The Comics Curmudgeon

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Mostly soap opera sex Tuesday

Apartment 3-G, 1/22/08

I swear I’m not obsessed with the sex life of the Apartment 3-G girls. If anything, I’m obsessed with how any feature that’s about three single young women in New York City can be marked by such a stunning lack of sex, which, I’ll try gamely to argue, isn’t quite the same thing. Anyhoo, I’m always open for any hint that I might be wrong, and we’re getting some hints today. Note that Lu Ann isn’t responding to Tommie coming home in the morning with “OH MY GOD TOMMIE WHERE WERE YOU WERE YOU KIDNAPPED??” but “Huh, you’re not wearing the same clothes you left the house in last night, plus I don’t see any hickeys.” So, while Tommie didn’t get lucky last night (obviously, ’cause she’s Tommie), the idea isn’t completely out of the question for even goody-goody Lu Ann.

It’s also possible that goody-goody Lu Ann thinks that Tommie and Gary engaged in some “Naughty Nurse”-style role play after their date, and is goody-goody enough that even this extremely mild kink would drive her to two question marks’ worth of shock.

I can’t really remember — is Dr. Kelly another bland lookalike vying half-heartedly for Tommie’s affection? It’s nice to be wanted and all, but I have to imagine that forcing a lady to leave in the middle of a date just so she can sew together New Years Eve drunks with you rates pretty high on the old Actionable-Sexual-Harrasment-O-Meter.

Mary Worth, 1/22/08

Panel two proves that the absence of ESP is in fact an evolutionary advantage: if your potential partners could hear what you were thinking in the moments leading up to sex, nobody would ever reproduce. I’m not sure if Drew is supposed to be adjusting his nonexistent bow tie or if he’s just relishing the thought so intently that he’s unbuttoning his shirt right there in the local cafe.

Marmaduke, 1/22/08

A roving pack of semi-feral dogs has eaten fourteen elderly residents of the neighborhood so far, luring them to deserted parks with promises of companionship and pizza. Authorities urge citizens to stay indoors until the National Guard can defeat the savage canines.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, January 22, 2008 at 10:49 am and is filed under Apartment 3-G, Marmaduke, Mary Worth.

302 responses to “Mostly soap opera sex Tuesday”

Electro
January 22nd, 2008 at 10:54 am [Reply]

It’s funny how in panel one, Dr. Drew caught his own reflection in a mirror in the cafe, and thus can honestly agree that it is good to see himself. Thought balloon if there had been space: “God, I’m a stud!”
One-eyed Wolfdog
January 22nd, 2008 at 10:57 am [Reply]

“They want to know if you’d like to go hang out at the Pizza Shack, or if you’d rather be lain down on a hassock and doggy gang-raped while holding a squeaky toy between your teeth. The big one says he’s not picky.”
thecrock
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:00 am [Reply]

How does this lady know what the dogs are saying?
Grover Cleveland
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:02 am [Reply]

3G: The accent seems to be on the wrong word in the last panel. Wouldn’t most people say “Can he do that?!” rather than “Can he do that?!”?
Grover Cleveland
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:05 am [Reply]

MW: Drew is reaching for his phial of roofies, which he keeps concealed in his collar stays.
Hooray For Socks!
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:08 am [Reply]

Wow, can’t believe I’m getting in this early on a thread! Anyway, it looks like Drew is so desperate to get laid, he’s going to get undressed right there in the cafe – which is either make everyone ill, or go into fits of uncontrollable laughter… and hopefully send Vera sprinting for the door.
AhClem
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:11 am [Reply]

MW – In the first panel, Vera looks like she’s about to claw the jacket right off Dr. Drew’s body — not out of any sense of passion, but to save herself and those around her from having to continue looking at that visual horror.

A3G — Josh, regarding your commentary, I believe that LuAnn is using a single interrobang, not two question marks. Why she is doing so, as well as emphasizing “THAT”, is something known only to LuAnn and her monoxide-soaked brain.
Hooray For Socks!
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:12 am [Reply]

#6 – me – *either going to make everyone ill…*

Sheesh! :)
Cranky
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:13 am [Reply]

I think Vera has taken Dr. Drew to the Milk Bar from A Clockwork Orange. The guy in panel one is thinking, “What drugs have they laced my delicious beverage with today?”

Later, a bit of the old ultraviolence.
Maughta
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:32 am [Reply]

I’m a big fan of this new tradition. More soap opera sex! It’s gotta beat Pibgorn.
rocketbride
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:35 am [Reply]

i’m starting to think of drew as being played by john lovitz. it helps me get through the dialogue.
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:35 am [Reply]

Drew and Vera’s body language — yesterday even more so — is reminiscent of what it might be like to witness a show of affection between Al Gore and Ed Sullivan.

http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20080121&name=Mary_Worth
Loopina
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:38 am [Reply]

H&J: And dog feces. Don’t forget the dog feces.

C(MD): Ha ha! Cathy’s fat!
Edgy DC
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:39 am [Reply]

Lu Ann doesn’t make sense because she’s trying to redirect after being caught by a roommate in the middle of drinking out of the carton.
Hooray For Socks!
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:41 am [Reply]

#11- rocketbride –
LOL – what about Steve Buscemi?? Creepy, yet funny… :)
Gagott68
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:48 am [Reply]

Zits: So, Jeremy is stalking Viral and damaging our fragile environment.

MT: Lucky the sniper always misses the first shot. Any I can’t believe Mark would ask why anyone would shoot at him. I think the question is, “Why doesn’t everyone try to shoot at him?”

Dilbert: Finally, someone is going to explain what my wife does for a living.

Luann: Of for crying out loud. Enough of that already. I want to see more of Tiffany’s slow descent into madness and revenge.

GT: Ahhhh, looks like Coach Gil is finally taking my coaching advice. If only the Packers head coach had done the same on Sunday. Sigh.
Moon Mullins
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:49 am [Reply]

I so have the urge to yank on that whiskbroom/dolled-up horse tail/velvet line divider on the back of Vera’s head. I bet if you pull it, you hear a gong that summons the butler.
Nate
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:51 am [Reply]

Panel one of Mary Worth just proves what I’ve known all along: Drew is so retarded that when you speak to him you have to grab him by both shoulders – gently – and look him directly in the eyes. The big mistake – and what’s up for tomorrow – is that she let go and turned away. Drew’s unbuttoning his shirt because, like most retarded, he is easily panicked. Next installment: Drew, naked, stands on a table in public, screaming, covered in his own filth.
Loopina
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:53 am [Reply]

HoTC: WTF is up with that creepy picture on the wall? That would give me nightmares.

FC: For someone who is supposedly looking forward to his favorite meal, Billy looks awfully morose. I’m thinking he went in the kitchen, critisized the meal, and Mommy gave him a swift boot to the head. “Leftovers are my favorite… I love them *ever* so much.”
Moon Mullins
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:56 am [Reply]

#16 Gagott: So far people seem to think that Jeremy’s arrest is for stalking. But merely driving around the same cul-de-sac, although awfully suspicious, and doubtless would make some neighbor alert the authorities, is unlikely to result in an arrest. The average cop would just tell the kid to beat it.

But Jeremy’s offense will be he was driving without a license! He just got his learner’s permit in a recent strip.
Gagott68
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:57 am [Reply]

SF: So the softball team got a restraining order against Ted? Maybe they can help Viral fill out the petition for one against Jeremy.

S-M: She’s a “Movie Star” and about to realize that having a mope-about would-be superhero husband does nothing for her image and career. Maybe she’ll make a deal with some supervillian to eradicate any memory of her marriage. Oh yeah, they don’t actually have supervillians in this strip. Just BGH injected henchmen with silly hair and quilted neurotics with vibrators strapped to their ams. How silly of me.
Gagott68
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:59 am [Reply]

20. No, I don’t think the arrest is for stalking. But that’s what he was doing in a manner of speaking. And in Chicago, the average cop would have hand cuffed him to a wheel chair and clubbed him over the head several times. Or at least I wish they would.
El Santo
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:00 pm [Reply]

Oh, Dr. Drew. Only you could turn what passes for double entendres in the Mary Worth universe and turn it into a vaudeville act.
Jamus The Bartender
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:02 pm [Reply]

Tuesday Snarks…
9CL: Mmmm…Edda.
Talk Dirtily To Me.
Rub your pantilies in my face.
Tell me i’m a filthily pig.
Be nastily to me.
FOOB: April, you’re a better grandchild than I ever was.
Dick Tracy: So….Dick. Have a seat. Did you let the succubus have her way with you? Did she make you feel shame? Ah well, you oughta be used to that sort of thing with Tess* drumshot*
Ah…I kid. Here, have a grain and prune juice shooter. Get drunkily. It’s on me.
Slylock Fox: This was a Kids In The Hall sketch. Dave Foley fell asleep on the job while Scott Thompson was laying cement.
My Cage: Strangely enough, that was why I kept working at my current place of business. I’d have quit but they kept paying me more money.
Funky Winkerbean: Band Moms=Groupies.
I’ve heard worse.
Are these band moms like soccer moms?
Like…really hot?
Nice one today Batiuk.
Judge Parker: Yeah. That’s cool. The vet showing his independence firmly but politely by getting his own coffee….WHERE’S NAKED ABBEY?
Crankshaft: “Wait until the ice melts? Too slow. Get me a bag of grenades. NOW soldier.” Thus begins the flashbacks.
FC: “Mommy’s gonna make our favorite drinkies later too. They’re called Nyquill”
Mary Worth: “Hi Drew. It’s so good to see you. Please. Take a seat. This is Chris Hansen….” Oh dear…
Zits: Next time, wait until summer when the girls are sunbathing in their daddies’ driveways. Dumbass.
DtM: Alice. Talk Dirtily To Me.
gnome de blog
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:04 pm [Reply]

Yes, Dr. Kelly came out of the same closetful of polyethylene androids as Gary, Alan, Eric, $cott Gaines, the librarian, Pete the FBI agent, etc., etc. No wonder LuAnn and Margo are desperate to the point of insanity. The only real human-type male in all of New York City is Artistotle Papagoras, and he has a heart condition.

Tommie, on the other hand, prefers robots.
Jamus The Bartender
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:06 pm [Reply]

Herb and Jamaal.: Sounds like Deacon Blues is coming up with Steely Dan’s next big follow-up to “Cousin DuPree”.
CM
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:06 pm [Reply]

Drew thinks “Let’s grab some seats” is an invitation for hanky-panky. That’s why he’s getting ready by unbuttoning his shirt.
Yitzchok
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:08 pm [Reply]

MW: In the first panel, it’s worth noting in the background that George Will is extremely disappointed in his beverage.

In the second panel, I think it’s clear that since Drew is fiddling with a button that was previously unbuttoned, he is buttoning up, not unbuttoning — no doubt preparing to put on his special “thought relishing” tie.
Darkefang
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:10 pm [Reply]

Now that I look at it again, panel one looks like part of a poster from a self-defense class. Cropped out is the bottom half of the poster, where the assaulter is being kneed in the crotch.
Jamus The Bartender
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:13 pm [Reply]

22. From what I remember living in Chicago, they would have given Jeremy the opprotunity to buy ” A twenty dollar pencil, a forty dollar pencil, and a sixty dollar pencil. I think you want the sixty dollar pencil, don’t you?”, a lecture about respect for women, then send him on his way.
UNLESS the perp in question was of the non white persuasion, then…yeah, cuffed to a chair, nightstick, given a newspaper so as not to bleed on the floor, least that’s what Dick Tracy told me..
Rainbird
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:19 pm [Reply]

Loopina 19
What I thought was odd about FC was that there was no furniture in the room, that would be either the dining room or the living room. What has happened to the furniture? Are those the left-overs Thel is cooking?
Alt Comix
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:20 pm [Reply]

Judge Parker Have you noticed that Gloria’s skirt has changed colors twice during the past four days (which is supposed to be one morning in comic-time)? First, I noticed it was gray. Then it changed to green. Today it’s light brown.

That’s really cool! This may be a test to see how astute the interviewee really is.
Gagott68
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:20 pm [Reply]

30. Jamus: Actually, they’re far more egalitarian in their abuse of the public. They’ll now also pound on little, white, female bartenders; young, white stocktraders as well as their usual beat-downs of ethnic minorities.
bats :[
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:21 pm [Reply]

I’ve never really thought about this (other folks here have), but dialog exchange (particularly Bad Dialog) isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Awkward postures help!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/9545446@N07/2212592150/

(18. Nate: Oh, Nate! If it were only true!)
indrifan
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:28 pm [Reply]

Preteena – more squick.

Luann – I think Brad’s fizzy drink is a little too subtle. He and TJ should be on a train just entering a tunnel. Poish!

RMMD – Speaking of not subtle: “We’re still not high enough”? “It’s lit!”? I thought all the alcohol had evaporated.

I don’t usually read Monty for the artwork, but I really like the look on Gretchen’s face in panel 3 today – though it also sums up my feelings about the current storyline. But if I only read comic strips I liked, would I check out this website multiple times a day? I think not.
Atomic Bird
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:29 pm [Reply]

BB is really hitting the Plugger demographics today. You’re a Plugger if you think that the stuff kids listen today is just noise, not real music like you listened to when you were their age.
Calico
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:30 pm [Reply]

I think Drew is reaching for the spare Trojan hidden in his collar. Really, anything could be hidden in that disaster of a suit coat.

Marm – haha, my dog loves pizza too!
She used to try to eat people as well, but is more interested in sleeping these days…and pizza.

#32 It’s a Jack Finney-esque trick – along with the morphing coffee mugs.
YX
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:32 pm [Reply]

I love ya Josh, but Joe Mathlete does the Maraduke’s better.
Pozzo
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:35 pm [Reply]

I think Lu Ann’s question in panel two means, “Is he capable of specificity in his requests? Cuz that’s way beyond me.”
Sarah Marie
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:38 pm [Reply]

Today’s Garfield made me laugh. So did last night’s “Hannah Montana”. Help me.
Pozzo
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:43 pm [Reply]

#9 – Make that “A *malenky* bit of the old ultraviolence.”

I saw that movie when I was in college (not at the time of release — about a decade later) during a semester when I was taking a Russian class. I kept turning to the girl I went with and saying, “Ooh, ‘malenky’; that means ‘little.’ ‘Droog’ — that’s ‘friend.’ ‘Horrorshow’ — ‘good.’”

Is it any wonder I never scored with her?
AhClem
January 22nd, 2008 at 12:52 pm [Reply]

#19 Loopina -
FC reminds me a bit of the classic Far Side cartoon that shows two dogs watching their owner open up a can, and one of them is saying, “Oh boy! Dog food again!”

I will now go and do penance for mentioning FC and Far Side in the same sentence.
Baka Gaijin
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

MW: Vera looks like an unruly golden retriever, greeting her master by jumping up and putting her paws on his shoulders. Am I the only one?
Mibbitmaker
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

MT: The real reason Trail’s being shot at: the shooter has had it with the improper emphasis thing in his strip, and had just snapped. Next, he’ll swoop on down to A3G to do in LuAnn for doing the same furshlugginer thing today.

