Metapost: C-O-T-W-T-O-G-O
Post Content
It’s Friday, it’s COTW time, let’s get all comment of the week up in here!
“Gasoline Alley is really adamant about stating and restating Ida Noe’s central gimmick (She’s a magic doll!) despite the fact that it is easily the most memorable and straightforward bit in the entire strip. ‘Got it, talking doll, magical I assume? Great. Now remind me again which of these one hundred lumpy townies are actually from the 1930s and which ones just seem like they are based on general vibe.’” –BananaSam
And here are your very funny runners up!
“I was sure that the answer was going to be something like ‘Reeky Rat, as the name suggests, is a filthy rodent who would never voluntarily bathe or shower, except maybe to cover up a crime.’ But yeah, window condensation too, I guess.” –pugfuggly
“What’s that in Rex’s carefully-held-offscreen glass? Prune juice, of course, the better to keep you regular and on a schedule unlike certain mountainous roots-country stars we could mention.” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV
“Love Slylock’s expression here. He genuinely CANNOT believe that someone thought they could invoke basic civil rights in his presence. Reeky will learn otherwise when Slylock drowns him in his own bathtub and writes it off as a heart attack on his report.” –ectojazzmage
“Jimmy and I never lived out our dreams to travel the world because his heart gave out due to job stress. That’s not how it was meant to be! He was supposed to have a heart attack next to me while we climbed a monument in South-East Asia!” –Ettorre
“Having thought it over, Stell realized that literally anyone who isn’t Wilbur is worth marrying.” –Craig!
“Yes, Mary, I miss the rush of my Obsessive-Compulsion Disorder in making wedding plans. Now I see the light! The light at the end of the tunnel/hallway I’ll go down to Ed’s animal operating room and say our vows as he euthanizes someone’s (hopefully a guest) dear pet!” –SabeHombre
“Copy/pasting the same image of Snuffy into both panels had some unintended consequences. Not only is Snuffy fishing in Silas’ store but I genuinely couldn’t parse what Snuffy’s can of worms was in this new context. A smashed trophy? A repulsive flesh-colored hat? An idol of some monstrous three-headed hillbilly god?” –Victor Von
“Mary and Stell froze. The dog had just said ‘woof.’ Not barked, but clearly enunciated the word ‘woof.’ Both women started to slowly back away as, half a mile away, Wilbur cursed himself. Half a million dollars on that dog bot, and I blew it by saying ‘woof,’ he thought in despair.” –Voshkod
“Culture has been frozen in time for the last 15-20 years or so, which is pretty helpful for the blissfully out-of-touch old men who make up most of the comic strip industry. Momma was referencing Taylor Swift a decade ago, Apartment 3-G did Beyoncé in 2010, and yet somehow these are two reasonable celebrities for tweens in 2024 to reference. For reference, this is like if Gasoline Alley in 2004 had some little kids think the biggest stars were Cyndi Lauper and Whitney Houston.” –Schroduck
“Oh man, I can’t wait for the new TikTok viral fad, inevitably called The Wilson Sit: Right arm tucked behind your back, left hand resting on your hips, ankles crossed. I urge you to try it yourself, Curmudgeonites! I’m doing it right now (while dictating this comment, obviously), and it’s … weird!” –els
“I like to think they’re just reading an ordinary book and Dennis is making this observation out of the blue.” –Tabby Lavalamp
“‘Our teacher wants us to write about the planets an’ stars.’ ‘Stars like Gloria Swanson and Josephine Baker?’ ‘Oh, right, you were born in 1918, just like this comic strip.’ ‘Yes, which is why I also believe that the Milky Way galaxy encompasses the entire universe, because we didn’t have any scientific method of observing space any farther away!’ ‘Oh, I get it — you’re not dumb, you’re just really old!’ ‘Good job … you’ve finally figured out the true meaning of Gasoline Alley!’” –TD
“‘I’m a magic doll! I can do anything!’ ‘Can you fix our eyes so the villagers stop calling us hideous monsters and forming hunting parties to kill us?’ ‘…I can do almost anything!’” –jroggs
“I think these kids’ next magic school assignment needs to be ‘learn where the library is.’” –Banana Jr. 6000
