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Impending doom (obviously)

Funky Winkerbean, 2/20/12

Hey, something good appears to be happening to characters in Funky Winkerbean! So why is everybody reacting to this news with facial expressions that range from very slight smiles to deep concern? Presumably because they know that nothing good actually happens to characters in Funky Winkerbean. That’s the science class in panel two, and these nerdlingers are well acquainted with the Funkyverse’s Law of Conservation of Misery: if something good happens, it will either set up something worse happening later (e.g., the girls’ team’s loss in the championship will be much more agonizing than another mediocre season that raises nobody’s expectations) or will result in something terrible happening elsewhere (e.g., the girls return with their championship trophy only to find that terrorists have killed everyone at the school and left the building a flaming ruin).

Marvin, 2/20/12

I don’t think you’ve got that quite right, Roy! If Jeff really wanted you out of the house, he’d teach you how to use Craigslist, since no legit jobs actually advertise in the primitive “newspaper” anymore. Presumably he’s going through the motions of handing you the paper to emphasize that he doesn’t actually like you, but is trying to keep you around because you’re one additional target for Marvin to irritate and/or puke on.

Momma, 2/20/12

So, uh, yeah, what do you suppose is going on here?

  • Momma is a resident of Carmel-by-the-Sea, California, and this strip is taking place in 1986
  • Momma doesn’t follow politics but does vaguely remember that Clint Eastwood ran for office once, and she also considers him a better age-appropriate sex fantasy than Ron Paul
  • Momma is disgusted with all politicians and wishes that Dirty Harry would shoot each of them one by one with his .44 magnum
  • Momma is old and kind of demented and just saying stuff

228 responses to “Impending doom (obviously)”

  1. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:33 am [Reply]

    MT: Well, I can’t wait for that conversation:
    Mark: Hello, fellow! It’s good to see you!
    Film-maker friend: Hello, Mark! I have been very busy in the film-making business, but I rushed over to see the amazing blind hunting dog. Where is he?
    Mark: Well, this is a funny story. You see, my friend Tommy who is Butch’s owner let Butch out to wander in the woods because he knew that Butch would return to Tommy’s jacket, which Tommy left in the woods for Butch to find.
    Film-maker friend: . . . .
    Mark: Now the jacket is gone, and Butch is gone. We are hoping that Butch will turn up soon.
    Film-maker friend: . . . .
    Mark: So, who wants pancakes?!

    MW: I was going to make a snarky comment about what could possibly turn Toeby into such a misanthrope, but then I remembered that her human interaction consists of marriage with Ian and a single friendship with a meddling, smug biddy—and so yeah, I’d have meager faith, too.

  2. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:37 am [Reply]

    @Mr. O’Malley (#y211): Hee. Now I’m imagining the Local Thieves with a cabin full of dogs: “How could a blind dog, a basset, a Lab, a coonhound, a retriever, a bloodhound, 3 schnauzers, and a toy poodle cause trouble?”

  3. Cayuga
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:38 am [Reply]

    At first I’d assumed the Momma comic was a reference to Clint Eastwood’s Super Bowl commercial for Chrysler. Then I realized that that doesn’t make sense and isn’t funny, which means I was probably right.

  4. t. jasper parnell
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:38 am [Reply]

    Mama is clearly a bigger sports fan than political junky; she thinks, if that is the word I want, that it is in fact half time in America.

  5. Old School Allie Cat
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:46 am [Reply]

    Doonesbury – Confidential to GBT – I’m not sure what outcome I want here, but I haven’t been this invested in the funnies since the whole Liz/Anthony debacle of 2007.

    That may not be true, but it feels true.

  6. Chareth Cutestory
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:47 am [Reply]

    Funky Winkerbean: I was too focused on the dialogue and TV screen to notice that the panels shifted between two different classrooms, so for a moment I thought that the ever-unstable fluctuations of the Funkyverse timestream had accidentally deposited Mark Twain onto its shores.

  7. Pozzo
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:55 am [Reply]

    Don’t worry, Roy — a job will no doubt be opening up over in “Funky Winkerbean” after the team and their coach die in a fiery bus crash.

  8. Pozzo
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:56 am [Reply]

    #6 (Chareth Cutestory) – Actually, I was thinking that was Sam Elliott.

  9. Mibbitmaker
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:04 am [Reply]

    FW: The school newscaster is showing bad news judgment and bias — not for their team (which is expected of local news), but for her father specifically. Now, say what one will about her grade school equivilent in my own strip, Michelle, and her gender-based ethics (see today’s PCK, which’ll be up shortly), but her (quasi)journalistic ethics are much better than that.

    Marvin: Worse, those are the nursing home classifieds!

    Momma: No, Mrs. Hobbs, I believe Mr. Eastwood’s already had the last word on that Superbowl ad not being about politics. And by Mr. Eastwood, I mean Bill Hader over a week ago.

  10. Trillian
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:14 am [Reply]

    Crankshaft: Shame on you, Crankshaft! Some poor man had to type all those names you just blahblahblahed over with only one hand!

    Dilbert: Story of my life. Snopes gets you nowhere.

    H&J: Why does he want her to bring him a bee? Good thing she was just walking in from outside with that half-empty soda can someone left on the patio.

    Love is…the courteous nudist practice of carrying around a towel to sit on.

  11. The Ridger
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:18 am [Reply]

    I don’t really follow Marvin, but does Roy need “a second job” or just a job? Is he working at some minimum wage place now?

  12. Doctor Handsome
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:21 am [Reply]

    The members of Momma’s bizarre geriatric LP social club all have to decide on a consensus candidate because why? I feel like I’m probably missing some crucial context here. Or perhaps I should drink more.

  13. The Ridger
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:23 am [Reply]

    MT: I love how all Butch cares about is the jacket. He’s quite happy to hang out with the bank robbers, as long as that jacket is there. Maybe he’ll savage Tommy when they show up?

  14. Chyron HR
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:23 am [Reply]

    Snufffilm Smith – Isn’t Barney Google supposed to be a city slicker? Why is he speaking in the same hillbilly patois as every other character?

    JP – It’s traditional for soap strips to recap any important developments from the Sunday installment on Monday, for readers who’s papers don’t carry the Sunday strip. Thus, a reminder: DAMN, Steve’s secretary is fine!

  15. Mibbitmaker
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:25 am [Reply]

    And now, today’s Pop Culture’s Kids is now up, as promised!

    “So what if I slipped in a missy-andry adlib at th’ end? Danae Pyle gets away with that kinda stuff alla time!”

  16. S. Stout
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:30 am [Reply]

    Luann: Rosa exists only to attempt to evolve Gunther’s character. “Good boy! You did something slightly brave! I’m going to buy you some food! Who’s a good boy? You are! Wait, don’t hide under the table!”

    Marvin: Can’t Bea go get a job? Why must her husband find a second job at 60+? It’s equally her fault they’re so poor they have live with a demon child.

  17. wossname
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:32 am [Reply]

    Archie – Very helpful how they preface Moose’s every line with “Duh” so we can tell he’s supposed to be dumber than the other characters. Otherwise, how would we know?

    BGSS – I’m unironically charmed to see Snuffy and Barney greet each other with such joy.

    MW – Dammit, Mary, that’s not what condone means. People condone (forgive or overlook). The word you’re looking for might be “excuse.” You need to get a new platitude book.

    Phantom – Dang, First Tiger just fired all the other nine Tigers? Wouldn’t whacking them be more appropriate in a bigtime crime syndicate?

    Plug – Now that’s just nasty. You mean all the dropped food just sits there forever, rotting?

    CdS – Apologies for not paying attention over the past few days. I think I saw that other artists/writers are going to fill in for Richard Thompson while he takes care of his health issues. I assume that’s started, because the drawing today doesn’t look quite like RT. Do we know who’s drawing/writing and when?

    HotC – I just started reading this recently because it’s mentioned fairly often here. Is it always as gloomy as this arc? If I wanted to cry, I’d read FW Crankshaft 9CL Reply All.

  18. UncleJeff
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:34 am [Reply]

    @The Ridger (#11): As I recall, Roy and what’s-her-name were in retirement, got foreclosed on and dropped in on their child “just for a short while.”
    Sadly, it’s not an uncommon situation.
    Sadly, it’s not “funny”, either.

  19. Davey
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:36 am [Reply]

    @Chyron HR (#14): I think Barney Google is supposed to be speaking with a less pronounced southern accent than the residents of Hootin’ Holler. Note how he says “Smith” instead of “Smif,” “Just” instead of “Jest,” and “Your” instead of “Yore.”

  20. Doctor Handsome
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:36 am [Reply]

    If “seeing us move” means a Marvin animated series, you’re way off, Roy. You ARE the only ones who want that.

  21. Effluvius Erratus
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:38 am [Reply]

    …the girls return with their championship trophy only to find that terrorists have killed everyone at the school and left the building a flaming ruin…

    In fairness, can such people rightly be called “terrorists”? If anything, they’re fighting terrorism — or at least, bleak, nihilistic existential terror — by destroying Westview High.

    GT: Counseling by the numbers, and since Gil’s doing the math, those numbers all add up to zero.

  22. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:42 am [Reply]

    @wossname (#17): Here’s the guest artist for CdS: http://www.gocomics.com/thenorm

  23. pugfuggly
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:44 am [Reply]

    FW How does one ‘say’ a parenthesis in everyday speech? Is it like a quotation mark, where you just say ‘quote/unquote’ , or is it meant as a quick, low-volume aside? Or in this case is it meant to denote some kind of psychic broadcast that only her father can hear? And am I reading into this too much…?

