The Comics CurmudgeonHey, kids, volunteer (or Marmaduke will eat you)

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Hey, kids, volunteer (or Marmaduke will eat you)

Marmaduke, 10/21/09

As you may have noticed, many comics are earnestly pushing a pro-volunteering agenda this week, with results that range from the “so irritating that even people who like volunteering will come to view it with scorn” (Luann) to “so cynical that they seem to be actually making fun of the very concept of helping one’s fellow citizens” (Archie, Wizard of Id). Probably the best of the lot is today’s Marmaduke, in which the titular hell-beast takes some time out from burying the bones of his victims to help his serial killer neighbor prep some backyard graves.

Mark Trail, 10/21/09

You know, Mark Trail has always been kind of David Lynchian, but things seems to be accelerating this week. I missed it Monday when a word balloon clearly containing dialogue for Bob emerged from the head of Mr. Sinister Sideburns; today, the same phenomenon recurs. Is Rusty just passing the time in the swamp by practicing his ventriloquism? Is “Rusty” just one Mark’s many personalities, and panel one a brief hint of the real world of Mark Trail, in which an isolated man spends days nattering on to nobody in particular? Or is the whole universe of the strip simply collapsing, with the very identities of the various characters becoming increasingly fluid as their reality dissolves into nothingness? The last possibility would explain the ominous, world-consuming mist pooling around Mark and Rusty’s feet in the final panel.

Cathy, 10/21/09

To Westerners, one of the most striking aspects of Hindu deities is that they are portrayed with more than the usual complement of limbs. Now, most Hindus do not in fact believe that, say, Vishnu is a blue-skinned man with four arms; rather, since arms and hands are the methods that humans use to impose their will on the world, the depiction of Vishnu as four-armed represents his power, which is beyond that of mortals. The characters in Cathy are also occasionally portrayed with many arms, and by analogy I have always taken this to be metaphorical, generally representing their flailing, desperate, and ultimately fruitless attempts to control themselves or the world around them. Today, however, we learn that they are in fact literally becoming monstrous, tentacled hell-beasts — and frankly not a minute to soon when it comes to piquing my interest in future developments in this feature.

Gil Thorp, 10/21/09

So Duncan Daley has spent this fall storyline by turns refusing to drink, brooding manfully, and injuring his fellow football players in uncontrollable bursts of rage. And today, the big reveal: he’s doing it all because his brother’s in prison, which makes total sense. “Gah, I told Danny I’d be in jail in time to celebrate his birthday with him! How many people do I have to maim before they lock me up?”

This entry was posted on Wednesday, October 21, 2009 at 10:30 am and is filed under Cathy, Gil Thorp, Mark Trail, Marmaduke. |

272 responses to “Hey, kids, volunteer (or Marmaduke will eat you)”

Cranky
October 21st, 2009 at 10:35 am [Reply]

“Probably the best of the lot is today’s Marmaduke, in which the titular hell-beast takes some time out from burying the bones of his victims to help his serial killer neighbor prep some backyard graves.”

Hemingway said “Write the truest sentence you know.” Here, Josh, you have succeeded.
MattF
October 21st, 2009 at 10:36 am [Reply]

That first MT panel, showing the huge-headed alien “Rusty” holding an axe will be featured in my nightmares tonight.
Saluki
October 21st, 2009 at 10:45 am [Reply]

Shoe: Rolling back the odometer? Is that what the middle agers are calling it these days?
TheDiva
October 21st, 2009 at 10:46 am [Reply]

Luann: Um, Bernice, that’s not usually what the phrase “the big O” refers to…or I don’t know, maybe that’s just the way you’re kinked.
AMC
October 21st, 2009 at 10:46 am [Reply]

I think that, soon, I’ll be obligated to visit Jack Elrod in the home.

I’ll bring him a niced stuffed squirrel to help him pass the time.
Zamboni_Rodeo
October 21st, 2009 at 10:50 am [Reply]

MT: “Yes, I was very lucky! … If by ‘lucky,’ you mean suffering blunt force trauma to the head and having a potential subdural hematoma and not being able to think clea– oh, hey look! A tree!”
Ms Avery
October 21st, 2009 at 10:50 am [Reply]

Adding to the Lynchian feel of MT is the bundle of logs yelling “Wow!” in panel 2. Rusty is far creepier than the Log Lady, though.
Brave Little Toaster
October 21st, 2009 at 11:00 am [Reply]

BB Nice typos, by which I mean, “Nice boobs.”

RMMD I am happy to see that those correspondence art classes Graham Nolan took are beginning to pay off in his use of moody lighting effects and odd “camera angles.” Who, for instance, is not moved and excited by the up-nostril view of Tim’s booger-lair in Panel 1 of today’s strip? I am relieved, however, that Tim does appear to be a regular user of the nose hair trimmer given to him last Christmas.
Flo's Rolling Pin
October 21st, 2009 at 11:00 am [Reply]

What is Adam Lambert (of American Idol fame) doing in panel 1 of Gil Thorp?
mvg
October 21st, 2009 at 11:02 am [Reply]

MT: “Yes, I was very lucky, Rusty. Except that I seem to have established our new camp in the middle of quicksand. There go our feet…”

DT: So the presumption seems to be that an adult tiger cannot spring as high as a middle-aged police detective. Is there someplace I can wager money on that?

H&L: And … thanks to Chip, Trixie veers at the last moment from a potential path as Marvin’s soulmate.

9CL: Nah, didn’t hurt a bit. Try again.
Bootsy
October 21st, 2009 at 11:03 am [Reply]

I picture Mark saying “Did Mr. Jackson really save you from an alligator, Mark?” in a really sarcastic, making fun of Rusty’s question sort of way.

And what the hell is that in the foreground of the last panel of Gil Thorp(e)? It looks like she’s putting a pair of bunny slippers in a space age washing machine.

Josh likes the word “hell-beast” today!
Perky Bird
October 21st, 2009 at 11:03 am [Reply]

It appears little Sassy the Dog is actually made out of delicious chocolate chip cookie dough.
MattF
October 21st, 2009 at 11:03 am [Reply]

Also, in the MT first panel, the hand emerging from the middle of Mark Twain’s chest. But seriously, folks, there’s a problem here.
the good ship thetis
October 21st, 2009 at 11:05 am [Reply]

Comic Strip Panel Writing 101
Today, class, we will learn about narrative flow. You see, when you finally reveal a major secret in a character’s past, the audience will immediately have questions. For instance…”my brother’s in prison.” Naturally the audience will be asking “why, whatever for?” Therefore the next panel should attempt to answer this question, e.g.:
…”he brought a Cub Scout knife to school.”
…”he set fire to former President Bush’s boat storage unit.”
…”he refused to buy mandatory health insurance.”
Anyone of these will do. By the way, has anyone seen Rod Whigam today? Whigam? Whigam?
Bootsy
October 21st, 2009 at 11:05 am [Reply]

Brave Little Toaster @ 8, I will work “booger-lair” into as many conversations as I can today. Thank you!
Comcis Fan
October 21st, 2009 at 11:06 am [Reply]

FC: Another valium-soaked gaze of despair from a trapped member of the Keane cast, this time Thel, knowing she must respond lovingly, even though she’d like to show Jeffy how much her middle finger has grown.

FW: Will they get through the week without a lightning strike?

S4th: Sorry friend, no room in the budget to hire you on my staff. See? I’m even wearing clothes from the late Tootsie Era, that’s how tight the budget it. Speaking of tight, permt me to bounce my “love life” troubles off you. (Prediction: Aria is lurking somewhere in this story line, even if only in the recesses of Ted’s mind, as it lingers by the office vending machine where first he met his sci-fi geeky temptress.)

Memo to Gen. Halftrack: Darn tootin’ you’d better be saying nice “typos.” Now, if you’d hired her for her typing skills, general, you might have a valid complaint.
Toby
October 21st, 2009 at 11:07 am [Reply]

It appears that Duncan could use a little good Fratricide.
Nekrotzar
October 21st, 2009 at 11:09 am [Reply]

I can’t believe that Cathy did something meta. Now meta has been ruined for everyone.
Will
October 21st, 2009 at 11:10 am [Reply]

Luann: Bite me, Delta. What a colossally insufferable character!
Jackuul
October 21st, 2009 at 11:11 am [Reply]

@18: I Can’t Believe It’s Not Cthulhu! Too bad they scared off Fabio.
AhClem
October 21st, 2009 at 11:13 am [Reply]

Big Dog – Look at that panel again. Is that really a pile of dirt, or did Marmaduke’s bowel blockage finally clear itself, resulting in a massive, steaming pile of the remains of his victims from the past two weeks?
AndyL
October 21st, 2009 at 11:14 am [Reply]

This week’s Sally Forth seems to be building up to something.

I’m sure that by Saturday Sally is going to be screwing someone, but I’d only give 50% odds that it’ll be Ted.
Francis
October 21st, 2009 at 11:14 am [Reply]

Irving’s mom forgot to mention the projectile beads of sweat.
frostee
October 21st, 2009 at 11:19 am [Reply]

And in a weird crossover, Cathy features the new leader of the Spider People.

http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix3/spiderpeopleuvpr.htm
Cranky
October 21st, 2009 at 11:21 am [Reply]

“Danny, Davey, 23, 24, whatever. He’s really just Prisoner #24601 these days anyway, isn’t that right, Duncan?”

And so begins the tale of another future Gil Thorp stalker.
Chris
October 21st, 2009 at 11:23 am [Reply]

Gil Thorp, senility. Senility, Gil. Apparently remember names of former athletes just doesn’t matter anymore. Davey Daley, Danny Daley, what’s the difference? When does basketball season start?
ArtisticPlatypus
October 21st, 2009 at 11:30 am [Reply]

..And to survive the mob that would inevitably try to kill her, the six-armed behemoth split her soul in three parts, and infused two of them in seemingly harmless paintings? The humour in cathy is, like, six levels of intellectuality above my understanding.
Ned Ryerson
October 21st, 2009 at 11:30 am [Reply]

Careful with that axe, Rusty.
Carlo
October 21st, 2009 at 11:31 am [Reply]

I think the Wiz hit it on the head Monday (sorry, I’m a couple days behind).

http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComic.mpl?date=2009/10/19&name=Wizard_of_Id

The forced volunteerism in schools IS, in fact, slave labor.
Jacob
October 21st, 2009 at 11:34 am [Reply]

Gil Thorp: Duncan appears to have the emotional maturity of a twelve year-old. He barges in on the coach (who was probably working on more nefarious matters at the moment), and flails his arms about, while declaring, “YOU KNOW WHO SUCKS, COACH? MY BROTHER, THAT’S WHO!” Coach, startled by this intrusion, glances sideways as he tries to remember if this player has a brother. Failing that, he takes a guess at the man’s name (and age, for some reason). As Duncan corrects him, we see that he’s already switched from wild rage to pure sadness, and has turned his back on Coach in the hopes that he’ll be surprised by a friendly hand on his shoulder, just so he can shove it off.
Lawyerbob
October 21st, 2009 at 11:36 am [Reply]

11 Bootsy: What it really looks like is that she’s putting a teeny-tiny Thorp in a washing machine. Is that the secret to Gil’s utter lack of appropriate human emotional response–that he’s a mere miniaturized simulacrum that’s projected, like Mr. Big in “Rocky and Bullwinkle”, onto various backgrounds like the football field or Marty Moon?
Patrick
October 21st, 2009 at 11:40 am [Reply]

I like how Duncan expresses his rage in the first panel through Twyla Tharp-style interpretive dance.
JC Lisbon
October 21st, 2009 at 11:42 am [Reply]

“David Lynchian” pretty much describes today’s Mark Trail perfectly. I think we can assume that the “Bob” they are referring to is really the Man From Another Place, and that when Mark finds him, he will demand his Garmonbozia. And then punch him.
Zamboni_Rodeo
October 21st, 2009 at 11:43 am [Reply]

19, Will: Really, your observation could be applied to just about anyone in the comics. Observe:

Bite me, Mary. What a colossally insufferable character!
Bite me, Bernice. What a colossally insufferable character!
Bite me, Marvin. What a colossally insufferable character!
Bite me, Thorax. What a colossally insufferable character!
Bite me, Curtis. What a colossally insufferable character!

I could go on, but why bother. What I mean to say, Will, is that you have written the universally perfect snark. Kudos!
Niall
October 21st, 2009 at 11:45 am [Reply]

Weird Wednesday:

BC: If this is supposed to make sense, or be funny, it missed the mark completely. Even if it’s about volunteering, whcih isn’t “the spirit of giving”, and it’s the wrong time for Christmas.

Beetle: It really looks like it should be “nice tits” from her reaction. Either a harassment suit is in order, or she finally tends in her 2-week notice.

Garfield: I.. I.. Jon gave a palpable zing to Garfield? Talkback? Sass from Jon??? Pack up parkas, those going to hell, you’re going to need ‘em!

Thorp: Okay, one point for not going the obvious route of substance abuse. This is actually sad, and somewhere within the realm of the plausible. It probably won’t last, but coupled with Garfield, we’re getting into Twilight Zone territory here.

Hi & Marvin: that’s what today’s strip title should be. Ugh.

Parker: actually, in real life, if you have nothing to lose, why worry about killing the guy who ruined your life? You don’t have much left, so what can the justice system possibly do to you? Sorry, Sam, motive won’t stick to the slightest cross-examination.

Marm: oh crap, even this is getting in the volunteer theme. What is this for?? It’s not National Volunteer week! …oh crap indeed – looking at it again, it looks like the neighbour is pissed because marm gave him a giant soft turd right on front of him. It’s “volunteering for his gardening” perhaps, but… no. Ick.

Mary Worth: You can always try screaming in his ear, Adrian.

My Cage: oh, win on Norm there.

Pluggers: Logic Fail! Stores can buy supplies older than they are, and old stores aren’t obligated to keep supplies from their entire history in stock! Also, new radios will have better reception and cost a tenth of the price of a tube.

Morgan: Panel 1: The Stache Speaks. There need not be any other panels today.

