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Attack of the melonheads

Blondie, 1/29/12

It’s been well established established that Dagwood and Herb use aggressive, angry breakdancing as a way to express extreme negative emotion. But perhaps today’s instance of this odd display gives us insight into just what kind of concert Blondie and Tootsie are trying to drag their husbands to. “Damn it, we don’t want to see any of your pop-punk or indie rock or adult contemporary or modern mainstream country or what have you! For us, there’s old-school hip-hop and only old-school hip-hop!”

Family Circus, 1/29/12

I’m not an expert, but I think that something has gone horribly, horribly wrong with the perspective in this cartoon. Either that or the Keane Kids have suddenly grown to be twice the height of their parents while somehow maintaining their stumpy, gnomish proportions, in which case God help us all.

149 responses to “Attack of the melonheads”

  1. Liam
    January 29th, 2012 at 8:40 am [Reply]

    FC-Now while they are sleeping peacefully let’s kill them.

    MW-So the vicious beating with pieces of the Fourth Wall continue.

    FW-I so very much want to go to college. It will be the only way I escape the horror that is this town.

    MW 2-That tingling sensation you are feeling is from the poison I put in the cookies.

  2. Droopy Says
    January 29th, 2012 at 8:43 am [Reply]

    Prince Valiant: “Calvin! Have you finished weeding the garden?”

    reFOOB: So this is how smElly makes potato vodka.

  3. Baka Gaijin
    January 29th, 2012 at 8:44 am [Reply]

    A better Luann comeback would be, “You’re actually in the waft of my fart cloud.”

    Buckles learned that sandwich-snatching move from Dagwood. Then again, that the only kind of snatch Daggy’s been interested in in half a century.

    Five panels, four kids, three wildly different conclusions from one story in One Big Happy.

  4. Chyron HR
    January 29th, 2012 at 8:48 am [Reply]

    Blondie – NO! NO! NO! It’s not “Yes” without Jon Anderson!!

    FW – That’s nothing, I just picked up a rare copy of The Collected Funky Winkerbean, Volume 194: The Skunk-Man and the Jackass.

  5. Liam
    January 29th, 2012 at 8:51 am [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#3):

    Thanks for that link to One Big Happy. It reminds me of the ending to “Clue”. That is a good moral but how about this? Or this?

  6. Deb
    January 29th, 2012 at 8:54 am [Reply]

    I find it hilarious that even while heaping praises on Mary for saving the kidnapped child, we managed to be assured that her homemade cookies are also to-die-for. She has no faults.

  7. Baka Gaijin
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:07 am [Reply]

    @Liam (#5): They made a movie of “Clue”? Really? Was it the butler in the conservatory with a lead pipe?

    @Deb (#6): Cookies “to-die-for” or “to-die-from?” It makes a difference, Mary.

  8. Baka Gaijin
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:20 am [Reply]

    Mr. Smith, yes there are enough words to thank Mary Worth. Try these: “Thank you, you old hag for being a minor obstacle in the kidnapper’s way. Thank you for traumatizing Emily into a cookie-eating obsessive, too.”

  9. StriderGirl
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:34 am [Reply]

    Happy Curmudgeon’s Day, everyone!

  10. wossname
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:37 am [Reply]

    AS-M – MJ, if you really want to stall Thor, offer him free rainbow swirl ice cream.

    A3G – Now wait a minute. They’re waving handkerchiefs? Out the window? Suddenly this strip seems more out of date than Archie.

    Blondie – I love that Dagwood and Herb both express noncompliance by standing on their heads and spinning like dervishes.

    DT – Beautiful drawing, but, um, who got shot? Is that one of the guys in the band making the universal “I am shot” grimace in the penultimate panel?

    Weekday MT – I have a new theory. The bank robber is the film producer, and this is how he raises money for his projects.

  11. pugfuggly
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:41 am [Reply]

    FC “Ok Jeffy, you pull back the blanket while Dolly and I hoist up the horse head….”

    MT Without Ducks Unlimited, the Pea-headed Magenta Duck would have probably gone extinct years ago!

    MW “What would it say about our species if we only cared about ourselves”? Oh God, it’s not enough to be seen as a decent person, Mary wants to be recognized as a evolutionary superior specimen of Homo sapiens. Well, the joke’s on you, Worth: that awful kidnapper with his low moral fiber and poor impulse control has probably fathered dozens of illegitimate children all over the country, whereas your special ‘altruistic meddling gene’ dies with you. Looks like the assholes will inherit the earth…

  12. pugfuggly
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:46 am [Reply]

    @wossname (#10):

    A3G – Now wait a minute. They’re waving handkerchiefs? Out the window? Suddenly this strip seems more out of date than Archie.

    In my head, Margo and Tommie always had ‘mid-western/neutral’ accents, but I might have to change that to ‘southern belle’

  13. Jocelyn Knockersbury
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:50 am [Reply]

    Why yes, Mary Worth, you ARE the ne plus ultra of humanity. That has been well established and impeccably proven. Now, please, stop wishing me into the fucking cornfield already.

  14. Doctor Handsome
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:51 am [Reply]

    I won’t lie: I’ve had that exact conversation with myself from the throwaway panels many, many times. Except Dagwood doesn’t seem to be blackout drunk here, just unbelievably lazy.

  15. Doctor Handsome
    January 29th, 2012 at 10:01 am [Reply]

    Have we ever seen Bil or Thel yell at the kids? If that’s a daily occurence, what kind of other sordid shit aren’t we privy to?

  16. Gerg
    January 29th, 2012 at 10:07 am [Reply]

    The real tragedy of the Blondie strip happens when you imagine the creators brainstorming the gag. ‘So Dagwood gets so upset he jumps around..’ ‘Need funnier, bigger.’ ‘Ok, bigger…he… SPINS ON HIS HEAD!’ ‘Then Herb does, too?… YES! Perfect! Let’s draw this bitch and get back to the links!’

  17. Ringo Beaumont III
    January 29th, 2012 at 10:21 am [Reply]

    Re: One Big Happy:
    In the first panel, the library lady very clearly refers the the book as “The dog and His SHADOW.” In the second panel, Ruthie reinforces the fact that we’ll be talking about a dog and his SHADOW. Then the story begins and it’s about a dog and his REFLECTION. I know the strip needs to be able to exist without the ‘throwaway’ panels, but should they blatantly contradict the rest of the strip? Honestly, if the people who draw the damned strip can’t pay attention for more than two panels, how the hell do they expect readers to?