“There’s a reason his name isn’t ‘Supportive Guy Tracy.’” –picoxorsepulveda, on Bluesky
“A confused Joey thinks, ‘Wait. Is taking a selfish another phrase for going number 2? There’s so much to learn.’” –Hibbleton
“How fiendishly clever is that? Strap a mirror to your face and anyone who wants to shoot you or arrest is, at most extreme, ‘All right, come peacefully, me — I mean you — wait a minute…’ and at the very least they’ll hesitate for an uncomfortable ‘I can’t shoot this guy, there’s something I like about him’ moment.” –Handsome Harry Backstayge, Idol of a Million Other Women
“I feel like Margaret should be correct in an insufferable way, like ‘reminding the teacher they forgot to assign homework,’ not correct in a wholly relatable way, like ‘knowing that nobody wants to see a photo of Joey.’” –Dan
“Wa! Since I live on the floor and no one is watching me, that huge, heavy cookie jar at the edge of the counter could easily fall on my head! Which probably means the cabinet under the sink here with all the cleaning supplies doesn’t have a childproof lock, so at least I’ll get to taste something today!” –BigTed
“The bar floozy is sporting the rarely documented Viking Mullet. Pillaging in the front, party in the back!” –astroboy
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27 replies to “Metapost: C-O-T-W-T-O-G-O”
Springboard Shadow COTW
damnedpraise
October 12th, 2024 at 6:57 am Reply
@Josh: Mary Worth: His [Jimmy’s] spectral but furious presence would explain a lot of the bad vibes around that relationship.
——————————————————
I’m pretty sure that was just Wilbur.
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Special Long-form Shadow CsOTW
jroggs
October 15th, 2024 at 4:46 am Reply
Rex Morgan: Yvonne will be pleased to receive her weekly live performance of “Muddy Boots,” but most of this crowd is looking forward to hearing their favorite Truck Tyler songs, such as “That Day When You and I- Ow Fuck, My Finger!”, “The Road Keeps Calling M- Sweet Jesus, the Pain!”, and of course “Glenwood Mot- Aaaaaaauuuugh! Aaaaaaaauuugh! It Hurts So Bad, I Can’t Take It Anymore! Stop Clapping at My Suffering, You Dumpy Suburban Phony Country Fan Fucksticks! I Hope I Run Over Your Ugly Children with My Nissan Frontier! Fuck You! Aaaaaaauuuugh God, My Finger! (The Tralala Song).”
Morgan Wick
October 16th, 2024 at 6:51 am Reply
Slylock Fox: “Count Weirdly has launched his autonomous robot to the moon. Upon landing, the robot declared itself the ‘unified sovereign of this planetary body’. Why is Slylock Fox unimpressed by the robot’s declaration?”
(Of course, Slylock Fox wouldn’t get terms like this wrong. So congratulations: not only has the Phantom descended into Slylock Fox-style nitpicking, it’s not even as good at it as the original.)
Daily Shadow CsOTW
Saturday
————
Bob Tice
October 12th, 2024 at 4:34 am Reply
Mary Worth: “Jimmy had everything carefully planned so that we had a steady and robust stream of income coming in regularly. Then that nosy Serpico guy started poking around and ruined everything!”
Lauralot
October 12th, 2024 at 4:46 am Reply
Mary Worth: Libby wonders if she can stop this plot by shoving her whole head into Estelle’s mouth.
Sunday
———-
pugfuggly
October 13th, 2024 at 4:44 am Reply
Family Circus: I was sure that the answer was going to be something like “Reeky Rat, as the name suggests, is a filthy rodent who would never voluntarily bathe or shower, except maybe to cover up a crime.” But yeah, window consendation too, I guess.
Rosa
October 13th, 2024 at 7:41 am Reply
Mary Worth: I’m sorry Estelle, “sob” is not an answer.
Monday
———–
I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV
October 14th, 2024 at 5:16 am Reply
Snuffy Smith: Sure, Silas seems pleased with this new development, but look more closely. He’s just tripping balls on that bottle of spicy mustard on the counter. Who knew you could get such a great high from Dijon?
Voshkod
October 14th, 2024 at 6:25 am Reply
Mary Worth: Mary and Stell froze. The dog had just said ‘woof.’ Not barked, but clearly enunciated the word ‘woof.’ Both women started to slowly back away as, half a mile away, Wilbur cursed himself. “Half a million dollars on that dog bot, and I blew it by saying ‘woof,’” he thought in despair.