Sally Forth: Sorry Sally, but a colonoscopy only involves one person; sex involves two and is often viewed as even more intimate, at least with co-workers and close friends. It’s easier to talk about it with complete strangers, sometimes.

..and continuing the Weird theme: Cathy: It acknowledges its visual trope and snarks itself?? Alongside parkas in hell, everyone needs sturdy wide-brimmed hats to catch the manure falling from flying porcines.
Niall
October 21st, 2009 at 11:45 am [Reply]

34. Zamboni Rodeo: more universal than “Christ, what an asshole”?
Mr Foofram
October 21st, 2009 at 11:46 am [Reply]

Elrod goes out of his way to avoid drawing feet. Characters in Mark Trail are generally portrayed standing behind logs, boulders, porcupines, whatever is convenient.
buckyswife
October 21st, 2009 at 11:47 am [Reply]

MT: While I like Josh’s David Lynch speculation (because, really, the addition of a dwarf and an oxygen tank would only make me love this strip more), now I’m genuinely curious: Why is the dialogue balloon correct in the print version but not online?

Perhaps someone more informed about “comics-strip manufacturing” can enlighten me?
150
October 21st, 2009 at 11:48 am [Reply]

Wow, today’s Cathy might be the most meta thing that ever made it into a newspaper comics page. Kudos, Cathy.
buckyswife
October 21st, 2009 at 11:49 am [Reply]

37 Mr Foofram: That’s true, because Mark’s delicate, womanly feet are his secret shame—although in a pinch, he can use them to kick down a door to reach the object of his punchy desires.
Poteet
October 21st, 2009 at 11:52 am [Reply]

MT — How embarrassing. In spite of my careful reading of this strip, I somehow missed the dialogue balloon coming out of the wrong poacher. Won’t let that sort of thing happen again, no sir.

I am looking carefully at Panel Three and admiring the evidence that even campfire smoke obeys Mark’s mighty will. At ordinary campfires, smoke insists on rising and even gets in people’s eyes. This smoke, not wanting to be punched, cowers low.
Mela
October 21st, 2009 at 11:54 am [Reply]

#35 – No “true” Plugger would be caught being sold equipment by a hobbyist (he might have tattoos or scary piercings), or buy one of those newfangled radios with those weird CD player things.

OBH: Wow, Ruthie, you just told the story of my life. Thanks.
Dragon of Life
October 21st, 2009 at 11:55 am [Reply]

Duncan Danley reveals his alternate identity, Explosive Tinnitus Lad!
Perky Bird
October 21st, 2009 at 11:59 am [Reply]

Poor Mark. He’s so desparate to talk about his brush with death that he won’t even wait for anyone to bring up the subject. Instead, he just mimics the voice of the nearest person (in this case, Rusty) and asks the question himself. Just remember, Mark, nobody likes a narcissist.
Alan's Addiction
October 21st, 2009 at 12:06 pm [Reply]

I’m not quite sure what that weird dark splotch underneath Marmaduke is supposed to be. A black hole? A pile of dog poop? A hole in the ground? I guess it’s some sort of comics-page Rorschach test. I also like to imagine that “do some volunteer work” is a thinly-veiled euphemism for “kill.”
So many things strike me when I read today’s “Mark Trail.” The first is that Rusty clearly doesn’t have any grasp on the concept of “connotation.” For instance, when I read the statement, “Mr. Jackson saved you from an alligator,” I think of someone beating back alligators with their bare fists while Mark runs off in terror. There’s a distinctive action-scene implied by the sentence. However, when I read, “Bob said when he found me, an alligator was coming toward me,” I get a different mental image. Namely, that Bob did the minimally decent thing and dragged Mark away, with a minimum of personal effort and risk. Bob gets dropped from “Indiana Jones” to “David Rubens, CPA” in my mind in the space of two sentences, so thanks, Rusty. I also like to think that, in a damning testimony to Mark’s “woodsmanship skills” he and Rusty have set up camp in a quicksand pit in the last panel, and their logs are just starting to sink.
In the spirit of Halloween, “Cathy” scared me quite a lot today. Not the weird, extra-appendage-thingy (bravo for breaking the Fourth Wall, Ms. Guisewite), though that was freaky. No, the second panel of the strip is what really frightened me today. Look at Anne’s eyes – they’ve become monstrous, snake-like slits, glaring out above that yawning maw of a mouth, searching for fresh prey. It’s deeply disturbing to me.
Someone needs to call the “Gil Thorp” writers immediately about believable responses to the incarceration of a loved one. Excessive, reckless and risky behavior is believable. Developing some weird form of autism that disables one from some forms of social activities, but not others, isn’t. Developing a unique form of Tourette Syndrome that causes one to flail and shriek when having heart-to-heart chats (as we see in panel one) is also unbelievable.
Dingo
October 21st, 2009 at 12:09 pm [Reply]

I realize many of you don’t live in Illinois but… when did George Ryan leave prison and move next door to Marmaduke?
anonymous
October 21st, 2009 at 12:14 pm [Reply]

9CL: Thorax gives complainers the metaphysical finger!
Tiki Carol
October 21st, 2009 at 12:21 pm [Reply]

MT: Mark and Rusty found the Star Gate device from ap. 217 “Holiday” and switched personalitys.
…………..I need a life.
anonymous
October 21st, 2009 at 12:21 pm [Reply]

It appears that the comic multiverse is being destroyed. What’s next, a Garfield that doesn’t suck?
sarahtheawesome
October 21st, 2009 at 12:28 pm [Reply]

When I see someone with outspread arms, an expression of agony, and a glow around his head, I assume I’m looking at a crucifix. Duncan’s other big secret, apparently, is that he is the Son of God, dying for the sins of the world. I am baffled by this plotline.
Digger
October 21st, 2009 at 12:31 pm [Reply]

#13 – MattF – I’m sure it was unintentional (or maybe not) but I noticed you referred to Mark as “Mark Twain.” Which I guess is understandable, as they both have made a huge contribution to the world of literature.

MT: Today’s strip represents a typical Mark/Rusty interaction. Mark waits for Rusty to speak, Rusty stands silently like a dolt, so Mark starts the conversation by saying what he wants Rusty to say. I like to think that he imitates Rusty’s voice as he does this. I’m sure Mark is great at mimicking the voice of a dorky little weenie. Really not much of a stretch for him at all.
Gal Friday
October 21st, 2009 at 12:32 pm [Reply]

DT: philosophical query: have we grown so callous that a vertical leap of, oh, say, 30-40 feet no longer thrills us?
nescio
October 21st, 2009 at 12:37 pm [Reply]

Jesus Christ and Jonny Hart in Heaven, I don’t understand B.C. again. Can anyone explain it?
Calico
October 21st, 2009 at 12:38 pm [Reply]

I do believe that Irving’s Mother thinks she is the spawn of Icarus.

Is this National Volunteerism Week or something?
Jesse C
October 21st, 2009 at 12:40 pm [Reply]

oh man, I lost it reading the Mark Trail write up. Funniest post in a long time, and that is saying a lot because it always funny!
Fashion Police
October 21st, 2009 at 12:41 pm [Reply]

All one can really say about Mr. McEldowney is that he draws lovely dresses.

Y116, Ukelele Ike:
In general, we approve of gentlemen’s hats, particularly if they are worn with a proper suit and necktie.

We don’t know very much about Yenny. Is she from Dogpatch, USA?

We confess that we have been accused of conservatism in matters of business attire, as we have never quite grasped the concept of “business casual.”

Never having been a “hot secretary,” we cannot speak from experience, but it seems reasonable that subtlety in the display of one’s physical assets is rather more useful than outright brazenness. After all, one is at the office to conduct business, and one should look as if that is the primary purpose.

Sadly, this may be of particular importance for the more pulchritudinous among us, as a certain sobriety of tone could obviate the tendency of one’s more atavistic co-workers to leap to the wrong conclusions. A good rule of thumb would be that your colleagues should not wonder if you’re wearing the same clothes you wore clubbing last night.
hogenmogen
October 21st, 2009 at 12:44 pm [Reply]

So I’m reading into Spiderman that he wishes that a super villian wreaks havoc upon the city, steals money, crashes buildings and cars, threatens lives – including his and MJ’s – in order to sell a few lousy photos to the newspaper? Dude, you really need to get a paying gig.

Dick: So he jumps – how high – with agent Ennen on his arm? What, like a one-foot vertical? Pretty high for a white guy. Unfortunately, the tiger eats the both of them from the thighs downwards. Why is there a trapeze within jumping distance inside of a tiger cage anyway?

9CL: Monty is making fun of his detractors. Word to Monty: Maybe there would be fewer of us if we saw less of you.

Marvin answers his friend’s thought balloon with a legitimate real speech sentence? He talks now?
One-eyed Wolfdog
October 21st, 2009 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

“For heaven’s sake, Miss Buxley, in the second paragraph alone, you’ve misspelled ‘lecherous’, ‘cretin’, and ‘harassment’. And I can’t even imagine how you managed to get three r’s in ‘assgrabber’.”
JustAGuyGuy
October 21st, 2009 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

So in a sense, Mark Trail is the exact opposite of “Garfield Minus Garfield.”
buckyswife
October 21st, 2009 at 12:56 pm [Reply]

35 Niall, re: Sally Forth: I take your point, but still…. While I like my colleagues, I honestly don’t want to engage in any chit-chat about anything involving any of their orifices at any time. Ever.
hogenmogen
October 21st, 2009 at 12:56 pm [Reply]

BC explained: In the first two panels, we see animals of various species giving goods or services to one another. In the third panel, we see that Fat Broad just gave Peter a case of the crabs. Oh, that spirit of giving is in the air – and around the genitalia. And really, what’s funnier than crotch crickets to start your morning?
Sister Sestina
October 21st, 2009 at 12:58 pm [Reply]

Nescio @ 53 – I can’t explain it either, except that panels 1, 2 & 4 refer to the volunteerism trope of the week, and the 3rd panel is all our reactions to it.
Some Guy
October 21st, 2009 at 1:00 pm [Reply]

#35 – Back in the old days, Jon used to make witty comments about Garfield’s weight fairly regularly. As the strip continued, Jon became so much of a loser that he no longer did this. It may be that dating Liz has brought his self-esteem back up to the point where he can taunt his own cat without worrying about reprisals.
Ribinin
October 21st, 2009 at 1:01 pm [Reply]

9CL: When I read it, my take was that it was aimed at those who he anticipated would complain about the “f(l)ags” strip.

I suspect that he has written us off completely.
AhClem
October 21st, 2009 at 1:03 pm [Reply]

9CL – If Brooke turns this strip into nothing more that a platform from which he rails against his critics, we can expect 9CL to slide into that big pit of darkness where the waterfowl-who-must-not-be-named currently resides. But with nicer legs.
McManx
October 21st, 2009 at 1:06 pm [Reply]

Mark Trail — The isolation of Lost Forest is getting to Mark. First, he starts talking to himself. Next he’ll be scrawling “redrum” on the tent flap. Wisely, Rusty has confiscated the axe.
Jackuul
October 21st, 2009 at 1:09 pm [Reply]

I wonder if the Season 4 Finale of Dexter will be him confronting the Trinity Killer, and at the same time taking out Marmaduke for his own murders.
Carter
October 21st, 2009 at 1:12 pm [Reply]

Marmaduke is helping out the neighbor with about fourty-five pounds of steaming “fertilizer.”
nescio
October 21st, 2009 at 1:14 pm [Reply]

Just saying B.C. tried to highlight volunteering and failed isn’t enough for me. I can understand a dog giving a bone to a cat. WTF is going on with a rabbit ploughing a furrow by turtle? Who’s helping who to do what?

And Fat Broad never gets laid, she has to get off by pounding a snake.
Écureuil Écumant
October 21st, 2009 at 1:16 pm [Reply]

5 AMC says: “I think that, soon, I’ll be obligated to visit Jack Elrod in the home. I’ll bring him a nice stuffed squirrel to help him pass the time.”

Oh, if I knew, I could have got you one. I was riding my bike through the ‘hood coming back from the store just now, and I saw someone had run over a possum (which immediately made me think of MT’s recent ass-sniffer).

Then just a couple blocks later, a squirrel darts out in front of my bike while I’m ripping downhill. Now, squirrels live in a non-Euclidean pocket of the universe, such that in two seconds they will be anywhere except where the laws of physics would dictate they’d have to be. Therefore the best course is to forge straight ahead rather than trying to counter their zigs and zags in realtime. Unfortunately, this one singlemindedly flung himself under my front wheel and got centerpunched.

Now before Moly and Squid accuse me of pussydom, let me add that there have been occasions when I’ve deemed a fellow human not to be worth even the cost of the bullet to waste him. But man, I hate to hurt any of these lil’ squirts.

Still, if I’da known at the time, me and AMC coulda worked something out.

Frankly, I suspect this is all ~~cockroach boy’s~~ McEldowney’s doing.
Larry Fine
October 21st, 2009 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

MW — Considering how long it took Mary and Dr. Jeff to reach the hospital after getting the news (and that it took them three days just to get through the door), I would be surprised if the will-Scott-live-or-die storyline reaches its conclusion before all life on Earth ceases to exist. And it may very well continue after that.
Larry Fine
October 21st, 2009 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

DT — Am I the only one who was rooting for the tiger?
Joe Blevins
October 21st, 2009 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

If you think the penultimate silent panel is a comics cliche, Cathy Guisewhite is about to take you to school. Ladies and gentlemen…. the penultimate silent panel as seen through the porthole of a luxury liner!
mvg
October 21st, 2009 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

Patrick (32): “I like how Duncan expresses his rage in the first panel through Twyla Tharp-style interpretive dance.”

Maybe he’s a 9CL fan. His next cameo T-shirt will have Edda on it.

