Post Content

Shoe, 5/31/06

Let’s pretend, for the sake of argument, that the “joke” emanating from the TV set in this comic is funny and worth publishing in newspapers around the country. Does it add anything to American life to have said joke presented in comic strip format, with the bleary-eyed Perfessor staring at it expressionlessly from his easy chair? Why not jettison the cartoon aspect altogether and just have a feature called “Jokes We’ve Heard”, where amiable fellows share little riddles and bon mots from their repertoires with readers, eliminating the need to do all that tedious drawing? That’d be much easier.

Unless … the joke is that the Perfessor has had a massive heart attack hours before, and that, while he’s watching this funeral ad, he’s actually dead. Now that’d be funny. No, wait, actually, it wouldn’t, but at least there’d be a point to it.

Slylock Fox, 5/31/06

5) Undead fiends stalk the night, desperately thirsty for the blood of the living! (Answer: All too true!)

Remember when vampires had huge mountaintop castles in the Balkans and mysterious magical carriages to carry them and their victims to and fro? Whereas now they apparently have to take the bus with the rest of the puds. Jeez, vampires are losers.