And also for wearing scrubs without the proper blueish color.

Imagine the copter guy being a vigilante for other violations in strips:

Michael Patterson: gets shot by machine gun until there’s nothing left of him — For the most improbable book deal ever for the worst book ever.

Mary Worth: For decades of unwise meddling. An extra bullet for all the platitudes.

Mallard and Edison Lee: For bringing ideological extremism to its dullest, yet no less aggravating, conclusions.

The cast of FW: The shooter will keep them alive, since living out their unending miseries is its own punishment.

Cathy (the titular comic character): Just because.

Lockhorns: These two he’ll waste in order to reinforce the tradition of marriage. He figures that would do it far more good than harrassing people in loving, same-sex commitments ever would (He may be a vigilante and gun nut, but he’s got some sense of social conscience).

Liz Patterson’s flyboy ex: For giving his fellow chopper pilots a bad name.
Hasty Penguin
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:10 pm [Reply]

What bothers me most about Marmaduke today is the notion of how happy the man’s wife seems to be at the idea of her husband being taken away by various canines to a Pizza joint – and who knows how she understood that.

And where is A3G taking place? The kitchen? The living room? Will the next frame be at the liquor store? It’s a wonder more panels of A3G don’t take place at the liquor store, actually.
Gabe
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:10 pm [Reply]

In prickly city, the joke is about Winslow trying to show his human side and Carmela reminds him he’s a coyote. Kinda funny, and it lets you know the author hasn’t slipped his cracker and FORGOTTEN THAT HIS STRIP HAS ANTHROMORPHIC CHARACTERS.

Meanwhile in Shoe, the Perfesser contemplates getting a bird.
Tili
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:15 pm [Reply]

MW: I was so sure this storyline was going to result in more embarrassment and smackdowns for Drew, based on his smug thought-ballooning. I mean, that kind of stuff is a pretty obvious set-up for an ironic let-down. “I’m SO SURE Vera likes me!” and then it’s all the more delicious when she slaps him, right? Yesterday I had my hopes smashed by that weird nuzzling-sniffing maneuver. I think that’s some way of showing affection in the Worthiverse, right? So a million thanks to Darkefang, comment 29, for giving me a way to rationalize it. I’m sure she was just trying to look for weak pressure points or something.
Sans Sense
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

MT: “WHAT’S GOING ON? Watch out Andy, that one just missed you. I told you not to mess with the Yorkie bitch!”
Joe Blevins
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:24 pm [Reply]

MW: I’m a little disappointed. I wanted Drew’s response to be: “Don’t mind if I do. I think I’ll start with yours, milady.”
Francis
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:24 pm [Reply]

It’s just good to see that Dr. Drew has learned humility from his romantic misadventures.
One-eyed Wolfdog
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:26 pm [Reply]

I’ve got to interpret Drew’s “same here” in panel 1 as “I can see my reflection somewhere behind you, and gosh! You’re right, it is good to see me.”
Allie Cat
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

MW – I just saw Blade Runner for the first time this past week (I know, I know, my education is severely lacking) and I’m more convinced than ever that either Drew or Vera is a Nexus 6 Replicant.

A3G- Ditto LuAnn and Margo.

The good news in both cases is that they only live four years…

FOOB – If they’re going to off Grampa this week, I hope April is there to be with him. It wouldn’t be pleasant for her, but she’s the only one who has shown an ounce of compassion for him, and he deserves better.

Luann – Oh, TJ – you’re not going to force Brad out, he’ll come out when he’s good and ready. Or, never.

Mutts – As the owner of a dog roughly the size and shape of Earl, I have to say, I get that look a lot. I also give that look a lot, at say, 5:45 AM when I have to take my beast out and it’s raining, and the steps are slick, and I almost do a split going down them. And, incidentally, I was never a cheerleader, so a split is not a natural position for me.
Gregoire
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:47 pm [Reply]

#32 Alt Comix – JP

Actually, the new guy is so arousing, she had to change her skirt a few times
One-eyed Wolfdog
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:49 pm [Reply]

Also, it really looks like Drew has an extra hand coming out of his elbow, which is grabbing some ~~seat~~ purse.
Artist formerly known as Ben
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:52 pm [Reply]

#30 Jamus,
Jeremy is doubly lucky that he’s white and that his parents are professionals then. If he gets a savage beating, it will be from Viral’s father.
Rarely-Posts
January 22nd, 2008 at 2:34 pm [Reply]

MW: Has anyone raised the theory yet that Vera is preggers?
That would be so cool to see the wild and crazy (in his own mind) Dr. Drew crap his dockers!
Little Guy
January 22nd, 2008 at 2:44 pm [Reply]

Yester9CL: Nice that someone called Edda out of her genetic misanthropy. Can we have Dave Roberts and Kevin Millar perhaps taking Dr Julli down a few notches?

Baldo: Yay! Resolution without violence! Now let me get to Mark Trail,… er, Gil Thorp…. um, Dick Tracy… um, Lio…. perhaps Galactic Emper… um…. ooooo! Abbey boobiage in Judge Parker!
True Fable
January 22nd, 2008 at 2:52 pm [Reply]

# 56 Rarely-Posts – Ooh even better if Dr. JEFF Corey is the father!

I mean why not? Mary’s not given Jeff any since, well, EVER, and Drew’s been so busy prancing and preening around fantasizing about his harem in front of his mirrors, he wouldn’t have noticed if Dr. Jeff got there before him.

Oh, that would be so fun. Drew would need to dye every pair of pants he has, shit-brown.
Anonymous
January 22nd, 2008 at 2:54 pm [Reply]

I may be several dollars short and a few days late with this but I just noticed that Mark Trail lost his arm from the elbow down in the portage where his motorboat morphed into a canoe. Maybe it got cut off by the prop. “WHY are they shooting at me when they can’t aim?”

http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20080119&name=Mark_Trail
Gagott68
January 22nd, 2008 at 2:55 pm [Reply]

57. Little Guy: Baldo’s resolution without violence? Yawn. But at least we got to have resolution with the threat of swift and blinding violence. YAY!
Bunnë
January 22nd, 2008 at 3:04 pm [Reply]

Breaking News Alert! Fred Thompson drops out of the presidential race. Probably due to today’s scathing portrait of him in Lucky Cow: http://www.gocomics.com/luckycow/2008/01/22/
Paperback Rifler
January 22nd, 2008 at 3:12 pm [Reply]

Pluggers: “A plugger’s only gold chain hangs from his pocket.”
I guess that means that the chains in a plugger’s S&M rumpus room aren’t even gold-plated. Man, those pluggers really are cheap S.O.B.’s.

Garfield: I actually laughed at this today. I really like cats; but a big difference between dogs and cats, in my opinion, is when they lick your face. When a dog licks your face, it seems like the dog is being affectionate. When a cat licks your face, it seems like the cat is trying to determine whether or not you need seasoning.

Crankshaft: “‘Wait till it melts’? ‘Wait till it melts’?! Dammit, woman; that’s exactly what that ice wants us to do! Can’t you see we would be playing right into its icy grip? If we do nothing, then the ice has won! Damn you, ice! Damn you to hell!”

Gasoline Alley: Wait a minute; so the embattled postman is not to set foot on Post Office property or to speak to any postal employee. Yet he is expected to report to his boss’s office, which is most likely on Post Office property; and once he’s in his boss’s office on Post Office property, he’ll have to talk to his boss, who is a postal employee. Wow. Even in the absence of internet-bought meteorites that have been acquired for the purpose of committing hate crimes on young people, this comic strip manages to border on insanity. It’s too bad that this particular storyline isn’t likely to end with Clovia in a swimsuit, though.

Mary Worth: Maybe this storyline is going to go all noir on us. Maybe Vera is scheming to bilk her company via insurance fraud, and she’s going to use her feminine wiles to beguile Dr. Drew because she needs a false medical report to set her plan in motion. Then once she has what she wants, KA-POW! — Vera gives Drew a bullet in the brain, and KA-BLOOEY! — Vera stuffs Drew’s body into his car and pushes the car into Kelrast Chasm, where the car explodes.

(Interactive Part of the Story for Those Curmudgeonistas Who Are So Inclined) When Mary gets to the bottom of what has happened, she raises her hands into the “Jazz Hands of Prosaicism” position, and she says “__________.”

(. . . then again, maybe the Vera / Drew storyline is going to go in a completely dull direction that will be boring and tedious in ways which none of us could have predicted. Yeah, that’s probably what’ll happen.)
bats :[
January 22nd, 2008 at 3:14 pm [Reply]

58. TF: ooooooh, the possibility is too sweet to contemplate! (”It’s all right, son, go ahead and marry her…the baby will still have 25% of your genes. Even if they are shit-brown.”)
Jeffsterr
January 22nd, 2008 at 3:14 pm [Reply]

MW: Have we already discussed Vera’s real possible reasons for wanting to meet Dr. Drew?
1. She’s pregnant.
2. She’s ill and needs Dr. Drew to examine her.
3. She’s blackmailing him.
4. She’s blackmailing him becasue she’s pregnant and ill.
Perky Bird
January 22nd, 2008 at 3:25 pm [Reply]

MW– Reasons Vera wants to meet with Drew:

1. After all the long hours she spent at her job, she has risen in the ranks and now has a job that will send her to Miami. She just wants to see him one more time to say,goodbye.

2. She became despondant after leaving Drew and tried to commit suicide. But a handsome young man on the Suicide Prevention Hotline talked her out of it. They fell in love. She wants to thank Drew for driving her to the brink of destruction, only to be saved by her new True Love.

3. She found a little beagle lying in the road and took him home. She wants Drew to meet little “Lester”, who somehow seems familiar to us…
Les
January 22nd, 2008 at 3:28 pm [Reply]

New DTWOF: http://dykestowatchoutfor.com/dtwof-episode-521

Man, I love those strips. This one is not a plot-advancer, though. More an unsubtle look at the American political system. (Unsubtle because of the woman in the Kucinich T-shirt in panel 1 (and he would be so great if he hadn’t claimed that he would pick Ron Paul as a running mate. gah.))

I envy Bechdel’s uncrushed idealism. After 7+ years of Bush, I wish Gore or Kerry would have won, despite the latter being a total douchebag. After all that, I think electability does matter, but it seems many Dems have looked at Bush and decided that “douchebag” and “electable” are synonyms. How about somebody who doesn’t roll over like Fido?
Poteet
January 22nd, 2008 at 3:38 pm [Reply]

# 12 Skullturf — BWAHAHAHAHA! And you owe me a keyboard.

MW — I could easily be wrong, especially given that this is the Charterstoneiverse. But to me, that cafe looks like a place to deliver bad news in the cold white light of day, not a sultry romantic dimly-lit “let’s get together again.” It would not surprise me if young Dr. Drew is about to become drop-jawed and goggle-eyed with disbelief. “But it’s ME! In this really cool coat! And she’s delivering a final good-bye??!!! IS…NOT…POSSIBLE!”
BigTed
January 22nd, 2008 at 3:53 pm [Reply]

Tommie’s sex life takes a sudden turn toward the kinky when we discover she’s being paged by Dr. R. Kelly.
Weaselboy
January 22nd, 2008 at 3:55 pm [Reply]

MW: My dream scenario for the Drew/Vera meetup: Vera’s last name is really Kelrast, and she refuses to believe that Drew prefers to be left alone. Let’s see how ol’ Drew handles THAT one.
Sirkus Peanuts
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:08 pm [Reply]

Dr. Drew in panel one: “It’s good to see me, too, Vera.”
Jamus The Bartender
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:16 pm [Reply]

33. WONderful. All opressed together.
Emily
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:16 pm [Reply]

See I’m upset because there’s no way this MW storyline can turn out well. If Vera doesn’t want Drew, we’re in for another whole round of her whining about casual polygamy as if it were genocide, and if she does want Drew we’ve just watched more than a week of the most extensive foreshadowing ever.

The idea that there could be some surprising third dramatic option is of course out of the question.
gump worsley
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:29 pm [Reply]

When it comes to this Dr. Drew storyline, I just keep seeing Homer Simpson saying “Nobody talks to me that way. I’m Homer Simpson, the most powerful food critic in town, who will never get his comeuppance! You hear me? No comeuppance!!! (We’ll be right back.)”

And….well, if you’re writing Mary Worth, that’s not a good thing.
commodorejohn
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:29 pm [Reply]

Testing, 1, 2, 3…
commodorejohn
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

Well, due to technical difficulties, yesterday’s snark has been delayed until…today!

A.D. – I’m reasonably sure that’s not how women came about in anyone’s scheme of things.

BB – Beetle Bailey is taking place inside the Monolith from 2001: a space odyssey. Beetle is about to evolve into a star child, and things will get even more insane than they already are.

Blondie – I disregard any sentence that starts with “experts say.”

DTM – Okay, points to the kid here: bukakke is quite menacing. However, I’d rather not have seen it in the funny pages.

FOOB – Ah ha ha ha, the humiliation of men is funny! Keep it up, Lynn! Show those horrible penis-possessors who’s superior!
bats :[
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

68. BigTed: or, Tommie’s sex life takes a sudden turn toward the cantankerous and crotchety when we discover she’s being paged by Dr. D. Kelly.
(”I’m a doctor, Tommie, not an actor! No, wait…I’m an actor, Tommie, not a doctor! No, that’s not right, either…I’m dead, Tommie! Just dead!”)
commodorejohn
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

Hmm, it doesn’t seem to like long comments now. Oh well, multi-parter:

GT – Meanwhile, Milford is losing. Again.

HOTC – I have to agree with everybody who says this is plausible – I used to chew on random objects all the time.

Luann – WE DO NOT CARE ONE WHIT ABOUT THIS STUPID STORYLINE GIVE IT UP ALREADY

MT – So…why are Mark’s eyes flesh-colored?

Marmaduke – Chiming in on the “Bengal tiger” bit.

MW – Cripes, even Gil Thorp can make human interaction look more convincing.

OBH – The stuff this strip gets away with is pretty awesome.
commodorejohn
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:32 pm [Reply]

Aaaaand the finish!

Popeye – All this trouble over a little whore money…

RMMD – Hey, Rex Morgan, M.D.? I see you’re attempting a little symbolism with that single oversized sperm emanating from Niki’s mouth in panel two, but…please don’t ever do that again.

Edison Lee – Hambrock tries his unsubtle best to convince us that fast food is toxic because it has *gasp* chemicals in it…here’s a hint for you, dude: freaking potatoes have arsenic in them. Like, naturally.

Zits – Well, I wasn’t expecting this.
jayjaybear
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:32 pm [Reply]

Has Young Dr. Drew always looked like the unholy lovechild of Arthur Godfrey and Frankie Avalon or is it just me?
Gold-Digging Nanny
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:51 pm [Reply]

64, 65 –
Real reason Vera wants to meet Drew: OxyContin.
Al
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:53 pm [Reply]

FW: I just notice that Crankshaft ISN’T driving the bus. That must be a 1st for a Battiuk-written strip.