    Momma One more question: where is this happening? Is it some kind of political focus group run by a 1960s airline stewardess? Group therapy for elderly shut-ins by fast-food employees? Maybe it’s an admittance test to a mental health facility run by some obscure religious order? If that’s the case: congratulations Momma, you ‘passed’.

    MW “Mary and Toby continue to disagree about Nola Wolvenson. Long-term forecasts suggest they will continue to disagree on this topic for the next week with a strong chance of daily repetition. Check in sometime next weekend to see if anything has actually happened…”

    A3G I see Scott Gaines v2.5 can recognize verbal humour, but is still a little uncertain as to how to respond to it….

  24. Effluvius Erratus
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:47 am [Reply]

    @wossname (#17):

    Phantom – Dang, First Tiger just fired all the other nine Tigers? Wouldn’t whacking them be more appropriate in a bigtime crime syndicate?

    Yeah, but with the Apple-Foxconn scandals in the news recently, the Mexican cartel has asked all of their overseas partners to improve working conditions to head off any controversy.

  25. teenchy
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:52 am [Reply]

    To our host, re his FW comment: Is “these nerdlingers” meant to be self-referential? ;-)

  26. LoFoMoFo
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:59 am [Reply]

    MT: The robbers appear to have matching shirts that probably commemorate their robbery adventure with a “200k Big Score/Blind Dog Tour 2012″ graphic on the back.

  27. Joe, the Upper-Evergreen Guy
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:00 am [Reply]

    FW: Josh wrote: “….the girls return with their championship trophy only to find that terrorists have killed everyone at the school and left the building a flaming ruin….”

    We can only hope!!

  28. wossname
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:00 am [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#22): Thanks for the info. So is Jantze going to do it the whole time Thompson is out? I had the impression there would be several artists taking turns filling in.

  29. Labdad
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:02 am [Reply]

    @Chyron HR (#14): @Chyron HR (#14): Steve’s secretary, Sam’s secretary, the suspected shooter, EVERYONE except Margaret has a pair of 38s in this arc! But Margaret shot a perfect score with her single .38′ so don’t be dissin’ her!

  30. Anonymous
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:16 am [Reply]

    @t. jasper parnell (#4): Maybe, but it’s the two-minute warning for Momma.

    I don’t even know what that means, but it’s something you’d hear in a sitcom.

  31. Mibbitmaker
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:16 am [Reply]

    @Davey (#19): That’s why I don’t think it’s supposed to be a Southern accent, really, but a different accent altogether. Although, looking at old strips in the Kitchen Sink Press book I have, there isn’t much of any accent in Barney’s speech balloons back then.

  32. DrBear
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:17 am [Reply]

    Oops…No. 30 was me. Sorry, it’s too darn early in the morning.

  33. Marc
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:26 am [Reply]

    Cranky- What a wonderful bunch that selection committee is. There’s eight of them but they make Captain One-Arm do all of the typing. Either they’re a pretty sadistic bunch or their so cheap that they realize they only have to pay him half of what a two armed person would cost.

    Funky- Gee, nobody saw this coming. Let’s see how they manage to fuck up their championship chances and then have them miraculously handed back to them this time.

    Luann- Yeah, hitting somebody with your backpack when they didn’t know you were there sure is brave.

    BGSS- As nice as it is to see all of Nehemiah’s work pay off, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed that we won’t be able to have the 5555 party now.

    Mark Trail- Old dog, blind dog, old coat. DO YOU KNOW ANY OTHER ADJECTIVES ELROD? Every day it’s the same exact conversation. Try this: That aged, sight impaired dog keeps sniffing around that antiquated coat. See how easy that is?

    Mary Worth- Speaking of the same exact conversation every day.

  34. Dono
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:27 am [Reply]

    @wossname (#17):

    “Heart of the City” is being uncharacteristically sad during this arc as Dean deals with the loss of his beloved cat Spock. Normally it’s much more light-hearted and a pretty nice strip. Hang in there.

  35. Marc
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:28 am [Reply]

    @Marc (#33): And I’m disgusted with myself for using “their” instead of “they’re” in my Cranskshaft blurb. Maybe I’ll actually do some work to punish myself for this transgression.

  36. Swordsmith
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:28 am [Reply]

    A3g : Scott: The teddy bear is for the baby, but you knew that didn’t you?
    Margo: Oh, I know that. AND I knew you’d know I’d know you knew.
    Scott: But I didn’t. I only knew that you’d know that I knew. Did you know THAT?
    Margo: Of course.

    BR Of the comics I regularly read, Brewster is the only one to bother mentioning President’s Day. Forrest Gump style, but still.

    DtM I’m glad to see a person of color in this strip, but I have to wonder what exactly is going on. The guy looks like he’s half Wilson’s age, doesn’t seem to have a briefcase or even a clipboard, so this isn’t a sales call or business related visit. And he lives somewhere where he has no neighbors, which means… way out in the wild somewhere? Even in farm country you have neighbors, they may be a mile away but folks are often closer with them than we town dwellers are with the people on the other half of the duplex. Other choice would be he lives in somewhere with so much urban blight that the houses to either side of him are both abandoned/foreclosed. Is DtM really being -that- topical?

    OBH …turned into Marvin so slowly we didn’t even notice.

  37. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:31 am [Reply]

    Beetle – I’ve seen this before. We’re back to the wonderful world of “reduce, reuse, recycle.” A whole crew of family members (a sinecrew, secure against unemployment) are reusing and recycling this once-great strip which is now reduced to a permanent twilight of semi-humorous senility. Pull the string! Dance to that for which you are created! An army of the not-dead-yet wait to mobilize at the first sign that any newspaper might stop carrying your extruded comical product.

    Close – Lots of ink today. McPherson must have really had to hustle in order to meet his self-imposed limit of spending no more than ten minutes on any given strip from idea to completion.

    Cul – Best of luck to Richard Thompson in getting back into the groove with everything working. I rather doubt snark will be needed for the substitute artistes here, but there’s nothing like the real thing (baby).

  38. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:32 am [Reply]

    Queen – Is this a homage to John Belushi or John Cleese?

    Phantom – It’s a beautiful day here for the traditional Running of the Tigers…

    R=R – recaption: “She who falls asleep with cats wakes up with hairballs.”

  39. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:33 am [Reply]

    Josh – Possibly, the slight expectant smiles in the first panel of Smirky Schadenfreud were a Pavlovian response to the What-a-Burger logo. Once they realized it was just local news, their usual flatline emotional state kicked back in.

    Or else it was just gas.

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#22): Oh, all right. Adding “The Norm” to my Darkgate now.

    @Marc (#33): Not only does the one-armed guy have to type it all [Crankshaft], but the most-used keys are all on the left side. Insult + injury = Batiukan WINZ.

    Maybe Kelly Welly writes Mark Trail. “Old” was her favorite adjective, anyway.

  40. But What Do I Know?
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:37 am [Reply]

    DtM — Is this the first person-of-color sighting in Mr. Wilson’s World?

    MT — For a man who just stole 200 large, Long-Hair-But-No-Sideburns seems remarkably frugal. . .

    JP — Well, if she was running a recon to see how close she could get to Randy, then it really shouldn’t be necessary to go looking for her–just follow Randy!

  41. Mibbitmaker
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:49 am [Reply]

    A3G: The teddy bear is going to be a second mommy to the baby — since his first mommy doesn’t love him, and caused multiple birth defects besides.

    9CL: Really long for us, you mean.

    Crank: “Screw you, Not-Crankshafts!”

    CdS, Best Comic, Guest Artist Edition: Good start.

    Curtis: At least that “troll” didn’t generalize our entire population, unlike the USA-haters.

    Ed Lee: Oh no, now Sarge Snorkle’s getting ready to inhale tailpipe again!

    H&L: “…and the Clinton-Dubya-Obama Era has been particularly rough on ‘em!”

    Lio: As mentioned in the above H&L comment, our last 3 presidents (so far) would be remade that way by their detractors.

    JP: Steve has a missile silo hidden on the premises, and we all know where!

    MT: I really think hippie-haired crook thinks that the dog actually wears that coat like a person would. Yikes!

    MW: “I AM MY OWN FAITH, TOBY! …. oh, you don’t mean my religion. Sorry. Forget I said anything.”

    PBS: Cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon….

    RMMD: “Well, it’s MY money now, an’ you can’t have it! NYAH!”

    S4th: SH! Don’t jinx it, Ted, you friggin’ idiot!!!
    Uh… please, Fates, don’t listen to him! Six seasons and a movie!!!
    *WHEW!*

  42. UncleJeff
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:50 am [Reply]

    Candorville: from a plot standpoint. YEEESHHH! The potential of a real squickfest looms. A little “too soon”, Darrin.
    From a technical standpoint, it’s interesting that Bell got a quick turnaround agreement with his syndicate to do a Whitney Houston less than a week after her death.

  43. Deb T
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:57 am [Reply]

    Momma saw the Chrysler ad with Cint and thought he was running for President.

  44. Señor Tortilla
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:03 am [Reply]

    FW – Ah yes, the “Girls Go the Tournaments” storyline that Batiuk had planned.

    A3G – This whole A3G storyline is somehow both boring and creepy.

    9CL: Brain bleach, please.

    Curtis: You mean this wasn’t for just one week? Dammit!

    MW: See the face? Yes, Toby is the Mary Worth-in-training. That’s how Mary never ages…you have to wear the hair helmet, adopt the identity.

    Ziggy: Ah yes, Ziggy boiled down to its pure essence: a pantsless gnome here to lay problems on. No dialogue, just sweet misery and horror.

  45. bats :[
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:19 am [Reply]

    @Cayuga (#3): Eastwood’s “Man with No Name” made an appearance in the film “Rango.” Maybe that’s where Momma got it.
    Maybe she’s been smoking lizards out in back, though.