Tuesday
———–
TheDiva
October 15th, 2024 at 6:43 am Reply
Mary Worth: “Meow!”: What do you mean “maybe,” you dumb litter-scooper?
“Woof!”: “Thinking” is a very generous term for what happens in that rusty hamster wheel you call a brain.
Navigator
October 15th, 2024 at 9:29 am Reply
Gasoline Alley: To be fair to Sophie, “Milky Way” is a perfectly acceptable name for a candy bar and a pretty stupid name for a galaxy.
Wednesday
—————
Tabby Lavalamp
October 16th, 2024 at 5:38 am Reply
Gasoline Alley: “How can we write a report about something we don’t know about…?” Apparently you just need to throw on a mask and some skin-tight purple spandex and you’re golden.
Old School Allie Cat
October 16th, 2024 at 6:12 am Reply
Gasoline Alley: The little blonde girl looks like she’s wearing a wig made of McDonald’s french fries and banana peels. All three of the kids are creepier than the doll. The kids look like what happened when your Memaw decided to sew you a Cabbage Patch doll back in the 1980s, rather than give Xavier Roberts a dime of her hard-earned cigarette money.
Thursday
————
Violet
October 17th, 2024 at 9:11 am Reply
Dick Tracy: Dick could really amp up the contempt by looking into the villain’s face to adjust his tie and check his teeth for spinach.
GarrisonSkunk
October 17th, 2024 at 9:28 am Reply
Dirk Twacy2: Electric Shootaroo: In panel one I see Dirk has two fingers outstretched, guess he realized too late that MirrorMoron is immune to the Moe Howard Eye Attack™!
Friday
——–
BigTed
October 18th, 2024 at 4:45 am Reply
Hi and Lois: “Wa! Since I live on the floor and no one is watching me, that huge, heavy cookie jar at the edge of the counter could easily fall on my head! Which probably means the cabinet under the sink here with all the cleaning supplies doesn’t have a childproof lock, so at least I’ll get to taste *something* today!”
Cleveland Mocks
October 18th, 2024 at 5:51 am Reply
Mary Worth: Beaten down by the banality of it all, Libby somehow finds enough compassion to throw Estelle a pity Meow, as insincere as it is, but Pierre can’t even muster a Woof.
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Shadow COTW
——————
jroggs
October 16th, 2024 at 4:40 am Reply
Gasoline Alley: “I’m a magic doll! I can do anything!” “Can you fix our eyes so the villagers stop calling us hideous monsters and forming hunting parties to kill us?” “…I can do almost anything!”
Definitely one of those weeks when I don’t feel the equal of the fellow float-riders. Congrats BananaSam and all you funny people, and thanks for the mentions, Josh and Baja!
Thanks for the mention,Baja.
Thanks, Baja and Scratchy!
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
Hibbleton
October 12th, 2024 at 4:33 am Reply
H&L: Ditto changes his tune after Thurston lets out a long, loud beer fart. “You Rock!“
Peanut Gallery
October 12th, 2024 at 6:25 am Reply
Hi and Lois – That’s right, kids, Mr. Thurston isn’t winning anything. Except maybe peace, comfort, relaxation, and contentment, but who wants that? Now get out there and strive at some soul-killing job! Do all the work the rest of us are too old and tired to do! You want to WIN, don’t you?
Bob Tice
October 12th, 2024 at 4:34 am Reply
MW:
“Jimmy had everything carefully planned so that we had a steady and robust stream of income coming in regularly. Then that nosy Serpico guy started poking around and ruined everything!”
Lauralot
October 12th, 2024 at 4:46 am Reply
MW: Libby wonders if she can stop this plot by shoving her whole head into Estelle’s mouth.
