Archive: General

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Well, well, well … looks like it’s that time again … comment of the week time, that is:

“I, for one, always type my scam emails with my fingers held beyond the keyboard itself. Palm-typing, I call it. I make a lot of typos, but that’s unrelated.” –Lauralot

Also time for these hilarious runners up!

“They’re not removing their glasses for comfort. They want to be sure they don’t accidentally see each other.” –Nevin, on Patreon

“I was looking forward to Rustic Romance. But, depending on how desperate Lorna is to keep incognito, I could settle for Homespun Homicide.” –MKay

“I’m sorry, I’m not buying that ‘Fergus Murphy’ and ‘Mae Mae Clodfelter’ are from the same town or whatever. Pick a down-home, banjo-pluckin’ rural background and run with it, you can’t do Co. Kerry and West Virginia.” –Dan

“Henrietta. Get yourself to the best chicken doctor around. If your rhamphotheca is that rubbery, you’re at high risk of necrosis of the periosteum. Do you want to lose your upper and lower mandibles?” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“In happier times, Loretta used to joke that if she replaced the bread tag with a twist tie, then Leroy would starve to death. Yet now, years later, she can’t even find satisfaction in being proven right.” –Guts Dozier

“Anyway, it turns out fleas really like these big antique oak drawing boards and will pay top dollar. They use them for parade grounds, combat exercises, and basic training camps. Not sure why they’re readying themselves for conquest. Also not sure where they’re getting their dollars, but they spend just as good as any other blood-stained buck.” –Voshkod

“Power move of Thirsty to wait until they both got to the office to tell Hi this.” –matt w

Head count? Complete heads or pieces as well?! Ha, I kid, but seriously, I think we just committed a war crime out there.” –pugfuggly

“Is this supposed to be an episode of sci-fi where we feel sympathy for a child who will never grow up because she realizes that there might be a more sinister aspect to what she perceives as a friendly beam of light from a sun in the early stages of going nova? That, or two dull suburbanites discussing setting the thermostat? I’m going with the former.” –Hibbleton

“I hate today’s strip for two reasons — first, for being so weird that I felt compelled to look back to work out what the hell is going on (Why is everyone writing on paper and talking about what type of animal they are? Why is R.E.A.R. stamped on the book cover? Are they playing some weird furry sex version of D&D?), and secondly for being a complete letdown when I actually went back to check. It’s so dull I’m not even going to bother explaining it, which is not how you should describe the set-up to the phrase ‘I’m a Neon-Cliff-Fox and I’m good at rappelling!’” –Schroduck

“‘That loud machine is interfering with my enjoyment of all the loud machines’ is certainly … what’s above a first-world problem?” –Vice President John Adams

“Where’s your leaf blower? I’ve got a better question: How come you have what appears to be a half-car garage?” –Weaselboy

“There’s no project. This dude just sets up that table and laptop and spouts vague work vernacular. It’s always encouraging, though. How did he know Alice’s name? Oh, he knows all the names. Like a muffin?” –A Grave Mind

“‘What turned you around?’ ‘Oh, that’s a long story. And it’s about to get even longer!’” –Bob Tice

“I’ve always assumed that, in keeping with its art style, Alice was always meant to be some sort of vague, unsettling, Eastern-European version of expressionist morality play. If we were to continue following this particular episode, we’d see Alice retreat into her office, with her name and a job title like ‘Happiness Injector’ on a plaque, only to find her inside vivisecting kittens while off-key circus music plays in the background. As the camera dollies closer to her, she’d pause, look at the audience, and say, ‘Well, where did you think marshmallows came from?’ as the image dissolves into a clip of an atomic bomb exploding.” –Glarryg

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Heathcliff, 6/17/25

There are few characters in the comics whose energies are so distinct from one another as Heathcliff and Wilbur Weston, despite the fact that they have remarkably similar body plans. Contrast today’s panel with Wilbur’s drawn-out, over-the-top fish funeral. Sure, Heathcliff mourns. You think he doesn’t mourn for that hot dog, lost forever to the bosom of the sea? But he does it with the sort of quiet dignity that Wilbur has never gotten within a mile of.

Crankshaft, 6/17/25

Crankshaft had two daughters: Pam, who he lives with, and Chris, who lives in the big city and who he visits every once in a while, presumably when he gets the sense that Pam might murder him if he doesn’t get out of town for a little bit. Anyway, you’d think living far away would allow Chris to develop a more independent personality, distinct from her family, but today we learn that making terrible, unfunny malaprops is a tragically genetic condition.

Shoe, 6/17/25

What I really like about this one is that Biz’s facial expression in panel two makes it very clear that he’s flirting.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 6/17/25

“So how does this work? Is a guy with calipers gonna come by and measure our skulls, or do I just jerk off into a cup?”

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Shoe, 5/23/25

This strip would be — well, not funny, exactly, but it would at least make some sort of sense if the Perfesser was married, which to the best of my knowledge (derived from a literal lifetime of reading the syndicated newspaper comic strip Shoe, oh my god I’ve wasted my life) he … isn’t? Unless his wife is unseen and unmentioned, and living in some room in his home that nobody goes into, which would make that already depressing house way way more depressing.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 5/23/25

TIRED: In the absence of defense attorneys, the government’s police power will range unchecked, with the regime being able to put disfavored individuals into prison on a whim

WIRED: “I would prefer not to go to jail” is an impulse for which a rational market exists, and if market participants are willing to expend resources to fulfill that desire, even in the absence of defense attorneys, someone will step up to provide a counterparty

Archie, 5/23/25

I love how shocked and indignant Pops looks in the third panel here. How can you young people just let your days slip away from you like this, without drinking in every minute of your wild and precious teenagerhood? You’ve got to live, kids, live!

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