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Archive: Marvin

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The shirt was designed by someone who likes mud as a concept, it’s not licensed merch

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Gil Thorp, 5/12/23

Gil Thorp is notorious for bringing back beloved characters from years past, and so when I recognized Gregg Hamm’s name I was excited to see how far back in my archives my search for him was going to take me, but it turns out that all the Gil Thorp plots have blurred together into one big timeless smear in my mind, because Gregg’s story was from the summer of 2022, when he managed to pitch while tragically blind thanks to a little light cheating on the part of his teammates. And while I joked about his “tragic blindness” a lot I never really got the impression that he had anything other than just bad vision, but now here he is with a white cane and everything! I’m pretty sure I saw new writer Henry Barajas say that there’s supposed to be a time jump of a few years between Neal Rubin’s last storyline and his first one, but I’d like to believe that he’s fully lost his sight in the past year, and now is going to transform the 2023 Mudlark team by teaching them how to “feel the catcher’s signals.”

Rex Morgan, M.D., 5/12/23

OK, we’ve been joking a lot about how Yvonne has been a little fixated on hearing Mud play “Muddy Boots” one last time, just for her sake, but clearly she cannot hold a candle to these two Mud Mountain Murphy superfans who have presumably spent the last 24 hours or however long it’s been since Fergus’ previous concert in a state of deep depression and/or rage. Those facial expressions tell me that they’re in the midst of near-orgasmic ecstacy at the return of their hero, and probably were planning a suicide attack of some sort on him if he hadn’t returned to form tonight.

Marvin, 5/12/23

Obviously I’m never happy to see or think about Marvin, the character, but I kind of like knowing that even when I don’t see him, he’s busy making the lives of the other characters in the strip miserable, because honestly I’m not a big fan of those people either.

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I just … B.O. Plenty, you guys, I dunno

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Dick Tracy, 4/28/23

I sort of forgot to mention that it seemed for a minute like the game-themed crime bullshit in Dick Tracy might take a turn into furry stuff, which, whatever you might think of furry stuff and Dick Tracy separately, it’s pretty funny when the two of them come together. But alas there’s been this week-long detour into a whole thing where [sigh] B.O. Plenty has a sexy cousin named Klinique (?), and she and a chicken named “Chick Tracy II” (because the original Chick Tracy died/was eaten???) are going to be on a commercial together, and let me tell you, the vibe is like a million times less wholesome than any furry stuff would’ve been.

Marvin, 4/28/23

Ha ha, it’s funny because Bitsy has a ghost for a roommate! Just the damned soul of, well, a dog, I guess, or maybe some other creature that’s howling endlessly on the spectral plane, having been driven mad by its endless liminal state between this world and the next that for whatever reason it cannot escape. That’s just wacky good fun!

Mary Worth, 4/28/23

“Like, for instance, I was like, ‘Remember that guy you went on a date with a year ago? What happened with that? Maybe you should ask him out again.’ And then you did! Now you owe me everything”

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Tuesday is for oldsters

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 4/18/23

Oh no, Hank Jr. must either give in to that nagging feeling he has about “Dr. Mirakle” and follow that thread no matter how far it goes or what kind of seedy underworld of fraud and violence it takes him to, or he could forget all about it and go back to his cabin and fool around with his wife. Sounds like a tough choice, I know, but keep in mind that if he “solves” the Dr. Mirakle caper, absolutely nobody will give a shit, so clearly that’s the route he’s going to take.

Marvin, 4/18/23

Every once in a while they make an “old guys doing crimes” movie with beloved older actors, like Tough Guys (1986, Burt Lancaster and Kirk Douglas) or Going In Style (2017, Morgan Freeman, Michael Caine, and Alan Arkin), along with probably some other ones in the intervening 30 years that I’m forgetting. These movies are never really big hits but there’s a built-in audience, which is to say old people, and since old people are also the most important audience for newspaper comics, Marvin could definitely do worse than have a whole subplot where Roy and Bernie’s new friend Earl pulls them into a life of crime, providing a kind of thrill in their later years that they thought they’d never recapture. Or, you know, the strip could instead have one joke about a guy who can’t stop wearing a ski mask, ha ha, then it’s right back into the poop jokes.

Mary Worth, 4/18/23

Dr. Ed is out here proving that you don’t have to follow annoying technicalities like “labor law” when you GOT THAT GOOD DICK