Luann: Interestingly, this neck of the woods had a brand of orange juice sold in Lawson’s convenience stores in the ’60s that was called “Big O.” The ad jingle had a chorus of “Roll on, Big O….” Not having thought of it in years, now I’m gonna forever mentally play that song over the famous deli scene from “When Harry Met Sally”…

DT: Where the blazes are all the other cops in this “investigation”? And wasn’t Dick’s daughter w/him at the circus? Someone please release the great Tiger of Logic into this Big Top of Nonsense.
AirForbes
October 21st, 2009 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

GT: I love the way Gil, who likes to pretend he’s this Concerned Adult Role Model in his students’ lives, isn’t aware that his troubled player has a brother in prison. In a town the size of Milford, there’s no way the school staff wouldn’t know this, unless they were so self-absorbed that – oh, wait, never mind.

MT: I don’t think Mark is providing Rusty’s lines for him – I think he’s providing Sassy’s. I can’t blame him, if you were out in the woods for days with no one but Rusty, you’d long to have conversations with the dog instead, too.
Écureuil Écumant
October 21st, 2009 at 1:33 pm [Reply]

Luann: During the campaign, I started playfully referring to Obama as “The Big O” because the ladies were so swooning over his hottness. One day my sweetheart asked me why I called him that. I said, well, y’know, the ladies are swooning. She replied “Uh, I don’t get it.” !!!

Turned out she had never heard of the phrase (or so she claimed). And when I explained further, she got mad that I had so much nerve to refer to him that way!

Well, now I’ll have to take back what I told her, namely that she was alone in the universe in her ignorance of the phrase.
mvg
October 21st, 2009 at 1:34 pm [Reply]

nescio (69); “And Fat Broad never gets laid, she has to get off by pounding a snake.”

Maybe all this time Fat Broad has actually just been a cross-dressing guy w/man-boobs. “Pounding the snake” is a much better euphemism for a male, after all.
Écureuil Écumant
October 21st, 2009 at 1:36 pm [Reply]

73 Joe Blevins says: “Ladies and gentlemen…. the penultimate silent panel as seen through the porthole of a luxury liner!”

So that’s what it is? Here I was thinking Maw slipped and fell down the privy.
buckyswife
October 21st, 2009 at 1:55 pm [Reply]

70 Écureuil Écumant: Oh! Poor squirrel! I saw one get hit by a car a few weeks ago, and there I was by the side of the road getting all weepy.

My dog, on the other hand, saw it as her best chance to be a predator and catch one of them, so she was just drooling and pulling on the leash.
H-Bob
October 21st, 2009 at 1:58 pm [Reply]

“one of the most striking aspects of Hindu deities is that they are portrayed with more than the usual complement of limbs.” FYI, the multiple limbs are a way of depicting motion or movement. The stuff about powers is off-the-cuff theological rationalization.
Steve the Pocket
October 21st, 2009 at 2:02 pm [Reply]

@#64: For what it’s worth, I was more than willing to give the “f(l)ags” strip the benefit of the doubt, being as it was the first appearance of a real punchline in weeks. Actually being funny is no longer a qualification for me, because I’ve long since lost all hope of that ever happening in this feature.

Cathy: Gentlemen, behold!… the smallest panel in comic strip history!

Curtis: It’s a testament to this feature’s superior handling of National Bug People to Volunteer Week, or whatever it is, that I didn’t realize it was even participating until today.

Edison Lee: This is a good example of what’s wrong with Edison Lee. Anyone who’s never read it before would look at today’s strip and assume it’s a right-wing political comic, when in fact it is a left-wing political comic. Half the time the joke is that Edison’s ideas are brilliant, and the other half it’s that he’s a clever swindler. It’s the same problem Millie from Ozy and Millie had, of alternating between being a mouthpiece and a punching bag, and only by knowing where the author stands politically can one be sure which is which.

Hi and Lois: No, that’s Marvin’s purpose. I guess Brian and Greg forgot who they were working for again.

Luann: I realize Delta being insufferable is part of the joke, but what I’m not getting is who the writer thinks is going to find it funny.

Pluggers: The most charitable interpretation I could get out of this is “Pluggers collect antiques.” I suppose that’ll be me a few more decades down the line, looking for parts for my malfunctioning old Commodore 64… wait, that’s me NOW! Doggammit.
jkaymartin
October 21st, 2009 at 2:07 pm [Reply]

Agh! Eye bleach!

David Lynchian text, maybe; but Rusty looks more like something out of “Freaks”, or maybe Chuckie out of “Child’s Play”. Gah – did I have to look at this before breakfast?
Bootsy
October 21st, 2009 at 2:10 pm [Reply]

Perky Bird @ 44 sez:

Just remember, Mark, nobody likes a narcissist.

Well, a narcissist likes himself.
Farley's Revenge
October 21st, 2009 at 2:11 pm [Reply]

#47anonymous:

9CL: Thorax gives complainers the metaphysical finger!

The complainers respond with a metaphysical yawn.

Personally, I’ve seen stomach lint with far more personality than Thorax. Perhaps the stomach lint should be given a story line? It sure as hell would beat another tedious go-round of Amos ‘n Edda Get Horizontal in Belgium or Thorax Pretends to Know It All.
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
October 21st, 2009 at 2:13 pm [Reply]

9CL: For every 100 lame-ass, self-centered, fetish-obsessed, egotistic, wannabe cartoonist on the Internet, there’s one who actually gets published.

A3G: The question is, will Tommie actually get to keep the results of her makeover? Or will she revert to the basketball-with-a-face look after this plotline is over?

Bizarro: Irving Hillman’s never-mentioned illegitimate brother.

Blondie: Ha, ha, ha! Dagwood sure does like food!

C’haft: Ooh, let me try out the new one. “Bite me, Ed. What a colossally insufferable character!” Hey, it works!

(WT)DT: I’m not bothered by the question of how Dick could jump all the way up to grab a trapeze bar while carrying another full-grown adult, nor why there’s a trapeze hanging in the middle of a tiger cage in the first place. What baffles me is, how can he hold onto that bar with those stubby fingers?

FC: Like plants, fingers need light to grow. If you want them to even out, you’ll have to stick the big ones up your nose, too.

Luann: Wow, she’s really talking to The Big O? I guess she was judged in the Name of God and found Not Guilty.

MW: GAH!!! Don’t DO that!!!

RMMD: Well, I’ve been reading this storyline for months, and I say something’s not quite right, either. Hmmm, what could it be… oh, yeah, no ~~boobs~~ Rex and June!
Bootsy
October 21st, 2009 at 2:18 pm [Reply]

When did the spelling of the word go from “voluntarism” which when I was writing press releases in college for the United Way, was the correct spelling? Was there an official decree (and who has that authority?) changing it to the much sillier “volunteerism”?
Uncle Lumpy
October 21st, 2009 at 2:23 pm [Reply]

#86 Bootsy –

“Volunteerism” is yet another sign of the decline of civilization, epitomized by the steadfast refusal of Those Damn Kids to Get Off My Damn Lawn.
Steve S
October 21st, 2009 at 2:23 pm [Reply]

Wow, is there anything creepier than that mini-Mark with the ax in panel 1 of Mark Trail?

And is there anything more dickish than Gil Thorp indicating his apathy by deliberately getting the kid’s name and age wrong?
queek
October 21st, 2009 at 2:23 pm [Reply]

13: don’t forget Lionel Twain, and his contributions to the mystery literature genre.
Calico
October 21st, 2009 at 2:23 pm [Reply]

#58 – Oh, and let’s not forget “Copious alcoholic.”
Écureuil Écumant
October 21st, 2009 at 2:24 pm [Reply]

86 Bootsy, musta been about the same time that “signs” changed to “signage”, and “sewage” turned to “sewerage” — man, as if road rage wasn’t bad enough, now we got this?
Calico
October 21st, 2009 at 2:29 pm [Reply]

#70 – Ouch, les deux pauvres Écureuils (EE and the running confused one).
I take it said squirrel is no longer with us.
spike
October 21st, 2009 at 2:32 pm [Reply]

AhClem @ 65: Brooke loves us! He really loves us! Given the fact that we’re now congratulating both Batiuk and Guisewite, should we be looking out the window for the Four horsemen of the Apocalypse?
Baka Gaijin
October 21st, 2009 at 2:36 pm [Reply]

#89 queek: Don’t forget about Lionel Jefferson and his contributions to movin’ on up! To the East Side! And the other Lionel Jefferson and his contributions to, um, something.
Baka Gaijin
October 21st, 2009 at 2:38 pm [Reply]

#86 Bootsy and #91 Écureuil Écumant: How about “spelunking” changing into “caving?”
Sister Sestina
October 21st, 2009 at 2:41 pm [Reply]

Bootsy at 86:

“Voluntarism (action), the use of or reliance on voluntary action to maintain an institution, carry out a policy, or achieve an end.” (saith Wikipedia)

Whereas I would say this week is properly about “volunteerism”, which I would define as the boostering or cultification of being a volunteer, without it necessarily having actual benefit.
nescio
October 21st, 2009 at 2:41 pm [Reply]

(77) mvg
I didn’t mean “pounding the snake” as a euphemism. I meant she gets off by literally “pounding a snake,” it’s a recurrent theme in the comic.

I think the “joke” is that Peter or Thor or whoever it is screaming in third panel is selfish and horrified by the though of volunteering. But it’s more fun to think that Wiley sodomized him with his peg leg.
Bootsy
October 21st, 2009 at 2:43 pm [Reply]

@89, queek, I used to have Lionel Twains, they wan awound on a widdle twack.
Bootsy
October 21st, 2009 at 2:46 pm [Reply]

Sister Sestina @96, nice parsing!

Uncle Lumpy, if I believed in a god, I would thank her every day that you are in this world (and that is not a joke).
Écureuil Écumant
October 21st, 2009 at 2:48 pm [Reply]

92 Calico: I didn’t actually go back to check the condition of Schrödinger’s squirrel. I had to leave that task to the neighborhood Jeffys, Dollys, Dittos and Dots. So let’s just hazard a guess that as goes Scott, so goes the squirrel.

With the difference that the squirrel’s beloved has suffered the greater loss, for undoubtedly she’s the one who’s had the bigger nuts in her mouth.
Calico
October 21st, 2009 at 2:57 pm [Reply]

“Schrödinger’s squirrel”
Try to say that ten times fast, drunk or not! : P
maryworthy
October 21st, 2009 at 2:58 pm [Reply]

#5 make sure said stuffed squirrel is monstrous in size!!
Artist formerly known as Ben
October 21st, 2009 at 3:02 pm [Reply]

Cathy: The arms are actually a nice meta-touch. It’s the first time in a while that Cathy has actually made me laugh.

GT: Sent up the river with the name “Danny Daley”? Oh how the other cons will pick on him!

Luann: Trust me girls. None of you will be getting acquainted with the big O anytime soon.

M-Dawg: That’s a big dump!

9CL: No Brooke, don’t hold back. Tell us how you really feel.

BB: “I’d say ‘nice knockers’ but the damn lawyers say I’m not supposed to notice those anymore.”

HOTC: Heart is right to be chagrined. People who don’t take notice of the color scheme will think that Dean is dressed as the Frank Miller version of the Spirit, and who wants to be associated with that?

H&L: What, filling up diapers isn’t enough of a purpose for you? Try telling that to Marvin.

FC: Well Jeffy, that’s because your creator broke the rules of the cartoon universe by giving you five digits on each hand instead of just four. Adding to the list of abominations.
jumper
October 21st, 2009 at 3:13 pm [Reply]

Did Rusty’s head grew large, or did his body shrink?
Niall
October 21st, 2009 at 3:15 pm [Reply]

Y124 MolyBendum: You didn’t tell pastis you were a Mudgeon? I think he knows this site well, and that we view his work positively. Also, I briefly read your last sentence as “Rat will be fucking Ziggy” and my brain darn-near exploded.

Y145 bats :[ : oh sweet lord the RMMD mashup is brilliance.

Y164. Mela on Curtis: also, the voluntarism is used as a plot device, not as a plot, period, with the plot shift today. Dare I say it? It makes Curtis better than all other voluntaring strips. Credit where credit is due.

Y172 buckyswife: wow, that’s bizarre. Why would the Chron have an incorrect one? Do other online comics page have the incorrect one? In fact, could it be that the strip was sent to the colourists at the same time as the editor, and only the B&W version able to be corrected before being sent to print? There is a tale here.
Niall
October 21st, 2009 at 3:16 pm [Reply]

4. The Diva: A propos of nothing, but I’m constantly amused how English calls it “the big O” while the French call it “la petite mort” (the little death). Changes in cultural perspective.

39. 150: Not even nearly the first meta thing in strips. But the first time in Cathy, a strip we never expected to ever be meta. It’s even mildly amusing, though Cathy herself sucks all the fun out of it.

40. buckyswife: “the object of his punchy desire” – bravo.

49. anonymous: you didn’t read today’s Garfield, did you? “A Garfield being successfully zinged by Jon” is equally multiverse-ending, I think.

60. buckyswife: Hmm, I was trying to get towards that, but my thoughts derailed. But I guess only invasive medical procedures necessitating a work absence might pique curiosity, while a colonoscopy is outpatient and no one needs to know it even happened. In other words, Alice: if you’re willing to talk about your shit to others, you don’t have any ground to stop them talking of their shit, or any other orifices.
Niall
October 21st, 2009 at 3:17 pm [Reply]

…I just thought of something: what if the A3G make-over storyline is a change-over storyline, preparing us for… a new artist? One slightly younger (say, in their 60s) and able to gather fashion concepts from closer to now (say, in the ’60s)?
Poteet
October 21st, 2009 at 3:24 pm [Reply]

# 50 sarah — To which comic do you refer? I’m intrigued.
Farley's Revenge
October 21st, 2009 at 3:24 pm [Reply]

*BREAKING NEWS*

*ahCHOO*Snerk*

Hayfever sucks.

