Metapost: Comments for days (and weeks)
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The comment of the week: You want it, we’ve got it:
“Presumptuous of her to tell JJ he doesn’t want to hurt anyone. He had to spend a bunch of time with the inhumanly dull Mark Trail, who left him for dead in a flood. There is nothing JJ wants more than to pull that trigger.” –Conynaut
The runners up: Also hilarious!
“‘William Bellows Inkpot‘ may be the sorriest attempt at a funny name I’ve ever seen in the newspaper comic strip Funky Winkerbean.” –Rosstifer
“Well, judging from Dagwood’s ‘eat anything that can’t outrun me’ diet, his teeth are either made of an indestructible titanium alloy or they’re a graveyard of rotting stumps.” –Pozzo
“Say what you want about Mary Worth, but ‘Dawn shops at H&M‘ is as solidly believable a piece of characterization as any I’ve seen on the comics page.” –Dan
“Alternate caption: ‘You know you’re a senior plugger when you find out that the crossword puzzle you’ve been struggling with for three days is actually a Sudoku.’” –Guy Lumbago
“I was trying to figure out which military occupational specialty ‘envelope licker‘ falls under. Signal Corps seemed most obvious, maybe 25U Signal Support Systems Specialist. But if the envelopes are intended for the public, probably 46Q Public Affairs Specialist. But then I realized the horror of it all, Pvt. Zero’s disgusting saliva slathered over envelopes intended for enemy combatants, and it was clear – 74D Chemical, Biological, Radiological and Nuclear (CBRN) Specialist. Godspeed, Pvt. Zero and your horrific mouth flora. Godspeed.” –Voshkod
“There are days when this strip veers dangerously close to looking like the junior version of The Lockhorns, and you know what? I love it.” –pugfuggly
“‘Theft with a gun and insulting the Small Business Administration … those are crimes against God and man, JJ! Perhaps you’re not aware of that, living in the desert as you do.’ ‘How is insulting the SBA a crime?” ‘Obviously you’ve never read Leviticus. It’s my favorite.’ ‘How about leaving me to die after the flood?!’ ‘Leviticus.’” –Little Blue Bicycle
“Ah, Google Translate, the language of love!” –TheDiva
“Calling Butter Brinkel simply by less than his full name is a little off brand.” –Foodar
“And, hey, ladies, I have a possible title for your documentary: A Brinkel in Crime. You can use that! Just give me credit. Anyway, here’s another anecdote about me and Dashiell Hammett…” –Joe Blevins
“Somebody’s looking to make a fortune on a series of stories about a dystopian future — but somehow I think The Cow Sayer (Parts 1, 2 and 3) is no Hunger Games.” –BigTed
“Let’s all spare a thought for the Disney/Marvel marketing manager who had to sell her bosses on the idea of spending money on a product placement in Hi and Lois and then had to turn around and explain to the interns what a newspaper comic is.” –Francisco Arrowroot
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