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Would you like to read this week’s comment that I enjoyed the most? Here it is!

“John knows how to approach Mary Worth — slowly, palms open, arms at 3 and 9.” –Joe Blevins

Also here are your runners up, which you should also enjoy!

“I just want to know what misdeeds Mark Trail committed to cause him to be sentenced to community service, as an instructor for Continuing Education For Crustaceans.” –Irrischano

“Solely from fish? I guess if I ever thought about it, I would have imagined this is the sort of thing we might see if this comic strip ever attempted witty wordplay.” –Mustang

“From what I can tell, it would appear that Robbie has accidentally barged in on JJ watching some sort of Spider-man themed pornography involving a blue disco elf and a burly seaman and is properly horrified yet transfixed. The moment of truth is coming, and by ‘moment of truth,’ I mean JJ.” –Dread

“…they also have salt and pepper shakers covered in the grease of a thousand awful breakfasts and… I don’t know, napkins? That’s something a restaurant has, right?” –rbmalpha

“Mary and Olive’s relationship has officially become a hostage situation. I just can’t tell which way around it is.” –C. Sandy Cyst

“This was a missed opportunity for the ‘Spay/Neuter Your Pet’ people.” –Cosmo Jones, Crime Smasher

“I feel like Roz’s wine list is just a slip of paper with ‘BOONE’S’ in 96-point font.” –Doctor Handsome

“Today, Herb and Jamaal is changing format to become a dystopian science fiction satire about consumerism, where the drone-like populace shuffles back and forth, obsessing over and exchanging blank, meaningless white boxes only referred to as a ‘Product.’ They stand in long queues, sleeping overnight to purchase the new and improved Product. ‘Product 22 is obsolete. I must buy Product 23. The Product is good. The Product is life.'” –Ethan Shuster

“You spend your childhood in New York City and already you get kind of blasé about a lot of things. How many surprises does this world hold for you? Then you realize you’ve never seen two old people win a cake decorating contest.” –Artist formerly known as Ben

“At least the Snow Angel has freakishly wide hips. All the better for … birthing … whatever mutant … baby … sorry, I have to go now.” –The Might Untrained FOOZLE

“Antimatter explosions release energy through ionizing radiation. Ionizing radiation is used to treat cancer. All in all, a fitting end to Westview.” –Zooty

“Oh, sure — standing around with no pants on while a seductive (?) angel gives you a come-hither look sounds good in theory, but in sub-freezing temperatures, his junk has no doubt shrunk like a turtle retreating into its shell.” –Pozzo

“Look at John Dill’s fist squeeze that piping bag as he dreams of his sweet sweet Mary slathered in cake flowers like American Beauty. Olive can see inside his mind and just look at her face.” –lorne

“John is an expert at creeping me out.” –Peanut Gallery

“Biology fact: Pregnant pugs don’t get larger, they just grow extra ripples which eventually distend, detach, and grow into new pugs. This is a biological process known as ‘pugging.'” –Dan

“That guy who apparently has a veritable swiss army knife of different species’ genitals sure is a playa, I tell you what! Ah, this one’s going up on the fridge.” –Jack loves comics

“The lady is talking to her TV remote because no one likes her, her pets are dead, and she’s just as terrible at taxidermy as she is at making friends or taking care of animals. TGIF everyone!” –Alex Blaze

Thanks to everyone who put some scratch in my tip jar! And let’s give thanks to our advertisers:

• Bluebeards Original is proud to join The Comics Curmudgeon as an advertiser! Company owner Paul Kaniewski is a longtime follower of this site, to the point that it inspired him to created the famed Aldo Kelrast MySpace profile. Bluebeards has been making top-rated beard care products for ten years now, so any bearded folks or those that love them, please check out the site and try their stuff.

If you’d like to buy advertising on the site, you can do so on a CPM basis through BuySellAds. To find out more, you can go to my BuySellAds page or just click here.

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Hey guys, a quick question for those of you who (a) have read my novel and (b) enjoy writing reviews of books you read, on the Internet: would you like to write a review of my novel, on the Internet? You can do so over at Goodreads or Amazon! Already a number of kind people have written thoughtful reviews but more can only help. Of course, you’ll need to read before you review and to do that you can buy from the fine links on this here page!

Annnnd with that self-promotion out of the way, let’s enjoy this week’s Comment of the Week, guys!