  18. Mibbitmaker
    January 29th, 2012 at 10:23 am [Reply]

    FC: The kids are well on their way to becoming Ziggy. God help us all, indeed!

  19. Baka Gaijin
    January 29th, 2012 at 10:25 am [Reply]

    See Dick Tracy for excitement and drama. See Mary Worth the anti-Dick.

    Today’s re-My Cage explains a lot. Such as there’s no Mary Worth in the Cage-iverse. Hmm. If there was a Mary, what animal would she be? I’m thinking one of those sucker fish that attach to sharks or those birds that live on top of hippos.

  20. Bill Peschel
    January 29th, 2012 at 10:30 am [Reply]

    Meanwhile, in Archie, Veronica confesses her lesbian tendencies. It is a fine fine day.

  21. Mark B.
    January 29th, 2012 at 10:31 am [Reply]

    Judge Parker: It appears that April has gone topless in the next-to-last panel, where she asks “…Anything else?” I suspect Sam’s [that is Sam, right?] response would be “And put your top back on. Your rack is impressive, but you should know by now I don’t swing that way.”

  22. Baka Gaijin
    January 29th, 2012 at 10:39 am [Reply]

    @Bill Peschel (#20): I thought the gaydar started pinging but I wasn’t sure it was a false alarm.

  23. gnome de blog
    January 29th, 2012 at 10:53 am [Reply]

    After two whole weeks of unbelievably sickening platitudes, we better be seeing the mother of all Charterstone pool parties. Somebody should melt after being thrown in the water, at least.

  24. Baka Gaijin
    January 29th, 2012 at 10:58 am [Reply]

    @gnome de blog (#23): Oh ho ho! [sotto voce] “We are here at the exclusive Charterstone Pool Party, where we’ve secretly replaced the fine chlorine powder they usually serve with sulfuric acid crystals. Let’s see if anyone can tell the difference!”

  25. gnome de blog
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:12 am [Reply]

    So if April loads up the shotgun on January 29 does that mean it must be fired by June?

  26. browns fan
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:16 am [Reply]

    After seeing Dag and Herb in that disturbing mode, I would be calling Our Lady of Victory to price a 2 for 1 exorcism discount.

  27. Chip
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:21 am [Reply]

    Can the beatification of Mary Worth PLEASE come to an end?! For the love of GOD!

  28. IHateMowing
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:33 am [Reply]

    FC: I wonder how many times Dad has stubbed his toe on that dresser/credenza while trying to squeeze past it on the way to take a midnight leak?

    My little piggie is squealing all the way home just thinking about it.

  29. John C Fremont
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:36 am [Reply]

    A3G – I started searching for the origin of this whole handkerchief waving thing, but then I realized I really, honestly just didn’t care.

    From Tommie and Margo’s faces in that panel, I’m thinking they’re really just drying out their mucus-soaked hankies after the apartment started filling up with gas fumes. Albert Pinkham Ryder is not pleased.

    No, wait. That’s just Ruby.

    DT – Wow! Just, wow!

    RMMD – Give it to me… I’ll “put it in the safe!”

    I think I used to have that shirt June is wearing under her sweater. It looked great with my bell bottoms back in 8th grade and smelled of Command Tahitian Lime deodorant and angst.

    Fitting, I guess, that June says, “Give it to me…” since I was listening to the J. Geils Band a lot back then.

    @Chip (#27): Don’t you mean “For the love of MARY?”

    No, you probably don’t, do you?

    Since she’s at the top of the page advertising for Discount Dance Supply once again, I’d just like to stop and say – Hi, Meaghan!

  30. Comcis Fan
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:39 am [Reply]

    MW: Hark, it’s St. Mary of the Diner! A cross between Miep Gies, Hillel, Martin Niemöller and Mother Teresa! So great, and yet so humble! All hail the Patron of Goleta!

  31. Notebooked
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:43 am [Reply]

    Daisy seems a bit too confused at Dagwood’s spontaneous breakdance considering she’s joined in with it before.

  32. TheDiva
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:46 am [Reply]

    FC: I think it’s just the old forced-perspective trick–the bed is actually twenty feet long.

    9CL: No, Brooke, that does not make it okay.

    C’shaft: Not a joke. Start over.

    FW: The mom in me wants to berate Harry for wanting to blow his daughter’s college fund on comic books, but this is Maddie we’re talking about. She’s unlikely to succeed in college, where getting caught plagiarizing actually has consequences. So go on, Harry, knock yourself out. Whether you sink it into Tarzan or a semester or two at Kent State, the money’s going to waste.

    Luann: Well, it’s hard to repel oneself, isn’t it?

    Marvin: You say overachiever, I say diabetic…


    Pluggers don’t have an ounce of common courtesy.

    SM: The hammer and the muscles are dead give-aways, but the chain mail is innocuous?

  33. Comcis Fan
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:51 am [Reply]

    Herb and Dagwood were sent from another planet to overtake Earth by reproducing with two of our finer female specimens, Blondie and Tootsie. They have integrated beautifully, playing the part of lovably henpecked suburban working stiffs. In fact, the guise would be perfect if not for their uncontrollable, involuntary spinning-on-the-head reaction to extreme anger and disappointment. This is a completely normal, healthy response on the home planet and one for which its otherwise advanced scientists and sociologists hadn’t accounted when planning the mission. Dagwood’s origins also explain his ability to endure abuse from J.C. Dithers.

  34. commodorejohn
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:54 am [Reply]

    6Chix – It’s not Duck Amuk, but then, what is? Nicely done. [*]

    A3G – Whoa, Ruby talking about coming out for everyone, and Margo going on about “love beyond any she had known?” Slashficcers, start your ENGINES!

    Crankshaft – …God help me, I laughed at this.

    Curtis – You know, a civilized customer would have brought out the coupons before the cashier started ringing up. Congratulations, Diane, now he hates your guts. Plugger.

    DT – And here I thought they were going to have a forehead gleam-off.

    FG – Oh, is that how lemmings work.

    FW – Why bother going to college? She’s just going to end up dragged back to Montoni’s.

    JP – …I’m pretty sure she’s topless here. I mean, look at that. The chiaroscuro lighting is just to obscure that fact for plausible deniability. Cripes, in the penultimate panel even Sam can’t not notice! Sam freaking Driver! (But that’s okay, Sam, just keep reminding yourself that girls aren’t good with guns, ha ha, their cooties totally mess up stuff like barrel cleaning. It’s a man thing, that they can never take away from you and *sigh* Randy…)

    MT – DUCKS! They’re everywhere!