Safe Havens — About freaking time — Jeanine’s been telegraphing this revelation for years.
Bootsy
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:55 pm [Reply]

Has Young Dr. Drew always looked like the unholy lovechild of Arthur Godfrey and Frankie Avalon or is it just me?

jayjaybear, you look like that?
jayjaybear
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:58 pm [Reply]

Hey, now! No turning my embarrassingly inept syntax around on me! *sulk*
McManx
January 22nd, 2008 at 5:01 pm [Reply]

MT – Poor Andy looks like he’s been shot in the ass. And if he is like any other dog, he’ll assume the pain originates with the first being he sees — and thus rip Mark’s throat out.
Allie Cat
January 22nd, 2008 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

#80 Nanny — Hell, for a couple of tabs of hydrocodone I’d consider getting nekkid for Dr. Drew Cory -or Dr. Jeff Cory.

What can I say, I’m a sucker for good painkillers. Muscle relaxers too.
ltrftp Hedly
January 22nd, 2008 at 5:06 pm [Reply]

GT has been bugging me all day. Specifically the third panel. I finally figured it out. Andrew Gregory in the third panel looks like a character from a Mad Magazine parody. But not from this space/time continuum! I feel so much better now. I can almost forgive Josh for posting a M*****e cartoon.

Ew. I gotta shower.
ltrftp Hedly
January 22nd, 2008 at 5:09 pm [Reply]

So we/I cannot post links?

This is fun a href=http://againwiththecomics.blogspot.com/2008/01/ask-golden-age-wonder-woman.html> Wonder Woman gives advice to the loveorn

Enjoy
commodorejohn
January 22nd, 2008 at 5:15 pm [Reply]

9CL – I chuckled.

Archie – The ALGJU3K attempts to comprehend “cool.”

DT – Dick is thinking of all the ghostsex he could’ve had if this had been that one stupid Next Generation episode set on Scotsworld or whatever the hell its name was.

FOOB – Actually, it would be easier to see what makes a clock tick if it were turned around, as you could then pry the back off and get a look at its inner workings. Metaphor is one of the many things that’s not your strong suit, Lynn.

FW – I wonder if they sell jackets with only one arm hole?

GA – Wow, this is almost as absurdly overblown as the bit in Luann where Tiffany is totally purged from all records when her title of Miss Chamber of Commerce gets revoked.

H&L – Something strikes me very odd about this one. Ditto is undersized, and the punchline sounds like it has some filthy double meaning I didn’t catch.

JP – Another entry in “possible album titles:” Thanks, Gloria, But I’ll Follow My Nose To The Machine.

Luann – Brad can’t handle the concept of human sexuality.

MT – Gee, Mark, I don’t know. I mean, it’s not like you’re conveying “incriminating” evidence back to the police or anything. No, there’s just no clear motive here. Must be a stray round from a deer hunter.

MW – Ew.

MC – That’s exactly what I’ve always thought about such questionnaires.

PBS – Now that’s some good narration-box summary right there.

Popeye – What next? Will Wimpy go on to found a mooching-themed cult, only to demand that his followers blind themselves?

RMMD – Damn. We were thisclose to having June Morgan, R.N. in the funny pages.

Zits – Jeremy is a stalker? Criminy, he could at least do a George McFly and peep from a tree instead of keeping the engine running all night.
Deena in OR
January 22nd, 2008 at 6:02 pm [Reply]

Pop culture news flash…tragedy.

Heath Ledger was found dead of a suspected overdose this afternoon. Details on CNN.
the guy down the street
January 22nd, 2008 at 6:08 pm [Reply]

does it bother anyone else that in Marmaduke that the old mans head is completely turned around like his neck has been snapped or he’s possessed
neither would surprise me
Amanda
January 22nd, 2008 at 6:27 pm [Reply]

I really want to hope that Vera is pregnant, but that would be an interesting plot twist. Oh well.
Brown-eyed Girl
January 22nd, 2008 at 6:31 pm [Reply]

89. Deena in OR. I just saw the story about Heath Ledger. It is just so sad.
Rusty
January 22nd, 2008 at 6:33 pm [Reply]

MW: Vera has a big-ass check from her wealthy brother burning a hole in her purse, she’s about to leave town. But first she will seduce young Dr. drew and then post a video of their lovemaking on the internets. Fortunately, no one in town has internet access and his lack of prowess and size will be safe for years.
Moss_Moses
January 22nd, 2008 at 6:41 pm [Reply]

The caveman shooting at Mark Trail missed, just as expected, despite having a high powered rifle, scope and an easy shot. It’s a good thing for Mark that criminals in Lost Forest are all stupid, clumsy and all around incompetent. I still don’t understand how he portaged a motor boat with half his right arm missing.
Jamus The Bartender
January 22nd, 2008 at 6:55 pm [Reply]

89, 92. He was playing the Joker in the next movie, unless i’m mistaken. Damn.
Poteet
January 22nd, 2008 at 7:07 pm [Reply]

MW — Maybe Vera wants to convert Drew to Scientology. Maybe she wants to ask his advice about a recent investment offer from Nigeria. Maybe she’s considering plastic surgery to remove her occasional double chin, and needs a recommendation for a good plastic surgeon. All we know for certain is that whatever she wants, it will probably turn out to be maddeningly dull.
L1
January 22nd, 2008 at 7:26 pm [Reply]

Actually, it’s because Dr. Drew sees Clark Kent standing behind Vera and he wants to show off by ripping off his own shirt in a show of superheromanship. Sadly, all that’s on Dr. Drew’s undershirt is a silkscreen of his own beautiful face.
Lord-z
January 22nd, 2008 at 8:20 pm [Reply]

I am starting to like Doctor Drew more and more. The last time we saw him, he was a whiny little tosser. This time, he is one hell of a confident little tosser. I bet that his first throughts upon entering the coffeeshop was “Who ordered hot stud-bucket, cause a large serving is coming up”.
left of the pyle
January 22nd, 2008 at 8:34 pm [Reply]

Gil Thorp 1/23/08: It appears Coach Kaz has developed Bell’s palsy and has to hold the right side of his face to speak clearly. Apparently Rubin and McLaughlin have decided to take on the not so tough subject of a neurological disorder which allows for full to near-full recovery without treatment within 12 months in 9 out of 10 of those afflicted. Next thing you know, Coach Thorp will be burning Marty Moon’s ill-gotten money in order to heat water for the locker room showers.
Benicillin
January 22nd, 2008 at 8:42 pm [Reply]

This “Mary Worth” plot promises to be as chock full of twists and turns as Peter Parker shopping at an Old Navy for seven months while his Spidey sense goes haywire because he forgot to leave his costume at home and can’t try on cargo pants.

Haa haaa I have discovered the “COTW Runner-up secret formula” !!!

The jig is up Josh.
Deborah
January 22nd, 2008 at 8:48 pm [Reply]

RMMD: Oh, Josh! How can you talk about soap opera sex, and not mention “We’re still not high enough”? You know, to enjoy the sordid anal violations that are about to occur once we warm up by burning a pile of money. It’s all sex and drugs and money and sex and more sex and, and, wow, it’s warm in here NOW.
Carly
January 22nd, 2008 at 9:01 pm [Reply]

I think Dr. Drew is preparing to play himself a jaunty congratulatory tune on his air harmonica. Perhaps it will be an entirely unknown bluegrass version of “I’m Too Sexy”.
Eats Shoots And Leaves
January 22nd, 2008 at 9:03 pm [Reply]

Mark Trail and Marmaduke: Clash of the Big Butt Dogs

I’d like to see Andy and Marmaduke go head to head. Marmadork’s never tackled anything bigger than a trailer trash poodle while Andy deals with talking ducks the size of 747s and gargantuan bunnies on a daily basis. Also, while I feel bad for Andy getting shot at, I’d like to Marmaduke get shot, period.
Frank Parsnip
January 22nd, 2008 at 9:13 pm [Reply]

A3G: I think Al Scaduto (bless his soul) would have liked that Tommie’s scrubs are of the more traditional “white” sort, although I think the missing high collar and little white hat with a red cross in the middle would still have been sorely missed. Tommie’s not normally shy about wearing high-collared outfits, but unfortunately something like 90 percent of her work wardrobe seems cut from early Soviet army uniforms. Dr. Zhivago, anyone?
Anythingbutwork
January 22nd, 2008 at 9:26 pm [Reply]

MW: No doubt Drew is sure he’s going to score with Vera, but does he have to signal it to the world with that index-finger-pumping-into-the-curled-other-hand motion out of Beavis and Butthead?

Or is it just that I teach high school and am overly alert to this sort of thing?
commodorejohn
January 22nd, 2008 at 9:35 pm [Reply]

#105 Anythingbutwork – Probably not; I didn’t even go to public school or watch Beavis & Butthead, but even I knew what a gonna-get-some that creepy grin of his was.
Muffaroo
January 22nd, 2008 at 9:46 pm [Reply]

Dang, beat to it by about 100 posts (#5, to be precise): I was going to say he was checking the powder level in his “poison” ring.
Doug Puthoff
January 22nd, 2008 at 10:01 pm [Reply]

1-22

Zits: First Jeremy stalks viral, then he rapes her. Then he sells his soul to Mephisto to make her marry him. Creepy.
wellsey
January 22nd, 2008 at 10:40 pm [Reply]

I can finally say that this blog has wholly corrupted me. I used to innocently love the serials. I’d follow them blindly anywhere they, ever so slowly, chose to lead me. But all I can think now is, Ha! Drew’s talking to himself about his own wang! So, thank you, Comics Curmudgeon, for showing me there was always so much else there if only I chose to look for it!
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:05 pm [Reply]

Doug Puthoff @ 108: Creepy? It was true romance when Luke Spencer did it to Laura in General Hospital.
Joe Btfsplk
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:19 pm [Reply]

Mark Trail – Plot call: Mark will dive into the lake, swim underwater to where the shooter is, rise up in front of him like the Creature From The Black Lagoon, grab the gun away, and administer either the Fist-O-Justice or the Rifle-Butt-To-The-Head-O-Justice.

I suffer no delusions regarding the reliability of my plot calls. Yet I persevere.
Poteet
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:44 pm [Reply]

# 109 wellsey — Well put, and me too. I’ve followed serial strips since I was a wee lass, and I always tried to make the best of their various inanities and insanities. I religiously read every comic in every paper that came my way, and serials were just a strange part of the package. Then I found this site, and wow, Pope Josh — there were bells on the hill, but I never heard them ringing, no I never heard them at all, til there was you.
Poteet
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:50 pm [Reply]

MT — Andy, now is the time to swim away from the boat. Swim, Andy, swim! They want to kill Mark, not you, and bizarre though you are, I like you. Besides, you’ve been nothing but loyal to Mark in the past, while he stupidly let you get drugged recently. I say you’ve earned the right to let him ask dumb questions and sit there being shot at by himself.
Poteet
January 22nd, 2008 at 11:54 pm [Reply]

# 113 — Hmm, I made it sound as if Mark is shooting at himself. That would be a lot more interesting, and given that it’s MT, he still wouldn’t actually get hit.
Dollface
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:05 am [Reply]

That Boy Meets Girl song was released in 1989. So I guess that Drew and Vera spent an inordinate amount of time watching VH1 together.
Anna Nimity
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:13 am [Reply]

Zits: Jeremy is stalking Viral? FINALLY this strip is starting to get interesting!
Frank Parsnip
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:16 am [Reply]

MW: Drew has obviously spent way too much time hearing his dad’s stories of the wild girlie bar scene in the back alleys of Saigon and Manila and is projecting that onto Vera. By the time they get to their booth, Drew is going to be at least partly disrobed; if all goes well, then he’ll pay the madam the short-time bar-fine Vera and take her back to a fleabag hotel around the corner for an hour of boom-boom. Of course just because this is in his mind doesn’t mean it matches reality — honestly, if Drew actually spoke half his thought-balloons, he’d get slapped a whole lot more than even Dawn could manage.
Yahtzee
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:26 am [Reply]

AG3 — I don’t know if it’s sadder that Lu Ann is drinking OJ straight from the carton or that she’s got the carton turned around and is trying to drink from the wrong side.

This is what happens when you (for values of “you” that mean the ghosts of unknown famous painters) deprive the brain of oxygen.
bats :[
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:29 am [Reply]

Alas! Not much to snark in the Hump Day funnies, other than to continue to be one booth over and watch Drew continue to make an ass of himself:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/9545446@N07/2213165977/
Moon Mullins
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:52 am [Reply]

Josh, still cannot link via the a href method, brings on a blank screen.

Thus, a typed link:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/style/comics/king.htm?name=Dennis_The_Menace

Dennis the Menace’s current artist gives a shout-out in support of legislation to normalize internet partnership with Honduras — the Honduran-Americal Virtual Trade Agreement, HAVTA.
One Bad MotherHubbard
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:54 am [Reply]

#24 Jamus — Niciliy done.
Tats
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:58 am [Reply]

A3-G: “Tommie, why are you wearing scrubs?!” “Thi… this is just my outfit.”

Archie: Huh. So I guess I missed the comic where Archie had the stroke, then.

FW: Ah, Funky Winkerbean, where the minorities ride at the front of the bus. As opposed to in Mary Worth, where the minorities are instructed to take a separate bus altogether so as not to ruin the shot, not that Mary would ever be bourgeois enough to ride the bus.

H&J: I can’t put my finger on it, but I feel like this comic is some sort of euphemism for homosexuality. Then again, isn’t Herb & Jamaal always some sort of euphemism for homosexuality?

JP: The beautiful thing about Judge Parker is that I’ve tuned into the strip maybe a dozen times in the past few months and I’m pretty sure I’ve never seen the same character twice.

MT: “What’s going on? Why would anyone be shooting at us?!” Perhaps Mark should think back to all of the people he’s punched in the face.

MW: If I were Dr. Drew, I wouldn’t be so excited at the prospect of sex in the Worthiverse. I imagine it to be dull, imbued with a vague sense of morality, implacably self-righteous, and lasting six or seven months. It usually ends with a cigarette, a dull pleasantry (two if it’s a Sunday strip), and a new storyline about Mary’s illiterate niece moving into the condo.

Don’t expect these star-crossed lovers to make good on Dr. Drew’s coital urges, however, because after years of codependency, no one in this strip would dare unzip their flies without asking Mary effing Worth what she thinks of the idea first.

S-M: Ah, Spider-Man, where the only thing bigger than M.J.’s star power is her gigantic face.
True Fable
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:59 am [Reply]

#119 bats :[ – I once referred to Mary Worth as the home of Dr. Drew, Manwhore, and I thought my co-workers were going to swallow their dentures! Now they ALL read the AJC just so they can keep up with what The Manwhore might be doing. And some folks say I don’t contribute to intellectual growth here in Greater Metropolitan Roopville!

