Post Content

Top comment of the week: YOU KNOW IT BABY

“Also, don’t shoot because I’m a talking deer who appears to have human-level intelligence! You could have just asked me to stop eating your flowers, or put up a sign that I would have been able to read, just as I read the label on that bottle! But no! You just went straight for the poison!” –Rosstifer

Runners up: HERE THEY ARE FOR YOU TO ENJOY

“‘And now you’re out ten thousand dollars, and left with a broken heart! You have to report him! For the money, I mean. Any way you look at it, the broken heart is your own fault.’ ‘But you said no judgment!’ ‘Yes. I was criticizing you for having no judgment. Did you think I meant I wasn’t going to judge you? I was clearly pointing at you when I said it.’” –A Concerned Reader

“Old jungle saying or detergent slogan? You be the judge!” –TheDiva

“This is another comic where the throwaway panels make it a totally different story. Up top, we see how Cookie and Alexander were really looking forward to this. They’d put a lot of thought and effort into their Mother’s Day surprise. This was important to them. Only with that context do we realize that, in the last panel, they’re dying inside, with false smiles plastered on their faces.” –Joe Blevins

“Hi, Dad! You still alive? Cayla hasn’t killed you yet? Oh, well.” –Schrödinger’s Droopy

“It should be pretty difficult to time an annual phone call that precisely. Either Les and Summer have been practicing their timing, or else hours have passed between the second and third panel, as Les gestures in increasing discomfort toward the phone that should ring at some point that day.” –JJ48

“Oh, what a time that was! The boys got the eggs out of the fridge — and then — [both gasping with laughter] — and then we had to put them all back!” –Peanut Gallery

“Locating his shins to kick is quite the accomplishment.” –Rusty

“I think maybe Elmo is leaving out the part where his ‘high-tech crush‘ is sexting him and then later retrieving his phone to delete the evidence. Elmo realizes it’s for the best Dagwood doesn’t know what a sext is, or else Blondie would be getting a lot of NSFW photos of sandwiches.” –Marcus Theory

“Curtis’s generation wants NEW stories, like Captain America and Iron Man.” –Chyron HR

“‘Kids today just don’t understand the simple ways to enjoy life,’ says Greg, kicking back on the couch with a relaxing sip from his ice-cold can of green beans.” –jroggs

“Starting a GoFundMe today to double the salary of whoever is still churning out this comic (what would that be, like, ten bucks a week?) if they’ll put Frank Nelson at the end each and every strip saying, ‘I don’t get it.’” –Handsome Harry Backstayge, idol of a million other women

“‘Just extras‘ says the character who’s primary job in the strip is to set up punchlines for a sun-worshipping baby.” –Guillermo el Chiclero

“Look at the way Jeffy is cupping his hand against his mouth there: do you figure he’s stage whispering or all out yelling across the table? I’m figuring the latter, as a result of his pudding mania.” –pugfuggly

“Unless the guy who drew the map likes playing cruel practical jokes, or had a vendetta against you personally, or was simply extremely incompetent … any number of reasons, really! You can’t trust anybody and anyone could betray you at any time! But at least you’re not crazy.” –Navigator

Thanks to everyone who became a Comics Curmudgeon Supporter to get an banner-ad-free site, put some scratch in my tip jar, or backed me on Patreon!. And we need to give a big shout-out to our advertisers:

• Sunday 2am: A weekly webcomic about life, love, happiness, philosophy, and marshmallow chicks.

If you’d like to advertise on the Comics Curmudgeon, and get your very own shoutout in this space, head on over to my BuySellAds page!

Post Content

Hello everyone! A quick technical note: Last night I changed webhosting companies, moving my site to a server hosted by Digital Ocean. This all seemed to go very smoothly from my end, but if you are noticing any technical quirks on the site, please let me know via email (jfruh@jfruh.com). Thanks!

And now it is time, as it is every Friday, for your comment of the week!

“Look at the way those kids are dressed; Merlin didn’t just magic them up out of nothing, he abducted them from the modern era! And, in exchange for fifty families being thrown into endless mourning where they’ll never even get the closure of finding a body, those kids aren’t even going to be Hamlet’s ‘friends’ for long. Remembering how the unfortunate kid with bad BO was treated back when I was in middle school they are quickly going to turn on a boy who only bathes once a week.” –Cass

And your runners up! It is time for them as well!