    Phantom – I tell you what, I’m always going to be somewhat disappointed that Baretto’s run on The Phantom was cut so short. But…this is a hell of a way for Terry Beatty to start his run.

    PV – That’s a big freakin’ cave.

    RMMD – “It will be better coming from a woman?” I thought Rex was the one teetering on the border of the closet.

    SM – I like the way Thor’s just standing there, trying (I assume) to get somebody in Asgard to open the path for them. “Come on, dad, pick up the phone! Pick up the phone, Dad!

  35. Stroker Ace
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:54 am [Reply]

    FC – Dolly Got Back.

  36. Bill
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:55 am [Reply]


    “It’s been well established established that Dagwood and Herb…” You refuse to proofread, why?

  37. 555 95472
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:11 pm [Reply]

    Is it just me, or do Blondie’s proportions seem particularly … um … unrealistic in the next to last panel?

  38. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:14 pm [Reply]

    The QG picked up the local deadtree Sunday papet this morning. ye godz, what a dismal selection of zombie strips. ReFOOB top of the fold, and downhill from there until you get to PV, JP and RMMD on the back page. Running Born Loser, for Shulz’ sake!

    HotC: Rainbow Dash fail.

    NS: Wiley approaches Batuikian levels of bleak.

    SBp, Bizarro: I lol’d. please forgive me.

    MT: DU is a good organization. well done for the shout-out.

    RwO: /facepalm.

    6Cx: deadline /fail.

    SFx: chibi Jack Sparrow never looked so good!

    Foxtrot: been there, done that.

  39. kingklash
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:18 pm [Reply]

    The Keane kids are trying out the Food Of The Gods?

  40. gleeb
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:23 pm [Reply]

    Baldo: She still believes in the efficacy of prayer. I guess that’ swhat you get for not sending her to a parochial school, where she can see religious folks up close.

    Cornered: Don’t do it. Water loses volume when it melts. Concentrated, indeed!

    ‘shaft: Never question what Ed is doing. The best that can happen is he’ll tell you.

    Dick: Why did Tracy shoot Chico Marx?

    ‘bean: Since the source of the information is Cheatin’ Comic-Book John, I think it’s safe to assume he is the person selling the collection.What the heck does he care about some kid when there’s profit to be had?

    Mark: Remember, if you’re not Ducks Unlimited, you’re a damn piker!

    Phantom: That one muzzle-flare lit panel in the middle. So freakin’ cool.

    Pluggers: …are assholes.

  41. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:32 pm [Reply]


    Happy Sundog!

    corgsqui. (brainmush)

    on a semi-related note, I saw someone walking was almost certainly a corgi/Shelti mix recently.

  42. Dartpaw86
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:33 pm [Reply]

    Today’s Family Circus is recycled. I remember reading this exact joke when I was seven.

  43. Comcis Fan
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:34 pm [Reply]

    @Bill (#36): Now that’s a curmudgeon.

  44. Poteet
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:39 pm [Reply]

    MT — I agree that DU deserves thanks and credit. Thank you, Mark. Once again, however, I am a little taken aback by Mark’s relentless cheerfulness. I know a number of people involved in wetland work, including me, and the reason we are doing it is because wetlands are in trouble. For someone described, in the quick outline of his comic, as an “avid environmentalist,” Mark is quite the Pollyanna. And many duck species aren’t doing so good either. Okay, rant over.

  45. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:43 pm [Reply]

    Crankshaft – It’s a preamble to his constitutional. (Sadly, budget cuts forced the end of today’s strip just one panel before a possible punch line.)

    Hey! If you change the C to a K, isn’t “Krankshaft” German for sick-making?

    Dick – Gunshots. Music to Dick’s ears. I think we can see why he like Spike Smith’s band so much.

    Fred – “I am not wet.” “It is not raining!”

  46. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

    Judge – In the next to last panel, April seems to have shed her top and is standing just so. That’s exactly the sort of thing Manley men just don’t notice, though to his credit, he’s at least thinking about his shotgun, so he must be aroused on some level. [Mark B. saw it too. I'm not the only one!]

    ValiantIf Val really wants to wrap this one up, he should consider that he’s just locked up ( a ) the guy who’s destroyed more robots than he’s ever seen, ( b ) the wife who spends more time working magic than he does bathing, and ( c ) somebody who could tell him just what to write on the Golem’s forehead to make it lie down and go to sleep. [*]

    Mary – As Mary wheels into another stone tablet chiseled with self-encomiums, we see the blank faces of the Smith family. What are they thinking?
    Mr. Smith: “I’m stuffed so full of sugary cookies, all I hear is buzz buzz buzz!
    Emily Smith: “I’m glad I stuffed my ears full of cookies. Look at those gums flap!”
    Mrs. Smith: “Ten seconds until I toss my cookies. Nine. Eight.”

  47. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:46 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#y157): Thanks for the correction! I hope I can keep Mr. Feinberg’s name in mind for the next time I try to make this mistake.

    @Baka Gaijin (#7): Was it the butler in the conservatory with a lead pipe?
    There were multiple endings, which shows just how much it actually depended upon any sort of clues the viewer might be able to put together. Now go back and read Liam’s comment again.

  48. Cloudbuster
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

  49. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:49 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#19): the strip exists in-universe, as Norm had a suggestion to update it to “Mary Worth, Zombie Hunter.” (“Sailor Blondie” would have rocked as well.)

  50. Zerowolf
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:50 pm [Reply]

    MW: This has become a one note song: Me Me Me Me Me….

  51. Zerowolf
    January 29th, 2012 at 12:53 pm [Reply]

    A3G: When was the last time anyone waved hankerchiefs out window to say goodbye? 1941? They’re going to Nebraska, not Normandy!

  52. Baka Gaijin
    January 29th, 2012 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#47): Oh, like Memento. Gotcha.

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#49): It seems like Norm’s relationship with his dad could use a little meddling. I think they’re beyond frolicking in the park with kites.

  53. Baka Gaijin
    January 29th, 2012 at 1:34 pm [Reply]

    MJ, dear, just offer the Asgardian Hammerman a bowl of ice cream. Rainbow swirl if he’s good. By the time he gets antsy and starts to leave, an old biddy’ll block his way to Asgard long enough for someone to rescue you. Peter will be there but Spidey will be ancillary to the action.

  54. sporknpork
    January 29th, 2012 at 1:36 pm [Reply]

    The kids even pulled up a chair to keep watch over them! We always suspected the parents were in charge of the Keane Kompound, but maybe they just can’t escape the melonheads.

