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Wednesday mostly panels

Lockhorns, 8/8/12

The Lockhorns isn’t just another comic panel; it’s one of the grimmest and most unsparing glimpses into the ways that the absence of love can wear you down into a sense of misery that’s so all-pervasive that you don’t even realize anything else is possible. I love how dead everyone looks in this panel. Leroy is so far gone he can’t even imagine how pathetic and small his request makes him look in front of a stranger; Loretta is dying of embarrassment but can’t summon up the words to explain why; and the pizza delivery kid, slouched over and numb, gets another glimpse of what appears to be the universal soul-crushing awfulness of adulthood, and is getting a crappy tip to boot.

Curtis, 8/8/12

Just a little whimsy in Curtis, where the Wilkins boys help out an old cat lady with some chores and then she drops dead! The facial expressions in the final panel are so great that I feel comfortable forgiving future Weekend at Bernie’s-style zaniness in advance.

Pluggers, 8/8/12

You’re a plugger if you remember when you used to eat at actual restaurants that served recognizable food, but a fried chicken dinner at one of those places cost like $9 plus tip, whereas you can get a 10-piece Chicken Nugget meal for $6, and sure it’s not “chicken” so much as “processed reformed chicken meat” but you get more of it plus it’s a lot faster and you can order right from your car, what does anyone expect you to do, what do you look like, some kind of big city elitist?

Ziggy, 8/8/12

Ha ha, it’s funny because Ziggy has finally realized he’s a slave to global capital!

309 responses to “Wednesday mostly panels”

  1. Honey Badger, Does not give a shit
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:33 am [Reply]

    MT: Cherry teaches a subtle lessons. It’s called a camera, Rusty.

    MW: Neither can I.

  2. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:35 am [Reply]

    (Phew—he was just asleep! Thank goodness.) (See end of last thread)

    MT: “Cherry, am I more of a stool pigeon, a narc, or a tattle-tale? And which one makes me most like Mark?”
    “Oh, Rusty, Mark’s a vigilante! You have a long ways to go before you can take the law into your own hands!”

    JP: “Gosh, Avery, I never realized any of that! Here, let me write you a check for a $20,000 consulting fee!”

    Garf: God help me, I found today’s strip mildly amusing, too. What’s happening to me?

    SM: Yep, even dead Steve Jobs defeats Spider-Man.

  3. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:35 am [Reply]

    Baldo: Ok, I know “fart hydraulics” has to be a malapropism, or spoonerism, of some sort, but I can’t figure out what he intended to say. Any guesses?

  4. debussy fields
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:36 am [Reply]

    Hi and Lois—They’re no longer even TRYING to make me laugh.
    MT—There’s that other kid again.
    FC—The look on Daddy’s face reveals a sudden realization: This kid’s horizontally-stretched melonhead is nothing like my vertically-stretched noggin. In fact, all these kids look more like Thel’s first cousin who stayed with us when we first got married than they do me.

  5. Mary Worthless
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:36 am [Reply]

    It is nice that Mary sent her personal helicopter to rescue Wilbur and Dawn.

    The rest of you on deck can eat gelato.

  6. Ranger
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:37 am [Reply]

    Lockhorns: Is “where do you keep your coupons” code for “blowing the delivery boy”?

  7. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:39 am [Reply]

    Henry: Rookie error. No hat.

  8. Chip Whittle
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:40 am [Reply]

    Mark Trail: “Let me have the chip.” Is it possible we’ve mis-read Mark Trail all along and it’s actually a gritty cyberpunk tale where the deep weirdness is all a consensual-illusion metaphor for a tense, taut struggle between titanic hypernational squirrel megacorporations?

    The Phantom: “In this ring, we secretly fought for control of your streets! Your Homes! Now we’re going back to fighting for control for them in your streets and homes, but using guns instead, where innocent bystanders will get maimed and killed! Wait, that’s a terrible idea! We’re going back to this ring-battle thing! Sorry for the inconvenience.”

    Pluggers: I refuse to believe that Pluggers think fondly of the days before they ate food in “nugget” form. These are people who eat potato chip nuggets and Charleston Chews on a stick, for crying out loud.

    Rex Morgan: There. That third panel. That’s Rex’s official pose for his appearance on Mount Smugmore.

    Spider-Man: Aw, that’s adorable, the strip thinks it’s taking place in the real 21st century! Isn’t it cute? You can almost hear JJJ saying, “All right, one at a time, let me have the chip.”

  9. Jocelyn Knockersbury
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:42 am [Reply]

    At first, I thought Leroy was asking Loretta for pizza coupons, to lower the price of the pizza so the leftover cash would end up being the tip, but then I realized I had spent a good 5 seconds pondering the mechanics of the Lockhorn household economy, which made me really really sad.

  10. Mark B.
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:44 am [Reply]

    Wow, looking at today’s Mark Trail, I realize I must have missed the entire ‘Rusty goes to the orthodontist’ story line.

  11. Powers
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:45 am [Reply]

    Curtis: Notice how nonchalant the cats are about their mistress’ death.

  12. Chyron HR
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:45 am [Reply]

    You’re a Plugger if when you eat fried chicken, you can recognize who’s wife it is.

    Curtis – MOMMY! THE CAT LADY DIED FOR NO REASON AT ALL!!

  13. UncleJeff
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:49 am [Reply]

    MW: I just wanted to say that “Signore Resculini” is my favorite CC name for a bit character since “Senora Momjeans” in MT. (Thanks bb, u for the re-boot).
    Tomorrow, we’ll see Resculini getting decontaminated after that long sweaty swing with Wilbur.

    Phantom: so, THAT’S the real reason for “sports entertainment?”

  14. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:49 am [Reply]

    @Chyron HR (#12): re Curtis: *SNURK!!!!*

  15. Droopy Says
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:49 am [Reply]

    @Powers (#11): Yes. The realism is a striking change of pace in Curtis.

  16. smallwonderrobot
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:52 am [Reply]

    So what do we all think Ziggy said to the teller in the first place?

  17. Nekrotzar
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:52 am [Reply]

    Nowadays, Pluggers sit around a trash can fire communally eating whatever anyone happened to scrounge up that day, and hoping that tomorrow will be better. Funny.

  18. pugfuggly
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:52 am [Reply]

    Pluggers remember when it was still cool to grope your waitress at a truckstop.

    ASM Geez, I don’t want to be around when it dawns on these fools that the internet has already killed most independent print newspapers…

    A3G I figured that it was just a matter of time before a 50 Shades of Grey gender role-reversal story would pop up somewhere. Did not expect it in A3G….

    MT “I’m going to go take a look at the pictures on the computer…you stay in the yard, as usual.”

    MW Does italy make you pay for unnecessary helicopter rescues? Does refusing to dog-paddle two pool-lengths to shore count?

  19. seismic-2
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:52 am [Reply]

    Pluggers: It is shocking to see that male Pluggers engage in swapping sexual favors performed by their chicken-wives, and at a public restaurant, no less.

    Lockhorns: It could be worse. Leroy could offer to tip the pizza boy by offering sexual favors performed by his wife. The pizza boy’s expression indicates he is worried that this could in fact happen.

    Ziggy: That will teach Ziggy not to solicit sexual favors at his bank, just because they are the first people in his life to offer him any form of interest.

    Curtis: How will Curtis and Barry ever get paid by dead cat-lady? Nope. Not going there.

  20. pastordan
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:53 am [Reply]

    Haggar the Horrible walks into a bar, and the bartender says…

    Mark Trail: I predict Rusty will be kidnapped somewhere between the stables and the house. I also predict it will take several weeks before Cherry and Doc notice he’s missing, and a couple more to decide that they care.

    Mary Worth: 1: Dawn! Do you have pizza? 2: This helicopter is doomed. DOOMED.

    Rex Morgan: Rex says, Ho ho ho, I’ve got an assistant like that myself. It’s amazing what you can do with a little “love,” amirite?

    That’s all for me, kiddies. Gotta do “paid” work or something.

  21. Notebooked
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:55 am [Reply]

    In the next wacky, zany installment of Curtis — the old woman is slowly eaten by her cats, and Curtis and Barry can only stare as they wonder whether to chase them away or have them destroy the evidence!

  22. Digger
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:56 am [Reply]

    Notice the Pluggers cartoon depicts the restaurant from the outside so we do not see the horrible act of ritualistic cannabalism engaged in by the Plugger-chickens.
    Pluggers like to keep their skeletons in their closets.

  23. Voshkod
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:57 am [Reply]

    Replace “plugger” with “cannibal” and you can still use the word bubbles in that cartoon.

  24. Leonard
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:58 am [Reply]

    Curtis: I thought people only died in Funky… but I am sure she’s related to Cayla.

  25. teenchy
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:59 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#3): My guess is that Baldo lifts not only with the knees but also with a bit of jet propulsion from his hinder.

    Also, minor kudos – very minor – to Luann for the TSA joke.

  26. Ned Ryerson
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:02 am [Reply]

    Pluggers: For the love of God, the widespread KFC chain still sells fried chicken in the tried and true chicken “body part” format. There’s a KFC in Santa Barbara (and in Goleta!) Don Jessup!

  27. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:04 am [Reply]

    Luann: wait, wut?!? that was actually funny and well played!

    HotC: tomorrow’s panel: “hullo, zeeba naybor!”

    NAoQV: wub wub wub

    Bizarro: more useful than ASM and Captain Victorious put together!

    GT: *flub* *gigglez @ FX*

    MG&G: I always assumed that the swimmers shaved closer than that. . . .

    RwO: guest-written by the Lockhorns.

    6Cx: *baaawwwooooooooooooooooooooooooooooot*

  28. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:05 am [Reply]

    Love Is: putting away “The Joy of Sex” and finding the happy trail less traveled.

  29. TheDiva
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:06 am [Reply]

    Curtis: Their horror is not so much from being in the presence of mortality at such a tender age, but the knowledge that with their mistress dead, the cats now have free reign to wreak terror upon the world, starting with them.

    Pluggers have either forgotten places like KFC, Popeye’s, and Church’s still exist, or are so committed to their stance on the Chik-fil-a issue that they refuse to eat anywhere else.

  30. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:06 am [Reply]

    Baldo: I guess today’s strip was too edgy for the print WashPost; they substituted a different strip. So, yeah, the paper that prints Gene Weingarten and the Style Invitational is too timid to have the word “fart” appear in its comics page.

  31. geekwhisperer
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:07 am [Reply]

    Lockhorns Why does the artist make all the men look like they are wearing ballet tights? Is this really a decades-long tragic ballet about post-war suburban alienation? If so, lets get on with the tragic suicide.

    Mark Trail If they actually show Cherry using an actual computer the Internet will crack and be destroyed forever. This “computer” will always be off-panel, and the idea of the images having been not “downloaded” but “uploaded”, as in emailed to the warden service or posted to Cherry’s Pintrest, will never be broached.

    Mary Worth For some reason the Costa Guardia are using Silent Hawk stealth helicopters, given that Dawn and Wilbur are able to have a nice chat inside.