  46. exapno
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:20 am [Reply]

    @Chyron HR (#14):

    My mom was born and raised in Kansas, but has lived here in New York State for 60 years. All she has to do is talk to her sister, or any of the other relatives on the phone, and she starts regressing to her native accent. So it is not a stretch at all for our newly returned hero to revert to a Hootin Hollar argot….

    And count me in with the others – am not the biggest BGSS fan, but I have that silly little grin seeing the return of the Native.

    Who knows what next – the appearance of Luann in her own strip??

  47. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:25 am [Reply]

    GF: Conley can be funny when he’s not trying to be Pastis.

    SBp: yeah, that’s how they roll.

    Crank. featuring another one-armed paper hanger. wtf.

    JP: dear godz, is that Gloria?!?

    Ghost-who-luchas: BOSS FIGHT!!!!!

    6Cx: o_O

    SFx: under-clad, underage foxgirls. not sure if want.

  48. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:25 am [Reply]

    Love Is . . . using latex.

  49. Mibbitmaker
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:33 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#38): And now, here’s John Belushi with an editorial reply. John…?

    JOHN: “Thanks, Mibbit. Today’s New Adventures of Queen Victoria comic strip has a Beethoven sequence in it. While it appears to be an original joke, it does have shades of not only our Beethoven running sketch, but Monty Python‘s, as well. I played the great composer on SNL, John Cleese in Monty Python. Now, Eric Idle and Mike Palin hosted the show in my era. Cleese never hosted, only appearing much later.

    “Now, I always though we could’ve had stuff in common besides an old classical music guy, y’know? I… I would’ve loved to try that “Silly Walk” thing. I know, I know… I’m sure Lorne would’ve told me that it’s more of a Chevy thing. He’s the tall one like Cleese. He’s the one who does the physical shtick. Fine, but I’ve done clumsy stuff! I’m no China doll, y’know!…”

    Mibbit: “John…”

    JOHN: “Wait, wait… I can do that crap too, y’know! But, of course, THAT would NEVER do! BULL!!! Sure, I could’ve done the Silly Walks,
    but NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
    NOOOOO!
    Tall pretty-boy CHEVY CHASE would’ve done it! Yeah, SURE… Here I am, DOIN’ THE OL’ PERMANENT DIRT NAP, while CHEVY FRIGGIN’ CHASE gets to be an OBVIOUSLY ELDERLY GUY on a struggling sitcom! Oh, sure, the guy’s banned from hosting Saturday Night! BIG friggin’ WHOOP! I’m stuck up here, with Farley following me around like a PUPPY DOG! I’d friggin’ LOVE to be banned from a TV SHOW! TRY beeing THIS banned!!! YOU!THEY!WHOOPS!AUGH!…”
    (falls behind Update desk)

    That’s the news. And now for something completely different…

  50. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:43 am [Reply]

    ikkle fox, captioned.

    I .gif True Fable a goat hop.

    they pimped commodorejohn’s ride.

    meanwhile, in Judge Parker.

    squeetahs INCOMING!!!

    corgsqui approaching brainmush level.

  51. sporknpork
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:49 am [Reply]

    Say what you will about Funky Winkerbean, but that is the most accurate portrayl of cluttered wires dangling from an outdated CRT television if I’ve ever seen one.

  52. TheDiva
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:55 am [Reply]

    FW: All that smirking Les does has finally dislodged hos beard.

    9CL: Even the characters acknowledge this gag has gone on far too long.

    C’shaft: Great, Cranky has entered the ranks of the Specialest Snowflakes.

    Luann: Even the prospect of seeing Gunther get pummeled isn’t enough for me to tolerate all this set-up.

    MW: Mary doesn’t have faith in anything other than her ability to browbeat people into conforming to her bland Stepfordian ideal, Tobey.

  53. Charlene
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:01 pm [Reply]

    Momma: I don’t know, if I had my choice I’d vote for Clint Eastwood too. Given the alternatives we have up here even at his age Clint would be a vast improvement.

  54. Charlene
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:02 pm [Reply]

    ETA @Charlene (#53): PS. Can you tell that I just want Jack Layton back?

  55. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:03 pm [Reply]

    A Weekend Together Day 2, part 2 is up in the CC Community boards. Dinner, drinks and naughty party games! (plus a surprise revealed!)

    comments appreciated.

    please.

    anyone?

    Bueller ?

  56. Mibbitmaker
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:06 pm [Reply]

  57. Horace Broon
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:17 pm [Reply]

    BG&SS: But … but he was there yesterday. And Snuffy didn’t recognise him. Well, it’s still got more narrative cohesion than Spidey in Asgard.

    And well done, Mr Scudder, for never losing faith that he would return.

    DT: Man, Tracy really has changed under the new regime. Not that long ago, Tracy’s worldview was that “social activist” = “dirty hippy” = “person to be shot”. And now he’s proud that a criminal has reformed, thereby proving the system works. Under Tracy’s old “system” criminals “re-formed” when they hit the pavement after plummeting from the roof.

  58. ironflange
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:27 pm [Reply]

    FW: Obviously, the team bus will go over a cliff. Good news is, it’s a quicker way to go than cancer.

  59. Weaselboy
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:35 pm [Reply]

    Luann, panel two: And by “impressed,” I mean “flabbergasted,” and by “brave,” I mean either “passive-agressive” or ” incredibly chicken-shit” or possibly a combination of both.

  60. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:36 pm [Reply]

    @exapno (#46): The only thing is, Barney wouldn’t revert to an accent he never had before. Perhaps this is just Shulock’s weak attempt at some other accent, like Brooklyn.

    @TheDiva (#52): God help me, it’s gotten to where, when I see “specialest snowflakes” spelled right, it looks wrong!

    @Mibbitmaker (#49): Pretty good. If I had a quibble, it would be that this was funnier than most of the Belushi segments on Weekend Update after the first couple.

  61. Austria
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:38 pm [Reply]

    BGSS: Whoa, two days in a row. I bet the guy that keeps track of Barney Google’s appearances is happy about this.

    FC: A ha ha ha yeah you get school off SCREW YOU

    FW: Hey, is it just me, or does the dialogue actually look handwritten in this one?

    H&L: Legitimate observation or passive-aggressive political commentary?

    Luann: Yep, he’s “brave.” How many of us called this?

    Momma: I’d go with the first one, but that’s a flatscreen. So probably the last one.

    NAoQV: German get!

  62. Lenoxus
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:38 pm [Reply]

    Joshing aside, what is the actual FW joke? That the newscaster is the coach’s daughter? And her apparent bias is therefore disconcerting? Me no get.

  63. TheTJ
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:41 pm [Reply]

    Can anyone really explain why Momma still exists? I mean this seriously, I can see other strips like Family Circus or Pluggers having fans who are so deadened to the lack of humor that they clip the strips more out of habit than anything else, but Momma doesn’t even have poor humor. Besides which, it looks just awful. And the stuff with the son is…. eesh.

    I’m not trying to be snarky here, I just started thinking about the strip (Mistake) and honestly can’t come up for a single good reason for it to be around. Does anyone know? Does the creator have hostages? Is it a brilliant satire that goes over everyone’s heads? A billionaire’s pet project that’s been keeping the newspaper industry afloat? WHAT?!?

  64. gagwriter
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:42 pm [Reply]

    When the Westview girls’ basketball team dies in a horrible bus crash, please let Crankshaft be driving.

  65. A Smirch Unheeded
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

    Fred De gustibus…

    BG&SS If Sheriff Tait is gonna start arresting people in Hootin’ Holler for vagrancy, he’s gonna need a bigger jail.

    BB O tempora… Back when Beetle Bailey started, because of the compulsory draft, most of the male population of the country, and much of the female, had a pretty good idea of how the Army worked, often direct experience. Back then, a gag based on the idea that a sergeant would delay or cancel a training exercise, a hike, because it was raining, for goodness sake, would never be considered. Inconceivable (and I know what that word means!). This is not the Boy Scouts. Even in a cartoon army, even Camp Swampy, you DON’T cancel or delay hikes because it is raining!
    This is jumping the shark, big time.

    GA: So whatshisname had this $50K from some robbery stashed in an enormous church organ that he just happened to have around the house, and while he was in jail, his girlfriend, or wife, or mole, whatever, just happened to sell the enormous three story tall pipe organ to a church for some extra cash, where it was installed and… oh never mind.

  66. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:51 pm [Reply]

    who’s a good dog?

    meanwhile, in Vegas.

    This will ruin your childhood. you have been warned. (probably nsfw as well.)

    Caulfield’s math test.

    Knute’s math test.

    my math test. *cries*

  67. THE REAL Mark Trail
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:51 pm [Reply]

    THANKS to everyone that enjoyed the cephalapods in yesterdays MARK TRAIL. The Sundays this month have been all mine… everything, right down to the color. Now we’re back into a daily that I didn’t have much to do with…
    ‘James Allen

  68. seismic-2
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:52 pm [Reply]

    Momma: Of course, we don’t know what these ladies are voting for. Since they’ve been “watching and listening”, the ladies could simply belong to a movie club, and they’re picking their favorite actor. However, given the eagerness with which Sonya is casting her vote for Clint Eastwood, I suspect this is an aggravated parents’ support group, and the vote is to pick the hit man to whom they would most like to award the contract to whack their daughter-in-law.

  69. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:52 pm [Reply]

    @TheTJ (#63): inertia.

    comics in motion tend to remain in motion unless acted upon by an outside force.

  70. commodorejohn
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

    A3G – It’s Pedobear! Run!

    Crankshaft – So is there some kind of Amputee Anti-Defamation League we can contact so they can complain about all the fucking pinned-up sleeves and get Batiuk’s strips cancelled?

