Metapost: Hot ‘n’ muggy comments of the week!
Wait, did I talk about how hot it was last week? Well, it’s still hot, isn’t it? Anyhoo, here’s your comment of the week.
“Wait, Ziggy is a mammal? I hereby renounce my membership.” –BigTed
And the runners up! Very amusing!
“I was going to comment on the fact that self-serve gas stations are considered a modern development in Hi’s town. Then I got distracted by his grocery store purchases, which include two carrots, a quart of something beige, and an ostrich egg.” –Esther Blodgett
“How much to just listen? My wife will know me by the silence and heavy breathing!” –js
“I only wish this Archie was the start of an Inglorious Basterds homage which culminates in alternate history machine gun assassination of Jughead, history’s greatest monster.” –Dennis the Two and a Half Menace
“I find the Clean-Cut-Kids Gang’s plans for their loot to be kind of sweetly modest: ‘We’ll throw a big party! Heck, just by fencing the television sets, we can get the best plastic cups that money can buy! And no more buttercream frosting for us. It’s ganache all the way!'” –bourbon babe, unbuckled
“I’m pretty sure Ziggy’s fish is just giggling childishly at the word ‘Dick.’ And he’s right, that’s by far the funniest thing that’s ever been in the strip.” –Doctor Handsome
“How does one sexually harass a Luann character? By telling them there’s more to sex than double entendres?” –Dan
“Tiffany and Toni, like Liz in FOOB, have naturally plump, pale, ‘Luscious Lips o’ Loveliness®’ because LOOK AT ME I AM ATTRACTIVE. Ann’s lips are dark because she wears lipstick. Like a WHORE.” –Uncle Lumpy
“Does Dr. Jeff realize he now has to go ahead and *hold* the fundraising dinner? ‘People have expressed interest … our work here is done!'” –ks
“Les is smirking because of the man’s effrontery: ‘Does he compare his love for his wife with the profundity of my passion for Lisa? What fools these mortals be! Does he know that when they make love, his wife closes her eyes and fantasizes that Chemosabe is me? Because every woman craves me and my sincerity!’ And fifty other sentences that express the fullness of Les’s self-absorption.” –Droopy Says
“I like to think that the jagged dividing line is actually trying to attack Lu Ann in today’s Apartment 3-G for her unbelievably boring dialogue.” –Alan’s Addiction
“So, while Alan is basking in a hero’s adulation for — what? falling on a giant bed and not dying? — our Baby-Killer Contract Babe is being strapped to a gurney and whisked off to Bellevue where she’ll be connected to a continuous IV drip of Klonopin and Haldol, spending the rest of her days counting the cracks in the ceiling and mumbling incomprehensibly to herself. And does Alan — who 10 minutes prior was telling said BBCB his life story to show her how much he cares about her — ask about her or show any curiosity over what might have taken place on the roof after his pratfall? No: he’s too busy defacing Fire Department property.” –Mudhead
“I finally caught up on the last week of Mary Worth. Why didn’t anyone tell me I missed absolutely nothing?” –Gene S.
Mark Trail: “I could watch this scene unfold for another couple days, easy. Wouldn’t it be great if Rusty became entrapped under the getaway van?” –ArchieNemesis
“I think we’re being too hard on Ann Eiffel. The poor woman is just looking for a little love and the fact that she is looking for it to happen with Brad DeGroot proves that she has either hit rock-bottom or is insane or something. She needs our sympathy, not our scorn.” –Terrapin
“You’re too late, Dr. Jeff … look at Mary’s skirt in panel one. Her heart belongs to Zorro!” –Mumblix Grumph
“‘Get in!’ ‘Uhm, no thanks, Mr. Toad. I’ve heard about your wild rides.'” –Dood
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