“I like how the dialogue box looks well too big for the text it contains, as if the writer was going to add more context to this scene and then decided no, it doesn’t matter. No-one cares why this is happening.” –pugfuggly

“To be entirely fair to Blondie, sexual dimorphism seems to be pretty consistent with Dagwoods and I would believe that you need a different formulation of shampoo for whatever the hell is going on with their hair.” –Nichi Joe Young, on BlueSky

“Alice’s attempt to run away from her horrible husband and son was thwarted again. Keep on trying, Alice, I believe in you!” –Ettorre

“I’m fixated on the rubber duck in today’s strip. For one thing, it’s not yellow, and since this is a Sunday strip the odds are good that that is the cartoonist’s original vision. I’m sure there are plenty of white rubber ducks out there available for purchase, but in a visually conservative medium like comic strips it’s a shocking innovation. It’s also not floating on the water, instead sitting precariously on the edge of the bathtub while it’s forced to be audience to Dagwood’s off-key warbling. Finally, it just appears in the second panel of the second row—it’s not there in the previous panel, and Dagwood isn’t carrying it at any point. I’m not sure how or if these facts form a coherent whole, and you may think it’s pedantic to harp on such minor details, but considering Dagwood specifically mentions it I feel justified in focusing on it, especially since the alternative is to just pay attention to the quintillionth ‘ha ha, Dagwood sure likes food!’ punchline.” –Vulpes

“Funny that the artist includes a bit of Alice’s legs in the shot to show that she too isn’t riding on someone’s shoulders, thereby removing the one interesting thought one might have about today’s comic.” –Hibbleton

“I love how Rodney has been hit with arrows from all directions at once. It’s as if the opposing army and his own soldiers came together against their common object of hatred, and then some cherubs joined in the fun for good measure.” –Guts Dozier

“The Daddy Daze Daddy thinking his pre-verbal kid is telling him it’s the end of the school year should not make him less worried about having been Rip Van Winkle’d.” –Morgan Wick

“Oh, Tommy. Tommy, Tommy, Tommy. You’re a former junkie and garden-variety moron, but you’re no dummy. The person next to you? That’s a dummy. Or maybe she’s a twit? Keep running, let’s see how this plays out.” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“Not gonna lie, super curious to discover what kind of Lillian/Lucy memorabilia Hat Guy has been holding onto all these years, in the hope that it would appreciate in value. If these two are in their 80s, their young adulthood would have coincided with the 1960s, so maybe it’s racy photos of the sisters cavorting with Ringo Starr or another luminary of the ‘big bands’ of the day. But since this is the Funkyverse, it’s much more likely to be something devastatingly sad, like one of Lucy’s discarded stockings. Either way, let the laughs ensue!” –Doctor Moreau (Not a Doctor)

“Yep, not a lot of room in a coffin. Dying? Oh, probably. This is Crankshaft after all. I just assumed I’m dying and decided to get ahead on things” –Voshkod

“I’ll take ‘People Who Don’t Have Recording Devices on Their TV, or at Least Don’t Know How to Operate Them’ for 200, Ken!” –Bob Tice

“Here’s the thing about comic strip writers: if they encounter a word with two very different meanings or a word that sounds like another word, they never let go of it. They can’t. Come hell or high water, they’ll turn it into a daily. (‘Hey, wait a second, what if I had two characters called Heller and Highwater?’)” –Joe Blevins

“‘Why have the colors and lighting shifted?!’ ‘Because all is despair, Cosmo! You know this. Now, who’s got a dead-eyed stare for me? Come on!’” –A Grave Mind

“Today’s Mary Worth makes a lot more sense if you realize Tommy is taking a piss; why else would someone blurt out ‘Fro-Yo? That’s cool. I’m in!’ unless they were surprised in a moment when they thought they were alone?” –Handsome Harry Backstayge, Idol of a Million Other Women

“I’ve been wondering what this wedding-planning storyline has to do with sports and whatnot but as he’s been gradually offloading all of the hard work and effort on to other people while he stands to reap the benefits and recognition, I can see that he’s simply figured out how to apply his ‘coaching’ style to other aspects of his life.” –Charterstone: Dune

“What does this setting’s economy even look like? The characters are realistically-sized birds and have no apparent cities or such, just random buildings crudely tied to trees. Is the Perfesser worried that he’ll lose his life savings of twigs and acorns?” –ectojazzmage

“The plan is working perfectly. Tomorrow Eugene shows up on Lillian’s doorstep with a truckload of worn-out furniture and three cats. ‘I figured Lucy would have wanted you to have them. Byee!’” –Peanut Gallery