  55. NoahSnark
    January 29th, 2012 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

    Imagine waking up to the gaggle of demon children drooling on your feet and tell me you wouldn’t rush out to have a custom bed made.

  56. Mibbitmaker
    January 29th, 2012 at 1:40 pm [Reply]

  57. Crankenstank
    January 29th, 2012 at 2:12 pm [Reply]

    Panels 1, 2, and 6 fit in perfectly with Dagwood’s new commercial endorsement: Depends.

  58. Calico
    January 29th, 2012 at 2:20 pm [Reply]

    @Doctor Handsome (#14):
    Interesting you mention “Blackout drunk”, as I just finished reading Frank McCourt’s (not the idiot ex-owner of the Dodgers) “‘Tis”, and he mentions getting “Stocious drunk.”
    I had never heard that word before, and had to look it up. I think it could refer to several comix characters from time to time.

  59. ArchieNemesis
    January 29th, 2012 at 2:42 pm [Reply]

    @Calico (#58): What are the odds an Irish guy would have the most obscure synonym for drunk?

    Also, in Spiderman, the Avengers call to action is “Avengers Assemble!”, right? Yet there’s no tracking system, and they can’t even call each other on cell phones. The Keystone Cops are better organised.

    Also, I relinquish the name ArchieNemesis in favor of KreatureFeatures. So it’s up for grabs. I never really had anything against that cross-hatched ginger knucklehead anyway.

  60. Steve the Pocket
    January 29th, 2012 at 2:44 pm [Reply]

    Thank you for reminding me how odd Blondie can be sometimes. Seriously, how long ago did that particular shorthand come about? Because whether it was before or after Dean Young was aware that breakdancing was a thing, I have to seriously question what he was thinking. I know the funny pages have a lot of weird stuff that goes unquestioned for tradition’s sake, but Dagwood’s angry breakdancing has to be close to the top.

  61. True Fable
    January 29th, 2012 at 2:47 pm [Reply]

    Sam Driver’s Pretty People Posse! “And stay away from the windows… if you’re going to stand there naked like that!”

    Of course Sam does not say that. He doesn’t even pay attention to his own hot wife when she’s coming on to him, so what chance does a hot blonde CIA operative have with a guy who only poses like James Bond?

    Dagwood That explains Dagwood’s hairstyle, but not Herb’s.

  62. Calico
    January 29th, 2012 at 2:47 pm [Reply]

    @Comcis Fan (#43):
    That’s been happening happening quite a bit lately – 3G and Hagar, to be be exact. : )

  63. Nehemiah Scudder
    January 29th, 2012 at 2:48 pm [Reply]

    MW: “All that is necessary for the triumph of evil…” attributed to Edmund Burke has to be one of the most famous things he never said. Check the discussion of this at Wikiquote.

    Not that it’s a bad sentiment, and it is well phrased, and somebody must have said it first sometime, but it’s pretty clear it wasn’t Burke.

    BG&SS: 5502 days. Curse the bastidges!

  64. Farley's Revenge
    January 29th, 2012 at 3:05 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#7):

    They made a movie of “Clue”? Really? Was it the butler in the conservatory with a lead pipe?

    It might have been the butler in the linen closet with the upstairs maid.

  65. greghousesgf
    January 29th, 2012 at 3:10 pm [Reply]

    can’t Blondie and her friend go to the damn concert without their idiot husbands?

  66. Francisco Arrowroot
    January 29th, 2012 at 3:15 pm [Reply]

    Of course, the reason that Dagwood and Herb don’t want to go to the concert with each other is that Dagwood is an West Coast break dancer, while Herb is a strictly OG East Sida. You can’t tell from the static panels, but one is spinning clockwise and the other is spinning counterclockwise. Get them both in a heated hip hop dance concert and some shit is gonna go down.

  67. Joe, the Upper-Evergreen Guy
    January 29th, 2012 at 3:16 pm [Reply]

    FW: The Funkyverse……where it’s perfectly acceptable to sacrifice your kids’ future for a fucking comic book.

    MW: Stop it. Just stop it already. Stop. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. STOP. STOP. STOP! STOP! STOP!! STOP!! STOOOOP!!!!!!!!

    Blondie: Can’t the wives go to the concert without thier man-boy husbands?? Just askin’.

  68. Swordsmith
    January 29th, 2012 at 3:26 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#7): They did make a movie of Clue, one of my favorite films of all time, and certainly the best movie ever based on a board game. It had a gimmick, though, they released three separate endings, when you saw it in the theater your ticket was marked A, B, or C, which told you which of the three endings you were going to see, so you could come see it again with one of the other endings. I saw all three… admittedly, at a dollar movie Cinema Drafthouse… the gimmick really worked.

    Years later I got the VHS, in which they played the movie with ending A, then stopped and displayed a card reading


    then another one,


    and played ending B and then ending C. This made it clear how the trick was done; the first 3/4ths the movie is the same in each version, just the final reel differed. Took away a bit of the magic, but even so, it’s an excellent film.

    Up to date on Liam’s comment now?

  69. fluffy
    January 29th, 2012 at 3:40 pm [Reply]

    I couldn’t help but notice that Dagwood and Herb were very similarly drawn. And yet there are enough differences that it wasn’t just a copy-paste and recolor! Clearly the artists have a stock template for head-spinning break-dancing that they trace over, or something.

  70. Trillian
    January 29th, 2012 at 3:50 pm [Reply]

    @Swordsmith (#68): For whatever reason, my family missed the movie “Clue” in theaters, but when we visited family one summer, we got a copy of the VCR game Clue, in which you play short scenes on videotape and look for clues in the scene to help you guess whodunit. The relative who gave it to us said that it might help to rent the Clue movie, as she was under the impression that the snippets on the tape were from the movie. Turns out that the movie and the game are not related at all except for the name, but we loved the movie, and the Clue movie works well even when they show you all three endings in a row, especially since the best ending (IMO) is last. I think that the DVD I have allows for both the movie theater one ending A, B, or C or the VHS-style all-three ending presentations.

    We also liked the game, and it introduces new characters as well (Miss Peach, Sgt. Gray, Monsieur Brunette). I think the game would work better in the DVD era (easier to skip through scenes without fast-forwarding or rewinding) but as far as I know, the concept was never really brought back.

  71. Señor Tortilla
    January 29th, 2012 at 3:58 pm [Reply]

    Archie: I think the point was that Veronica was narcissistic, but I couldn’t help but thinking the lesbian POV either, especially given Archie’s expression.