“Did Dennis walk up a couple steps to make his snide remark? ‘Hang on, I got a good one today, I wanna make eye contact for this.'” –Dan

Let’s also enjoy these hilarious runners up!

“Took me a minute to realize Sarah was wearing a hair-clip. At first I thought it might be a scar from when they put her new head on over the original, normal-sized one.” –Steve S

“The window says ‘ROOK STVUE’. You’d think that combination is meaningless, but just to be sure, you’d step inside to look it up in a thesaurus, right? As one does. And then they have you!” –Shrug

“You could make so much more! Like that guy who invented Sriracha. I bet he’s crazy rich! And look at how many different kinds of Tabasco they have now! Like literally ten or eleven kinds!” –Adam Menendez

“I’m one of the top talents in the apparatus! It’s much better than it was before, in Biff Tannen’s gang!” –Doctor Handsome

“‘Today, you will dress like a Park Avenue doyenne! …At least, an 80-year-old’s idea of what a Park Avenue doyenne looks like … Do they even have Park Avenue anymore?’ [Olive, frightened, shakes her head no.]” –pastordan

“The fact that a: we don’t see below Spicy Condiment’s neck and b: someone with X-ray glasses is looking at her head, makes me appreciate the artists for not drawing what must be a grotesque multi-tentacled disaster below her neckline.” –Kevin on Earth

“Honey, please: don’t bring your problems and negative emotions here, in front of the script! She can sense unhappiness.” –pugfuggly

“I’m pretty sure Pam is referring to how she calls Jeff’s penis ‘Geoffrey’ during the kinky Fresh Prince of Bel Air roleplay.” –Alex Blaze

“The initials IWU on Lois’ sweater indicates an alma mater. Wikipedia offers Indiana and Illinois Wesleyan Universities as possibilities. If there’s anything worse than seeing your college being mentioned in Hi and Lois, it’s not knowing if it’s specifically YOUR college being mentioned in Hi and Lois.” –Irrischano

“Meanwhile, ex-Judge Parker smiles as the plot to his next best-selling book, The Belgrade Affair, is laid out before him like an offering to God. She’d better die, he thinks, tragedy makes a great story.” –Voshkod

“Any other kid would be asking me ‘What is socialization?’ But you didn’t! That’s the next test! Now you get to skip TWO grades!” –hogenmogen

“WHEN HELL IS FULL
THE DEMONS WILL WALK THE EARTH
BUT
THE JOKES WILL NOT GET BETTER” –markpopham, on Twitter

“‘Yes, this remote area should be ideal for an examination of–‘ Here, Trail removed the twist-tied plastic bag from his pocket and and dangled it between thumb and forefinger. ‘–White-nose syndrome.'” –vewatkin

“I, for one, am grateful for that chest-high wall. So deeply grateful.” –Joe Blevins

[The plugger gets home] “Say, this drawing only shows some kind of box with an electrical cord halfway up a dog’s ass! That’s not going to help me connect this thing at all!” –handsome Harry Backstayge, idol of a million other women

“We knew these strips have long lead times, and now we know exactly how long: Today’s Dennis the Menace and The Family Circus were clearly written on 4/20. The creators of Mary Worth, however, have not even heard of The Devil’s Weed.” –Kibo

“I can see two possibilities: 1), the Mary Worth team really wants to add a little real-world New-York flavor to this story, but has no idea what is in NYC and just took a trip to their local mall to sketch logos, or 2) they’re doing this as advertisement for their product-placement services, hoping to entice actual businesses to actually pay them for this in the future. ‘Look how smoothly we inserted Macy’s into the plot. Mary could just as easily take a trip to [South Bend Indiana] and go to [Rocco’s Pizza].'” –DigitalGonzo

“I’m not so sure, Dennis. What about those pictures of missing children where they do a computerized projection of what they’ll look like when they’re older? I’ve prepared one in advance for you, because I have a funny feeling you’re about to go missing.” –Peanut Gallery

Thanks to everyone who put some scratch in my tip jar! And let’s give thanks to our advertisers:

• Bluebeards Original is proud to join The Comics Curmudgeon as an advertiser! Company owner Paul Kaniewski is a longtime follower of this site, to the point that it inspired him to created the famed Aldo Kelrast MySpace profile. Bluebeards has been making top-rated beard care products for ten years now, so any bearded folks or those that love them, please check out the site and try their stuff.