“Pickles sent me down a brief rabbit hole of researching what happens to your taste buds as you age. It turns out that it is in fact common for your sense of smell and taste to diminish with the years, but that skillful use of acids and seasonings can still make food enjoyable! Or, if you’re mad at your husband for never learning how to cook in the last 50 years, you can serve him Fancy Feast.” –Navigator

“Boy, those joke-free throwaway panels cast a pall over this whole thing, huh? There’s poor Lucky Eddie, obviously concerned over his sick mother. And these are viking times, so when they say ‘sick’ it’s gotta be something serious, possibly even fatal. Meanwhile, we’re reminded that Eddie’s coworkers neither like nor respect him. ‘I can’t believe I miss Lucky Eddie!’ ‘Yeah, that guy sucks! Say, where is he?’” –Joe Blevins

“Good ol’ Lucky Eddie. He’s got a suitcase, he’s got a mailbox, he’s got a lawn. So close to being a regular guy, but he still runs around (or in this case, hitchhikes around) with a goddam funnel on his head.” –Handsome Harry Backstayge, Idol of a Million Other Women

“The male loneliness epidemic has his hit even this comic.” –ectojazzmage

“So there’s no actual food, just a couple of middle-aged men drinking beer, one of whom didn’t even bother to bring his wife along. Happy Memorial Day!” –Pozzo

“Gil is at the Graveyard of Dropped Subplots. ‘Thank you for your service, Sophomore-suffering-from-steroid-abuse and Girl-who-was-a-cutter and .. er .. you, Mr. Whatever-trendy-teen-issue-you-were-dealing-with. Your sacrifice of resolved, coherent storylines was not in vain. It helped me look better, more ‘enlightened.’” –2+2=7

“So she just sorta … stuck her torso out the bottom half of the window, huh? Arms at her sides? Standing straight up? No, no, I get that there are eight little mini-Heathcliffs (Heathscliff?) fluttering after our main guy, that don’t cross my eyes none — right now I’m focusing on the window thing. When a Biblically-accurate Heathcliff shows up, that’s when I stop nitpicking. Possibly forever.” –els

“One thing I learned in a recent Wikipedia hole is that when tanks break down, they require giant tow trucks to collect them and haul them into the shop, a process that is pretty entertaining to watch in old news reels. Of course, tanks are also sitting ducks without close air support and are typically used to advance ground troops, so lady in the car might want to worry both about why Beetle’s out on his own and when the A-10 Thunderbolt IIs are showing up.” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“Does anyone else find it odd that Grimm calls Mother Goose ‘mom’ and wonder if he’s doing it because her name is literally ‘Mother Goose’ even though she doesn’t actually have any children. It seems like Grimm is her pet but he’s actually a completely sentient adult who can go to restaurants and movie theaters and has full understanding of the world around him so he’s not really a pet. Grimm just lives with this bird person and allows her to treat him like he’s her pet even though he’s perfectly capable of living independently. I think we can at least be grateful that there’s no sexual element to this relationship.” –Anonymous

“In the Mother Goose and Grimm universe, Bed Bath & Beyond sells straw, flea dip, and environmental enrichment toys.” –Peanut Gallery

“God, just imagine that the last thing you heard before you died was one of Ed Crankshaft’s little quips. Then imagine the the massive gravitational force of the black hole that killed you stretched that moment into near infinity, as if you passed ten thousand years with those words ringing in your ears. Truly a fate worse than death (followed by death).” –pugfuggly

“Jughead set up his drums right next to the chimney. The fireplace is presumably in the living room. He’s risking his own health and safety just to annoy his father while technically following his orders. I aspire to this level of petty.” –Lauralot

“Dennis is the perfect age to have seen Guardians of the Galaxy and Stranger Things, so he has no problem identifying a cassette tape. A lot of issues interacting appropriately with other people and their stuff, though.” –Schroduck

“As long as Gil likes you, you’re cool with me — and the moment he tires of you, you will no longer exist as far as I’m concerned, because I don’t want to end up in the cornfield. All hail Gil!” –CanuckDownSouth

“Pity the poor, aging newspaper comic artist who is cursed to live in the past but can’t quite remember what a cassette looks like.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“You’re not as bad as I thought, Tommy Beedie! That’s an extremely low bar, though! You still fuckin’ suck!” –Vulpes

“What I love about The Phantom is it will happily take a break from a storyline about an alien on a private jet from Guantanamo blowing up a warlord’s brain with magic TikTok to give us a very specific kink scene where a shirtless man in a cage is taunted by a scantily-clad bongo player. I call this fetish ‘bondage at Lilith Fair.’” –Schroduck