    BB: Because kids don’t read the comics anymore, and no one batted an eye at the “Big Box O’ Beer” in H&L a month or so ago, we can have Beetle and Sarge drinking beer instead of the “root” variety.

    MW: But…I haven’t seen any saving pet raccoons, Mary.

    @Swordsmith (#68): The DVD release randomizes the endings. But C is the most logical one: it would be pretty difficult for one person to pull off all the murders.

  72. Shrug
    January 29th, 2012 at 4:03 pm [Reply]

    @Trillian (#70):

    “We also liked the game, and it introduces new characters as well (Miss Peach, Sgt. Gray, Monsieur Brunette).”

    I’m ready to make an accusation: Miss Peach in the teacher’s lounge with a blackboard eraser.

  73. Trillian
    January 29th, 2012 at 4:09 pm [Reply]

    @Trillian (#70): Oh, I forgot Madame Rose! If you want to know what the game was like, someone has posted the video from the tape on You Tube. As you can see, no relation to the Clue movie at all.

  74. AndyL
    January 29th, 2012 at 4:27 pm [Reply]

    Five more steps! This walkway is so long I’ll barely have the energy to breakdance at my wife!

  75. Baka Gaijin
    January 29th, 2012 at 4:29 pm [Reply]

    @Swordsmith (#68): Thanks, yes, now it makes sense. That’s very clever. I wonder if they changed the name for overseas markets? The game is “Cluedo” over here.

    @Trillian (#70): I looked at the Wikipedia page. With that cast, it should have been an excellent movie.

    @Shrug (#72): Was the eraser clapped? Miss Peach should be careful.

  76. robio
    January 29th, 2012 at 4:33 pm [Reply]

    MW: Wait a minute. Now the couch is under the picture window. Did Mary make these poor people re-arrange her living room in the middle of their worship service, only to be ordered to “start from the beginning” once they were re-seated?

    Wait. Mary does not have a couch. It is a davenport for heaven’s sake.

  77. Peanut Gallery
    January 29th, 2012 at 4:36 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#34):

    MT – DUCKS! They’re everywhere!

    There oughta be some sort of a limit on those things.

  78. This Guy
    January 29th, 2012 at 4:36 pm [Reply]

    Big Nate: South Park did it.

    Curtis: It’s true that Diane was deliberately inefficient in order to show off to her son, but that’s not as bad as the customer I once had who, after I explained that his financial aid money wouldn’t cover the cost of all his textbooks, stared blankly after I told him the amount he owed and proceeded to complain about how terrible I was while I had to get the manager to post-void the transaction AND the computers decided to freeze. Rarely have I wanted so much to punch a customer in the face.

    OtH: I wonder which Doctor that was. For some reason, I hear Ten, even though I prefer Eleven.

  79. The Real Dan
    January 29th, 2012 at 4:45 pm [Reply]

    Dear Mary Worth,

    Shut the fuck up about doing something when you see something wrong or I’m going to jump into the strip and punch you in the head until your brain comes loose and your teeth are in your lower intestine! And I bet NOBODY will do a damn thing about it if they see it.

  80. Sequitur
    January 29th, 2012 at 4:54 pm [Reply]

    MAAAW!! Dagwood and Herb are breakdancing on their heads for no good reason!!

    MAW: Oh, shut up, Curtis.
    PAW: And turn that rap junk down!

  81. AdamCerious
    January 29th, 2012 at 4:59 pm [Reply]

    Blondie: I can understand Herb’s frustration. Whenever I come home after a day of cosplaying as Chester Chetah, all I want is a little cheese and quiet.

  82. Droopy Says
    January 29th, 2012 at 5:04 pm [Reply]

    @The Real Dan (#79): I’d do something. I’d buy a ticket to watch. How much are front-row seats?

  83. Binder's Butter Beans
    January 29th, 2012 at 5:05 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#41): You and your corgsqui turn my brain to happy, squishy mush almost every day. Thank you! ♥ ♥

  84. Droopy Says
    January 29th, 2012 at 5:09 pm [Reply]

    The Amusing Spiderman: Wait–Thor can’t return to Asgard because he broke Odin’s rule about going to Earth. So he can twirl that magic hammer all day but he ain’t going nowhere. Does this make him even less competent than Peter Putzer, who can at least fall through a broken skylight? And if Odin reaches down and smacks him upside the head, will this give him something to discuss with Spiderman?

  85. Baka Gaijin
    January 29th, 2012 at 5:10 pm [Reply]

    @Droopy Says (#82): Seconded. Hell, you could probably sell out 3-shows-a-night at the Venetian for a few years.

  86. Calico
    January 29th, 2012 at 5:37 pm [Reply]

  87. Sequitur
    January 29th, 2012 at 5:45 pm [Reply]

    MAAAAAAHHH!!! Mary Worth keeps going on and on and on and on and on for no good reason!

    MAW: I said, zip it, Curtis.
    PAW: Did’ja read our last Kwanzaa story?

    Curtis: [grumble] It works for Barry. [grumble grumble]

  88. Sequitur
    January 29th, 2012 at 5:51 pm [Reply]

    @Calico (#86): So… Margo is going by the name “Nancy” now.

  89. seismic-2
    January 29th, 2012 at 6:19 pm [Reply]

    FW: I don’t know what Crazy’s worried about – from what we’ve seen of Mad Hattie’s academic performance in Les’s class, I’d say the odds are at least 90% that she’ll never graduate from high school, much less go to college. The only thing for which she shows the slightest enthusiasm is the never-ending series of candy sales to buy uniforms for the marching band, so just let her drop out and become a Montoni’s delivery person, and go ahead and buy the damn final volume of the Tarzan Sunday strips. You can be buried with it when you die of cancer, which will probably be later this year, because it’s your turn now.

    MW: “There are not enough words“. What, does Karen Moy get a phone call every night from the President of the S.P.O.P.G.O.E.E.U.A.W.T.H.N.B.A.P.W.A.M.S.T.F.H.B.A.E.R.F.F.I.T.W.T.E.G. (the Society for Preventing Old People from Getting Overly Excited by Encountering Unexpected Actions for Which They Had Not Been Adequately Prepared for Weeks in Advance, by Making Sure that They First Have Been Alerted through Endlessly Repeated Forewarning Followed Immediately Thereafter by Weeks of Tension-Easing Gloating) saying, “More words, mule!!!”?