Well, I don’t, but still. I do what I can.
Bobdog
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:09 am [Reply]

A3G – Both panels provide further evidence that Tommie is a robot. Note how she appends her roommate’s name to the end of her sentence — given LuAnn’s surprise to see Tommie, it’s not suprsing she starts her sentence with her roommate’s name. But Tommie’s reply is stiff and wooden — as if she was merely following some pre-programmed behavior:

... if(conversation.isNew()){ reply.append(", " + conversant.getName()); conversation.setNew(false); } reply.append("."); System.out.println(reply); return;

As for panel two — well, come on, are going to tell me that is not a frick’n robot?
Moon Mullins
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:10 am [Reply]

122 Tats:

I do believe you may be wrong about no repeating characters in Judge Parker. According to my research, Sam’s secretary Gloria:

http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20080118&name=Judge_Parker

is also secretly his daughter Neddy:

http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20070120&name=Judge_Parker
Moon Mullins
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:12 am [Reply]

125: Note also the panels of Gloria and Neddy are almost exactly one year apart.

Coincidence? I think not.
Poteet
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:24 am [Reply]

MW — I think that song positively screams for more lyrics. Here’s my verse…

Trying to catch your heart is like trying to catch a star,
Or trying to score some real good weed, or trying to shoot par,
Your heart is so elusive, like a fleeing butterfly,
I’ll try to swoop my net real fast when it goes flapping by.
ChattyGenes
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:28 am [Reply]

#127 Poteet. Oh, God, thanks for the laugh!!:-):-) That’s priceless! Especially the last line!
FE
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:29 am [Reply]

SCADUTO: You know that old Don Wright cartoon of Disney characters mourning Walt’s death? Could one of us with artistic talent do a similar tribute using some of Al’s characters? The caption would have to be: “They’ll never do it again.”
Bobdog
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:29 am [Reply]

Personally, I’m glad to see Dr. Drew is back to his old-self — that cocksure fellow that though there would be no problem with dating two women in the same apartment complex (where May Worth lives) would be no problem — and both take them horse riding at the same stables, when one of them loves horse riding.

That whole fawning over Mary and his father’s relationship — “that’s what true love looks like” persona was only a temporary manifestation — he was probably just dazed from Dawn slapping him silly.

But, were we to assume all this build up of Drew’s expectations over what the past week or so, we know we’d headed for a fall. Or should be, but then again this is Mary Worth.

Anyway, as I was saying, it’s good to see Dr. Drew got his groove back.
Tats
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:30 am [Reply]

126, Moon Mullins: all that tells me is that Judge Parker went one more year without being cancelled, and I just find that depressing.

Your theory is not without merit though; it could be a cloning thing, like how Margo had all of the men in Apartment 3-G tailored to her specifications: physically identical eunuchs.

Anyways, since the January 23 comics seem to have just been posted…

A3-G: Fact: the reason Lu Ann feels so lousy is because that hospital room has been filled with carbon monoxide. The writers knew the repeated storyline wouldn’t be an issue, because no one actually reads Apartment 3-G.

DtM: Mr. Wilson does need to worry about parting his hand, though, what with his thumb on the back like that.

FOOB: Well, then, seeing as he’s physically incapable of doing it himself, perhaps one of you should fill his fucking cup.

MW: I like that Vera’s overcoat is the exact same colour as her blazer. She’s like a little Russian matryoshka doll filled with identical, increasingly smaller copies. Except when you get to the middle, you kill yourself.

S-M: Go get him, Spidey! Bludgeon him with the giant pineapple you keep on your Tetris-shaped coffee table!

TDIET: I take it, judging by his purchases, that Biff Biceps intends on making peanut butter and Kleenex sandwiches.
ChattyGenes
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:38 am [Reply]

#127 Poteet.

Okay, here’s mine:

Trying to catch your heart is like trying to catch a star,
Or trying to go too far,
Or opening a jam jar,
Or avoiding sticky tar,
Or going to a bar,
Or laughing har har har!

(stupid additions welcome!)
Brown-eyed Girl
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:43 am [Reply]

Wednesday comics:

FOOB. Ok, what CAN Jim do that is as rewarding as the things he’s lost? Damn you Lynn for once again using this man’s suffering as limp segue to a stupid pun.

MW. Yesterday Vera was so glad to see Drew she kissed him. Today she seems miserable. I can see Drew having that effect on people, but I still think she’s just a psycho, and that yesterday’s “kiss” was really a lunge at this throat.
Bobdog
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:44 am [Reply]

#127 – here is my verse:

Trying to catch your heart is like jumping for the moon
Really, honey, all I want to do is spoon
And while I leap to catch yours, my heart feels as if it’s falling
I’ve felt so depressed, I haven’t showered — that’s why I smell so apalling
ChattyGenes
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:46 am [Reply]

#134 Bobdog. Bwahahaha!
Tats
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:47 am [Reply]

Song lyric mania:

Trying to catch your heart
Is like trying to catch a star,
And when we are apart
I want to get into my car,
To drink away my woes
And to drive right off a cliff;
But I know you’d run a-fro
Like a Vietnam-bound Jeff.

Like that bitty, Ella Byrd,
you know all that’s yet to come.
You’re as pretty as that blonde girl,
Chinbeard’s wife (but not as dumb).
And so I write our song,
To console me as we part,
I got drunk and broke your swans
You got mad and broke my heart.

Love, Dr. Drew.

As I write, it occurs to me that there’s a real market out there for Mary Worth-themed valentine cards. I might whip some up if I acquire a significant other by Valentine’s Day.
Starrynight
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:52 am [Reply]

#124 Bobdog
#127 Poteet
Both of your posts are hilarious! I think you should be co-COTW…
Bobdog
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:58 am [Reply]

#127 or the Bob Dylan version:

Trying to catch your heart
is like trying to catch a star
Maggie comes in fleetfoot play’n her big guitar
Quot’n Shakespeare and smok’n cheap cigars
Look’n like she just fell off the baggage car
of a freight train named after FDR
I would make it without you honey,
if I didn’t have to try so hard
Frank Parsnip
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:01 am [Reply]

A3G: Tommie very smartly arranged to have Dr. Kelly call up halfway through her date with Gary. If the date was going in the crapper, then she was to use the call as an excuse to run off to the hospital. Lu Ann obviously wishes she had the foresight to arrange for a friend to call with an “urgent art project” halfway through her evening with Alan.

Jugs Parker: Poor Steve’s got to be interviewed by Sam Driver wearing blackface? And this is the firm he wants to work at?

Sex Organ, M.D.: Today we will feature David Schwimmer in the role of Rex Morgan, M.D.

Eventually, after whining their way through the burning of the Franklins to get warm, someone will wake up to the fact that they are in a wooden building full of wooden things in the middle of a forest. Or perhaps Rex will finally remember that skin-on-skin contact is the boy scout’s way for surviving hypothermia.

GT: Fresh from his previous career as the “thistledown haired gentleman” from Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell, Coach Kaz is not going to take any crap from the A-train. Get ready for “faerie magic” sufficient to fill a basketball with Andrew’s tears.

Funky Pantysniffer: She shouldn’t worry so much about the band relaxing before the show. After all, the band director has a very disarming appearance — some might say she’s relatively ‘armless. Whooo….. Ok. Time to smirk.

MT: Interesting boat he’s got. The canoe front just screams: “Heap big lake fun!” while the rowboat back shouts: “Put your back into it, Mistah Christian!” The little motor probably quietly says “Evinrude’s latest 1953 2Hp Model” in a little sun-faded sticker.

Pluggers: “Pluggers can’t tell the difference between nighttime cold remedies and the crappy sweet wine they like.”
Starrynight
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:05 am [Reply]

Well, I’m up too late anyway, so what the heck? Here’s my version of Drew and Vera’s love song:

Trying to catch your heart
Is like trying to catch a star.
Regardless of the stud I am,
I cannot get that far.
Perhaps my manly qualities,
My fashion sense and hair,
Are really just too much for you,
When ladies stop and stare.
But while we’re at the Junction Road
(Café, that is, my sweet),
Let’s pretend we just hooked up
And get a bite to eat!
Ed Power, writer of My Cage
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:06 am [Reply]

Hey all,

Haven’t posted in awhile.

Thanks to the people who wrote their papers after my last post.

For the people who liked the background ‘gym gags’ the other week…that was all Mel. She is scary talented!

And yes, Mel’s comic-book work is AWESOME! (I forget who posted about it…sorry). If you get a chance to read her ‘Sokora Refugees’ graphic novels form Tokyopop, do it. They are a great balance of fun-adventure, and ass-kicking action!

TRIVIA TIME: Melissa and her friends did the animation for ‘Super Troopers’ while still students at NY’s School of Visual Arts.

For more information on Melissa DeJesus, go to your local library (….or, y’know, just google her…or read this month’s Editor and Publisher article about 20-something syndicated cartoonists…)

Remember kids, Reading Is Fundamental!
True Fable
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:07 am [Reply]

A3G Tommie’s hair is poofy in panel one, but is painted on her skull as usual in panels two and three! Oh, wait… this isn’t Bob Weber’s Spot the Differences, is it? Well, it’d be more interesting if it was.
BB The General is modeling one of those newly developed Anti-Spider Sense masks.
Cathy (Must Die) Oh come on, this chick should just go out and buy a new sweatsuit every month, if she’s got to buy something new and expect to actually wear it. Ha, Ha. Kill.
C’haft You gotta marry those single hairdryers together.
(WT)DT I don’t know which fascinates/repulses me more: Tess’s teeny tiny hands in panel one or Dick’s big flat paper thin ones in panel two. Maybe it’s just the fact that Liz apparently has no real life any more, she’s always at the station house calling Dick to come in to work.
FBoFW Downer Biddy racks up another point on her I’m Married To A Shell meter. Tomorrow I’m sort of expecting her to complain that she never liked vegetables anyway. And hey, IRIS is the one who’s using terms like ’slow’ about JIM?!?
FW I’m really getting tired of that pinned-up sleeve too. It’s a short sleeved shirt; WHY does it need to be pinned?
GA Good point that addressed a question from a snarker yesterday.
It’s still a dumb story, but at least they KNOW it’s a dumb story.
(DT)GT AND he’s a song and dance man.
JP Steve Shannon heard through the legal grapevine that if you want to get paid to sit around and do absofuckinlutely nothing, then Dewey Cheatem & Howe is the perfect place to work. Yep, that Sam Driver’s got it made, and you can probably do his horny wife and secretary with a minimum of effort too.
MT You really have to love a sniper who only fires off ONE round per attempt. Nothing like a sportsman to make the chase interesting and fair!
MW At first I thought that groovy hepcat Dr Drew Manwhore was snapping his fingers to the beat, but then I remembered: there’s not a rhythmic bone in his entire body.
Phantom Kay, what’s your backup plan in case you don’t meet the Jungle Patrol requirements, whatever the hell they are?
Plugger Truman Fable is a Plugger today. Lissen, I think anything OTHER than salt & pepper in the center of the kitchen table is just a fru-fru waiting to get pitched in the round file. And as for medicines there too – what, you mean people DON’T keep their best ’scripts available? Well, that’s just bad hosting.
Preteena Hubba hubba. PreDaddy’s just asking for an ass-kicking.
RMMD Suppose it doesn’t stop raining until after daylight? Then you’ll be soaked, stumbling around in the dark AND no better off than you were when you got there. Face it, Rex: you should have left your fishing equipment in mothballs and just taken the kid to a Hawks game.
SFx FISH SKELETON! Bob Weber Jr. delivers.
S-M That’s no guarantee; Peter is just telling her what’s on television. It was only a matter of time before he picked up a remote.
Zits Of course. Blame the parent because the kid is a little shit. Try keeping the keys and putting a damn Lo-Jac on the car, Walt. Just because he WANTS to drive doesn’t mean he should GET to drive. *grumble*
ChattyGenes
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:10 am [Reply]

127 Poteet, and etcetera….Okay, Mudgies, this is FUN! All attempts have made me laugh!

I’ll have you know that I’m over here in Japan, grading some very boring papers and keeping the cursor on the “refresh” button. You have all brightened my (rather rainy) day, and it’s far from over, so please do your worst! Thanks!
Mibbitmaker
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:22 am [Reply]

I just got my Wednesday paper, and there, in MG&G’s space, under “Mother Goose & Grimm by Mike Peters”, is, of course……….My Cage???

Ed Power! You found me!

Can Ces and Paws, Inc. be far behind?

(and where are those musical stings coming from?)
Brown-eyed Girl
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:28 am [Reply]

Ooh! I love the songs! My unworthy effort:

Trying to catch your heart
Is like trying to catch a star
Or trying to hold a fart
In a great big mason jar.
And when I think about you
I know that near or far
That I might even want to
Is just bizarre.
Bobdog
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:32 am [Reply]

Trying to catch your heart
is just like trying to catch your liver
the anticipation of holding your internal organs
just makes me shake and quiver
Ever since I sliced you open
They’ve been spilling out
While you writhe in pain
My lovely, blond, gutted trout
TB Tabby
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:35 am [Reply]

144 Mibbitmaker:

WHEW! That’s a relief. I got Mother Goose & Grimm in My Cage’s place, and I thought it’d been removed. It just got mixed up.
Mibbitmaker
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:52 am [Reply]

Vera’s song to Drew
(A parody of no actual song at all)

Trying to catch you heart
is like trying to catch a star
It looks tiny at the start
But gets larger than a car
Until it’s big as A-Train’s ego
And burning in your hand
Till you wish that the pain will go
It’s all that you can stand
So, really, it’s a bother
And not mary worth the time
Like being the lame father
Of this really stupid rhyme!
OtherOpus
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:53 am [Reply]

MW: Panel 2 yesterday and panel 1 today represent the point at which Vera, entering the coffee shop and finding that her smirking ex has knit her favourite book of crosswords in to a natty sportscoat, flies in to a rage and attempts to wrench it from his shoulders. By panel 2 today she has found it sturdier than she had expected and is glancing around for a can opener. All this, of course, while the two of them keep up a mundane patter for the good citizens of the Unction Road Ca, who are forced to share only one male and one female haircut between the eight of them in order to afford their gravity-resistant lattes and day-glo orange pastry.

Also, I appreciate the impressionist close-up of Abraham Lincoln’s jaw that Marmaduke appetizer #15 has framed on the wall behind his chair. That kind of investment will only increase in value.
Ed Power, writer of My Cage
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:58 am [Reply]

Mibbitmaker:
“I just got my Wednesday paper, and there, in MG&G’s space, under “Mother Goose & Grimm by Mike Peters”, is, of course……….My Cage???

Ed Power! You found me!”

TB Tabby:
“WHEW! That’s a relief. I got Mother Goose & Grimm in My Cage’s place, and I thought it’d been removed. It just got mixed up.”

Holy F**kbucket! I noticed that had happened on ‘Daily Ink’, but is it happneing in papers too?!?!?!

Wow.

On the upside ‘My Cage’ is in about 40 papers, while MG&G is in over 500, I believe.

Is it really switched in the actual printed papers? Let me know.
Mr. O'Malley
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:14 am [Reply]

Is that TDIET one of ours? It is very reminiscent of Mary Worth from a while back.

