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Hello, readers! Have you noted that it’s quite hot in many portions of North America, and maybe other parts of the world too, who can tell? I will acknowledge this and then briefly remind you that Baltimore-area persons should come see me make funny joke-like noises on Wednesday the 24th in Baltimore before quickly and sweatily moving on to your comment of the week:

“Pretty sure the banner in Funky Winkerbean’s first panel reads ‘HAPPY AND THEN ANGRY,’ which is exactly how I felt before and then immediately after reading this strip.” –Lomo

And your runners up! Very funny!

“Yeah, Heathcliff? Just go ahead and eat the damn fish. People are starting to talk. I swear, I’m desensitized to the point where if I opened the newspaper and saw a strip of him practicing erotic asphyxiation with a dead eel I’d be all, ‘Oh, whatever. Now, what’s that Funky Winkerbean up to? Sucking? LOL, I love the funny papers!'” –notmydesk

This is the most horrifying FW strip ever. I guess it’s fitting that a strip featuring Dinkle is tone-deaf.” –Rusty

“There was a story arc in Ultimate Spider-Man where Spidey had to covertly make it home from Brazil by hiding in a cargo hold in a boxful of ladies’ underwears. That was surprisingly less embarrassing than watching him just take a plane like a normal person.” –C. Sandy Cyst

“Surprisingly, ‘If I could get to Moon Valley, would my parents take me back?’ is the actually one of the most common phrases heard during astronaut training.” –Captain Hammer

“I might have been fast enough to stop him if I had used contractions in my speech, but there are some things a man is not willing to do.” –J. Elhew Bisbee, Hobo Detective

“So tell us, Heather, what’s the vomiting like? Fast and furious, or slow and thoughtful? Straight down, or in an arc across the room? If you had to describe it, would it be a cool mountain stream, a lazy river, or a fireman’s hose?” –pugfuggly

“Yes, I’m a physician! No, the hand holding this phone has no relation to my or any other human body! Don’t make me go 74-89 on you!” –Doctor Handsome

I’m afraid this could be a 10-41. Very afraid. So afraid I’m screwing up my face in a precious little moue of disgust. God, why did I take a medical degree? Wasn’t there an easier way to make money?” –DownInTheValley

“I’m a bit perplexed by Francis’s motion lines. He doesn’t strike me as an especially quick or active fellow, and smudgy dots give it a psychedelic feel. Could they be tracers? Is the never seen fourth child who witnesses the hijinks in Momma tripping balls? All the time? It would explain the ghastly malformed horrorshow that passes for the human form in this strip.” –Herr Komerad Kommissar Denny

“Thanks to fashion forward Gil Thorp last week and Randy Parker today, I now know that men’s shorts are finally rising above the knee again. I think it’s important to stay abreast of the cultural norms for men, otherwise I’d do something embarrassing like calling my publisher to see if his flight home was okay.” –Anonymous

“Bah, when Billy whacks Jeffy’s head off with the golf club, he’s totally going to slice. On the plus side, he seems to be using a seven iron, so Jeffy’s head may get some loft to it.” –Lily Sincere

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