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The false idol of the self

B.C., 6/4/05

So Generic Caveman Guy Whose Name I Don’t Care To Look Up wonders if God Almighty has a sense of humor. But then he notes the waddling presence of That Short Hairy Dude Whose Name I Am Actively Avoiding Looking Up, and realizes that any God who would create such a thing must have a sense of humor indeed!

Except the short hairy dude wasn’t created by God. He was created by Johnny Hart. Do you know what this means? That’s right: Johnny Hart thinks that he has a sense of humor! The horror.

41 responses to “The false idol of the self”

  1. Carol
    June 7th, 2005 at 9:40 am [Reply]

    Wait…doesn’t it first mean that Johnny Hart thinks he’s God?

  2. daChipster
    June 7th, 2005 at 9:44 am [Reply]

    That’s ridiculous, Carol, everyone knows Stevie Wonder is god.

  3. Dexter
    June 7th, 2005 at 9:46 am [Reply]

    This was a very clever observation, Josh. It’s also nice to see that I’m not the only Richard Jenni fan on this website, daChipster.

  4. TMC
    June 7th, 2005 at 9:46 am [Reply]

    Even more shocking, the second panel is almost completely devoid of background birds.

    Great site by the way. Found it yesterday and I’ve been catching up on the archives since.

  5. Nom du Jour
    June 7th, 2005 at 9:52 am [Reply]

    But, if you subscribe to the theory of scientific creationism, EVERYTHING is created by god. So, Johnny Hart was created by god. Johnny Hart created Grog (the short hairy dude). So, god did create Grog. god also created senses of humor, but did not necessarily give them out evenly. I think that Johnny Hart traded his in for a 1982 K-Car.

  6. fuzzmaster
    June 7th, 2005 at 9:52 am [Reply]

    That furball, Grog, is supposed to be a less-evolved person … wait a minute. Less evolved? So God’s sense of humor wasn’t to create a weird-looking guy; it was to plant phony evidence of evolution to fool future scientists. It all comes back to the same thing for Hart, doesn’t it?

  7. Anne Nonymous
    June 7th, 2005 at 9:53 am [Reply]

    Hey, Chip, big congrats on winning COTW! We love you, man!

  8. daChipster
    June 7th, 2005 at 9:55 am [Reply]

    As much as it pains me to admit it, Dex, I have no clue who Richard Jenni is. So I’m very much afraid you might well be his only fan here.

  9. Preciously_Odd
    June 7th, 2005 at 9:55 am [Reply]

    Off-topic, but has anyone ever mentioned the Family Circus website in here? To Keane’s credit, he at least maintains an appropriate air of humility by presenting a collection of all FC shout-outs in other comics. There’s a lot of artists ripping off the dotted-line path thing, but just as many ripping ON FC. It’s startling how much his sense of humor resembles my grandfather’s. Comedy really is bound to the times.

  10. TwoClubs
    June 7th, 2005 at 10:02 am [Reply]

    Hart is also an arrogant a**hole, a fact so apparent with installments like this one. The message is that even though ALL creatures can claim to be created by God, some of us are merely meant to be laughed at. To insinuate such a thing: that you are somehow *in* on the joke is the ultimate in arrogance and bigotry.

    Death to B.C.!

  11. daChipster
    June 7th, 2005 at 10:03 am [Reply]

    HA-EEYYY! Take me now, Lord, I can die happy!

    I’d like to thank Josh, and the Kollege, errr, I mean the Coup Klutz Clan, uh-erm, I mean da Family…whatever!

    It’s great to know that 5 months of slacking has FINALLY paid off. For all you young commenters out there, hold on to your dreams, keep submitting those comments, even if you think no one will spew over them but your mother – I LOVE YOU MOM – and aim for the stars.

    Yss, aim for the stars, because even if you fall short you’ll reach the sun. And die from a horribly painful sunburn that not even SPF 2001 could prevent.

    Bless you all, bless this site and JOHNNY HART BLESS AMERICA!