*NOW BACK TO YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED SNARKING*

That’ll teach me to be all healthy-like and go for a walk when the wind is blowing.
Poteet
October 21st, 2009 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

S-M — Why in the names of ancient deities doesn’t Peter Parker find a better way to make money?? I realize that fighting supervillains can play hell with one’s schedule, but he doesn’t even do it that often. And I find it very hard to believe that freelance photo attempts (that never seem to work out) peddled to just one person (who is arguably insane) are his only options.
commodorejohn
October 21st, 2009 at 3:30 pm [Reply]

Ah, it’s Volunteer Day in the comics, where we learn all about volunteering! Because apparently reading a comic strip about volunteering would be sufficient to convince lazy, selfish bastards who are just planning to sit around *gasp* spending their time however they want *shock* to get out and…um, volunteer. I guess.

A3G – I don’t know for certain what the mystical quality that makes for good TV is, but I know that the opposite of it is Tommie.

Archie – tells us that you don’t have to be competent at anything to volunteer! Even people with some kind of disability that causes them to involuntarily engage in Three Stooges-style slapstick hijinks can volunteer! After all, the other volunteers need something to help clean up, and you can provide it!

BBlue – Baby Blues cuts straight to the heart of the matter: you don’t have to just volunteer your own time! You can volunteer other people’s time, too! Oh, sure, they might point out that that is not (in the strictest sense) volunteering so much as being volunteered, but you can usually badger them into it with a few choice homilies and platitudes about “making a difference.” Ask Delta from Luann if you need help; she knows all about that!

BrS – Okay, does Brenda Starr even know what’s going on in Brenda Starr anymore?

Crock – shows us that just getting other people to volunteer is in itself volunteer work! Volunteering is great and all, but someone has to make sure that everybody does it!

Curtis – has actually been comparatively subtle in its volunteering theme, working it naturally into an interesting storyline instead of blaring VOLUNTEERISM IS THE NEW AMERICAN WAY with neon lights and a marching band. Come on, Curtis, get on the ball! You don’t really think you’re going to get anybody to do any volunteering by portraying it as an interesting and rewarding personal activity, do you?

H&L – Trixie was afraid she was turning into Marvin. Turns out she’s actually some sort of interactive decoration.

JP – What.

Love Is… – volunteering to share your clothing, even if it means compromising on the whole “underage public nudity” thing.

Luann – wants you to know that the President has covert operatives in your neighborhood to make sure you volunteer! …wait, what? Did Bruce Tinsley and Greg Evans switch strips?

MT – You know, I’ve occasionally suspected that Rusty is a ventriloquist’s dummy, but I’ve never been more certain than I am today. (The funny part about panel one is, you can clearly see a break in the word balloon where the tail was supposed to go, but for some reason Elrod left that open and deliberately put it somewhere else. Fascinating.)

MW – Mary Worth has always been at the heart of what volunteerism is all about: fixing other people’s problems for them, whether they want it or not, because you know what they need much, much better than they do.

PBS – volunteers to actually be a funny comic strip instead of a public service announcement with pictures. Very kind of you, Pastis.

Pluggers – If Pluggers weren’t such idiots/technophobes, they wouldn’t have to look through the goddamn Yellow Pages to find what they need.

RMMD – HOLY GOD IN HEAVEN I DID NOT NEED THAT NOSTRIL SHOT

Shoe – wants you to volunteer to put the miserable out of their misery!

Edison Lee – volunteered every last ounce of its humor potential to Ziggy. This has not made a noticeable difference in either strip.
Farley's Revenge
October 21st, 2009 at 3:38 pm [Reply]

It was once assumed that I would volunteer full time for no other reason than it was expected of me. I quickly corrected such wrongheaded thinking by informing the person that the only people for whom I willingly work fulltime for free were my family members and even then I bitch heartily while doing so.

I was never asked again.

I believe in volunteering…as long as one wants to volunteer. Forced volunteerism is a contradiction of terms IMO.
Poteet
October 21st, 2009 at 3:40 pm [Reply]

RMMD — I must admit I’ve never seen a half-hearted flirtation attempt during a violent rainstorm while looking for Alzheimer’s patients who are at one of several golf courses. I suspect this storyline might be the result of some drinking, a wager, and a dart game involving four categorized wheels.

Next I want to see a half-hearted murder attempt during a blizzard while searching for a kidnap victim who is tied up and hidden in one of several BabyGap stockrooms.
Pozzo
October 21st, 2009 at 3:44 pm [Reply]

I’m not sure how birthdays are celebrated in prison, but I’m betting it involves some Sarge-and-Cookie style “cake”.
AhClem
October 21st, 2009 at 3:52 pm [Reply]

MT – Actually, there were TWO mistakes in today’s strip:

1) ALL the dialogue boxes should be pointing towards Mark.

2) Mark has inhaled too much campfire smoke and, because of the brain damage, is now having an animated conversation with himself, using two different voices. They simply forgot to draw the sock puppets on his hands.
tuffenuf
October 21st, 2009 at 3:53 pm [Reply]

Bury the bones of his victims? Naah, I thought it looked more like he took a big “marma-dump”.
bats :[
October 21st, 2009 at 3:53 pm [Reply]

106. Niall: there’s an automotive tire franchise here in the Southwestern US by the name of “Big O Tires.” It’s a source of constant juvenile snickering (well, for me and mr. bats :[ at least).

DT: I don’t so much want the tiger to win, but I do want the tiger to get Mr. Pops.
And Thorax.
MrGuy
October 21st, 2009 at 3:54 pm [Reply]

Hmm. Cathy’s mother-in-law is breaking the fourth wall; it least it seems that way, since nobody else bats an eyelid at her multitude of arms. Therefore, she must be slowly but surely gaining medium awareness along with her newfound insanity.

Cathy’s Mother-in-Law is Deadpool.
mvg
October 21st, 2009 at 4:08 pm [Reply]

Poteet (113): COTW.
gnome de blog
October 21st, 2009 at 4:16 pm [Reply]

The Big O is Oscar Robertson. President Obama, Oprah Winfrey and whatever else are mere copycats.

113 Poteet: You can get most of that in any Brenda Starr story arc.
mr 12 oz can
October 21st, 2009 at 4:29 pm [Reply]

THING having nothing to do after vic mizzys funeral decides to pal around with adrian and the mary worth family .
mr 12 oz can
October 21st, 2009 at 4:33 pm [Reply]

hey mark every time you got the fire going you only have a coffee pot going . is that how your cooking all those fish your catching . no wonder rusty looks malnourished and blank . just go home you ranger rick wannabe
KarMann
October 21st, 2009 at 4:37 pm [Reply]

@Niall #35: “Sorry Sally, but a colonoscopy only involves one person;…” If your colonoscopy only involves one person, then, in keeping with the “other theme” in Crankshaft and Tiger today, ur doin it rong.
jumper
October 21st, 2009 at 4:39 pm [Reply]

So is Rusty “la petite Mark” or is Mark “the big O my god, Rusty’s a freakin’ mutant?”
fishmorgjp
October 21st, 2009 at 4:43 pm [Reply]

#70 Écureuil Écumant: I read a theory somewhere that maintained that a squirrel and its tail are actually two distinct entities; in time of alarm, the squirrel and tail cannot agree on which way to go, thus causing them to dash to the wrong place.
StoutHearted
October 21st, 2009 at 4:51 pm [Reply]

I think Mark Trail often starts conversations by asking himself questions. Tomorrow’s panel will start “Well, Mark, shall we continue to ignore your wife who is patiently waiting at home to tramp about the woods with your young male protege? Absolutely!”
MolyBendum
October 21st, 2009 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

#105 Niall – Yeah, I mentioned it, it went something like:
Me: “Who’s that at the end of the table?”
Pastis: “Oh that’s some editorial cartoonist. Down there at the other end is Jeff Keane. He’s the one whose comic I make fun of all the time.”
M: “Yeah, I know.”
P: “Oh.”
M: “Yeah I go on the Comics Curmudgeon website about every day.” [yes, this was my segue]
P: “Oh really?”
M: “Yep.”
P: “I did a comic about….. You, like, post stuff on there?”
M: “Yeah.”
P: “Huhn.”

This is why I left out a lot of details. I’m not a big conversationalist and I was kind of tongue-tied meeting him anyways. We didn’t know for sure until that morning if they’d show up, and I didn’t know if he’d be one of the ones that came here until I walked in. At least, poor preparation is my excuse for coming off like a weenie.
KarMann
October 21st, 2009 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

Baby Blues: I almost forgot the first thing that popped into my head while reading the first panel: WTF is a “service coach”, and how do I land a gig like that?
DamienBixlan
October 21st, 2009 at 5:11 pm [Reply]

# Ms Avery: I think David Lynch would read today’s Mark Trail and say “Woah, that shit is WAY too weird for me”. And then he’d burn the newspaper. While rolling himself naked in cereals and milk. Because, you know, he’s David Lynch.
Muffaroo
October 21st, 2009 at 5:20 pm [Reply]

9CL – Performance art. Like a comedian who tells jokes that aren’t funny so that he can make a crack about the lack of laughter it gets, he produces weeks of dreck in the sure expectation that someone will criticize it and he can bitch about it. “How very nearly inspired. How almost satisfying.”

AD – Not getting panel 3. Not getting it at all. Volunteer?

Dick – That’s so nice of Fee Fi to volunteer to give the cat a dangling object to swat at.

Family – “Mommy, how do I get superglue off my chin?”

Herb – Try not to gloat too much, Josh! He’s only a comic character.

Mark – Obviously, the balloon is some kind of AI that seeks out the most lifelike face in any panel and points to it, assuming they must be talking. Sometimes it points to a bird or animal. Once in a while, it points at a rock or tree. On rare occasions, it points to Rusty and must be fixed.

Marmaduke – Oh, volunteer Marmaduke, you’re just a volunteer big old dog. Volunteer.

Mary – There’s a new experimental operation, Adrian, in which the knowledge of how much you love and want to marry him can be surgically implanted in his head before he croaks. It may kill him, but these are the chances we have to take.
Muffaroo
October 21st, 2009 at 5:22 pm [Reply]

Pluggers – Back in the dusk of the vacuum tube age, I thought someone should write a Tube Swipe-stitution Manual to go alongside the better known Tube Substitution Manual. One would look up a tube by number in my manual, and it would tell what sort of sets you could steal one out of.

Rose – Do it, Jimbo! No jury would convict you!

Slylock – Begin with the letter P? I see pet pig, pet bird, pet dog, pet duck, pet cat, pet snake… and they’re all patients, so they count twice.

Spidey – “For the last time, Bub, I ain’t sending you no %@#$ dream!”

Mibbitmaker @y144 – Please, Tom… (notice I didn’t say ‘Batty?’) That’s a reference to Lord Peter Wimsey, right? The Nine Tailors? Batty Thomas?

Mr Foofram @37 – Characters in Mark Trail are generally portrayed standing behind logs, boulders, porcupines, whatever is convenient.

I’ll wager that they walk like mannequins on off-center skates rolling behind a hedge, and … Good LORD! (choke!) They’re Synchro-Vox characters, like Clutch Cargo and Captain Fathom! I’ll bet if you magnified the strip, you’d see that Mark has a real mouth (with lipstick) that creeps around while it talks. No wonder the speech balloons don’t cooperate. They’re creeped out!
Dingo
October 21st, 2009 at 5:26 pm [Reply]

Niall #35: I’ve seen videos that take place in Toronto so I know it’s not as backward as you make it out to be but sex — SEX — can involve only one person or up to several dozen. It depends upon the beer you’re serving and the canapes. Personally, I cannot imagine Ted Forth having satisfying sex unless he’s alone surrounded by Hello Kitty merchandise. Sally Forth looks like the type of woman who’d beg OTR truckers to slather her back with canned yams while having pigsex against a forest preserve picnic table in the dark of night.
Violet
October 21st, 2009 at 5:29 pm [Reply]

I love the way they make absolutely no bones about Gil’s apathy and inattention to details when it comes to his players:

Gil: So your brother Davey–
Duncan: Danny.
Gil: Right. And he’s, what 24?
Duncan: 23.
Gil: Sure, whatever. So you’re upset because your sister’s pregnant, is that it?
Duncan: Brother. In jail.
Gil: Yeah, that’s rough. You gotta…um, yeah, dare to say no to drugs, Dustin.
Duncan: Duncan.
Gil: Shut up.
Baka Gaijin
October 21st, 2009 at 5:34 pm [Reply]

#132 Dingo: That’s way beyond TMI. Way beyond. Besides, with Ted it would be Star Wars figurines.

#131 Muffaroo on Slylock: You forgot “putz,” “pussy,” and “PU! The dog owner cut a major projectile fart.”
Écureuil Écumant
October 21st, 2009 at 5:36 pm [Reply]

125 fishmorgjp says: “I read a theory somewhere that maintained that a squirrel and its tail are actually two distinct entities; in time of alarm, the squirrel and tail cannot agree on which way to go, thus causing them to dash to the wrong place.”

That sounds right, and if true, then it means I might have cured one (in the only similar incident, 12 years ago). That one had a bit more nitro in his tank, so he managed to escape — but sans tail.

Which ought to’ve fixed the schizoid commands, but hmm, I wonder if he’d have been plagued by Phantom Tail Syndrome though.
Ukulele Ike
October 21st, 2009 at 5:39 pm [Reply]

Thorp: He’s turned twenty-three in prison
Doing life without parole.
No-one could steer him right
But Mama tried, Mama tried.
Mama tried to raise him better,
But her pleading he denied.
That leaves only him to blame
‘Cos Mama tried.

9CL: Hang on! *I* dislike Solange intensely. I agree Mark and Seth are pretty much okay, though.
Ted
October 21st, 2009 at 5:39 pm [Reply]

OMG, the new A3G line is going to be even more awesome than the Brady Bunch episode where Jan ‘stands out’ by wearing an afro wig!

Afro Tommy! Afro Tommy!
Écureuil Écumant
October 21st, 2009 at 5:43 pm [Reply]

127 MolyBendum says : “I’m not a big conversationalist and I was kind of tongue-tied meeting him anyways…At least, poor preparation is my excuse for coming off like a weenie.”