    Curtis – “Dear Gunk: I’m sorry I acted like arranged child marriages are creepy. In fact, some of my best friends are the Love Is… couple.”

    DT – Who are you and what have you done with the real Dick Tracy?

    GT – “Also, why are you tilting your head like that?”

    JP – Meanwhile, Gloria engages her rapid-growth glands in order to keep up with the competition! Go, Gloria! You can do it, if you try!

    Jumble – Uh, yeah, I don’t think you want to be resting one foot on the edge of the boat there, George. That seems less likely to result in crossing the Delaware than entering it.

    Luann – AAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH IF THAT WAS “BRAVE” I’VE SEEN TWO-YEAR-OLDS THAT ARE FREAKING MARINES BY COMPARISON

    MT – This is too stupid for words.

    MW – “You have more faith in people than I do, Mary! Probably because you don’t know you as well as I do!”

    Phantom – Hey, Irrational Tiger, you have underlings for a reason.

    Popeye – Oh, this will surely end well.

    SFx – “Next up, ‘War Pigs!’”

    SM – Heimdall looks appropriately chagrined for someone having to deal with this clownshow. Seriously, for comic-strip sizes, that is a lovely rendering of “quiet, resigned consternation.” Good job, Whoever The Hell Actually Draws The Spider-Man Newspaper Strip!

  71. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:59 pm [Reply]

    I would SO watch this.

  72. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:00 pm [Reply]

    Momma: I’m sure Mr. Eastwood appreciates the 26-years-late endorsement of a made elderly harridan who lives nowhere near Carmel-by-the-Sea.

    6C: Obviously Mr. Blackwell is going to hate this outfit, but thousands of websites will gleefully collect the resulting nip-slips.

    GA: The master criminal team of Barney Frank and Parker Posey (the latter perhaps revisitng her “Superman Returns” role) is so much less compelling than the regular characters. I’m dying to see Rufus malaprop while blowing snot into his kerchief.

    DtM: Mr. Wilson’s Native American friend starts to suspect something deeply unsavory is going on. Maybe it’s Dennis’ come-hither on the railing.

    S4th: Of course Ted’s been concerned about his spiritual counterpart Abed.

    A3G: Deliver the bear while Nina is asleep. If she sees it she’ll rip the head off looking for money.

    DT: What kind of powerful medications is Dick taking that he can say the words “received counseling” and “social activist” without spitting?

    BB: They’re lucky that Sarge’s office is in a building with only one window. And that he’s an idiot, obviously.

    Archie: Moose is contractually obligated to emphasize his stupidity by starting every sentence with “duh.” He really needs a better agent.

    H&J: Stephen Bentley decided at the last minute that it would be sinful and wrong to include the word “beer” in his strip. Either that or Herb really wanted a buzzing insect in a can, for some ungodly reason.

  73. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:04 pm [Reply]

    @wossname (#28): My impression was that they’d do a week at a time; I think he’ll be out for about six weeks—longer than what was originally stated.

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#69): Okay, but one could substitute Reply all as the subject of most of that criticism—so how to explain that abomination?

  74. Ride dem haunches
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:06 pm [Reply]

    @TheTJ (#63): Is it a brilliant satire that goes over everyone’s heads? Sure, that’s it.
    Only, and I hate to be the one breaking this to you, it is, in fact, only going over your head. Momma is the most awesome, fulgent cartoon, with the best writing and art ever, and everyone else sees that. The only reason there are not tons of t-shirts, coffee mugs, fan/fiction, animated tv shows, and feature movies based on Momma, is that the artist, whatshisname, PBOH, is dedicated to the purity of his art, like Bill Watterson with C&H, and would never allow such commercialization.

    Again, sorry to break it to you. No doubt you have many admirable qualities, and are in some ways a decent and worthy human being.

    Your welcome.

  75. bats :[
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:08 pm [Reply]

    Re Momma: then again, maybe the biddies have been watching music videos on demand (is there such a thing? Oh, yeah…You Tube), and Momma’s requesting a Gorillaz tune.

  76. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:11 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#73): can’t explain the inexplicable. DEATH TO REPLY ALL!

    (bring back My Cage and Oh Brother!)

  77. Kyle
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:13 pm [Reply]

    The real story here is Josh didn’t watch the Super Bowl. Time for some soul searching!

  78. Shrug
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

    y200 from TallyHO:

    “What would be fun is if Barney had escaped from an insane asylum, like another early comic strip character. That, indeed, would be a hoot.”

    You’re probably thinking of COUNT SCREWLOOSE FROM TOOLOOSE:

    http://www.toonopedia.com/screwloo.htm

  79. Shrug
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:25 pm [Reply]

    Y193 from A Smirch Unheeded:

    “Me too. I’m itching to do another parody of “On First Looking into Chapman’s Homer”. ”

    Do you know “Myles na Gopaleen’s”* version of that (in his “Keats and Chapman” series)? It seems Keats was considering buying one of his friend’s racing pigeons…

    (* Real name Brian O’Nolan or even realler name Brian Ó Nualláin, but better known as Flann O’Brien.)

    Resisting urge to add a “but everyone knew her as Nancy” reference of some sort…

  80. Will
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

    FW: What is with the “newscaster’s” face in the first panel? She looks like the zombie thing that pops up in those maze pranks.

  81. Wackd
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

    Yes, Roy, continue to assume the worst of people. It is entirely impossible that Jeff handed you the classifieds because he knows you want a place of your own and is trying to help out. Clearly trying to assist you in finding a new job so you can achieve your dream of moving out is in fact an act of hostility, a sign that he only wants you to leave because he is a mean and selfish person.

    But maybe it was an act of hostility. I know if I lived with as big an asshole as Roy, I’d want him gone too.

  82. odinthor
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:32 pm [Reply]

    Bliss. — This comic strip re-invention of Ingmar Bergman’s Winter Light doesn’t, I think, quite catch all the subtleties of its model.

    Frazz. — Well, Cauliflower, I see that the concepts of “implication” and “likelihood,” without which real communication is hobbled, are an unexplored frontier for you.

    GT. — “Then, since we don’t have anything to talk about, I’d like to show off how clean my fingernails are. Like ‘em?”

    H&J. — She brought him a can with a bee in it. Sarah doesn’t understand about implication and likelihood either.

    JP. — “Ha ha! ‘Shooter’! You want a real shooter, let me tell you about Randy. —Oh, wait, you mean like guns ‘n’ stuff. Yeah, you might be on to something.”

    Popeye. — Yes, we all become monsters to protect ourselves. I just didn’t expect to see it mentioned in the funny pages.

  83. Ride dem haunches
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:34 pm [Reply]

    Archie Let’s see: Terminator came out in 1984. Star Wars was 1977. Airplane! was 1980. And GWTW came out in 1939. Quite the old time film buffs, these teens, eh? The newest movie of the bunch came out 28 years ago.

  84. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:40 pm [Reply]

    JP – Oh, so she just wanted to see if she could get close to the Judge, while letting him know who she is and to look out for her in the future and thus, in the process, ruining her chances for taking him by surprise when it counts? This from the “shooter” who failed to kill their victim even after emptying a clip into him at point-blank range? This plot makes no sen- OOOOH! BOOBIES!!

  85. VigilanteMark
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:42 pm [Reply]

    When I first read Momma, I missed the debate “podiums” on the “TV” “image” and actually assumed they were talking about American Idol…which makes the punchline even weirder. Unless Momma has lost the ability to differentiate between shows and thought Eastwood’s Super Bowl ad was his audition or something.

  86. Hibbleton
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:43 pm [Reply]

    Love is…sharing an acid trip.

  87. Shrug
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

    @Horace Broon (#57):

    “And now he’s proud that a criminal has reformed, thereby proving the system works. Under Tracy’s old “system” criminals “re-formed” when they hit the pavement after plummeting from the roof.”

    To be fair (and yeah, I know, “where’s the fun in that?”), both Gravel Gertie and (to a lesser extent) B.O. Plenty started out in the strip as criminals in the mid-1940s, but soon reformed and became friends of Dick and all that. So apparently even back then you *were* allowed to become a reformed criminal as long as you promised to retain a hideous appearance. (Smelling bad also helped.)

  88. Shrug
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:47 pm [Reply]

    @S. Stout (#16):

    “Luann: Rosa exists only to attempt to evolve Gunther’s character. “Good boy! You did something slightly brave! I’m going to buy you some food! Who’s a good boy? You are! Wait, don’t hide under the table!” ”

    If Gunther ever goes blind (and I think we all know what the reason for that would be), Rosa can leave a pair of her panties under the table and thus train him to stay there while she goes off to eat pancakes.

  89. rainbowman56
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:48 pm [Reply]

    About MOMMA strip:Judging from the quality of the candidates on offer, I’d go for the third option.

  90. A Smirch Unheeded
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:49 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug (#79): Brian O’Nolan, eh? Never read his stuff, but if his Wikipedia article is to be believed, that’s definitely my loss.

    I shall look into this gap in my education, instanter! Thanks.

  91. seismic-2
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:50 pm [Reply]

    SM: Let’s see – on earth, Thor thought MJ was Sif for, uh, no real reason whatsoever, then after he had already left earth to take her her to Asgard but while they were already en route, MJ changed to look like Sif, then when they arrived in Asgard but before they can get in she changes back, and now Thor is astonished to see that after this change she doesn’t look like Sif at all but instead looks the way she did when he, uh, thought she was Sif. Is that it? Does someone actually get paid for writing this stuff, or do they just draw it first and then randomly fill in the word balloons, in no particular order? Excelsior!

  92. tallyHO
    February 20th, 2012 at 1:52 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug (#78): Yes, indeed!