“I shall sleep, which is a normal human behavior, as I am a normal human, and definitely not an android of some sort! …Initiate Trailbot Hibernation Subroutine” –Thomas Keith, on Facebook

“Pluggers characters have names? This changes everything. And not for the better.” –Lee Sherman

“Doc’s on this trip because it was his idea and his map. JJ’s along for the ride because of his intimate knowledge of the area. Mark’s there to avoid having to sleep with Cherry. But can someone remind me why they let Leola come? I thought she was supposed to be the guide, but so far the only thing she’s led anyone to is an outdoorsman store. I know Mark and Doc are pretty rustic, but I think even they could manage a Google search.” –jroggs

“You know, for a guy who supposedly loves nature, Mark Trail sure prefers jammering away about contour lines on maps to watching the cool animal stuff that’s invariably happening like 10 feet away from him.” –Schroduck

“The strained cleverness! The self-congratulations! The soggy goo they’re supposed to put in their mouths! Mason Jarre would find this all revolting if he weren’t using every molecule of his being to hold it together and not let on that he’s tripping balls.” –Handsome Harry Backstayge, Idol of a Million Other Women

“I like to think today’s Dustin represents the sort of non sequitur the family is used to from their idiot son. Today it was ‘I should get a smaller checkbook,’ but it may as well have been ‘I like dogs’ or ‘Fish don’t have wings, except for flying fish, which I guess are birds.’” –Voshkod

“Oh, it’s the reader! He’s fallen asleep again! Heh … I see Doc’s already taking advantage of his chance to finally take a leak. Speaking of which.” –Old Man Muffaroo

“Pull back for a wide shot, and you’ll see that the house is abandoned. Mommy and the others are on vacation in Carlsbad Caverns right now, and they neglected to bring Jeffy. It’s like Home Alone except that the parents never realize their offspring is missing.” –Joe Blevins

“Radio silence? Estelle has been trying to contact Arther on her short-wave radio? Meanwhile, Arther sits by his cell phone, heartbroken, and says to his one-eyed, two-legged dog, Lucky, ‘Nothing but phone silence.’” –LXIX

“He said he would break up with me if I didn’t send him money, and by golly he did! He’s a man of his word, and I must have him back!” –JJ48

“Hi, Estelle — I spent the last three weeks looking for store-bought tuna casserole before realizing that’s not a thing, so I brought a HOME MADE tuna casserole for your cat and — what the HELL???” –DNH

“I’d like to think that in between panels one and two there was a good 15 minutes of complete silence between those two as the rest of the pizza was cooking, Dagwood staring intensely at the over door the entire time.” –pugfuggly

Thanks to everyone who became a Comics Curmudgeon Supporter to get an banner-ad-free site, put some scratch in my tip jar, or backed me on Patreon!. And we need to give a big shout-out to our advertisers:

• Banana Triangle: Poor Tom and Scotty and Rosemary, lost on an island somewhere in the sea. Frightened and desperate, hungry as could be, devoured each other; problem solved — one, two, three! A webcomic updated thrice weekly.
• Sunday 2am: A weekly webcomic about life, love, happiness, philosophy, and marshmallow chicks.

If you’d like to advertise on the Comics Curmudgeon, and get your very own shoutout in this space, head on over to my BuySellAds page!

Post Content

Hello, joke-enjoying humans! Would you like to see me and many other funny people tell jokes about the Internet one week from today, as is our wont? Well come to the Clubhouse in Los Feliz, Los Angeles, California, and all your needs will be met!

And now: your comment of the week!

“All the clues are there. Dan’l, as in biblical Daniel — whom only God judges — is gone, presumably to his judgement. Much like Snuffy’s midnight trek to the mill, sleepwalking leads poor Amina to her near death at a mill in Bellini’s La sonnambula. And when pressed, Snuffy drops the Ace of Spades, the death-card. Yes, Snuff and his card-playing friends have been dead from the start. Truly M. Night Shyamalan’s The Snuff Sense rewards repeat viewing.” –Voshkod

And the hilarious runners up!