Au contraire. Minimizing one’s radar cross section is always prudent when traversing new terrain.
zerowolf
October 21st, 2009 at 5:55 pm [Reply]

Mark Trail: I’m so glad Chucky has got a new gig after the Child’s Play franchise went under.
AhClem
October 21st, 2009 at 6:07 pm [Reply]

#131 Muffaroo (re: Pluggers) -
That would have been very useful! And according to my dog-eared*, yellowed copy of the RCA Receiving Tube Manual, the 12SA7 is a pentagrid converter with an octal base. He must be trying to fix an AM table radio.

* Dog-eared, in this case, refers to the condition of the book, not a description of Mr. Plugger.
AMC
October 21st, 2009 at 6:19 pm [Reply]

#70 – Écureuil Écumant

They say even a blind squirrel sometimes finds a nut. More commonly, I suspect, they wander out into the road and don’t realize where they are.

Jack will be disappointed we didn’t recycle him.
gleeb
October 21st, 2009 at 6:26 pm [Reply]

The Other Coast: Filthy proles ruin everything, am I right?
Jamus the Bartender
October 21st, 2009 at 6:28 pm [Reply]

9CL: OOOO…It’s On !!
Mary Worth: Yeah, Adrian, it’s really selfish of Detective Scott to get shot like that, I bet he did it on purpose, just so he’ll never know you wanna marry him. Christ, the girls of Old Town in Sin City were much more thoughtful than you, and they were hookers.
bats :[
October 21st, 2009 at 6:34 pm [Reply]

121. Yes, long live Vic Mizzy (or at least his musical excellence)!
Mollie
October 21st, 2009 at 6:34 pm [Reply]

133 — Violet, I got the same vibe. I love the jump to the third panel, where Gil is relating the conversation to Mrs. Thorp. “So he’s all, I’m laying bare my emotional distress to you, blah blah, my brother’s in jail and I cry all the time, waaaah. Poor kid, right? It’s all he can think about and absolutely no one gives a shit. Especially not me.”
The Ridger
October 21st, 2009 at 6:36 pm [Reply]

Voluntarism??? For volunteerism? Since when?

FWIW, here’s what MW says:

the principle or system of supporting or doing something by voluntary action or of relying upon voluntary action : as a : a theory that conceives will to be the dominant factor in experience or in the constitution of the world — compare FICHTEANISM, INTELLECTUALISM, SCHOPENHAUERISM, SCOTISM b (1) : the principle of supporting a religious system and its institutions by voluntary association and effort rather than by state aid or patronage (2) : insistence upon this principle as alone consistent with true religious freedom c : a principle calling for development of union labor relations with employers by free choice of the workers and without outside influence, assistance, or interference; also : the principle of free collective bargaining without governmental imposition of terms
The Ridger
October 21st, 2009 at 6:36 pm [Reply]

Oops. That’s the definition of “voluntarism”.
Mags
October 21st, 2009 at 6:46 pm [Reply]

I read “brother” as “betrothed” in Gil Thorp. That would have been so much more interesting. What a let down…he does seem to have one earring though.
odinthor
October 21st, 2009 at 6:55 pm [Reply]

I want to join in the thanks to Vic Mizzy, always cool, always a free spirit. Rest in Peace (snap, snap)!

NYerCC. —

(1.) If I have to tell you about chips in bed one more time . . . !
___

(2.) Well, I’m sure He would have mentioned the one about the toilet seat if He had thought you were really listening!
Joe Btfsplk
October 21st, 2009 at 7:19 pm [Reply]

Oh, great… When did Zombie Redeye heave its reeking carcass forth to stagger mindlessly about upon the earth once again?
commodorejohn
October 21st, 2009 at 7:29 pm [Reply]

You know, if I ever come into possession of a monkey, I’m going to name him Brooke, and I will put him into a cage with a supply of Bristol board and pens, and the required eight-foot stacks of Zip-A-Tone. I’ll walk by his cage every now and again and say, “hey, Brooke? You know what? You suck.” Then he’ll screech and fling his poop at me.

I will respond, “no, Brooke, my criticism of you has nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that you don’t entertain me, since your reactions are in fact highly entertaining. My problem with your body of work is that it basically deifies characters who are selfish, manipulative monsters, and it is profoundly self-indulgent.”

Then he will screech and fling poop at me some more.
Écureuil Écumant
October 21st, 2009 at 7:29 pm [Reply]

B. F. Dog: It’s fascinating that the ‘Duke knows instinctively the proper dimensions of a human grave.
LUJBEM FEJF
October 21st, 2009 at 7:36 pm [Reply]

When are the comics going to take on a real cause? Like say… Disestablishmentarianism. Damn Church of England! We all need to do something. Come on Family Circus are you with me?!
LUJBEM FEJF
October 21st, 2009 at 7:38 pm [Reply]

Ooops, sorry. That’s antidisestablishmentarianism. Sometimes I forget which side I’m on on that issue.
Écureuil Écumant
October 21st, 2009 at 7:41 pm [Reply]

I really like the idea of sending Elrod a giant stuffed squirrel. I haven’t been able to find a true county-fair behemoth yet — biggest so far is a big 12 inch.

But I dunno about this one. It looks a hell of a lot more like a Tanuki to me, complete with a suggestively-testicular big belly.
Emily K [Riff Chick]
October 21st, 2009 at 8:03 pm [Reply]

Lord help me, that “Cathy” is actually kinda funny. It’s so random.
Emily K [Riff Chick]
October 21st, 2009 at 8:09 pm [Reply]

As someone who marched competitively for 6 years, including once through a “monsoon” in Bristol RI (I thought I’d never be dry again…), the Westview band is deplorable. Their horn angles are the same as their clarinet angles. They converse during the show. And what kind of staff are they using, has-beens from 1975?? What competitive ensemble uses high-step technique anymore? Who the hel is designing their uniforms these days?? Are they under the age of 45?? For crimony’s sake, time to get into the 21st (hell, even the late 20th) century, band.
Simon
October 21st, 2009 at 8:15 pm [Reply]

MW: Having found the proof copy of future cartoons in the back of a taxi, have to say I am looking forward enormously to the upcoming “Scott has amnesia” story line. The moment his eyes flutter open and his first words are “Who the hell are you three, and for God’s sake leave that catheter alone” represents a high point in the annals of Mary Worthdom . Of course the subsequent “Scott comes out”, “Scott and Dr Good enter a civil partnership” and “Adrian crushed, turns to crime and hooks up with drug dealer who shot Scott” storylines also offer some outstanding moments.
Uncle Lumpy
October 21st, 2009 at 8:17 pm [Reply]

#154 LUJBEM FEJF –

The Lambada interim’s sin is a snit.
Ukulele Ike
October 21st, 2009 at 8:24 pm [Reply]

Fashion Police: Thank you very much for replying to my inebriated queries of last evening.

I agree that men look good in good hats when properly attired. And that is why I think that Len of Edge City looks a prime doofus wearing that thing with his athletic jacket. Ah, well, he lost it today. Heh.

I think I am getting over my juvenile obsession with Yenny. Excellent call with the Capp reference. She reminded me poignantly of a blue-haired Moonbeam McSwine.
buckyswife
October 21st, 2009 at 8:26 pm [Reply]

158 Simon: But what about the part where Dr. Jeff, rejected by the youthful simulacrum of his long-dead lover, turns his medical skills to evil purposes and aids his daughter in her drug-mongering schemes?
Ukulele Ike
October 21st, 2009 at 8:27 pm [Reply]

Riff Chick @ # 157: And WHAT are those bizarro horns they’re playing? Too big for trumpets, too small for marching trombones.

– Uke Ike, erstwhile Sousaphonist.
sugarpie
October 21st, 2009 at 8:44 pm [Reply]

GThorp It took me a couple of minutes to figure out what the fuck Gil and Mrs. Gil were doing in the last panel: folding laundry.

I can guaran-damn-tee my high school coaches, Tommy L. Johnson and L… L… L… Lloyd Long (he stuttered) would have pounded Gil into dog meat had they caught him folding laundry. Pounded him while laughing like tripping hyenas the whole time AND making fun of his genitals.

And, while I’m at it, what the hell happened to those two backwards children the Thorps used to have? Have they been disappeared to the Island of Useless Comic Children along with Chad Duncan?
Simon
October 21st, 2009 at 8:58 pm [Reply]

#161 Buckyswife – Yes, you are spot on. A dramatic storyline that has Jeff and Adrian on the run from the law. Ends with a crossover storyline with the Phantom who brings the evil pair to justice. Adrian now has more reason to hide her face with her hands – no amount of make-up can hide the skull ring imprint on her jaw.
LUJBEM FEJF
October 21st, 2009 at 9:02 pm [Reply]

#159- UL – Very nice! I was looking at that and thinking, “What the hell is he talking about?” Kinda like when I read Dick Tracy.

Here one for you……..
bortaS bIr jablu’DI’ reH QaQqu’ nay’
Just wait and see what I’m talking about.

Oh Boy! This is going to be great! (Flounder)
buckyswife
October 21st, 2009 at 9:07 pm [Reply]

164 Simon: Unless, of course, they make the fatal error of fleeing into Lost Forest, using an abandoned fishing cabin as a hideout until a freakish “child” discovers them, leading to the inevitable Trailian punch-fest, which will rearrange Jeff’s face in ways that Moy and Giella haven’t even dreamed of.

Mary, meanwhile, has moved on to the next storyline, leaving a trail of broken lives and salmon-square detritus in her wake.
Tristram Draper
October 21st, 2009 at 9:18 pm [Reply]

Does mark spend so much time around animals that he forgets people can talk? Maybe he is having a one sided conversation, filling in Rusty’s lines like one might do with a pet dog.
Big Sims
October 21st, 2009 at 9:23 pm [Reply]

You’re on fire today Josh! You had me laughing uncontrollably for at least 10 minutes. Way to read the funnies!

(Late to the party – work then school today)
Emily K [Riff Chick]
October 21st, 2009 at 9:39 pm [Reply]

Uke: There are a number of horns too big for trumpets and not trombones. I played a couple of them.

• Flugelhorn
• Mellophone
• Bugles that are lower than soprano but higher than baritone
Ukulele Ike
October 21st, 2009 at 9:49 pm [Reply]

Those ain’t no flugelhorns.
AhClem
October 21st, 2009 at 9:59 pm [Reply]

#169 Emily K [Riff Chick] – Never mind the mellophone. I want to see a marching band playing nothing but Mellotrons!
Simon
October 21st, 2009 at 10:03 pm [Reply]

#166 Buckyswife: I like your ending better. A much better crossover opportunity.
Phil
October 21st, 2009 at 10:06 pm [Reply]

I think it’s no coincidence that the funniest Cathy has ever got happens to be on the day when Cathy herself has nothing to do with the proceedings whatsoever.
Toronto
October 21st, 2009 at 10:36 pm [Reply]

Squirrels on bike paths don’t usually find a nut – they go for the spokes. Then the fork. (They can break a steel bike fork, but only once per squirrel.)

Speaking of which, I saw a stuffed beaver yesterday. Despite it sitting in a tiny birch bark canoe, I immediately thought of “Naked Gun.” Then Mark Trail.
NoahSnark
October 21st, 2009 at 10:36 pm [Reply]

Somewhere in the swamp an alligator is telling his friend, “The big tan thing got away? Gee Phil, you sure are unlucky.”
mollificent
October 21st, 2009 at 10:39 pm [Reply]

Just checking in…really funny stuff, everyone. :) Wish I had more to contribute. My snark seems to have dried up this week. *sigh*
Anonymous
October 21st, 2009 at 10:40 pm [Reply]

@89, queek: And he lived at 22, I believe. 22 Twain.
ladadog
October 21st, 2009 at 10:41 pm [Reply]

RMMD: Everytime I see Becka and the big goof in that car (which is every other day, since this strip alternates between them and the dementia sufferers asking for food and offering golf lessons) all I can think about is John Fowles’ The Collector. And it really creeps me out. Please come back, Rex, all is forgiven.
Marion Delgado
October 21st, 2009 at 10:45 pm [Reply]

One Big Happy’s onion show and tell should have been emerging from a big phone in the sky held by the author.
commodorejohn
October 21st, 2009 at 10:50 pm [Reply]

#171 AhClem – Oh hell yes. I don’t care how damn impractical that is, it just needs to happen.
Alison
October 21st, 2009 at 11:00 pm [Reply]

Cosmopolitan magazine once did a feature about the Oscars and called the article “The big O-no, not THAT one!” I guess Bernice doesn’t read Cosmo. Although, she should, judging by her hair and wardrobe.

I hate Cathy so bad. I can’t even be clever about snarking on Cathy. I just…hate it.
Josh
October 21st, 2009 at 11:12 pm [Reply]

#153/4 LUJBEM FEJF — I simultaneously hate and am smug that I know this, but an antidisestablishmentarianist would be pro-Church of England — they would be against disestablishing the church (i.e., against removing its status as the official tax-supported church of England).

So, if you’re going to be damning the Church of England, that makes you an disestablishmentarianist. Don’t be afraid to join our polysyllabic cause for separation of Church and State in jolly old England!

Josh
Uncle Lumpy
October 21st, 2009 at 11:24 pm [Reply]

#182 Josh, #153 LUJBEM FEJF –

Well, an establishmentarianist would be a friend of the church (emphatically not a Friend, and emphatically not of the Church). An antidisestablishmentarianist might be opposed to disestablishment on other grounds, e.g., because they are against change. Else why the double negative?
Uncle Lumpy
October 21st, 2009 at 11:33 pm [Reply]

#164 FEJF –

Hm, Klingon. (Googles) Ah – tomorrow’s Jumble!
Aviatrix
October 21st, 2009 at 11:53 pm [Reply]

FEJF@165 : bortaS bIr jabluDI’ reH tlhejnIs salmon squaremey qaqqu’ nay’ net poQchugh.
Poteet
October 22nd, 2009 at 12:18 am [Reply]

10/22 MW — Nooooooooooo!
bats :[
October 22nd, 2009 at 12:42 am [Reply]

Oh, god, NO! Not a Mary Worth story!!!!!!!!! RUN!
Girl Reporter
October 22nd, 2009 at 12:49 am [Reply]

Roll On – Big O;
Get that juice up to Lawsons in 14 hours;
One man sleeps, while the other man drives;
on the non-stop Lawson run;
And the cold cold juice in the tank truck caboose;
stays as fresh as the Florida sun;
Roll On – Big O
Get that juice up to Lawson’s in 14 hours.

