Archive: metaposts

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Look, guys. I really did plan to do a bunch of Cryptkeeper-style creepy puns for this post, but it’s actually been a long and stressful week for me, and it’s not really my skill set, so I couldn’t think of any good ones. The one in the headline of this post was all I could come up with and I’m aware it’s subpar. I know I let you down and I’m sorry, but there will always be another Halloween so let’s hope it gets scarier next year. Anyway, there were a lot of great comments from all of you this week, and this one is my favorite.

“Dennis sets up a Jamba Juice in his family’s living room. Menace level: negligible, unless this is the first step in gentrifying their home.” –TheDiva

And are the runners up! I really liked these too. Happy Halloween, everybody!

“There’s something odd about the art in this strip — the weird blackened spotlight background, the couch that suddenly changes — which makes me wonder is this is a dream or something. I think it’s probably Jeff’s dream, seeing as (a) Ed is being nice to him and (b) it’s the kind of dull, clunky interaction that could only come from such a boring mind.” –pugfuggly

“You know how the mark of a good Thai restaurant is that it has a lot of customers who are actually Thai? Well, this restaurant has… no other customers at all. Which is either a sign of a bad restaurant, or that boring oldsters Augie and Summer like to eat dinner at 4 p.m.” –BigTed

Rex Morgan characters were never meant to express positive emotion through smiles this much. It’s unnatural. Let’s get back to placid, mildly irritated frowns ASAP.” –ectojazzmage

The ‘& family’ after ‘Marvin’ is very threatening! You think this horrible baby is an abomination, a freak accident? Wrong! He comes from a line of horrible people, their genes are everywhere, humanity is already polluted!” –Ettorre”

“Montoni’s and a shit bookstore are the only two semi-profitable businesses in this God-forsaken town, so it makes sense to have a Pizza Monster. There’s probably a Book Ghost, but that only comes around Christmas to do a Christmas Carol homage, by which I mean rip-off with hack puns that lasts two weeks.’” –Buck Ripsnort

“Women be supporting.” –JeffMcm

“In an ironic twist, Dr Jeff can’t recognize Mary’s cognitive decline due to mercury poisoning due to his own cognitive decline due to mercury poisoning.” –Hibbleton

“Well this is a big deal about nothing. Hootin’ Holler’s population has about a dozen teeth between all its residents. Dentist Hyde can go back to the darkest corridors of Doctor Pritchart’s sick mind.” –KMD

“Does Dennis mean ‘Want some, dad?‘ Or does he mean ‘Want some dad?’ Note that we can’t see most of Henry’s body. Who knows which parts of him went into that suspiciously minced meat-looking smoothie? Halloween week is off to a good start.” –Schroduck

“Look at Kudlick’s dead stare. Wait a minute! This abyss! IT GAZES ALSO!” –A Grave Mind

“Dustin’s dad, dude, the dream is dead. Maybe you had a sparkling personality in your youth, but nobody who can communicate with you as you are now would dream of having sex with you, not even your wife who, being Dustin’s mom, is no catch herself. I’m pretty sure you getting an AI girlfriend will be what brings about SkyNet trying to end humanity. Keep an eye out for a man named John Connor, he will be there to end you before it happens.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“Good thing there’s not a very popular movie adaptation of a musical derived from The Wizard of Oz that released last year and just started its big marketing push for its second part. Otherwise today’s Marvin would look pretty silly.” –Justin Lacy, on BlueSky

“I want more for Marvin’s mom. I really do. Not only does she for some reason have to theme her terrible child’s costume around their dog’s — and that’s bad enough, I am genuinely baffled by this decision — but to get a two-question-mark response to the idea that said theme is from one of the most famous movies ever made? To have to look at a face that’s apparently enraged by the idea? Look, Marvin’s dad, two things: one, I do not and will not remember your name, and two, it’s not like she suggested that the costumes be from, like, Gunga Din, take it down about seven notches and buy some fuckin’ silver facepaint before your wife drops your terrible child on your lap and peaces out for good.” –els

“Sorry, vampires were also invented before Marvin was born. Actually, I think 90% of Halloween costumes reference things created before Marvin was born. Marvin will simply have to go dressed as the 6 7 meme.” –Xine Fury

“It’s hilarious that the Shoe team clearly wanted to do a Macbeth Halloween joke, couldn’t think of one, and pivoted to ‘what’s the other play with the skull?’” –Victor Von

“Love to imagine someone checking in on Mary Worth for the first time in a year or two. ‘Okay, let’s see what wacky and awful hijinks Wilbur has be–‘ [squints, frowns]” –Dan

“God, this is awful. Daddy Keane in a defensive crouch behind a tree, the candy lady looking out suspiciously yet contemptuously, the children oblivious, Barfy just happy to waddle along no matter what may come. It’s so awkward when you end your affair with the neighbor!” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“The buckle on Dolly’s witch hat speaks volumes. She’s not your typical witch, she’s a Pilgrim witch. Very clever, very original, she’s been excommunicated from the village and will die of exposure in the Northeastern winter, very tragic.” –Austria

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Many comments were posted on joshreads dot com, the Comics Curmudgeon, this week. Of the ones I saw, this was my favorite:

“These are hate handles, so I’d better draw them in a way I’m sure the audience will hate.” –pachoo

A number of others also merited recognition, in my opinion, due to their humorousness.

