They just want to “screw”
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Apartment 3-G, 9/3/06
Ted: I could use some decorating tips.
Tommie: I’m afraid that’s not my strong suit.
Ted: Never mind, because that’s NOT ACTUALLY WHY I’M INVITING YOU UP TO MY APARTMENT. Jesus, you’re dense. How about dinner? Will dinner work? Great. See you at seven. Don’t wear underwear.
Ted at least can pull off his smooth talk without resorting to scare quotes, unlike some people would-be lotharios we could mention…
Mary Worth, 9/3/06
Note that “talk” and its variant “conversation” only appears in pervert-quotes when Aldo uses it. Mary is too forthright to resort to that kind of euphemism. Still, since nobody ever discusses this subject with Mary, we need somebody to just tell it like he means it:
Of course, we all are desperate to know just what it is that Aldo is looking at in the last panel, but sadly we won’t find out until at least Tuesday, since Monday will inevitably be a recap of today, and because Monday is a holiday, Tuesday may need to be a recap of Monday. My guess: a phalanx of cops, or the exhumed corpse of his wife. I’m enjoying the look on Mary’s face in that final panel; she’s thinking, “Oh, Aldo, I didn’t want it to come to this, but, well, you started things: I’m just finishing them.”
For Better Or For Worse, 9/3/06
“You kids are right into the ‘pop culture’?” Christ, even by Canadian standards you couldn’t possibly say anything dorkier than that without collapsing into some sort of black hole of dweebishness. The quote marks are just icing on the cake. No, there’s only one word that can properly describe Dr. P.:
Of course, 4Evah and Eva’s bassist is wearing a turquoise tank top, so maybe they aren’t exactly arbiters of cool themselves.