PBS: True, but leaves out the real reason why female lions put up with male lions. The females are not large enough to prevent hyenas from stealing their kill, but a male is. Hyenas live in matriarchal clans under a dominant female, by the way. The spotted hyena in particular has a very wild sex life. You know where to find out more. If Pastis wanted to do an X-rated strip he could bring in some hyenas. (Please don’t tell Tinsley or we would be in for some very tedious reading.)
Mibbitmaker
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:18 am [Reply]

#147 (Tabby): Huh. Must be a syndicate-wide mistake.
….. or a really, really good promotion stunt. :o)

N-S: Wiley loathes Dubya, part 3,465,676,546,678,887.

Adam: No, it’s not “brake drums”![/heavy sarcasm] Adam, you just got your radio stuck on a rap station.

GT: Okay, team, coaches… you now have official permission to beat Spit-Curl into submission.

G-F: See, everyone in humor strip land? If you’re going to contrive a pun, THIS is how you do it!

BBlues: You and president Bush, kiddo.

Fred Basset: Either that, or instead of England, you guys live in Italy.

Dilbert: I have the feeling that Ratbert is going to be erased!
Mibbitmaker
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:31 am [Reply]

#150: It sure is in mine. Actual and printed.

I wonder what happened in any papers that carry both strips…?
Ed Power, writer of My Cage
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:40 am [Reply]

D@mn it! I just checked my local paper and they ran the correct strip (i.e. MG&G). I was hoping to see the strip in print.

Mel’s from NY and I’m from NJ and the strip doesn’t run in any of our local papers. :(
Mr. O'Malley
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:43 am [Reply]

Do I have anything better to do besides work?

Trying to catch your heart
Is like trying to catch a star
The way they caught Britney
When she got out of a car
I keep hearing Snuffy Smith
Holler out “Looky thar!”

I would rather be one
Of those drooling paparazzi
Focusing my camera
On places that are nasty
Than be like Rex Morgan
And practise pederasty.
True Fable
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:48 am [Reply]

# 125 Moon Mullins – Now I miss Paris and SuperCedric and the adventures of Young Miss in French Punk Land, all over again.

# 133 Brown-Eyed Girl – Oh, Jim Richards can do all sorts of nifty things, but most important to her is that he can give Iris the ability to trump Elly’s “poor put-upon me” card. Not only that, but he makes a damn fine hat rack.
Frank Parsnip
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:57 am [Reply]

Trying to catch your heart is like trying to catch a star,
Like grasping onto a fart, when you’re slipping from the bar.

Let’s you and me get together, I’d like you to be my wife
And side by side, we’ll skid right down the cheese grater of life.

I’ve brought you a diamond ring that should fit just through your nose,
And, please dear, can you help me slip on this pair of new fishnet hose?

So dear Vera, when we lay down on that mattress over yon,
Please don’t shout his name even if you’re thinking of brother Von
Niall
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:19 am [Reply]

If I wasn’t sleep-deprived, I’d tear into many comics…

However, I’ll only say this about the My Cage online-only (drat) syndication kerfuffle: is THAT what Mother Goose and Grim looks like now?? *checks back previous entries* Okay, I hadn’t seen either of those characters. Egads buyt they’re ugly. I thought there was some sort of hidden gag, but I don’t think Melissa De Jesus could drawn this badly even if she applied herself…

Online views are fewer than print views, but hey, who knows, their (hopefully short-lived) mixup could garner you new readers tranlsating into new print markets!
Niall
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:42 am [Reply]

…and yes, Ashley, you’re beautiful, but that doesn’t mean guys will throw themselves at your feet. Or are you flirting with him? *grin*

Um, any Chicago mudgeons around? Is the weather that bad right now, or is it just O’Hare still coping with the backlog of problems from Monday making flights go haywire? ..or is it just United’s problem? (winter travel dread creeping up…)
ChattyGenes
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:43 am [Reply]

my #143, Re: “Trying to catch your heart”, all contributers: I’m still here; the papers are still boring, and I’m still laughing at your songs/poems. Thanks, all!
Mary Sue MacGuffin
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:49 am [Reply]

#115 Dollface – It seems more likely that time moves so very slowly in Mary Worthiverse, the action is actually taking place in 1989. Just wait till Mary finds out that Milli Vanilli don’t sing their own songs!
gleeb
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:19 am [Reply]

Dick: The chief’s head is growing uncontrollably! Who will Tracy have to kill?

GA: I know it’s te Post Office, but they have heard of telephones, right?

Phantom: “But, Kay! The lunch rush…”
“‘Kay’ was my diner name. Now I’m the Waitress-without-a-name!”

Pluggers: They’re tranquilizers, to keep him from doing what a dog would usually do to a chicken.

Snuffy Smith: “Ha! No one round here is going to Heaven after what we did to that city slicker Google all them years ago.”
Moss_Moses
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:06 am [Reply]

“So many people love you baby
That must be what you are”

That uber sappy pop shlop song is obviously about heartthrob Doc Drew but Vera must be preparing to tell him she’s relocating. Other plausible explanations include telling him she:

1. is knocked up
2. has the clap
3. needs oxycontin
4. has met someone new

all seem possible, but unlikely.

What do you call a boat with a canoe head and motorboat tail that can be portaged like a regular canoe?
man behind the curtain
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:36 am [Reply]

MW — So they’re playing their song. From the website: *)’s one-hit wonders

http://www.mrsgiggles.com/music/compilation_80s.html

And then it’s on to even more embarrassing cheese with Boy Meets Girl’s Waiting For A Star To Fall. “Trying to catch your heart is like trying to catch a star!” Dang, if this is how good it feels to enjoy music that is embarrassingly uncool today, I’ve better live the rest of my life in shame.
GotFuzzy
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:13 am [Reply]

Niall, far north suburban Chicago mudge here. The weather is cloudy and bone-chilling cold. There is snow on the way this morning, so as they say, call your airline before heading out to the airport if you are traveling today. And bring yer woolies–it’s only going to get colder.

I guess I should take a break from the weather and read the Margo-ing comics.
Inspector Dim
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:16 am [Reply]

MT: This is the least exciting murder attempt ever–so much so that Mark has to narrate to his dog what he’s doing at any given moment, so we don’t think he’s just farting around on the lake.
Whippersnapper
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:23 am [Reply]

FW: Oh Becky. This is Funky Winkerbean- nothing is ever great. It’s usually not even fine. You’ll be lucky if you get those kids off the stage before one of their instruments spontaneously combusts, killing a third of the band and horribly maiming the rest.
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:29 am [Reply]

I don’t have much time for snark, but I have time for this:

Archie: Good thing he wasn’t daydreaming of Betty, or he’d have gotten a D+.

Doonesbury: Trudeau is about to show Johnston how an aphasia storyline should be done. If all goes according to the comics page disability diffusion schedule, in about a year and a half, an aphasic character will appear in Funky Winkerbean, then in twwo more years, Sam Driver will hire an aphasic lawyer for his firm. THAT ought to be fun!

MW: Trying to catch your heart
Is like trying to catch a star
Which when it comes to metaphor
Is stretching rather far
What kind of net could ever catch
A shining ball of gas?
No, all I really want to do
Is tap that sweet, sweet ass.
tripledolemite
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:34 am [Reply]

Take away all of the speech balloons and text boxes and today’s Apartment 3-G is maybe the single best comic ever.
firegoat
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:12 am [Reply]

I have a small one person law office. I’ve been contemplating hiring a receptionist/secretary. Are midriff baring-tops ala Olivia Newton John in “Grease” the new “in” for legal professionals?
dimestore lipstick
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:19 am [Reply]

GotFuzzy
How far north suburban? Cause I work in Lake Forest, and live just over the Wisconsin line.
Bootsy
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:27 am [Reply]

For ChattyGenes:

Trying to catch your heart is like trying to catch a star
Or getting your shirts tailored when your arm is in a jar…
Or trying to carry a boat on your head when the water is so far…
Or trying to tell the men apart in a New York city bar…
AtomicDog
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:33 am [Reply]

Zits – Since when is stalking a traffic offense?

TDIET – Proof that Scadulto lived in the fifties – the Edsel in the bottom panel.
Tweeks_Coffee
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:36 am [Reply]

Zits, re #173 – AtomicDog: I was about to say the same thing, then I realized that Jeremy was driving without a valid license. So that’s what he has to appear in court for.

A3G: Why does Tommie look so repulsed in the 3rd panel? Is she afraid Luann is about to vomit? Or is she just just now realizing that this is the person she’s been living with all these years?
Archie: Veronica’s slightly bored look in panel 2 is actually kind of neat. Unfortunately it’s quickly offset by the horror of Betty’s lips and boobs in panel 3. Seriously, girl, lay off the plastic surgery. I mean, your tits are pointing up now.
Crock: I… I actually snickered. *sob*
DT: “Now quit fumbling with that mug and get your tiny, tiny hands over here.” Seriously, the hands in this strip never fail to disturb and fascinate me.
H&J: So Jamaal owned that exact same location over 20 years ago? Cripes, might be time for a change, fella.
MT: Uh…how’re you planning to figure stuff out if you’re in hiding?
MW: To be fair, it is rather unusual for them to play this song at what appears to be a prison cafeteria.
Phantom: My, my, mighty bold of Kay there to just up and quit like that. I can feel it now, this strip is going to descend into a Lucy-esque series of events.
TDIET: Alf’s groceries, eh? Good to see the li’l guy got some work after his series ended abruptly.
Starrynight
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:40 am [Reply]

#170 firegoat- Unfortunately, those kinds of tops are apparently considered “in” career wear for a large number of the 25-and-under female crowd (apologies to any CC’s who may be in that same demographic and do not agree with this statement). My sister sees it all the time at her company…
Ranger
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:49 am [Reply]

MW: Looks to me like Drew the younger is breaking the fourth wall and doing the ol’ finger through the hole sign to us. We get it Drew, we get it, but did you have to use the term ‘relish’?
GotFuzzy
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:04 am [Reply]

dimestore lipstick, I think we’re neighbors! I live on the Illinois side of Cheddar Curtain. We should have a meetup anywhere except the retail hell that is Gurnee. Once the spring thaw sets in, of course.
Perky Bird
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:05 am [Reply]

#170, 175–

Sadly, that’s actually what stores are selling as “career wear”. Really, I see little numbers like that outfit in the career-wear sections of department stores all the time. Makes it rather hard for a…uhm..”mature” thirty-something woman like me to find clothing that is both appropriate for work and doesn’t make one look like an exploding sausage.

My husband and I call it “Hilda-Wear”, after Ugly Betty’s sister Hilda, who always wears tight clothing that reveals loads of cleavage.
AMSTERDANG
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:10 am [Reply]

A3G: Is it just me or does Tommie look and sound like a robot in every single frame of this strip? I think it is the dead, soulless eyes. I imagine her with an awkward robot voice: “Dr. Kelly-requested-me-specific-ally. Beep. Beep.” When (not if, but when) some brave hero in the strip finally bitch-slaps her, I bet her face plate falls off to reveal some whirring hardware underneath.
Artist formerly known as Ben
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:11 am [Reply]

1/23 (The crew is called BDP)

DtM: Scenes like this make me wonder if Dennis actually exists anywhere but in Mr Wilson’s tortured mind.

JP: Take notes. This is some prime job interview bullshit.

Lockhorns: Let it go, Loretta. He’ll soon say something worse in real life.

Luann: Brad and TJ have to stop watching “Back to the Future” together.

SSmith: Parson: “Well then, looks like your SOL, old man.”

Preteena: That’s a cunning cover story dad came up with while calling the escort agency.

Momma: Again with the reverse oedipal schtick? Trust me, Mrs Hobbs, you can do better.

SFx: I like the look of panic on the crab’s face. Seems it read the answer to #4. I wouldn’t be too comfortable if I were that sea turtle either.

PBS: Not an idle threat.

GT: With all these thought balloons that make him look like an ass, it’s only a matter of time before Andrew Gregory moves to Charterstone.

A3G: Lu Ann wishes she were more like Tommie? What do you call that? Doormat envy?

MW: So Boy Meets Girl’s beloved MOR classic “Waiting for the Stars to Fall” is their song? For snarkers, Drew and Vera are the gift that keeps on giving.
smacky
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:28 am [Reply]

MW: All those extra stanzas are great. When “your song” is a piece of crap 1988 one-hit wonder from a band called Boy Meets Girl, you are DOOMED.

Where did they first hear it, the grocery store sound system?

God, if it was playing at the Charterstone pool party, that is such a great starting point for Charterstone Pool Party: 2008 Dr. Drew McLovin’ Mix. I’ve gotta start gathering tunes…
Calico
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:30 am [Reply]

#114 – I’m waiting for the day when Mark punches himself, accidentally or not.
He will, however, have to grow a beard first.
Calico
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:31 am [Reply]

#180 Re: DtM – Read Truman Capote’s short story “Miriam.” Bwahahahaaaaaaaa.
Artist formerly known as Ben
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:34 am [Reply]

(Please don’t tell Tinsley or we would be in for some very tedious reading.)

Agreed. I have no desire to see Hyena Rodham Clinton, and that’s probably the way he’d go.
gkl
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:37 am [Reply]

GA: I called it, bitches! Boo-yeah!

GT: Wait, you mean boasting and acting like an arrogant twerp can annoy people? I’d like to retract my comment on Gasoline Alley. Of course, every comment retracted from Gasoline Alley is one step closer to nonexistence, but I guess we’ll have to take that chance.

But hey, Kaz, nice Botox.

And also, you really shouldn’t have your players practice in sweater-vests. Unless you’re trying to make them look like Mack from Night Court.

Pluggers: Former neighbor? Did she move to get away from the Chief Plugger, or did the Chief Plugger kill her and grind her up for Plugger Kitty Litter?

MT: I’m delighted that in panel 2 Andy has apparently learned to fly. You wouldn’t want a dog to have to get wet by fleeing snipers by swimming, would you?
Calico
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:38 am [Reply]

#163 – Or, is she, ew, moving back to that dusty old mansion, where Von sits in the dark in cheap suits and drinks all day?
Inspector Dim
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:42 am [Reply]

S-M: Look at that grin on Peter’s face in the first panel. Turning on the TV is like Christmas, sex and crack all rolled up into one for him.

As for what it’s time for, the answer is obviously “more TV.”
gagott68
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:48 am [Reply]

142 True Fable: Of course, you blame the parents for the kid being a shit. Who else do you blame? Hollywood? Video games?

See Back to the Future: “He’s an idiot…it comes from upbringing. His parents are probably idiots too.”