    The Count and his dog are hilarious. One of the things about that Milt Gross strip is it routinely shows how everyone outside of the nuthouse should be in one. In theory, it would work well with Hootin Holler. But, whatever. Where ever the strip goes, the chances are good it will be more interesting.

    It is just kind of funny that today’s strip has Barney in the slammer. We’ll see where this goes.

  93. tallyHO
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:01 pm [Reply]

    @gagwriter (#64):

    I’m tellin’ ya, we all know how Crankshaft’s final minutes will end.

    On a related note, I, too, thought today’s Funky Winkerbean* had a guest appearance, or should I say, a ghost appearance from Mark Twain. It would be brilliant if a ghost pops up.every time there is good news in that strip.

    That’s why I’m holding out for the final confrontation between Crankshaft and Les to involve Caspar the Friendly ghost, who will look on the final impact in horror…. up until the point he sees someone whom he can befriend, then Caspar will get all giggly. THE END.

    *i think that is the only time I’ve ever typed that name. it doesn’t feel right…

  94. tallyHO
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:05 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#93):
    I should clarify: we all know that the way Crankshaft perishes will be in a flaming ball of bus. It just seems so inevitable, and sorta, kinda, quasi-poetic.

    (what I initially wrote may come across as sounding rude. if so, sorry)

  95. kkarenb
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:07 pm [Reply]

    CS – The banquet is tonight and he’s learning about it today in the newspaper? In a normal world, wouldn’t the inductees have been invited beforehand?

    And oh, yeah – there’s a freaking pinned-up sleeve, in case anyone has forgotten that this guy has only one arm.

  96. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:14 pm [Reply]

    HOTC: Tatullii’s really making us feel the loss of Spock. I’ll save the Star Trek 3 jokes for another day. My vision’s a little blurred now.

    CdS: So, um, what’s up with the art? It’s good, but it’s obviously not Thompson.

    SSmith: Uh-oh. It turns out Snuffy actually is acquainted with this flatlander. That’s going to complicate the sheriff’s plan to take his watch and kid gloves and bury him in a shallow grave.

  97. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:24 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#91): Somewhere Loki is rubbing his hands together in glee.

    “Bwahaha! My plan is coming to fruition at last. Soon Thor will… Soon I will be able to… Dammit, what was I going for again?”

  98. Señor Tortilla
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:24 pm [Reply]

    JS – Filth.

    DT – I’ve been finding Dick Tracy much less intriguing to read. Sure, the first storyline with the New Team was amazing, but I do miss the stilted dialogues, cardboard cut-outs, and over-the-top deaths.

  99. Poteet
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:26 pm [Reply]

    MT — This alleged movie-making guy was apparently just hanging around his house with his unemployed crew members waiting for a blind-dog story to show up, plus he’s friends with Mark. So we can expect the worst. But in a just universe, he’d turn out to be a formidable guy who cares about dogs and he would listen to Tommy and Mark explain what they did to Butch, and then Friend would punch Tommy and Mark clear into the middle of next week.

  100. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:27 pm [Reply]

    @kkarenb (#95):

    I think the hope was that, if noone told Crank there was a banquet, then he wouldn’t attend. Ole one-arm janxed that scheme.

    Oh, one other thing. Cranky isn’t eligible, despite living in the city currently and having played minor-league ball in the 40s. Pity. From the Nomination form:

    “Athletes must be a graduate of Centerville High School and have lettered in at
    least 1 sport for 2 years or 2 sports for 1 year. Athletes do not qualify for consideration until 10 years after graduation. Coaches, administrators, and other school personnel can qualify if they have served in the Centerville Schools for at least 10 years and are no longer employed by the Centerville school system.”

    It is a hall of fame for contributors to the Centerville HS athletics program, not for performances after they graduated.

  101. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:38 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug (#79):

    Resisting urge to add a “but everyone knew her as Nancy” reference of some sort…

    You thinking Beatles? Or Firesign Theatre?

    @Shrug (#87):

    So apparently even back then you *were* allowed to become a reformed criminal as long as you promised to retain a hideous appearance. (Smelling bad also helped.)

    The Mole fulfills the first requirement at least. He can’t smell too bad, though. Not with that schnozz.

  102. seismic-2
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:40 pm [Reply]

    JP: When the Parker-Driver administrative staff are assigned the job of removing this threat to the Judge’s life, I hope we don’t have the climactic Monique vs. Margaret shoot-out before we’ve had a chance to see the Gloria vs. Monique hoot-out.

  103. Frank Lee Meidere
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:43 pm [Reply]

    It has been one (1) day since Nehemiah Scudder appeared in the Comics Curmudgeon which does not bear his name.

    Is this the beginning of another dark night of the nation’s soul?

  104. Poteet
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:44 pm [Reply]

    MW — “But I believe people can change! In fact, I just proved it! By rolling my scary eyes up to the ceiling, I cast an aging spell on you that has changed you from someone possibly in her forties to someone who is heading steadily toward the century mark! THAT’S what disagreeing with me can result in, Toby, and I hope you’ll spread the word around Charterstone. You’ll soon have to shuffle to do it though. Wait a sec — I’ll wave my index finger and create a walker for you.”

  105. Frank Lee Meidere
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:47 pm [Reply]

    @odinthor (#82): In grade 11 history we were told to write about 1812. Of course, what he meant was the War of 1812, which we’d just studied. Instead, I wrote about how Dvorak had come to write The 1812 Overture.

    Got a 90%.

  106. seismic-2
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:55 pm [Reply]

    @Frank Lee Meidere (#105): I’m surprised it got a passing grade, since Tchaikovsky wrote the 1812 Overture.

  107. The Spectacular Spider-Brick
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:56 pm [Reply]

    Archie: Some reworked dialogue to update the movie references:

    Moose: DUH-H… My favorite movie is “Transformers.”
    Archie: Mine is “The Dark Knight.”
    Jughead: I like “Shaun of the Dead.”
    Betty: My favorite movies are the “Twilight” saga.
    Moose: DUH — You’re even dumber than me!

  108. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 20th, 2012 at 2:58 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#96): re: CdS: Thompson is apparently undergoing some fairly radical treatment for his Parkinsons over the next few weeks, so various cartoonists will be guest-drawing for him.

  109. The Spectacular Spider-Brick
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:01 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#106) wrote:

    @Frank Lee Meidere (#105): I’m surprised it got a passing grade, since Tchaikovsky wrote the 1812 Overture.

    That’s just what those historical-revisionist Tchaikovskyites want you think. Wake up and smell the borscht, sheeple!!!1!

  110. Frank Lee Meidere
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:02 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#106): Ah Christ, you’re right. I had Tchaikovsky in my head, but when I used Google to check the spelling, for some reason I checked on Dvorak’s name instead — I think because that’s the one I most commonly spell-check.

    Any way, I got it right at the time.

    But it was Dvorak who wrote The Nutcracker Suite, right?

  111. 555 95472
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:02 pm [Reply]

    FW: What are these “state tournaments” of which you speak? Hasn’t this site taught you to only get excited if your team is headed to the “playdowns”?

  112. The Spectacular Spider-Brick
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:04 pm [Reply]

    @Frank Lee Meidere (#103) wrote:

    It has been one (1) day since Nehemiah Scudder appeared in the Comics Curmudgeon which does not bear his name.

    Is this the beginning of another dark night of the nation’s soul?

    Oh God, let’s hope so.

  113. The Spectacular Spider-Brick
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:05 pm [Reply]

    On the other hand, how long has it been since Castor Oyl appeared in Popeye?

  114. Frank Lee Meidere
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:12 pm [Reply]

    @The Spectacular Spider-Brick (#113):

    On the other hand, how long has it been since Castor Oyl appeared in Popeye?

    Is that what’s known as a “running gag”?

  115. seismic-2
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:21 pm [Reply]

    @Frank Lee Meidere (#110):

    But it was Dvorak who wrote The Nutcracker Suite, right?

    Actually, I think it was Brooke McEldowney. Oh wait, that was the Ballbreaker Suite.

  116. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:28 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#108): Thank you, bb, u. I thought/feared it might have something to do with his Parkinson’s, and I hope the radical treatment helps him in the long run.

    Like I said, today’s fill-in is good. I’d be interested in what he or she does on his/her own turf.

  117. UncleJeff
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

    HOTC: I hadn’t read that strip for a while but was curious when someone mentioned the “Spock” strips.
    The story’s very good but is Mark Tatulli still doing the drawing? The strips are very moving but it seems like the drawing style is different from when I last saw HOTC.

  118. Liam
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:30 pm [Reply]

    Slylock Fox-The guy responsible for the sound was outside getting a blow job from a groupie.

    Dennis the Menace-Make him a good offer and you will never see Dennis again. The only problem will be explaining why you sold Dennis.

    Love Is-looks like a full moon tonight.

    Plugges-like to feed their children whatever scraps fall to the floor.

    Mary Worth-Mary is just a borderline stalker who doesn’t know it.

    Mary Worth 2-Nola will change even if she dies Mary will make that woman change.

  119. Alter Ego
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:46 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#73): How to explain why Reply All is in newspapers? The likeliest possibilties that spring to mind involve schtupping, nepotism, blackmail, any two of the above, or all three.

  120. Uncle Lumpy
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:53 pm [Reply]

    @Frank Lee Meidere (#110):

    … but when I used Google to check the spelling, for some reason I checked on Dvorak’s name instead.

    Just use a standard keyboard like the rest of humanity and you wouldn’t have that problem. (Young Spiff types Dvořák — makes me crazy when I need to borrow his laptop.)

    @Alter Ego (#119):

    … schtupping, nepotism, blackmail, any two of the above, or all three.