  90. Bill Murray
    January 29th, 2012 at 6:25 pm [Reply]

    What Dagwood and Herb didn’t know was the concert was going to feature the soundtrack from Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo.

    Also, do you think Herb ever calls Dagwood Peaches?

  91. Sequitur
    January 29th, 2012 at 6:27 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#89):
    <Maxwell Smart Voice>That’s the second biggest acronym i’ve ever seen.</Maxwell Smart Voice>

  92. Liam
    January 29th, 2012 at 6:37 pm [Reply]

    @Bill Peschel (#20):

    If that is the case will she make out with Betty in front of Archie.

  93. Austria
    January 29th, 2012 at 6:40 pm [Reply]

    Any other Ace Attorney fans here? In case you haven’t already heard the shrieks across the Internet, Capcom just announced the fifth Ace Attorney game IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING. (It’s been five years.)

    Dance with me, my friends!

    …..And now for actual comic-related things.

    BC: That last panel is the best thing ever.

    H&L: The font changed AGAIN?! (I like your daydreams dangerous too, Trixie. The more dangerous the better.)

    Luann: Aqua di Gio? The one with the commercial with all the wet, toned, shirtless men? …I thought it was cologne?

    NAoQV: I giggled.

  94. Browns fan
    January 29th, 2012 at 6:46 pm [Reply]

    No one break dances spinning on their head; this is demon possession, pure and simple.

  95. Liam
    January 29th, 2012 at 6:56 pm [Reply]

    JP-April, when I talk about going pistol shooting I actually mean having gay sex.

    Sally Forth-Can someone tell me where this takes place because my winter hasn’t been like their’s.

  96. Liam
    January 29th, 2012 at 6:57 pm [Reply]

    @Browns fan (#94):

    Then we must call in Mary Worth to drive the demons out of them.

  97. Fashion Police
    January 29th, 2012 at 6:59 pm [Reply]

    Anyone whose wardrobe doesn’t include a collection of starched wing collars, a waistcoat or two and a walking stick has no business wearing an ascot. However, we suspect Mr. McEldowney wears one around the house on weekends just to remind himself how superior he is. A simple bow tie would suffice, sir, unless one regards pretentiousness as an art form.

  98. Mik Holmes
    January 29th, 2012 at 7:07 pm [Reply]

    This is likely already been said, but I just noticed that each spinning-on-head panel is copypasted from previous strips. Note the 3/4 angle he’s drawn at, the acute angle of the shoes, the spread fingers, five on one side and four on the other.

    Not that this surprises me at all, just something to note.

  99. Bookworm
    January 29th, 2012 at 7:11 pm [Reply]

    Dag, I’ve lived closer to the road. It seriously messes with your sleep cycles.

    The Forths definitely do not live in the South. Our winter has been warmer than usual to the point of unseasonal tornadoes.

  100. Sgt. Stoned
    January 29th, 2012 at 7:11 pm [Reply]

    FC: It’s not the the kids have grown, it’s that the bed is so loooooooong.

    MW: What would it say about our species if all we did was care about ourselves? Tell it to Aldo Kelrast, bitch!

  101. ElkMeadow
    January 29th, 2012 at 7:13 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#34):

    Curtis – You know, a civilized customer would have brought out the coupons before the cashier started ringing up. Congratulations, Diane, now he hates your guts. Plugger.

    Most grocery coupons now have bar codes on them. It’s the ten percent off coupon for the home department or apparel that always caused the inward groaning. I had run up individual dishes for a setting for ten, and some other stuff, bringing the total to about $300, when one of the customer’s friends came over and asked it they’d used the home coupon. Fortunately, I’m fast with the ten key, so I just printed out the register tape and had a supervisor cancel the transaction, and used the tape to ring in the barcode numbers and do the discount on each one (yeah, Kroger still hasn’t come up with a faster way of doing it.) Still, they saved $30 back when people had money to buy matching sets of brand-new dishes for every season of the year.

  102. Alison
    January 29th, 2012 at 7:17 pm [Reply]

    MW: How many times can these people say the same thing? “Mary’s the best. Humans should help each other, like Mary does. Because she’s the best. And she helps others, like humans should. Mary, you’re the best, because you do as a human should do, and help others.” WE GET IT! JEEZ!

    At this rate, I’m pretty sure next week’s storyline will be about President Obama declaring “National Mary Worth Day”.

  103. TheDiva
    January 29th, 2012 at 7:21 pm [Reply]

    @Fashion Police (#97): …unless one regards pretentiousness as an art form.

    Well, this is McEldowney we’re talking about.

  104. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    January 29th, 2012 at 7:24 pm [Reply]

    All right, who got our hopes up for a pool party today? I had my tiki cocktail with a tiny umbrella already to go, and yet here we are, still sitting on that goddamned couch, gnawing on cookies.

    Well, a girl can still dream…..

    Pool, glorious pool party!
    Salmon squares and scampi!
    And to loosen the mood—
    Potato-Ade to make you happy!
    Oblong lumps and green blobs!
    What next is the question?
    Move on down the buffet, folks—
    A pale beige confection!

    Pool, glorious pool party
    I can’t wait to dive in
    Charterstonians at play
    Mary, for once, might be quiet!

    Just picture Wilber in shorts —
    Pale, chewing, and sweating!
    Oh, pool,
    Wonderful pool,
    Marvelous pool,
    Glorious pool party!

  105. Binder's Butter Beans
    January 29th, 2012 at 7:42 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#104):
    Just picture Wilber in shorts —
    Pale, chewing, and sweating!

    Funny you should mention it, as I have news from the future: Wilbur is eating a sandwich. Repeat: Wilbur is eating a sandwich. It’s white bread (naturally), and the filling appears to be a pinkish color. Could be devilled ham; could be salmon spread. Could be some strange Charterstonian food I have never encountered before, as I hail from Virginia and don’t understand the customs of Santa Royale. Mary is telling Toby how important it is to take action when you see something wrong. Some kids (where did they come from?) are playing with a — no, don’t kick that beach ball over here! Aaaugh!!

    **end transmission**

  106. Sequitur
    January 29th, 2012 at 7:49 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#104): Since Mary seems to be delinquent with her pool party, why not join this one.

  107. Dale
    January 29th, 2012 at 7:55 pm [Reply]


    The school lets staff members hand out cough drops?
    If a kid brought his own, he’d be expelled.
    If he tried to share them, he’d be charged with some drug crimes.

