Archive: Funky Winkerbean

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Funky Winkerbean, 9/10/19

Hey, everyone, did you catch the fun comics news in the Grey Lady yesterday? It turns out that this week’s strips, in which a CTE-addled Bull obsessively washes the family laundry over and over again, isn’t just another round of the usual CTE-addled laffs that we’ve come to expect. Nope, according to a big, spoilers-heavy article in the New York Times, it’s just the setup for a month-long storyline that climaxes with … (wait for it) … (stop reading now if you don’t want to learn the extremely predictable denouement to all this, I guess) … Bull’s suicide! Did you worry that Lisa’s demise, being brought about more or less by random chance, wasn’t bad enough??? Well, good news, the character deaths in Funky Winkerbean are just going to get more grim from here on in, and will continue until all the demands are met.

Mark Trail, 9/10/19

Fortunately Mark Trail is a tragedy-free zone, which means that Mark probably isn’t going to be eaten by a yeti. I do enjoy that Doc has stood up in the background between panels; perhaps he assumed that, having managed to survive a desert flash flood, he’d proven his mettle and would now be Mark’s permanent companion on adventures. His facial expression in panel two indicates that he’s terribly disappointed to be displaced by some kind of freakish camel-scientist hybrid.

Shoe, 9/10/19

Shoe of course is a leader on the funny pages among strips that telegraph to us how little any of the characters want to be there or to be participating in the “jokes” or “wordplay” therein. We’re all familiar with the Patented Shoe Goggle Eyes Of Horror, but I’m fond of today’s more subtle offering, in which the Perfesser leans away from Roz between panels, as if to get as far away from this “punchline” as possible without actually getting up.

Gasoline Alley, 9/10/19

The Gasoline Alley characters, meanwhile, are proud of their punchlines! So proud they need to explain them to one another, at great length, to make sure that everyone is on the same page.

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Mary Worth, 9/1/19

I’m honestly very excited to see how Dawn, overwhelmed by her feelings, manages to square the circle so that Hugo can return to his country but they can stay together as long as they both want that. Will she clone both of them so that each of them can stay in their home nation while enjoying each other’s company? Annex France to the United States? Annex the United States to France? Let Hugo go home, then “surprise” him by showing up in Paris unannounced and declaring that she’s his full-time girlfriend now, possibly after lurking in the bushes to spy on him and any French lovers he may have, the way only a Weston can? It’s probably that last one, isn’t it?

Funky Winkerbean, 9/1/19

The last couple weeks of Funkyplot have been taken up with Mindy meeting and learning from (fictional) female comics pioneer Ruby Lith. And what better way to honor the legacy of all the real-life put-upon female comic book artists Ruby represents than to offer a tip of the Funky felt tip to [squints] Rob Ro and Thom Zahler, two male comic book artists?

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Six Chix, 8/21/19

  1. “And ostriches run fast, so I’m hoping to best you in this competition!”
  2. “So perhaps I have my head in the sand about my athletic abilities.”
  3. “The better to kick the crap out of you, my dear!”
  4. “That’s why this punchline laid an egg!”

Dustin, 8/21/19

All week these folks have been getting bummed out by the news. A word of advice, Dustin people — stay away from the comics!

Funky Winkerbean, 8/21/19

“Well, of course you’re the only colorist they have. Until you get replaced by some Bangladeshi outsourcer! Or some discount freelancer on Fiverr! But hey: I hear you’re engaged to be married to Mopey Pete! God, your life sucks! I’m so grateful to be old and near death.”

Hi and Lois, 8/21/19

“Nature, red in tooth and claw” seems a little off-brand for Hi and Lois.


— Uncle Lumpy