  12. Monkey David
    June 7th, 2005 at 10:18 am [Reply]

    Preciously_Odd: yes, Keane’s website has been discussed here, but usually next to a mention of the cease & desist on the “Dysfunctional Family Circus” guy. But I suspect that Keane’s syndicate did the strong arming (I love using “syndicate” here in a 30′s gangster sort of way). There’s a mirror to those comics around here somewhere, and some are pretty funny (but my favorite is missing: Billy talking to Daddy sitting on the couch, and the dad saying, “Look, the only twelve steps I’m taking is to the ‘frig to get another beer!”
    Also, I’m not sure Keane was wrong, because in the case of “Dysfunctional Family Circus,” it wasn’t just a one-off parody, it was someone taking the original, copyrighted (not re-drawn) comics almost daily and then mocking them…oh, wait, that’s sort of what Josh does too. Nevermind.

  13. Flasshe
    June 7th, 2005 at 10:26 am [Reply]

    In today’s FC, Papa Keane is caught talking to his mistress on his cell phone. I can’t wait for the bitter custody battle.

  14. Flasshe
    June 7th, 2005 at 10:26 am [Reply]

    Oh, and congrats, daChip!

  15. Nom du Jour
    June 7th, 2005 at 10:29 am [Reply]

    I think Papa Keane is talking to himself, on his self phone. He has no friends. No one to call. His self esteem is gone. He is left to wander the yard with a cell phone he found, pretending to call someone.

  16. WoodrowFan
    June 7th, 2005 at 10:41 am [Reply]

    I think that IS “BC” talking. The strip is actually named after the main character, a caveman named ‘BC”.

  17. Wes Rand
    June 7th, 2005 at 10:43 am [Reply]

    I think we all have it backwards. Look at Grog … that huge grin. He’s obviously the one doing the laughing. It’s a moment of painful self-realization for the generic caveman.

  18. chucky_bob
    June 7th, 2005 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

    Look closely at BC’s (or what’s-his-name’s) expression in the last panel. He’s dejected. I think he realizes that if God has a sense of humor the joke is on him… Grog, despite being small, has a huge mouth, which would suggest ample tongue to please a lady caveman. Also, that big nose and all that hair suggests he’s well-endowed down below.

    So, it looks like Mr. Hart is projecting his feelings about his own inadequate genitalia and love-making ability onto the main character here.

    It seems to me that Mr. Hart believes that by representing fundamentalist Christianity, God will lift the joke, causing his penis to grow, so he can quit this stupid comic strip and go into porn movies.

  19. Islamorada Girl
    June 7th, 2005 at 1:24 pm [Reply]

    Yay, Chip!

  20. Islamorada Girl
    June 7th, 2005 at 3:21 pm [Reply]

    Johnny Hart THINKS he’s God.
    Not the smartest move.

  21. Lor
    June 7th, 2005 at 3:41 pm [Reply]

    Go daChip!

    I have issues with this comic (other than those already mentioned). Seems BC is calling lovable ol’ Grog stupid. Finish the statement “Ask a stupid question” and it would appear that he thinks Grog is the stupid answer. Not very nice of the backward caveman!

  22. Wilco
    June 7th, 2005 at 3:55 pm [Reply]

    Thanks for the laugh, Josh. This is one of the funniest posts in a while. I usually don’t comment, due to the HUGE number of comments that pile up here, but I had to say Good Job. I actually KNEW the hairy guy’s name because my parents had a mug with GROG on it when I was a kid.

  23. daChipster
    June 7th, 2005 at 5:12 pm [Reply]

    First of all, Hart is being really hard on Grog, who just a couple of weeks ago discovered gravity.

    Second, am I the only one who thinks that this picture of the caveman pumping his fist

    Looks like Kevin Costner?

  24. Anne Nonymous
    June 7th, 2005 at 5:29 pm [Reply]

    Yes, Chip, you are.

  25. Suzii
    June 7th, 2005 at 6:12 pm [Reply]

    I really, really, hate to say it, but I happen to know that the caveman with the high forehead is “Thor.”

  26. Suzii
    June 7th, 2005 at 6:19 pm [Reply]

    Upon review, the high forehead isn’t showing in this instance. Ok, the caveman whose hair is thinning on his flat top and straight down the back is Thor. He used to see himself as the Hugh Hefner of the gang. The blond guy who “looks like Kevin Costner” (linked above by Chip) is Peter. B.C. has red hair, shaped sorta like Peter’s but not as large, and he’s shorter than everybody except Grog.

  27. Anne Nonymous
    June 7th, 2005 at 7:37 pm [Reply]

    Suzii- and just why do you know so much about the Hart ouvre? This is very scary.

  28. Speed Racer X
    June 7th, 2005 at 8:01 pm [Reply]

    Hail to the Konclave! First time poster here.