“No, Mary, Love Is a comic strip about two naked people. That’s what I want for me and Arthur. I’m sending him that money right now. Thanks, Mary, you’re the greatest.” –Zerowolf

“If you ignore the text in the balloons (you really should), it looks like like Snuffy was facing the difficult choice between starving and eating his dog, but then suddenly decided that he and his dog could eat his wife.” –Ettore

“Like most men who retire before their wives, Alan is visibly disturbed by the prospect of having an on-site supervisor once again. Mark my words: this will lead to nothing but madness, despair, and the completion of house projects.” –pastordan

“As much as I enjoy the ‘sit in a rocking chair in the corner’ punishment trope, I am entirely fixated on whether, at the Gina Ethnicstereotype-o home each morning, after a bracing breakfast of pasta fagioli, the discussion goes, ‘Gina! Don’t forget your headscarf!’ or ‘Ma! Have you seen my headscarf?!’” –Handsome Harry Backstayge, Idol of a Million Other Women

“So did Doc dress as a mountie for any particular reason, or is this just part of his fun slide into dementia?” –pugfuggly

“Another theory: Dennis isn’t on timeout. His new thing when friends come over is to just sit in a rocking chair and spout cliches with a look of contempt on his face. Like when Joey comes over tomorrow, Dennis will just glare at him and say, ‘Power corrupts … absolute power corrupts absolutely.’ Pretty menacing, I’ll give ya that!” –Jenna

“Let’s not screw it up! I’m going to show you one more time, slowly and deliberately, how to do the Charleston!” –Ned Ryerson

“I think if the blond-haired guy had just said, ‘You’re welcome,’ this unpleasantness could have been avoided. But, no, he decided to make a flowery little speech about meaningful interactions. He brought this on himself.” –Joe Blevins

“So if Arthur is such a successful scammer, why does he live in such cartoonishly exaggerated squalor? Because that’s no ordinary squalor. It’s meticulously curated dilapidation, the latest fashion trend, for which well-heeled hipsters are paying big bucks to squalor-lifestyle designers and personal dilapidation coaches.” –Peanut Gallery

“You want to make Six Chix even more horrific? Think about why Gargamel would want to eat the smurfs. It’s got be because they’re an aphrodisiac, right? I mean, it can’t possibly be because he likes their taste, since he’s never successfully captured a smurf. There’s about to be three horny campers in the comic strip, is what I’m saying.” –Thelonious_Nick

“What’s up with Snuffy’s infant-sized head? Everybody else in Hootin’ Holler appears to have a normal, if sometimes lumpy, head. Snuffy’s is small and round. Is he the human equivalent of a Pug dog?” –Lothar of the Hill People

“Dying is merely the gateway to another level of existence, according to the 1970s mystical novel Jonathan Livingston Seagull, which, if that isn’t the birds’ Bible, I don’t know what is. Frankly, I can imagine the Shoe characters in someone’s pad, drinking Scotch and gathering around a hi-fi playing songs from the movie version’s soundtrack, which were written and sung by Neil Diamond. And if Neil Diamond isn’t the Shoe characters’ troubadour, I don’t know who is.” –BigTed

“Roz, her eyes always half-closed in a dismissive state of perpetual ennui that can only be achieved when life has beaten you down and you work almost non-stop in a dead end job where you see some things, wonders why anyone would want to try and avoid the sweet embrace of death.” –Dread

“That withering look! That gun placed close at hand! Alberto Famoni’s second wife: ‘You’ll drop that i from your name, or I’ll shoot it off! Capisce?’” –The Mighty Untrained FOOZLE

Thanks to everyone who became a Comics Curmudgeon Supporter to get an banner-ad-free site, put some scratch in my tip jar, or backed me on Patreon!. And we need to give a big shout-out to our advertisers:

• Sunday 2am: A weekly webcomic about life, love, happiness, philosophy, and marshmallow chicks.
• Banana Triangle: Poor Tom and Scotty and Rosemary, lost on an island somewhere in the sea. Frightened and desperate, hungry as could be, devoured each other; problem solved — one, two, three! A webcomic updated thrice weekly.

If you’d like to advertise on the Comics Curmudgeon, and get your very own shoutout in this space, head on over to my BuySellAds page!