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Kids, an apology up front: I didn’t keep up with the comments this week as much I should have, because I was juggling a visit from my mom and practicing for my water ballet debut. (If you are interested in the latter, there are some nice pics from the Fluid Movement Facebook page, bmore media, the Baltimore Sun, and the Washington Post — careful on that last one, as it plays an ad with sound before you get to the pictures.) Most of these comments are from the beginning and end of the week — I’m sure there were some funny ones in the middle I missed!

That said, here’s the week’s top comment:

“I am just enough of a stereotypical man to often think that nothing can improve on a nice steak dinner. I am just enough of a stereotypical gay man to know that the best improvement would be sitting down next to a drunk Margo Magee who is irate because she’s getting made over by a couple of frumpy bitches.” –LogopolisMike

And the funny runners up!

“If Sassy really is a Dalmatian, it is the filthiest, most urine-stained dog imaginable and no amount of bathing will get it clean. It’s like the antithesis to Mark’s pristine mind, possibly analogous to the Portrait of Dorian Grey.” –Aviatrix

“If there is a God in heaven, tomorrow’s Luann will be one long panel of Brad slowly inhaling through his nose, followed by a small second panel; a close up of Brad’s eyes, as he whispers, ‘the scent of Toni.’ And that will be the last Luann comic. Ever. Greg Evans will simply put down his pen, nod slowly, and walk off into the distance, never to be seen again. At long last, his Work will have been done.” –Dan

“I’m all for honesty in relationships, but if you are wearing cologne you borrowed from your father, and if you are not thirteen years old, maybe don’t share that detail with your date.” –BananaSam

“I was angry, and confused! That anger and confusion made me pelvic thrust at everything and everyone!” –CleverNameIsaac

“For a brief moment, I thought Luann was going to be cool enough to reference the Old Spice Guy. ‘SWAN DIVE! Into the most awkward odor-related compliment of your life!'” –Juggleboy

“If I were in this scenario and the guy I was seeing characterized me as a ‘sexy fragrance that’s all his own,’ I would not even wait for him to slow the car down before leaping out in abject horror. I do feel, however, that the time investment required to vomit all over his upholstery first would be totally worth it.” –Violet

“Oh man, the sight of a lonely, heartbroken Crankshaft in panels one and two makes me unfathomably happy. If I could melt that image down and inject it directly into my veins I’d never feel depressed ever again.” –Paddy

“Jamaal will find out later he actually called his mother at 3 a.m. to confess his love for Herb. Hilarity still doesn’t ensue.” –zenvelo

“Mr. Wilson really doesn’t have a mouth! He has nosehairs, and a chin, neither of which can be construed as a mouth, believe me, I tried for like ten minutes.” –garet

“Sometimes, it feels like legacy comics are the only media outlets still keeping tabs on milestones of old-timey Americana like the 100th anniversary of the Boy Scouts, while the rest simply focus on Katy Perry’s boobs.” –Joe Blevins

“If one were to single-out the second panel, one might assume a family abandoned their watermelon-headed child in a pile of his own defecation. ‘Let the waves carry him off,’ they might say. ‘It’s the Atlantic Ocean’s problem now!'” –Marc

“This Family Circus should have Mark Trail-style captions over it. ‘The ocean does not care for architecture or the emotional pleasure of creation. It is mindless, soulless, and inexorable as death itself. The ocean is home to whales, sharks, beautiful dolphins, and deadly jellyfish. Do not throw rocks at the ocean.’” –Zaratustra

Big thanks to everyone who put cash in my tip jar! And we must of course give thanks to our advertisers:

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