    The Richard Jenni bit (mentioned above)goes like this (but I remember it differently):

    They say love is blind,

    and God is love,

    Therefore, God is Ray Charles….
    (laugh track inserted here)

  29. Speed Racer X
    June 7th, 2005 at 8:04 pm [Reply]

    Oh yeah, and Death to Gil Thorp!

  30. Islamorada Girl
    June 7th, 2005 at 9:10 pm [Reply]

    Mega Death to BC! Shouldn’t Johnny Hart be of an age to meet the Great Illustrator soon?

  31. Anne Nonymous
    June 7th, 2005 at 10:43 pm [Reply]

    I-Girl, I sure hope he doesn’t have any children that he’s training to take over the strip.

  32. violencejackal
    June 8th, 2005 at 12:16 am [Reply]

    That cavedude in the first panel looks like a completely different guy in the next two panels. If somebody pointed this out already, I apologize, but I was just so stunned I had to post.

  33. johncomic
    June 8th, 2005 at 3:37 am [Reply]

    B.C. can be distinguished from Thor by his little tuft of forehead hair that fluffs out frontward, where Thor’s is slicked back smooth away from the forehead.

    And of course we can’t forget the one with black hair and glasses [Clumsy Carp], the unshaven one with a wooden leg [Wiley], and the one with close-cropped bumpy hair [Curls]. In the 60′s, Curls was dubbed “the master of sarcastic wit”. And he was. And he appeared often. And the strip was full of wit.

    But now… I don’t follow the strip per se, but I haven’t seen Curls appear in it in years. Is this Hart’s tacit admission that he can’t write wit anymore???

  34. Arthur Name
    June 8th, 2005 at 9:01 am [Reply]
    addresses Grog’s and Thor’s relationship off-panel.
    Unfortunately the link will only last ’til tomorrow, when it’ll have a new name.
    I thought that since God has a sense of humor, and Hart made Grog (who is funny, allegedly) Johnny Hart thinks he’s God.

  35. Peaches
    June 8th, 2005 at 2:18 pm [Reply]

    Anne–not to get too theological here, but would a just and merciful deity allow the likes of Johnny Hart to breed? Too often, recovering alcoholics switch their addiction from booze to religion. . .hmmm. . . does this mean when Mary gets through with her, Ritzilla will be preaching on street corners?

  36. Adouble
    June 8th, 2005 at 3:13 pm [Reply]

    Arthur, the link is:
    and I thought Ces did a particularly good job with this comic.

  37. Kip W
    June 8th, 2005 at 6:03 pm [Reply]

    Allow me. I’ve been reading the strip since the 60s, when it was funny every day! Since Thor has already been identified, I’ll point out that Grog actually evolved in the strip, one Sunday. As Peter describes a version of evolution in which a random clump of seaweed washed ashore and grew arms and legs and a brain, one does just that, and ends up being Grog. Grog spoke in one panel, then went forever mute (except for shouting his name), and BC explained to Peter that he was just talking to a clump of seaweed.

    It takes a big caveman to militantly deny something that has taken place right there as he watched and had the process described. That’s on the order of being an atheist in the middle of what is clearly the End Times — I’m talking about people in fiction, of course.

    I feel fairly sure I’ve recounted this here before. I’d best go now.

  38. El Barto
    June 8th, 2005 at 11:40 pm [Reply]

    Wait wait wait…
    Johnny Hart, the psycho christian whackjob has a character in his whackjob propaganda strip that is based on evolution?

    dont all those whackjobs hate evolution?

    regardless, the continued existance of this strip shows that there truly is no such thing as a merciful god.

    that is all

  39. Kip W
    June 9th, 2005 at 7:10 am [Reply]

    Well, we all know the Godster has a wacky sense of humor. It could be that Grog is a “plant,” the same way Big G “planted” all those fossils and bones to test our faith. Woe unto he who believes the record! Maybe He even “planted” the memory of the strip being funny in the 60s.

    Mysterious are the ways of Grog. I mean, of the Intelligent Designer.

  40. gpitsme
    July 31st, 2005 at 11:18 am [Reply]

    Is it just me, or is Hart scared of going to hell for all of his past cartoon transgressions? I remember a time when B.C. was actually funny! Now since he is all jesused up he has become an idiot. I am not saying the 2 go hand-in-hand, but it is not uncommon…

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