You’re a remarkable girl, Olive. Unlike all the dullards I’m surrounded by here. Hey, you! [in the third panel] Go stand in the corner.” –Hibbleton

“Oh, Mary, you’ve really outdone yourself here — lecturing at someone with your thoughts, when you know she’s the only person who can hear them! Olive, meanwhile, is turning up her noise-canceling headphones on the plane, but nothing can cancel the cacophony of a long-winded lady’s psychic signals. If nothing else helps, she’ll have to try to drown them out with some of that Zeppelin and Creedence and Stones music, which all the Boomers at Charterstone kept trying to convince her is better than Taylor.” –BigTed

“Yes, you CAN buy a shepherd’s crook online. These are wonderful times we live in.” –MKay

“As someone who has skydived (for realsies, twice, and I appreciate the opportunity to bring this up) the utter lack of concern Sarge has for Beetle’s safety was shocking to the core until I remembered that he has broken every bone and damaged every organ in the private’s body on multiple occasions and the dude keeps bouncing back, more or less, so Snorkle has no reason to believe that the main parachute failing in any way would be a death sentence for the private. The years of concussions would also help explain how Bailey is able to sleep standing up.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“In panel one, Thel suddenly notices that her son has no forehead. In panel two, she massages one into existence. Ain’t claymation wonderful?” –Peanut Gallery

Mother Goose and Grimm is totally fine today. Everyone knows that gravity pulls stuff towards the ground and Hell, being below the ground, has opposite gravity.” –Earl

“I respect the use of an ancient trope, and I feel that I am somehow deprived in that I have never actually been told to ‘Shhhh’ by a librarian. That tears it! To the library! The liquor store is on the way!” –A Grave Mind

“Chip is not in the library, since he’s busy sniffing glue or smoking pot. Your parents can’t see your eyes are red if they cannot see your eyes!” –Ettorre

“If the nerds can handle Eric, a presumably drunken man wearing a purple pinstripe suit and a gravity-defying hat, I’m sure they can handle a little window-tapping.” –Guts Dozier

“The worst thing is, I’m pretty sure this counts as foreplay for the Kudlicks.” –Schroduck

“Mary thumbs through the Guinness Book to see if there’s a record for slowest speedboat Jeff can break.” –Hex Killhouse, on BlueSky

“You know, like calling on animals to rescue her and her friends from a hot air ballooning accident. Just normal, everyday stuff!” –pugfuggly

Sounds like someone we can all learn from. [steers boat directly into supertanker, resulting in a fiery explosion]” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“I would like Mother Goose and Grimm to consider trying out a facial expression that says ‘I am delivering a wacky zinger’ instead of ‘I am experiencing existential dread.’ Just once. See how it feels.” –Dan

“I love how the two of them just stare straight ahead during this scintillating conversation. Jeff must be thinking ‘If I look at her, I’m going to start laughing, and no accidental boob graze tonight.’ Mary is thinking ‘Yes Olive, I will tell him how special you are.’” –Maltmash3r

“A few days ago, I said that there might be a strip that could realistically portray alcoholism, but Judge Parker was not that strip. I now confidently predict that JP will also prove unable to depict the problems with trying to make a wild animal into a pet.” –Ken

“I love how quickly Dr. Jeff 180s on the whole psychic powers thing. His initial skepticism was merely a test to see if Mary was serious. Now that she’s reaffirmed her belief, he is eager to share his medical perspective on the strange human abilities he has witnessed and the copious notes he has collected but dares not publish for fear of his reputation.” –BananaSam

“I imagine that Mother Goose and Grimm’s first panel went through multiple iterations of specificity, each time getting sent back to the author by the lawyers because they didn’t have permission to use ‘Sears’, ‘K Mart’, ‘Walmart’, or, somehow, the words ‘department store’ in the strip.” –RoofPig, on Patreon

“Mother Goose looks so affronted when asked what credit card she would like to use. ‘As a mythical creature of nursery rhymedom I should not be forced to participate in the modern economy! Isn’t it enough that I consented to contact you through this 1970s landline?’” –matt w

“Plugger chairs don’t need doilies, they need Febreeze.” –nescio

“‘Shopping’ isn’t saying what Ma Goose is doing; she’s talking to Bradley Shopping, her regular high-class male escort.” –TheDiva

Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber! You can get each day’s post ad-free via Patreon if that’s your style! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my tip jar! Thanks to all for your support and readership!