You’re right. It does sound filthy.
Girl Reporter
October 22nd, 2009 at 1:08 am [Reply]

My mornings got happier some years ago when I started unfocusing my eyes and sliding them past Cathy without reading it. Then the Local Paper did me the favor of dropping it so that I didn’t even have to spend that much effort avoiding it. I’ve hated it since I saw CG on some talk show in the late ’80s, when she mattered, nattering on about what ALL women think and how ALL women feel and what ALL women want. “FU, Gueswite” (and no, I don’t care enough to look up the correct spelling), I said out loud to the TV, “you are not the Lorax of me”.

So, today’s genuine funny is an abberation? I don’t need to start peeking, do I?
bats :[
October 22nd, 2009 at 1:09 am [Reply]

186. Poteet: great minds think (and shudder) alike.
Or maybe not…
athena
October 22nd, 2009 at 1:20 am [Reply]

The writer of Mary Worth really does hate that Adrian character: First she has her heart broken by a con artist, then the new love of her life is shot and put in a coma, and now she has to listen to a rambling, pointless story from Mary herself.
Poteet
October 22nd, 2009 at 1:20 am [Reply]

# 190 bats:[ — Har! More evidence that yours is a great mind.

And now, Moy and Giella, I’m begging you. On my knees, I’m begging you. Not another story from Mary’s childhood. Please! Have mercy!
Skip Bittman
October 22nd, 2009 at 1:22 am [Reply]

In a darker ending than Mary Worth is known for, Adrian commits suicide at minute 48 of Mary’s story. Scott wakes up just after they discover the body. Jeff “consoles” Scott, and discovers his true nature. Jeff and Scott move to Taos to open a boutique. The next storyline revolves around Mary’s many suitors. One of them is possessed by the unquiet spirit of Aldo Kelrast. He slaughters Mary by cutting out her still-beating heart and eating it.
Poteet
October 22nd, 2009 at 1:39 am [Reply]

10/22

9CL — I personally just cannot ever get enough pontificating by Abdomen. Wait a minute — that’s not his name…

GA — And the next Bird tune inspired by Gertie will be titled “That Old Devil Flop Sweat.”

LUANN — I think I’ve actually heard of Metallica, which I assume means that no one of Luann’s supposed age would really like it.

STONE SOUP — I couldn’t agree more.
Mibbitmaker
October 22nd, 2009 at 1:40 am [Reply]

#131 (Muffaroo): Nope. I just call Batiuk “Batty” as a snark name when I’m critical. This week (not seen the new ones yet) he’s earned a respectful first name, non-punned.

Kinda why I never use “Pastisprime” to refer to the creator of PBS.
True Fable
October 22nd, 2009 at 2:10 am [Reply]

I can’t help but think that some of the comics people, like A3G’s Margaret Shulock, are cheerfully firing volleys across our bows. “Your clothes are just boring, Tommie” is EXACTLY what we’ve been saying all along. I’m loving this.

Bald Nice anime style girl in panel one, but Dad is squicking me out in the last panel. Roll your tongue back in your head, Pops.

I don’t snarl at Dick Tracy because I don’t care

HotC Knock it off, Heart; you were going as a Charlie Brown ghost before Dean showed up. At least his costume is awesome.

Scenes from Suburban Hell In Suburban Hell, there are no bathroom doors.

Fist O Justice Theater Either Bob is going to learn an Important Lesson, or he’s going to have to rescue Mark again. Either way, The Right Fist O Justice will be flying very soon.

Mary, TRUE BRINGER OF MEDDLE and platitudes! And long dumb stories that go nowhere but she’ll force a Lesson from them anyway! We asked for it! We got it! Mary is involved in her strip now and there’s no holding her back. “I used to wear ugly unattractive haircuts, too! And I was desperate enough to fall for every man I came across! Then I gave up and settled for a man with a metric fuckton of cash, and that was that!”

Kit Walker, Targeted Ranger! What’s with the half-circle around Kit’s head? Is that his Phantom Sense tingling? Is that a halo starting to form? Or can it be that he turned into a lifesized bobble head doll?

Rednex Hey, I need a deal like that. No kidding, I’m afoot.

Rex Morgan, MIA I’ll bet Tim filled out his e-harmony information in record time.
Jym the Wildlife Man
October 22nd, 2009 at 2:12 am [Reply]

=v= Cathy (Josh): I never linked the flailing Cathy arm thing with Hindu deities, but now that you point it out, it’s so clear!

Having avoided this strip as much as possible, I was at first confused by the way Cathy’s mother morphed into looking and acting so much like Cathy, but a peek into the archives reveals that these are Irving’s parents, who have apparently become the grandparent-types in a childfree version of Marvin.

This, of course, means that I’ve replaced my confusion with revulsion over Irving’s Oedipal fixation. Recall that Irving used to look exactly like his dad, but don’t expect an Electra-in-law plotline: Cathy considered Irving unsuitable for marriage until he bought himself some Rogaine®.
True Fable
October 22nd, 2009 at 2:13 am [Reply]

I like the little intrusive narration box, warning us that “the reason!” is coming up soon. Sure, it will be a reason that stretches the suspension of disbelief until it snaps hard enough to slap us with the recoil, but that means its typical quality Spiderman work. That is to say, nonexistent.
True Fable
October 22nd, 2009 at 2:14 am [Reply]

Children of the Circle Wait until they put you on the rack, Billy. You’ll think you’re in Omigodithurtz.
Mibbitmaker
October 22nd, 2009 at 2:27 am [Reply]

The 22nd:

9CL: I’m going to start refering to Thorax as an Excelsior Rat.

A3G: Ruby said it FOR us! I smell a trend…

Blondie: That old buzzard’s youth included a Nehru jacket? I was only 5 at that time, and this STILL makes me feel old!!

H&J: No, it isn’t (unless you really are wrong, and not wrong-because-you-are-a-male-in-pop-culture)

HotC: There’s a difference?

MT: No, Bob — not with the POACHING MAFIA!

MW: Mary’s stories are officially classified as “war crimes”!

MC: The kid makes me sadder — the comic books I like aren’t the ones the kid’s referring to (unless he meant something like Ghost World…)

Zits: Yabba Dabba Don’t!
Mibbitmaker
October 22nd, 2009 at 2:32 am [Reply]

#200 (me), re: HotC: Actually, there is a difference:

I respect Halloween costumes.
Lesser Whark
October 22nd, 2009 at 2:42 am [Reply]

FW: Like the rest of you, I hope that the water keeps rising at the same rate, so it goes from ankles on Tuesday, knees on Wednesday and waist today, on to shoulders on Friday, neck-deep on Saturday and everyone’s drowned on Sunday. However, I think this is actually Batiuk punishing us for demanding humor. He’s created a ‘joke’, he’s repeated the joke every day this week, and he’ll keep repeating it until we cry Uncle and ask for more death and cancer. Also, why is this girl in the band when she has not yet played a single note? Why is she talking to Cody while he does play, when my experience of brass musicians is that they’re impervious to external stimuli?
Farley's Revenge
October 22nd, 2009 at 3:03 am [Reply]

MW: Good grief. For someone who’s so devastated by the impending death of The Love Of Her Life, Adrian is sure spending as much time as possible perfecting her drama whore-dom skills instead of hovering at Det. Future Corpse’s bedside and boring him into a deeper coma with her declarations of Wuv, Twu Wuv.

Besides, Adrian’s weeping and wailing gives Mary the opening to launch into a rambling and incoherent story that has no real bearing on anything beyond Mary’s love of hearing her own voice. For that alone, Adrian deserves to be dragged into the parking lot and run over by an ambulance.
Farley's Revenge
October 22nd, 2009 at 3:24 am [Reply]

A3G: Ruby says Tommie’s clothes are “just” boring. Just? Ruby, honey, Tommie’s got boring down to an art. She took a vow of extreme boring many years ago and has been a faithful practitioner ever since. She’s a professional bore-meister. If Tommie suddenly stripped naked and started humping the sofa arm, the only notice anyone would take is to straighten the doily.
Farley's Revenge
October 22nd, 2009 at 3:30 am [Reply]

S4th: Ted brushes his teeth in the bedroom? Ew. I don’t want to think about where he spits the toothpaste.
True Fable
October 22nd, 2009 at 3:35 am [Reply]

Today is my birthday, and I got a little silver goat figurine from one of my sisters, and a goat embroidered on a hanky from a friend! Now if only I can get more comics to display goats, like this a couple of days ago…
Jym the Wildlife Man
October 22nd, 2009 at 3:38 am [Reply]

=73= Cathy (Joe Blevins): The usual Cathy sequence goes like this: Panel 1, intro; Panel 2, more of the same; Panel 3, culmination of Panels 1 and 2; Panel 4, one of a very short list of punchlines. However, when Guisewhite is feeling lazy, the culmination in Panel 3 takes the form of “Ack! Ack! Ack!” or “Chomp! Chomp! Chomp!” (as National Lampoon pointed out in the 1970s). The mini-porthole would appear to be a more recent variant form of this laziness. Less drawing.

=189= Cathy (Girl Reporter): I hear you, sister, even though, as a Wildlife Man, I’m technically not a sister. I understand unfocusing the eyes over that strip, but in the spirit of knowing one’s enemy, I have an alternative timesaving approach to reading this strip. It’s based on the aforementioned panel layout: just read the second panel. The first and third are superfluous, and the fourth is easily guessed.
MolyBendum
October 22nd, 2009 at 3:57 am [Reply]

#206 Happy Birthday True, and I think this is a GOAT in a comic.
Farley's Revenge
October 22nd, 2009 at 4:06 am [Reply]

#206True Fable: Happy birthday!
True Fable
October 22nd, 2009 at 4:50 am [Reply]

#208 MolyBendum – GOAT! Goat as king of all he surveys!

Thanks! This is going to be a good year, I can feel it :)
Fashion Police
October 22nd, 2009 at 4:54 am [Reply]

Many happy returns indeed, Mr. Fable!

We prefer to think of Ms. Shuloch as an unitiated member of the College of Comics Curmudgeon Cardinals. Not only has she contributed to Mr. Lumpy’s fundraiser and received her very own “What Would Margo Do?” bracelet, she outfitted Miss Thompson in electric blue!! Surely that is a sign.

We recall reading somewhere that Ms. Shuloch was not satisfied with Mr. Bolle’s fashion sense, and that she would like to restore Miss Thompson’s original verve. Miss Thompson was, once upon a time, first among equals in Apartment 3-G – the strip’s true protagonist. We look forward to the coming story with immense glee.

As for you Ms. Shuloch, you have begun well. Much is expected, but we have every confidence you will be up to the task.
Sheila Sternwell
October 22nd, 2009 at 4:59 am [Reply]

MW: Mary said “Let me tell you a story” and I said “AAARGH!” and my husband said “Hey, you okay in there?” True story.
True Fable
October 22nd, 2009 at 5:04 am [Reply]

#209 Farley’s Revenge & #211 Fashion Police – Thanks y’all! I was given several items of sartorial splendor, so I can walk down the streets of Greater Metropolitan Roopville without having “bumpkin” written all over my forehead. Oh, the fact will still be evident but it won’t be because I don’t clean up well. :)

Also, we will serve that more famous version of Potato-ade, Vodka, at the House of Fable this evening and on through the weekend, in the form of various concoctions. Y’all are invited!
Ed Dravecky
October 22nd, 2009 at 5:18 am [Reply]

Crankshaft: Batiuk should rename the strip “One Totally Mental Old Dude”.

Luann: Mrs. Horner is far more likely to be a Metallica fan than Luann.

Mary Worth: And with the laying on of hands, let the meddling begin!

MW2: Let us pray that “Let me tell you a story” is followed by “about a man named Jed, a poor mountaineer who barely kept his family fed.”
Big Sims
October 22nd, 2009 at 5:28 am [Reply]

Happy Birthday Truman Fable! I wish you many happy Goat returns!
yuudai
October 22nd, 2009 at 5:44 am [Reply]

“And he just turned 23 – IN PRISON!”

I’m not entirely convinced that Duncan’s brother is actually incarcerated. To me, it looks more like Duncan is just experimenting with a new, hip alternative to the classic ‘In my pants’-joke, leading to some wacky misunderstandings when people take him seriously – IN PRISON!

Lacking the sexual connotations of its predecessor (as well as anything resembling sense), the joke will, of course, fail spectacularly. But this IS Milford, after all, so that’s to be expected.
True Fable
October 22nd, 2009 at 5:49 am [Reply]

#215 Big Sims – thank you ! May all your goats be healthy! Man, I have missed hearing from you!
MolyBendum
October 22nd, 2009 at 6:01 am [Reply]

Archie – Archie looks like….someone serviced….all over him…. Never mind.

Ballard Street – I’m going to shrink this down, print out two of them, paste them to the insides of my eyelids and walk around laughing maniacally all day long.

Cathy – And Cathy is back to being Cathy. Where’s my fork….ahh, here it is….BLORK!

Crankshaft– Crank is a veddy sneegy pedophile.

Family Circle – The economy has really hit the Keane family hard if Bill has to shake Billy down to pay the electric bill.

Funky – I perfected Girl Reporter’s (#189) eye unfocusing method on FW in the early 80’s back when the strip was about was about these band jokes and whatever other idiocy. I might not be able to parse antidisestablishmentarianism, but I still feel like I didn’t completely waste my youth.

Jumble Josh – I couldn’t string the words into any meaningful witty satire, something between croon and fillet is throwing me off. Haha, I think I’m witty. Anyways, I can’t tell what’s on the t-shirt though (is it anything Jeff?).