    “Hey, bro, publish my comic or I’ll tell Mom we screwed.”

  121. seismic-2
    February 20th, 2012 at 3:59 pm [Reply]

    @Alter Ego (#119): I think the best explanation for why Reply All is in the newspapers is that the Washington Post Syndicate (and indeed the Washington Post Comics section) is edited by a blind hunting dog.

  122. Baka Gaijin
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:00 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#Y16): I thought it was a plane passing overhead early this morning. Now I know I was hearing someone’s Google-gasm.

  123. Alter Ego
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:01 pm [Reply]

    @Uncle Lumpy (#120):

    “Hey, bro, publish my comic or I’ll tell Mom we screwed.”

    Precisely. I knew someone would figure out how to put all those together!

  124. Trillian
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:02 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#100): Where did you find this nomination form? Did WWII keep Cranky from finishing high school, too?

  125. Rixtremism in the Defense of Libertines
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:10 pm [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#23): Mary and Toby continue to disagree about Nola Wolvenson. Long-term forecasts suggest they will continue to disagree on this topic for the next week with a strong chance of daily repetition. Check in sometime next weekend to see if anything has actually happened…
    All the while Mary and Toby are drinking cup after cup of coffee without leaving the kitchen. I assume Mary is equipped with Depends, but Toby’s expression in panel 2 betrays her loss of control.

  126. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:11 pm [Reply]

    @Trillian (#124):

    Ol’ Barney Google led me to the nominating form, though I can’t find a list of enshrinees.

    http://www.centerville.k12.oh.us/Athletic_Hall_of_Fame

  127. Peanut Gallery
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:14 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#60): “Specialist Snowflake” is a character in the new, up-to-date Beetle Bailey. In our dreams.

    Momma – Nice use of “for whom”, at least. Refreshing. Also, interesting hats: Kufi, propeller beanie, fez, slab o’ slate, Brownie beanie.

  128. Rixtremism in the Defense of Libertines
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:34 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#101): Resisting urge to add a “but everyone knew her as Nancy” reference of some sort…
    You thinking Beatles? Or Firesign Theatre?

    Well, now I’m thinking: “Melanie Haber? Audrey Farber? Susan Underhill? Betty Jo Bialosky?”

  129. sully
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:35 pm [Reply]

    Seriously, couldn’t the hack that inflicts ‘Momma’ on the world clean up the spotty voice bubble of all those little specks, not to mention the ones scattered around the panel? It would take less than 5 minutes, which is probably longer than it took to (pardon the expression) ‘draw’ it.

  130. Trillian
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:36 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#126): So, Centerville, OH, isn’t just someplace that Batuik made up? It’s real? Wait a minute…it’s not near Cleveland at all! Much closer to Cincinnati. Cranky’s an Indians fan in Reds territory. Isn’t that kind of strange?

  131. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:37 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#116): Okay, got a chance to read upward in the thread a little. “The Norm.” Not bad. When people mentioned it before I think I thought they were talking about “My Cage” reprints.

  132. Little Guy
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:39 pm [Reply]

    Curtis: “Dear Gunk, I’m sorry your outdated but stabilizing marriage customs offend my American sensibilities. Love, Curtis. P.S. USA! USA! USA!”

    Candorville: This week’s winner of the “Quintuples 3000″ breaking news turnaround award.

    JP: Since everything is revealing at a quick pace, I’m hoping Monique turns out to be a Fembot.

  133. Marthas Rolling Pin
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:45 pm [Reply]

    With the reappearance of Mr. Google in his own strip, and with the Ghost having a lucha libre punchin’ good time, the Mark Streak now stands unchallenged: 487 days without a crushing right cross to some facial hair.

  134. Baka Gaijin
    February 20th, 2012 at 4:54 pm [Reply]

    @Marthas Rolling Pin (#133): AAAH! Not another one! You don’t hear from me counting (thankfully) from the last time a clown appeared in Blondie, do you???

    Did you (or anyone else reading this comment) notice that Mr. Google’s eyes aren’t as googly as they’d been in the past?

  135. tallyHO
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:07 pm [Reply]

    @sully (#129):

    Don’t know why the supposedly smartest comic strip cartoonists are the worst drawers but Mel Lazurus is as old as Jack Eldod and Methuselah combined.

    He’s also a member of Mensa. (which, sadly, I think I learned from a Simpsons episode.)

    Anyway, he just might still be drawing the strip and he was never that great at drawing in the first place, really. But, I wouldn’t call him or (if it is the case) someone who must imitate Lazurus’ style a hack.

  136. Anonymous
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:08 pm [Reply]

  137. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:09 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug (#87): So apparently even back then you *were* allowed to become a reformed criminal as long as you promised to retain a hideous appearance.
    See also: Stooge Villiers, who began as, well, a stooge. After being apprehended and serving his time, he reformed, and Dick was supportive of him from then on. He was framed one time, but that eventually got sorted out. And he was kind of ugly, but not freakishly so.

    @tallyHO (#93): *i think that is the only time I’ve ever typed that name. it doesn’t feel right…
    “Casper.” And by coincidence, something I watched the other day showed Fort Caspar, near Casper, Wyoming. Wikipedia says the town is spelled with an e because of a typo when registering the name.

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#96): CdS: So, um, what’s up with the art?
    Somebody gave a link yesterday that explains it (as have others today). Thompson is taking some time off to grapple with Parkinson’s, and six top artists are taking turns at it. One of them is named Ken, and is better known as “Ruben Bolling.” It should be an interesting few weeks, hopefully ending with the news that Thompson’s all better and will be for a long time.

    @Frank Lee Meidere (#103): It has been one (1) day since Nehemiah Scudder appeared in the Comics Curmudgeon which does not bear his name.
    Do anagrammatic nyms count?

    @Peanut Gallery (#127): “Specialist Snowflake” is a character in the new, up-to-date Beetle Bailey.
    I imagine him as something like SNAFU’s “Technical Fairy, Foist Class.”

  138. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:09 pm [Reply]

    @Trillian (#130):

    I’ve commented before that he should be a Reds fan. It is less than an hour’s drive from Centerville, as opposed to about four hours to the Mistake on the Lake.

    I remember watching a Bengals early season game against the Patriots there in 1975. Mid third quarter of a not-very-good game, and the crowd starts going crazy, cheering like mad for a 6-yard completion on 3rd an 8. I was confused until I learned that the other Cincinnati team had just scored two in the bottom of the ninth to take Game 2 of the World Series from Boston.

  139. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:10 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#134):

    Can’t a person get LASIK eye surgery without you calling them out?

  140. Anonymous
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:11 pm [Reply]

    @Pozzo (#8):
    White suit, white mustache = Mark Twain
    Any other clothes, white mustache = Sam Elliott
    Sam Elliott in a white suit = time crisis on infinite Earths

  141. The Talented Mr. Ripley
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:15 pm [Reply]

  142. Mibbitmaker
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:19 pm [Reply]

    In Batiukville, you can’t swing a 3-legged dead cat by the half-a-tail without hitting a person with only one arm.

  143. Shem
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:28 pm [Reply]

    @wossname (#28): According to the WaPo, the artists scheduled to fill in for Thompson include Jantze, Mo “Knuffle Bunny” Willems, Lincoln “Big Nate” Peirce, Ken “Tom the Dancing Bug” Fisher, Corey “Barkeater Lake” Pandolph, and Stephan “Pearls Before Swine” Pastis.

    Not a bad lineup. I’m especially curious to see how Pastis handles it…

  144. Poteet
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:29 pm [Reply]

    @The Spectacular Spider-Brick (#107): I saw an image from the TWILIGHT films in front of a movie theater yesterday and the three leads appeared to be victims of a hideous makeup disaster. I’d be afraid to go in.

  145. seismic-2
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:30 pm [Reply]

    @Anonymous (#140): No, it’s Hal Holbrook, in Sam Elliot Tonight

  146. Ned Ryerson
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:40 pm [Reply]

    Centerville, a real nice place to raise your kids up.

  147. Anachrosaurus
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:41 pm [Reply]

    @Old School Allie Cat (#5):
    PS to GBT: Did the bodacious lady from Friday leave her number? Looked like a way more stable prospect than Frazzled Annoying Girl.

  148. Shrug
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:41 pm [Reply]

    @Frank Lee Meidere (#110):

    “But it was Dvorak who wrote The Nutcracker Suite, right?”

    I thought it was HAMMY THE SQUIRREL!!!!!

  149. The Ridger
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:42 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#145): I would SO watch that!

  150. Marc
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:42 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#135): Never, ever be ashamed of learn things from The Simpsons.

  151. Marc
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:43 pm [Reply]

    And apparently I haven’t learned how to proofread because it’s “learning” with an ing.

  152. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:44 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#121): Oh, I was thinking that the WashPost comics section was headed by those monkeys from the Career Builder commercials. You know how monkeys are: flingin’ crap, flingin’ Reply All.

  153. Mibbitmaker
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:45 pm [Reply]

    @The Talented Mr. Ripley (#141):

    From the article:

    and even paraded a former football player around the office to intimidate people. …A judge… fined her $500 over the ex-football player’s visit and vowed to appoint a temporary receiver to protect the company’s assets

    A wide receiver, of course.

  154. Shrug
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:53 pm [Reply]

    @Ned Ryerson (#146):

    “Centerville, a real nice place to raise your kids up.”

    “I’m Eddie Crank Blackheart, the (wannabe-Cleveland-) Indian of the group.”

  155. gnome de blog
    February 20th, 2012 at 5:55 pm [Reply]

    Summer will hit the championship-winning shot at the buzzer. Les will smirk. Then he will write another book about Lisa. Cayla will divorce him immediately after the wedding, demanding half the royalties.