MKay
October 12th, 2024 at 5:31 am Reply
MW: Touching story. But I’m not getting, “I love Ed and I don’t want him to die like my beloved husband.” I’m getting, “These selfish bastards are making me do everything BY MYSELF.”
jroggs
October 12th, 2024 at 5:40 am Reply
MW: I see we’ve reached the retcon memory hole part of the story. Estelle’s SOB!ing tantrums with Ed were purely selfish and absurdly malicious, but now Karen has remembered that Estelle is supposed to be a likable main character, so instead of becoming insanely furious that Ed tried to save the lives of dying newborn puppies and their mother, now Estelle is just compassionately concerned about Ed overworking himself. (Also Jimmy died in-universe like a couple months ago; god I hate Comic Time.)
ectojazzmage
October 12th, 2024 at 8:28 am Reply
Mary Worth: “You get that?” says Mary, staring directly at the audience. “She has a traumatic experience with hard-workers so she wasn’t just being a needy bitch bridezilla when she was pestering Ed about not giving her enough attention. Understand?”
Cleveland Mocks
October 12th, 2024 at 5:59 am Reply
MW: “Look, Estelle, I know how you can avoid making the same mistake again. Wilbur adores you, and he’s the laziest man I’ve ever met. You two will have plenty of time together. Of course, he’ll probably die of a heart attack too, but at least it won’t be from overwork. Think about it.”
I speak Jive
October 12th, 2024 at 7:50 am Reply
Mary Worth – “Immersion in his work” – time to recalibrate the human speech system again.
Flipper
October 12th, 2024 at 9:07 am Reply
MW: “Oh Mary, if Ed dies (SOB!) before we’re married, I’ll get nothing!”
BigTed
October 12th, 2024 at 4:41 am Reply
Mary Worth: I really don’t want to hear about Ed’s “heavy immersion” in his work, especially since his job probably involves dog suppositories.
Hagar: How rude! Everyone knows that you don’t start the orgy until the wine has been served.
Everything Is Better With Monkey
October 12th, 2024 at 4:47 am Reply
I think the guest strips written by Brooke McEldowney are my favourite Hagar the Horribles.
Schroduck
October 12th, 2024 at 4:58 am Reply
HTH: My wife’s grandma was from a remote corner of Ireland, and her “honeymoon” meant the couple being allowed to stay for a week in her aunt’s cottage in the same town. What I’m saying is, I fear this might be one of the more historically accurate Hagars.
Rule 34
October 12th, 2024 at 6:02 am Reply
HtH: The clothes being tossed in the 2nd panel indicate these 2 are fully naked. I have to admit it moved.
Activist
October 12th, 2024 at 8:14 am Reply
HtH:. Gosh, I’m glad Josh explained this strip. [“Hey, guys, want to read a Hagar the Horrible where some people walk into Hagar and Helga’s house and just start fucking? Well, uh, here you go.”] I just assumed all the things being tossed meant they were already fighting! I need to mudify my brain.
jroggs
October 12th, 2024 at 8:22 am Reply
@Activist: Yikes. Remind me never to pick a fight with you.
Tabby Lavalamp
October 12th, 2024 at 9:28 am Reply
At that moment, Helga and Hagar decided to embrace the stern, puritanical Christianity that was sweeping over Scandinavia.
ectojazzmage
October 12th, 2024 at 8:28 am Reply
Hagar The Horrible: Okay this is funny. No notes and kudos to the writer.
2+2=7
October 12th, 2024 at 8:49 am Reply
HAGAR THE HORRIBLE: Ha ha! It’s funny because the anachronistic legacy strip that’s just “The Flintstones, but in ancient Scandanavia” has a more progressive view on sexuality then “modern-age” Luann.
UncleJeff
October 12th, 2024 at 9:51 am Reply
HtH: Hat tip to the creators (do Hagar’s helmet horns still wiggle when he gets ‘horny’?)
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
Cleveland Mocks
October 12th, 2024 at 5:44 am Reply
GT: I’ll be damned! The Thorps have a milkman! Who apparently just leaves the milk out there for the Thorps to find whenever or if ever they look out the front door. I wonder if theirs is the only house on his route.
Also, the stress of his heart attack is such that Gil can’t be near his own phone. A jarring ring could trigger another one, so his phone must be kept on the other side of the house.
Finally, that chair looks like a prop from some old black-and-white Ming the Merciless movie.
CS: “Yes, I ruined my sister’s life! Just like one of you can!”
I speak Jive
October 12th, 2024 at 7:50 am Reply
Crankshaft – Please – never, never show that loathsome hag smirking again.