One Big Happy – I absolutely love when kids fall over for no reason. Like in Baby Blues when Wren just falls backwards, I laugh. I laugh when it happens in real life, too, but I don’t think we’ll talk about that.
Lucky
October 22nd, 2009 at 6:01 am [Reply]

FC: I thought this would be the best Family Circus ever but then I saw the caption. In any case, daddy Keane’s grin suggests that Billy is about get dropped on his head, which warms my dark, dark heart.

Garfield: Um, Jon, I think that might be because he’s a cat, not because he’s a particularily lazy one. But don’t worry, if you keep that up I’m sure Liz will send some nice men in white coats to take care of you.

HtH: And Chris Browne enjoys not having to write a gag.

Marvin: Just when I thought Marvin couldn’t get any worse, he turns out to be a teabagger.

MC: Okay, now this is why you shouldn’t draw anthro fish from the waist down. The obvious question of how they’re supposed to walk around is so very unnerving. The fact that Jeff and his son aren’t wearing any pants doesn’t help either.
John C Fremont
October 22nd, 2009 at 6:37 am [Reply]

Happy birthday, TF! If there were goats in my neck of the woods, I’d skritch one behind the ears in your honor. In the absense of goats, I am employing kitties. Come here, kitties. Everyone gets a good skritchin’ today!
LITTLE A. OF THE GRAND CONCOURSE JUNGLE PATROL
October 22nd, 2009 at 6:58 am [Reply]

Luann: Why do I find Bernice sexy? Because she is unattainable? I better discuss this with my therapist later.
catawba county pedant
October 22nd, 2009 at 7:16 am [Reply]

GT: As a resident of the Great State of North Carolina (state motto: “Esse Quam Videri” which is Latin for “What the fuck is a turn signal?”) living within spitting distance of Charlotte (believe me, I use a lot of spit because of that), I must call Fie and Hooey on today’s Gil Thorp for the following reasons:

1) There are no ‘bar brawls’ in Charlotte – there are ‘shootings in parking lots.’

2) If you ‘hurt someone in a bar brawl in Charlotte,’ you’re either out on bail or crammed three to a cell in the Mecklenburg County slammer – no one sends you to the bucolic Catawba County lockup which, judging by the last panel, has a Slurpee machine in the common area.

Thank you.

PS – happy birthday, TF!
Mela
October 22nd, 2009 at 7:35 am [Reply]

“Torturing You Into Volunteering Week” continues:

A3G: Ruby, no! Take pride in your Rodeo Barbie look! Don’t go on a makeover show where they’ll give you the same Jennifer Aniston haircut and browntastic wardrobe as every other victim!

Baldo: Ew, no! Quit drooling over the underage anime girl, Baldo’s Dad! (BTW, this was a crossover with a strip I’ve never heard of – news to me.)

‘Shaft: Snap his neck like that one Bond Girl, and you’ll be my new hero, nameless teenage foil.

FW: Sadly, Batiuk seems to have forgotten about the important role of pacing in comedy amidst all the cancercancercancer.

Luann: “The President called for service and here you are.” O… K. If the President calls for a mass suicide of people who’ll do whatever he says just because he said it, he’ll win back boatloads of respect from me after this. Oh, and Greg? Only bitter 30-something guys really listen to Metallica these days.

My Cage: This made me laugh… in a bitter, joyless way. It’s so accurate it hurts.

Pluggers: Did Reed Hoover die? Or could he not figure out how to use AOL after the Great PO Box Shutdown Scare of ’09? Not that I’m complaining, I’m just observing.
Bryan
October 22nd, 2009 at 7:40 am [Reply]

Fast Track: I thought there was no Senate confirmation for the post of Czar.
Luann: Metallica? That must be in Greg’s short list of “What the kids are listening to these days.”
Mary Worth: Oh no! I hope this isn’t another tale of Mary’s dreary youth.
My Cage: Well, at least he’s not going to be in “Wit.”
Rex Morgan, MD: “Becka if you ever need a balding fat man for sweaty, unrewarding sex in a motel room you can count on me!” Look at his expression in the second panel. Dude, looking like a rabbit that’s “gone tharn” is not the way to get laid. Believe me, I know.
Whippersnapper
October 22nd, 2009 at 7:50 am [Reply]

MW: My first reaction was, “Cripes, Mary! Not a story! Isn’t she already suffering enough?” But then I remembered that in Mary Worth’s opinion, no one is ever suffering enough.
LUJBEM FEJF
October 22nd, 2009 at 7:51 am [Reply]

#182-Josh- I stand corrected….$#$@%^!

Let the Fist-O-Justice smack you upside the head!
Brick Bradford
October 22nd, 2009 at 8:07 am [Reply]

9CL: Is Brooke talking about us?

Archie: Who knew Popeye had a sister?

A3G: Oh SNAP!

MW:NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
AhClem
October 22nd, 2009 at 8:11 am [Reply]

BULLETIN – EAS ACTIVATION REQUESTED
MEDDLE WARNING
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE CHARTERSTONE CA
537 AM PDT THU OCT 22 2009

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN CHARTERSTONE HAS ISSUED A

* MEDDLE WARNING FOR…
CHARTERSTONE COUNTY IN CENTRAL CALIFORNIA.

* UNTIL 930 PM CDT WED NOV 11 2009 OR THEREABOUTS.

* AT 535 AM PDT…NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE DOPPLER RADAR INDICATED
A SEVERE BIDDY CAPABLE OF PRODUCING A POIGNANT AND HEARTWARMING
STORY. THIS DANGEROUS THREAT WAS LOCATED IN THE CAFETERIA OF
CHARTERSTONE HOSPITAL…MOVING OUTWARD IN ALL DIRECTIONS AT
900 MPH.

THIS IS A DANGEROUS STORY. MOVE INTO YOUR BIDDY SHELTER NOW! IF NO
UNDERGROUND SHELTER IS AVAILABLE…MOVE INTO AN INTERIOR SOUNDPROOF
ROOM ON THE LOWEST FLOOR OF A STURDY STRUCTURE. AVOID NEWSPAPERS
AND ON-LINE WEB SITES THAT CARRY ‘MARY WORTH.’

LARGE PLATITUDES AND DAMAGING ANALOGIES ARE ALSO EXPECTED WITH
THIS STORY.

HEAVY SOBBING FROM THE STORY MAY PRODUCE LOCALIZED FLOODING. DO NOT
DRIVE INTO AREAS WHERE WATER COVERS THE ROAD.

REPORT SEVERE NAUSEA TO THE NEAREST LAW ENFORCEMENT AGENCY. THEY
WILL RELAY YOUR REPORT TO THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE.
buckyswife
October 22nd, 2009 at 8:12 am [Reply]

MT: Way to have a backbone, Bob—”I wanted to leave, but Ray said I couldn’t. As you can see, I have no choice.” I grow more unimpressed with Bob Jackson every day—which is saying something, given where I started.

It’s moot, anyway: By saying the words, “This is going to be the last time,” Bob has set into inexorable motion the movements of a plot that’s been around since, well, the dawn of time; any character uttering those words will discover that this time is the time that he a) gets caught or b) gets killed, or (and most likely in this case) c) gets embroiled in swampy intrigue involving gators; a gap-toothed, bug-eyed cretin; an oatmeal-raison puppy; and fists—lots and lots of flying fists.

MW: I’m taking my mind off the horror of Mary’s words in the last panel with the far more pleasant speculation as to why she and Adrian are sharing the same shade of lipstick; have they just broken away from a passionate kiss?

A3G: October 22, 2009: The day that Ruby became my second-favorite character in this strip.
buckyswife
October 22nd, 2009 at 8:13 am [Reply]

True Fable: Happy (Goaty) Birthday!

228 AhClem: Excellent!
buckyswife
October 22nd, 2009 at 8:15 am [Reply]

198 True Fable: I don’t believe the narration box; I think it’s a liar and we’re not going to get the reason at all. Hasn’t it, in the last month or so, promised us something about “the mystery of Mary Jane!” and “SaberTooth!”? And have we seen either of those? Nope.

I will never trust the narration box again.
Little Guy
October 22nd, 2009 at 8:32 am [Reply]

Curtis: “Clambake, the Vaudeville Revival”

9CL: And fuck you too, Brooke.

MT: Didn’t we have this plot line last month with the illegal dumpers?

Big Nate: Nice to coincidize Nate’s rise to power with a social issue.

Baldo: Cute Old Guy waves back at Yenny. Oh wait, it’s not interactive?

JP: Nice try Baretto. We know there’s constraints in office decorum. But can we have Steve’s office set up in at a Hooters in the future?
8th Man Fan
October 22nd, 2009 at 8:34 am [Reply]

Seems we have President Obama and Bush I to thank for all this comic strip volunteering this week. Since it took multiple Google searches to find even that indirect reference, they obviously did a great job promoting this.

If nothing else, provoked a nice little politicized debate on volunteerism at the Adam@Home comments section yesterday.
Uncle Lumpy
October 22nd, 2009 at 9:23 am [Reply]

#218 MolyBendum –

That’s a Fist o’ Justice shirt. And in the eternal struggle between the Fist o’ Justice and the Scales o’ Justice, I think we all know who will win!
Amateur
October 22nd, 2009 at 9:28 am [Reply]

MW: Oh, boy. Hunker down. [/MST3K]
Écureuil Écumant
October 22nd, 2009 at 9:30 am [Reply]

12 Perky Bird says: “It appears little Sassy the Dog is actually made out of delicious chocolate chip cookie dough.”

Or Bisquik pancake mix with rat raisins.
Professor Fate
October 22nd, 2009 at 9:37 am [Reply]

MW: ‘I mean why should I listen to you go on and on about youself – I need to talk about myself here.”
Bootsy
October 22nd, 2009 at 9:49 am [Reply]

Happy Birthday, Truman! Mine’s Saturday and there is sure to be vodka involved here too.

MW: This story better start with “Recently, I was riding my bicycle through the park and came upon a dear little dog. I stopped and picked him and took him for an x-ray. I called him Chester…”
Comcis Fan
October 22nd, 2009 at 9:53 am [Reply]

Will someone please explain “meta” to me in the context in which everyone is using it here.
Dingo
October 22nd, 2009 at 9:56 am [Reply]

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! No paragraph that begins “Let me tell you a story…” when uttered by Mary Worth can have a good outcome. Now we’ll have a distraction from Scott about some other Santa Royale hunyaks that Mary meddled and get back to the hospital in two or three months for his complete recovery.
soslight
October 22nd, 2009 at 10:00 am [Reply]

I’m almost certain that word balloon was intentional. The censors probably nixed the previous panel where Rusty broadcasts his intentions to hatchet Sassy to death and roast her on an open fire while Mark uncomfortably hems and haws and tries to turn the conversation back to himself by speaking as though he is Rusty. Rusty, being an idiot, is totally fooled and takes the cue.
spike
October 22nd, 2009 at 10:06 am [Reply]

Happy B-day, Mr. Fable!

AhClem @ 228: Pure genius!

FW: Why has Becky failed to pull this non-stop talker from the band by now?

MW: OK, Folks! Place yer bets as we spin the wheel! Childhood? Mary’s First Encounter with Jack? Time for another six-week story-within-a-story! (At which point Scott will have mercifully expired.) Grab a drink, munchies and settle in!

Phantom:Does Lamada know this is the same dude with whom he spoke earlier in the day?

SF: Up until now, we had only to deal with Brooke’s displeasure.
Écureuil Écumant
October 22nd, 2009 at 10:10 am [Reply]

FOOB: Everything today covered in lovely swathes of tweed. It must be Dress like a T.A. Day at the community college.
Comcis Fan
October 22nd, 2009 at 10:19 am [Reply]

FC: I had a decent snark for this, then decided to refrain, lest I give a life-threatening idea to an unbalanced person out there. Seriously.

S4th: If Sally and Ted are not having a “date night” at least once a month, theirs may fit the definition of a sexless marriage.

Blondie: Dithers in a nehru jacket? Halloween came a few days early at the office. I especially like his coquettish pose in panel 3.

OBH: The word ginormous bothers me, like melding “gynecology” and “enormous,” and does that conjure an image that anyone finds appealing?

Zits: Has Hector left this strip?
Edgy DC
October 22nd, 2009 at 10:20 am [Reply]

I like Mark’s dim awareness of Duncan’s family situation.

“Davey, right? I have vague memories of fucking up another Daley’s life six or seven years ago. It’s all a blur. Every year, they come to me poised at the brink of manhood, loaded with testosterone, and highly vulnerable to bad decisions. I should try and help steer them, but I’ve got the playdowns to worry about. Speaking of which, Dunc, how’d you like to kill Marty Moon for me?”
Anonymous
October 22nd, 2009 at 10:22 am [Reply]

Given that most TAs are grad students, Frothing Squirrel, shouldn’t Dress Like A TA Day involve far more T-shirts and jeans than tweed?

But then I *did* go to a techy grad school, so who knows what the humanities majors do these days :-)
Nerowolfgal
October 22nd, 2009 at 10:23 am [Reply]

Happy Birthday True Fable!

Here is an addy for some cute goats.

http://soonerscrampin.blogspot.com/2009/01/gerta-party-goat.html

I did looked up “party goat” one definition at the Urban Dictionary was great, the other gross. I leave it to you if you want to look.
CanuckDownSouth
October 22nd, 2009 at 10:23 am [Reply]

dang. that’s me above – name dropped out of my browser form.
mvg
October 22nd, 2009 at 10:31 am [Reply]

Skip Bittman (193): “He slaughters Mary by cutting out her still-beating heart and eating it.”

Which is so small & withered it would barely make an amusé bouche.

A3G: At least now I understand why Ruby insists on dressing like a pancake-house waitress desperately trying to get laid by every long-haul trucker who walks in.

9CL: What have “jokes” ever had to do w/9CL?

H&L: Yet even in the bathtub, the stink lines continue to rise from Ditto’s fetid hide. I had a roommate like that in my freshman year of college. He could literally walk out of a 20-minute shower w/paint-peeling b.o.

DT: Why does Dick have such stubby little T-rex arms?