  108. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    January 29th, 2012 at 8:11 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#106): I’d take a corgi on a raft over
    -an expounding, verbose Ian
    -a loopy, Mary-lovin’ Toeby
    -a desperate, sammich-chomping Wilber
    -a smug, self-satisfied, attention-sucking, white-haired black hole of meddle

  109. Jamus The Bartender
    January 29th, 2012 at 8:22 pm [Reply]

    @Chyron HR (#4): I’ll say. Did you hear that the band members kicked him out while he was in the hospital? I’ve lost faith in humanity.

    Spider Man: I call horseshit. Tony Stark once combed his sofa for Thor’s hair to make a clone of him. He could find him if he really WANTED to.

  110. seismic-2
    January 29th, 2012 at 8:29 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#104):
    We’ve got Gloat, Gloat, Gloat
    Right here in Mary’s apartment
    With a capital “G”
    That rhymes with “P”
    That stand for POOL (party)!

  111. commodorejohn
    January 29th, 2012 at 8:58 pm [Reply]

    @Jamus The Bartender (#109): Worse yet, did you hear the kid they got to replace him? He sounds like a smoker Geddy Lee imitating Jon Anderson >:/

  112. tallyHO
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:14 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#47):

    Yikes. Consider my mind boggled worse than Dagwood and Blondie’s dog.

    I didn’t expect a reply from yesterday in todays post.

    No problem on the distinction making. Thanks for reminding me that Bulbo was even made. (pssst. I’ve have had my mind blown too many times, Ima thunkin’!)

  113. tallyHO
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:15 pm [Reply]

    My previous post is an example of high quality html coding!


    (this link is what I meant to post.)

  114. Jamus The Bartender
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:23 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#111): Heard nothing but bad things. I know Jon Anderson might not have been easy to get along with, but this isn’t right either. This is worse than when Rod Blagojevich sold Obama’s senate seat. I listened to Yes in the nineties instead of Nirvana. I mean, I heard it, but it was for other people. Bought BOTH Keys to Ascension CDs. And, Magnification. Then, 9-11 happened. Coincidence? NO!!

  115. commodorejohn
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:30 pm [Reply]

    @Jamus The Bartender (#114): Ahhh…Keys To Ascension/Keystudio = the best thing they’ve done since Relayer. Oh yeah.

  116. Artist formerly known as Ben
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:37 pm [Reply]

    Blondie: Dagwood and Herb really had their hearts set on that Whodini show last week.

    FC: When Family Circus not only makes me laugh but also makes me think, “That’s kinda clever,” there’s something funky in the water.

    BB: All the coloring monkeys needed to do to make that look like real beer was just use a little more of that mustard piss ink they used for Sarge’s uniform.

    DtM: Dennis knows. Joey’s parents hate to fuck.

    Phantom: Terry Beatty. Interesting choice. He’s got grande shoes to fill.

    Momma: No argument there, Sonia.

  117. commodorejohn
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:43 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#116): Maybe Beetle Bailey takes place in an alt-1993 where Miller Clear wasn’t just a ridiculous abortive experiment that nobody asked for…

  118. Liam
    January 29th, 2012 at 9:52 pm [Reply]

    MW-Can we hurry up and get to the part where one of Mary’s friends betrays her for thirty pieces of silver. I’m looking at you Drew.

  119. Mr K Martin
    January 29th, 2012 at 10:03 pm [Reply]

    Herb and Dagwood are obviously possessed by Satan. Only Mary Worth would be holy enough to perform the exorcism, but she’s too busy healing the lepers.

  120. Baka Gaijin
    January 29th, 2012 at 10:26 pm [Reply]

    @Jamus The Bartender (#109): The operant words are “if he really want to.” This favor would be for Spiderman, the putzies of all superheroes. He’s a superhero only due to the grade inflation that occurred in the 1970′s.

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#116): There’s something funky in the water. That bottle of water you bought at Big Lots was a closeout from the Westview, Ohio grocery store bankruptcy.

  121. The Rixter of Dibley
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:12 pm [Reply]

    MW: “When you see something, say something.”
    I see a bunch of ‘mudgeons at an unsanctioned Charterstone pool party without a lifeguard. There will be no pool party – imagined or otherwise – until Ms. Mary Worth, her very own self, says so!

    FC: Creepy. I wonder what they say when Bil and Thel aren’t sleeping.

  122. odinthor
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:13 pm [Reply]

    Frazz. — Ha ha! It’s funny because Cauliflower doesn’t realize that intelligent people prepare for the possibility of going to work feeling healthy but starting while there to feel the onset of illness!

  123. Mr K Martin
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:32 pm [Reply]

    GARFIELD: The cherry syrup is really the blood of sacrificial virgins spilled to appease the Great Merchandisable Cat God. Jon is right to shield her from this ugly truth.

  124. Comcis Fan
    January 29th, 2012 at 11:58 pm [Reply]

    @The Rixter of Dibley (#121):

    Let’s all head over to Charterstone Phase II and crash their party!

  125. Pseudo3D
    January 30th, 2012 at 12:20 am [Reply]

    @Calico (#86): Sounds a bit like how Ann Eiffel is supposed to be. Personally, I’ve been PO’d at Evans ever since he cancelled the Ann/Toni fight.

    Really, I was disappointed. It didn’t even give a hint about the “Ann Eiffel, Depraved Bisexual” angle that Luann and Bernice were pushing at, which is just bad writing or could be explained away by the fact that Bernice is exaggerating, the latter of which can’t happen because they are Designated Heroes(TM)

  126. Señor Tortilla
    January 30th, 2012 at 12:21 am [Reply]

    @Pseudo3D (#125): Sorry, that was me, old username popped up again.

  127. Artist formerly known as Ben
    January 30th, 2012 at 12:21 am [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#117): Oh wow. I had forgotten Miller Clear even existed, and I was already drinking age by 1993. Yeah, that would be a weird alt-universe.

  128. Hei of the Zaraki Company
    January 30th, 2012 at 12:47 am [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#41):

    OMG! Corgis! I hadn’t a chance to tell you, but thank you thank you thank you for the Corgi pictures. They are just so squee and awww. If only my landlord allowed three pets…

  129. Baka Gaijin
    January 30th, 2012 at 12:56 am [Reply]

    @Señor Tortilla (#126): I like your old username. It’s less hungry-making.

  130. Faster than a Speeding Bullet
    January 30th, 2012 at 1:09 am [Reply]

    @gnome de blog (#23): Your wish has been answered. See this morning’s strip.

  131. Der Schnärkïnätör
    January 30th, 2012 at 2:16 am [Reply]

    @Faster than a Speeding Bullet (#130):
    Hummmm, Looks like Wilbor is loading up!