And when she was young and spiteful she ruined her sister’s life. (Apologies to @Cleveland Mocks: )
The Quiet Man
October 12th, 2024 at 6:38 am Reply
CS: It wouldn’t be a Batiuk storyline without a gratuitous swipe at ‘technology these days’. You mean to tell me the counter-protesters didn’t record themselves to try and counter the ‘book-banners’ narrative in the public eye?
Professor Well Actually
October 12th, 2024 at 5:56 am Reply
JP: to be fair to Declan there is that ass.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
Little Brown JugsSequiturOctober 12th, 2024 at 6:48 am Reply
Fred Basset Spanish to English.
“Jock, we’ve been friends for a while now and I’ve put up with your practical jokes.
“But this time you’ve gone too far.
“Why’d you put Tabasco sauce on my bone?”
Liam
October 13th, 2024 at 4:28 am Reply
FC-“Jeffy, did you unclasp my bra?”
Scott Christian Simmons
October 13th, 2024 at 4:51 am Reply
@Liam: I have never wanted to read a comic strip less than I want to read today’s FC after reading your comment.
GarrisonSkunk
October 13th, 2024 at 5:06 am Reply
@Liam: FC-“Jeffy, did you unclasp my bra?”
___________________________
by Joe Cocker?
nescio
October 13th, 2024 at 5:20 am Reply
HtH: No surprise that Lucky Eddie, the guy with a mermaid girlfriend, has no clue how to deal with beavers.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
The Quiet Man
October 13th, 2024 at 7:41 am Reply
MW: Waitaminute, is this the prelude to that infamous ‘very rare’ Mary Worth where she advises a friend to commit suicide??
“…and since you’ve thrown away the last man who’ll ever love you…and you irrationally refuse to take Wilbur back and enjoy his ‘endearing quirks’…there’s only one thing left that you can do…Isn’t that RIGHT, Estelle????”
Rosa
October 13th, 2024 at 7:41 am Reply
MW: I’m sorry Estelle, “sob” is not an answer.
Cleveland Mocks
October 13th, 2024 at 6:12 am Reply
MW: Mary, that’s BRILLIANT! How do you do that?! It’s like you added 2 plus 2 and came up with 4! You’re amazing!
The Rambling Otter
October 13th, 2024 at 9:53 am Reply
“Don’t pee on my hand and tell me it’s raining”
~Buddha (probably)
Hibbleton
October 14th, 2024 at 4:36 am Reply
H&L: Love Lois’ not so subtle “yank on this!” message to everyone upset about the renaming of Columbus Day to Indigenous Peoples day.
DtM: WTF!? It’s a great line, “My parents won’t do it so it’s up to us to make some kids,” but really out of place in a strip about a six-year old.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
MKay
October 14th, 2024 at 4:51 am Reply
RMMD: Mud’s rep is so on the line. If he so much as burps, mayhem ensues.
Bob Tice
October 14th, 2024 at 4:39 am Reply
MW:
“Pierre, this journeyman catcher — first name Phil — toiled in the big leagues for 16 years, primarily for Kansas City and Minnesota, and later served as bullpen coach for a variety of teams. What is his last name?”
“Woof!”
“Mary — the dog’s a genius!”
richardf8
October 14th, 2024 at 4:54 am Reply
MW – Ah, Sid, I see you took my advice and had Madi give Pierre some eyeroll coaching. That’s great because he really need that skill for today’s dtrip, and doing it safely is so important for a frenchie!
Weaselboy
October 14th, 2024 at 6:47 am Reply
MW – Pierre thinks you’re hot, Stell. Don’t limit your options.
Activist
October 14th, 2024 at 8:41 am Reply
JP:. Ned finally investigated! No more hearsay for her! She’ll get to the bottom of this Fluffy Pancake Caper.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
I speak Jive
October 14th, 2024 at 8:56 am Reply
FC – Jeffy turns to Billy. “And you say that I’M stupid.”
Seriously, does anyone play BINGO at home? That’s a church hall or fire department carnival thing.
Horace Broon
October 14th, 2024 at 11:01 am Reply
FC: HTT Grandma thinking “So, Thel’s got the kids hooked on gambling now?”
