Post Content

Folks, your comment of the week in a moment, but first … if you are a paid subscriber to the site, you might be seeing some emails asking your to reset your password that you didn’t initiate. It seems some bots are knocking on the door to the site by initiating password resets. There’s nothing they can really do that would be bad, and I’m trying to figure out how to stop the annoyance, but in the meantime don’t click on anything in those emails, is my advice, but do send me a note if you get one for my information.

ANYWAY, with that high-tech info out of the way, here’s this week’s comment of the week!

“Hi spent the day trying to hang himself with his tie, so he’s probably not up for Date Night.” –MKay

And the very funny runners up!

“A different comic strip might’ve taken this idea and did something kind of fun with it, like show old versions of the character or show a similar character from another comic strip. Maybe time it to run on an anniversary and have some tongue-in-cheek joke about, ‘Boy, wouldn’t it be crazy if I looked like that!’ The Blondie creative team decided to make everyone deeply uncomfortable and unsettled instead. On the upside, this might drive some traffic to my Dagwood-themed DeviantArt page.” –ComicallyChallenged

“The third ‘AI’ image of Dagwood clearly shows the Mark of the Beast. Only the computer can see the true depths of his evil, the unlimited sin of gluttony.” –Voshkod

“Don’t worry, Toby, these unfaithful hybrids of bird and man will get what’s coming to them — parrots aren’t adapted to long-distance flight like, say, albatrosses, so their attempt to fly to Maui will undoubtedly end with them falling into the ocean and drowning due to exhaustion.” –Vulpes

“Nobody wants Dagwood to get plastic surgery — and the chewing gum that’s supposed to make your jawline sharper doesn’t really work. But that hair? You know you can just go to a slightly better barber and get a better haircut, right, Dagwood? You really don’t have to live that way!” –BigTed

“It’s a board game. They use electrified tweezers and if they touch the sides, his nose lights up. Hilarity ensues. Seriously, it’s been around for over fifty years and you haven’t heard about it?” –Where’s Rocky.

“Apparently Hi is low enough on the corporate ladder that Foofram only checks in on him at 2 P.M.” –Maltmash3r

“I have questions: (1) Is murder illegal in Norway? (2) Does killing an arms dealer count as murder in Norway? (3) Norway has a huge arms industry. Were the murdered arms dealers permitted by Norway to deal arms, i.e., were they legitimate businessmen or ‘legitimate businessmen’? (4) Does Norway recognize varying degrees of homicide based on the criminal status of the victim, i.e., does Norway excuse vigilantism? (5) If so, is the criminal status of the victim determined before or after the murder? (6) Does murdering arms dealers violate the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act of 1977? (7) With a population of 5.6 million and murder rate of 0.72 per 100,000 people as of 2023, is there a clinically depressed detective inspector in currently investigating an anomalous spike in murders over the past few months? (8) What are the diplomatic and legal implications if the United States, knowing who the murderer is, refuses to extradite the murderer per its treaty with Norway? Asking for a legal-themed newspaper comic strip that might want to just shift focus back to traffic scofflaws.” –Charterstone: Dune

“Mother Goose, who knows that her dogs are incipient fascists and also pets who cannot legally make purchases, has wisely set up a backwards treadmill so they can’t progress past the beige rectangle.” –matt w

“Nothing can save the ‘joke’ in today’s Mother Goose and Grimm, but it helps that Grimm himself looks horrified across both panels at the words coming out of his mouth. Perhaps, like Nikki in Obsession, on some level this dog realizes that the thoughts that dictate his behavior are not actually his own. Grimm, indeed!” –Kevyn on Video

“Come up with a passable pun on ‘fascism’ or ‘dictator’ but find Hitler is too charged a name to use as a setup for anodyne wordplay? Well that’s where Mussolini comes in! Mussolini: real bad guy, slightly less famous for it!” –BananaSam

“Ms. Blips did not sign up for making coffee! She signed up for war crimes! And healthcare! But mostly war crimes!” –Ettorre

“Women, amirite? Always wanting to spend time with you, enjoying a tasty meal in a pleasant atmosphere, when all you really want is the sweet release of alcohol and/or death! Hi and Lois, the comic about bipolar disorder, delivers another rueful chuckle and/or primal scream of bone-deep suffering. It’s funny because we each live in a hell of our own making!” –a.

