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Funky Winkerbean, 6/6/15

In a touching gesture, one of Les’s fellow reunion organizers took from him the burden of putting together the “Gone But Not Forgotten” display. Because if there’s one thing Les doesn’t like to do, it’s dwell on the memory of his dead wife! Oh, hey, why don’t we add the book Les wrote about his dead wife’s death to the display. Say, do you suppose anyone wrote a book about the death of poor dead Livinia Jessup? No? Oh well, guess she probably didn’t die as movingly! I mean, do we really even need her picture there at all?

Dennis the Menace, 6/6/15

Significantly more menacing things Dennis could’ve said:

  • “You’re a grown man with a wife and a long, productive career behind you, and the possession you prize above all others is a poster that you clearly bought at a store somewhere and that has no actual historical connection to Daniel Boone?”
  • “If this is your most prized possession, why do you have to keep it up here in the attic?”

Shoe, 6/6/15

“This body is a repulsive husk, a meat-prison that I dream every day of escaping. KILL ME AND SET ME FREE, I BEG OF YOU”