That said, Walt Duncan is one of the better portrayed fathers in comicdom so I’m hopeful that he’ll lay down the law.
Bobdog
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:53 am [Reply]

Trying to catch your heart
is like grabbing a comet by its tail
Even if I don’t asphyxiate
I know I’m bound to fail
And what pray tell would I do
with such a cold and icy rock,
When what I need is cold hard cash
to get my wardrobe out of hock?
Moon Mullins
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:02 am [Reply]

Got Fuzzy, Dimestore Lipstick:

Once again, mudge worlds collide! I was born and raised in Lake Forest, though I haven’t lived there since 1986 and my parents finally moved away in 2001, so there’s no “there” there anymore. Still do have two sisters in Barrington though.
AhClem
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:12 am [Reply]

Okay, I’ll give it a shot:

Trying to catch your heart is like trying to catch a star,
Like trying to order shooters from beneath the “Bum Boat” bar.
Where Mary spews out platitudes like a frat boy puking beer,
And Dr. Jeff wishes that he were anyplace but here.
dimestore lipstick
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:12 am [Reply]

GotFuzzy–
“We should have a meetup anywhere except the retail hell that is Gurnee”

Well, there’s always Woodmans. Hey–that’s an idea! A “multitasking mudge meetup”, where we shop for groceries AND snark on comics.
gh
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:22 am [Reply]

Trying to catch your heart
Is like trying to catch a star,
Not the one in “Tootsie,”
That was Terri Garr,
The other one, the loudmouth,
TV’s Roseanne Barr,
When she gets hot and sweaty
It’s like grabbing a hussar
Hey, where ya goin’, Vera?
Back to your boudoir?
Mind if I come with you?
You can try on this peignoir.
Hey, watch the nails there, Vera,
You might just leave a scar!
And it’s Dr. Drew, the Manwhore,
Stop calling me “Boxcar.”
Anonymous
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:29 am [Reply]

Apropos of nothing really in particular as usual: I realize that all of us or most of us have actual real lives in the “real” work and that we love this site because we love comics and may even love the ones we profess to hate and despise (notice that I said “may”) and I have been reading this blog with pleasure for over a year now (and occasionally contributing remarks, some of which actually elicit responses) — but I am baffled because I never see certain comics snarked. I realize that some comics are so good, that there is little to snark (we all know what they are) and that some comics which are continually snarked are so snarkable that they merit their own snarkblog sites (Gil Thorpe comes IMMEDIATELY to mind) — but there are some strips which are abominably awful and are never mentioned here. This may be because they are carried only a few newspapers. I am thinking of, for instance, Agnes. Now this strip is occasionally funny, sometimes amusing, but it is one of the wierdest, oddest strips to have come along in the past few years, as far as I am concerned, and it frequently deserves a good snarking. So tell me, fellow snarkers,
how many of you actually are able to read it every day? How many of you have never seen it?

Sorry about my lousy spelling.

Incidentally One Big Happy is one of my favorite strips. I like little James. A great character.

I stopped reading Cathy many years ago because it was a total waste of time, wasn’t even worth the 15 seconds it took to read it, with the inevitable “freak out in panel 3″ panel in each day’s strip.
Gabacho
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:31 am [Reply]

#170,175,178 – Would that it were only women in their 20’s in the tight tops. In my last office, cleavage was the way to go for all the women regardless of age. One actually complained to me that she thought some of the men were looking at her breasts. You think?

In all seriousness, why are women doing this at work? It really makes them look, well, tarty. Like they’re selling something other than software.

Mary Worth – I find it touching that Drew and Vera have a song, after just two dates. And what a song…

I still have the original “Trying to Catch Your Heart” Gail Martin 45rpm, and I loved the version Barbra Streisand sang in “The Mirror Has Faces, Too”, her unsuccessful sequel to her worst movie.

But I think everyone will agree that the song came into its own with the Insane Clown Posse cover. Never better.
kris
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:32 am [Reply]

why is vera looking mor and more like mary…and not a real young mary either? it is scary.
kris
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:32 am [Reply]

why is vera looking more and more like mary…and not a real young mary either? it is scary.
commodorejohn
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:54 am [Reply]

9CL – Hey…what’s with 9 Chickweed Lane being amusing two days in a row?

Archie – Because you drew your head all over his math notes. Duh.

BB – Should I be finding this as funny as I am?

Crankshaft – See, this is actually pretty awesome. Crankshaft should be like this more often. Like, all the time.

DT – Oh goody, time for another storyline that will go from potentially awesome to confusing and apathy-inducing over the course of a couple months!

FOOB – Look, if the most tolerable people in my life were my squat, trollish, smothering wife and my normal, likeable granddaughter who’s hated by pretty much everybody for no apparent reason, my glass would be half-empty too.

GT – The improbably-lanky Andrew Gregory has apparently been taking acting lessons from Dr. Drew. Interestingly, this is a lot less jarring in Gil Thorp than it is in Mary Worth.

Marmaduke – TERRIFYING

MW – Panel one: seemingly natural date scene (excepting the appaling jacket Dr. Drew is wearing.) Panel two: unneccessary, seemingly glum reply that indicates either a lack of interest on Vera’s part or a lack of understanding of how “romance” works on Moy’s part, plus absolutely and completely unneccessary explanation from Dr. Drew of what he meant by “they’re playing our song” (he meant exactly what every other human being in world history has meant when they employ that phrase.) This strip is quite close to being Mary Worth in a nutshell – all it’s missing is a smug made-up or grossly extended aphorism from the Meddle Queen of Santa Royale.

RMMD – “You did it! I can feel the heat already!”

Edison Lee – pontificates about how *gasp* the American TV-viewing public would rather watch people getting the crap beat out of them than watch stuffy idiots bitching at each other and pretending to believe what the public believes to a greater extent than the other guy. Gee, I wonder why that could be?

Zits – …what offenses would those be, exactly? I’m just curious here: what’s illegal about driving in circles over and over again?
gagott68
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:04 pm [Reply]

198 commodorejohn: I think Jeremy only has a learner’s permit and thus is required to have a supervising licensed adult in the vehicle with him. There may also be restrictions as to the times he can be driving.
Poteet
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:07 pm [Reply]

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I hurt from laughing so hard, and I really needed a good laugh this morning. Many thanks, you insanely gifted lyricists! Each new demented version boosted the total impact. I really hope Moy and/or Giella check out this thread
Rizbon
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:13 pm [Reply]

As a young, single woman in New York City, I must unfortunately admit that I do not find the Apt. 3-G girls’ depressing sex lives at all unrealistic. What is unrealistic is that they never seem to end up tearfully describing their loneliness to homeless people in a Papaya Dog at 4 a.m.
Poteet
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:19 pm [Reply]

# 200 — And I swear I did finish that sentence with a period. Oh well.
Allie Cat
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:22 pm [Reply]

#202 – No problem, Poteet – I think the only person worried about a missed period is Vera Shields, if you get my drift.
Rainbird
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:29 pm [Reply]

181 smacky Now that everyone has pointed out it is a real song, I am amazed that I know it. Does this mean that Mary Worth is set in the 1980s then?

And does Vera look repulsed because she hates that song?
Poteet
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:32 pm [Reply]

MW — Good lord, it’s a REAL SONG.

http://www.lyricsbox.com/c-music-factory-lyrics-waiting-for-a-star-to-fall-zwz8g5k.html
Poteet
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:33 pm [Reply]

# 205 — Sorry, I’m a little slow on the uptake, but I couldn’t quite believe it.
Rainbird
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:34 pm [Reply]

<b. 194 Anonymou

I read Agnas all the time, but didn’t realize that was it’s name. It is just below Chickweed lane and above AP3G in the Houston Chron line up. I don’t get it in my local paper. I guess it isn’t snarked as much because it tries to be funny and often is.

As for Cathy, I keep trying to go back to it, thinking it will have gotten better. It never does. I was thinking that it is now trying to do a Dilbert but failing miserably at it. Who has yoga at work? Who cares?
Starrynight
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:40 pm [Reply]

#198 commodorejohn- I, too, have found the last couple of 9CL’s amusing. Maybe Brooke is on vacation.

On another note, sometimes I really “get” Amos. Maybe I need professional help? However, it’s frightening to think that though he went to a private Catholic high school, he still got as much or more of an education in smut talk as kids in public school…
The Ghost of Jarrod
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:43 pm [Reply]

MW- Do you remember our song? Remember? From when we were dating, an hour or so ago in Mary Worth time? Remember? Huh? Huh? Rem — look, Vera, let me me honest, I’m just reading this dialog because the average age of our readers is 132. Anyhow, want to play hide the banana?
queek
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:44 pm [Reply]

163: Mulletcraft? Billy Raycraft Cyrus?

151: there have been hyenas in PBS before, just not recently. I think. *googles* ah yes, twice. Thank you, Wiki!

For those of you that read Frazz, did today’s strip remind you of earlier discussions on isopods? Just curious.
Deena in OR
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:46 pm [Reply]

Starrynight-

The trumpeterDuckling went to four years of Catholic school, and graduated last year. (Former all girls school…recently gone co-ed.) He’s pretty much as well informed as any public school kid. Of course, he also grew up hanging about in community theatre, so….. :)
Deena in OR
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

Re: Vera and Drew…

“Hey, baby! They’re playin’ our song-
The one we used to play, when we used to get alo-ong!”

I shouldn’t be able to remember that song, I’m *much* too young.
AhClem
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:57 pm [Reply]

#212 Deena in OR -

Oh, thank you VERY MUCH for planting that earworm!
Aaahhh! Make it stop!
dimestore lipstick
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:58 pm [Reply]

Rainbird–
The company I work for has yoga/pilates/aerobics etc. available at work, so I didn’t think that was weird.

No, what I find bizarre about Cathy is that she still manages to find places to [attempt to] buy clothes that have stout, middle-aged salesladies in support hose with their pencils tucked behind the ear for handwritten saleslips (and yet all the clothes they sell are skimpy, sexy, and youth-driven.)

What world is she living in? Cripes, go to the plus-size department at Wallly World and buy your damn baggy sweats, you noseless freak.
commodorejohn
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

#212 Deena in OR – Echoing that sentiment.
AhClem
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:03 pm [Reply]

A while back, somebody here pointed out a good rule of thumb for avoiding the worst of the C(MD) strips:

One or more fingers pointed at the sky ===> DON’T READ.

I know that rule has spared me a lot of mental anguish. If I need more, there is always Mary Worth.
Allie Cat
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:04 pm [Reply]

#212 – Deena – my husband and I, who are also way too young to know that song make fun of it whenever we hear it. We’ve considered making it “our song” so that we can say:

“Hey, baby, they’re playing our song: ‘Hey Baby They’re Playing Our Song’.”

In reality, “Our Song” is the tender yet raunchy stylings of The Showmen’s “39-21-40 Shape” – 1965’s version of ‘Baby Got Back’.
Calico
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:05 pm [Reply]

#203 – Ohhhh Yeaaaahhh!
Dots can be a girl’s best friend…
Calico
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:07 pm [Reply]

#204 – I think Mary Worth is set in the now, but in Mary’s head it’s 1857.
Artist formerly known as Ben
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:13 pm [Reply]

#194
I both like “Agnes” and like to goof on it. It’s not on Josh’s personal comics page, which is why you don’t hear more about it. Same probably goes for “Sherman’s Lagoon” and others.
Bootsy
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

# 205, Poteet, I followed that link (thanks a lot!) and was reminded why I should never read lyrics to pop songs. (Answer: because they make no sense) I was briefly charmed by misreading a line that I thought was “Carrying your head in my arms” and was brightened by the visual of it until I realized that, alas, I indeed read it wrong the first time.
True Fable
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:18 pm [Reply]

#194 Anonymous – I do not snark Agnes because I CANNOT STAND TO LOOK AT AGNES. It’s like snarking on Sylvia, which is unreadable most of the time anyway. I don’t even bother. Nor do I touch Grin and Bear It, an boring old comic that I have HATED since I was old enough to read comics, that’s well over four decades of hate right there.

To be sure, I hate Cathy and hope the comic dies the same very loud and obnoxious death as it is in life, but Cathy has some specifics to dislike. Agnes, Sylvia and Grin and Bear It don’t even have that. If my eyes automatically reject even the act of VIEWING the comic, I have nothing to be able to say about it.

Other comics simply pass under my snarking radar – either they don’t look interesting, or they are in that uncomfortable valley of unimpressed squalor known as Not Worth It. Maybe it’s only so-so funny, or maybe I’m just not into the humor of it, or maybe I’m just being a grouchy old fuck today and pass it by. Cleats does this to me a lot; I just don’t give a shit about it one way or the other.

Then there are my Favorite Snarking Comics, for good or ill. Either I enjoy making fun of them (Judge Parker, Mark Trail, 9 Chickweed Lane, Hi and Lois) or I enjoy ridiculing them as they roast under the pinpoint of my magnifying glass (Dennis the Menace, Cathy (Must Die), (What The) Dick Tracy, Edison Lee, Funky Winkerbean. And of course, my perpetual foe, FBoFW, which daily bespoils every chance it has to pull itself out of its own tracks and on the road to Respectability from a Fable point of view.

But sure, I will snark some of the comics nestled in my personal Valley of Unimpressed Squalor and see what happens. Naturally I do not expect anything to come of it because (a) things that don’t leave much of an impression are hard to track, and (b) my opinion is often considered Not Worth It too, especially if one is a fan of FBOFW, Cathy or Funky Winkerbean. :-)
Tim T.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:22 pm [Reply]

MW for 1/22: “Let’s grab some eats!” is (probably) not an invitation to a formal dinner, so Drew’s “…I relish the thought!” thought probably means he’s anticipating hot dogs for lunch! (The hand signals may confirm this, but I’m not sure.)
yerwoodman
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:30 pm [Reply]

MW: Bets on whether the freakishly large hand that appears to be Dr. Drew’s is a) his left, b) his right or c) the right hand of someone he’s holding down below the panel?
And–what could be lamer than his attempt at warmth in panel 2? Assuming they weren’t shacked up, “together” is painfully generic–if you can’t remember anything more specific than the two of you were in the same vicinity, you shouldn’t be associating it with a song, Drew.
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

I agree that Agnes is weirdly drawn to the point of being ugly, and initially, this prevented me from ever getting into the strip. However, over the months, it kind of snuck up on me, and I actually grew to like it somewhat. The dialogue often seems true to the spirit of “kid” conversations with their non sequiturs and flights of imagination. The strip sure is kinda gross to look at, though.

“Sherman’s Lagoon” is one of my favorite strips, but seems never to get mentioned here.
wanders
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:48 pm [Reply]

MW: The brilliance of “Waiting for a Star to Fall” as Drew and Vera’s song is that it is featured in two powerful films: “Three Men and a Little Lady” and “Look Who’s Talking Too.” Which I’m sure are their two favorite movies (I know they’re mine)! And both happen to be sequels, just like we’re now reading the Drew and Vera SEQUEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had no idea how many layers to this story you could discover with on a slow day. But it was either this or “pull and Aldo.” Thank you Comics Curmudgeon for giving me a reason to live. Albeit a pretty flimsy reason.
gh
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:49 pm [Reply]

#225 Skullturf Q. Beavispants –

Sherman’s Lagoon is also one of my favorites. It makes me laugh. But then, so does Mark Trail. And Margo. But don’t tell her; she’d kill me.

#222 True Fable –

Other comics simply pass under my snarking radar – either they don’t look interesting, or they are in that uncomfortable valley of unimpressed squalor known as Not Worth It. Maybe it’s only so-so funny, … Cleats does this to me a lot; I just don’t give a shit about it one way or the other.

That sums up Mother Goose & Grimm for me. I have to read it (because it’s in the paper and it’s not Cathy), but honestly – hideous and only rarely, barely amusing. Tired. Not worth snarking for me.
Eric the Baker
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:50 pm [Reply]

Zits gotta get Jeremy processed out of jail, and clear that cell, cause they have Ben from Luann in booking on a Statuatory rape charge.