“The Tommy Beedie I know wouldn’t apologize for his actions — he must be on drugs or something!” –Bob Tice

“I’m intrigued by the sharp yellow isosceles triangles emanating from the cars in the final panel. What exactly do they signify? ‘Surprise and confusion at the sudden lack of power to the traffic lights,’ you might say, and perhaps you’re right. But I prefer my own theory, based on the similar shapes surrounding the conflagrations in the second panel of the middle row: without electricity supplying the powerful Morphogenic Field Generator that keeps the city population physically stable, the citizens of Neo-Chicago has started spontaneously exploding, caking the inside of their vehicles with gore and viscera. (You may not have known that such a machine was necessary, but Dick’s rogues’ gallery of grotesques is proof that the human shape is tenuous at best in this universe.)” –Vulpes

“The city’s experiment with intersections that have neither traffic lights nor stop signs isn’t looking so stupid now. See, even during a power outage it works exactly as well as normal!” –Peanut Gallery

“Tommy’s takeaway: chicks don’t dig the short hair. Starts wearing a wig. Busted as a suspected drug dealer as he steps out of the Eva Gabor shop on Santa Royale’s main strip.” –Handsome Harry Backstayge, Idol of a Million Other Women

“You know the Bald-Hairy theory of Russian leadership succession? The Mary Worth Hair theory seems to be that a man’s quantity and quality of hair correlates with his success in life, with the yacht-owning Dr. Jeff being the ideal. Too little hair, like Wilbur, and you’re a narcissistic needy schlub. Too much, like Tommy’s old hair, and you’re a drugged-out felon. With the latter‘s current hair length, he may have a tiny taste of success but might still sample weed once in a while. ‘Can you trim it just above the ears? I’m hoping to buy a Lexus.’” –Tonio

“There are five distinct stages of grief in coping with Heathcliff. Here, we see Anger and Acceptance. Trust me, you don’t want to see Bargaining.” –Joe Blevins

“Heathcliff is a criminal, so is his father, so is his sister. I wanted to play the edgelord and say we should reconsider eugenics, but then I remembered that sterilizing cats is not controversial at all.” –Ettorre

“Things finally break Lonnie’s way when he gets thrown out before he can pay his bill.” –Hibbleton

“The dialogue says ‘protective love interest spoiling for a fight’ and ‘cowardly antagonist trying to back out of a confrontation’ but the facial expressions say ‘informing someone their car is parked in a delivery zone and needs to be moved’ and ‘annoyed by latest in a string of minor inconveniences.’” –TheDiva

“A key skill for an extortionist is knowing when to quit. Glumly hanging around the scene of a failed extortion racket is a real rookie error.” –AndyL

“Well, no, Brandy didn’t technically break up with me. She just went on a trip. But she will break up with me once she learns I’ve told you all this!” –Nevin, on Patreon

“I like how Chicken Lady doesn’t seem sad or defeated, she’s concentrating on strategy. ‘If I make base camp on the landing I should be able to reach the bedroom by tomorrow afternoon.’” –pugfuggly

“Anthony screwed up so bad that his hairstyle changed. Also, he’s trying to drown himself.” –Lauralot

“What’s impressive about Chatu’s physique isn’t that he’s had the self-discipline to maintain it — I mean, what else are are you going to do when you’ve been extrajudicially imprisoned in an open-air, 8-foot by 8-foot cage, wearing the same pair of jeans for 17 years, except body-weight and isometric exercises — rather, what’s impressive is that the Wambesi have apparently been feeding him, what 3500, 3600 calories a day with at least 250 grams of protein?” –Charterstone: Dune

“Foodify doesn’t play entire songs… Ha ha ha, no! That costs money! They just play the lyrics that are even vaguely food related, like ‘Yummy yummy yummy’ from the eponymous hit from The Archies. For songs with no lyrics? Don’t worry, the guy who is running the whole thing from his basement will pop in and announce the title because whoever is writing Blondie thinks Spotify works just like radio.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“The funny thing is that, for once, this comic accidentally came close to real relevancy, since Meta and their privacy-violating glasses have come back into the news again. ‘Uh-oh,’ the Intelligent Life editors said to one another, ‘Today’s strip is dangerously under threat of being actually topical, and the hedge fund that owns our syndicate isn’t going to allow that type of thought-provoking examination for their products. Better end it on a pop culture references so hoary that even the fucking Keane kids beat us to the punch on it to ease the tension.’” –2+2=7