Violet
October 14th, 2024 at 10:00 am Reply
I wish I had Snuffy’s level of insouciance. I would feel self-conscious walking into a store with a can of live worms and asking for a sympathy card. Fuck it; now I kinda have to try it out.
jroggs
October 15th, 2024 at 4:46 am Reply
RMMD: Yvonne will be pleased to receive her weekly live performance of “Muddy Boots,” but most of this crowd is looking forward to hearing their favorite Truck Tyler songs, such as “That Day When You and I- Ow Fuck, My Finger!”, “The Road Keeps Calling M- Sweet Jesus, the Pain!”, and of course “Glenwood Mot- Aaaaaaauuuugh! Aaaaaaaauuugh! It Hurts So Bad, I Can’t Take It Anymore! Stop Clapping at My Suffering, You Dumpy Suburban Phony Country Fan Fucksticks! I Hope I Run Over Your Ugly Children with My Nissan Frontier! Fuck You! Aaaaaaauuuugh God, My Finger! (The Tralala Song).”
Cleveland Mocks
October 15th, 2024 at 5:38 am Reply
RMMD: “Play Shit-Stained Underpants!”
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
Baja Gaijin
October 15th, 2024 at 4:50 am Reply
Hi and Lois: Of course the blonde kids are excited to see the blond garbageman who they look exactly like and not at all like their “father.”. I’m not hinting that Lois had a couple of flings with him. I’m outright saying she boinked him and boinked him good.
Baja Gaijin
October 15th, 2024 at 4:54 am Reply
Mary Worth: Libby won’t dignify Estelle’s epiphany with a response. “Just look straight ahead and ignore the blathering idiot,” she thinks to herself.
The Quiet Man
October 15th, 2024 at 5:18 am Reply
MW: Aaaaannnndddd cue Eshtelle finding Dr. Mr. Ed humping Dr. Sheila Speak-N-Say right there on the examination table back at the clinic… ‘I thought we were on a break!’
Stacker
October 15th, 2024 at 9:55 am Reply
MW: So in all this time Dr. Ed has not made a single effort, none, to get back in touch? Hmmm … Maybe daddy’s happy the way things are. I’m glad she has her fur babies to sop up her sobs.
I speak Jive
October 15th, 2024 at 6:59 am Reply
Mary Worth – Moy buried the lede. How did Estelle get Libby into that sweater without having her face clawed off?
FC – It must be Holier Than Thou Grandma Week. She’s looking especially mushroom haired today.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
astroboy
October 15th, 2024 at 5:52 am Reply
DtM: “Your husband is really ugly, y’know” is more ” just plain mean” than “menacing” but I’ll take it.
seismic-2
October 15th, 2024 at 5:52 am Reply
DtM: Portrait of the young George Wilson
erdmann
October 15th, 2024 at 7:09 am Reply
@seismic-2: It’s been suggested here in the past that George is Dennis’ real father. “Dennis the Menace” launched in 1951 when Dennis was 6, meaning he was born in 1945. If Alice was a Hitler Youth who met SS-Obergruppenführer George after she eagerly joined the Lebensborn program, Dennis’ potential menace level just increased exponentially.
Tonio
October 15th, 2024 at 6:04 am Reply
Would the alternatives below for Dennis be more menacing or less?
1. Delivering that line to Mr. Wilson instead.
2. Telling Mr. Wilson that the young Mrs. Wilson was a hottie, going into graphic detail about the sexual acts Dennis would have enjoyed with her.
3. Same as #2 except delivered to Mrs. Wilson.
Professor Well Actually
October 15th, 2024 at 8:22 am Reply
JP: maybe, just maybe, Declan just wants to tap that ass.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
richardf8
October 16th, 2024 at 4:31 am Reply
BB – And Buxley Wednesday has her on her knees in front of the General.
Liam
October 16th, 2024 at 5:00 am Reply
Beetle Bailey-“Can you come back later? Ms. Buxley was going to adjust my belt.”
Noel
October 16th, 2024 at 8:12 am Reply
MW: I just caught up on Mary Worth and, I gotta say, all this dead husband stuff feels like ex post facto justification to me. “Oh, I was only ring-throwing-enraged about Ed skipping out of the wedding planning because I was worried about him working himself to death!” Uh-huh. I’m sure.
made of wince
October 16th, 2024 at 10:58 am Reply
When I think of Gasoline Alley readers, I picture 90 year old-plus folks chuckling over their newspapers in the community rooms of nursing homes. “By cracky, these girls are hilarious! Martha, wake up! Look at this! Hee hee hee! [slight wheezing] Ida Noe! What a knee slapper, eh? And they’re as cute as my great granddaughter!” But frankly, I could be wrong. Who likes this art, these jokes? Ida noe.