FBoFW so now Iris can read Jim’s mind. He can’t talk, but she can tell what his outlook on life is, and furthermore, can’t understand why he’s so “down”. Probably feels he should just “get over it”.
gagott68
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:55 pm [Reply]

FOOB: So Jim’s health is good. I guess that’s Johnston’s way of telling us that she’s not going to mercifully kill him off but rather will force us to watch his pathetic degeneration until we’re forced to gouge out our own eyeballs with a grapefruit spoon.
Mr. O'Malley
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:58 pm [Reply]

221. Bootsy, maybe you were thinking of that all-time classic song With Her Head Tucked Underneath Her Arm. There is an MP3 available. Apparently there is still a problem posting links?

http://www.archive.org/details/StanleyHolloway
Bootsy
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:19 pm [Reply]

# 230, Mr. O’Malley, I actually followed Poteet’s link and read the words to the song referenced in MW, insipid thoough it was. Hence my happy misread.

From the title, yours sounds way better anyway.
Anonymous
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:30 pm [Reply]

Mary Worth Music – Well, You Tube of course has it all. Here is the link for those who need to hear the song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nzaph2OBuqM

Foob – I don’t like this strip but read it since people write funny things about it here and I like reading funny things and getting them. Having said that, the only two characters I have any feeling for are April and Iris.

They are screwed, both of them. Iris married a man who is neglected by his binge eating daughter and his ever absent son. She is expected to do everything and he’s not an easy guy.

April is clearly a fictional afterthought whose upbringing was abandoned by her too self involved parents and is too young to know it’s not her – it’s them.

I hope Iris leans over to her and say, “Run, run before it’s too late.”

April and Iris should form their own comic strip.
Gabacho
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:32 pm [Reply]

^^^#232^^^ I’m sorry. that was me.
Paperback Rifler
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:44 pm [Reply]

And some snark for a thread to die by:

Dennis the Menace: “At least you don’t havta worry about parting your hair.”
And Mr. Wilson breathes a sigh of relief that Dennis has never seen Mr. Wilson’s bare back, where there is hair long enough to style into dreadlocks. Actually, I’m breathing a sigh of relief for never having seen that, either.

Snuffy Smith: Judging from the way that “Granpaw” performs a three hundred and sixty degree head turn, he still might be an exorcism away from even thinking about getting into heaven.

Gil Thorpé: Alternative text for panel 2, were that panel to be taken out of context:
— “Wow, this new moisturizer makes my skin so soft and supple, I can’t stop touching my own face! Mmmm . . . smooooooth . . .”
— “Face . . . so numb . . . better lay off the Botox . . .”
— “Rochester, what kind of makeup is this?”
— “. . . or should I make an iced tea?”
— “Oh, no! I’m still wearing my pearl earrings from last night’s cotillion! Boy, is my face red! Ha, ha! And what the — I’m still wearing my Manolo Blahniks, too! So that’s why all those construction workers were whistling at me!”
— “Whoops! I missed my nose again! Just lemme have one more try, Officer; it’s an elusive rascal . . .”
— “Psst! Fire, BAD!”

And I’m rather too late for the “Waiting for a Star to Fall” lyricfest; but I’ve spent minutes and minutes on the following, so I’m a-gonna post it, by cracky! This is what I imagine it would sound like if Drew’s thoughts were set to music and amounted to something more complicated than “La, la, la, la, light bulb”; and I’m glad to see that my lyrics are only slightly more daft than those in the actual song (see #205, and thanks, Poteet!). Anyway, apologies to everybody everywhere:

[verse 1]
I hear your name whispered on the wind —
Oh, no; wait; the wind calls me!
I know I’m God’s greatest gift to women,
I’m a stud; all the girls say, “Squeee!”
It’s true that things before could not be queerer,
But now I have a chance to bang you, Vera . . .

Trying to catch your heart
Is like grabbing your pony tail.
You know I ain’t no gelding, baby;
It’s you I wanna nail . . .

[chorus]
Waiting ’til you’re over Von
And bring your sweet butt to Dr. Drew
That’s what’s good for you,
Get some Drew, baby, yeah!
[repeat]

[verse 2]
I know that I was an awful cheat,
And we split with a loud racket.
I don’t want us to end, my sweet,
So I wore my hypno-jacket.
Our last encounter had left me humbled,
But I know you wanna ride the Cory Bum Boat . . .

Trying to catch your heart
Is like eating an ice cream cone:
I know you want a double dip, girl,
And mine comes with a bone . . .

[chorus]
Waiting ’til you’re over Von
And bring your sweet butt to Dr. Drew
That’s what’s good for you,
Get some Drew, baby, yeah!
[repeat]

[bridge]
Waiting (Wait for you girl . . .)
I don’t like waiting (Hey, look! A squirrel!)
It’s so hard waiting (. . . hope she’s not late . . .)
Seems like waiting makes me realize I’m great!

[chorus]
Waiting ’til you’re over Von
And bring your sweet butt to Dr. Drew
That’s what’s good for you,
Get some Drew, baby, yeah!
[repeat ad nauseam, and I DO mean "nauseam"]
commodorejohn
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:47 pm [Reply]

#230 Mr. O’Malley – Whoa, I didn’t know archive.org even had a 78 RPM section. You’ve successfully whiled away the rest of my afternoon =) (Hey, I didn’t know “I’m Henery The Eighth I Am” was written before Herman’s Hermits recorded it!)

#232 Gabacho – Yep. I’d probably like Iris more if she (A) wasn’t drawn as such a gremlin by Lynn and (B) wasn’t so smothering/ineptly untactful towards her husband, but she’s definitely one of the characters I dislike least. And April, of course, just needs to get the hell out of Foobville.
gagott68
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:52 pm [Reply]

235. commodorejohn:

#232 Gabacho – Yep. I’d probably like Iris more if she (A) wasn’t drawn as such a gremlin by Lynn and (B) wasn’t so smothering/ineptly untactful towards her husband, but she’s definitely one of the characters I dislike least. And April, of course, just needs to get the hell out of Foobville.

But Iris has to be drawn as a gremlin because she’s not a Patterfoob by blood.
Moon Mullins
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:58 pm [Reply]

#232 Gabacho –

Thanks for posting the link to that song — I didn’t think I had ever heard it before, and in fact hadn’t. Not sure how I missed that one, but the year it came out I was mostly listening to Grateful Dead tapes instead of the radio.

Gaaack, what an awful song.

I do like the appropriately painful 80’s outfits in the video though. Laugh today kids — tomorrow it will be your turn to have your clothes ridiculed!
Tili
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:05 pm [Reply]

Lately we’ve been seeing a self-centered prick spend several days’ worth of comics thought-ballooning his way into the setup for the storyline equivalent of “pride goeth before a fall”. Am I talking about Andrew Gregory or Dr. Drew Cory? I think I don’t need to choose: they’re the same person! Consider the eerie similarities in name: Drew Cory is basically Andrew Gregory with the first syllables dropped out. But Dr. Drew lacks Andrew’s idiosyncratic language (”gents”, “the A-Train”) and forehead curl. What could make him want to change his name, get rid of his most obvious identifying characteristics, and move to another town? Dun dun dunnnnn!
AtomicDog
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:21 pm [Reply]

216 AhClem: That was me, and I stick by it. Finger in the air, and I’m on to the next strip. I’m down to probably only three or four Cathys a month.
Sans Sense
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:33 pm [Reply]

MT: “That rifle shot came from someone on that pontoon plane…Andy, we’d better hurry over there and return their bullet before they think we took it.”
Sans Sense
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:41 pm [Reply]

Or…

“That rifle shot came from someone on that pontoon plane…let’s take our canoe boat and get off the lake pond!”
AhClem
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:43 pm [Reply]

#239 AtomicDog -
Ah, thanks! I couldn’t remember who posted it originally. It has become one of my three cardinal rules for reading comics:

1. Avoid reading any Cathy strip with fingers pointing to the sky.
2. Imagine all of Mark Trail’s dialogue in a “Larry the Cable Guy” voice.
3. Pretend that all of the action in Mary Worth is taking place inside the bottled city of Kandor.
rhymes with puck
January 23rd, 2008 at 3:59 pm [Reply]

MW: Drew will be so surprised when he finds the real reason for their meeting: Vera needs to tell Drew about how she had contracted herpes from her brother, thought it was under control when they dated, but has since noticed the part of the Valtrex commercial where they say it can be transmitted even when no symptoms are present and your hair is in a ponytail.

Marmaduke: Pluggers suffer from crushing loneliness and only have dogs for friends. Oh, wait, this isn’t Pluggers? Then this makes no ^%&$-ing sense.

Phantom: I hope the Ghost-with-abs refuses to accept Kay into the Jungle Patrol now that she quit her job. NEXT: Crushing Poverty!
AhClem
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:09 pm [Reply]

MW – Everyone assumes that Vera is going to tell Drew that (a) she’s pregnant, or (b) she’s contracted a horrible, fatal STD from her brother Von.

This is Mary Worth, people! Unless you can get pregnant or catch a venereal disease from sitting in the dark, holding hands and eating from the same microwave popcorn bag, it ain’t gonna happen.
Original Lee
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:10 pm [Reply]

Poteet: Wonderful! I had mentally appended the melody of “Catch a Falling Star and Put It In Your Pocket” to the original phrase when I read the strip, and your first verse actually matches it pretty well. I laughed so hard I almost swallowed my gum.
Original Lee
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:10 pm [Reply]

That was #127 Poteet, BTW.
Original Lee
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:17 pm [Reply]

#168 SBB: Thanks for the Ogden Nash touch with this lyric.
GotFuzzy
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:28 pm [Reply]

dimestore lipstick, I love the idea of a multitasking mudge meetup (mostly I just love alliteration). Plus, there are so few places around here that I’d want to/would tolerate sitting around and snarking for hours, except maybe for The Brat Stop. We could even grocery shop in the style of comics characters, like forgoing the use of a cart and instead balancing everything precariously in our arms (Dagwood). Or freaking out at the fat content of everything while spraying sweat droplets from our foreheads and thrusting index fingers skyward (Cathy [Must Die]) or lading the cart with butter tarts an’ apple pies an’ big greasy burgers, probably tearing into all of it before checking out, then bitching about how fat an’ dumpy we’re getting before dancing around singing “hoop-yeah” (Elly PatterFOOB). Of course, we’d each have to have at least one bag with a bunch of celery and a baguette poking out.
Mountain Mama
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:33 pm [Reply]

Just getting caught up with everything, and I want to say that yesterday’s TDIET was marvelous. Best ever, Mr. Scaduto!
Original Lee
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:35 pm [Reply]

More MW song: I’m beginning to think I listened to the wrong radio stations during the 80s. We recently had an 80s-themed holiday party at my daughter’s school, and we were supposed to bring our favorite tunes from the 80s to dance to. I didn’t think either Julie Brown or The Cockroaches were appropriate for that age group, though, so I didn’t bring anything and spent the evening listening to a lot of stuff I’d never heard before. Thanks for the links, though!
Rainbird
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:38 pm [Reply]

242 AhClem

I love the idea of Mary Worth being in the bottled city of Kandor. Is this the version where Jimmy Olsen and Superman sometimes visit too?

Is Superman looking down at them with his special magnifying glass, and can communicate with the Mary Worth crew?
teenchy
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:48 pm [Reply]

# 217 Allie Cat: In reality, “Our Song” is the tender yet raunchy stylings of The Showmen’s “39-21-40 Shape” – 1965’s version of ‘Baby Got Back’.

Do I detect a beach music aficionado?!?

“39-21-40 Shape” is always great played back-to-back with the Dominoes’ “Sixty Minute Man.”
bats :[
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:51 pm [Reply]

123. TF: civic pride, that’s what it’s all about. Civic pride.
And seeing what the Manwhore is up to.

145. BEG: I think I like your song the best so far, if only because it mentions “fart,” and that is especially appealing to my juvenile sense of humor.
I’ll bet Dr. Drew would laugh at that, too.

156. TF: Yes, I was thinking hat/clothes rack (like the usual fate of exercise equipment in the bedroom). On warm, sunny days, when he’s napping out on the balcony, he’d probably make a good bird feeder, although the errant squirrel might annoy him.

198. commodorejohn re FOOB: not only would your glass be half empty, but your teetch would be floating in it.

205. Poteet re “the song”: sumbitch!
Then again, I don’t think it was a hit for C&C Music Factory. The only hit I can recall from that fine group is “Gonna Make You Sweat/Everybody Dance Now,” which is far more appropriate for the Rex ‘n’ Niki log cabin shenanigans…
Sans Sense
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:57 pm [Reply]

Rex and Niki are now on their third log cabin and, still, no shenanigans. No skullduggeries, no rumpuses, no nuttin.
bats :[
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

232. Gabacho re “the song”: sumbitch! I do recognize that song! Argh…
(Does it help to say that I’ve always loathed it as 80s pap?)

For the record, I don’t have a hate-on for Iris that many folks do. I think her (weak) attempts at humor are made for her own benefit, to look at the bright side of life, when in reality she’s stuck with Jim. Yes, she married him, but geez…as Gabacho mentioned, Elly and her absentee foobaphone brother must thank their lucky stars every night that they’re not saddled with caring for him.
Allie Cat
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:05 pm [Reply]

#252 – We’re both fans of 50’s and 60’s R&B Soul, which definitely means Beach music as well – I especially like the Coasters (Little Egypt in particular) and the Drifters.

Mostly, we love this song because while the overall tone is very much a love ballad, the lyrics are really all about her smokin’ bod.

This was our “First Dance” song at our wedding. I don’t think anyone was paying attention to the lyrics. But when we found out the band had this on their playlist, we went “Apeity Ape”. Our band loved us for this. Also, because we told them not to wear their tuxes in August.
AhClem
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:12 pm [Reply]

#251 Rainbird -
You may be on to something there. AfkaB #180 already alluded to Spit-Curl boy relocating to Charterstone, where he could pass for Superman. Dye Jimmy Olsen’s hair blue-black, and you have Dr. Drew.

We could also get Lois Lane to become Dawn, Perry White as Chinbeard, Lana Lang as Toeby, and Krypto the Superdog as Mary herself.

Oh, and Superman, if you’re watching them with a magnifying glass, would it be too much trouble for you to turn your back to the sun so it’s shining through the glass? Thank you. And please get your super-vision looked at afterwards, so you won’t need the magnifying glass any more.
commodorejohn
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:20 pm [Reply]

#255 bats :[ – “Elly and her absentee foobaphone brother must thank their lucky stars every night that they’re not saddled with caring for him.”

Elly!? Thankful!? What alternate-universe FOOB are you reading?
Niall
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:34 pm [Reply]

BLARGH

My United flight to O’Hare has been delayed two hours, but of course my connection to San Jose will leave on time. I declined the option of leaving here tomorrow morning, as it would mean teh same rigmarole.

So I’m going to O’Hare tonight… and spending the night trying to stay awake in the terminal. This is on top of last night where I got 2 hours of sleep.