  32. Illustrator Steve
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:08 am [Reply]

    MT – “Let me have the chip…I’ll download it onto the computer and we can see the poachers.”
    “Okay, Cherry. But for some reason this memory card chip has the name, ‘Kelly Welly’ written on it.”
    “Hmmmm, So! THIS must be Kelly’s memory card that Mark stole out of Kelly’s camera while she wasn’t looking! Rusty, LET’S view this gallery of her thumbnail pictures now that the memory card is in the compu….WHAT?!! WHY are there all these pictures on here of Mark naked and aroused? …and WHAT is he doing wearing that gold bird band on his…! CLOSE your eyes, Rusty! I must call ranger Tom Martin and my divorce lawyer….IMMEDIATELY!”
    “But,but….the VILLAINOUS SHEEP KILLERS!”
    “F–k the sheep killers!”

  33. nescio
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:10 am [Reply]

    I’d like to commend the Lockhorns’ artist (but not so much that I would take the time to find out whether it’s Hoest or Reiner) for depicting the Lockhorn front door as a literal doorway into a horrible existential beige/blue nothingness in which nothing matters except the loveless marriage of the central couple.

  34. Sequitur
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:14 am [Reply]

    @Illustrator Steve (#32):
    “F–k the sheep killers!”
    “Well, okay. If you think that’ll stop them.”

  35. Snarkotix Addict
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:14 am [Reply]

    FW I never thought I’d say this, but I like this one. I mean other than the weird grins.

    A3G Evan really puts the “sick” in sycophant. And by sick, I mean I’m nauseated now.

  36. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:15 am [Reply]

    @teenchy (#25): Ok, maybe he just meant “smart” hydraulics. Possibly referring to those “lowrider” cars that bounce up and down, or something. Or to the human muscular system, which might, loosely, or metaphorically be considered hydraulic.

    That’s my guess, but maybe it’s just some Spanglish phrase gone wrong.

  37. Pozzo
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:15 am [Reply]

    “Pluggers” tries for a Grace Kelly/Cary Grant “To Catch a Thief” vibe, but ends up more like the Waffle House scene in “The Ladykillers.”

  38. Calico
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:18 am [Reply]

    OK, so Curtis has merged with Funky Winkerbean. Wow.

    Pluggers – boy, I’m surprised this chicken debate didn’t go off on another, um, tangent.
    Eat more Kale, dammit!

  39. Mr. Manchineel
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:20 am [Reply]

    A3G: Oh, Evan, Evan, Evan, you just implied that your old firm wasn’t very good in responds to Margo saying they are “the greatest P.R. company on the west coast.” If you want to succeed (i.e., survive) this job you need to remember some simple rules: (1) Don’t look the Margo in the eyes; (2) don’t make any sudden movements around the Margo; and whatever you do, (3) do not contradict the Margo.

  40. Mibbitmaker
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:20 am [Reply]

    Curtis: I thought a cat lady dying was whimsy in modern day Funky Winkerbean!

    Pluggers: God, I hope they’re talking about chicken! (oh, like in Pluggers that’d make it all better somehow!)

    Crank: I dunno… his hedge fund manager’s going to get really sor…. os!
    (I just sunk to Batty’s level, didn’t I?)

    9CL: …..WILLYOUGETAAAUGHHHH~! – Ralph Kramden

    Glibporn: Aw, perfectly good comic book panel structure, dialogue balloons over the gutters to lead the eye, and cool pink grass — wasted on THIS! Damn same-old controlling woman/weenie men trope!

    RMMD: Rex! Stop knowingly and slyly grinning at us readers! It’s CREEPY!

    S-M: Superhero heavy-handedness ruins a perfectly good joke.

    ZtP: A perfectly good joke ruins superhero heavy-handedness. (YAY!)

  41. Irrischano
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:21 am [Reply]

    Why are those pluggers silhouetted and framed from a distance? Do they want to protect the identities of the savages who are killing off all the chicken-lady pluggers?

  42. Marc
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:26 am [Reply]

    Mark Tail- How much do you want to bet that we never actually see the memory card, or “chip, or the computer at all? This will be just like the time that Mark had to check his email but was convienently called away at the last second.

    Luann- Seriously? Why is Luann, who has never really been in a relationship herself, pushing so hard for her frigid friend with unrealistic career expectations to get with a guy as soon as humanly possible. Either she gets a man or her life will be devoid of meaning. Well Luann, for as annoying as Delta is, she has the not a virgin lips. What do you have, besides a couple of near makeout sessions?

    A3G- I guess if you’re looking for anonymity, working for Margo is a good place to start. You’ll always be in the background with her. Just don’t try to upstage her, or you’ll find yourself rolled up in a rug, stuffed in a dumpster somewhere. Oh yeah, you’ll also be dead.

    Mary Worth- Reminds me of the episode of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia where they’re all injured in a car accident because of their own stupidity. They all walk out of the hospital with minor dings and Danny Devito goes “Just thank God nobody important was seriously hurt”. The camera pans to the stranger who was hit, in a full body cast, and he just says “What a bunch of assholes”.

    Funky- “I hope you don’t mind, I promised my dog he could watch other dogs have fun. You know, since he’s not allowed to have any himself since his only purpose in life is to keep my PTSD in check.”

    9CL- So monkeyface isn’t even bothering to look at the music? He’s must be so captivated by the most beautiful ballerina ever, who is so talented that she is the only dancer in the whole show.

  43. TheDiva
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:31 am [Reply]

    A3G: Well, that’s interesting. Most people don’t have “poorer and more obscure” as their career goal.

    C’shaft: So, this entire plot was to set up the lame “hedge fund” pun?

    FW: Face it, Rachel, you’re always going to come in second. Les has Saint Dead Lisa, and Wally has Buddy the Miracle Dog.

    MT: Does anyone call memory cards “chips”? (Actually, I’m just surprised that the characters in Mark Trail still don’t use film.)

    Marvin: “You don’t see mant thirty-year-olds in diapers” is a common encouragement to potty-training parents…but if such a person did exist, it would be Marvin.

    Pibgorn: TL;DR: “My insights are so profound they deserve to be repeated, and often. Huh-huh, pink grass pretty!”

    SM: Clearly this has all been a set-up to reveal the arc’s true villain: Apple Computers!

  44. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:31 am [Reply]

  45. debussy fields
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:33 am [Reply]

    MT–The computer she refers to is from the 1960s. It’s in a room behind the kitchen that takes up three fourths of the cabin space.

  46. Mibbitmaker
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:34 am [Reply]

    New PCK is now up!

    The layout was as much part of the idea as the idea…

  47. Sequitur
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:38 am [Reply]

    Yesterthread we were talking about unfortunate names for people. It works with towns too.

  48. gleeb
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:39 am [Reply]

    Archie: Of course, what we can’t see is the knife Jug has in Archie’s ribs.

    ‘shaft: Take THAT, 1%ers! Tom Batiuk has your number!

    ‘bean: Aw, he’s buying the Magical Healing Dog some tick powder, then making him pay for it by watching other dogs, the kind who get to play.

    Gil: A flub in front of the head pro! Oh, the shame. Get this guy a Magical Healing Dog!

  49. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:39 am [Reply]

    @Mary Worthless (#5): It does seem that a 1-person at a time sling and winch doesn’t really scale when you need to rescue hundreds, maybe thousands of people. They’ll be there all week (try the veal)!

  50. ol man jenkins
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:41 am [Reply]

    RIP chicken lady from pluggers, I guess.

  51. Santa Royale With Cheese
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:42 am [Reply]

    JP: It’s not “can’t afford” in the financial sense, it’s “I can only get mixed up in wacky camera-erasing hijinx one customer at a time.”

    S-M: I already called time of death for this strip, which I suppose answers my would-be question as to why Spidey is standing around like a lamp-post instead of slinking off to the couch, and his understanding mistress, the television.

    Pluggers: Two things: A) Gotta love how the comic goes into “Doonesbury” mode and only shows the building where the action is taking place, not the “people” when meat-eating is involved, and B) who is mangling up fried chicken to the point of unrecognizability? This might have worked better if the line was “if you remember a time before chicken nuggets” but that probably squeezed out the coveted 14-26 demographic.

  52. Dan
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:43 am [Reply]

    Pluggers have a vague idea that fried chicken is in the news for some reason or another. Was it chicken? Maybe it was burgers. Pluggers get tired and confused sometimes. But remember when something Pluggers liked was more popular than it is now? Oh, yeah. Hello, comfort zone.

  53. Randy
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:44 am [Reply]

    A meal for $9 plus tip? Pluggers tip by leaving Chick tracts for the server (“Better ‘n money, any day!”).

  54. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:45 am [Reply]

    @Marc (#42): Regarding Delta’s “not a virgin” lips. One can only surmise that the experience was less than fulfilling for her. Definitely fodder for a “very special storyline!”

  55. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:47 am [Reply]

    9CL: Today’s strip makes it clear that she’s soloing up there, not just in the corps. You don’t get fired and then given a grand solo performance. I know it’s been said many times, but it just can’t be said enough. Also, Amos is such a dick. That look on his face, it makes me want to slap him as much as I want to slap Les Moore.

    Pibgorn: Yes, you mentioned that. Couldn’t he have just published this whole repeat-with-commentary in a print collection and sold it to those who cared? It just seems like a real cop-out to me that he repeats an entire year-plus story arc, but with commentary. It’s a way of taking a vacation from the strip without admitting that’s what you’re doing. You put in your 30 seconds per strip to write your pretentious drivel and you’re good to go.

    ASM: Parker/Spidey is real quick on the uptake! “Hey, whoa, maybe photojournalism isn’t a career with a bright future! Who knew?” I don’t know whether to give kudos for being willing to call in iPhone and iPhone, instead of making up something silly like “ePhone.” Or maybe I should be insulted at the blatant product placement — I’m really not, though, because none of those things being shoved into Jameson’s face looks anything like an iPhone.

    Ctrl+Alt+Del: Serious question. When did people who cook meth — even genius scientist meth pushers — become someone that people would want to emulate? I don’t understand popular culture.

    Girls with Slingshots: I bet Danielle Corsetto gets angry mail from goldfish lovers because of this.

    Pluggers: Because many pluggers are anthropomorphic chickens, that panel is a scene straight out of one of those gore-porn horror film.

  56. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:48 am [Reply]

    I got to see the “extra fluffy” Malamute pup last night. This dog looks like something out of anime, it’s just lovely and very odd. very long tail for a ‘mute as well, and it’s growing like a weed. Also got snuffled by the mutant ‘reverse brindle’ bulldog that lives with the Fluffymute, so it was a good night for dogs. :-)

  57. Calico
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:49 am [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#47):
    One of our work associates lives on a street by the same name down there – he mentioned once that Toad was a ferryman with said nickname who liked his bottle of likker, and he used to suck it down as he took people back and forth on his craft – hence the name in his honor.
    *Really*!

    It’s kind of like how “Squirrel Nut Zipper” got its name, but that’s a VT story : )

  58. Agoraphobic Turtle
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:52 am [Reply]

    You’re a plugger if you dismember a female’s body parts just so you can collect them and trade them with your friends. Wait, was that “plugger” or “psychopath”?

  59. S.Stout
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:52 am [Reply]

    Luann: Luann has had one boyfriend – for about an hour – and then he was deported. I’m not sure she should be giving advice on dating to anyone, unless it’s how to successfully cock tease.