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Mmm, it’s a delicious comment of the week!

“Boy, did I score today, Mary! This extra sandwich was going to be Stanley’s until they hauled him away for criminal negligence!” –Bob Tice

And some very tasty runners up!

“It’s kind of fascinating how Shoe is so ripe for the furries to take it and run with it, except every character, even extras, looks like three divorces and two packs a day.” –kumquats, on BlueSky

“The table and chairs are from the Dagwood Bumstead ‘Furniture for People with Short Weird Legs’ collection.” –Baja Gaijin

“I love how all the animals are completely invested in this mystery with wide-eyed stares except for the duck on the right who’s thinking, ‘I don’t have time for this shit. I’ve got to attend to my laundry so it doesn’t get incinerated.’” –Weaselboy

“Luann and Bernice are taken to another realm, to become heroic and save the new planet from — that WAS the plot of John Carter, right? I feel stupid for asking, because absolutely nobody saw John Carter. It’s my own fault for shooting for a John Carter reference, really. Anyway, hopefully Luann and Bernice are dead now.” –A Grave Mind

“Bernice just solved the Lament Configuration from Hellraiser, and she and Luann have been transported to the Cenobite realm, a hell of infinite sadomasochistic pain. Compared to the usual level of agonized fumbling youthful sexuality on display in this strip, this will be a sweet relief for them.” –Schroduck

“I’m used to Jamaal’s bald head, no problem. But I’m not sure I will ever get used to his [peers at it again] moustache and beard configuration.” –Poteet

“I’ve learned, Mary, that you can go for a balloon ride, get stranded in a forest, get rescued by the fire department, and go straight to a diner to eat without stopping at home for a shower and nap … and dogs are great.” –Hibbleton

“‘Unexpected things happen. Things we never imagined.’ ‘I can’t even imagine this hot air balloon deflating and crashing,’ thought no one in a hot air balloon.” –Kirk Out

“Kudos to the Pluggers art team! Man-Dog the Dog-Man looks like he’s discovered a new kind of incredibly satisfying full-body fatigue, and he’ll be dozing off to the familiar strains of confused dialogue between Eva Gabor and Pat Butram in no time. Even his chair is patterned like a pair of button-down pajamas. Stellar work, y’all.” –Victor Von

“It really looks like Olive is eating a standard diner sandwich, like tuna or chicken salad or something, and look. After you learn, conclusively, that animals are intelligent sentient creatures capable of language and advanced problem solving, maybe at least consider going vegetarian. Maybe fish are stupider than dogs, I dunno.” –Dan

“I can’t wait til they go on their first Mundane Couples Cruise.” –MKay

“Evidence that the mop is intended to be coded ‘female’: Long, flowing ‘hair’; drinking wine, something men are usually not depicted doing unless it’s a fancy dinner or a pre-20th century setting. Evidence that the mop is intended to be coded ‘male’: Refers to the broom as ‘buddy,’ indicating that this is one guy straight talking another, no attempt to give the mop boobs.” –TheDiva

“I’m loving how much Mary’s recent dialog sounds like ‘I fervently believe that you are gaining control over strong mental powers that would change the world if we understood them, and I’m going to speak about them with the kinds of platitudes that people give when they want to end the conversation.’” –Nevin, on Patreon

“I like how happy Bitsy looks. He’s not in any intestinal distress, he’s going back out for the love of the game (the game being feces).” –pugfuggly

“LOLing at Archie and Veronica’s reaction in the last panel. ‘Wait, removing someone’s glasses can reduce their ability to SEE?! What strange witchcraft is this?’” –Roscoe

“I’d like to know the thought process behind the extra in the first panel. ‘Wait, we can’t actually be promoting glasses-shaming. Let’s include a cute girl with glasses somewhere in the comic. We need to make clear that people with glasses can be attractive, and it’s just Dilton who’s the uggo.’” –Westing1992

This Wizard of Id becomes really sad when you consider that the people in this land have almost nothing, yet they’re so angry at the king, they’re willing to sacrifice what few possessions they have just to express their displeasure with him. See that brick in panel one? That was someone’s retirement fund. And that pitchfork in panel two? Well, now that farmer has nothing left to leave his children when he dies of cholera.” –Joe Blevins

Three million dollars! I’m rich! Me, Edgar Grant, right! Let me just move my thumb … What? Edgar Allan Poe? Who the hell is that? And what’s a Zimbabwean dollar worth? Jesus, maybe … if I move my other thumb … it’s unsigned? Nooooo!” –Voshkod

Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber! You can get each day’s post ad-free via Patreon if that’s your style! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my tip jar! Thanks to all for your support and readership!