This is a fun way to start a vacation…

(I last went through O’Hare in winter about 9 years ago. Thigs have… changed.)
Mountain Mama
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:53 pm [Reply]

NOOOOO!!! Niall, you mustn’t. Rebook! Rebok and run for your life, even!

Don’t go to O’Hare…….*sobbing*

The last two times I had to connect through there….*shuddering*
queek
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:57 pm [Reply]

There’s a very interesting article in Newsweek about Candorville’s Darrin Bell and a “demonstration” that he and 8 other minority cartoonists are planning for Feb 10.

http://www.newsweek.com/id/96394

(hope the link works)

short version is that all 9 artists will be doing a variation on the same strip.
Deena in OR
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:02 pm [Reply]

Mountain Mama–Worse than Hartsfield? Is that even possible?
commodorejohn
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:03 pm [Reply]

#261 queek – Hmm. I can sort of see his point, but the only thing I can see coming out of this is the sudden appearance of token black characters in the funnies, which I’m pretty sure is not construable as “progress” in the integration of the comics world.
Uncle Lumpy
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:22 pm [Reply]

#263 –

Seems retrograde and brain-addled: “We’ll show you we’re not alike! We’ll be alike!”

Also, folks, if you’ve got a problem with your treatment by syndicates and newspaper editors, um, why are you taking it up with your readers? When you walk into a store and see the staff arguing, you don’t take sides: you walk out.
gagott68
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:30 pm [Reply]

#261 queek: I’m assuming that Candorville, H&J, Curtis, Jump Start, Housebroken and The Boondocks are among the 15. What are the others? Or is Boondocks even still going or is in zombie-state? I lost track after McGruder went on “hiatus”.

Funny commentary on McGruder’s “hiatus”:

http://wonkette.com/politics/comics/young-black-comic-artist-gets-bored-of-newspapers-quietly-walks-away-203461.php

Good luck taking a slap at the readers. We like to slap back.
Deena in OR
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:30 pm [Reply]

264-Indeed. That’s about like the time that I went into a daycare center to apply for a teaching job and encountered the director verbally abusing a staff person in the front office. I didn’t even bother to stay and fill out the appy.
Mountain Mama
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:39 pm [Reply]

I have to admit I’ve never flown through Hartsfield. Going to Pittsburgh from Phoenix and back, I usually end up going through Dallas or Chicago. The last two times I had to connect through O’Hare were not fun, hence my advice.
commodorejohn
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:41 pm [Reply]

#265 gagott68 – Herb & Jamaal? Hmm…

HERB: Did you celebrate the recent national holiday honoring a famous civil-rights leader?
JAMAAL: Sure did! I went to see the organized event at the public venue featuring performances by acclaimed entertainers!
INSUFFERABLY SMUG PASTOR: Civil rights is like the Bible: kids these days take it for granted.
Deena in OR
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:47 pm [Reply]

#268-

Herb and Jamaal must have been attending the same event that Curtis attended. Guess the guys failed to give that acclaim to Michelle :)
Laura c
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:48 pm [Reply]

#259 Niall – I went through O’Hare last weekend. I hope you like Quiznos.
BTW, I bought my kid a gift at the Field Museum booth — Terminal B, I think, if you want to browse a small selection of books about anthropology and dinosaurs.
Ukulele Ike
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:54 pm [Reply]

queek @ 261: Oooooooooo, a demonstration! This will be fun! And it will give Bell a chance to snap away from this deadly “Insane Vegetarian Chick Who has had Lamont’s Baby and is Now Ruining His Life” story-line….which had damn better well turn out to be “all a dream!” or else the V.C. actually got knocked up by somebody else and will soon disappear, because this plot is COMPLETELY DESTROYING ANY PLEASURE I EVER TOOK IN BELL’S STRIP.
dimestore lipstick
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:55 pm [Reply]

GotFuzzy
Well, since you said that, now we can’t NOT do it. See you in the spring.
Anonymous
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:58 pm [Reply]

205. Poteet, not only is it a real song but you have probably heard it before since it was very popular in 1988. It is a really crappy and really sappy p.o.s., definitely not “my song”. I think the lyrics are about Corey the younger, especially the line about “so many people love you baby. The Vegas line is favoring Vera’s relocation from Santa Royale. Affect Advertising probably promoted her workaholicism and is moving her to corporate hq in Cap City. She never realy fit in at Charterstone, anyway…
Ukulele Ike
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:02 pm [Reply]

Niall: Good luck at O’Hare, and thank you for turning me on to “Edge City.” I really enjoyed “The Hots” until the artists decided they weren’t making enough money and quit, and “Edge City” fills the “Cute Neurotic Jewish Couple” void that “The Hots” left behind. They may live in the burbs instead of the city and have kids, but the two adult leads remind me of Max and Hannah anyway.

http://www.ninapaley.com/hots.html
Mooncattie
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:17 pm [Reply]

Ah, I used to dream of being at O’Hare. Our parents used to abandon us at Toronto Pearson, and that’s if we were lucky.
Mr. O’Malley
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:26 pm [Reply]

259 YYZ-ORD-SJO Just did that. Got stuck overnight on the way there. AIrline gave us a “discount” on a hotel that charged us $11 for a one-minute phone call to a toll-free number. O’Hare doesn’t seem to have any phones that take credit cards. On the way back both flights were delayed an equivalent amount–your only chance.

270. Skip Quizno’s. The Chinese food is more or less edible, also the gyros in concourse L.

Good luck!
Alfred E. Neuman
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:34 pm [Reply]

Beetle Bailey–
Camp Swampy really is at the bottom of the Pentagon’s barrel. General Halftrack’s gas mask doesn’t even cover his mouth. Better he should wear the full-faced version worn by Sam in panel 1 of Judge Parker.
Alternatively, (and more likely), Halftrack is not wearing a gas mask at all, but a super breathing device to help him get a concentrated dose of “Essence of Buxley.”
Jamus The Bartender
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:35 pm [Reply]

Ok. Seems whenever Jamus snarks on the daily funnies, Josh picks that time to do the day’s entries. SO…without further ado, let’s get this party started…
9CL: Dear, sweet Lord in heaven….SETH! Please help these people…
DIck Tracy: Damn, that was a close one. You almost had to talk with Tess about your feelings. Aren’t wrist radios terrific?
FOOB: Hm…lemme see here….the doctor thinks it’s depression that makes him so slow….and why would he be depressed….Let’s see…he’s got a grandson who , the only thing he’s talked to Jim Nuts about all year is his “book”, he’s got a grandaughter who had a chance to do interesting things, but settled on marrying her father….I mean marrying Anthony Caine…
And then there’s Elly….AND THEN THERE’S ELLY…
Boxcar.
Spider-Man: I know why all the television. It makes for a convenient segue, like Frank Miller did with Dark Knight. Thing is, this is about eight time zones away from being Dark Knight. Maybe more.
Sally Forth: Seems like Ted’s becoming the “dumb dad” that the Christian Right is always railing against, like Stan Marsh’s dad on South Park. I’m praying Ted gets drunk and gets into a fistfight with a big guy in a wrestling costume.
Rex Morgan: Where’s Ned Beatty and three inbred mountain people when you need them.
Mary Worth: Enciente, as the Spanish say….
Judge Parker: As Eddie Murphy once said, “Once you go with a man with no legs, you’ll never go back…” Go Gloria!!
Funky Winkerbean: That was one quick trip. What happened to the kids clumsily making out in the back of the bus? What happened to the kids who sneak in peach schnapps? Damn kids these days…In my day, when we went on a cross country bus trip, it started wth a poker game, and ended with a poker game.
Family Circus: I don’t disagree, Billy, but, just remember, you’ll be going to school well past June the fifteenth. Ah well, Hogan’s Heroes is on next….
Crankshaft: I’m thinking the visit to the hospital will happen before Saturday. Yeah, Saturday at the latest…
Vince M
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:38 pm [Reply]

212, 213: Yeah…kind of a drag, isn’t it?
Sans Sense
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:40 pm [Reply]

MW: What is Vera Shields up to? She definitely has news and, from the looks of it, bad news. Vera’s uncharacteristic contriteness, her 70’s Norma Kamali sleeping bag body armor coat and her magically disappearing purses (and only ONE reappears!!) hint at something hidden, something sinister.

I doubt relocation, I mean this is a comic strip not a soap opera where role players’ salaries go up every year so deaths and relocations are the norm. Unless perhaps Giella and Moy are as tired of drawing her as we are of looking at her? But what can be so hard about drawing her pony tail stretched visage? And surely it must be fun to dig into the Grrranimals archives for her perpetually mismatched and out of date outfits?

I am seriously doubting anything of a sexual nature (it is Mary Worth after all) so that leaves out pregnancy or an STD (even though Drew does work at a family clinic). I suppose rekindling with Drew is bad news in its own right.

But no, it has to be something deeper, unexpected. Why the awkward duck-lipped kiss followed by damn near textbook closed body language? I am on pins and needles. Damn the gods for allowing such riveting vinettes to be created. The tension is unbearable. I must know. I cannot wait for the action to unfold in only two panels a day for weeks on end. I need closure. I need insight. Sigh…I need… help.
Sans Sense
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:53 pm [Reply]

If you took the word balloons out of Gil Thorp it looks like a pretty decent all gay version of High School Musical.
ChattyGenes
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:00 pm [Reply]

Re #127 Poteet, (in a very small way #132 me), #205 Poteet, and all other contributers…

It’s a real song???

Good Lord, I’m glad we (Poteet, you, me) didn’t realize that! Or, ignored the fact, if we did.

I’m continuing to laugh. (I can say it again because it’s a new day over here, and I just got up.) Thanks, all!
Little Guy
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:02 pm [Reply]

GA: Just when I thought I had to hum the theme from “Branded” to get through this week, here comes this bit of CC(#62) serendipity. But when are we going to see the other guy getting the third degree for threatening a Federal employee?

Zits: This is running neck and neck with Luann for the longest reset button. Spiderman has them beat by months.

Dick Tracy: Anyone else, and the Govennor could use his political clout and discredit Dick as a delusional crackpot who planted evidence and claimed that he talked with a ghost.

Beetle Bailey: Buxley’s got BO!

Gil Thorp: Yeah, yeah, the moral of the story is teamwork. But if Andrew starts hopping around in a walking boot, you’d panic.
Jamus The Bartender
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:20 pm [Reply]

242/3: Works for me. Maybe Power Girl and Supergirl, dressed up in their cool Nightwing and Flamebird costumes will lay the smack down on Dr. Drew.
See…back in the day, Superman and Jimmy Olsen used to dress up as Batman and Robin, only they were called Nightwing and Flamebird, but with different costumes….and now Power Girl and Supergirl are doing the same thing….
My inner geek is coming out in force…
Hooray For Socks!
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:34 pm [Reply]

I’ve never had too many problems thru O’hare (go back to IN twice a year or so to see family), except for the mass of crowds… of course it depends on when you fly. The bummer about being there too late/early in the day is that *everything* is closed – you’d think with an int’l airport that big, they’d have a few things open all night…
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:38 pm [Reply]

GotFuzzy and Dimestore Lipstick: My girlfriend lives in Waukegan, so I visit there on a regular basis. Count me in on a Chi-Town meetup. And I know there are others in the area who weren’t able to make the Madison ‘Mudgeon Meetup 2007 (MMMMMXII), but might be able to join us this time. Happy Happenstance is one. Others who live in the Milwaukee area might also join us. Please start a thread in the Meetup forum!
Citric
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:04 pm [Reply]

Beetle Bailey: Send him back to sensitivity training? Is it “Grope” by Calvin Klein?
Little Guy
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:13 pm [Reply]

Candorville: You know, we’re gonna discover VC had multiple birthdays during the year, and Lamont won’t even care.
Zamboni_Rodeo
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:15 pm [Reply]

#285, Hooray for Socks!:

Is your name a reference to MST3000 by any chance? Just wondered…
Poteet
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:19 pm [Reply]

# 203 Allie Cat — HAR! I only hope Vera’s real reason for putting us through this Dr. Drew ego-intensive meeting ordeal is half so interesting.

# 221 Bootsy — Your version is so much better than the ghastly reality of “carry your heart into my arms.” Into my ARMS? Is the singer dating an elephant or beluga whale? Not that either might not be an improvement over Vera.

# 226 wanders — Wow. The things I learn on this site. Thank you for providing the complex cultural context for this MW theme song and interpreting it so interestingly. Live long and prosper. And you would definitely have been a much better English major than I ever was.

# 234 Paperback — BWAHAHA! Good work. Your masterpiece has almost made me wish I had the setup and computer smarts to actually see the video of the original. Almost.

# 245 — Thanks, Original Lee. Near-gum-swallowing is a huge compliment.

# 273 — Okay, Anonymous, I’m now intrigued enough that the next time I’m with someone who could maybe download that song and play it for me, I’ll ask. And then hope the person doesn’t attack me with the nearest hard object while it’s playing.
Pogoer
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:19 pm [Reply]

#151 Mr. O’M: Yes, today’s TDIET was mine. Although Mary Worth had nothing to do with it (and neither did any of her neighbors). I wouldn’t particularly care to answer to Biff Biceps from now on, although it would be preferable to Grandma…
Poteet
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:21 pm [Reply]

# 289 Zamboni — Or maybe Hooray for Socks! is a fan of the former First Cat?
Hooray For Socks!
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:43 pm [Reply]

#289/292 – Zamboni – Yup! Overdrawn at the Memory Bank – Mr. Socks and a couple of our friends are fans, and we get together and do MST3K movie & dinner nights. That was one of my favorite lines from that movie (it’s amazing how much funnier those are after a couple bottles of wine/beer!) I was wondering how long it would take someone here to get that one :)
queek
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:45 pm [Reply]

Given the joy expressed here for mash-ups and cross-overs involving a mere pair of strips, the thought of seeing a 9-way get-together of strips should sound awesome, even if it is for a “message.”

jmho.
Pendragon
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:06 pm [Reply]

#284 — Wow — that was your INNER geek?

On the topic of black artists producing comics, does anyone else here have Maintaining in their local dead tree delivery system?
commodorejohn
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:09 pm [Reply]

#293 Hooray For Socks! – It’s amusing how many of us ‘Mudges are MST3K fans as well. Great minds think alike, I suppose.
Pendragon
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:15 pm [Reply]

MST3K = kings of snarking mediocre sci-fi movies
CC = emperors of snarking mediocre comics

Crossover inevitable, I say.
Hooray For Socks!
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:18 pm [Reply]

#296/296 – I totally agree! You guys really bring on some good snark, and I often find myself trying not to laugh out loud at work… and I don’t even have the alcohol I would at home :) I love MST3K, especially because it encourages participation
Turtlefish
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:30 pm [Reply]

Despite the fact that I obsessively read this blog everyday…I hate you Comics Curmudgeon for making me care about Mary Worth
queek
January 24th, 2008 at 3:45 pm [Reply]

295: yes, I do. Replaced “Watch Your Head” in the Freep.

Not a fan of the art, most cases.
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