    Ziggy: Does this imply that Ziggy cussed out the teller just moments ago? Where’s THAT Ziggy comic?

  60. NoahSnark
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:54 am [Reply]

    You’re a Plugger when that fried chicken you are eating used to be your neighbor.

  61. Sequitur
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:54 am [Reply]

    @Calico (#57): There’s nothing quite like enjoying your ride across the river with a drunken ferryman.

  62. Tophat
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:55 am [Reply]

    “On the bright side, at least we don’t have to feed the cats.”
    “Curtis!!”
    “What? Too soon?”

  63. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:00 am [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#47): “While they waited, they refreshed themselves at the local tavern there, to the dismay of the folks living nearby, who said: ‘They suck on the bottle ’til they swell up like toads.’ Hence, the name Toad Suck.”

    I have relatives in Arkansas, and I’ve been to Toad Suck (that’s a nice little park there). I never heard that expression before, though, and I call bogus. “Swell up like a toad”? Some local wag was japing the interviewer.

    // Tip. If you are ever at a bar, and you notice people swelling up like toads, it’s time to leave. Oh, have the bartender call a cab for you.

    // So this toad walks into a bar, and the bartender says, “Sorry, buddy, I can’t serve you. You’re already swelled up.”

  64. Anonymous
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:03 am [Reply]

    Curtis – The dead woman is actually Cayla’s aunt, who left Westview to try and avoid the cruel fate that befalls everyone who lives there. Sadly, you can take the girl out of Westview, but you can’t take Westview out of the girl.

  65. AhClem
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:04 am [Reply]

    @Anonymous (#64): #64 was me. Stoopid computers.

  66. Sequitur
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:06 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#63): I have heard the expression, “Bloats like a toad” but it had nothing to do with booze drinking. It was some gals talking about another gal who was retaining water.

    //I got to stop eavesdropping on conversations.

  67. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:06 am [Reply]

    Archie – Hey, I know! Archie says his horoscope says he’ll give of himself today, right? So in the last panel, Jughead should say, “Let us have gay homosexual sex!” Because then Archie will give of his body fluids! To Jughead! Unh! Score! I’ll bet I’m the only one to think of this brilliant idea.

  68. Mr. Manchineel
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:10 am [Reply]

    @Agoraphobic Turtle (#58): I can’t seem to face up to the facts,
    I’m dense and pond’rous from
    Too many snacks,
    I’ll smoke it bed till it’s on fire,
    Don’t tread on me, you elitist liar!

    Psycho Pluggers
    Qu’est Que C’est
    Bwak bwak bwak bwak bwak bwak bwak bwak bwak bwak
    Better stay stay stay stay stay stay stay away!

    Samples at Sam Club is our ‘free’ lunch,
    Deep-friend Snickers’ hot dogs — munch, munch, munch,
    When you serve me veggies, my lips are sealed,
    Unless they’re cooked in bacon grease, that shit ain’t real!

    Psycho Pluggers
    Qu’est Que C’est…

  69. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:13 am [Reply]

    @Calico (#57): @Nehemiah Scudder (#63): I’d believe some guy named Toad, first. Which brings us back to the name thing. If my last name was Suck, I might name my kid Toad, but probably not Richard.

  70. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:14 am [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#66): Truly, you have a dizzying intellect!

  71. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:15 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#67): And so does Muffaroo.

  72. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:15 am [Reply]

    Curtis – Don’t worry, kids. The cats will take care of the body. If you want to be absolutely sure it’s done right, give Gunk a call.

  73. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:17 am [Reply]

    Dennis – Joey TALKS.

    Creeped out now.

  74. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:18 am [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#61): In them days you had to take your entertainment where you found it.

  75. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:19 am [Reply]

    Hägar – Don’t be so sensitive! They would have thrown that tankard at your head even if you hadn’t been telling your stupid story. Nobody likes you.

  76. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:23 am [Reply]

    Mary – “…what was that THUD?”

    Pluggers – Pluggers gnawing on chicken wings keep an eye open and eat around the wedding ring.

  77. UncleJeff
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:24 am [Reply]

    MT: Given that Jackelrod frequently recycles background art, it’s probably a good idea that he doesn’t show Cherry’s computer. It’ll spare him some grief from CCers of the future who will make fun of the “antiquated” the computer the way kids make fun of Danny Glover and his bag phone in the first “Lethal Weapon” film.

  78. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:26 am [Reply]

    @JuneBizzle (#y390): By the way, has anybody ever seen a picture of Mallet?
    If you Google his name, there’s a slightly altered pic of Watterson. [*]

    @John C Fremont (#y395): I love me some mnemonics! Why, just the other day, in this very blog, I was using my own special mnemonic to remember the names of the planets.

    @Chyron HR (#12): MOMMY! THE CAT LADY DIED FOR NO REASON AT ALL!!
    She saw Curtis working. That shock would do most people in.

    @seismic-2 (#19): How will Curtis and Barry ever get paid by dead cat-lady?
    “Get me some pliers, Barry! This old biddy has got to have some gold fillings!”

  79. Ukulele Ike
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:27 am [Reply]

    @Marc (#42): “9CL- So monkeyface isn’t even bothering to look at the music?”

    There don’t seem to be any strings on the ‘cello, either.

    I assume Amos borrowed the instrument from the cellist who left, and not that he showed up with one under his arm. I personally don’t lend out my musical instruments. Do you guys lend out your instruments?

  80. Mysterious shirtless lawyer
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:30 am [Reply]

    You’re a plugger if you can remember when using the words “thigh,” “leg,” and “breast” in the same sentence gave you a hard-on.

  81. Voshkod
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:31 am [Reply]

    With week one of the Curtis cat lady saga coming to an end, let’s get a preview of the upcoming events through some very special quotes from Barry!

    Week two: “Curtis! The cats are eating her body!”

    Week three: “Curtis . . . the cats have finished eating her body.”

    Week four: “Curtis, the cats will now eat your body!”

    Week five: “Kill them, my feline army, kill them all!”

  82. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:33 am [Reply]

    @Ukulele Ike (#79): Not a chance that I would just leave one of my instruments with anyone other than a very close friend to let him sub for me.

  83. Anninyn
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:35 am [Reply]

    If the Lockhorns were the only example of marriage I had, I’d kill myself if someone proposed.

  84. Sequitur
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:38 am [Reply]

    @Mysterious shirtless lawyer (#80): Pluggers don’t have hard-ons. The have hard-to-get-ons.

  85. Bill Peschel
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:43 am [Reply]

    Luann: I’ll cut the artist slack on this. Delta may have unrealistic expectations, but they’re hers and she’s treating them seriously, so I’d cut her some slack. Those kind of people tend to get what they want anyway.

  86. cheech wizard
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:56 am [Reply]

    The cat lady dies, but Wilbur lives. Where is your God now?

  87. Mr. Manchineel
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:59 am [Reply]

    @Voshkod (#81): I very much support the idea of Curtis morphing into its own spin-off, “Cat-Master Barry and the World of Today.”

  88. UncleJeff
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:59 am [Reply]

    Curtis: Too bad she was a cat lady rather than a dog lady.
    Then we could’ve used Nick Lowe’s “Marie Provost” as a soundtrack.
    “She was a winner….who became her doggy’s dinner.”

  89. Horace Broon
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:03 pm [Reply]

    A3G: “A good agent is invisible. That’s why I want to work for an agency that I’ve just described as ‘big news’.”

    ASM: I’m not sure a professional photographer with a high quality camera is really at risk of losing his job to Joe Public’s cameraphone. On the other hand, I’m pretty sure Peter is.

    BB: This is true. At Walker-Browne LLC they play golf every day, and look how out-of-touch they are!

    JP: Last month (or possibly the month before; how long has this been going on?) I predicted that Sam and Avery would have a nice day’s fishing followed by a lovely dinner, and nothing remotely interesting would happen. Can I call them or what?

    MW: “It’s almost like we were never in any real danger at all!”

  90. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:05 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#55):

    Re: 9CL – He really should go back to having Amos just be a personality-free cypher who exists to service Edda. Today’s scowl, and this week’s “what a jerk!” reaction to the guy who did a favor for him make it clear that Amos is an asshole.

    However, being an asshole is alright as long as you are an asshole as part of your duty to worship a Burber woman.

    I always thought Seth and the other chinless, skinny women in tu-tus were dancers. I didn’t realize that they were all just stagehands for Edda’s one-woman dance recitals.

  91. Esther Blodgett
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:10 pm [Reply]

    @Mr. Manchineel (#68): I snorted coffee at “bwak bwak bwak bwak.”

  92. Esther Blodgett
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:16 pm [Reply]

    Curtis: All those cats and not a single one foretold her impending death?

    Luann: I thought that department was created during the Clinton administration. Thank you! Week! Veal!

    FW: It’s not surprising that someone who thinks a kitten could survive an international flight and a climb up Mt. Kilimanjaro also thinks dogs smile like that.

  93. Sequitur
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:21 pm [Reply]

    @Esther Blodgett (#92): re Curtis: Which brings up the question, how many death cats does one person need?

    //By the way, loved your “Uncrustables” blog.

  94. lynn
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:24 pm [Reply]

    Just got online and am posting without reading previous posts, but: I read Curtis this morning and I LOLed. Is that wrong? (“Dear Wendy…”)

  95. Liam
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:24 pm [Reply]

    Pluggers-Considering that one of the “characters” is a chicken today’s comic could either be construed as cannibalism or a Plugger orgy in a diner.

    MT-Chip? Download? Computer? Oh you women and your crazy made up words.

  96. Poteet
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:27 pm [Reply]

    9CL — By showing that he doesn’t need to look at the music even though he hasn’t been rehearsing with it, Amos indicates that he is perhaps almost maybe a worthy potential consort for the Goddess Edda, who is able to dance amazingly with her eyes closed. And surely when the strip said that Goddess Edda was “fired,” the intended meaning was that she is on fire with the divine essence that inspires her every movement. Your shrine is being made ready, O Goddess! Just working on some final touches to the multilayered bejeweled golden plinth!

  97. seismic-2
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:31 pm [Reply]

    RMMD: I love that look on Rex’s face as he contemplates the implications of Melissa’s complaining that even though she is filthy rich she now has no one to care for her, since her neice left. Tomorrow Rex will urge Melissa to draw up a new will, cutting out the ungrateful niece but remembering the medical professional who does listen to her complaints, and to buy herself a whole lot of cats.

  98. lynn
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:32 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#14): Oh, thank God, it wasn’t just me.

  99. Esther Blodgett
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:32 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#93): Thanks, Sequitur. The first step is admitting there’s a problem.

  100. Snarkotix Addict
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:33 pm [Reply]

    @ #85 Bill Peschel
    Yes, like Nola Wolverson. Delta, there’s Mary Worth in your future.

  101. Hibbleton
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:42 pm [Reply]

    FC: “Hey, Asshole! You like hollerin’ so much; get out in the yard and holler some air into our mattress!”

  102. Little Guy
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:44 pm [Reply]

    @Chyron HR (#12), Curtis: “Well, Curtis, if you’ve found the time to clean the litter boxes of some dead lady’s cats, perhaps you can flush out the apartment septic tank!”

  103. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

    ASM – Can’t wait for the new villain who targets JJJ. His name? Butch Wax.