RMMD: OK, the chloroform-soaked rag should be coming out of Tim’s pocket any day now…

Lesser Whark (202): Actually, based on previous appearances, I believe the talkative marcher is actually male. As for the outdated uniforms & marching style, I expect Bathos can only write/draw what he remembers from the days many years past when he actually ventured out into the world, when the sunlight didn’t BURN so much & he didn’t need so many pills to make the talking cat go away…
Niall
October 22nd, 2009 at 10:54 am [Reply]

Thursday Snarkay

Apt 3G: And here is the twist we had all guessed. Man, Ruby, twist that knife, why don’t you? “Come with me on this show just so I don’t go alone, but which I intend to win!” And I guess dressing like a stereotypipcal but historically-inaccurate Colonial Serving Girl could be called “crazy”, but in the bad way, not the good way TV folks want.

BC paradoxically offers the biggest clue as to what this whole strip collusion is about, while simultaneously making less sense than all of the rest combined.

Which makes me wonder how Make A Difference Day is different than Volunteer Week, when they’re asking on their website for people to… volunteer.

Beetle: I’d say “in before ‘sarge head 1/10 mile’ distortions” but I’m probably too late.

Blondie goes wacko again, and once again proves to be somewhat funny. (I said “somewhat”.) At least it’s not a golf joke!

Dick Tracy finally finds out it can useful to have atrophied limbs – they can get out of reach of famelic tigers unable to jump.

If Dilbert just got on the MAD day bandwagon (oo, what a poor choice for an acronym!), it lost a lot fo respect from me.

If Marmaduke creators don’t want us to easily interpret panels as bestiality references, they have to stop making it this easy. Sure, the real caption would be “FUCK! Get the hell out of my face! BAD DOG!” but unprintable, but just about any human being, even some native Pacific Island native who’d never set food in America or knew any English would string a sentence more coherent than this bizarre choice of words which only make us wonder what kind of tongue-licking Hitler gave Marm. And now my inner eye weeps.

Once again, the predominant colours in Mary Worth and My Cage coincide – today it’s orange. Twice in one week. Eerie.

Mary Worth: Okay, who complained that there wasn’t enoug Mary? Now we’re getting another bloody flashback! Gee, thanks a LOT! (Also known as: “and we thought this couldn’t get any worse.”)

My Cage is indeed sad. But now I wonder which classic strip would be the worst fit for a shark. I doubt anyone would make a school play based on Sherman’s Lagoon, for example. (Though in that world it’d probably be the equivalent of Blondie or somesuch.)

If PBS goes on an actual storyline from the last panel, Ces will win so much.
Rembrandt36
October 22nd, 2009 at 10:56 am [Reply]

When is Josh going to really put the hurt to that pompous ass Brooke of 9CL?
Darkefang
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:08 am [Reply]

What is with all the strips about volunteering this week? If this is some kind of national volunteer week, volunteer organizations might want to advertise it. The comics page is the only place I’ve heard any mention of it whatsoever.

And now, thanks to BC, I know the name of it is “Make a Difference Day.” I’ll volunteer a bit of information to whoever is organizing this event: If someone who consumes as much media as me didn’t hear of it until now, it’s safe to say that your marketing campaign missed a large chunk of it’s target audience.

9CL: If a joke isn’t funny, it’s the readers fault. Thanks for the clarification, Brook.

A3G: It sounds like Ruby’s been reading the Comics Curmudgeon.

Blondie: Today’s Blondie appears to be the victim of a rift in the space-time continuum. Dagwood and Mr. Dithers both usually dress like men from the 1930s. Yet apparently the significantly younger Dagwood was a young man in the 1950s, while the much older man was a young man for the three weeks in 1967 that nehru jackets were popular. When I try to place when the phrase, “You bet your sweet patootie, kiddo,” might have been uttered, my mind implodes.

Crankshaft: Why do I have the feeling that “you are one totally mental old dude,” is a phrase you hear a lot in the Tom Batiuk household?

MT: “1″ Days Without an Accidentally Misplaced Quotation.

MW: If life were really unpredictable, I wouldn’t be so certain that Mary’s story is going to be boring. And I wouldn’t be quite so sure that Mary was going to misquote some famous philosopher in the process.

RMMD: If this Rex Morgan story was a movie, it would be classified as “film snore.”
Écureuil Écumant
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:09 am [Reply]

249 A3G says: “At least now I understand why Ruby insists on dressing like a pancake-house waitress desperately trying to get laid by every long-haul trucker who walks in.”

… And I still remember Ruby with her apron and her pad / Feeding all the boys at Ed’s Cafe…
Mel AKA "Mel"
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:11 am [Reply]

239: Comcis Fan,
In most media, “meta” refers to anything that refers to itself. For instance, yesterday’s Cathy is being called meta because it makes a self aware reference. The mom screams about multiple appendages. In this strip, it is usually understood multiple arms — or legs — are drawn on characters to show movement. The mom acknowledging that she is aware of the other arms and perhaps, even, that she is a cartoon, is meta. (See also: Pearls Before Swine when the characters talk to Pastis; or Lio breaking out of his panel)
commodorejohn
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:17 am [Reply]

#189 Girl Reporter – I am totally filing away “you’re not the Lorax of me!” for the next argument where it would be suitable. I only wish I’d had it on hand for a few arguments back in my younger years…

A3G – Wow. Even the other characters admit that Tommie is boring beyond repair. Wow.

Curtis – continues to kick everybody else’s ass by, you know, being entertaining.

DTM – “Now, these ghost lights, on the other hand, will strike you dead if you look at them wrong. Be seeing you.”

Dilbert – does my favorite volunteer-themed comic of the entire week.

GT – Prison turns you into Marty Moon?

H&L – “Of course, he’ll never get there if the void keeps devouring our house, but it’s nice to dream.”

Luann – subtly rebels against the labor forced upon her by her “friend.” Luann, quit harrassing the bystanders and just tell Delta to fuck off to her face, if you don’t want to be doing this.

MT – Good God in Heaven, where can I get a coffeemaker with a carafe the size of a beach ball?

MW – Oh dear.

Monty – gets away with depicting a woman’s pubic triangle in the newspaper by being all cubist about it.

PBS – Oh man. I dunno if this is a one-shot joke, but I like it.

RMMD – Look, would you just shove him out into the rain already? Cripes.
Mibbitmaker
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:18 am [Reply]

mvg (#249):

DT: Why does Dick have such stubby little T-rex arms?

To match his fingers.

*****

MW:
Jeff: “Adrian… Mary… I got bad news: He’s dead.”

Adrian: “You mean he (CHOKE) succumbed to his shotgun injuries?” (breaks down loudly, in an abundance of melodramatic poses)

Jeff: “No, he came out of the coma with flying colors… but he heard that Mary, here, was going to tell one of her… ‘stories’… and Scott killed himself.”

Mary (insensitive): “What were his last words?”

Jeff: “…’M*A*S*H was right — next to Mary droning on with her quasi-meaningful, dead end stories, suicide IS painless!’ …then he shot himself.”
mollificent
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:19 am [Reply]

A3G: You know, I racked my brain for something brilliant to say about this, but I couldn’t come up with anything funnier than the strip itself. Well played, Ms. Shulock.

Blondie: I await our friend Fashion Police’s take on today’s Blondie with great anticipation. :)

MW: Mary’s going to do the Vulcan knockout grip on Adrian. It’s the only way she can get anyone to sit still for one of her stories. Thank God she can’t reach through the computer screen and…and…(ugh, I with I hadn’t just imagined that.)

Zits: Pierce has been watching that viral Louis CK video. (Which, by the way, made me LMAO…”Give it a second! It’s going to SPACE!!”)

Knight Life: Heh heh. Someone’s sleeping on the couch for the foreseeable future.

(Happy Birthday, Fable-licious!)
CanuckDownSouth
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:29 am [Reply]

OK, I’ve *participated* in Make A Difference Day a few times. The local Y advertised and organized matching people to their preferred projects. There was no preachy comic campaign 3 days beforehand when it’s too late to reorganize people’s lives. Or for some projects like park trail-clearing to go forward without a minimum commitment. I see a major conceptual Fail here just in terms of MAD recruitment; the comics awarenessfest should have been about a month ago.

Nevermind the quality of the comics produced.

How is Baby Blues working to make everyone everywhere hate the very thought of ever doing volunteer work? Let me count the ways:

1. A volunteerism “coach” in the school. I’d be investigating whether this is a paid position and if so, how much this wastes scarce educational resources.

2. This “coach” is nevertheless sufficiently incompetent to permit / encourage multiple commitments on one day, with presumably impossible overlapping time commitments

3. Not to mention that a minor is signed up for *any* out-of-school activity without a permission form prerequisite.

4. Anyone can sign anyone else up, apparently. Zoe is being taught a huge lesson of disrespect for others.

5. We just know the comic will show them doing it instead of the parents getting the school administrators in bigBIG trouble for attempting this in the first place
Mibbitmaker
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:33 am [Reply]

True Fable:

It turns out that, on the 2nd disc of the Popeye the Sailor 1941-1943 DVD, “The Hungry Goat” and “Happy Birthdaze” are right next to each other. That’ll make easy viewing today.

HB, TF!
CanuckDownSouth
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:33 am [Reply]

I really look forward to the upcoming A3G reality-TV makeover arc. Especially if I Dressed in the Dark resembles What Not to Wear – the robotic dystopic Dr Who version, that is.
Will
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:35 am [Reply]

Luann: Is everybody in that strip living by every word that falls from the President’s lips? Creepy.

As for the volunteer campaign, I did see several spots on TV last night on ABC hyping it. That was the first I’ve seen it outside of Luann’s constant harping.
Vince M
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:35 am [Reply]

Happy B-day, Mr. Fable!
I don’t have much contact with goats here in the big city, but once on a drive I stopped to check out some vineyards in west Illinois – then I heard an agonized bleating. Shortly I spotted a little goat, his head stuck through a wide-mesh wire fence, unable to get back out because of his horns – poor kid. I approached him speaking softly so as to not to spook him, and guided his horns free. He trotted off and I felt I’d gained a lot of goat-karma points.
TheDiva
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:39 am [Reply]

C’shaft: I vote that this strip be officially renamed “Totally Mental Old Dude.”

DT: In today’s strip, the role of Agent Ennen will be played by Joan Rivers.

FW: Well, Batiuk kept the dreary, defeatist attitude of Funkytown at bay for a few days, but we knew it couldn’t last.

HotC: Screw you, Heart, geeks always have the best costumes.

Marvin: I’m still trying to figure out what sort of parents would willingly force a squirming, messy, non-potty trained toddler into fancy clothes on a daily basis.

MW: Adrian can’t win. If she rushes into an engagement, the guy’s a con artist; if she hesitates, he gets shot. Maybe she should just remain single and avoid heartbreak, not to mention procreation.

Pluggers: $500 OBO? I’m guessing the engine is not included. Or the wheels.
Comcis Fan
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:44 am [Reply]

Thanks, Mel. I feel like such a Plugger having to ask.
queek
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:46 am [Reply]

221: I sincerely hope that you aren’t using the same therapist as the fellow from Candorville.

HotC: if only this scene was in a different comic, one not made up of children. Imagine what Baretto could do with it with his cast. Imagining what he’d do with a gender-flipped version could lead to head-tilts and/or drooling.

Baldo: O_O

Yenny: self inflicted black-eyes? go go Gainax girl!

MG&G: I lol’d

PBS: please let this not be a one-shot.
mvg
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:53 am [Reply]

Niall (250): “But now I wonder which classic strip would be the worst fit for a shark.”

Snuffy Smith – sharks have too many teeth for any role in this strip. (Of course the same could be said of an 8-month-old baby.)
Écureuil Écumant
October 22nd, 2009 at 1:08 pm [Reply]

255 commodorejohn says: “Monty – gets away with depicting a woman’s pubic triangle in the newspaper by being all cubist about it.”

Yeah, and “She…um…she has a beautiful trapezoid…” which happens to be the only trapezoid on the whole shmegilla. He got away with a mouthful there, all right.

262 Vince M: That’s a double win; it comes under the dual headings of Ur-Legend and Goat. Nice day’s work, my friend.
True Fable
October 22nd, 2009 at 2:41 pm [Reply]

#247 Nerowolfgal – GOAT! Sooner goat! – family home stompin’ grounds goat! Thanks!

#262 Vince – Indeed, you win a big bouquet of goat-karma for that kindness!

# 267 Écureuil Écumant – Re: Ram in a Thicket: “The figure’s genitals are gold, while its belly was silver plate.” Well hell YES, even back artisans knew to apply precious metals and stones to goat carcasses because they knew before anyone else, that goats are the coming thing. The Cradle of Civilization I reckon! See, y’all? Gold Goat Balls. That pretty much says it all.

Thanks all of you! So far it’s been a grand day, with mischief planned for all weekend! Fortunately I have ninja goats to keep me out of trouble, or at least maybe go my bail.
Johnny Knuckles
October 22nd, 2009 at 3:50 pm [Reply]

Yay! Uninspired phone-it-in cartoonists peddling Generalissimo Obama’s volunteering guff. Can I see the comic section after you’re done, Pop? I can hardly wait to read the funnies after the newspapers get their federal bailouts.
Marion Delgado
October 22nd, 2009 at 9:01 pm [Reply]

Berenice will never have to deal with any other Big O in her life.

Unless there’s stuff we haven’t learned about yet in her shaky family life, in which case she WILL learn about the other Big O – Oprah, when she goes on with her book about the wounded souls of teen girls.
Just Say No To Political Propaganda
October 23rd, 2009 at 2:11 pm [Reply]

There’s a far more sinister reason why the comics are pushing volunteering lately,and you may have noticed a lot of ads on TV promoting volunteering as well.

Read this-

http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/10/15/leaked-memo-reveals-the-white-house-has-control-of-your-television-set/
Sue D. Nymme
November 19th, 2009 at 7:28 pm [Reply]

“Is “Rusty” just one of Mark’s many personalities…?”

I lol’d

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Hey, kids, volunteer (or Marmaduke will eat you)

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