Hey, look how early I am with today’s top comment!
“So Mr. Meatface over there considers disabled bears abnormal? That’s pretty insensitive, especially coming from a guy whose nostrils are about twelve inches away from his eyebrows.” –made of wince
And with the very funny runners up!
“Sure, panel five features Oscar The Grouch, Garbage Ape and Top Cat, but let’s not overlook the other beloved characters in line: Blackface Skunk, Vaguely Confused Owl, Hastily Sketched Creature Of Some Sort, and Terry The Ticklish Raccoon. A garbage night fiesta indeed!” –Cassandra Cat’s Lawyer
“Crank ignores an early warning sign of a heart attack. Certainly he’ll make another lame comment as pall bearer. ‘Never have so many lifted so much for so few’ or some such crap.” –Junior:Burping Cat of Warren,MI.
Funky Winkerbean: “Jess’s idea of ‘making a wedding video’ is sitting in the pew next to her camera being glad she got married.” –Uncle Lumpy
“GREY HOT ASHEN ACTION” –Failure Artist
“Is ‘stabbing a Romanian in a dark jungle’ euphemistic? IT IS NOW!!!!” –word-doctor
“If all that land comes with the house, I’d say that real estate lady is just trying a scam and will sell the property later to developers for millions. Who’s the real witch now, hmm?” –Berry
“I don’t mean to frighten you, but a wounded Mark Trail can be a lot more bland than a normal Mark Trail.” –nescio
“Like any dictator, Heath will post images of himself ubiquitously about the neighborhood, each with its sly eyes saying ‘I’m not directly facing you but I’m watching’ and the single protruding tooth symbolizing the threat of violence and the rakish whiskers protruding from the picture frame saying ‘I can come down from this picture, folks. Believe it.'” –hogenmogen
“What’s in that crock that Mary’s bringing in? It’s ‘nothing’, right? Because there is no interior to that crock? Because it’s actually a huge crack rock sculpted into the shape of a crock, and Mary is only loudly talking about whatever smug crap she’s talking about to throw the feds off her trail as she smuggles the stuff to her newest mule.” –bunivasal
“I could have been back 3 hours ago, but I really needed to stand around flexing.” –Chareth Cutestory
“Her sorrow belongs only the her. The horse tranquilizers I have her hooked on, though, those belong to me, and she knows it.” –Voshkod
“The words say ‘I don’t care about her feelings, issues, or thoughts.’ But that sly smile says ‘if you know what I mean, eh? No, don’t go, stay a bit, these sleepy eyes can not care about you, too. Both of you at the same time, even.'” –Margaret
“The hand that worries me the most is the one in the first panel. If a hand that size were plopped down on my shoulder while someone was telling me that I was about to become their ‘super sub’, I’d flee in panic before they pulled out the bun, lettuce, and mayo.” –seismic-2
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