Poteet
October 16th, 2024 at 12:33 pm Reply
GA: I’m grateful I was able to unhook from 9CL a few years ago, because being unable to unhook from GA provides more than enough suffering. I know I will read this uberstupid planet-visiting story all the way through, so to get into the right mood, I shall now make one of my once-every-three-months-or-so visits to 9CL. *looks* YUCK. I see the magically-grown-up twins are no improvement on their awful mother. Sure enough, that’ll do until Christmas.
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
Horace Broon
October 16th, 2024 at 11:08 am Reply
RMMD: I can’t decide if it’s funnier if there’s exactly one “Swingset on the Moon” fan in the crowd, who has just realised there are no other “Swingset on the Moon” fans in the crowd, or if that’s actually Yvonne “We Want ‘Muddy Boots’!” Harwood, and she’s being extremely sarcastic.
pugfuggly
October 17th, 2024 at 4:39 am Reply
DtM: I’m always impressed with how this strip manages to keep its 60s suburban aesthetic into the modern day. Like sure, Margaret has a phone, but it looks like a spare piece off a Kodak Super 8.
BeckoningChasm
October 17th, 2024 at 4:32 am Reply
Dennis: Today’s strip written by Jeffy of “Family Circus” fame.
Schroduck
October 17th, 2024 at 4:55 am Reply
I didn’t think I had a least favourite type of Dennis the Menace, but I’ve just discovered do, and it’s when the kids are ignorant about something any actual child obsesses over. Dennis doesn’t know the word “selfie”? What, is he the world’s cutsiest, darnedest little 75-year-old?
But What Do I Know?
October 17th, 2024 at 6:32 am Reply
DtM — Dennis is upset that a girl is taking a picture of herself with her phone instead of taking a picture of him. Menace level: Patriarchal!
Ettorre
October 17th, 2024 at 6:42 am Reply
How can Dennis accuse Margaret of being obsessed with social media when his own strip adopted a Polaroid frame to maximise shareability on Instagram?!
Weaselboy
October 17th, 2024 at 6:58 am Reply
DtM – I wish Margaret had done a traditional selfie and pursed her lips. I’d be interested to see how Dennis would mispronounce “duckface.”
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
Hibbleton
October 17th, 2024 at 5:00 am Reply
Shoe: “Jimmy Hoffa,” well, there’s a timely reference. I believe I actually see where they whited out ‘Judge Crater.’
MKay
October 17th, 2024 at 5:01 am Reply
MW: Can’t wait for the back story that spawned Ed’s workaholism. Maybe he ran over a dog en route to a soiree. Whose trauma will triumph?
mstgator
October 17th, 2024 at 5:20 am Reply
MW: Gilbert O’Sullivan and Taylor Swift in the same strip? Moy’s Spotify playlist is starting to take shape…
Ukulele Ike
October 17th, 2024 at 6:12 am Reply
Blondie: How about bacon that looks like a donut?
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
Old School Allie Cat
October 17th, 2024 at 6:51 am Reply
H&L – I’d make a joke about a crusty tube sock, or lotion and tissues, but sadly, there’s no way Teen Rex could have made use of those items with his short, short arms.
Artist formerly known as Ben
October 17th, 2024 at 1:18 pm Reply
JP: Either Neddy believes that being fed shifty non-answers by her fiancé constitutes “a viable relationship” or she’s ready to throw a man over based solely on what his surly older brother says. Neither of these things make sense. She’s Schrodinger’s idiot.
Bob Tice
October 18th, 2024 at 4:35 am Reply
RMMD:
“Okay, a little off-topic, Lou, but I’m going as Andrew ‘Old Hickory’ Jackson for Halloween, and Mud here is going as Rutherford B. Hayes!”
Myrtle
October 18th, 2024 at 5:05 am Reply
RMMD: “We’re ready to roll, aren’t we, Mud?”
“Uh, you go ahead, Truck. I gotta go to the bathroom… real bad!”
