“You have to wonder about the parents who remain in line with their children. They can see, right? They know what awaits them at the front of the line, correct? ‘Just twenty more minutes, Tyler, and you can be the one awkwardly perched on the lab of the unsettling pizza box automaton.’” –Joe Blevins

“Henry wears a lot of layers for just reading the paper at home. Maybe he’s one of those low-thermostat guys (laudable).” –Joe Friday I’m In Love, on Bluesky

“Writers advise avoiding ‘shoe leather,’ the depiction of how characters get from one scene to the next. Just go straight from one interesting part to the other, they advise. These writers never had to fit a two-panel joke into a Sunday strip.” –matt w

“One of my peeves is comics that mix speech balloons for adult humans with thought balloons for animals and babies yet both supposedly work as communication with others so I guess we’re to assume that horrifying telepathy exists in these worlds and nobody says anything about it. However, if a thought balloon was just a thought balloon, it makes this comic actually amusing if it’s just a bartender staring at the dog sitting at his bar with a big stupid grin on its face, unaware that its joke wouldn’t make sense even if anyone could hear it.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“Look at that smile and sudden healthy glow in the third panel, we’re about to launch into Gil Thorp’s Day Off.” –Charles Louis Richter, on Bluesky

“That’s some look on Hi’s face in the last panel. He knows he’ll surely die if he sticks around to watch this racy(?) action-packed(?) film, but he’s going to anyways. It’s like if they made The Ring for middle-aged dads.” –pugfuggly

“Thor lives in the emptiest cave ever half-imagined into existence. Get some rock-based furniture, a fire pit, some skins, guano, anything to liven the place up!” –Victor Von

“I don’t blame Ian for being upset. After all, Othello’s autograph is pretty rare.” –seismic-2

“You have to respect Sunny’s ability to distinguish Ian’s possessions from Toby’s. Though maybe Toby put all her stuff safely away a couple days ago, when she realized parrots have no bowel control.” –Ken

“‘Sir Richard Wellbottom’ sounds like an adult film star who specializes in Shakespeare parodies: Much Ado About Pegging, King Leer, Romeo and Juliet and Rosaline…” –TheDiva

“If there’s one thing Herb loves, it’s staring off into the middle distance while making smug faces for no reason as a mysterious omnipotent narrator rambles incoherently.” –ectojazzmage

“Some might point out that Ian’s accusation doesn’t really imply the bird can read at all, as there’s a number of simpler ways a parrot could notice an association between the Playbill and Ian. However, that actually makes Toby’s accusation itself logically consistent, as she herself can’t read and assumes that Ian’s daily wistful stroking of the cover is what constitutes the act.” –NotImportant

“Of course birds can’t read! But Othello is a play, they just need to listen and watch it! Think, Toby, think!” –Ettorre

“Due to the scrawly font I misread ‘platforms’ as ‘flatworms’ and, honestly, I think it was an improvement. Alice would at least have an opinion on those.” –Hergen

“And so the fumbling attempt to unionize Dithers & Co comes to an abrupt end. The workers shouldn’t have picked a foreman who’d sell them out not even for spare ribs, but for the idea of spare ribs.” –Schroduck

“Augie should just explain to Summer that, in accordance with their namesake seasons, she is hot and boring whereas Autumn is cool and interesting.” –Violet

“I choose to believe that the “squawk” box in the last panel is also part of Ian’s dialog.” –Dmsilev

“Ok, that’s all good and well, but why is he eating outside? Turkey farts? Probably turkey farts.” –pugfuggly

“He’s depressed in advance about how much pie he’s going to lose in that beard.” –MKay

“Humpty didn’t crack open his fellow carton-mate, but he did feast on the albumeny innards of the predeceased, a crime so heinous they have no law against it.” –Rex Thrillho, on BlueSky

“Dustin has embraced his inner Crankshaft, God help us all.” –TheSodorViaduct, on BlueSky

“We see these occasional departures where the strip explores the lives of popular nursery rhyme characters. Is the titular Mother Goose telling these stories to entertain children? Or, since we’ve never seen her with any kids, does she make these stories up to ward off children? Probably the latter, right?” –Victor Von

“I’ve never seen an egg-human with such a small face before. Not clear why I find this vaguely unsettling.” –some guy vaguely unsettled by a cartoon of an egg

“That look on Augie’s face is perfect for someone who has tried over and over to explain the concept of a fictional character inspired by a real person. ‘Please don’t ask for details. You said yourself that she’s smart. I don’t want to admit that that’s one of the differences.’” –Nevin, on Patreon

“You got any six-day old food? Does your disgusting filthy restaurant have any meat that’s just been sitting around since last Thursday? I don’t want to go to work tomorrow, and a bit of violent food poisoning would do the job nicely.” –Schroduck

“Listen, when I texted you ‘semiotic theory and chill?’ this is not what I had in mind.” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“I enjoy Dick Tracy helpfully providing a balloon labeled ‘machine gun.’ They need to go the full nine here, though! ‘Dick Tracy’s Hand!’ ‘Cigarette!’ ‘Thinking Cop’s Chin!’ Oh, the possibilities!” –A Grave Mind

“I struggle to believe that cars in the Alice-verse are that expensive. I mean, they’d just be made out of vague abstract shapes like everything else in this comic.” –ectojazzmage

“Well, you’re certainly a plugger if you read your mail while standing by your mailbox, as opposed to, say, walking a few feet into the comfort of your own home where you can sit down; it’s easier to read; there’s a letter opener; etc.” –Bob Tice

