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Mark Trail, 11/10/04

Mark already has two women in pink polo shirts hot for him — so why not add a third? He hasn’t even been there for 10 minutes and he’s already hearing about how busy Birdie’s husband is with his work … leaving Birdie lonely … so lonely … are you sure I can’t get you more … tea? I’m sure we’ve all seen enough adult entertainment to know where this is going.

In the next day’s strip, we learn that Birdie’s husband’s name is Barracuda. No, really, Barracuda. I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried. I’m not sure how that affects the Mark Trail-as-porno concept I’ve got going on here. I’m just putting it out there. Barracuda.

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Mark Trail, 10/30/04

I’m not the first to note this, but Jack Elrod doesn’t seem to like drawing people very much. Maybe that’s why everyone in Mark Trail looks the same. Whenever he can, he pulls back the “camera” to give us some lovely frolicking animal shots. Unfortunately, his word balloons are often nowhere near the tiny, distant humans who are supposed to be saying said words, so it usually looks like the animals are conversing among themselves. For instance, there’s no other normal way to interpret today’s strip but to assume that the leftmost bird is proposing a quick trip to the Florida Keys. At least it isn’t talking to the dolphins, though; as near as I can tell, the reply is coming from the boat itself. I’m not sure if that’s more or less realistic.

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Mark Trail, 10/23/04

I’m very much looking forward to seeing this whole bunch on a future episode of Ricki Lake entitled “Bitch, I’m-a steal your man!” At last, the artifact-wrangling is taken care of and now the cat-fighting can begin. Cherry may have a porn star’s name, but she clearly has a thing or two to learn about keeping a man satisfied. When your boyfriend has just snagged an evil artifact-smuggler with nothing more than an ordinary fishing line (an act so at odds with the known laws of physics that it wasn’t even depicted in the strip) you don’t just tell him he “did good”; you slobber all over him and ask him to tell you some fascinating facts about migratory birds, if you know what I mean (and I think you do). At least Cherry and Kelly are on a level playing field in terms of attire: they’re both wearing matching pink polo shirts, presumably because they know they make Mark hot.

Meanwhile, I’m beginning to suspect that Mark’s fishing buddy “Bill” is actually Slate magazine founder Michael Kinsley.