  41. lesles
    September 27th, 2008 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

    JP – ok, i know we’re all meant to be looking at the puppy, but i couldn’t drag myself away from how thoroughly dewey was rocking the star trek next gen look in his office/study. i mean, i love that show, but there’s not enough pointy sticks and threats in the entire universe that would make me take home decor tips from it.

  42. The Sparrow
    September 27th, 2008 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

    #19: *sings* I’m hot-butted, check it and see
    I got a fever of a hundred and three
    Come on baby, do you do more than dance?
    I’m hot-butted, hot-butted

    Okay, I’ll stop now. That song will be in my brain (complete with stupid corrupted lyrics) for the rest of today. Damn my pitiful attempt at parody!

    Monty: This strip is full of win. I’ve laughed out loud at this comic several times this week, and I never laugh out loud at most of the so-called “funnies.” Good job, Monty!

    Fooblite, hereby referred to as FLOOB: Goddamn it, Lynn, it’s bad enough that your strip is boring… do you have to rip off Peanuts catchphrases too??

  43. Talking Squirrel
    September 27th, 2008 at 2:38 pm [Reply]

    BALDO offered the censors a challenge similar to Get Fuzzy’s — a challenge likewise declined. I’m not sure about his new circumlocution, though: it seems to convey, simultaneously, the worst of both warts and farts.

    LITTLE DOG LOST is, er, um, turning out kinda like Pluggers who aren’t pretending to be human. One of the principals is a wizened, emaciated, dehydrated snapping turtle (I so want to call it a cooter!) who looks like he barely escaped MT’s sucked-dry wetlands (the three portly daisy-chaining tortoises actually drawn by Jackalrod in a recent strip seemed, by comparison, unnaturally carefree).

    Aforementioned turtle, having been trapped underneath — I kid you not — a huge pig’s ass for the last couple of days, finally gets out by biting the pig’s tail. This is sidesplitting, or I suppose shellsplitting humor, folks!

    But the truly lovely touch is the porker nonchalantly displaying his star-shaped asshole as he flees. Yes, most mammals (e.g., dogs) are well known to possess asterisk-shaped assholes. But pigs uniquely sport star-shaped ones, to complement their corkscrew penises no doubt. Sort of the nether-regions equivalent of the platypus, apparently.

    So while asserting that Little Dog’s storyline is indeed lost in a dried-up wetlands of banalerie, I’ll grudgingly allow that it has at least gone where even FOOB never went — to portray a pig’s asshole. Mooned by a pig … is life even worth living anymore?

  44. Bribaby
    September 27th, 2008 at 2:38 pm [Reply]

    Sheesh! That Trisha person looks like some kind of porscine-human-Dr. Moreau hybrid; maybe it’s animal pheromones that attract all the men.

    Is it John Hughes Day at wherever Gil Thorpe takes place? Everyone looks and dresses like they’re stuck in an ’80s teen movie. And I’m new to the strip, but something that’s really bugged me so far is that this is supposed to be a sports-oriented comic, right? So where are the locker room and shower scenes?! How can you do a sports-themed comic with no shower scenes?! Am I just supposed to read this for the story?!

  45. Poteet
    September 27th, 2008 at 2:46 pm [Reply]

    MT — Yes, you should indeed be shaking in your moustache, Dark-Haired Villain! Hundreds of wetland drainage projects across the country have been stopped because a “well-known conservationist” has written about them!

  46. Talking Squirrel
    September 27th, 2008 at 2:49 pm [Reply]

    Baka Gaijin says:
    Frazz: “Hot-butted?” What, is that really Dolly from FC? I mean, who else would confuse “hot buttered” with “hot butted?”

    The late, great Marlon “Oleo” Brando.

  47. Brick Bradford
    September 27th, 2008 at 2:55 pm [Reply]

    A3G It almost sounds like they’re about to tell LuAnn that they took Alan to live in the country.

    JP I will never complain about the slow pace in this strip again–as long as they linger on this scene as long as possible.

    MF Will the duck soon go the McCain campaign’s list of things that are now sexist? I’m thinking no.

  48. Joe Blevins
    September 27th, 2008 at 2:58 pm [Reply]

    GT: A beauty tip from Gil Thorp: when you go in for rhinoplasty, never ask for the Rod Serling special.

  49. Baka Gaijin
    September 27th, 2008 at 3:15 pm [Reply]

    #39 Ukelele Ike:

    Skullturf @ #35: I think we wants a big messy hot dog with all the condiments available, aka “Chicago-style.”

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chicago-style_hot_dog

    Or maybe he wants the whole 12 inches shoved up his butt.

    Ha ha ha! “Or maybe he wants the whole 12 inches shoved up his butt.” I’m appending that to all comic strip’s punchlines tomorrow. I’m not sure it’s enough to make Cathy funny, though.

  50. Muffaroo-who-walks
    September 27th, 2008 at 3:17 pm [Reply]

    The folks who got up too late to see my comment last night on the Saturday strips missed my speculation on whether, in the throes of passion, Miss Buxley calls Private Bailey “Beetle” and he calls her “Miss.”

    Also, I clarified that Jeff “Sackoponc” Ponczak in Gil Thorp is really just six feet tall, but everybody says “Six Foot, Nine Inch” because being tall isn’t the only thing that’s notable about him. [dick joke (c) 2008 by O.M. Muffaroo]

    I said some other things, too, but I think those were the highlights. Thank you for reading this comment.

  51. docweasel
    September 27th, 2008 at 7:46 pm [Reply]

    Ugh, the first thing I though of when I saw the Marmaduke panel was that if I had a dog that big in the car, the windows would all stay permanently DOWN. A dog-fart from a dog that big and and that nasty could be lethal.

  52. No One's Muse
    September 27th, 2008 at 10:27 pm [Reply]

    Christina Ricci will be playing Trisha in the Gil Thorp movie: http://www.iwatchstuff.com/images/2006/03/penelope-ricci.jpg

  53. soundman
    September 28th, 2008 at 12:15 am [Reply]

    Is Marmaduke really about to eat Droopy Dawg?

    I mean, I’m all in favor of that, it would be Marm’s greatest contribution to world peace, but I expect he’ll be hit by a falling anvil in short order if he really goes for the Droopster.

  54. Shmork
    September 28th, 2008 at 11:44 am [Reply]

    I know I’m late to the party here, but when did Gil Thorp switch from Comic Sans to a real comic font? Thank heavens that they did, though.

  55. Robert Whitaker Sirignano
    September 28th, 2008 at 12:25 pm [Reply]

    http://www.toplessrobot.com/2008/09/the_10_newspaper_comic_strips_that_need_to_fking_e.php

    Don’t know if anyone saw this or not, but it can be revisited…

    Pretty much has most of the comics we hate on target, though the list can be made longer (they don’t have GARFIELD on it.)

  56. Sobek
    September 28th, 2008 at 3:31 pm [Reply]

    Everyone will remember today as the day that Gil Thorpe got so bizarre that, in the third panel, the space-time continuum actually, visibly tore in half.

  57. Ol'Froth
    September 28th, 2008 at 8:16 pm [Reply]

    Ok, while the giantess in GT is disturbing enough, look at the hand holding the drink in panel 2! The guy must have an eight inch long thumb to be able to grip that cup!

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