    GT – Looks like I need to add a FLUB! sign to the SHANK! sign in my golf bag. Very helpful in the short game. Yes, I’ll be a hit in the country club bar post 18 holes. Assuming I’m alive or not badly injured.

    RMMS – Sandra is marrying Rufus? Rufus? How can Rex the dickhead resist making fun of that name when I can barely stop myself?

    LuAnn – It’s official. Teenage sex no longer exists. Meanwhile, how can I get a nomination for Secretary of Feeling People? I’m well rested and ready!!

    Grand Avenue – if Grandma reels in Old Hardy or Oscar the Scarface or any fish with a name, I will be calling for a full investigation into collusion within the comic industry. Yeah, I’m a fiscist.

  104. Sequitur
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:46 pm [Reply]

  105. Marc
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:46 pm [Reply]

    @Ukulele Ike (#79): I would never lend my musical instruments out to anyone. My empty glass jug and tissue box with rubber bands around it have far too much sentimental value for me to lend them out all willy nilly.

  106. Liam
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

    Marvin-Oh what a bleak and horrible future this is.

  107. Marc
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:49 pm [Reply]

    @Bill Peschel (#85): I think what Delta is doing is comparing herself to Ryan Lotche. She is just far too busy and driven to committ to a relationship. However she is all in on one night stands.

  108. Poteet
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:49 pm [Reply]

    @nescio (#33): Yes, this is one of the most nightmarish aspects of THE LOCKHORNS. They can never escape because they are surrounded by nothingness. Leroy can’t even walk to the other side of the room to get away from his loathed life-partner because there is no other side of the room because there are no walls or floor or ceiling. Run away, Pizza Boy, before the hazy front walk disappears!

  109. Snarkotix Addict
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:51 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#69): My first name is Richard. When I am introduced, sometimes someone will ask, “Do you mind if I call you Dick?” And I’m often tempted to say, “Only if you mean it.”

  110. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:52 pm [Reply]

    A3G – So, Evan, you gave up a job with plenty of visibility and no involvement? I’m afraid you’re too friggin’ stupid to work for the M&M Agency. Our Mission Statement is: Profiteering through Visibility without Involvement.

  111. Mr. Manchineel
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

    @Horace Broon (#89): You know the whole “a good agent is invisible” thing makes sense if you’re talking about super spies and secret agents, but if you’re talking about a talent or publicity agency, don’t you want them getting in people’s faces to get your name out there? I mean, Ari from Entourage was anything but “invisible.”

    @Esther Blodgett (#91): Yeah, that was probably the cleverest part of that whole thing.

  112. Poteet
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:55 pm [Reply]

    CURTIS — I hope she has made good arrangements for those cats so they don’t all end up at the shelter. One elderly woman in one Iowa town left all her money to charity but made no provisions for her cat and it did end up in the shelter and…um. Okay, this is CURTIS. Not real life. Just CURTIS. CURTIS. The odd kid with the hat. Calm down. Yes.

  113. Alter Ego
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:56 pm [Reply]

    DtM – Yep. Today we see Dennis blow his wad.

  114. Poteet
    August 8th, 2012 at 12:57 pm [Reply]

  115. Alter Ego
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:00 pm [Reply]

    love is… doing the same act you did yesterday, but from the rear this time.

  116. Voshkod
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:04 pm [Reply]

    @Mr. Manchineel (#87): Only if he teams up with the evil Doctor Horsehead.

  117. Baka Gaijin
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:07 pm [Reply]

    @Ranger (#6): COTW!!!!

    @Chip Whittle (#8): And I, for one, welcome our new squirrel overlords.

    @Chyron HR #12) on Pluggers: Ah ha ha HA! COTW!!!

    @Nekrotzar (#17): Nowadays, Pluggers sit around a trash can fire communally eating whatever whoever anyone happened to scrounge up that day, and hoping that tomorrow will be better. Fixed that for ya.

  118. Slug
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:09 pm [Reply]

    Dear funny pages:

    Did I need adult Marvin’s look of shock and introspection as he contemplated no longer wearing a diaper? No, no I did not.

  119. Sequitur
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

    @Slug (#118): That’s the trouble with the funny pages. You have to take what you get.

    And then you come here to get the funny part of the funny pages.

  120. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:18 pm [Reply]

    @Slug (#118): I think that look was more of a “Great. NOW he tells me.”

  121. Sequitur
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:21 pm [Reply]

  122. Liam
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:21 pm [Reply]

    MW-I can believe you guys are alive. You’re supporting cast members. No one would think of killing you.

  123. SurrealKangaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:25 pm [Reply]

    KFC serves recognizable pieces of fried chicken. I remember eating there a couple of weeks ago. Oh, God I’m a Plugger!
    Waaaahhhh!!! I need a hug!

  124. Dr. Moreau
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:26 pm [Reply]

    You’re a Plugger if you rail against nuggets, tenders and other chicken atrocities while conveniently ignoring the fact that you can enjoy easily identifiable fried chicken in restaurants all over the world, because NOTHING gets between a Plugger and his bitter, impotent rantings at a world that keeps passing him by. Not even a strip where the word balloons betray the entire premise of the caption.

  125. Baka Gaijin
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#54): Giant worm tail. ‘Nuff said.

    @Sequitur (#84): Ha ha ha. Pass the brain bleach.

    @Alter Ego (#113): That is a very clever comment. Disturbing but clever.

    @Dr. Moreau (#124): “Bitter” and “impotent” are pretty much the definition of “Pluggers.” Wait, add “morbid obesity” and you’ll be set.

  126. Artist formerly known as Ben
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:29 pm [Reply]

    Lockhorns: It’s the classic porn setup. I hope the pizza guy is in the mood for a threesome with mutually loathing oldsters.

    Pluggers: Henrietta misses the days when cannibalism was more personal and direct, when she could say, “Oh, this is Vivian’s wing,” or “Jed must have been working out, this leg is massive.”

    MW: I can believe they’re both alive, because I’m not sure even Wilbur would be caught dead in that jacket.

    WofI: Sadly for Sir Rodney he’s not in an actual Red Bull commercial, so he won’t be sprouting wings.

    C-Shaft: None too surprisingly, Crankshaft’s neighbors have money set aside for the express purpose of repairing the damage he does. As best they can, anyway.

    Archie: Look at these two guys and tell me they’re not waiting for johns to pick them up.

    BC: Tom Sawyer is your agent?

    Baldo: Entering the “great name for a rock band” sweepstakes…

    RMMD: “You say you need free labor. Have you thought about taking in the son of a drug addict?”

    H&L: If this makes you thirsty for Hi-C, the subliminal advertising experiment is going smoothly.

    GT: Wow, he actually got the “flub” sound effect. If there’s such a thing as achievement in failure, that’s it.

    6C: If you were about to ask, “Who do I have to blow for some service here?” now you know.

    DtM: So now Joey and Dennis are gum-married.

    Luann: Doesn’t it ever get stuffy in that closet, Delta?

    S-M: With this level of incompetence, it doesn’t take Steve Jobs to make you obsolete.

    S4th: Ah, looks like Jackie is awesoming up.

    Marvin: “And they were able to get us off to kindergarten right around age 10.”

  127. Artist formerly known as Ben
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:33 pm [Reply]

    @TheDiva (#29):

    Curtis: Their horror is not so much from being in the presence of mortality at such a tender age, but the knowledge that with their mistress dead, the cats now have free reign to wreak terror upon the world, starting with them.

    They need to call their friend Gunk in, pronto. If memory serves, he has a way with maneating feral cats.

  128. Santa Royale With Cheese
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#126):

    Lockhorns: It’s the classic porn setup. I hope the pizza guy is in the mood for a threesome with mutually loathing oldsters.

    I have a feeling that movie would be called “Who’s Afraid of Loretta Lockhorn?”

  129. Mr. Manchineel
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

    @SurrealKangaroo (#123): I tried to hug you, but my arms aren’t long enough, plus you smell like deep-fried wet dog.

  130. Peanut Gallery
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

    Today’s Hi & Lois is brought to you by the makers of Hi-C. It’s a natural tie-in.

  131. Chip Whittle
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

    Mary Worth: “We’re both alive! Or whatever you call it when you’re a character in Mary Worth!”

  132. Slug
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#120): Well that’s just worse. You just made me imagine 30-year-old Marvin learning a little too late that he wasn’t…

    Y’know what? I’m just gonna stare at the elephant violence in Slylock Fox until I forget.

  133. Liam
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:39 pm [Reply]

    Spiderman-Don’t worry Jameson is so cheap he won’t pay all those people for their pictures. Peter Parker will always have a job at the Bugle.

  134. yaoi huntress earth
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:41 pm [Reply]

    9CWL: I just can’t help looking at Amos’ face and thinking he’s eventually going to knife Edda over a fit of jealousy.

  135. Liam
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

    Curtis-Quick, Barry, let’s get out of here and leave the cats to eat her body.

  136. klaus tommy baggs
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:47 pm [Reply]

    Curtis: Clearly, Ray Billingsley knows nothing about cats. At the moment that old gal expired those cats would be gnawing off her nose and eyelids…and an anatomically correct rendering of that process would be infinitely preferable to whatever mediocrity Billingsley has in store for this To Kill A Mockingbird ripoff storyline.

  137. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:47 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#126): Baldo: Entering the “great name for a rock band” sweepstakes… Swing. That would be one of those “trumpet playing bands”.

  138. seismic-2
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:48 pm [Reply]

    A3G: “A good agent is invisible!!! That’s why I had to leave that firm – why, they even had a publicist who herself became bad publicity for her client, when his wife caught them kissing and she left him! There were stories about it in the papers! Can you even imagine??? Boy, was I ever glad to leave to leave such a bunch of bumbling amateurs!”

  139. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:49 pm [Reply]

    “A good agent is invisible.”
    In this comic, that means he wears light blue clothes to match his skin.

  140. Shrug
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:52 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug (#y203):

    Yesterday I said:

    “Wilbur daydreams of retiring to a “little vine-covered frottage.” ”

    and while fairly happy with it, I kept having the feeling I’d missed a chance for improvement. During a sleepless moment last night, it suddenly came to me that I should instead have said:

    Wilbur daydreams of retiring to a “little vein-covered frottage.”

    Fixed it for me. But now I need the brain bleach.

  141. lynn
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:53 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug (#140): You had to start this up again, didn’t you?

  142. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:53 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug (#140): And thanks for sharing!

  143. Artist formerly known as Ben
    August 8th, 2012 at 1:57 pm [Reply]

    @Horace Broon (#89):

    ASM: I’m not sure a professional photographer with a high quality camera is really at risk of losing his job to Joe Public’s cameraphone. On the other hand, I’m pretty sure Peter is.

    True that. Which would matter less to the Peter Parker of the books, for whom news photography was a way to make ends meet while he got an advanced science degree. When it’s just the Bugle and resentfully leeching off your wife, it’s another story.

  144. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:02 pm [Reply]

    So this frottage walks into a bar… No, that way madness lies…
    So this fromage walks into a bar, and the bartender says:

    1) What sort of cheesy place do you think this is?
    2) Sorry, we don’t serve food here.
    3) You look so sad! Yes, said the cheese, my name’s Roquefort.

    etc.