If you’d like to buy advertising on the site, you can do so on a CPM basis through BuySellAds. To find out more, you can go to my BuySellAds page or just click here.

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Ha, you thought I forgot the first comment of the week of 2016, didn’t you? Well, I didn’t! I didn’t at all! Here it is, enjoy it!

“Boog’s parents should just put everything sex-wise into scrapbooking terms. Then perhaps Boog would understand. ‘You see, I opened up your mother’s scrapbook and used my glue stick to insert photos and other paraphernalia,’ Rover explained as he sweated profusely.” –James in North Dakota

And also enjoy these hilarious runners up!

“I think you guys are giving Wilson & Beatty too much credit in Diversity Training. If we’ve gotten TWO ‘As solid an Irishman as you’ve ever met’ comments in a week, I expect nothing less than the Full Leprechaun.” –Ukulele Ike

“That hideous second panel can be recycled if there’s ever a story in which Boog gleefully murders a box-shaped robot, tearing out its artificial internal organs by hand.” –Joe Blevins

“Already I can see that Sarah might not fit into the bland-haired Aryan ideal the school seems to favor in their students. Fortunately for her, as a terrible artist with an explosive temper, they may see leadership potential in her.” –pugfuggly

“Love how disengaged Rex is from the children. ‘Ugh, who are these small, demanding people? The money I pay so I don’t usually have to interact with them is worth every penny!'” –Steve S

“Oregano? More like OregaNO MORE TRAMPLING ON MY RIGHTS OBAMA” –PartyDuder

“Pluggers are only bad at one thing: life.” –Tim Pendergast, on Facebook

“Given the beak-like nose on the female in Gasoline Alley, and the glossy black bird-line eyes shared by all of them, maybe saying a stork was involved in the conception is being outright honest. ‘You see, son, many years ago, your grandpa fell in love with a stork. To keep our stork bloodlines strong, each of us must mate with a stork. Stick with the stork, my son, and you’ll have no egrets.'” –Voshkod

“‘Your sign says you still have your faith. Is that true?’ ‘My sign says what? There’s been some kind of mix-up … I wonder who got the sign that says Put a dollar in my cup for a peek at my crotch?'” –handsome Harry Backstayge, idol of a million other women

“So the moral of the story is, ‘Be careful what you wish for, because you might eat a hamburger and a drumstick with cola poured over them and then vomit on a famous politician.’ A valuable lesson that we can all apply to our own liUURRRRPHHH” –Chyron HR

“I kind of enjoy the way that the homeless man ends every sentence with an exclamation mark. It makes his sad story so much more exciting!” –Loopina

“Holy shit, she has the face of a Precious Moments figurine! It’s deeply unsettling. I wonder what her face will look like when the park rangers find Boog’s corpse half devoured by woodland critters, his attempts to block their sharp teeth with the scrapbook rendered horribly unsuccessful.” –rbmalpha

“Even realizing they’re character ‘names’, the phrase ‘Boog, Hoogy, honey’ sounds more like the ramblings of a senile nursing home patient than actual dialogue. So in other words, all is normal in Gasoline Alley. I’m not even sure why I brought it up. All apologies. As you were.” –The Might Untrained FOOZLE

“Notice that there’s only four taps there. Don’t ask where the ‘Bearded Stout’ is dispensed.” –Doctor Handsome

“Pity that this fire interrupted a charming meal at Beige Burger.” –Irrischano

“I guess we’re supposed to see today’s Rex Morgan and understand that this blond man is angrily storming out of the office, but it really looks to me as though that this guy just jogs around the admissions office all day, yelling angry, out-of-context things to no one in particular.” –Brad

Thanks to everyone who put some scratch in my tip jar! And let’s give thanks to our advertisers:

• Bluebeards Original is proud to join The Comics Curmudgeon as an advertiser! Company owner Paul Kaniewski is a longtime follower of this site, to the point that it inspired him to created the famed Aldo Kelrast MySpace profile. Bluebeards has been making top-rated beard care products for ten years now, so any bearded folks or those that love them, please check out the site and try their stuff.
• Oh yeah, and my novel, don’t forget my novel, that’s definitely a thing you can and should buy!

If you’d like to buy advertising on the site, you can do so on a CPM basis through BuySellAds. To find out more, you can go to my BuySellAds page or just click here.