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Hope I die, etc.

The Middletons, 12/5/05

Old people … they don’t know anything about the new days … watch. “Hey, granny, pretty soon you’ll need to go on the Web to make sure you get your Social Security checks! What? No, the Web doesn’t have anything to do with spiders! It involves a computer, which you’re terrified of using and can’t afford on your fixed income. Don’t cry, though; I hear the supermarket gives out week-old donuts and damaged cans of dog food after closing time on Thursdays!”

The Middletons have waded into the comedy gold mine that is the generation gap before, though usually in this strip the humor content (such as it is) derives from the elderly lady here being much more hep to modern-day cultural touchstones (like the rock and roll music that’s all the rage these days) than her son. Of course, this joke is so soul-searingly hilarious that it’s totally worth it to throw out this established aspect of her character.

37 responses to “Hope I die, etc.”

  1. randomdude
    December 6th, 2005 at 2:24 am [Reply]

    This is Family Circus material.

  2. mooselet
    December 6th, 2005 at 3:09 am [Reply]

    This is just….so…. lame. Shoot me now, please.

  3. walt
    December 6th, 2005 at 4:36 am [Reply]

    I believe “hip-hopping horse” would be more age appropriate.

  4. Eo
    December 6th, 2005 at 5:22 am [Reply]

    Was there ever overlap between the age when young children said that music was “rockin’” and the age when young children were not familiar with rocking horses? Was there ever a moment in history when this joke would have made sense?

  5. Frank Drackman
    December 6th, 2005 at 6:42 am [Reply]

    I like grannys big semetic nose with the hint of alcoholic rosacea in the last panel. She bears a faint resemblence to Thursty from Hi & Lois. Wilson has that shading to indicate hes not caucasian…I think it would have worked better as a FC strip…where Jeffy imagines a “Rockin HEARSE” complete with Journey tribute band playing as Grandpa rides to his eternal reward.

  6. adfella
    December 6th, 2005 at 10:23 am [Reply]


    Can anyone explain the joke in today’s B.C…..something to do with pro-choice?

  7. BigJoe
    December 6th, 2005 at 10:25 am [Reply]

    #6 – Cause if the queen was pro-choice then the teacher (and none of them) would have been born, because she would have aborted all 8,000,000 eggs I guess.

    Har dee har har.

  8. BigJoe
    December 6th, 2005 at 10:26 am [Reply]

    #7 correction – Cause if the queen was pro-choice then the teacher (actually all of them) would not have been born, because she would have aborted all 8,000,000 eggs I guess.

    Har dee har har.

  9. ComicsFan
    December 6th, 2005 at 10:28 am [Reply]

    adfella, presumably Queen Ida is the queen of the ant colony, and therefore the mother of all the ants (or maybe the grandmother–the kid ant seems to be talking to his mom…) If Queen Ida had been pro choice, maybe no teacher because she’d have killed all her eggs?


  10. BigJoe
    December 6th, 2005 at 10:30 am [Reply]

    Wait a minute. How can the ant have a mother ant that isn’t the queen? I seem to have detected a flaw in Johnny Hart’s world. Well, one little flaw after all these years can be forgiven.

  11. Beasley
    December 6th, 2005 at 10:34 am [Reply]

    “My hovercraft is full of eels.”

  12. luluchappel
    December 6th, 2005 at 10:44 am [Reply]

    That Johnny Hart is just a laugh riot, isn’t he? How DOES he keep coming up with these witty jokes and one-liners after all these years? Ha ha ha.

  13. Johnny Hart
    December 6th, 2005 at 11:04 am [Reply]

    Aw, flibber dee floo! If you don’t like my comics, Jesus will get you. Flibber dee jibber dee blibberdee floo!

  14. BigJoe
    December 6th, 2005 at 11:12 am [Reply]

    That’s the funniest thing I’ve read from Johnny Hart ever!

  15. BigJoe
    December 6th, 2005 at 11:15 am [Reply]

    MW – What in the world is “Wendy” wearing today? That coat looks like someone took a doormat and sewed on a collar.

    And why no mention about what’s in the package that Mary is carrying. What could it be??? The suspense is killing me!

  16. Chet McCord, Wildlife Defender
    December 6th, 2005 at 11:20 am [Reply]

    So, “choice” always equals “kill the offspring?”

    I thought the ant-kid (who really should be a maggot-like larva without arms or legs, and no ability to vocalize) was talking with his mother. But that would make no sense, since all the ants in the colony are the direct offspring of Queen Ida.

  17. Phinneaus J. Whoopigoldberg
    December 6th, 2005 at 11:25 am [Reply]

    Is it me, or is this this dirtiest looking strip that doesn’t feature PigPen?

  18. BigJoe
    December 6th, 2005 at 11:48 am [Reply]

    MT: Who’s the chick, a relative of Marge Simpson?

    Curtis: Hey, pretty good joke today, I liked it. Except for the first panel, is the dad retarded? He asks Curtis how he could know he was smoking when he wasn’t in the room, while he is smoking and while Curtis is in the room.