  132. Comcis Fan
    January 30th, 2012 at 2:31 am [Reply]

    Pool partay! Unh-unh. Pool partay! Look how happy Wilbur is with his six-pack of apple cider doughnuts, or is that a plateful of Crustable sammiches? And ooh, that Nola Wolvenson, with her dark locks and vaguely wolfish, Jewish-sounding name, must be some troublemaker going after the hubby of Delilah, probably no ingenue herself with a handle like that! And what is this scheme that Toby and Mary are cooking up to wrap Ian in Saran? I do believe an anvil just fell out of a palm tree!

  133. Droopy Says
    January 30th, 2012 at 2:50 am [Reply]

    The Amusing Spiderman: Beg some more, Spidey! Then roll over and play dead! (Srsly, is this supposed to be an advert for the Avengers movie? Because I don’t feel motivated to watch a movie about two weasels who blow off an abduction by one of their partners.)

    Mary Worthless: And everyone wants to salt the earth that Mary walks upon.

    Mock Trail: Is “adorable” the new “assless chaps?” Because there’s something adorable about two mean bandits who take the time to buckle up after robbing their local bank. And how long will it take Sheriff Dad and the reformed Myson John to track their Sherwood green getaway car into the woods? Especially because Deputy Bird marked the car so easily? No wonder they were inspired to dump it!

    Luann: Can we see Gunther get beaten to a pulp? Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease? Especially because while he’s recovering he will be asexually tormented by Rosa?

  134. Droopy Says
    January 30th, 2012 at 2:54 am [Reply]

    Creepy Les: The ironic thing about “City of Westview” is that it’s imported from the Love Canal and has 20% fewer carcinogens than the local water. It surpasses even Seveso Lite in popularity, although Les swears by that brand’s bouquet.

  135. ElkMeadow
    January 30th, 2012 at 3:07 am [Reply]

    Someone already made one connection between the golem at Prince Valiant and the melon heads. Looks like Sunday’s was a second one, what with the three oversized melon heads, growing like the golem.

    Monday’s Luann. Aw, for cryin’ out loud. Oh, please let Gunther get suspended as Rose defends her sexual predator.

    MW Pool party! and a Luann cross-over as Toni plays the role of Gunther, Ian as Rose. Or whatever the Delta ethnic replacement female’s name is.

  136. Lisa
    January 30th, 2012 at 3:18 am [Reply]

    MW: Can someone explain what happened to Toby’s arm in panel one? In addition to a pool party (!!!!) is it also shark week?

  137. ElkMeadow
    January 30th, 2012 at 3:36 am [Reply]

    Luann Looks like Rosa’s enjoying the dude’s attention. Then she probably saw Gunther and decided to relieve her boredom.

  138. Mr. O'Malley
    January 30th, 2012 at 4:02 am [Reply]

    MT: Whew! For a moment I thought the bank was being robbed by out-of-town thieves! At least when you’re robbed by local thieves, you know the money is going to stay in the community.

    MW: Nola Wolvenson has one arm in a sling, and the other hand is setting off her leopard-print top with a plaid oven mitt? She must have some awesome flirting skills. “Would you get me a plate of those brown blobs, honey? I can hardly manage with one broken wrist and my other hand in this oven mitt!”

    What about the guy in the yellow suit and one curiously shortened arm?

    At any rate Wilbur is celebrating Chinese New Year with a heaping helping of cha siu bao!

  139. Dale
    January 30th, 2012 at 4:10 am [Reply]

    @Droopy Says (#133):

    Mark Trail

    The seat belts did seem out of character for criminals; but they really make sense, particularly for the driver.
    Lack of a belt may not justify pulling a car over, but it could attract attention and lead a cop to find a reason.
    Wearing a belt does allow the driver better control.
    At the outset, you don’t want a friendly cop to walk up to your idling getaway vehicle just when your partner runs out of the bank.

  140. John C Fremont
    January 30th, 2012 at 6:55 am [Reply]

    @Lisa (#136): I think that thing at the top of her arm is supposed to be her left hand scratching in itch on her right shoulder, or – no, you’re right. She’s had a bite taken out of her.

    @Mr. O’Malley (#138): That guy in the yellow suit at the pool party appears to be doing The Frug or The Swim or one of those other dances the kids are doing on Shindig every week.

    MW – In the words of Roger Daltry, “Yeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!”

    Wilbur looks like that smoking monkey toy I had when I was a kid.

    Delilah’s married to Gary Dent?! Now I really have seen everything! Pass the soylent beige, please.

  141. Droopy Says
    January 30th, 2012 at 7:24 am [Reply]

    @Dale (#139): You’ve put your finger on what’s wrong with using the seat belts: it makes sense. When was the last time that happened in the Trailiverse?

  142. compass rose
    January 30th, 2012 at 7:41 am [Reply]

    MW – This party is in high gear already – The guy to Toby’s left is stripping for a jump into the pool.

  143. gleeb
    January 30th, 2012 at 7:50 am [Reply]

    Dick: Hmm, did Spike, Jr just pull off a cunning spontaneous killing?

    ‘bean: Hey, the insane guy wants to say something no one ever says and then smirk condescendingly. Who are you, the happiness Police?

    Mary: It’s good to see Wilbur branch out to non-sandwich foods.

    Zig: I don’t mind him worshiping the sun, I just wish he weren’t such a suck-up.

  144. Little A.
    January 30th, 2012 at 7:51 am [Reply]

    MT: That realistic drawn unobtrusively colored car would blend in anywhere. I don’t know what those two guys are worried about.

  145. Ranger
    January 30th, 2012 at 10:37 am [Reply]

    Can Blondie and Tootsie just get it on please? They probably want to go see Tom Jones and throw their panties on the stage.

  146. Mr. Magoo
    January 30th, 2012 at 10:55 am [Reply]

    FC: 1. That bed is 50 feet long. 2. Man, Billy has a fat ass!

  147. Ed
    January 31st, 2012 at 5:52 am [Reply]

    Errm. I know I have been away from Sunday comics for a long time, but, when did Blondie and her friend go in for breast augmentation surgery? They sure looked different from when I was a kid. And it was so radical they cannot even stand up straight. No wonder their husbands are spinning on their heads, they probably just got the bills from the plastic surgeons.

  148. Waz
    January 31st, 2012 at 10:15 pm [Reply]

    Blondie: Dagwood doesn’t breakdance only to show negative emotions. He does it when he’s happy, too.

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