Archive: Mark Trail

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Mary Worth, 11/10/19

It feels almost churlish to complain about a week of Mary Worth that has brought us so much joy, climaxing in today’s strip in which Wilbur drunkenly karate-chops a full wine glass into Iris — if only the technology existed to render this in Wachowski-style bullet time! — and then he and Zak compete for the right to daub her soiled bosom. But I have to admit that throughout this whole thing, I don’t quite have a sense of Zak’s character. Is he as charming and guileless as he seems? When Wilbur decides to show his hip bona fides by proclaiming his love for a twenty-year-old film, is Zak’s response that it was father’s favorite movie meant to twist the knife? Or is he really cheerfully relating his own connection to the now-classic, with no ulterior motive? Either way, it’s going to make Wilbur die inside, of course, but I find myself wanting to know the precise texture of his pain, for probably obvious reasons.

Mark Trail, 11/10/19

“This has led to an increase in animal density in forested areas, resulting in some tigers venturing outside in search of a meal, and, tragically, that means conflict with humans. That seemed like a real downer to draw, honestly. Wouldn’t you rather see a tiger fighting an alligator? No idea if that has any scientific basis, but it sure sounds metal as hell.”

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Mark Trail, 11/9/19

Genie isn’t just a font of fun Nepal facts, guys! She also understands and respects the privacy rights we all have under HIPAA.

Family Circus, 11/9/19

Ha ha, look at Ma Keane’s face, you guys. “Sounds like a real firetrap!” That’s what finally snuffed out her will to live.

Dennis the Menace, 11/9/19

Damn it Mr. Wilson, unless Dennis is deliberately trying to cut through a gas line, or digging a little torso-sized grave for a dismembered torso, you are way overstating things here.

Pajama Diaries, 11/9/19

Meanwhile, over in Pajama Diaries, everyone is achingly starved for physical affection! Ha ha, what a pleasant thing to read about, in the funny papers!

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Mark Trail, 11/8/19

Sorry I haven’t kept you up to date on what’s been going on in the month since Mark and Dr. Camel and their crew got attacked by a rhino, but honestly trust me when I say that it hasn’t been that interesting! There was an elephant ride but even that was more boring than it sounds, and as you can see they’re still in Nepal’s semi-tropical lowland zone and not in the rugged, mountainous region, which I assume is infested with yeti. Sorry, Mark Trail, you can’t promise me yeti and then just show me a bunch of boring-ass animals I can see in any zoo and expect me to remain engaged! In today’s strip, Genie desperately tries to liven things up by giving everyone cholera, but Mr. Mark “No Fun” Trail is gonna put a stop to even that.

Mary Worth, 11/8/19

An underrated thing about human beings — which is often borne out by, say, the oeuvre of Sacha Baron Cohen — is that we try our hardest to maintain illusion that everything is going fine and normally even when one participant in a social situation is behaving bizarrely and inappropriately. I both appreciate and find it fairly realistic that Zak, Estelle, and Iris are cheerfully going around the table saying what they liked about their meal while Wilbur is literally smearing himself with noodles. It’s magnificent.

Six Chix, 11/8/19

Sorry, I refuse to believe that this supposed slacker would have a framed picture hanging at a weird angle but then leave his cans neatly placed upright on the floor. And what are you going to stain your shirt with that’s grey? I feel like he’s protesting a little too much, like he wants a girlfriend who’s going to whip him into shape, literally, as part of some slovenliness dom/sub play.

Dennis the Menace, 11/8/19

So … instead of pretending to do yard work, you’re instead going to pretend to have a big dispute at the condo board meeting about the various estimates on what it’s going to cost to fix the elevator? I think we can agree both of these games suck ass.