  19. Sheila
    December 6th, 2005 at 12:42 pm [Reply]

    Hey, speaking of obscure gags, does anybody get today’s Born Loser? I didn’t.

  20. fuzzmaster
    December 6th, 2005 at 1:18 pm [Reply]

    #19: Puzzled me, too. Is he staring at his stomach? Pondering the essential meaninglessness of his life? Did he fart?

  21. Sheila
    December 6th, 2005 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

    I thought he dropped his eyes to the level of his wife’s boobs… but she has her arms crossed… and anyway that makes no sense.

  22. gershwin
    December 6th, 2005 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

    Re Zippy: Wouldn’t Tweety actually say “I’m a pewennial fixture on the wold-wide pop cultue scene” ?

  23. Bigfoot
    December 6th, 2005 at 2:04 pm [Reply]

    #19 etc.: Maybe he’s dropped his head in shame. Ever had someone wordlessly meet your gaze & refuse to either speak or look away? That’s what’s happening in panel 2 as far as I’m concerned.

  24. Sassy_Rocks
    December 6th, 2005 at 2:47 pm [Reply]

    Jack Elrod’s mixed messages show a complete disconnect between M-S soap opera Mark Trail and the Sunday Mark Trail sermon. Mark Trail’s recent pet negligence is totally at odds with his Sunday sermon about responsible pet ownership. How has Buddy Bacon morphed from his previous freak show closeup into a normal looking redneck? “Pa, stealing pets is wrong”. What a worthless, mealy mouthed daughter. “Shut up girl and pour my coffee”.

  25. King Folderol
    December 6th, 2005 at 3:05 pm [Reply]

    Speaking of Mark Trail, since when did rednecks drink coffee? Shouldn’t Overall Boy have a big ol’ 40 sitting in his hand? If you’re going to do the stereotype, do the stereotype, man!

  26. ellcee
    December 6th, 2005 at 3:55 pm [Reply]

    Middletons reminds me of FBoFW and the Zit Arc. Kids these days!


  27. Adouble
    December 6th, 2005 at 4:26 pm [Reply]

    Everyone is going to be shocked when it turns out the only enterance requirement for Heaven is appreciation of B.C. comics. And not just the funny old stuff, the crappy new stuff too.

  28. Phinneaus J. Whoopigoldberg
    December 6th, 2005 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

    In good news …

    A promising newcomer.

  29. Marc
    December 6th, 2005 at 5:25 pm [Reply]

    FC: Billy, they can be your brothers and sisters, but that would be anti-christian, and that’s what you stand for. It would make Johnny Hart want to slit his wrists.

  30. fuzzmaster
    December 6th, 2005 at 5:45 pm [Reply]

    following #19: After more deliberation, I think we have these choices.

    1. The cartoonist intended word bubbles for the last two panels but the letterer forgot them, and the editor at the syndicate grew too bored years ago to actually read the thing before sending it out.

    2. Something in the Cathy strip down the page distracted the characters and they forgot what they were talking about.

    3. The cartoonist put the word bubbles outside the narrow frame of the strip, in a protest of shrinking comics that’s his way of sticking to The Man.

    4. It’s an experiment. If he can get away with this, he’ll do nothing but silence from now on and just keep collecting those paychecks. Suckers!

    5. The strip’s been taken over by the creators of Henry and Ferd’nand.

  31. Kaliflower
    December 6th, 2005 at 5:47 pm [Reply]

    Today’s B.C. is a cornucopia of stupidity. Lameness is just par for the course from Mr. Hart and, in fact, I’m not even that bothered by his ridiculous assumption ‘Pro-Choice’ really means a ‘Lilith like demon with an insatiable appetite for the blood of the unborn’. Rather my main problem is that, instead of taking a direct path to such a statement, he felt the need to bring it up by means of an unnecessarily circuitous course.

    ‘Hmm… how could a get a dig in on Pro-Choice? Well gee… Pro-Choice people are for ‘choice’ apparently… and… ‘multiple choice tests’ has the word choice in it… Bingo! A pun! Time for some golf!’

  32. randomdude
    December 6th, 2005 at 6:05 pm [Reply]

    Johnny Hart is getting very sloppy on his background birds.

  33. Robert Flaxman
    December 6th, 2005 at 8:28 pm [Reply]

    Why can’t you like rocking horses and Metallica?

  34. Len
    December 7th, 2005 at 8:13 am [Reply]

    #28 — Thanks for drawing my attention to Ink Pen! Cleverly done new comic strip. But the receptionist/ dispatcher, does NOT look like a rat. A coyote, maybe?

  35. dalton
    December 7th, 2005 at 9:49 am [Reply]

    Hip Hop? What is that, music for bunny rabbits?

  36. Johnny Hart
    December 9th, 2005 at 11:41 pm [Reply]

    Pro-choice and pro-evolution people are heathens who will burn in eternal torment. I also don’t like lawyers, politicians, or people who run the public school systems.

  37. Roger M. Wilcox
    June 1st, 2013 at 11:56 pm [Reply]

    Week-old donuts actually sound pretty good. I mean, if they have sprinkles.

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