    It will slowly dawn on Summer that she’s hit the high point of her life at age 16 and that it’s all downhill from there. The pressure to win another championship as a senior will be unbearable, and the Scapegoatettes (Scapenannies?) will get bounced out of the playdowns in the second round. The failure will be far greater than if they had never won at all. Summer’s life will spiral out of control. She and Corey Winkerbean will shoplift matching purple shirts and commit armed robbery at Montoni’s. They will skip town in a ’72 Chevy Nova and end up in Milford, Michigan where they will blow their ill-gotten wealth on tattoos.

  156. Jamus The Bartender
    February 20th, 2012 at 6:03 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#47): I hear you, Queek. Five minutes ago, Cassandra tore through here, cussing up a storm, something about not having a job in months, and here’s ” Weber’s little whores, ‘Britney Fox and Christina Mouse, the Party Girls.’ “, before she went off to the tavern for a drink.

  157. Tallybo
    February 20th, 2012 at 6:03 pm [Reply]

    It seems only natural that when something good finally happens in Funkyverse it would come in the guise of girls’ sports where no matter how great the accomplishment it is almost always met with yawns and indifference.

  158. gnome de blog
    February 20th, 2012 at 6:04 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#138):
    Why would anybody go to a Bengals game if the Reds were in the Series? They do have TV in Cincinnati, don’t they?

  159. AhClem
    February 20th, 2012 at 6:21 pm [Reply]

    @Ned Ryerson (#146): @Shrug (#154):
    They’ve got churches. Churches and liquor stores!

  160. Frank Lee Meidere
    February 20th, 2012 at 6:24 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#137):

    Do anagrammatic nyms count?

    No — it’s obviously an impersonator. Nehemiah would never write “Your welcome.”

    Unless, of course, he was referring to somebody’s personal welcome, such as, “Your welcome was much appreciated.”

  161. Alison
    February 20th, 2012 at 6:25 pm [Reply]

    Marvin’s grandfather needs a second job? I had no idea he even had a first job. He looks to be about 70 years old. I assumed he and his wife were retired and lived with Marvin’s parents by choice. (Something nobody would actually do in real life.)

  162. tallyHO
    February 20th, 2012 at 6:28 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#137):

    Casper.
    Thanks.
    I’m sure I have corrected others for that same error. But, quite frankly, I wasn’t too concerned with being accurate. Subconsciously, perhaps I think of CasPAR being similar to subPAR.

  163. Little Guy
    February 20th, 2012 at 6:40 pm [Reply]

    What’s Opera, Spidey? “Kill da EmmmmmmJaaaaaay, Kill da EmmmmmmJaaaaaay, Kill da EmmmmmmJaaaaaay……”

    (“Oh no! Smog! My webs won’t work!”)

  164. odinthor
    February 20th, 2012 at 6:43 pm [Reply]

    @Frank Lee Meidere (#160):

    I’m sure he meant “your’e,” as in Understand Your’e Swede. It’s an easy slip to make.

    Of course, Snuffy would solve the whole problem with “yer.”

  165. tb4000
    February 20th, 2012 at 6:52 pm [Reply]

    Judge Parker, where the constant danger of having your eye poked out is very, very real.

  166. Frank Lee Meidere
    February 20th, 2012 at 6:55 pm [Reply]

    @odinthor (#164): Of course he did — I’ve done the same thing. But that’s where the imposter slipped up — Nehemiah Scudder doesn’t make mistakes.

  167. Here Come ole Flattoop
    February 20th, 2012 at 6:59 pm [Reply]

    @tb4000 (#165): I really appreciate a keen wit. No, really.

  168. farfaraway
    February 20th, 2012 at 7:03 pm [Reply]

    A3G: Is it just me or does everybody get the ad about mites living in teddy bears and causing asthma attacs in small children just next to the comic? Just wondering.

  169. Der Schnärkïnätör
    February 20th, 2012 at 7:09 pm [Reply]

    @tb4000 (#165):

    Judge Parker, where the constant danger of having your eye poked out is very, very real.

    I hope that they’re nice and soft – otherwise you could get hurt pretty badly if you hugged her!

    But what a way to go!

  170. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    February 20th, 2012 at 7:15 pm [Reply]

    @gnome de blog (#158):

    “Why would anybody go to a Bengals game if the Reds were in the Series?”

    Well, some people had season tickets. Some, like me at age 9, weren’t really baseball fans. The Bengals actually were a pretty good team that year – they went 11-3. Nothing compared to the legendary Big Red Machine, but they had Ken Anderson at QB and were consistently competitive.

    This was back in the days before stadium video screens and the like, there wasn’t a big announcement that the Reds had just won their game. A lot of fans were following the Reds on the radio while at the football game, so there was this growing creschendo of cheers as word spread.

  171. HAMMY THE SQUIRREL!
    February 20th, 2012 at 7:17 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug (#148):
    I DIDN’T WRITE IT BUT THAT IS THE NAME OF MY OFFICE!!

    nutcracker is also my job description

  172. Ichi
    February 20th, 2012 at 7:25 pm [Reply]

  173. Frank Lee Meidere
    February 20th, 2012 at 7:33 pm [Reply]

    @Ichi (#172): You know what’s really interesting about that? The facial expressions work just as well (or even better) than the original.

  174. wossname
    February 20th, 2012 at 7:34 pm [Reply]

    @Shem (#143): Thanks! I love Tom the Dancing Bug. Don’t follow the others (except obviously PBS) but maybe I’ll start after they show off their chops on Alice and Petey. And Dill.

  175. wossname
    February 20th, 2012 at 7:40 pm [Reply]

    @gnome de blog (#155): Gnome! Good to hear from you. Long time no post! Or have I just not been paying attention?

  176. Donkey Hotey
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:00 pm [Reply]

    @sporknpork (#51): You’re right! That looks EXACTLY like the wall-mounted CRT television in my classroom, right down to the bracket it’s hanging from. I look nothing like Mark Twain, however.

  177. A Smirch Unheeded
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:10 pm [Reply]

    @Frank Lee Meidere (#166): I saw the “your” immediately after I posted, but I thought, hell, who expects Smirch to be perfect? Not like he’s Nehemiah or anything. No need for an immediate “oops” post.

    Perfection is like sincerity, you know, once you can fake it, you’ve got it made.

  178. gnome de blog
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:15 pm [Reply]

    @wossname (#175):
    No, I’ve been pretty quiet lately. Thanks for noticing. And it’s comforting to see that Precisiona (@wossname (#17): re Mary Worth) is still on the case.

  179. A Smirch Unheeded
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:21 pm [Reply]

    @A Smirch Unheeded (#177): Who expects Ride Dem Haunches to be perfect, either? I shall tell him that when next we meet.

  180. Baka Gaijin
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:50 pm [Reply]

    @gnome de blog (#178): Have the clowns been nibbling at your DSL line, too?

  181. Sisi
    February 20th, 2012 at 8:54 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#152): The Washington Post is pay-for-play these days (so are other papers, but on WaPo it shows more because of what it used to be). The bad comics come free with certain columnists; they appeal to an upmarket subset of the same Plugger demographic.

  182. Rocky Stoneaxe
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:15 pm [Reply]

    Monday’s Reality Check mocks an actual disease — and will probably get Whamond’s comic dropped from newspapers:

    http://www.gocomics.com/realitycheck/2012/02/20

    T’aint funny, McGee!

  183. commodorejohn
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:22 pm [Reply]

    @Rocky Stoneaxe (#182): On top of which, it’s rehashing a joke that Weird Al Yankovich did better in 2003!

  184. seismic-2
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:38 pm [Reply]

    @wossname (#174): Upcoming CdS fill-in cartoonist Lincoln Peirce’s [pronounced "purse"] daily strip, Big Nate, is perhaps the closest in subject matter to CdS, since it is about a middle-school kid, his school, his friends, and his family. The tone is of course different from CdS, so it will be interesting to see whether he can keep from lapsing. Here’s an interview with him, in case you’re curious.

  185. teenchy
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:49 pm [Reply]

  186. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    February 20th, 2012 at 9:58 pm [Reply]

    @Sisi (#181): Except that I don’t think Reply All came bundled with anything; Donna A. Lewis is a local (DC) person, and the WashPost took her on—and syndicates her, too, in order to inflict the misery on other newspapers. Worse, Reply All takes up valuable print-paper real estate (which is where I read gape at it in horror; I refuse to click on it on the website and let some monkey-editor think that I’m a fan).

  187. Sequitur
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:07 pm [Reply]

    Yes! It all makes sense now!

  188. MapDark
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:28 pm [Reply]

    9cl : McEldowney , you DO KNOW there were films made after the 1950′s right?

    MW : TOBY! STOP DRINKING THIS COFFEE! It’s magically turning you into a Mary clone!

    A3G : You know thaty , right? RIIIIGHT?! OMG MARGO TELL ME YOU KNOOOOW ! I DON’T WANT PEOPLE TO THINK I’M A FREAKY MAN CHILD!

  189. Anonymous
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:33 pm [Reply]

    What school would name itself “Big Walnut!?”

    (Checks Wikipedia)

    Apparently two schools O_o
    Well, if a school admits they have big nuts who am I to contradict them?

  190. Browns fan
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:46 pm [Reply]

    Marvin: Roy needs a Linkedin account…….can you imagine? Skip the picture, because Hee Haw isn’t currently hiring extras.

  191. Écureuil Écumant
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:49 pm [Reply]

    FW: After wasting precious class time watching lame in-house sports reports, they will struggle through community college and end up working two jobs, bunking at their folks’ shabby duplex, cursing their backwater economy and praying for sweet, sweet malignant quietus.