  145. Shrug
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:02 pm [Reply]

    @geekwhisperer (#31):

    Actually, Cherry was visiting APT 3-G last week and accidentally left the computer on top of their piano.

  146. The Spectacular Spider-Brick
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:03 pm [Reply]

    Disclaimer: Any resemblance between my snark on these real comic strips and my previous snark on fake strips is coincidental.

    A3G: “A good agent is involved and invisible. I was uninteresting and anonymous — not quite the same thing.”

    BB: I don’t care how many cell phones you own or how much you golf, you can’t get more out of touch than a Mort Walker comic strip.

    DT: GAAAH!!! Don’t DO that!!!

    H&J: In this case, I believe the correct response would be, “Sorry, my boyfriend would be jealous.”

    JP: Sam had better hurry up and finish that glass of Pop-Rocks, ’cause down in the engine room, the pot growers are listening to every word through that submarine voice pipe on the wall.

    Luann: Good idea, Delta. You can appoint Bill Clinton to run it.

    MW: They may be alive, but the left side of Wilbur’s face was an unfortunate casualty. During the excitement, the mayonnaise holding it on dried out, and it’s about to hit the dock with a *splat.*

    Ghost-Who-Isn’t-Afraid-To-Show-Areola: Panel 2 features the second-most-prominent nipple on the comics page today.

    Pluggers: “You’re a Plugger if you remember when you ate fried chicken at a restaurant and you could recognize what part of the bird you were eating.” There, fixed that for you.

  147. Baka Gaijin
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:08 pm [Reply]

    The center panel of Pooch Cafe sums up my attitude toward Wilbur and Dawn’s touching reunion. [*]

  148. Shrug
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:21 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#47):

    So why did “Climax, Georgia” make the top ten worst town names and “Climax, Minnesota” didn’t even get a mention?

    So. It has come to this.

  149. Girl Reporter
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:22 pm [Reply]

    MW: And so another plot ends not with a bang but a whimper.

  150. Mr. Manchineel
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:23 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug (#140):

    Fixed it for me. But now I need the brain bleach.

    Uhm, yeah. We used it all up yesterday. In fact, Brain Bleach futures went through the roof when the CHX opened this morning.

  151. Shrug
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:25 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#63):

    // So this toad walks into a bar, and the bartender says, “Sorry, buddy, I can’t serve you. You’re already swelled up.”

    And the toad says, “Well, that sucks.” Q.E.D.

  152. Dennis Jimenez
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:28 pm [Reply]

    A Plunger gets his hands on a breast or a thigh, by sticking dead presidents in a striper’s g-string….

    Curtis – Weill, what makes you say that? Berry – Well, otherwise I doubt if she’d just sit there while the cats ate her face….

    Ziggy – Oh, come now uppity Teller – that house is so far underwater that your credit analysis department refers to it as Ziggy’s SeaLab….

    Lockhorn’s – Stuffed in her bra – the last place Leroy’s peperoni grease covered fingers would ever venture….

    Adios Amigos, DJ.

  153. Shrug
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:32 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#96):

    ” Your shrine is being made ready, O Goddess! Just working on some final touches to the multilayered bejeweled golden plinth!”

    Clearly you are a good person. For most of the rest of us, our most common reaction to Edda is unplinthable.

  154. Jamoche
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:34 pm [Reply]

    @Marc (#42): 9CL- So monkeyface isn’t even bothering to look at the music?

    That’s forgivable, assuming he’s familiar with the music. What’s not forgivable is that he’s not looking at the conductor.

  155. Peanut Gallery
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:39 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#137):

    That would be one of those “trumpet playing bands”.

    They don’t give a damn about any of those. It ain’t what they call rock ‘n’ roll.

    (I’m getting deja vu now.)

  156. bbofun
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:41 pm [Reply]

    MW- “We’re both alive! I can’t believe it! “Neither can I! I would think, for dramatic purposes, it would be better if one of us had died, and the other would then have to deal with it! Hell, that could be a moving, touching story! But, nope, luckily for us, we’re established characters, so status quo is God! Do you guys have any sandwiches on this thing?”

    9CL- Gonna be “that guy” again- Amos is actually a member of this orchestra- he asked the other cellist if he could sub for him for the night. So, he probably has played this score, and rehearsed it. It seemed pretty obvious from the “Gilligan’s Island’ strip that they are colleagues, and he specifically asked to borrow his cello. So, yeah, all that’s covered. Similarly, Edda was fired, but this piece had probably been rehearsed previously with her in the role, and apparently the whole “pregnancy-care-fly-to-Europe-and-back-tell Amos-find-out-she’s-not-pregnant-botched-proposal-am-I-really-in-love-meet-old-crush-realize-yes-I-do-love-her” thing (GASP) was suppose to take less than a week’s time- probably only 3-4 days. So, the company wouldn’t have been able to replace her in the piece.

    Now, back to the snark-

    GT-Sometimes I wish I lived in comic-land, where everything I did would make the sound of what it was- kiss, hit, ring. But then I realize everyone nearby would know when I screwed up- FLUB, for example.

    Baa.

  157. Señor Tortilla
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:47 pm [Reply]

    Garf: Alright, I smiled.

    MT: Compare to Rusty, 2010. Facial reconstruction was generally a success, at least to Mark Trail standards.

    Marvin: “Well, actually behind closed doors…”

    RMMD: The second panel was really creepy, until the third panel. Arrrgh!!

    DT: “Buy yer balloons from a man with a horribly mutilated scrotum face! One dolla one dolla! Come on, kids, get yer lifelong psychic trauma here!”*

    S-M: Apple Inc. takes no responsibility for this.

    * sadly, that comment isn’t mine: it’s from Artist formerly known as Ben from 2011. But it’s still timeless.

  158. Shrug
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:47 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#147):

    And yesterday’s POOCH CAFE gave me a reasonable explanation for the existence of vastly-oversized giant animals in comic strips (the rooster turned out to be an undercover federal agent wearing a rooster suit). I’m now expecting various giant animals in MARK TRAIL to shed their costumes and reveal themselves as service personnel in the Lost Forest Outdoor Psychiatric Hospital (“Keeping An Eye On Deluded Nature Journalist Fetishest Loonies Since 1946″).

    See, reading POOCH CAFE gives you the tools you need to understand other comics.

  159. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:50 pm [Reply]

    Okay, Evan, when we talk about fitting in here at the M&M Agency we really mean it, so, like me, you must color coordinate your clothes to match the books and wall hangings in your office.

  160. Calico
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:54 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#61):
    I’d rather have Mr. Toad ferry me across than, say, have to listen to Chris DeBurgh’s “Don’t pay the Ferryman” ever, ever, again in my lifetime or beyond.

  161. This Guy
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:54 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#47): No mention for the various delightful towns of Lancaster County, PA, such as Intercourse, Paradise, Blue Ball, Bird-in-Hand, Mount Joy, and Lititz?

  162. pastordan
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:55 pm [Reply]

    Little known fact: the Lockhorns were both inspired by and the pattern for the marriage of George Jones and Loretta Lynn. Expect a drunk Leroy on a riding mower any day now.

  163. The Spectacular Spider-Brick
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:56 pm [Reply]

    @This Guy (#161): Not to mention Lickskillet, Ohio, Assateague, Va., and West Shitstain, Tenn. (Though I hear East Shitstain is absolutely lovely.)

  164. Calico
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:57 pm [Reply]

    @This Guy (#161):
    I’ve always loved the name of Truth or Consequences, NM. : )

  165. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:59 pm [Reply]

    Just as the young folk in Cloverfield felt they were safe as they flew over NYC in their rescue copter, so feel Dawn and Wilbur as their copterini banks over the stricken liner.

    It’s only then that they realize the Kraken is very very real. And, just as in Cloverfield, the monster raises up to….

    In the words of the immortal Mr Ed, “Poor Wilbur.”

  166. pastordan
    August 8th, 2012 at 2:59 pm [Reply]

    @UncleJeff (#88): Made up Internet points for knowing “Marie Provost.” The Jesus of Cool was one of the first albums I ever bought, way back when.

  167. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:00 pm [Reply]

    Not too far from where I live is a bump in the road called Sheds. I would love to build a mansion there.

  168. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:02 pm [Reply]

    @The Spectacular Spider-Brick (#163): OK, I’m calling BS on West Shitstain, TN! Lickskillet’s a real place, though!

  169. Calico
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:02 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#63):
    Re: Toad Suck again, yes, our associate/instructor said his wife is always rescuing feral cats from the park. God knows how many they have now-I’ll have to check in and see.

  170. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:07 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#168): Heh, there are actually two Lickskillets in Ohio. Neither of them terribly far from me.

  171. This Guy
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:09 pm [Reply]

  172. seismic-2
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:14 pm [Reply]

    @This Guy (#161): And of course there’s always Oxnard, CA.

  173. bats :[
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:19 pm [Reply]

  174. Baka Gaijin
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:23 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug (#158): And all this time I thought it was an entertaining comic strip about a dog and his dog friends.

  175. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:24 pm [Reply]

    @bbofun (#156):

    “Amos is actually a member of this orchestra- he asked the other cellist if he could sub for him for the night.

    The rest of your post I agree with, but I don’t think we ever established that Amos is part of the orchestra. Everyone was looking for him to be backstage, not in the orchestra pit. And as the reigning winner of the World’s Best Cello Player contest, I wouldn’t think he would be just a stand-in for someone else. Maybe I just don’t understand how this works – if he was a member of the orchestra and was regularly attending rehearsals, why would he have to take someone else’s place in order to be in the pit?

    @yaoi huntress earth (#134):

    This one is more clear. Knifing your partner in a fit of jealousy is a sign of true love, one that is even more pure than vomiting when you think of her or lying awake all night thinking up architectural metaphors for fucking her. Edda would never settle for a thrall that wasn’t so obsessed in love with her that he spends the few waking hours during which he isn’t busy servicing her lying around fuming with jealousy about that guy in the third row who was looking up her skirt and drawing sketches of what he saw.

  176. Mr. O'Malley
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:28 pm [Reply]

    MW: That’s nothing! I haven’t been able to believe this stupid shipwreck plot since it started!

  177. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#175): A pit orchestra is often a sub-set of an full orchestra. Amos may be in the orchestra, but may not have been on pit duty for this production. I suppose it’s possible that he was familiar with the music — either had played it previously or was on standby as a fill-in. Amos’s impromptu sub-in isn’t nearly as unbelievable as what’s going on on-stage.

  178. Slug
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:33 pm [Reply]

    Today’s Garfield… I can’t tell if it’s a throwback to the days when Garfield had an imagination, or if there was actually reason to suspect Odie’s flesh was being devoured by expired doggie treats. Either one is sort of funny, though, so I let it go.

    On an unrelated note, I probably need to change my handle. I keep getting mine and Shrug’s names confused.

  179. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:41 pm [Reply]

    @bbofun (#156): “So, the company wouldn’t have been able to replace her in the piece.”

    Typically what companies do in that situation is to be devious and sneaky. They wouldn’t fire her before the performance — because at that point how can they ensure she won’t just walk out and leave them hanging. Getting fired doesn’t inspire loyalty to the company.

    They’d wait until after the performance had its run, then say “We no longer require your services.” Or bump her from her featured spot back into the corps for the next production and hope she’d just quit on her own.