“I could confront Ian, but that would be too rational. It’s better I look ‘strong’ and ‘independent’ by sitting passively by until I’m overcome with doubt and worry. Yes, that plan just makes too much sense!” –2+2=7

“‘Its just high school sports, why would I get emotionally invested in that?’ Good question Gil Thorp, very good question.” –pugfuggly

“Jughaid is getting too big for his britches, and Loweezy has two options to rein him back into reality: deliver a lecture on the environmental impact of the many rockets now used for smaller, routine missions to guilt him out of his dream, or try to build a soundstage of the moon in an old barn. Some nonzero percentage of Hootin’ Holler probably see the moon landing as being staged, so she could get some help setting it up, as long as it’s for a practical joke on Jughaid.” –InvasionOfTheZIM

“Gertie was very disappointed to learn that Carson isn’t called that because he’s literally the son of a car. Turns out it’s biologically impossible for a motor vehicle to impregnate you, and that’s why Gertie doesn’t have children.” –Schroduck

“He wants a trip to the moon but we can only afford a $460,000 ticket on a non-orbital flight from Virgin Galactic. It sucks being poor.” –Hibbleton

“Mr. Weatherbee was right to purchase the combination spring-loaded toupee-and-tie combo for those times when he has to react to Archie’s hilarious shenanigans. Sure, he could have also sprung for the wacky ‘leaping pince-nez,’ but that would have been putting a hat on a hat, you know? Sometimes you have to know when less is more.” –Chance

“I would have been wary of moving into an apartment with an unlockable swing door, but maybe that’s just me. I’m wacky that way.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“I’ve been reading this blog for many years, which means I’ve also been getting occasional updates on Luann for many years. Theoretically, I should know who most of the main characters are and how they live. But I don’t. I just don’t. For instance, I have no idea who or what ‘Tara’ is in this context. Is the dark-haired guy with glasses housesitting for actress Tara Reid? Or are they all somehow living in the famous, fictional Tara plantation from Gone With the Wind?” –Joe Blevins

“Jughead is wisely displaying a mati, the Greek talisman against misfortune and the evil eye, in order to prevent Moose’s baleful gaze from falling upon him. Sadly Archie has taken no such precautions.” –TheDiva

Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber! You can get each day’s post ad-free via Patreon if that’s your style! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my tip jar! Thanks to all for your support and readership!

Post Content

That’s right, daddy-o: The COTW is here, and it’s sick (complimentary):

“Goddammit, Mud, this is Glenwood! If you don’t think it can support an off-brand Alamo Drafthouse, you haven’t been paying attention to all the men with muttonchops ’round these parts!” –Tabby Lavalamp

The runners up are also totally awesome:

“I wouldn’t be surprised if both of these toddlers were surprisingly athletic — it takes a lot of core strength to sit on a backless stool like that without falling over.” –BigTed

“People said I was crazy to open a store that sold nothing but gum and then just call it Gum. And, sure, it depleted my bank account and cost me my family. Well, look at me now! There’s a line of six people waiting to get into Gum. Because this is the place that weird cat did that weird thing!” –Joe Blevins

“In a world of unrelenting change, it is nice to know there are a few constants, such as newspaper comics being completely and laughably unable to make topical references on-time instead of months after the topic has begun sliding off the radar.” –ectojazzmage

“I feel as if every new Rex Morgan storyline could start with the phrase ‘What does this have to do with anything?’ and we’ll only get the answer about half the time.” –pugfuggly

“You claim this is a new recipe, but this is just a mixture of proteins, carbs, and condiments, most of which you have used in previous meals! When are we going to get something radically different, like tasting solar plasma or a pure concept?!?!” –Ettorre

“All right, forensics says he was floating three feet above the stairs at an oblique angle, stiff as a board! How’d he get that way? Is he clip art? We’ve got a lot of questions and no answers!” –Victor Von

“I think the question on many minds is, how does a story line about an old movie house become medical? I have a theory. Two words: Popcorn Lung.” –Old School Allie Cat

“A plugger has not, in fact, mastered cutting his hair.” –Vulpes

“‘How hard can it be?’ If you decide to self-neuter, then you might be a plugger.” –GarrisonSkunk

“A brand new multiplex!? In 2026!? I guess there are a few advantages to living in the remote corners of the country that have still yet to receive rural broadband. (The main disadvantage is of course all the roots country you have to hear.)” –Schroduck

“I find it difficult to believe that the Wilsons use tiny umbrellas for everyday drinks. Too much whimsy. Martha probably put it in George’s drink to symbolically emasculate him, and gave him a straw to remind him that he sucks.” –nescio

“This kid’s mom knows he exists and she still lets him play video games with Dustin?” –matt w

“Toby understands Ian cheating on her — he was essentially cucked by her parrots, and would seek emotional validation elsewhere. But her newfound public persona as ‘bird savior’ is being undercut by the rumors. She either has to confront Ian and Mary, or else get a large bird like an ostrich or emu.” –Cab

“‘Was I not on my best behavior?’ ‘It’s not that — you just sucked.’” –Pozzo

“Just die already. Between you, Pluggers, and most of the cast of Crankshaft, it’s like you’re humblebragging about your inexplicable longevity.” –Banana Jr. 6000

“3D printing is just much, much more resource demanding per unit than making moulds to mass produce your plastic action figures. I think what this strip is trying to say is there’s not enough mass market appeal to make Blondie figures commercially viable.” –Amelie W

“‘Tough day?’ ‘Yeah, the boss still won’t get the break room TV fixed. We’re stuck on same channel all the time, and it’s not a good one. It’s called the Set-up Channel, and all it does is broadcast weird holiday factoids, recipes, and inane blabber.’” –Voshkod

Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber! You can get each day’s post ad-free via Patreon if that’s your style! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my tip jar! Thanks to all for your support and readership!