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
Schroduck
October 18th, 2024 at 4:37 am Reply
HTH: Seahorses reproduce when the female squirts her eggs into the male’s pouch. Does mermaid intercourse work in a similar way? I don’t know, but it would be an alternative explanation for why Lucky Eddie needs a funnel.
Pozzo
October 18th, 2024 at 5:07 am Reply
I’m trying to decide if Hagar is surprised, confused, or just totally shit-faced in panel one.
I’m Not Cthulhu, But I’m Part of His Clique
October 18th, 2024 at 5:16 am Reply
Hagär the Horrible: Hey, good looking, whatcha got cooking? Oh, your brains, boiling from micro-fissures in your skull and out your prosthetic chimney-flue-like device? I guess, if you want to buy me a cocktail…
I’m Not Cthulhu, But I’m Part of His Clique
October 18th, 2024 at 5:18 am Reply
@I’m Not Cthulhu, But I’m Part of His Clique: “You’re no mermaid, but it’s closing time and my beer goggles are on. You’ll do.”
Weaselboy
October 18th, 2024 at 6:10 am Reply
HtH – Look at Hagar laughing at Eddie after he just got shot down. Worst wingman ever.
jroggs
October 18th, 2024 at 4:41 am Reply
H&L: Remember, parents, if your infant starts screaming in a panic, don’t panic and rush in blindly. First, make sure to change out of your nice red v-neck into an ugly old green t-shirt that you don’t mind getting filthy with various substances, such as… well, let’s call it what it is: baby blood.
UncleJeffers
October 18th, 2024 at 5:57 am Reply
H&L: It’s been proven that the sound of an infant crying can cause a woman to lactate involuntarily so maybe the reason why she had to change her shirt is because the syndicate wouldn’t let them show it dripping with breast milk?
BigTed
October 18th, 2024 at 4:45 am Reply
Pluggers: Wait, so this guy is only eating part of a bag of chips, and putting the rest away? Get lost, fake plugger!
Scratchy’s Scrotums of the Week
astroboy
October 18th, 2024 at 5:52 am Reply
Beetle Bailey is the only strip in history to name female characters (Buxley and Blips) after their bust sizes. In the interest of fairness, Walker-Browne Amalgamated should introduce new male characters General Halfdick and Major Hungg.
Cleveland Mocks
October 18th, 2024 at 5:51 am Reply
MW: Beaten down by the banality of it all, Libby somehow finds enough compassion to throw Estelle a pity Meow, as insincere as it is, but Pierre can’t even muster a Woof.
JP: Too bad Dwight Shrute wasn’t there to identify the wedding crashers.
Special Scrotal Awards to the Best No. 69 and Beyond of the Week
69. Ettorre
October 13th, 2024 at 9:08 am Reply
“Jimmy and I never lived out our dreams to travel the world because his heart gave out due to job stress. That’s not how it was meant to be! He was supposed to have a heart attack next to me while we climbed a monument in South-East Asia!”
69. Peanut Gallery
October 15th, 2024 at 7:39 am Reply
Don Abundio, translated:
“Is this a new technique?”
“Yes. Instead of paint I’m using Contadina tomato paste and parmesan cheese, on flatbread”
“Now it’s ready for a very special one-man show”
“Where?”
“First the refrigerator… Then in the oven tomorrow for lunch”
[With a tip o’ the hat to Stan Freberg’s classic radio commercials for Contadina tomato paste!]
69. 2+2=7
October 17th, 2024 at 7:53 am Reply
REX MORGAN M.D.: We know this time is better than their honeymoon cruise because it looks like Mr. and Mrs. Hardwood finally had their first post-nuptial orgasm.
Special Scrotal Awards to the Best No. 69 and Beyond of the Week
69. Ukulele Ike
October 18th, 2024 at 7:28 am Reply
HtH: As a helmet, that funnel thing certainly wouldn’t provide much protection during a broadsword attack. I always thought it was a yarmulke.
MW: The dog and cat have been anthropomorphizing over the last week — I hope the dream turns them fully into a pair of little humans, wearing little suits out of the Alice books.
Congrats to BananaSam and the floaters and thanks, Scratchy!
Congrats to all and thank you Scratchy!
2 weeks in a row! Thanks, Josh.
Thanks Scratchy!! :3
Thanks Scratchy.
Thank you, Scratchy!