    Ballet’s pretty results oriented, I think — it may piss people off that you bailed on several rehearsals, but if you do the show, and everyone raves about you, then whoever’s managing the company will probably put up with a lot of your shit. There’s a reason the term “prima donna” (though meant for a singer, not a dancer) has the connotations it does. So it’s really not clear to me why they’d fire her. If she was just a random face in the corps, then yeah. They’re a dime a dozen and if they’re not going to show up and work their little feet til they bleed, then there’s a hundred standing in line to take their place. Also, with her newfound fame as a model, that’s even more good publicity for the company. Why throwaway free publicity?

    Which of course leads to the question of the bizarre desire of the Nicole Cignet execs wanting to fire her because she looked so great or something. Apparently everyone in the Burberverse is batshit insane. So I’m probably operating on false assumptions.

  180. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:44 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#177): Still, your point is well-taken. If Amos was a member of the orchestra that typically performs for that ballet company, then he’d be known to the backstage crew, and it’s doubtful that their security would have a problem letting him backstage. That was just a complication McE needed to happen, so it happened. For reasons.

  181. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:47 pm [Reply]

    @Shrug (#148): So why did “Climax, Georgia” make the top ten worst town names and “Climax, Minnesota” didn’t even get a mention?
    Is Climax, Colorado in there? Hah. Anyway, I lived in Georgia for a couple of years. Maybe the judges just figure everything’s worse there.
    To be fair, though, I’d put Athens, GA, on a short list of places that just seem extraordinarily nice, along with Boulder and Austin.

    I don’t see Gnaw Bone, IN, on there, either, but maybe I’m looking at the wrong list. (Must be: I see Intercourse, but no Climax.)

  182. sporknpork
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:47 pm [Reply]

    You’re a plugger if you can eat other patrons at a restaurant and not be considered a cannibal.

  183. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:48 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#180): Heck, I’ve gotten backstage on a production I wasn’t even involved in just by saying, “Oh, I’m a friend of Elanna’s.” The Pentagon, it wasn’t.

  184. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:49 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#183): Is there a name for the disorder that causes you to make serial replies to your own posts?

  185. 10 Dude Road
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:53 pm [Reply]

    There is no way a professional musician is going to lend their instrument to anyone at the drop of a hat. Especially Amos. He is not paying attention and is getting hot under the collar. A recipe for disaster for the poor cello.

    No way this would happen especially with string players. They are exceedingly weird and possessive. If a fire were to break out, they would save the viola and let their spouse go up in smoke.

  186. Baka Gaijin
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:58 pm [Reply]

    @sporknpork (#182): COTW-worthy!

    @Cloudbuster (#184): Narcissistic personality disorder. Hey, you asked.

  187. Artist formerly known as Ben
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:59 pm [Reply]

    @Señor Tortilla (#157): Thank you, Amigo Tortilla. Staton seems to have toned down the balloon-selling snitches grotesquerie since then, but it still gives you a jolt.

  188. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 3:59 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#186): Ow! That burns!

  189. The Spectacular Spider-Brick
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:03 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#170):

    Heh, there are actually two Lickskillets in Ohio. Neither of them terribly far from me.

    One of them, fairly close to Beaver.

  190. Greg K
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:05 pm [Reply]

    I’m pretty sure “Hey, where do you keep your coupons?” is Lockhorns’ code phrase for “You need to blow this guy”.

    They’ve probably both said it too.

  191. KreatureFeatures
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:06 pm [Reply]

    @Ned Ryerson (#26): Thank you.

  192. seismic-2
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:13 pm [Reply]

    @10 Dude Road (#185): In this particular case, though, it might actually make some sense for the Gilligan’s Island fanboy to lend his cello to Amos. Since Edda spent a big chunk of her modeling fee to buy an ultra-expensive cello for Amos as a gift, maybe the fanboy was doing the favor of lending his cello to Amos so that Amos would owe him one back, and then the fan-boy could borrow Amos’s ultra-expensive cello sometime.

    Yeah, right. As if Brooke ever needed a carefully thought-ought reason for any plot twist in this script, which he seems to improvise daily.

  193. seismic-2
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:19 pm [Reply]

    Although, of course, one has to wonder why the musicians sitting next to Amos in the orchestra pit haven’t yet asked him “Who the hell are you???” and reported him to the conductor, the stage manager, and the cops. So we have a cellist who doesn’t belong to the pit orchestra getting away with playing for a ballerina who gets away with dancing a solo performance, even though she’s been fired. That’s about the sort of entitlement that is to be expected for Brooke’s specialest snowflakes!

  194. lynn
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:23 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#184): echopostlalia. I have it, too.

  195. lynn
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:23 pm [Reply]

    @lynn (#194): Because who else is worth talking to, really.

  196. Dale
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:24 pm [Reply]

    @pastordan (#162):

    George and Tammy. Loretta and Moony (sp?).

  197. lynn
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:25 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#188): “Ow! That burns!” – in reference to BG, that’s what she said.

  198. lynn
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:26 pm [Reply]

    @lynn (#197): Or afterwards, possibly, that’s what said.

  199. lynn
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:27 pm [Reply]

    @lynn (#198): The word ‘he’ is missing there.

  200. lynn
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:27 pm [Reply]

    @lynn (#199): And it would have been so funny if I hadn’t messed it up.

  201. lynn
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:28 pm [Reply]

    @lynn (#200): The heartbreak of echopostlalia.

  202. Poteet
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:28 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#193): Thank you for reminding me that I need to engrave a few snowflakes on The Goddess Edda’s shrine!

  203. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:29 pm [Reply]

    As mentioned in some criss-crossing posts I was involved in last week, the wheels are in motion in 9CL, so toss your logic and reason out the window, not that you ever really need them for this mess.

    Amos’s glasses are on the end of his nose, which is McEldownese for “massive pheromone release in progress.”

    I’m imagining Edda pirouetting right on top of the crowds heads so she can make her way to Amos and resin up his bow?

  204. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:32 pm [Reply]

    @lynn (#201): In reference to what I just said, let me say this about that….

  205. lynn
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:35 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#204): Ah, I was once in love with a violinist, and you have no idea (or maybe you do, if you’re a lutanist yourself) how many risque remarks can be made re: the playing of a violin. You may note the voluptuous shape, for instance.

  206. lynn
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:36 pm [Reply]

    @lynn (#205): As my dear boy said, a violin is like a woman. If you stroke her gently, she makes a pleasing sound. If you treat her roughly, she shrieks. You have to see this demonstrated to get the full effect.

  207. tallyHO
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:38 pm [Reply]

    I haven’t read every comment so far but I’m going to go ahead and write this*:

    In Mark Trail, Cherry probably took “the chip” from Rusty, walked over to the computer, tossed it on the keyboard, watching it bounce off the keyboard and then picked the chip up and handed it back to Rusty.

    You just know that is what happened. It just wasn’t shown.

    *if someone else mentioned it, well, wow!

  208. Marc
    August 8th, 2012 at 4:43 pm [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#155): That’s exactly why Harry doesn’t mind if he doesn’t make the scene. He’s got a daytime job, he’s doing alright.

  209. bats :[
    August 8th, 2012 at 5:23 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#177): then again, I’m sure the Amos, having gone to Brussels for an international competition and all, is undoubtedly Special Snowflake, Cello Edition.

  210. sully
    August 8th, 2012 at 5:26 pm [Reply]

    See how the Lockhorns are hovering in some kind of ether-world, floating on a cheap graduated screen, with no gravity to speak of. And see how the poor pizza guy has been dispatched through a dark portal into their miserable dimension. And imagine how relieved he will be, once he returns to his own universe, tip or no tip, without being kicked in the sack by the Lockhorn’s lethally-sharp, over-sized feet.

  211. pastordan
    August 8th, 2012 at 5:31 pm [Reply]

    @Dale (#196): Dammit, you’re right. George and Tammy. Brain fart. I’d say it was a “senior moment,” but I know I’m not senior to half this board…

  212. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 5:44 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#184): Is there a name for the disorder that causes you to make serial replies to your own posts?
    We always called it ‘cloudbusting.’ When you came along with that name, we all looked at each other and snickered a little…

  213. Patrick, formerly of Interlibrary Loan Lending Division
    August 8th, 2012 at 5:46 pm [Reply]

    Wayback machine observations:

    A3G: I was helping a patron with a 1985 microfilm yesterday and came across the Alex Kotsky (sp?) version of Apartment 3G. Apparently, the present day residents of 3G must have suffered a temporal distortion/alternate timeline event that caused the 1980′s to never happen because in the 1985 strips I saw on film, Apt. 3G was set clearly in the 1980′s with all of the typical hair and fashions of the time and Tommie had absolutely no fear of Margo. I don’t remember the exact date, but I saw a panel where Tommie was yelling at Margo to get out of bed. Margo did not smite her for the transgression, nor looked to be in any condition to do so. If I remember correctly the films were from Nov-Dec 1985.

    Mary Worth: I had no idea it was possible but Mary Worth was drawn even worse than it is now. The characters were recognisble only if you stare at them long enough to figure out who they are. Reading the dialogue wasn’t much help. Chinbeard appeared to have gotten the worst of it.

    Rex Morgan: Amazingly the same in a good way as far as the drawing goes.

    All the other legacy strips: These things must be completely automated. No living human being could bear the mindcrushing monotony.

  214. Peanut Gallery
    August 8th, 2012 at 5:50 pm [Reply]

    @lynn (#206): Then there’s Jack Benny’s violin playing. As Professor LeBlanc put it: “The strings on a violin are made of cat gut. And the violin bow is made from horse hair. So if you want to know how Monsieur Benny’s violin playing sounds… think of a cat being stepped on by a horse.”

  215. Cloudbuster
    August 8th, 2012 at 6:00 pm [Reply]

  216. Liam
    August 8th, 2012 at 6:11 pm [Reply]

    MT-You don’t need to download the pictures to see the poachers they’re right there lurking in the bushes.

    A3G-The title doesn’t matter but how about the position. Margo has lots of positions that she thinks you can fill.

    MW-And we didn’t even have to eat any of the other passengers either.

    Blondie-Actually the mailman wanted to be a muff diver but they didn’t have any muffs.

    Beetle Bailey-Sadly General you are already out of touch.

    Love Is-Turning off the GPS and accidentally driving off the Aldo Kelrast Memorial Highway.

  217. Liam
    August 8th, 2012 at 6:20 pm [Reply]

    Ziggy-Ziggy would be happy for you to take his house. There’s nothing but bad memories in it.

  218. tallyHO
    August 8th, 2012 at 6:26 pm [Reply]

    With Ziggy:

    Here’s what happened before that panel:

    Ziggy, a short, gnome-like man walks up the bank teller without any pants of shoes on.

    That’s what happened.

    Not that I’m defending her onerous reaction, mind you. We just don’t know if Ziggy struts his stuff or if he goes for the grand entrance.

  219. Horace Broon
    August 8th, 2012 at 6:33 pm [Reply]

    @Mr. Manchineel (#111):

    Yeah. I think the idea is meant to be that a good agency gets your name out there, not their own, and the best publicity is when people don’t realise your image is being engineered. Not that I’m inclined to think Margo’s agency does this; we all remember how artificial the Mills Gallery opening was, and I’m sure Scott Gaines is known throughout New York as “that guy who hired Margo Magee as his publicist”. (“May God have mercy on his soul” optional).