Post Content

The gorgeous fall weather is arriving (your geoclimatic mileage may vary), so let’s enjoy it, and this comment of the week:

“Wow, good for Mother Goose — I’m so glad she’s finally living her truth! Now if only we could learn the truth about her alleged motherhood, or whatever nightmare creature she actually is because last time I checked geese don’t have enormous angular brow crests or shark fins(?) coming out of their heads? At least now we know her posterior head triangle is actually hair, which geese also don’t have.” –Manjack

Your runners up are also autumnally fantastic!

“Are the Crankshaft characters insulting their creator’s own art? This is a direction I could really enjoy.” –Nevin, on Patreon

“The funniest bit of this to me is that fact that Leroy and Loretta seem to be completely alone in there. It’s hard to imagine what kind of behaviour would clear out a bowling alley, but if anyone could do it, these two could.” –pugfuggly

“Sorry, not only do I not want to think of my carpet as being sentient, the thought of it having vision is absolutely terrifying. Full disclosure: I am nude sometimes. I have not found a way yet to change my underwear without getting into that state. Do I need to start rolling out a floor-sized blindfold to hide my shame from the Berber voyeur in my bedroom?” –Tabby Lavalamp

“Some people say baseball is a slow, boring game, but give credit where it’s due, it’s a drug-free means of curing Hi’s insomnia in the throwaway panel.” –Philip

“What I love most about this is that a) that text box gives us way too much information and b) that information doesn’t even seem to be correct? I mean, is she putting mail on his desk, or pulling a (hopefully pre-opened) credit card bill from the middle of the [squints] notebook corral? Also, side note, but Toby — I know the print isn’t the biggest on those things, but that paper is two and a half centimeters from your face, so maaaaaaybe it’s time to visit an optometrist. Better or worse, Toby? Better or worse?!” –els

“Yesterday’s strip was the first time I noticed how low on his face Hi’s eyes are. Now when I look at him, it’s all I can see! That man’s visage is at least 40% forehead!” –Victor Von

“Now that a critical mass of newspaper comic strips have touched upon AI, it’s probably a good time to wager on the ol’ economic bubble popping in a matter of days.” –InvasionOfTheZIM

“That’s not football, Alexander. That’s someone’s innovative variant on the clingfilm fetish. You’ll be famous!” –matt w

“Crazy to think we got a ‘Toby thinks Ian is cheating because she heard a rumor’ plot before an ‘Ian thinks Toby is cheating because she is married to Ian and who could blame her’ plot.” –Dan

“I’d like to think that panels 1 and 2 are unrelated, and Toby is just horrified because she remembered that Mary exists.” –Mr. A

“We were taking in the fall colours — literally taking them in! We’ve absorbed them all, draining them between Sunday and now, and only we can enjoy them! Bwa ha haa! Have fun in the dull boring green world while we’re looking inwards at gold and ruby-tinged nature!” –CanuckDownSouth

“He’s also got two different copies of The Watchtower to give us, Mommy, if you’ve just got a moment to listen to him!” –A Grave Mind

“Thel looks exactly the way you’d expect from a housewife from the early 1960s hearing about divorce for the first time. ‘You mean I can just … end my marriage, and everyone will be okay with that? Why didn’t I hear about this sooner?’” –TheDiva

“‘What brings you to the PARK!?’ ‘We were just enjoying the GRATUITOUS BOLDING!!!’” –Peanut Gallery

“In comics, characters rarely age or change. Gertie will remain in stasis, even as the memory of Dale Earnhardt recedes further and further into the past. There will come a time when the comic strip (produced by Mike Smith’s grandchildren or the AI content creators of GG Humor Amalgamated Inc.) depicts Gertie worshiping a race car driver who died before she was born. At that time, it will appear that she is longing for the days when NASCAR competitors were human beings rather than self-driving machines.” –Danny

“Wedding crashers Gerads and Darby have been the talk of the town. People have so many questions. Which one is which? Are they gay? Who does that blond guy think he’s fooling with that long hair when we can see that he’s balding on top, where it counts? What kind of pathetic loser crashes a wedding to intimidate a high school football coach? Yes, they’ve got people talking, all right!” –Joe Blevins

“Kudos to Brigman for having the evil parrot, El papagayo siniestra, depart from Toby’s left shoulder. It’s this level of attention to detail that pushes the suspension of disbelief.” –Hibbleton

“The Phantom’s first panel is funnier if you picture Mollusk sitting in a giant car seat.” –lynn

Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber! You can get each day’s post ad-free via Patreon if that’s your style! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my tip jar! Thanks to all for your support and readership!