  192. Poteet
    February 20th, 2012 at 10:49 pm [Reply]

    FW– As someone who disliked sports from the moment of conception, I’m glad I went to high school too soon to have to watch sports being discussed on large TV screens in classrooms. My glum facial expression would have meant “I can’t believe I have to listen to this kind of shit in science class.”

  193. Écureuil Écumant
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:11 pm [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#186): I’m sure it’s all about cross-marketing. One of these nights after a Danica Patrick GoDaddy commercial, I’m sure we’ll see Donna A. Lewis plugging a dog obedience school, or her very own tomalley-based hair conditioner.

  194. Écureuil Écumant
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:15 pm [Reply]

    @Anonymous (#189): Well, Georgetown U’s school “chant” is “Hoya Saxa”, a Latin-Greek bastardization that translates as “What Rocks”.

  195. True Fable
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:25 pm [Reply]

  196. mrvy
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:32 pm [Reply]

    Happy Mardi Gras tomorrow! Pancakes for dinner! So begins my fast from blogs until Easter Sunday.

  197. Tangerine
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:35 pm [Reply]

    @teenchy (#25): Teenchy, I thought the same thing! I firmly believe it’s a self-tribute, as it were, since Josh has a trifecta of nerdiness in his knowledge of history, interest in trivia, and technical editing/blog-managing skills. Does he play RPG, unbeknownst to us? If so, he could have a quadfecta, if that’s a thing.

  198. S. Marty Pannts
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:37 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#187): EXACTLY!! I KNEW I couldn’t be the only person to figure this out, considering all the brainpower here. We were snookered by Barney aka Nehemiah!

  199. Cloudbuster
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:41 pm [Reply]

  200. Comcis Fan
    February 20th, 2012 at 11:51 pm [Reply]

    Agree that Momma saw Clint Eastwood’s Chrysler ad, which begs the question: Was Momma watching the Superbowl for the ads, the game or the tight football pants?

  201. Gold-Digging Nanny
    February 21st, 2012 at 12:02 am [Reply]

    Probably because I’ve been reading some Sherlock Holmes graphic novels lately, it occurs to me that Mary Worth could be much improved by having Mary fail in her attempts to meddle Nola away from the dark side, but giving the unrepentant and unrehabilitated Nola a recurring role in the strip. She could be the Moriarty to Mary’s Holmes, leading astray the very people Mary tries to advise. I think we’ve been missing that. An antagonist would be especially nice, but I think we primarily miss coming across someone that the infallible Mary can’t help. Aldo was a little like that, but unfortunately, he was no Moriarty. When he went over the cliff, he didn’t take Mary with him.

  202. Poteet
    February 21st, 2012 at 12:12 am [Reply]

    @Gold-Digging Nanny (#201): What a great idea.

  203. agony
    February 21st, 2012 at 12:23 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#137):

    That’s the third time in two days that I’ve seen someone correct the spelling of the Friendly Ghost’s name – and on three different websites. A coincidence like that needs to mean something. Maybe I’d better update my will.

  204. Victory Garden
    February 21st, 2012 at 12:27 am [Reply]

    @Anachrosaurus (#147):
    No, I’m pretty sure she bowed out gracefully. Besides, isn’t that woman Toggle’s mom’s age?

    I ship Alex and Leo! Internet romances 4 LYFE.

  205. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    February 21st, 2012 at 12:45 am [Reply]

    @agony (#203): I wouldn’t have bothered with it, but tH said typing it didn’t feel right. But now it’s got me wondering why the name is spelled with an -e- instead of the second -a-. Not so much that I won’t be asleep in a few minutes, fortunately.

  206. Droopy Says
    February 21st, 2012 at 1:16 am [Reply]

    The Amusing Spiderman: Now Thor gets it? Why couldn’t he have had this revelation before Loki sent him to earth? Just think, instead of this slow, pointless non-story, we could be reading some other slow, pointless non-story.

    Crankshat: And the younger generation thinks “How did he find out we hired a hit man?”

    Creepy Les: Is that a one-armed bandleader or a cyclops? How did she lose an eye–of course! She’s removing body parts one at a time and shipping them out of Westview to be reassembled somewhere else! Soon there will be nothing left but her smirk, which will fool people into thinking she’s still all present and accounted for. It’s a clever if painful way to escape the Funkyverse.

    Mock Trail: And as Trail hugs his ascotted, porn-stashed “friend” he whispers “Careful, Tommy doesn’t quite understand what kind of movies you make.”

  207. Dale
    February 21st, 2012 at 1:22 am [Reply]

    @Poteet (#192):

    The only way this makes sense is if it’s first period and they’re watching the school announcements for the day.
    When I saw it in the paper (b&w), all I could think was: These fools take time out of every class to watch the local news?

  208. ElkMeadow
    February 21st, 2012 at 1:40 am [Reply]

    Is the Mama cartoon a comment of Clint’s Superbowl ad? Because I don’t get either of them.

    MW Mary’s next victim sidesteps her with a “not this week.” How Dare She! She just simply did it.

    RMMD Major Sob Story ahead….wait, if she was going to clean up Foster’s debts, then why the heck does she need that $25,000? And why would…never mind. It’s Rex Morgan; it’s not going to make any sense at all (and after this arc, we still have the school principal with the fake Army record and the war widow to deal with.)

    Meanwhile, over at Sailor Twain, things are going full-tilt ahead!

  209. This Guy
    February 21st, 2012 at 2:40 am [Reply]

    @Dale (#207): Which they are, apparently; the announcer is the coach’s unwanted daughter, Jinx.

  210. Chip Whittle
    February 21st, 2012 at 2:52 am [Reply]

    @Comcis Fan (#200):

    Agree that Momma saw Clint Eastwood’s Chrysler ad, which begs the question: Was Momma watching the Superbowl for the ads, the game or the tight football pants?

    Momma was watching the Super Bowl to see if her children accidentally took any pleasure from any segment of it, so she’d know which parts to smother with guilt, which parts with passive-aggressiveness, and which parts to use to make Freud’s head explode.

  211. A Smirch Unheeded
    February 21st, 2012 at 3:08 am [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#187): Thanks, that’s effulgent!

  212. Cal
    February 21st, 2012 at 3:12 am [Reply]

    MT (2-21-2012): “You know me, Mark. I’m in and out!” And in. And out. And in. And out…

    Doonesbury: Oh, break my heart! *sniff*

  213. Frank Lee Meidere
    February 21st, 2012 at 3:22 am [Reply]

    @Cal (#212): Steve has got a squeeze box/Marky doesn’t sleep at night.

  214. Frank Lee Meidere
    February 21st, 2012 at 3:28 am [Reply]

    Dog Eat Doug: Any comic that mentions a Firefly marathon is good with me.

  215. jnik
    February 21st, 2012 at 3:38 am [Reply]

    Momma: Or perhaps she liked Eastwood’s Super Bowl ad!

  216. Ride dem haunches
    February 21st, 2012 at 3:39 am [Reply]

    @A Smirch Unheeded (#211): I think Nehemiah Scudder taught us all three things:
    1. Never give up on your dreams. Justice must prevail.
    2. Fulgent, effulgent, and refulgent all mean pretty much the same thing.
    3. Slide rules are never off topic.
    4. Somniculous is a perfectly good word…

    Oh, wait. I’ll come in again. Amongst the things Reverend Scudder taught us…

  217. Mr. O'Malley
    February 21st, 2012 at 4:12 am [Reply]

    MW: A thought balloon being transmitted by telephone?

    BGSS: So this is the summit? Yahoo meets Google?

  218. Kate
    February 21st, 2012 at 5:55 am [Reply]

    Momma is sooo funny, i want to have someone like her in my life! :))

  219. John C Fremont
    February 21st, 2012 at 6:32 am [Reply]

    MT – I see by your outfit that you are a filmmaker.

    GT – No, not “Onya.” It’s “Anya.” “Good Anya.” See, she used to be this vengeance demon…

  220. gleeb
    February 21st, 2012 at 7:34 am [Reply]

    Phantom: First Tiger gets back to his real love, swordplay.

  221. Whippersnapper
    February 21st, 2012 at 8:16 am [Reply]

    MW: “It’s not a good week, Mary- I’ve misplaced my neck.”

  222. fausto
    February 21st, 2012 at 11:18 am [Reply]

    FW: Westview’s a little suburb, right? So what news channel are they all watching? Cable community access? Losers.

  223. fausto
    February 21st, 2012 at 11:22 am [Reply]

    FW: With Batiuk’s crush on DC comics, you’d think he’d at least have his mopers watching the news feed from a bigger, more glamorous market like Gotham City or Metropolis.

  224. the___ninth
    February 21st, 2012 at 11:51 am [Reply]

    Hey, is that Dennis Farina standing in the back of the room in Funky Winkerbean?

  225. Pippy the Ziphead
    February 21st, 2012 at 1:03 pm [Reply]

    Yes! Something good is happening in Funky! The arrival of the ghost of Mark Twain is always an omen of good things to come!

  226. Patrick
    February 21st, 2012 at 9:36 pm [Reply]

    I like the idea of Kurt Vonnegut watching the Funkyverse sports news and thinking, “So it goes…”

  227. Leonard
    February 24th, 2012 at 11:40 pm [Reply]

    FW: Team bus will go into flames… killing off all the next generation of characters but will keep Bull alive to cry in guilt every day.

  228. Kavonde
    September 23rd, 2012 at 12:03 am [Reply]

    I’m on an archive binge, here, and holy CRAP. That “Momma” strip is seriously creeping me out. Had it run just a few weeks ago, it would have been relevant, made sense, and even been kind of funny. The fact that it ran in February makes me worry that “Momma’s” writer is a latent psychic, and I’m really hoping he or she never make any jokes about World War III.

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