  220. Doyle
    August 8th, 2012 at 6:52 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#175): I thought that Amos went to New York City to become a student at Juilliard, and Edda went to NYC to join a ballet company. They both graduated early and skipped their senior year of high school. As far as I know, Amos hasn’t joined any professional orchestra.

  221. demoncat
    August 8th, 2012 at 6:59 pm [Reply]

    mw neither can the rescue workers believe dawn and wilbur survived espiclly wilbur who looked like he was going to have a heart attack on the lift. but proof that no one dies unless Mary worth gets to kill them. Curtis. curtis mind is racing on how to come up with an explanation of how best to tell his foks that the cat lady crooked and they found the body after he takes a big tip for trauma of her passing.from her purse

  222. Poteet
    August 8th, 2012 at 7:11 pm [Reply]

    @Doyle (#220): At some point they both went to Belgium to bonk. I remember that much.

  223. Zerowolf
    August 8th, 2012 at 7:25 pm [Reply]

    RMMD: And this is what a male meddle-gasm looks like.

  224. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 7:33 pm [Reply]

    The “hedge fund” joke in Crankshaft is so lame that I’ve had a tough time coming up with a smartass remark, just as sure as my name is IRA KEOUGH…blahaha

    JP – You have everything you need to be successful, superb fishing, rustic lodge, great location and the most luscious set of knockers I’ve seen in years.

    MT – So if we downloaded the pictures of the poachers, why are we telling the warden what we saw and not showing him? I guess there’s only so many details that can be updated from 1960. I’m surprised they’re not calling each other Dale and Dusty.

  225. This Guy
    August 8th, 2012 at 7:37 pm [Reply]

    I don’t know why I’m about to talk about 9CL again, but…

    It doesn’t track with Brooke’s worldview that one of his oh-so-precious protagonists would join an… ensemble. And have to blend in with the sound of other musicians. No, Brookie’s author avatar would only play unaccompanied solos. He might condescend to play a cello concerto, provided that he gets to silence the orchestra at will and play a two-hour cadenza. The beefwits, looters (*), and parasites (*) of the world’s orchestras could never hope to match the sublime talent of one of the Chosen Ones.

  226. Prof. Ian Cameron
    August 8th, 2012 at 7:45 pm [Reply]

    Baldo: “Fart hydraulics,” my ass!!!

  227. Dale
    August 8th, 2012 at 8:05 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#224):

    MT – Rusty saw an airplane kill a bighorn sheep. He has pictures of some guys butchering a dead sheep. Same sheep? He left the scene to get the telephoto lens. He didn’t see who killed the sheep. Two hunters find a dead sheep, don’t let it go to waste.

    He needs Mark to forge a solid chain of evidence. GFL.

  228. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 8:16 pm [Reply]

    @Dale (#227): I think you are applying perfectly reasonable logic that in no way, shape or form exists in the totally random, disjointed world of the Trailmix clan.

  229. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 8:20 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#224): So if we downloaded the pictures of the poachers

    The camera with the chimera has the pictures of the poachers, but the chap who holds the chip has got the goods on the goats!

  230. Danny K.
    August 8th, 2012 at 8:20 pm [Reply]

    By George, he’s got it!

  231. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 8:24 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#229): Are you telling me that the quick brown Rusty jumped over the lazy dead sheep?

  232. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 8:26 pm [Reply]

    @Danny K. (#230): Danny K wasn’t in My Fair Lady.

  233. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 8:28 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#229): Muff, I’m pulling that chant from Singing In the Rain. Gene Kelly and Donald O Conner…..right?

  234. Der Schnärkïnätör
    August 8th, 2012 at 8:33 pm [Reply]

    @NoahSnark (#60):

    Or your plugger wife…

  235. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 8:51 pm [Reply]

  236. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 8:59 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#235): Well linked, O Anagrammatic One! I don’t get much out of Danny Kaye in general (well, maybe in SPECTER GENERAL), but I do enjoy me some COURT JESTER.

  237. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:01 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#236): In truth, those are the only two movies of his I really like, but he’s great in them!

  238. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:06 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#237): Yeah, Danny Kaye was a forebearer to Robin Williams. A little bit can go a long way.

  239. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:10 pm [Reply]

    I got it!!

    Moses supposes his toeses are roses, but Moses supposes erroneously…

  240. UncleJeff
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:14 pm [Reply]

    @bats :[ (#173): THAT is gonna be an all-time Rex Classic for repeated usage.

  241. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:14 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#184): @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#212): Hey, Cloudbuster, try using an anagram of your handle for comments to yourself. That’s what I do, and no one suspects a thing!

    // How about “Drub Eco Lust”?

  242. A Smirch Unheeded
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:16 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#241): The Rev. Scudder is right, as usual!

  243. Ride Dem Haunches
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:18 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#241): COTW, right there!

  244. Calvin's Cardboard Xob
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:21 pm [Reply]

    @Ride Dem Haunches (#243):

    Well, that is all well and good, but what about those of us who suck at anagrams?

  245. Calvin's Bardcoard Box
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:22 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Xob (#244):

    Yes! What about us?

  246. S'lavinc Cardboard Box
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:24 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Bardcoard Box (#245):

    I agree with Calvin!

  247. Zeach
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:24 pm [Reply]

    @Chaze (#239): Now I have an outlet for my schizophrenia!

  248. Achez
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:25 pm [Reply]

    @Zeach (#247):me too!

  249. Lateral Pen Guy
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:27 pm [Reply]

  250. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:27 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Xob (#244): Hey, welcome aboard, newbie! Don’t worry, you’ll get the hang of it.

    // So this Xob walks into a bar, and the bartender says: “Fart Hydraulics?”
    // I got a million of ‘em.

  251. Achez
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:29 pm [Reply]

    I have a question. I am watching The Nerdist right now reviewing Comic Con while I am posting on this site.

    Can I be saved?

  252. y’all HOT
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:29 pm [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Bardcoard Box (#245):

    Telegram!

    Telegram from who?

    Anagram!

    Anagram who?

    Ana Graham walks into a PR shop to apply himself at all the jobs available at
    50 Shades of Margo!

  253. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:30 pm [Reply]

    @Achez (#251): Yeah….ahem….me too.

  254. tallyHO
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:31 pm [Reply]

    @y’all HOT (#252):

    Third base!

  255. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:32 pm [Reply]

    @Achez (#251): @Chaze (#253): You guys should get together, maybe you can start a support group…

  256. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:34 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#255): Cool! We’ll make sure to invite our creator Chaze126.

  257. Carbon Cravid's Bald Box
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:37 pm [Reply]

    Wow, lotta newbies in here!

    Long time reader, first time poster!

    Did anyone notice that Marmaduke looks like some kind of demon, and can often be interpreted as such?

    Just throwing that out their….

  258. Dartpaw86
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:38 pm [Reply]

    Pluggers: Henrietta Beak calls Cannibalism on that!

  259. Carbon Cravid's Bald Box
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:40 pm [Reply]

    @Carbon Cravid’s Bald Box (#257):

    “there” of course, not “their”! I would never mistake the spelling of too homophones like that! You can ask all my friends – they will all agree that I am quite the homophonophobe!

  260. Zhace
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:42 pm [Reply]

    @Carbon Cravid’s Bald Box (#257): the Dooooooook! Funny strip, man.

  261. tallyHO
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:43 pm [Reply]

    huh.

    50 Shades of Margo was released by K-Tel (do tell, you say)

    It featured such hits as:

    A Head For 50 Smogs

    50 Adages From Hos

    He Goofs 50 Drama, She Goofs 50 Drama

    A Head for 50 Smogs II: Electric Boogaloo

    and 46 more great hits from Abigal “Tommie” Whatshername and the Aryan Gaspful Choir.

    And there’s more! If you order now, you’ll get a book of helpful hints from by the great gobsmacked guru:
    Mistopher Trendy.

    Where he shares his pearls of Wi’domizing, like:

    “Ah cain’t stop skankin’, Ma! I poss’ssed by the ghost o’ Bob Marley! Hyunk! Least I ain’t re-poss-ssed by the revenoo’ers! May we all lives life on the beach and not get crabs!”

  262. Droopy Says
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:46 pm [Reply]

    @Dale (#227): But can you forge a chain out of gum wrappers?

  263. [Damn ol\'] Forum Oaf
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:48 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#237): That’s pretty much how I feel, but I’m so fond of HOLIDAY INN I’ve learned to endure his mugging and ticcing. And I’ve learned to put up calmly with such Berlin misfires as “Snow! Snow! Snow! [etc],” “Choreography,” and the worst of all, “What Do You Do With a General?”

    In other news: 40 minutes until the clam dip in the fridge is ready to eat.
    39 minutes, 50 seconds.

  264. Peanut Gallery
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:48 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#229): Right! But there’s been a change. The goat was no good. Instead, they snagged a snap of a sheep. So the chump who holds the chip has the pictures of the poachers; the camera with the chimera has the snap of the sheep!

  265. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:48 pm [Reply]

    @Achez (#251): Further referencing The Nerdist, Matt Mira is a deadringer for a young Wilbur.

  266. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:48 pm [Reply]

    Preview is my enemy.

  267. Slug
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:56 pm [Reply]

    @Carbon Cravid’s Bald Box (#257): That’s probably my favorite one of Josh’s characterizations. The best part is, the Marmaduke writers are so asking for it.

    I’m a relative newbie myself. Nice to meet you!

  268. y’all HOT
    August 8th, 2012 at 9:56 pm [Reply]

    From Mistopher Trendy’s Quotes and Anecdotes for Survivin’ On a Limited Educashun:

    So I was a shoutin’: Lukey! Lukey!

    I went from the front porch then from room ta room. Where was my best fren, Lukey? That’s when I done open the bedroom door and there he was, atop a my wifey.

    I said, Lukey, what are you doin’ wif my womin.

    He had the look on his face, the look of a man caught in the middle of squeezing a pig and expecting free bacon only to find out it don’t work that way. Besides, that would take some work and that there’s uncharacteristic for Lukey.

    So I asked him again what he was a doin’.

    Lukey replied sayin, I gots tired playin’ mah fiddle. So, I chose to take up the squeezbox.

    Well, I was gobsmacked as usual cuz Lukey’s got a way with the words. After I done wiped my mouf o’ the drool, I said, If’n ya wanna get ta Carneggy Hall, you better practice, practice, practice.

    ‘Bout then, I cocked my shotgun and said, cuz I’m a good aim. You best gets a runnin’!

  269. Chaze
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:07 pm [Reply]

    Where have you gone, Fearless Fosdick?

  270. HAnzMFG
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:22 pm [Reply]

    Lockhorns alone must produce enough cases of depression to keep pharmaceutical businesses alive. Every character looks like they’re ready to just end it all in a few more moments

  271. yaoi huntress earth
    August 8th, 2012 at 10:30 pm [Reply]

    @This Guy (#225): It makes me wonder if Brooke is an Ayn Rand fan.