“TIRED: Wilbur is bad at raising a pet
WIRED: Ian emerges menacingly from the mist to visit his wrath upon a pet” –Dan

“I’d be more upset about Jeffy pulling her coat down off her neck to ogle her nape. Probably why Thel wears a turtleneck in the house.” –Hibbleton

“Look at that disaster! Wishing well? More like wishing badly!” –Ettorre

“I’m intrigued by Jeffy’s odd facial expression and posture. I can only assume he’s imitating long-dead variety show host Ed Sullivan, which would be spot-on for this strip.” –Joe Blevins

“In an attempt to stay relevant, Heathcliff has adopted Netflix’s strategy of having characters explain everything that’s happening in detail so that viewers can still keep up with the plot while being glued to their phones. Tomorrow’s caption: ‘The stench of rotting meat has attracted the Beings, and we are all in grave danger.’” –Austria

“Isn’t it obvious? Ozob is planning on creating hybrid clown/vampire car technology. When you open the door, infinite vampires pour out and usher in a new age of darkness and despair for the world. A world full of despair is the ultimate bull market in the business of clowning!” –RoofPig, on Patreon

“Interesting choice of quote in the throwaway panel. I’m assuming this is about Toby not carrying the burden of the past (i.e., the horrible conditions her bird escaped from) or worrying about the madness of the future (Ian absolutely losing it when he comes back to an apartment strewn with sunflower shells and bird shit).” –pugfuggly

“If that coffee spout was about six inches lower, the tragedy wouldn’t be that former movie star R2D2 turned to retail, it would be that he turned to sex work.” –Where’s Rocky?

“‘My best friend is leaving!’ As he’s your only friend, you’re technically correct.” –ValdVin

“Sonny has spent the last two weeks trying to keep Toby from seeing the major-for-Santa Royale story about the exotic wildlife on the loose in the news. Hence the steady diet of sitcoms and soap operas. If he stops laughing, the game is up.” –Harmless little bunny

“I’m CRUSHED the artist added ‘Root’ to Dick’s bottle, clearly at the last minute. Dick’s a beer-with-lunch guy, not a $2 bottle soda guy! Christ, next you’ll tell me he voted for Mondale!” –A Grave Mind

“This storyline could go two ways and the suspense is not killing me. Toby could fall deeper into the delusion that Sunny is the lone survivor of his South American species and on arrival in another continent has gained super powers, or the trauma of the truck crash will build up an insufferable ennui in his soul leading to a premature death and funeral that all of Charterstone must attend.” –SabeHombre

“How far off is the panel where a plugger is depicted enjoying his bidet? Really sorry for sharing this thought (and, indeed, for having it).” –Kyle

“Perhaps Ian has quit academe and moved into the lucrative world of parrot smuggling, which would explain his month-long absence at a ‘conference.’ Ever since the crash happened on his watch, he’s been on the run from the cartel who expect to be made whole.” –Charterstone: Dune

“People are criticizing Mary for not understanding that Sunny is just imitating what he sees on television. But me? I commend him for showing more human emotion than any human character in this strip.” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“Abner Kadaver is such a good pun name. It’s multifaceted. I’m focusing solely on that to avoid thinking about Blondie and Dagwood’s sex life.” –Austria

“I love how this guy is adopting the language of art criticism to discuss Ozob’s silly car customizations. ‘Ozob’s breakout work, Vampire Car, signaled a shift in approach from the solemn, if covertly ironic, form of automotive menace typified by Stephen King’s Christine, to an overtly cartoonish aesthetic drawing on influences that range from monster truck rallies to The Munsters’ Munster Koach. Critics remain divided as to whether this shift represents camp, or even pandering, versus a clever inversion in which postmodernist technique is recruited into the service of a critique of postmodernism itself.’” –Peanut Gallery

“The eternal recurrence of Crock reruns means that not only did newspapers (note to self: check if there are still newspapers) run this strip today, but also fifteen years ago, without noticing that it was about cannibalism and the joke made no sense. Nobody is watching, cartoonists! Go wild!” –matt w

“I might try this as a motivator in the morning. Just look at myself in the mirror and remind myself of the benefits of being a mammal. ‘One good thing about having a bony endoskeleton is I don’t need to moult as I grow,’ ‘One good thing about having skin is that I don’t need to live in a pool of nutrients,’ ‘One good thing about having external genitalia is that I don’t have to package my sperm into a sharp calcified dart that pierces my skin while I’m simultaneously being pierced by my partner’s own calcified sperm dart,’ etc.” –Schroduck

“I don’t see a can of beer next to Thirsty. I call fake.” –Bob Tice

“Shoe is a purple martin, whose diet consists primarily of bugs. The Perfesser, meanwhile, is an osprey, and although he’s primarily a pescatarian he will hunt his fellow birds if he needs to — for example, to take out the galliforms his boss is threatening to replace him with.” –TheDiva

“When you consider the dating scene in Shoe, those eggs are unfertilized, anyway.” –Hibbleton

“The good news is, birds actually will eat their own eggs to recoup calcium so Shoe is accurate. The bad news is, well, everything I just said.” –Library Seraph

“Since the record sale seems to have held up for five years, it might have been a manifestation of COVID asset mania. No doubt Andy lost a packet on shares in a crypto Pigeoncoin and has been futilely attempting to recoup his investment ever since.” –But What Do I Know?

“Shoe is talking mad shit for someone within boiling hot coffee range.” –ectojazzmage