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Sally Forth, 6/13/05

Jesus, look at Sally and Ted’s eyes! It looks like they spent the better part of the previous evening taking turns hitting each other in the face with a brick. If you want more proof of the Sally Forth-industrial complex’s horror of day jobs, you need look no further than the bleak, puffy morning faces of our two-income couple.

Speaking of day jobs, seeing Ted in a tie makes me wonder: does anyone know what exactly Mr. Forth does for a living? Other than sit around and try to think of comebacks to Sally’s witticisms, I mean.

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Josh’s indecisiveness means extra bonus comics for you!

Ziggy, 5/25/05

Proof that Rex Morgan, M.D. isn’t alone in the category of Comics Whose Authors Should Really Read The Dialogue Aloud Before Choosing Which Words To Boldface or Underline. I’m trying to think of what the pizza emporium representative could have said that would make this intonation make sense. “We have a special on our five-cheese pizza.” “Really? …do you have five-cheese pizzas?” “Uh, yeah, we have a special on it.” Really? …do you have five-cheese pizzas?” “Um…”

I should cut him some slack, I guess. He’s a mouse. It’s an achievement that he’s learned to speak English and operate a phone.

Sally Forth, 5/25/05

Ces, you magnificent bastard, if this storyline ends with Sally poking at a mummified cat corpse with the handle of her tennis racket while Hilary screams in terror and grief, I will be deeply impressed. Tip to Ted: a casual aside at such a vulnerable moment along the lines of “Kitty heard that you were going away to Paris for a week so she killed herself” equals seven days of gettin’ it on in the City of Light without bratty child interference.

Apartment 3-G, 5/25/05

You say you hate to see him go, Lu Ann, but it’s sure giving you a nice opportunity to stare at his ass, isn’t it? I notice in this strip that Lu Ann and Janitor Scott are parting ways in SoPink, the all-pink district in Manhattan that the hipsters seem to have discovered lately. Time Out New York says SoPink is the new DUMBO.

Update: 158 comments, and nobody points out that I got the day of the week wrong in the title of this post? Thank God for the future Mrs. C.

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Sally Forth, 5/21/05

Poor, poor Ted. I have to admit that I’ve enjoyed watching his befuddlement this week as his romantic European getaway has been transformed into a hellish family trek through the abomination that is Euro Disney (“all the culture and fun of Disney World, but full of Dutch and German tourists!”) through a process that he cannot control and only dimly understands. Sally’s cutting, emasculating comment in panel three is just the coup de grâce as his hopes and dreams are gutted. Have fun, Ted!

Since we’re picking on Sally’s hubby, I offer him a bit of travelling advice: Ted, lose the polo shirt before you travel overseas. You might as well just have a sign that says “I am an American, please harass/spit on/pickpocket me.” Take a cue from your wife: her all-black ensemble will help her blend right in.