  272. Barge Redneck
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:33 pm [Reply]

    So this anagram walks into a bra…

  273. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 8th, 2012 at 11:56 pm [Reply]

    @Barge Redneck (#272): So this anagram walks into a bra…

    And Rather Bent Ed says, you know this isn’t a gay bra, don’t you?

  274. Nehemiah Scudder
    August 9th, 2012 at 12:03 am [Reply]

    So this anagram walks into a bra, and the ratbender says, “The Scrota Sitar!”

  275. Roll 'Em, Yam
    August 9th, 2012 at 12:21 am [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#264): Oh dear. My wife starts to look at me with a beady eye when I suddenly start chuckling sitting all by myself.

  276. Ken Crab Edger
    August 9th, 2012 at 12:22 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#274):
    So this anagram walks into a bra, and the ratbender says, “Now I know how the elf grips Milt.”

  277. A Smirch Unheeded
    August 9th, 2012 at 12:25 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#274): As a musician, I have no problem lending my ukuleles, my banjo, my guitars to close friends. But my scrota sitar, well, that’s very special.

  278. Droopy Says
    August 9th, 2012 at 12:27 am [Reply]

    Spider-Bland: After laughing his ass off at Spiderman, one of the robbery victims decides that Spiderman is a hero. Yep, it’s an odd-numbered day today.

    Funky Whosawhatsa: Two historic firsts for FW: Someone looks at Cancerville and calls it beautiful, and someone else answers with a fully-justified smirk. Meanwhile, Buddy prepares to end it all by jumping.

    Jugs Parker: Avery, you dork, you’re inside. Take off the sunglasses.

    Mary Mirthless: You call that a knee? You call that bleeding? You call Wilbur’s passionate denials foreshadowing of gangrene and amputation?

    Family Circus: Dolly, Mommy said that because she looked at you and remembered why angry make-up sex is no substitute for dispassionate logic.

    Pluggers: Plugger theology is subtly pretentious in its belief that Pluggers have souls.

    Mark Trail: So the bad mens hiked in with an old Ford pick-up, which wasn’t able to outrace a kid on a horse . . . a kid who’s so challenged that he’s now taking photographs with a camera that doesn’t have a “chip” . . . a kid who obviously wouldn’t be alone on that ranch . . . and to top it off, the bad mens think they are in luck to have found Rusty. I hope they brought along the bighorn’s head, because they need all the fresh brains they can get.

  279. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 9th, 2012 at 12:27 am [Reply]

    @Ken Crab Edger (#276): FAR FROM UNI!!!

  280. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    August 9th, 2012 at 12:30 am [Reply]

    Curtis: Now I know where those bullies that Gunk turned into cats ended up…

  281. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    August 9th, 2012 at 12:33 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#279): ps:

    Bill: Uh oh, here comes our friend, Bullwinkle J. Moose.
    Homer: Heh heh heh, Bullwinkle’s antler sprung a leak.
    Bill: Uh oh, looks like ol’ Bullwinkle’s kinda gotten a taste of his own medicine. Ha ha.
    Marty: He certainly does, Bill.
    Bill: Ha ha. Wait, what did… Did what I say make sense?
    Marty: Well, no, not really Bill.
    Bill: Boy, now I know how the pilgrims felt.
    Marty: What are you talking about, Bill?
    — Watching the Thanksgiving Day parade, “Bart vs. Thanksgiving”

  282. Prof. Ian Cameron
    August 9th, 2012 at 12:39 am [Reply]

    Someone may already have posted this, since it came out maybe 2 or 3 days ago, but if so, I missed it: a story on Ray Billingsley and his work on Curtis. Unfortunately, there were no quotes from Cuss Skunk.

  283. Poteet
    August 9th, 2012 at 1:18 am [Reply]

    MW — If that’s his knee, I really don’t want to know where his crotch is.

  284. Poteet
    August 9th, 2012 at 1:19 am [Reply]

    JP — Why are we suddenly looking at Avery in that last panel? It’s not as if looking at him is a pleasure.

  285. Poteet
    August 9th, 2012 at 1:26 am [Reply]

    FW — WOW. I don’t have a dog, so I’m asking Mudges who do. Is the action portrayed in this strip as stupid, selfish, and dangerous as it seems to me, or am I overreacting? I’m serious. I don’t know. I’d never EVER do that to a cat even if the cat were in a carrier and the carrier were securely fastened to the seat, but maybe dogs are different. Offhand, my reaction is that if you’re so impaired that you can’t ride a ferris wheel without putting your dog in a very hazardous situation, just stay off the damn ferris wheel. But maybe I’m being unfair.

  286. Poteet
    August 9th, 2012 at 1:33 am [Reply]

    A3G — This guy is “shy” kind of in the same sense that Carol Burnett was “shy” in ONCE UPON A MATTRESS, only Carol was highly talented, extremely appealing, and didn’t inspire a strong hope that she would be thrown out of a high window as soon as possible.

  287. Poteet
    August 9th, 2012 at 1:37 am [Reply]

    RMMD — Ick. I definitely miss the old Melissa now. If she would just come back, I wouldn’t say another word about the bun.

  288. This Guy
    August 9th, 2012 at 2:11 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#281): “And there’s Funky Winkerbean! Over here, Funky!”

    // Yes, I know that’s a different episode.

  289. Slug
    August 9th, 2012 at 2:14 am [Reply]

    Gosh darnit, something in me actually finds Mr. and Mrs. Marvin’s casual attitude towards time travel to be sorta charming. Good thing it all comes crashing down when the strip gets to one of its trademark non-punchlines.

    Does Marvin Jr. actually exist, or did 30-year-old Marv make him up to pretend he had accomplished something?

  290. Slug
    August 9th, 2012 at 2:24 am [Reply]

    Also, today’s Curtis makes me honestly sad. I used to take care of an old lady and help her around the house.

    Seriously Curtis. Never hit close to home again. It feels gross.

  291. Dale
    August 9th, 2012 at 2:27 am [Reply]

    @Chaze (#231):

    Quick? Rusty is certifiably short-bus slow.
    I keep asking whether that’s the writer’s intent.

  292. Dale
    August 9th, 2012 at 2:34 am [Reply]

    @Droopy Says (#262):

    MT -

    I think people do make chains out of gum wrappers.
    In this case, Mark will need something really substantial – pancakes and congealed syrup.

  293. Dale
    August 9th, 2012 at 2:56 am [Reply]

    @Droopy Says (#278):

    MT -

    I try to rationalize a lot of these things, because Elrod won’t in spite of all the repetition.
    Highest priority – get the trophy.
    There’s no way they would have walked in. But that doesn’t mean they used the pickup truck.
    Their business plan sucks. Fly around an unknown area until they see a bighorn sheep, elk, moose, grizzly bear, Sasquatch. Kill it. Return the plane to home base. Return to kill site, hoping to find the dead animal in good shape, at least for a dead animal. Do this while unseen and having a ready buyer.

  294. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    August 9th, 2012 at 3:08 am [Reply]

    Pibgorn commentary: “I claim no pending patent on the usufruct of cartoon borders as props up against which my characters can… well… prop themselves.”

    F*ck, but that’s an ugly bastard of a sentence.

    @Poteet (#285): No, I agree. It’s not only cruel to the dog, it looks bloody dangerous to me (what if the dog freaked out so badly he caused the chair to swing, or himself or one of the people to fall out, or bit someone because he was afraid?) and I can’t imagine any ride operator would let that take place.

    It’d be one thing if this was one of those strips where the animals have thought bubbles and are shown as sentient, but it isn’t. This is just whack.

  295. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    August 9th, 2012 at 3:15 am [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#294): I mean, good god, man, learn what words mean. “Usufruct” is not merely a fancy way of saying “use.” It’s a specific term referring to the right to use something. It’s also not something that can be patented. It can be granted, or transferred, or claimed, but not patented.

    Argh, rage, stomp.

  296. Prudynce
    August 9th, 2012 at 4:40 am [Reply]

    Apparantly, you’re a plugger if you eat at Kentucky Fried Chicken.

  297. Liam
    August 9th, 2012 at 5:35 am [Reply]

    FC-Let’s go to any VA Center and military cemetery tell the people there that.

  298. Filthy Horson
    August 9th, 2012 at 6:00 am [Reply]

    Curtis: Still waitin’ for Dad to give Barry emphysema so Billingsley can collect another award from the American Lung Association.

    Dick Tracy: Uh…remind me never to piss of Sam Ketchem.

  299. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    August 9th, 2012 at 6:42 am [Reply]

    9CL – OK, Alanis, but that isn’t really what “irony” means. “Facetious” would be more apt. What’s wrong, are the pages of your Thesaurus finally starting to stick together?

  300. Cloudbuster
    August 9th, 2012 at 6:50 am [Reply]

    @Calvin’s Cardboard Box (#299): It’s the good advice, that you just didn’t take!

  301. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    August 9th, 2012 at 6:55 am [Reply]

    9CL – It’s like a million tenons, when all you need is a mortise!

  302. Cloudbuster
    August 9th, 2012 at 6:59 am [Reply]

    Luann: OK, just learned in the comments over at gocomics.com:

    She has Hodgkin’s Lymphoma – diagnosed in early 2000’s and a low Stage form of the disease. Right now it’s in submission, but the threat of it returning is very valid. Thus, true she loves guys and such, but prob doesn’t want to put them through the pain of not being with one for a good lifetime knowing that her cancer can return and this time, be fatal.

    She’s doing her best to forget the disease, but it’s still very real in her mind.

    Seriously? Was Evans feeling shown up by Batiuk at the time and went all “Yeah? I SO can do cancer too!” The timeline matches up.

  303. Peanut Gallery
    August 9th, 2012 at 7:43 am [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#295): “Okay, class, who can use the word ‘usufruct’ in a sentence? Yes, Jar-Jar?”

    “Mistopher Brooke, usufruct up!”

  304. Vince M
    August 9th, 2012 at 7:55 am [Reply]

    @This Guy (#288): It would have to be a really old episode. There just isn’t that much helium.

  305. LP2004
    August 9th, 2012 at 8:05 am [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#295): There was a great article posted yesterday on Slate about a writing seminar the late Judith Crist taught at Columbia. Her class was limited to eight students per semester, was highly sought-after, and was not for the faint of heart. Apparently, her critiques of students’ writing could be brutal.

    Too bad she isn’t around to eviscerate McEldowney’s Pibgorn commentaries.

  306. Calico
    August 9th, 2012 at 8:42 am [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#261):
    Thankee for the morning’ guffaws, Paw!

  307. Calico
    August 9th, 2012 at 8:48 am [Reply]

    @y’all HOT (#268):
    Haw haw, Cletus would be proud.
    More caramelized squirrel brains for everyone, mule!

  308. Slug
    August 9th, 2012 at 5:01 pm [Reply]

    Garfield- Jon wasn’t invited to Mrs. Feeny’s funeral.

    Luann- Unrealistic as this strip may be, Luann’s philosophy of “everyone should be a man-chasing hormonal like me” reminds me of my peers. My awful, awful peers.

    Slylock Fox- Oh, yeah, buddy. That’s Nair all right.

  309. Slug
    August 9th, 2012 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

    @Slug (#308): …As usual, I had two tabs open and commented on the wrong day’s post. Ignore me, people, I’m not very good at this.

Comments are closed for this post.